DEI (Doofenshmirtz)
Clean Up Those Gnomes
DC: 50
??? + ??? = 71
SUCCESS!
After Ned's talk with the pharmacist, Doofenshmirtz seems to be in high spirits and even more motivated to fix things up in Doofania.
One of the Normbots (you think it's the same one who advertised Doofania and got upgraded that one time, though it's hard to tell for certain obviously) leads the charge, tirelessly cleaning the streets and various businesses.
It takes quite a bit and would undeniably be tedious if a human was doing it, but The machines seem content and soon enough the gnomes are all gone.
Comfortable Clothes-Inator
44
You heard from the lemon vine (you think that's how that saying goes) that apparently there's a sudden influx of coziness going on in Doofania due to the sudden appearance of comfy clothes on Everyone…literally everyone! From the babies to the dogs everyone is now suddenly wearing comfy clothes!
Announce working with Old Abe´s Family Emporium for DOOF TV Content!
DC: Higher the Better.
???+???= 64
A few days after Flanders came back from Danville, informing you of the agreed project that DEI and you were gonna Collab on, Doofenshmirtz started advertising on DOOF TV about
"new fresh content" coming in thanks to the support of your company.
There were several announcements and even a few musicals with the objective to build hype, but so far from what you could tell, responses have been middling. People are somewhat interested in what DOOF TV will run next, but there isn't the level of excitement that the pharmacist expected, according to his social media post.
When questioned about what type of content would be shown, he replied with things like "It's a surprise" or "Just trust us, pal, gonna knock your socks off!".
Well, while it might not have generated the expected response, people now are aware that you will be working with Doofenshmirtz to create more content…and some are looking at you both to see the results of it.
DRAKKTECH (Shego)
Lobby to Repeal the SRA
DC: 35
??? + ??? = 69
SUCCESS!
That blue guy is appearing before Congress again. After the chaos that happened last time, they don't seem very enthused to see him, though they are professional enough to not immediately turn him away.
Drakken squints suspiciously at the door, clearly paranoid the Disney Princesses are going to show up and bicker with him again (... that's a sentence), but they don't show this time so he is more easily able to plead his case.
He isn't as impassioned as he was last time, but he gets his point across well enough and, while they obviously aren't going to instantly undo it, talks about repealing the SRA are wayyyy more likely to actually get somewhere now.
….Why do you feel strangely proud? You don't know this guy!
Seed Doubt about the Freezer
DC: 70
??? + ??? = 42
FAILURE!
Unfortunately for Shego, her other main activity is much less lucrative.
It doesn't take a genius to realize she isn't very happy about the Freezer, but it's not like she can just go all the way to Alaska and fight everyone there herself (and you get the feeling even if she could, she would deem it too much effort).
So Monkey Fist "independently" appears on a radio show to voice his opinion the Freezer might have been rushed and, with the government's track record, the public shouldn't hold their breath it will be effective.
The host pretty quickly realized it was unlikely Monkey Fist personally cared all that much and needled him about it until he got annoyed and snapped.
"Of
course I don't care! But my boss does! And-"
He seemed to realize pretty quickly he had slipped up.
"...Can you cut that?"
"No."
"Drat."
Thankfully, it being a radio show and all, not enough people heard it to completely screw Shego over, but it had a just sizable enough audience that a decent chunk of people figured it must be at least a little effective if it clearly got under Shego's skin like this.
…Though again, it's a radio show, so most people don't even know this happened and remain positive or neutral on the subject.
KRONOSCORP (Syndrome)
Send out Feelers
DC: 60
??? + ??? = 91
SUCCESS!
Syndrome, surprisingly, handed Birthday Bandit right over to the police not long after his capture of him. However, the clown mysteriously keeled over In transport, and didn't make it.
After a stop and search, a random officer, Miranda Wright, had poison found on her. The blonde cop insisted it must have been planted, but in the end the options were to believe her and go after the most likely candidate, Syndrome, a man with a huge multi billion dollar company, or take the easy route and arrest the small-time cop who at least looked guilty. Sad as it is, the choice that was picked was obvious.
Syndrome expressed sympathy, providing some plausible evidence Wright had been desperate for money after the loss of her old partner and getting transferred unexpectedly and must have figured if she killed the Bandit she could convince him to still give the reward money.
While all that was going on, it successfully served as a smoke screen for most people that those Syndrome robots seemed to be traveling across the country, looking into something….
LEVIATHAN CORP
Handle Bad PR
DC: 85
??? + ??? = 65
FAILURE!
Needless to say, even now that he's dead, people are still pretty salty at Leviathan Corp for making finding the Birthday Bandit harder for them. Hell, people seem
more mad about it since him dying obviously means there's no chance he'll escape or something and they can keep trying.
The mysterious heads of the company still won't publicly show themselves, and send out an apology on Twitter. It's definitely not the worse apology you have seen, but the robotic, impersonal nature of it means it comes off as insincere to enough people their stock prices are still suffering, albeit not as bad by now, but that's clearly just due to simple time passing and people finding other things to get mad about rather than a sign people forgive them.
Hire new People
DC: 90
??? + ??? = 68
FAILURE!
After that mild disaster, Leviathan Corp is clearly desperate, as they actively start putting out job applications on job sites. Wouldn't be that weird, except LC never seemed to actually hire anyone outside of buying up other companies.
…You kinda wonder how it operates then, but you suppose that didn't really matter to you personally.
Regardless, no one is really biting right now, their current unpopularity and the pay being good but not exceptional compared to others is not making them a very enticing place to work.
THE U.S. GOVERNMENT
Reach out to Seth Co. Manufacturing about the Famine
DC: 65
??? + ??? = 138
CRITICAL SUCCESS!
While this Leviathan Corp was having some tough times, it seems the Government was managing not to screw things up yet.
Just now there has been an announcement from part of Seth Manufacturing Co. that one corn company, that the government will be working with them in the upcoming months to up their corn production and distribution, so more people can receive food more easily and at better prices!
The news has been receiving excellent support, the citizens happy that the famine issue is starting to be handled by the guys in black suits who make them look better.
You just hope the government doesn't drop the ball on this.
GLOMGOLD INDUSTRIES (Flintheart Glomgold)
Make a New Social Media Site
DC: 70
??? + ??? = 177
CRITICAL SUCCESS!
You thought after the Birthday Bandit fiasco you wouldn't have to deal with anything related to Glomgold ever again, but apparently that duck managed to do something so impressive it made the news…several times!
Apparently, just a few days after the showdown in the Junkyard, the Waddle company, owned by Glomgold, and run by some Mark Beaks guy had released a new Social Media Site…and oh boy it has been making waves! The amount of publicity and advertisement made was insane.
The new site was called GoldBook and it had everything that normal users and influencers could ask for…and even things that they didn't know they wanted!
(As an interesting tidbit, apparently some company called Facebook tried to sue Glomgold for apparently almost copying the name…they even went to court…but they lost the case and Glomgold sued them right back, gathering even more attention to his new site!)
Not only that, the website supports something called "live streaming", making it popular especially with those people that like to play in those consoles Bart always fools around.
Glomgold has been using this site specifically to rant to all the world how he had the Bandit almost in his grasp, ready to deliver it to him, before Syndrome had stolen the Bandit and taken him away, depriving him from the bounty, and demands that Kronos Corp to cough up the money promised.
Incidentally, it seems like Glomgold and his GoldBook are in somewhat of a discussion with Encom, the company reached out to the duck to ask to adapt his website and make it more compatible with their systems, but the Mega Billionaire just outright refused!
ZOOTOPIA (Bellwether)
You sit back in your office, humming. You have to admit, things are pretty chaotic, and not in the way you are used to. Well, you're starting to get used to it by now with how your life has panned out.
…That's kinda scary.
Thankfully, before you can dwell on that for too long, you get a call. You sigh, hoping it's not a scam caller. Those things are obnoxious!
"Hello? Is this Abraham Simpson?" A somewhat meek voice asked. Huh. It sounds vaguely familiar.
"Uh, yes. Who's this?"
"Oh, pleased to meet you, sir! I'm Mayor Dawn Bellwether of Zootopia."
Ah. That's where you recognized it from.
You briefly considered just hanging up. Those shock collars were made by her, after all, or at least made on her orders, so you have the immediate urge to tell her to screw off and go on with your day.
"I wish to get in contact with you about an important justice system matter."
"Why not talk to the mayor, the chief or the warden then?"
"...Well-"
(It shows flashbacks of Bellwether calling Mayor Quimby, Chief Wiggum and the warden respectively.
"Hello, there, this is Mayor Dawn Bellwether, of Zootopia-"
"Ma'am, if I value getting any votes from these yahoos, I must tell to fu-"
X
"Uh, hello, this is Mayor Dawn Bellwether-"
"From Zootropolis?"
"Close enough."
"Heh heh, good to know, good to know… Go fu-"
X
"Hello, this is Mayor Dawn Bellwether, of Zootopia-"
"The maker of those shock collars?"
"...Yes."
"Just making sure. Please, ma'am, kindly fuck off.")
"...It didn't go well. So you seemed like the best next pick."
"Ok then. What, exactly, are you calling about?"
"Well, those two main people in charge of Kamp Krusty? Mr. Black and Sergeant Whiteman? I wish to have them transferred to a Zootopia prison."
"... Can't say I give a rat's ass about them, but may I ask, why?"
"Well, I'll be honest with you, sir. You seem like a smart and trustworthy man-" That was pretty blatant flattery, but you keep your mouth shut. "-You see, people seem to be… misunderstanding the purpose of the shock collars as a result of their horrendous, inexcusable actions. So I wish to take better responsibility for my mistake and have them in a Zootopia prison to show my dedication to fixing things and show no one who does stuff like this will go unpunished if I can help it. And while they are obviously punished in your jail, that message is easier to send if they're in mine. So what do you say? Not like it matters. Either way they will rot in cells for the rest of their miserable lives. And while I can't offer monetary rewards, I don't advocate for bribes, I am sure I could help in other ways."
You suppose She had a point. And as much as she gave you bad vibes, she was literally the mayor of an entire city, who knows what connections she had. And The specific jail those two were in didn't truly matter at the end of the day. Still, with how Springfieldians are, they might prefer to have them in their jail to better know they are facing justice since they would be in town.
Hmmm … decisions, decisions.
[ ] Hand Mr. Black and Sergeant Whiteman to a Zootopia prison: They will still be facing justice either way, and it gets you in with another major faction. What do you have to lose? (Gain slight appreciation from Bellwether, increasing her opinion rank with you; unlock a collaboration with Bellwether)
- [ ] Joint Training Between the Springfield and Zootopia Police Departments: While they have been improving at a shockingly steady rate, at the end of the day your police… aren't the best. The ZPD are way more dedicated and competent, and they seem more than willing to offer advice and training! (Your police become better trained, increasing their trait to protect Springfield by +5)
- [ ] Increase Springfield PR: Although she is having her own issues currently, at the end of the day, Bellwether is a politician. She has connections and skills that could easily be used to make your beloved hometown look good. (Bellwether pulls some strings and makes some calls to boost up Springfield to the public, making you seem more appealing to collab with or sell stuff to)
- [ ] Increase Anthro Immigration: Though not without controversy, Bellwether is ultimately still the mayor of one of the bigger Anthro populated cities in the world. If she says Springfield is Anthro friendly, quite a few will listen to her. (Increase immigration of Anthros towards Springfield, though more leaning towards "prey" due to Bellwether being much more popular with them than "preds"; increased income gains from said new citizens)
[ ] Keep the monsters: You fought hard to apprehend them! Why should you hand them over to someone who indirectly helped them!?
SPRINGFIELD
BURNS
Fortify your Base
DC: 60
??? + ??? = 79
SUCCESS!
You are obviously a bit paranoid about if Burns is making any major moves. Even though you know where it is, obviously, you forbid anyone from going back to his base until you have a plan and are fully prepared. It's obviously just too risky if he sees them, both in the sense they might get captured and that even if they don't Burns might scurry off.
Still, you have Mona and the Finale keep an eye out and ear to the ground. You don't quite like what they discover.
It seems Sideshow Bob has already recovered from his injuries (though considering some of the insane things he has bounced back from, you aren't COMPLETELY surprised) and had been found skulking around the back allies of hardware stores, sneaking in and grabbing things when the owners or employees aren't looking. He does actively attack one or two as well, though thankfully no one is killed.
In the end, Bob only really makes off with 200 dollars worth of materials max, but if you know Burns,
and you do, you don't doubt that's still more than enough for him to make at least decent defenses…
Find a new Burns 6 Member
No DC, the higher the better
95
SUCCESS!
This next thing genuinely disturbs you.
According to Willie, he sees Frank Grimes Jr.
at Bart and Lisa's school!
Thankfully, he doesn't make any efforts to approach your grandkids, or any other kid in their social circles from what he saw. That isn't to say he talked to no one, though.
Willie went to get his rake to beat the crap out of the guy when he heard Grimes talking in hushed whispers to what was, based on the voice, clearly a student, but when he returned both were gone.
Principal Skinner was informed and was as incensed and worried as you were, thankfully, making sure to inform all teachers and faculty to keep an eye out for suspicious behavior and to talk to their students.
No one has come forward yet (and a few get confused and think this is just a stranger danger drill), so you pray whoever Grimes was talking to told him to take a hike, though you doubt it…
RANDOM EVENT ROLL
74
You didn't realize how close it was to the Holidays… At the end of the day, this might be the first Christmas you are actually EXCITED for in a long, long time.
Even when things were at their worse between you two, Homer still invited you over most holidays, but it was pretty clearly always an obligation and to make the kids happy rather than actually wanting you around. This year, there's some lingering awkwardness, but he seems much more willing to have you over and just have a good time together.
Mona was obviously also coming, and all in all it just felt… nice.
You hummed as you adjusted your shirt a bit, more out of slight nerves than it actually mattering all that much.
Suddenly, there was a knock on your… window???
"...Gloria, if you got lost in the backyard again, you can just-" You began, opening the window… and blinking at what you saw.
Sitting there in a familiar floating sled pulled by reindeer was a fat man in a red suit and black buckled shoes.
".... Hello Abraham." He smiled awkwardly.
You immediately try to close the window.
"Wait wait wait!" Santa pleads.
You take a deep breath, your temper cooled by your new experiences as boss of an entire company.
"What do you want?" You huffed.
"Look, Abraham, I… I know we didn't part on the best terms and that is on me. I can accept when I made a grave mistake. I am so, so sorry." He said sincerely, looking genuinely morose. You massage your temples.
On one hand, that island had been truly awful, and Santa broke a promise to get you out of there that he could have EASILY kept… but on the other hand, wouldn't it be hypocritical of you to seek forgiveness from your son and then refuse to forgive others? At the end of the day, it's not like you were trapped on that island to this day or something.
"...I won't ever fully move on, I don't think. But I think I can accept the apology enough to not stay pissy about it." You admit.
"Wonderful! I am happy to hear that, Abe. Now, I can't exactly stay all night, but I do have a gift for you."
You give a flat look as Santa gives you a big lump of coal with a huge smile on his face.
"...On second thought I don't forgive you, jerk."
Santa blinks and seems to realize the implications at that, coughing awkwardly.
"Ah! No no no, it's not one of my 'You were Naughty' trinkets! Well, not technically. That, Abe, is one of my
magic coals. Even the most heartless, truly naughty person in existence, when given it, will be overcome with debilitating shame. I realized Magically shaming people into being nice is, in and of itself, kind of naughty, so I stopped using them in 1882. But I have faith you won't abuse this power." He explained.
You stared at the coal. He really trusted you with this?
"...Thank you." You said, sincerely, despite your aforementioned continued misgivings.
"You're welcome, Abraham. Keep up the good work, ok? I have faith in you." Santa smiled, cracking his reindeer's reins. They flew off into the night.
"HOHOHOHO! MERRY CHRISTMASSSSS!"
You stare after him, thumbing the coal.
Your life just gets weirder and weirder.
In the morning, some of your employees seemed to be in exceptionally good spirits. Even Lena and Moe were a little less broody. You were kinda surprised, until Ned showed you a present he got, and explained all of them had received.
'A little gift from An old friend of Abe's. Be sure to thank him.'
Maybe Santa wasn't so bad after all.
…You're still salty about the island, though.
REWARD: You and Santa aren't exactly friends, but you've buried the hatchet for the most part!
Santa gave a piece of Magic Coal! When handed to an enemy in a fight, they get so genuinely overcome with shame if they have done anything bad they get a -10 to Martial for the rest of combat, even if they normally wouldn't care or would revel in bad deeds. It can only be used once, however, so choose wisely!
Santa gave all of your Hero Units the perfect gift (what it is will be left ambiguous for all 14, but feel free to headcanon it and the like)! Each of them will have +10 to their Personal Actions next turn.