Fate/Clusterfuck (Fate/Stay Night)

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-siSTOeNorM

[The Big Talk]

• [Illya]

Thanks to @Armoury for the beta!

—

"You look like shit," Ayako comments helpfully.

You stare at her reflection in the mirror, not having bothered to turn around since she entered a moment ago. Ayako, herself, also looked like shit. She looked exhausted, drained, battered and bruised. Ruby was held limply in her hands, even the stick drooping a little in apparent exhaustion. Though, as the door closes behind her it springs to life, flying across the room to wrap itself around your wrist and… purr.

You ignore that, because to acknowledge the fact that a stick had a deep lust towards you was to invite yourself to more madness than you think you could deal with at the moment. And not only for the fact apparently the vast majority of the women in your life, for some ungodly reason you had yet to discern, had apparently fallen for you. "I feel like shit," you finally decide to respond. "The town is on fire and several people I grew up with are dead."

The slight smirk that had been on Ayako's face fades away, and she turns her head instead towards the window. Perhaps to see signs of smoke, but the snow covered forest we were in revealed nothing.

"I managed to call my parents… they're fine at least." Ayako says quietly. "But after this… will anything ever be the same? Can I even go back to them after all this?"

"Of course you can," you reply. "But things are going to be different… You are technically a Magus now."

"And that's supposed to mean?" Ayako asks, she turns her head to me as she does, her eyes catching in the light.

"We're supposed to be separate from humanity."

Ayako blinks slowly, then sticks out a hand, flattens it, then presses it to a spot just above her hips but below her stomach. "You got pretty deep in humanity though?"

You can't help it, you laugh. Turning around to face Ayako as you lean back against the dresser with the mirror mountain atop it. "That… wasn't what I was talking about."

"I know, something something…" Ayako raises her hand and wiggles her fingers. "The world of magic and man must never meet, lest the two come to blows… or people bugging you to turn things into gold. Doesn't really matter."

"It rather does matter, actually." You reply. "The Magus make it a rather noted point to avoid revealing ourselves. People tend to react poorly to magic."

"Yeah, magic put me in a cat girl outfit and caused me to try and kidnap you."

"Try?"

"Well, yeah. I got caught didn't I?"

You smile. "I think, technically, you still kidnapped me successfully. Caster was… quite upset. But in any case. We try to remain a secret, people tend not to trust those who can do the impossible."

"I don't think that's much going to matter considering everything that's happened, I'd imagine Fuyuki is on every news station in the world."

You nod your head. "Probably, now everyone knows there's more to the world."

Ayako lets out a sigh, letting her head gently rest against the window. "You think we could get on camera? It's kind of important."

"For your family?" you ask.

"Oh, god no." Ayako says, rapidly shaking her head. "Issei, we haven't been in school for a week."

Your thoughts come to a pause, as a faint sense of unease fills you. "Oh, if we survive this…"

"Issei is going to kill us." Ayako finishes.

"I could deal with him if you give me a nice, relaxing linseed oil rub Shirou~" Ruby purrs.

To your horror, Ayako looks like she is contemplating it.

—

It was perhaps a credit to how tired you were, that when arms wrapped slowly around you in the tub you didn't flinch. But then, you had smelled her before she touched you. It wasn't the scent of magic, it was the scent of her perfume that tickled your senses. She always smelled like the grain fields on that island, it was a pleasant, comforting scent, and you say nothing as you lean back, resting your hair against her shoulder and turning your head to look Circe in the eye.

She smirks. "There was a time you would have attempted to shout and escape the bath."

You let out a breath. "I'm too tired for that, and I'm used to you being perverted."

"Perverted?" Circe replies. "Nonsense boy. I merely know what pleasures I desire out of life and take them." She extends a leg in the tub, flawless, almost porcelain like skin glimmering in the light before she dips it back in the water. "I have lived long enough without truly living."

"I'm surprised you were interested in me at all, considering our respective ages."

Circe doesn't move for a few moments, and when she finally speaks, she sounds rather… annoyed. "I'll pretend you didn't just call me old, and instead…" Her arms wrap around your shoulders. "Perhaps, and there are certainly those who would claim I am robbing the cradle… but I do love you, and… you are the first man to have ever loved me back. I would be foolish not to seize my chance. This was the only timeline where we were to meet."

… "You knew all this was going to happen didn't you. You've played coy around Medea about 'watching' and moving when the time was right."

"I knew bits of it, glimpses, visions. I was meant to be dead by now, but I held on as I knew this was the one timeline where myself and Medea would get this chance."

"I don't find her in the others?"

Circe shakes her head. "It isn't my place to say how the other realities would have gone for you, I have seen them all, and to know of them would break your heart boy. But this is the only one where you established a rapport with my student.

"And, despite her best efforts," Circe says, her smirk audible in her time. "She rather latched onto you like a drowning man to a piece of driftwood."

You smile, but it's a small, almost bitter thing. "It rather hurts to know then, if you saw it all, that this was meant to happen though, all this suffering, this pain."

"You can rage against it, you can scream and you can fight. But the Fates have given us a role to play and it is up to us to perform our parts."

"Didn't you move against fate by coming here to begin with?"

Circe chuckles. "As I said, you can fight, but they wish to tell their story. This War was meant to turn out this way."

"But weren't you meant to be dead?"

Circe says nothing, does nothing as her hands gently move to your shoulders. "You were meant to be dead too, boy. But I wouldn't allow it."

You turn your head back, looking the witch in the face. "... The Church?" you ask.

"Indeed." Circe says quietly, then she pulls you against her, and kisses you gently. No further words pass between you.

—

You had the thought before dinner, namely, that if you were going to be tired. You might as well be truly tired so that you had a chance to truly sleep deeply, and be ready for the next day. And, well, you still had some reserves.

So with that, you pointed to the woman staring at the wall, and focused your magic.

Like a flipped switch, a very heavy switch mind. She changed, the faint slouch disappeared immediately, and she blinked rapidly, the world suddenly coming into focus for her. Green eyes turned, locking onto you, and a grin of rather unnaturally sharp teeth formed. You fall back towards the bed, letting it catch you as you feel just about the last of your magic drain away.

"Tomorrow's the big one eh?" Mordred asks in a voice you hadn't really heard since that day Ayako kidnapped you.

"Yes," you reply. Staring at the woman as she walks over. "Are… I have to ask, are you even aware when you are… well."

Mordred stops short. Her smile fading away to be replaced by a frown. "I'm… it's enough. I know what's going on. But… there are… voices, thoughts, memories. It's… yeah. Things are muddy, unfocused."

You almost say that it sounds unpleasant, but you decide rather rapidly that it would be a dumb thing to say. "We're almost done at least, it's almost over."

"Yeah," Mordred says quietly. Her hand moves to rub at her arm. "I never had a wish, if I did, well. Well I guess it's too late now."

"Whyso?"

Mordred's green eyes flit to you, a faint look of uncertainty on her face. "I had hoped to talk to her."

There is nothing to say to that, so you don't.

"Can you…" Mordred stares at you for a few moments more. "Can you bring the madness back? I don't… like being lucid."

You say nothing, and raise your hand again.

—

Taiga, as she entered your room after dinner looked rather different. You had barely paid attention honestly, your mind mixed with too many thoughts. Too many worries. But she was… definitely different. Namely, because you had never thought you'd see Taiga in a suit of all things. It wasn't a particularly fancy one, just a black suit that was partially opened to reveal her bust… something you had never seen her do before either. But then, the fur jacket on top of it was new as well. You weren't sure if that was meant to be a uniform, or meant to be a threatening statement, but going by the sword at her side, you would assume a threat. You were still mostly bothered by the fact that Taiga was showing cleavage.

You felt like the universe would not allow such things.

Her eyes glanced around the room for a moment before landing on you, her expression was flat, controlled. "Shirou, you doing alright?" she asks, her voice deeper, more controlled.

"As well as I could be… are you doing alright Taiga?"

Taiga stares at you for a few moments. "That's Boss Taiga. I'm your big sister after all."

"I'm… not calling you boss."

"Oh come on!" Taiga whines, her voice back to its normal pitch. "Just a little!?"

"Absolutely not."

Taiga's shoulders slump. "Shirou's still a meanie…"

With a sigh she then walks forward, letting the sword rest by the door as she walks across the room towards you. She comes to a stop just before you, then, without a word, wraps her arms around your neck and pulls you into a hug. You wrap your arms around her without thinking as well, a good minute passing before she slowly separates from you. Her eyes search your face, and a small, simple smile finds its way onto her face. "You grew up fast."

"And you still have-" your remark is cut off by her grabbing your cheek and tugging.

"When a girl is complimenting you, you don't reply with snark." Taiga says, releasing your cheek a second later. "The girls you've got chasing after you are dangerous Shirou. Be careful what you say."

You move a hand to rub at your cheek, glaring at your 'sister'. "I know."

"Apparently not." Taiga replies. "I did my best to raise you but you are so very mean. What would Kiritsugu think?"

"I'm frankly afraid to think about it," you reply. "With how out of control things have gotten."

Taiga looks down to the floor, then she smiles. It's an odd smile on her, almost motherly. "He would be proud of you Shirou."

… Somehow, somehow you have your doubts.

—

It was amusing how some things changed, and how some things… failed to. You were walking around the mansion in the early morning when you spied Sakura leaning against a nearby wall. She was staring out the window, watching as the snow fell in the darkness through the gigantic windows that overlooked the garden. What had changed was the location, what hadn't was the small, yet very genuine smile that found its way onto Sakura's face as you walked up to her.

"Good morning Shirou."

"Morning Sakura, feeling alright?"

Sakura nods, her purple hair shifting around her. "I'm going."

"That wasn't what I asked."

"... And?" Sakura replies, a hint of warning in her tone.

"Fair enough," you reply, not feeling like arguing the point. The steel in her was new, but then… you had always known how strong Sakura was, even if she was a type to rarely speak up. You stare at her for a few moments, before you finally blurt it out. "I'm sorry Sakura."

She tilts her head, staring at me in confusion. "For?"

"I… didn't stop what had happened to you."

Her eyes widen, then her head shakes 'no' so violently you almost worry for the health of her neck. "No, Shirou. Please… no, don't apologize for that." Her hands shoot out, grabbing onto the sleeve of your jacket. "I never told you, but you were always there for me, you… were always there for me Shirou."

You say nothing in response, you simply shift your hands to grasp hers. Her eyes shoot up to you, then she blushes and looks away, smiling softly. "I'll always be there Sakura."

Her fingers dance along your palm. "I know." She says quietly. Then she lets out a squeak as you pull her against you, wrapping your arms around her head and shoulders.

"We're going to get through this, alright?" you say.

Sakura grunts into your shoulder, but the hands moving to clutch at your back tell you enough.

The two of you were going to get through this.

Together.

"You know, technically, you are now the most high ranking Magus in the city. You may be my boss."

You deserved the light punch you got in the chest for that.

—

"I must say, you are a most vexing man." A voice smooth as silk yet as damning as a demon speaks up from behind you.

You don't even bother to look up from where you had been tucking into a breakfast back in your room. Any grand feast was put on hold as everyone was too busy preparing, to that end, you had been given a plate rather roughly by one of the two maids and sent on your way, with a promise from Illya later that she would come by to 'play'.

Regardless, you don't look up as you know the voice, tone, and woman quite well. "Good morning to you as well, Medea."

…

"Good morning." Medea says after a few moments. "Are you quite prepared?"

"As well as I can be," you reply. "My circuits are all in order and the bruises I have are healing nicely." You set the chopsticks down gently, looking up from your plate to stare at the witch now sitting across from you, a flat expression on her unhooded face. "Now, in what manner have I vexed you today?"

"You shall find out in due course."

You blink, then look down at your plate. "Will due course arrive after I finish my eggs?"

"Shirou, this is serious." Caster replies.

"It's poached, not serious." You reply.

"Shirou."

"They are white eggs I suppose," you reply, agreeing with her statement.

"... Were I a lesser woman I would have you tied to the wall and tortured." Caster growls.

"Were I a lesser man I would have left you to bleed out in the park," you look up from your eggs to find Caster smiling at you, you smile back. "Now, what have I done to offend you today?"

"You truly do not understand what you have done, do you Shirou?" Caster asks.

"It's a day that ends in 'y', so yes."

"Circe."

"Yes?"

"She's alive." Medea says flatly.

"I'm… aware of that, yes."

Caster stares at you, saying nothing for several moments. Then she lets out a long, slow, controlled breath. "You misunderstand me Shirou. She is alive. She is no longer a figment of the past, she is no longer a shade retaining form. She is now alive enough that Alaya accepts her existence in this world. She isn't a remnant, she simply is a being from the Age of Gods walking in this time."

… Well that's fairly impressive. "How'd she manage that?"

"She didn't, you did."

Your hunger suddenly fades away as you stare at your servant. "... How?" you manage.

"A Magic of some variety I would imagine, I finally managed to get Circe to speak of it. Though we still do not know all the details. But she is alive." She continues to stare at you for several moments, then she speaks again, her voice barely above a whisper. "As am I."

…

"You aren't a servant anymore?"

Medea shrugs her shoulders. "I am still your servant, but I am also once again a living woman."

"Oh." You reply quietly, not… quite sure what to say to that. "Do you… have any idea… how that happened?"

"Not entirely," Medea replies. "But I am still looking into it, and regardless, we have bigger issues to deal with than your apparently miraculous magecraft."

You nod, "the tower."

"No, the cause of my vexation is the fact that you have impregnated Circe."

You choke on your egg.

—

"Shirou? You okay?" Illya asks, the young girl, adorable in her winter outfit looks up at you as she speaks. "You seem kind of out of it."

You shake your head against the wall you were leaning against. "Just… received a lot of information lately that I'm having to think about."

Illya shuffles where she's standing, putting a finger to her lips. "Good information?"

You open your mouth, close it, think about it, then. "I think so. It's something I'm going to have to deal with once this is all over."

Illya pats your leg, then moves to stand beside you. She looks you over for a moment, then does her best to mimic your posture. "Well you have nothing to worry about because Rider is the strongest servant."

"She is terrifyingly fast." You admit. "I'm rather happy you decided not to kill me with her, I doubt there was much I could do about it."

Illya looks down, her feet kicking against the ground. "... I'm really happy I didn't. Your servants are really weak Shirou."

You snort. "Neither are what I would describe as weak, but certainly neither are as fast, but regardless… I'm happy too, because otherwise I wouldn't have gotten a chance to meet you."

Illya grins broadly, then begins walking down the wall, you follow without a word. Passing by old portraits and paintings of, you assume, ancestral Einzberns. Illya hums softly as she walks, her arms swinging slowly at her side. You turn one corner, then the next, the rooms become less used, slightly, though only slightly, less clean. Until, finally, you enter a large sitting room. A fireplace sits in one corner, abandoned, unused, little more than stains of ash remaining inside of it. The furniture meanwhile is covered up with cloth, protected but unused, and the entire space has a sad air of abandonment to it all. At odds with the rest of the mansion. But you pay little attention to any of that, instead you focus on the portrait sitting proudly on the wall just above one of the couches. It depicts… Illya, and another woman who looks remarkably like her. Long white hair frames a perfect face decorated by ruby eyes. The woman has her arms wrapped around…

"I was really mad at him for a long time." Illya says quietly, staring up at the portrait of Kiritsugu. "Really really angry. When I found out he had run away, he had left, and then adopted you." She barely raises her voice above a whisper, as if afraid someone could hear her here.

A faint whiff of something wafts by you, a mix of perfume, dust, and magic. "But… you were really nice Shirou, but… there's… more to all of this."

She turns her look at you, her red eyes glinting in the darkness. "I was… meant to win this war. I was meant to…" She bites her lip. "It's complicated but, my family, our history. The Einzberns achieved the Third Magic a thousand years ago, and I was supposed to help us obtain that again. I was supposed to win this war."

"I don't think anyone is winning this, not anymore." You reply. "And any wish… any wish that could come of this isn't worth it. Too many people have gotten hurt."

"I was supposed to cross the root." Illya says quietly. "My mother…"

You lower yourself down into a crouch, placing your hand gently on your sister's shoulder. "Illya, I don't care what you were meant to do. What matters is what you want to do, and that you are my sister." You smile. "I just want you to make it out of all of this safe, I want everyone to be safe. I don't want anything else."

Illya's eyes flit to the hand on her shoulder, then to your face. "What would you wish for Shirou?"

"If I got the grail?"

Illya nods.

You let out a slow breath. "My first thought would be 'none of this would have happened', but then, I wouldn't have met you. I wouldn't have met Caster. I wouldn't have saved Sakura." You shake your head. "I would just wish… the damage was reversed, nobody was hurt."

"I was never supposed to have a wish for the Grail." Illya says. "I never really thought about it. I think I would… ask for mother back."

"I would have liked to meet her." You reply. You stare up at the woman in the portrait, her smile was… angelic you suppose you would describe it. Kind, what a mother should look like.

Small hands wrap around your own, and you turn your head to see Illya giving you a brilliant, beautiful, and genuine smile. "This is nice too… I don't want to lose this, not again." Her features harden. "No. I won't."

"Illya?"

Illya stares at you for a few moments, the room as silent as the grave. Then she speaks. "Shirou… I need to speak to Leysritt."

Then she's off running, leaving you crouched in the dark.

… You aren't sure what that's about.

—

Pandemonium, you knew the root of that word now due to Circe. Pan, all, everything, daimonion. Demon. Where all the demons reside, all the flames, all the chaos, all the pain and suffering.

This qualified you think, what had once been downtown was cordoned off and surrounded by a mix of the police force and the military. Spotlights were fixed upon the gargantuan tower… to little effect you note, where the light it, it diffused. Illuminating nothing, as if the dark material of the tower was too dark to be defeated by something as weak as light. But then, there was no sun today. Too much smoke, too many still burning fires choking out the sky. You could no longer see the top of the thing, rising, jutting up into that thick black coiling malaise.

And the city burned.

You were invisible, as was your group as you made your way past the blockades and towards the front of the building. It was… impossibly tall, and even more imposing as you stood before its entrance. Black, wrought gates of a metal that seemingly devoured light loomed before you, they had no handle, no knob, no apparent way to be opened, and they were surrounded by writing written in a flaming language that you couldn't read and was rather painful to look at. You stare at the door for a moment longer, looking around at the group. Taiga was there, though the entourage that had arrived with her yesterday wasn't. You asked her about that, and she said it wasn't anything to apparently worry about. Mata Hari was standing just beside her. Illya was next to her, sitting on Rider's shoulder. Ayako was next, looking rather grateful to be invisible given the getup Ruby continued to force her to wear. Ritsuka, along with Shielder and Luke, she didn't look nervous, or determined, or anything really. She just looked… relaxed. And then there was Sakura, looking rather determined with Archer just beside her.

Flanking you, of course, was Medea, Circe, and Mordred. It was an army, and as you turned your attention back, back to that tower, you truly felt like you needed it. It was an impossible thing, it was a cruel thing, made out of so many jagged spikes and shadows it was like something out of a horror tale. Any courage, any bravery you felt had long since left you. Replaced by only a numb sense of duty and a desire to not have this situation get any worse. To not have anymore lives lost. You were a third rate Magus, you were quite possibly one of the last Magus alive. Your servant was more powerful than you could ever hope to be, and, frankly, you didn't deserve her. Or the support of the people around you.

But you step forward, and push on the door.

… and find yourself looking into the face of a figure as it opens.

—

If you don't vote for her now, she'll come up later, so it's a matter if you want the aid now, or do you want a sudden turn of fortune later on.

[] [It was a girl with an eyepatch, she looked mauled]
She seemed surprised to see you.

[] [A guard]
And thus, the battles began.

___

How'd I do?