An Audit Of The Finances Of The Organizations Colloquially Named Justice Unlimited and New Dawn
By Kermie Shelley Marie
January 21, 2068
Hello there. If you're reading this and not part of either of the organizations named above, please sit right there, Lady Leizi's already coming to kill you.
…
Ok, you're not dead yet? Is your neck intact? Good! Hello there (again)! My name is Shelley Marie, and as the new Secretary of (Superb and Absolute) Accounting of Justice Unlimited (a title I've given myself) (note to self Shelley delete all things in parentheses when handing this over to hot lightning lady) this will be my preliminary overview of Justice Unlimited and the Apiary's finances.
(And New Dawn's finances. Note to self; figure out a way to put New Dawn in here without making it obvious that ND and JU are in kahoots. Should I even know that?)
Let's get started with the basics.
Current Apiary Expenses
-650 Water
-650 Electricity
While considerable, the expenses for the Apiary's utilities are decent enough to be paid. As Chauncer told me, they only charge rent here equal to a part of the used utilities. In fact, I'm pretty sure that the tenants living inside the Apiary are actually
losing JU money in total. While I'm not down to support landlords, I feel that Justice Unlimited can probably be trusted with the money. (Which should be used to kick Crusade in the balls). Aside from that, we also have miscellaneous expenses, such as:
WiFi
-100
Insurance For The Entire Building (How Is It So Good)
-100
Which are both absurd, but in different ways. They're both paid for by the activity inside the Apiary, which is fine.
(Note to self: ask how good premiums on insurance for a building this big was. How many connections did Uiara have before her death?!)
So in total, each month the Apiary takes up
-1500 income each month. -500 of that is from the utility use of the tenants living here, while -1000 of that is just from the costs of having such a big building. It's worth noting that I've also canceled out an extra
-250, since that's paid by the rent. Consider having utility companies work with us on installing a smart power system, so that we don't route power to sectors without people inside there. (Seriously, there's so much empty space right now.)
Personal Justice Unlimited Expenses
These are our personal expenses, from our immediate members. While these are all paid for out of pocket by them,
with the exception of the last few items, it's worth including them on the balance sheet. These include:
- -2: Lady Leizi, buying alcohol. (I feel like I shouldn't ask. I wonder how good of a drinking partner she is tho?)
- -3: Black Swan, buying superhero merch. (Yeah, makes sense.)
- -10: Chatalet, Monthly supply of HRT symbiotes from Medicant. (Almost directly confirms we're in informal alliance with Medicant now— I know a kid from the LGBTQ+ support group I supervise who gets these for a bit more. Not that much more, mind you, since the symbiotes are still pretty affordable if you have a decent job.)
- -50: Dr. Ibis's new research equipment. (Wait, that can't be right… oh nvm, it's just that dude's kid. Seems genius runs in the family.)
- -1950: Refinement process of Goldnine, used for [REDACTED] (…this one and everything below it weren't out of pocket.)
- -50: Commision for costume of one hero, adult size. (Dr. Silver, I believe.)
- -4000: Refinement process of goldnine, used to raise genetic tolerance of [REDACTED] and [REDACTED] (?!??!??!?)
- -6000: Dozens of gallons of raw liquid Goldnine, bought from Yōulíngshé Industries by Lady Leizi. (What the fuck what the fuck huh.)
(Note to self ENCRYPT DELETE AND ATTEMPT TO FORGET THIS SHELLEY is JU attempting to give everybody cancer?! No, that's stupid… but they're doing something with DNA and goldnine.)
(…could this be the secret to how they managed to get back to full strength so quickly? Valiant Silver was an Algernon and a genius in her own right, I wouldn't be surprised if she had some sort of fucky secret plan in the works. Ask LL? Will she even have time? Ask Chauncer?)
(New Dawn Expenses and Income?!?!)
(Why the fuck are these in here?! New Dawn and Justice Unlimited working together?!? If I hadn't seen Wolong giving that speech with my own eyes, I wouldn't have believed it myself.
(Note to self Shelley: consider this entire next part as a candidate to be deleted or encrypted, just like the above. I don't think it would be good if anybody found out about this before we make a formal announcement. Should we invest more in opsec before convincing LL to invest in libraries and community centers?)
-1000 monthly, Zenith expenses, operations partially shared with JU
- -25: Sleeping medication for Dreamcatcher (poor dude, I hope that he dreams of something that isn't spiders soon…)
- -25: Pay for schooling of… Ollie Cunningham? (I forgot Miss Naught had a kid, NGL. Good to see that he's getting his education.)
- -50: supply of painkillers for Wolong and Arc (Wolong's power gives him headaches, IIRC. Glad to hear that Arc is alive, Fran always thought she was cool.)
- -400: hourly pay for Medicant for work as personal nurse/doctor for Arc (??? I have so many questions but I don't think I'm gonna be getting answers.)
+1500-2000, Uni District contract
Yeah yeah, everyone knows about this one. It looks like it's being split with us, though, more on that below.
Current Sources Of Income
Rent from tenants
+250
Mentioned above, helps pay for our utilities, not much to say here. (We need more community connection though. Consider monthly Apiary civilian meetings? Is that plausible currently?)
Worker's Mitt Contract
+1000 each month
I'm glad that JU has reinstated this. It's good to have JU be seen around their old territory. Still gives the same amount as always, though.
(AND YOU CAN FUCKING SUCK MY DICK, DELEON. YOUR WIFE DOESN'T LOVE YOU AND I DON'T THINK A SINGLE PERSON DISAGREED WHEN I ASKED FOR A PROTEST IN THE GROUPCHAT. WE'RE TAKING YOUR MONEY AND YOUR ELECTORAL POWER, YOU STAIN ON THE EARTH.)
(
Ahem. I have no idea who just wrote that, ignore the piece of very true writing up there.)
Uni District, Partial Contract (???)
+1500 each month
This is a split contract, where while the money goes to New Dawn first, Wolong then sends it to our bank accounts. Huh.
Possible Future Sources Of Income(?)
Marketable Plushies
+???
Well, if we have to go into some new line of merch aside from the figures we're already selling, it'll have to be marketable plushies. I doubt New Dawn would really be into it, but it's better than Crusade, who probably are just gonna make their (cheap, whitewashed) action figures with plastic more brittle than a… um… (note to self insert metaphor here)
Obviously, contracting OrbCo does seem like a good idea, but Hellian Enterprises or even Daedalus Toys are good manufacturers that we should keep in consideration. (Note to self: study or ask Soraria about manufacturing costs, copyright laws here in Horizon, and which heroes would be the best as plushies. Making those little buggers Menagerie Witch can summon would work, and selling a Black Swan and VG plushie as a paired bundle would be cute. Would Mona dislike me for it? Naahhhh, the tiny baby bisexual/gay black hole should be fine.)
Behemoth Hunting Patrols
+750 per Silver, +2000 per Gold
I don't even have anything fun to say here. Assign squad for easy Behemoth killing? Handyman and MW's Echidna seem to be decent close range combatants, but they lack high-tier regen or invulnerability.
Killing Named Behemoths(???)
+4000 per Name
Now, I'm not saying this is a
good idea… but if Black Swan could blast FVM all those weeks ago and get off without a scratch, we should genuinely consider this. However, I'd like this to be left up to our active hero team, who will actually be the combatants.
Sponsorships From Corps
+??? monthly
I do not personally support corporate sinking their teeth into our heroes. However, our
personal expenses will need a sponsorship or two in order for us to keep doing them at the rate that we're doing them. I would, however,
strongly advise against any contracts with Dominion or English-McLeod.
OID Contract Retaking
+2000 monthly, +2000 from ilegal contract suspension penalty clause.
While I do think that this is a reasonable way to regain Justice Unlimited's former funding, I do truly believe that we should be very careful about how we regain control of the OID, with the Demon Flamez and other criminal elements in the area. Again, I will leave it up to our hero team to see if we are up to do this.
Possible Future Expenditures(?)
Community Centers/outreach
-1000 each
Chauncer, you know well how much the community needs this. Heck, I'm not even gonna try to explain this. Soraria's gonna tell you all her plans, anyways. Remember, schools, libraries, stadiums…
Advertising
-500
It would be nice to have more support staff to help out me, Soraria, and Song, and running a series of ads on Apiary walls, billboards, and
Hero for Hire for a week or two at a time would work. (Also, all us new hires' names start with S! Isn't that funny?)
(…more heroes?)
(-???)
(Can we even support all these people? Do we have the infrastructure to make sure they are all well fed, cared for when it comes to their injuries, and train their powers well? Shoot, this is complicated.)
In Conclusion,
(We're fucked.) Justice Unlimited is doing fine. We are currently running at a +1000 per month budget, and we'll be fine as long as we budget our money responsibly and only spend as much as the JU in three months can handle. As such, I support a budgeting program on our personal expenses, and a fundraising program split between raising quality of life here in the Apiary and our "personal expenses"…
(Note to self: consider finishing up and handing this in tomorrow, after you've had either a few hours of gaming, reading, or drinking. Whichever one is more convienient.)
Author's Note:
While Soraria, Song, and Cain are probably doing fine, Shelley is about to get a migraine or an aneurysm. Or maybe both at once. Wish her well!
