Ch. 21
Fencer
Writer
- Location
- 2nd shift
- Pronouns
- He/Him
AN: I bought a taro card deck for this update. I did two drawings. One for John, one for Delia. Delia's fit really well and actually ended on the card I wanted it to end on and that creeped me out. John's…. The past and present needed to be swapped around but both cards work in either order honestly, just swapping them worked better. It ended on, the Emperor. Which ok, the Emperor's meaning isn't a fantastic fit for John's future though it has some vague connotations that fit if you squint, but Palpatine. Palpatine is eventually going to stick his pruned up self right into John's business. I'm done. Fuck this shit I'm out. Enjoy the chapter. Thank Functionality for betaing.
POV: Mace Windu
Glancing around the council chamber I was unsurprised to see and feel the suppressed dread spread when Master Yoda proclaimed. "A new tutorial, Captain Kesel, has released."
Master Yoda gestured with his stick. A small wave of the Force closed the blinds and raised the holo projector from the floor. Apparently, he wanted to see what the captain had done this time and was in no mood to listen to the same tired arguments again.
The holo started with John and Delia sitting cross legged in what appeared at a glance to be a ship's empty cargo room.
"Ok!" The holo image of Captain John Kesel clapped his hands together and rubbed them quickly. "Today's video is… honestly it's a stupid experiment I am not convinced will work, and even if it does, I'm not likely to use it often if ever."
"Ok you've been refusing to explain this for days. What are you doing and why did it have to wait until we got planet side?" Delia asked, frowning.
"This video," Kesel said, seemingly ignoring the question, "is brought to you all by some crazy old fortune teller I met who lived on the edge of a nasty desert that I never want to see again as long as I live." Kesel declared firmly. "Crazy place was absolutely crawling with nasty bugs the size of my boots. Never again." He shuddered. "Today's topic is peering into the future, fortune telling, and prophecy!"
"You told me you suck at looking into the future." Delia said with a raised eyebrow.
"I really do suck at looking into the future." Kesel confirmed.
Delia looked supremely unimpressed.
"Look, I get it, trying to teach something I suck at sounds counterproductive, but we're doing this anyway." Kesel declared.
Delia sighed, shrugged, and muttered, "Alright."
"Ok, so, Jedi basics! The Force can give you nudges in certain directions if you open yourself up to it and basically ask what you should do, or where you should go. But if we are talking the real mystic stuff? Seeing visions? If the Force shows you a vision it could be of the past, present, or a possible future. Be sure you figure out which, before doing anything about it, and remember that the future is ever shifting, visions don't have to come true. They're only a possibility, so ya know, good luck unraveling exactly what the Force is trying to show you and how to respond without screwing yourself unintentionally. Self fulfilling prophecy warning, hooray." Kesel finished dryly.
I could feel the exasperation spread through the council chamber. I couldn't even claim immunity for my response was the same. What he was saying was not incorrect, but the oversimplification of that summary and the flippant delivery tested even Jedi patience.
"Does the Force ever just give a concrete answer about anything?" Delia asked.
"When it tells you to dodge." Kesel quipped. "Anyway, that's your Force vision primer Jedi edition. Half the little Force sects or Force sensitive hermits I've tracked down in out of the way places across the galaxy have at least some kind of technique or ritual meant to help them predict the future."
"It's that common?" Delia asked, surprise evident in voice and expression.
"Everyone wants a peek into the future." Kesel nodded. "How well they work though… Well, none of them ever predicted I'd show up on their doorstep. Anyway, some of those techniques involve props, like rolling bones, or specialized cards, or looking into mirrors, or water, or smoke. Incense is fairly common, ritual prayers or mantras too, and more than half of the methods I've seen require the person trying to get a glimpse of the future to be high as an outgoing star ship."
Kesel stopped talking, let that sink in. Delia slapped a hand over her face. And around the room several of my fellow masters radiated a desire to do the same. Adi Gallia actually muttered a quiet, "Oh dear."
"Is this why you insisted on waiting until we were planet side?" She asked.
"I never fly impaired." Kesel answered. Which would be more respectable if he wasn't so clearly planning something so utterly stupid. "That crazy old desert fortune teller swore by this hallucinogenic cactus juice he would drink before doing a reading. I met a coven of witches that swore by some kind of upper, and a really lonely warlock that declared he could always pierce the veil of time when he drank enough alcohol."
Kesel pulled a box out from behind himself.
"We are going to take all the common elements, make our own ritual, throw ourselves into it like it can't possibly fail, and then after I take something which is legal on this planet I'm going to try a few popular ways to glimpse the future. And for the record no it is not a hallucinogen, details will be in the description. Then I'll sleep off the high while you and R3 get this edited. When I'm sober and thinking clearly I'll record a closing statement, and hopefully declare to the galaxy that I finally pried an actual vision out of the Force." Kesel nodded decisively and handed Delia a sheet of flimsi. Which she began to read.
"John, this sounds dumb."
"That's because it is dumb."
"Then why are you doing this?" Delia demanded a touch sharply.
"Because this is one of the most famous uses of the Force and I've never had any luck with it." Kesel growled. "I've been chasing genuine Force visions for almost as long as I've been out of the temple, Delia. I've never gotten anywhere, not once. Do I think this will work? I'm forcing myself to believe it could, just to give this a better chance of working. If it does work, I may never do it again, but this has been just about the most aggravating entry on my list of Force abilities, and I desperately want to be able to say that even just once, I managed it!"
Delia said nothing. Kesel sat patiently waiting for her response. Around the council chamber a number of the wisest and most venerated Masters of the Force buried their heads in their hands and groaned, grumbled, or cursed at the absurdity of what we were watching, at the fact this particular idiocy might spread, and at the fact we still had no legal recourse by which to put an end to it.
{}{}{}{} Palpatine
Staring at the holo projector I could not decide if this idiocy was amusing or insulting. To see the bumbling oafs flailing attempts at prophecy… The willingness to try anything and everything in pursuit of a goal was almost admirable, but if after a decade of attempts he achieved nothing it was perhaps long past time to give up.
"I'm going to run through a bunch of supposed methods sober first. Then repeat them all high. We'll edit the video so you see results for the same method one after the other. First up is… well a modified Jedi method. The traditional way is to just meditate on the light side of the Force, and if the Force feels like it you might get a vision. I don't have hours to do this, and spending hours on it has never given me a vision before. So, I'm going to spend ten minutes meditating and asking."
"Why are you asking in Mando'a?" Delia asked as she looked over her sheet of flimsi which presumably listed everything out.
"No self respecting mystic chants in galactic basic." John said with false seriousness, then shrugged. "And if anyone in the galaxy has killed more Force users than Mandalorians they've been lost to ancient history. If any language is going to make the Force sit up and take notice it's going to be Mando'a. I just hope my pronunciation isn't too bad. I'm genuinely hoping this works. The last thing I want to do is offend Mandalorian bounty hunters."
Chanting in Mando'a? Doubtful it would be as effective as the language of the Sith, but as a second choice it was at least interesting. Dooku might have been right after all. Letting every fool in the Galaxy throw themselves at the Force using their personal logic might genuinely produce interesting results given enough time and experimentation.
"Before all that let's cover our generic ritual basics." John clapped his hands together and objects began to levitate before him. First was four candles which he lit with a flaming finger and arranged around the pair in a square. Then an incense stick was lit and placed between them. Finally the boy settled into a cross legged sitting position.
"Strictly speaking Jedi don't use candles or incense. But like I said I've tried the Jedi way and gotten nowhere so this is me throwing everything against the wall and hoping something will stick for once." John closed his eyes and began to chant.
"Gedet'ye tengaanar ni te vencuyot. Gedet'ye tengaanar ni te vencuyot. Gedet'ye tengaanar ni te vencuyot."
Abruptly the holo seemed to fritz with static.
"This was boring to watch in person and I'm not making you all sit through it so let's all just fast forward." Delia's voice filled the room. "You're welcome."
The holo snapped back into clarity.
"That's ten minutes, John. Anything?" The girl asked, looking genuinely curious.
"No, you have any luck?" The young man asked in turn.
"Uhhh I wasn't meditating… was I supposed to?" She asked.
The young man blinked.
"I, honestly I just assumed you would try no matter what I said."
The girl blinked.
"I… does that mean I get to try whatever you're taking for the second round of tests?"
"Hell no. It's legal on this planet, but only if you're at least twenty one standard." He hesitated. "Also, I don't know if it affects Mirialan differently… Plus your parents might try to skin me."
The girl huffed.
"Fine, then why don't we do these simultaneously." She waved the sheet of flimsi. "Control and altered mental state at the same time."
"…. Yeah, alright, that would be faster." The young man shrugged then pulled a small cube from his pocket and eyed it dubiously. "But if we're doing this, I'm not using the Dark Side. No way I'm risking playing with the Dark Side while high. Are you up for doing those tests? Or should we skip those altogether?"
The girl hesitated.
"I'll try. But let's take it one at a time. I'll tap out if I think I'm losing my focus." The girl offered.
"Alright then." The fool captain tossed the cube of something in his mouth chewed and swallowed. "Guess now we wait."
Was watching this really a productive use of my time…
"Droid!" I snapped.
"Yes, sir?" The modified protocol droid ambled over.
"Watch this holo recording. I want a summary of any success they might achieve in looking to the future. Otherwise report their failure when the recording is completed."
"Yes, sir." The droid took my place before the holo projector.
Good. The Senate still demanded much attention and there was only so much amusement to be found in watching this fool flail about.
{}{}{}{} Ahsoka
This… wasn't going to work, right? The Masters didn't really talk about drugs except to say criminals sell them to make money and that they're bad for us. This shouldn't work. Delia didn't seem to think so anyway. Not with how she was looking at John. John didn't even seem convinced.
"How you feeling, John." Delia asked, looking mildly concerned as John swayed a little in place where he sat.
"...Floaty… and slow… and like my body is faster than my brain… I don't hate it… But I'm not loving it either… What was the chant again?"
"Gedet'ye tengaanar ni te vencuyot, boss. It means 'please show me the future, roughly."
"Right, thank you, R3." John nodded. "Got to thank Anakin again for making you double as an interpreter."
They made an astromech double as an interpreter? And as a recording device… did they make it do anything else?
"Right, ready oh student, slash assistant, slash tech person mine?" John asked, swaying more.
"...Yeah you're high." Delia declared looking highly unimpressed.
"Mmm. Gedet'ye tengaanar ni te vencuyot. Gedet'ye tengaanar ni te vencuyot. Gedet'ye tengaanar ni te vencuyot."
The holo fritzed again. As it sped up.
"Spoiler alert folks, there's going to be… a lot of this." Delia sounded disappointed.
"Time, boss!" The translating, recording, astromech announced.
"I got nothing." Delia said.
"Same." John sighed. "Right, we tried asking politely now we're going to demand. R3, What was that other chant I asked you for?"
"Tengaanar ni te vencuyot haar'chak! Which roughly translates as; show me future damn it!" The astromech cheerfully answered.
"Great. Now we're teaching kids to swear in Mando'a. Great job John." Delia sighed.
"…Meh." John answered. "Alright, meant to try this one with the… Dark Side… not doing that like this. You try that way I'll try with the Light. Don't… just go easy. Maybe just a little annoyance. Stop if… ergh, stop as soon as it starts to feel frustrating… can't, I'm not great back up right now."
That didn't sound super safe, or smart.
"Right, ok, nice and easy." Delia took a breath. "Ready."
"Tengaanar ni te vencuyot haar'chak. Tengaanar ni te vencuyot haar'chak. Tengaanar ni te vencuyot haar'chak."
The holo fritzed again.
"I am an awesome slicer and programmer. Video editing is beneath me and John can absolutely do this himself next time…. To be fair he really isn't in any shape to edit this himself right now, but it could have waited until tomorrow. When he sleeps this off." The image went back to normal.
"Not doing that again soon." Delia spoke first.
"Started slipping?" John asked.
"No… but it was a lot harder to keep myself steady than I expected. More candle meditation for me I guess."
"Hmm, good job. Need to know your limits. Proud you aren't pushing." John smiled, but he definitely didn't look all there. Like someone stuck halfway asleep in a good dream. "Didn't see anything… you?"
"Nothing. Are you sure any of this is going to work?" Delia asked.
"Less sure by the minute!" John said cheerily. "Wasn't even sure to begin with!"
"Then why are we trying this?" Delia demanded
"Outa ideas." John shrugged. "Can make fire and lightning dance in my hand, float stuff round and round, dodge blaster fire blind. But I can't even see tomorrow's lunch? Figured out other abilities in months even if I'm still mastering them. But a decade got me nowhere with this. Maybe I'm no good at this? Maybe Force don wanna tell me stuff. Maybe I'm not good enough for it."
John's expression fell.
"Got to try, Delia, nuthin else worked. Wasn't good enough for the order, but always thought I was good enough for the Force. Got away from the temple, got off Coruscant, found so many Force users ouside the temple, didn't get killed." John shook his head.
"Luck's not enough. S'will ah the Force, got to be. But this? Nuthing. Got to try it, got to be good enough."
Oh… oh. Maybe it was just all the talk among the initiates. Or maybe it was trying to be the perfect padawan, but I got that. Just a little. I… I didn't like trying to be calm all the time. It messed me up in saber practice, and it wasn't fun, and why did I need to change? What was bad about fun?
This was like that. He didn't care if the Masters were proud, but he wanted the Force to be proud of him? Could the Force be proud? Or did he just want it to show him it was paying attention to him? Could the Force pay attention to us? Urgh, why was a video explaining the Force giving me more questions about the Force?!
{}{}{}{} Obi-Wan Kenobi
And so the testing went. Failure upon failure until both John and Delia were visibly struggling to continue. Energy and enthusiasm drained away by the minute. It was… odd. The mentality among the Order was that visions came or did not. Some beings are predisposed to them and many are not. It was fairly common for a Jedi to receive some sort of guidance from the Force but true visions were far less common. The idea that such visions could be demanded from the Force at any time with success was not something I'd encountered among the Order.
This long string of failures was not challenging my understanding of Force visions in the least. If anything this only highlighted that they cannot be demanded.
John flopped onto his back dramatically after lighting a new incense stick.
"Was there anything else left on the list Delia?" John asked dejectedly. "Honestly, can't remember."
"One more." Delia sighed as she pushed away a bowl full of water they had attempted to use for scrying and reached into a nearby bag to pull out an oversized deck of cards.
"Behold," Delia deadpanned, "the cards know all. They can tell you your past, your present, and your future. So long as you have the instructions on hand to decipher them." She held up several sheets of flimsi and waved them gently.
Delia took a moment to read over the sheet, raised a disbelieving eyebrow, kept reading for another few minutes then sighed.
"Ok, so, I don't have the patience to do any of the complicated stuff." She waved several pages. "But the simple versions aren't all that complicated. There's a whole list of suggestions on how to tune the deck to it's owner and cleanse it between uses and that's all… sort of interesting and if this works even a little it might be worth following up on but for now…" Delia held the deck horizontally between her hands and closed her eyes. After a moment the deck seemed to shift ever so slightly. First up a hair, then side to side, then the cards began to lazily spin over the palm of her hand. She stayed like that for perhaps half a minute before the cards settled and she let out a breath.
"Alright step one, be clear about what you're asking." Delia stared at the cards and spoke firmly. "I'm not asking for a lot. Just give me a basic overview. Three cards. Past, present, future, that describe my life, that describe me. That's all I want right now. I just want some kind of proof that the Force really can answer when we ask questions like this. Because blast it all, I'm with John on this one, something should have worked by now."
With another deep breath Delia started to shuffle. Only to suddenly freeze. As she froze John snapped to attention. Clarity breaking through his impairment.
"Tell me you felt that." John asked. "I don't know what I just felt, but I felt something."
Delia licked her lips eyeing the deck of cards like they had been replaced with a thermal detonator.
"I felt it. It was like the Force was telling me to stop."
"Stop like put the deck down this is a terrible idea? Or stop shuffling and pick your cards."
"Stop shuffling and pick your cards." Delia answered as she set the deck down in front of herself. Slowly card by card she pushed the top of the deck from her left hand to her right, working through the deck until with another jolt she froze, cut the deck and repeated the process. She stared down at the three unequal piles of cards and swallowed. Reached for them and rearranged their order until she seemed satisfied. Then she flipped the top card of each pile.
"It's like the Force is humming." John muttered quietly.
Delia nodded and reached for the sheets of flimsi which presumably held the instructions on how to properly read the cards. The image zoomed in on the cards. All three were depicted dramatic drawings in black and white. Simple black strokes on a white background creating dramatic images.
The first card in her spread showed an elderly human with her hair up in a bun, eyes closed savoring the scent of flowers which were for some inexplicable reason planted in nine cups. The second card showed an aged hand reaching out to a younger hand. The aged hand included the silhouette of a walking family the young hand a simple depiction of a homestead or farm. The two hands were also connected by a set of stairs and a tree and its roots. Ten five pointed stars within circles hung from the branches of the tree. The final card was the most dramatic. A gnarled tree growing on the edge of cliff, a clearly damaged if not collapsing house among its branches. Lightning flashes in the background as one figure, a woman, falls into the abyss as the figure of a man desperately clings to branch with one hand.
"Nine of Cups for my past, Ten of Pentacles for my present, and The Tower for my future." Delia spoke looking at the flimsi explanations very dubiously indeed.
"So, Nine of Cups, also known as the wish card. What you wished for may well come to pass, but as with any wish, make sure you've chosen wisely. As the saying goes, be careful what you wish for, you just might get it. Make sure it is a wish that is truly worth having, lest your wish instead become a lesson to learn from." Delia read.
"You wanted to learn to use the Force, and then you found me." John muttered. Delia nodded and continued.
"Ten of Pentacles has at its core the concept of legacy and the impenetrable familial ties that bind. Therefore, when it appears in your reading, it indicates a renewed focus on these values at this time. The heritage of wisdom is our most valuable gift from our ancestors, sustaining us through times of trial and adversity. And just as it was passed down to you, either directly through your family line, or sometimes through your "extended family" of friends and respected elders, so too, must you pass down what you have learned to the next generation."
Delia now looked unnerved.
"I'm learning from you, everything I need to know about the Force, but also about how to live and thrive as a spacer, and I'm already helping to teach even more people."
John nodded thoughtfully.
"Last card, my future, The Tower. It is a card that augers a time for drastic transformations that will force you to move out of your comfort zone. The one who stays constant in the sea of change is your true nature; see that you nourish, safeguard, and keep it well." Delia looked incredibly unnerved. "It lists possible examples as things like losing your house or being forced to move. It's not a happy card. But apparently it doesn't have to be the worst."
"Very dramatic, classic prophecy ending right there." John nodded. "Also really vague."
Delia glared and reshuffled the deck before passing it to John.
"Your turn then. Meditate on the deck, run the Force through it. Ask it your question, shuffle, then cut the deck and flip the top cards."
John nodded absently and repeated Delia's process, even asking the same question before laying out his three cards. Even with his eyes closed with every card he flips his grin goes wider and Delia sat straighter. Clearly the pair could feel the Force moving about them.
The first depicts a woman casually dropping a filled cup on the ground as she confidently walks away from seven other cups and a run down home. The second depicts a woman reaching towards the night sky where one star shines far brighter than the rest. The last card depicts a bearded man seated in a throne holding an orb, the man has goat horns curling out of his head.
Delia hummed thoughtfully.
"First card is the eight of cups. The Card of moving on from a situation or place that is no longer bringing you joy. It's the start of a new journey, one that will not be easy since you're starting from scratch. Nonetheless, it can be an interesting one, full of new possibilities. Whether it's an actual trip or an inner journey is for you to decide. One thing is for sure, an old cycle is closing and a new one is beginning."
John whistled through his teeth and Delia nodded.
"Yeah, that fits your past like a glove. Ok second card you're present, The Star. The journey was long and arduous, and through it all, the wanderer has encountered many obstacles and setbacks. Still, their inner drive has proven resolute and has never waned. Throughout their journey, they have relied on the constant presence that has guided them home, the Star. It is ever present, ever faithful, a silent friend in the endless sky. The Star nourishes and feed hope. Now safe at last from the perils that once threatened their existence they reach out in gratitude."
John blinked dumbly.
"If you substitute 'the star' with 'the Force'... that's actually kind of scary accurate." He muttered.
"Well, it's supposed to be about hope for the future, so I guess that's one way to say 'stay the course.'" Delia eyed the cards warily before flipping through her guide once more.
"Last card, your future, The Emperor. Ok there's a lot of stuff here talking about the guy himself, but… right here we go. If the Emperor appears in your reading, seek to determine if he represents the reader or someone else. He typically represents a man of great influence and reach. This card can also signal important changes or events that are about to unfold. In a positive reading the Emperor represents stability." Delia eyed the final card dubiously.
"Do you think it means your videos are going to go mainstream and you'll have a ton of influence?" She asked.
"... No. I mean I guess it could mean that, but I don't think it's about me. More like someone who's going to have an impact on my life down the line. It feels… distant."
Delia eyed John dubiously but shrugged.
"Ok."
John grinned at her.
"We got a peek at the past, the present, and probably the future." The captain's tone was incredibly smug.
Delia laughed weakly.
"Not sure I want any upheaval in my future, but that was definitely something." She admitted.
John collapsed backwards onto the deck.
"Heh, finally got something out of the Force. Finally!" He threw his hands up into the air. "I don't know if that's just the method that decided to work best for us or if it's all the time we put into this finally forced a response and I don't really care. It kriffing worked!"
Delia shook her head.
"Yeah, yeah it did." Delia shook her head. "Think it's time for you to go sleep this off now. I'll get this edited and posted."
"Yeah, yeah that sounds good. Goodnight galaxy, you've been a wonderful audience!" John's subdued cackles and the sight of Delia standing up cut to black as the recording ended.
Sitting back I tried and failed to calm my racing thoughts. That shouldn't have worked at all. But… But it seemed to. At least somewhat at any rate. The cards depicting the future were incredibly vague especially with John's comment that he felt it was about someone else. But even still the cards depicting past and present seemed to fit. Was it only chance… or did the Force truly answer their request through a deck of artistic cards?
{}{}{}{} Ahsoka
The cards were a little scary looking, but if they actually worked… maybe I could print out a set? Maybe ones with less scary, prettier pictures?
{}{}{}{} Palpatine
The Emperor. Hah. The fool had no idea did he? Truly even the predictions of other Force users heralded my ascension. And why should they not? Already I worked to turn the fool Captain's efforts to my own gain. And in time, oh yes. In time I would exact payment for the chaos he saw fit to unleash on the galaxy. It would make my rise to power more complicated but even this chaos could not stop my rise to ultimate power. Not now.
{}{}{}{} Windu
Sighing I massaged the bridge of my nose. The other Masters looked and felt equally vexed and exasperated through the Force.
"We should probably discuss the ramifications." Oppo Rancisis spoke quietly into the silent room.
With a deep sigh I stood.
"No. The repercussions are obvious. Across the galaxy many beings will attempt similar things and similar decks of cards will experience a swell in popularity. Forgive me, but I haven't the patience for another lengthy debate about the captain, his videos, or the changes his lessons will bring. I need to meditate and clear my head. I suspect many of us could benefit from a few hours of meditation. Let this insanity lie, if not forever, then at least for a few days."
Around the room many of the others nodded agreement and without further words the meeting came to an end. Sighing I slumped back into my chair. Eventually only Master Yoda and I remained.
"The young Captain, determined he is, if nothing else." The Grand Master spoke, tapping his stick against his seat.
"Yes." I admitted. "Though we already knew that."
Yoda only hummed thoughtfully.
"Unsettling it is, to see methods I would dismiss, work."
"Indeed. That is the thing that bothers me most in this. It wasn't clear or detailed or even terribly helpful. But that it worked at all…" I sighed. "Forgive me Master Yoda, but I really do feel the need to meditate." I stood to leave.
"As do I." The aged master admitted as he too rose. "But first, to the cafeteria, I will go. In need of stronger tea, I am."
My lips twisted up into a brief grin as I left the room. Tea. I was tempted to find something significantly stronger than tea.
POV: Mace Windu
Glancing around the council chamber I was unsurprised to see and feel the suppressed dread spread when Master Yoda proclaimed. "A new tutorial, Captain Kesel, has released."
Master Yoda gestured with his stick. A small wave of the Force closed the blinds and raised the holo projector from the floor. Apparently, he wanted to see what the captain had done this time and was in no mood to listen to the same tired arguments again.
The holo started with John and Delia sitting cross legged in what appeared at a glance to be a ship's empty cargo room.
"Ok!" The holo image of Captain John Kesel clapped his hands together and rubbed them quickly. "Today's video is… honestly it's a stupid experiment I am not convinced will work, and even if it does, I'm not likely to use it often if ever."
"Ok you've been refusing to explain this for days. What are you doing and why did it have to wait until we got planet side?" Delia asked, frowning.
"This video," Kesel said, seemingly ignoring the question, "is brought to you all by some crazy old fortune teller I met who lived on the edge of a nasty desert that I never want to see again as long as I live." Kesel declared firmly. "Crazy place was absolutely crawling with nasty bugs the size of my boots. Never again." He shuddered. "Today's topic is peering into the future, fortune telling, and prophecy!"
"You told me you suck at looking into the future." Delia said with a raised eyebrow.
"I really do suck at looking into the future." Kesel confirmed.
Delia looked supremely unimpressed.
"Look, I get it, trying to teach something I suck at sounds counterproductive, but we're doing this anyway." Kesel declared.
Delia sighed, shrugged, and muttered, "Alright."
"Ok, so, Jedi basics! The Force can give you nudges in certain directions if you open yourself up to it and basically ask what you should do, or where you should go. But if we are talking the real mystic stuff? Seeing visions? If the Force shows you a vision it could be of the past, present, or a possible future. Be sure you figure out which, before doing anything about it, and remember that the future is ever shifting, visions don't have to come true. They're only a possibility, so ya know, good luck unraveling exactly what the Force is trying to show you and how to respond without screwing yourself unintentionally. Self fulfilling prophecy warning, hooray." Kesel finished dryly.
I could feel the exasperation spread through the council chamber. I couldn't even claim immunity for my response was the same. What he was saying was not incorrect, but the oversimplification of that summary and the flippant delivery tested even Jedi patience.
"Does the Force ever just give a concrete answer about anything?" Delia asked.
"When it tells you to dodge." Kesel quipped. "Anyway, that's your Force vision primer Jedi edition. Half the little Force sects or Force sensitive hermits I've tracked down in out of the way places across the galaxy have at least some kind of technique or ritual meant to help them predict the future."
"It's that common?" Delia asked, surprise evident in voice and expression.
"Everyone wants a peek into the future." Kesel nodded. "How well they work though… Well, none of them ever predicted I'd show up on their doorstep. Anyway, some of those techniques involve props, like rolling bones, or specialized cards, or looking into mirrors, or water, or smoke. Incense is fairly common, ritual prayers or mantras too, and more than half of the methods I've seen require the person trying to get a glimpse of the future to be high as an outgoing star ship."
Kesel stopped talking, let that sink in. Delia slapped a hand over her face. And around the room several of my fellow masters radiated a desire to do the same. Adi Gallia actually muttered a quiet, "Oh dear."
"Is this why you insisted on waiting until we were planet side?" She asked.
"I never fly impaired." Kesel answered. Which would be more respectable if he wasn't so clearly planning something so utterly stupid. "That crazy old desert fortune teller swore by this hallucinogenic cactus juice he would drink before doing a reading. I met a coven of witches that swore by some kind of upper, and a really lonely warlock that declared he could always pierce the veil of time when he drank enough alcohol."
Kesel pulled a box out from behind himself.
"We are going to take all the common elements, make our own ritual, throw ourselves into it like it can't possibly fail, and then after I take something which is legal on this planet I'm going to try a few popular ways to glimpse the future. And for the record no it is not a hallucinogen, details will be in the description. Then I'll sleep off the high while you and R3 get this edited. When I'm sober and thinking clearly I'll record a closing statement, and hopefully declare to the galaxy that I finally pried an actual vision out of the Force." Kesel nodded decisively and handed Delia a sheet of flimsi. Which she began to read.
"John, this sounds dumb."
"That's because it is dumb."
"Then why are you doing this?" Delia demanded a touch sharply.
"Because this is one of the most famous uses of the Force and I've never had any luck with it." Kesel growled. "I've been chasing genuine Force visions for almost as long as I've been out of the temple, Delia. I've never gotten anywhere, not once. Do I think this will work? I'm forcing myself to believe it could, just to give this a better chance of working. If it does work, I may never do it again, but this has been just about the most aggravating entry on my list of Force abilities, and I desperately want to be able to say that even just once, I managed it!"
Delia said nothing. Kesel sat patiently waiting for her response. Around the council chamber a number of the wisest and most venerated Masters of the Force buried their heads in their hands and groaned, grumbled, or cursed at the absurdity of what we were watching, at the fact this particular idiocy might spread, and at the fact we still had no legal recourse by which to put an end to it.
{}{}{}{} Palpatine
Staring at the holo projector I could not decide if this idiocy was amusing or insulting. To see the bumbling oafs flailing attempts at prophecy… The willingness to try anything and everything in pursuit of a goal was almost admirable, but if after a decade of attempts he achieved nothing it was perhaps long past time to give up.
"I'm going to run through a bunch of supposed methods sober first. Then repeat them all high. We'll edit the video so you see results for the same method one after the other. First up is… well a modified Jedi method. The traditional way is to just meditate on the light side of the Force, and if the Force feels like it you might get a vision. I don't have hours to do this, and spending hours on it has never given me a vision before. So, I'm going to spend ten minutes meditating and asking."
"Why are you asking in Mando'a?" Delia asked as she looked over her sheet of flimsi which presumably listed everything out.
"No self respecting mystic chants in galactic basic." John said with false seriousness, then shrugged. "And if anyone in the galaxy has killed more Force users than Mandalorians they've been lost to ancient history. If any language is going to make the Force sit up and take notice it's going to be Mando'a. I just hope my pronunciation isn't too bad. I'm genuinely hoping this works. The last thing I want to do is offend Mandalorian bounty hunters."
Chanting in Mando'a? Doubtful it would be as effective as the language of the Sith, but as a second choice it was at least interesting. Dooku might have been right after all. Letting every fool in the Galaxy throw themselves at the Force using their personal logic might genuinely produce interesting results given enough time and experimentation.
"Before all that let's cover our generic ritual basics." John clapped his hands together and objects began to levitate before him. First was four candles which he lit with a flaming finger and arranged around the pair in a square. Then an incense stick was lit and placed between them. Finally the boy settled into a cross legged sitting position.
"Strictly speaking Jedi don't use candles or incense. But like I said I've tried the Jedi way and gotten nowhere so this is me throwing everything against the wall and hoping something will stick for once." John closed his eyes and began to chant.
"Gedet'ye tengaanar ni te vencuyot. Gedet'ye tengaanar ni te vencuyot. Gedet'ye tengaanar ni te vencuyot."
Abruptly the holo seemed to fritz with static.
"This was boring to watch in person and I'm not making you all sit through it so let's all just fast forward." Delia's voice filled the room. "You're welcome."
The holo snapped back into clarity.
"That's ten minutes, John. Anything?" The girl asked, looking genuinely curious.
"No, you have any luck?" The young man asked in turn.
"Uhhh I wasn't meditating… was I supposed to?" She asked.
The young man blinked.
"I, honestly I just assumed you would try no matter what I said."
The girl blinked.
"I… does that mean I get to try whatever you're taking for the second round of tests?"
"Hell no. It's legal on this planet, but only if you're at least twenty one standard." He hesitated. "Also, I don't know if it affects Mirialan differently… Plus your parents might try to skin me."
The girl huffed.
"Fine, then why don't we do these simultaneously." She waved the sheet of flimsi. "Control and altered mental state at the same time."
"…. Yeah, alright, that would be faster." The young man shrugged then pulled a small cube from his pocket and eyed it dubiously. "But if we're doing this, I'm not using the Dark Side. No way I'm risking playing with the Dark Side while high. Are you up for doing those tests? Or should we skip those altogether?"
The girl hesitated.
"I'll try. But let's take it one at a time. I'll tap out if I think I'm losing my focus." The girl offered.
"Alright then." The fool captain tossed the cube of something in his mouth chewed and swallowed. "Guess now we wait."
Was watching this really a productive use of my time…
"Droid!" I snapped.
"Yes, sir?" The modified protocol droid ambled over.
"Watch this holo recording. I want a summary of any success they might achieve in looking to the future. Otherwise report their failure when the recording is completed."
"Yes, sir." The droid took my place before the holo projector.
Good. The Senate still demanded much attention and there was only so much amusement to be found in watching this fool flail about.
{}{}{}{} Ahsoka
This… wasn't going to work, right? The Masters didn't really talk about drugs except to say criminals sell them to make money and that they're bad for us. This shouldn't work. Delia didn't seem to think so anyway. Not with how she was looking at John. John didn't even seem convinced.
"How you feeling, John." Delia asked, looking mildly concerned as John swayed a little in place where he sat.
"...Floaty… and slow… and like my body is faster than my brain… I don't hate it… But I'm not loving it either… What was the chant again?"
"Gedet'ye tengaanar ni te vencuyot, boss. It means 'please show me the future, roughly."
"Right, thank you, R3." John nodded. "Got to thank Anakin again for making you double as an interpreter."
They made an astromech double as an interpreter? And as a recording device… did they make it do anything else?
"Right, ready oh student, slash assistant, slash tech person mine?" John asked, swaying more.
"...Yeah you're high." Delia declared looking highly unimpressed.
"Mmm. Gedet'ye tengaanar ni te vencuyot. Gedet'ye tengaanar ni te vencuyot. Gedet'ye tengaanar ni te vencuyot."
The holo fritzed again. As it sped up.
"Spoiler alert folks, there's going to be… a lot of this." Delia sounded disappointed.
"Time, boss!" The translating, recording, astromech announced.
"I got nothing." Delia said.
"Same." John sighed. "Right, we tried asking politely now we're going to demand. R3, What was that other chant I asked you for?"
"Tengaanar ni te vencuyot haar'chak! Which roughly translates as; show me future damn it!" The astromech cheerfully answered.
"Great. Now we're teaching kids to swear in Mando'a. Great job John." Delia sighed.
"…Meh." John answered. "Alright, meant to try this one with the… Dark Side… not doing that like this. You try that way I'll try with the Light. Don't… just go easy. Maybe just a little annoyance. Stop if… ergh, stop as soon as it starts to feel frustrating… can't, I'm not great back up right now."
That didn't sound super safe, or smart.
"Right, ok, nice and easy." Delia took a breath. "Ready."
"Tengaanar ni te vencuyot haar'chak. Tengaanar ni te vencuyot haar'chak. Tengaanar ni te vencuyot haar'chak."
The holo fritzed again.
"I am an awesome slicer and programmer. Video editing is beneath me and John can absolutely do this himself next time…. To be fair he really isn't in any shape to edit this himself right now, but it could have waited until tomorrow. When he sleeps this off." The image went back to normal.
"Not doing that again soon." Delia spoke first.
"Started slipping?" John asked.
"No… but it was a lot harder to keep myself steady than I expected. More candle meditation for me I guess."
"Hmm, good job. Need to know your limits. Proud you aren't pushing." John smiled, but he definitely didn't look all there. Like someone stuck halfway asleep in a good dream. "Didn't see anything… you?"
"Nothing. Are you sure any of this is going to work?" Delia asked.
"Less sure by the minute!" John said cheerily. "Wasn't even sure to begin with!"
"Then why are we trying this?" Delia demanded
"Outa ideas." John shrugged. "Can make fire and lightning dance in my hand, float stuff round and round, dodge blaster fire blind. But I can't even see tomorrow's lunch? Figured out other abilities in months even if I'm still mastering them. But a decade got me nowhere with this. Maybe I'm no good at this? Maybe Force don wanna tell me stuff. Maybe I'm not good enough for it."
John's expression fell.
"Got to try, Delia, nuthin else worked. Wasn't good enough for the order, but always thought I was good enough for the Force. Got away from the temple, got off Coruscant, found so many Force users ouside the temple, didn't get killed." John shook his head.
"Luck's not enough. S'will ah the Force, got to be. But this? Nuthing. Got to try it, got to be good enough."
Oh… oh. Maybe it was just all the talk among the initiates. Or maybe it was trying to be the perfect padawan, but I got that. Just a little. I… I didn't like trying to be calm all the time. It messed me up in saber practice, and it wasn't fun, and why did I need to change? What was bad about fun?
This was like that. He didn't care if the Masters were proud, but he wanted the Force to be proud of him? Could the Force be proud? Or did he just want it to show him it was paying attention to him? Could the Force pay attention to us? Urgh, why was a video explaining the Force giving me more questions about the Force?!
{}{}{}{} Obi-Wan Kenobi
And so the testing went. Failure upon failure until both John and Delia were visibly struggling to continue. Energy and enthusiasm drained away by the minute. It was… odd. The mentality among the Order was that visions came or did not. Some beings are predisposed to them and many are not. It was fairly common for a Jedi to receive some sort of guidance from the Force but true visions were far less common. The idea that such visions could be demanded from the Force at any time with success was not something I'd encountered among the Order.
This long string of failures was not challenging my understanding of Force visions in the least. If anything this only highlighted that they cannot be demanded.
John flopped onto his back dramatically after lighting a new incense stick.
"Was there anything else left on the list Delia?" John asked dejectedly. "Honestly, can't remember."
"One more." Delia sighed as she pushed away a bowl full of water they had attempted to use for scrying and reached into a nearby bag to pull out an oversized deck of cards.
"Behold," Delia deadpanned, "the cards know all. They can tell you your past, your present, and your future. So long as you have the instructions on hand to decipher them." She held up several sheets of flimsi and waved them gently.
Delia took a moment to read over the sheet, raised a disbelieving eyebrow, kept reading for another few minutes then sighed.
"Ok, so, I don't have the patience to do any of the complicated stuff." She waved several pages. "But the simple versions aren't all that complicated. There's a whole list of suggestions on how to tune the deck to it's owner and cleanse it between uses and that's all… sort of interesting and if this works even a little it might be worth following up on but for now…" Delia held the deck horizontally between her hands and closed her eyes. After a moment the deck seemed to shift ever so slightly. First up a hair, then side to side, then the cards began to lazily spin over the palm of her hand. She stayed like that for perhaps half a minute before the cards settled and she let out a breath.
"Alright step one, be clear about what you're asking." Delia stared at the cards and spoke firmly. "I'm not asking for a lot. Just give me a basic overview. Three cards. Past, present, future, that describe my life, that describe me. That's all I want right now. I just want some kind of proof that the Force really can answer when we ask questions like this. Because blast it all, I'm with John on this one, something should have worked by now."
With another deep breath Delia started to shuffle. Only to suddenly freeze. As she froze John snapped to attention. Clarity breaking through his impairment.
"Tell me you felt that." John asked. "I don't know what I just felt, but I felt something."
Delia licked her lips eyeing the deck of cards like they had been replaced with a thermal detonator.
"I felt it. It was like the Force was telling me to stop."
"Stop like put the deck down this is a terrible idea? Or stop shuffling and pick your cards."
"Stop shuffling and pick your cards." Delia answered as she set the deck down in front of herself. Slowly card by card she pushed the top of the deck from her left hand to her right, working through the deck until with another jolt she froze, cut the deck and repeated the process. She stared down at the three unequal piles of cards and swallowed. Reached for them and rearranged their order until she seemed satisfied. Then she flipped the top card of each pile.
"It's like the Force is humming." John muttered quietly.
Delia nodded and reached for the sheets of flimsi which presumably held the instructions on how to properly read the cards. The image zoomed in on the cards. All three were depicted dramatic drawings in black and white. Simple black strokes on a white background creating dramatic images.
The first card in her spread showed an elderly human with her hair up in a bun, eyes closed savoring the scent of flowers which were for some inexplicable reason planted in nine cups. The second card showed an aged hand reaching out to a younger hand. The aged hand included the silhouette of a walking family the young hand a simple depiction of a homestead or farm. The two hands were also connected by a set of stairs and a tree and its roots. Ten five pointed stars within circles hung from the branches of the tree. The final card was the most dramatic. A gnarled tree growing on the edge of cliff, a clearly damaged if not collapsing house among its branches. Lightning flashes in the background as one figure, a woman, falls into the abyss as the figure of a man desperately clings to branch with one hand.
"Nine of Cups for my past, Ten of Pentacles for my present, and The Tower for my future." Delia spoke looking at the flimsi explanations very dubiously indeed.
"So, Nine of Cups, also known as the wish card. What you wished for may well come to pass, but as with any wish, make sure you've chosen wisely. As the saying goes, be careful what you wish for, you just might get it. Make sure it is a wish that is truly worth having, lest your wish instead become a lesson to learn from." Delia read.
"You wanted to learn to use the Force, and then you found me." John muttered. Delia nodded and continued.
"Ten of Pentacles has at its core the concept of legacy and the impenetrable familial ties that bind. Therefore, when it appears in your reading, it indicates a renewed focus on these values at this time. The heritage of wisdom is our most valuable gift from our ancestors, sustaining us through times of trial and adversity. And just as it was passed down to you, either directly through your family line, or sometimes through your "extended family" of friends and respected elders, so too, must you pass down what you have learned to the next generation."
Delia now looked unnerved.
"I'm learning from you, everything I need to know about the Force, but also about how to live and thrive as a spacer, and I'm already helping to teach even more people."
John nodded thoughtfully.
"Last card, my future, The Tower. It is a card that augers a time for drastic transformations that will force you to move out of your comfort zone. The one who stays constant in the sea of change is your true nature; see that you nourish, safeguard, and keep it well." Delia looked incredibly unnerved. "It lists possible examples as things like losing your house or being forced to move. It's not a happy card. But apparently it doesn't have to be the worst."
"Very dramatic, classic prophecy ending right there." John nodded. "Also really vague."
Delia glared and reshuffled the deck before passing it to John.
"Your turn then. Meditate on the deck, run the Force through it. Ask it your question, shuffle, then cut the deck and flip the top cards."
John nodded absently and repeated Delia's process, even asking the same question before laying out his three cards. Even with his eyes closed with every card he flips his grin goes wider and Delia sat straighter. Clearly the pair could feel the Force moving about them.
The first depicts a woman casually dropping a filled cup on the ground as she confidently walks away from seven other cups and a run down home. The second depicts a woman reaching towards the night sky where one star shines far brighter than the rest. The last card depicts a bearded man seated in a throne holding an orb, the man has goat horns curling out of his head.
Delia hummed thoughtfully.
"First card is the eight of cups. The Card of moving on from a situation or place that is no longer bringing you joy. It's the start of a new journey, one that will not be easy since you're starting from scratch. Nonetheless, it can be an interesting one, full of new possibilities. Whether it's an actual trip or an inner journey is for you to decide. One thing is for sure, an old cycle is closing and a new one is beginning."
John whistled through his teeth and Delia nodded.
"Yeah, that fits your past like a glove. Ok second card you're present, The Star. The journey was long and arduous, and through it all, the wanderer has encountered many obstacles and setbacks. Still, their inner drive has proven resolute and has never waned. Throughout their journey, they have relied on the constant presence that has guided them home, the Star. It is ever present, ever faithful, a silent friend in the endless sky. The Star nourishes and feed hope. Now safe at last from the perils that once threatened their existence they reach out in gratitude."
John blinked dumbly.
"If you substitute 'the star' with 'the Force'... that's actually kind of scary accurate." He muttered.
"Well, it's supposed to be about hope for the future, so I guess that's one way to say 'stay the course.'" Delia eyed the cards warily before flipping through her guide once more.
"Last card, your future, The Emperor. Ok there's a lot of stuff here talking about the guy himself, but… right here we go. If the Emperor appears in your reading, seek to determine if he represents the reader or someone else. He typically represents a man of great influence and reach. This card can also signal important changes or events that are about to unfold. In a positive reading the Emperor represents stability." Delia eyed the final card dubiously.
"Do you think it means your videos are going to go mainstream and you'll have a ton of influence?" She asked.
"... No. I mean I guess it could mean that, but I don't think it's about me. More like someone who's going to have an impact on my life down the line. It feels… distant."
Delia eyed John dubiously but shrugged.
"Ok."
John grinned at her.
"We got a peek at the past, the present, and probably the future." The captain's tone was incredibly smug.
Delia laughed weakly.
"Not sure I want any upheaval in my future, but that was definitely something." She admitted.
John collapsed backwards onto the deck.
"Heh, finally got something out of the Force. Finally!" He threw his hands up into the air. "I don't know if that's just the method that decided to work best for us or if it's all the time we put into this finally forced a response and I don't really care. It kriffing worked!"
Delia shook her head.
"Yeah, yeah it did." Delia shook her head. "Think it's time for you to go sleep this off now. I'll get this edited and posted."
"Yeah, yeah that sounds good. Goodnight galaxy, you've been a wonderful audience!" John's subdued cackles and the sight of Delia standing up cut to black as the recording ended.
Sitting back I tried and failed to calm my racing thoughts. That shouldn't have worked at all. But… But it seemed to. At least somewhat at any rate. The cards depicting the future were incredibly vague especially with John's comment that he felt it was about someone else. But even still the cards depicting past and present seemed to fit. Was it only chance… or did the Force truly answer their request through a deck of artistic cards?
{}{}{}{} Ahsoka
The cards were a little scary looking, but if they actually worked… maybe I could print out a set? Maybe ones with less scary, prettier pictures?
{}{}{}{} Palpatine
The Emperor. Hah. The fool had no idea did he? Truly even the predictions of other Force users heralded my ascension. And why should they not? Already I worked to turn the fool Captain's efforts to my own gain. And in time, oh yes. In time I would exact payment for the chaos he saw fit to unleash on the galaxy. It would make my rise to power more complicated but even this chaos could not stop my rise to ultimate power. Not now.
{}{}{}{} Windu
Sighing I massaged the bridge of my nose. The other Masters looked and felt equally vexed and exasperated through the Force.
"We should probably discuss the ramifications." Oppo Rancisis spoke quietly into the silent room.
With a deep sigh I stood.
"No. The repercussions are obvious. Across the galaxy many beings will attempt similar things and similar decks of cards will experience a swell in popularity. Forgive me, but I haven't the patience for another lengthy debate about the captain, his videos, or the changes his lessons will bring. I need to meditate and clear my head. I suspect many of us could benefit from a few hours of meditation. Let this insanity lie, if not forever, then at least for a few days."
Around the room many of the others nodded agreement and without further words the meeting came to an end. Sighing I slumped back into my chair. Eventually only Master Yoda and I remained.
"The young Captain, determined he is, if nothing else." The Grand Master spoke, tapping his stick against his seat.
"Yes." I admitted. "Though we already knew that."
Yoda only hummed thoughtfully.
"Unsettling it is, to see methods I would dismiss, work."
"Indeed. That is the thing that bothers me most in this. It wasn't clear or detailed or even terribly helpful. But that it worked at all…" I sighed. "Forgive me Master Yoda, but I really do feel the need to meditate." I stood to leave.
"As do I." The aged master admitted as he too rose. "But first, to the cafeteria, I will go. In need of stronger tea, I am."
My lips twisted up into a brief grin as I left the room. Tea. I was tempted to find something significantly stronger than tea.
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