Your name is C Montgomery Burns, and you are furious. Not the cold, merciless anger that has sustained you all these years even when according to countless so-called medical practitioners your life should have ended long ago, but a fiery bonfire of wrath that has kept you warm these past months even during the brief-yet-humiliating period you were…Temporarily between mansions. Yes, that was a good way of putting it.
It has been ages since you've felt this way, not since the fall of Berlin and the burning to ashes of so many plots and schemes has such a rage echoed through your frail body. And the worst part of it is that your recent downturn is not because of the actions of someone you might call one of your rivals in business (few of them though there are), or those robber baron kings part of you can't help but admire (such a loss to one of them would also be galling, but at least it would be understandable!). No, the thing that truly makes you howl madly into the night, grinding your teeth until they shriek in agony, is that you've lost everything you'd earned through over a century of exploiting your lessers to…HIM
The humiliation was enough that a lesser man would have surely taken his own life, but not you; you're not like that coward of a painter. You are made of far sterner stuff, the product of generations of ill-gotten wealth and more than a little dirty dealing with powers that would make the rabble shrivel and die from just a look. You aren't done yet; you might only have a handful of minions compared to before, but with your hateful cunning you'll make HIM rue the day that he ever dreamed that he could take even a single haypenny from you! HIM and that entire brood of mouth-breathing simpletons HE calls a clan.
You are C Montgomery Burns, and by the time you're through everyone will know your power. First Springfield, then the rest of the world. Your will be done.
87 (Roll)+27 (Burns Intrigue)+22 (Grimes Jr Intrigue)+2 (Loyalty)=138!
69 (Roll)+16 (ABE'S Intrigue)+29 (MONA'S Intrigue)+10 (???)+10 (???)+2 (Loyalty)=136! Bare Success!
Hellfish Interrupt!
But before you could set even a single one of your long-ranging plans into motion, you receive a call from your newest lackey, the one with a not unimpressive hatred for HIS son. You grind your teeth at the news that your hideout has been made. And if that wasn't bad enough, in the same instant you learn that the damnable MONA SIMPSON is back in town, foiling your plans as though she never left!
This is a setback, you admit to yourself as you give the order to blow the building to smithereens to deny HIM any chance to get anything of value from the place, but not a completely unexpected one. The fact that an agent of yours spots that mafioso arriving on the scene shortly after it's blown to bits only affirms the decision. He would have been trouble to deal with. You just need to quickly find a new place before…Why is your vision blurry?
Oh no.
Search For Medicine DC Higher Is Better:
82 (Roll)+16=98. Great Success!
First things first, you are not so prideful that you can't admit that your body, though quite spry for your age, is still affected by the ravages of your eternal foe Father Time. And worse still, the medicines that you must rely on (for now) are all kept under lock and key in your mansion, where you can't get it.
Fortunately you have options, and you direct Smithers to find a new source for your medications. And while his first plan was not the best (a daytime pharmacy robbery? How far you've fallen if this is what you're doing), the follow-up to raid the home of that quack doctor who'd apparently died in the Dome had done gangbusters! With what you were able to acquire you should have enough medication to last at least long enough to get what you deserve.
Find A New Hideout DC 80:
46 (Roll)+27 (Burns Intrigue)+22 (Grimes Jr Intrigue)+2 (Loyalty)-5 (???)=92. Success!
Your new base of operations is…Well, it's not as good as the warehouse you'd been holed up in. Still, needs must, and at least you were able to find a place that's at least vaguely acceptable before the end of summer. That would have been…Less than ideal.
Still, no point in taking too many risks just yet. You make sure to instill in your subordinates the importance of keeping their idiot heads down until your throat goes hoarse, and then begin yet another search of no small importance…
Find ??? DC Higher Is Better:
42 (Roll)+27 (Burns Intrigue)+20 (???)-5 (???)=84. Great Success!
You can't help but chuckle to yourself as you look upon your prize. While you've experienced some setbacks lately, this little victory almost makes it all worth it. With a little more work, your fiendish plot will be able to truly be set in motion!
Soon…Soon your revenge will be complete, and there's not a damn thing that ABRAHAM SIMPSON will be able to do about it, not him or any of HIS miserable offspring!
You chuckle darkly into the night, while behind you Smithers fidgets uncomfortably, a deeply concerned look on his face as you begin to cackle in a way that would be called eccentric if you still had your wealth. Now it's just crazy, though no one is brave enough to say so.
Random Event Roll: 29
To your deep anger, you didn't know that MONA SIMPSON was back in town until SHE was already strolling through your former base of operations like SHE owned the place. At one point Smithers spots HER making HER way into your plant as though SHE owned the place, so you can assume that SHE'S working with that OAF OF A HUSBAND OF HERS, as though the raid on your base wasn't clue enough.
QM Note: That RER really wasn't very good for you guys, though you certainly recovered admirably. *Insert Frowning Metal Sonic gif here*
