Remove ads

Loyalty is its own Reward (A Traitor Legion Chapter Master Quest)

Voting is open
Reader mode
ThunderOwl said:
This is great. I really like how instead of being a conversation like it was with Karark Zel and Catilina they just start swinging, which is more fitting of Hostilius. I also like how the first to take a stance is Severus, which gives permission to the fight. I do think that Severus exaggerates a bit when he says the whole "provoke open war within the Chapter, you and Pluvia would have killed each other" but I think that's part of the point he was making. Still, I am curious as to why Severus is an obelisk in the metaphor.

First of all, if you, or anyone else writing an Omake, want my perspective of a character and their thought processes, feel free to PM me and I'll be happy to share it. As for Hostilius, part of it is what you pointed out, that Hostilius holds everyone at very high standards. Another part of it is that he lacks in empathy, is prideful and he has a "my way or the highway" view on things.

Canonized, and both Severus and Hostilius gain 50XP on fellowship.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
In reverse order - I'm aware I can ask, but part of the reason I write omakes is because I'm trying to be a better writer, and one of the fundamental requirements of being a good writer is being able to write in a voice not your own without prompting.

In other words, I am more than happy to ask, but I wanted to see if I could get it "right" the "first" time :V

Hostilius is a bit lacking in empathy? Perish the though :eek:

Making Severus an obelisk was sort of a trial and error thing of "what does he look like in the warp?"
---He's a building of some kind, because nothing less substantial would survive what he did and still be a Chapter Master worth the name
---He's not something notably specialized like a trench network or a foundry, because he's special but not special enough that his mere existence would have a distinct "purpose".
---He's not something defensive like a castle or fortress, because he's a Mist Shrike and - don't get him wrong, credit where credit's due to Iron Warriors and Imperial Fists and Imperial Guard and whatnot - defense is for pussies :V.
---He's something with a distinctly memorial purpose, because memories of virtue lost and what-should-have-been is absolutely a core part of his character
---And most importantly, he's something tall - something you can see, or depending on the light even feel, from very far away as befits a leader of Men and Nations, whether directly or at a couple removes.
---I thought about a lighthouse, but...Mist Shrike.

I know there's other options in that thought process - heck, I can even see one of them as I write this - but as near as I can tell the strain of logic that connects the pieces is tolerably sound, and that's good enough for now.

(No seriously, I love me some ImpG and a good combined arms barrage + assault forwards - ImpG Main for life - but a little sneeki stabby on the side is nice too)
 
Last edited:
Remove ads
Guide to the Planets of the Aetelian Sector: Kondora
  • Informational
    • Kondora


    Classification:     Hive World


    Administratum Tithe: Exactis Secundus


    Population: 564 Billion


    Capital: Hive Elros


    Day Cicle Duration (In terran standard): 32 Hours



    "For the crimes of sedition and treason against the God-Emperor you have been judged as guilty and sentenced to death." – Commisar Joesph Formido of the Kondoran 56th line regiment sentencing the Governor of Zelote after a failed rebellion.

    "Having a commissar around is terrible, but working with the Kondorans, that's 10 times worse" – Durranti Colonel Richard Compton after finding out he has reinforcements.

    "Justice doesn't sleep" – Kondoran Idiom for the Arbities.



    Overview:

    Located in the Carybdis Subsector in the Aetelian Sector, Kondora was discovered in 921.M30, and was peacefully integrated into the imperium. During the Horus Heresy some of Kondora's nobles sided with Horus and through a combination of bribes and threats got almost half of the PDF to rebel as well. What followed was a long and brutal civil war with neither side gaining any ground despite the advantages the traitors had. Taking advantage of the chaos the gangs of the underhives started to get bold and attacking areas in middle and even upper hives taking huge chunks of territory and even the Hive city of Moria falling completely under gang control. However, after 30 years of gruelling warfare the loyalists won, and all the traitors were executed. It took the Kondorans 20 more years to purge the hive gangs from their newly conquered territory in the upper and middle levels of the hives most being culled to manageable levels and slinking back into the under hives. The only exception was Hive Moria, which had become a ganger's paradise after its fall, many of these gangs having fallen to Slannesh or Khorne. It was determined that taking back Moria would be too costly and with how most if not all of the loyalists in the hive were probably already dead it was decided the hive would be raised to the ground. For 30 years the hive was bombarded by artillery and orbital guns only stopping to reload and swap gunnery crews, until nothing but a pile of rubble remained.

    After the heresy many of the people of Kondora developed a strong sense of loathing for those who broke the laws. It was believed that if the corruption and crime weren't as prominent then the civil war wouldn't have caused so much destruction. As such during the rebuilding a lot of resources were put into the building up the law enforcement and rewriting the legal code. New laws were passed that cracked down on corruption and loopholes were plugged, making it almost impossible to bribe, embezzle or commit a crime in most parts of the hives without getting caught. Kondoran Arbities unlike some of their counterparts on other imperial worlds treat the victims of more mundane crimes with great amounts of compassion seeing them as needing to be taken care of and built back up. However, they treat suspects and lawbreakers with the same if not even more brutal efficiency of normal arbities. The Kondoran penal code is extensive with every crime having multiple punishments that can be administered depending on the severity of the crime. Crimes such as theft can be punished with a minimum sentence of 1-year hard labour, to the maximum sentence of being turned into a servitor.

    Due to the efficiency and expertise of Kondora's arbites their tithe primarily consists of producing much of the equipment for the Adeptus Arbitites of the Aetelian sector, everything from uniforms, to armour, to weapons. When this tithe can not be met Kondora raises and equips regiments of the Kondoran Justicars for the Imperial Guard. The Kondoran Justicars are commonly sent to put down rebellions often with little in the way of collateral damage if they can help it. They also have gained a reputation for shooting the planetary government and local nobility whether it be for incompetence, embezzlement, or even heresy on some occasions. They also have a reputation for following the rules and don't like it when regulations are not being followed, this has caused many regiments like the Durranti volunteers to be wary whenever they join the same campaign.


    Trivia:

    • There are three crimes on Kondora that have only one punishment: sedition, treason, and heresy.
    • Hive Moria is seen as a reminder for what happens to those who break the law of the emperor.
    • Occasionally what remains of Hive Moria will be used as target practice for new recruits of the PDF artillery regiments.
    • The Kondoran Justicars recruit from both the planetary PDF and Arbities.
    • Kondoran Guardsmen have their armour and uniforms coloured in purple and black to represent their commitment to justice and their duty to the emperor.
    • The most common infraction the Kondorans have to deal with when dealing with other regiments are violations of imperial regulation 08-44-76B: Intoxication on Duty

    Authors Note: Here is the next entry into the Aetelian Sector
     
    Last edited:
  • Informational
    • @RedWake i freaking love these guys. They're pretty hard with the degree and frequencies of their punishment, but a very fair. The fact that they occasionally shoot the governor is just the cherry on top. Shame you didn't mention them shooting the nobility too.
     
    RedWake said:
    Kondora


    Classification:     Hive World


    Administratum Tithe: Exactis Secundus


    Population: 564 Billion


    Capital: Hive Elros


    Day Cicle Duration (In terran standard): 32 Hours



    "For the crimes of sedition and treason against the God-Emperor you have been judged as guilty and sentenced to death." – Commisar Joesph Formido of the Kondoran 56th line regiment sentencing the Governor of Zelote after a failed rebellion.

    "Having a commissar around is terrible, but working with the Kondorans, that's 10 times worse" – Durranti Colonel Richard Compton after finding out he has reinforcements.

    "Justice doesn't sleep" – Kondoran Idiom for the Arbities.



    Overview:

    Located in the Carybdis Subsector in the Aetelian Sector, Kondora was discovered in 921.M30, and was peacefully integrated into the imperium. During the Horus Heresy some of Kondora's nobles sided with Horus and through a combination of bribes and threats got almost half of the PDF to rebel as well. What followed was a long and brutal civil war with neither side gaining any ground despite the advantages the traitors had. Taking advantage of the chaos the gangs of the underhives started to get bold and attacking areas in middle and even upper hives taking huge chunks of territory and even Hive Moria falling completely under gang control. However, after 30 years of gruelling warfare the loyalists won, and all the traitors were executed. It took the Kondorans 20 more years to purge the hive gangs from their newly conquered territory in the upper and middle levels of the hives most being culled to manageable levels and slinking back into the under hives. The only exception was Hive Moria, which had become a ganger's paradise after its fall, many of these gangs having fallen to Slannesh and Khorne. It was determined that taking back Moria would be too costly and with how most if not all of the loyalists in the hive were probably already dead it was decided the hive would be raised to the ground. For 30 years the hive was bombarded by artillery and orbital guns only stopping to reload and swap gunnery crews, until nothing but a pile of rubble remained.

    After the heresy many of the people of Kondora developed a strong sense of loathing for those who broke the laws. It was believed that if the corruption and crime weren't as prominent then the civil war wouldn't have caused so much destruction. As such during the rebuilding a lot of resources were put into the building up the law enforcement and rewriting the legal code. New laws were passed that cracked down on corruption and loopholes were plugged, making it almost impossible to bribe, embezzle or commit a crime in most of the spot of the hives without getting caught. Kondoran Arbities unlike some of their counterparts on other imperial worlds treat the victims of more mundane crimes with great amounts of compassion seeing them as needing to be taken care of and built back up. However, they treat suspects and lawbreakers with the same if not even more brutal efficiency of normal arbities. The Kondoran penal code is extensive with every crime having multiple punishments that can be administered depending on the severity of the crime. Crimes such as theft can be punished with a minimum sentence of 1-year hard labour, to the maximum sentence of being turned into a servitor.

    Due to the efficiency and expertise of Kondora's arbites their tithe primarily consists of producing much of the equipment for the Adeptus Arbitites of the Aetelian sector, everything from uniforms, to armour, to weapons. When this tithe can not be met Kondora raises and equips regiments of the Kondoran Justicars for the Imperial Guard. The Kondoran Justicars are commonly sent to put down rebellions often with little in the way of collateral damage if they can help it. They also have gained a reputation for shooting the planetary government and local nobility whether it be for incompetence, embezzlement, or even heresy on some occasions. They also have a reputation for following the rules and don't like it when regulations are not being followed, this has caused many regiments like the Durranti volunteers to be wary whenever they join the same campaign.


    Trivia:

    • There are three crimes on Kondora that have only one punishment: sedition, treason, and heresy.
    • Hive Moria is seen as a reminder for what happens to those who break the law of the emperor.
    • Occasionally what remains of Hive Moria will be used as target practice for new recruits of the PDF artillery regiments.
    • The Kondoran Justicars recruit from both the planetary PDF and Arbities.
    • Kondoran Guardsmen have their armour and uniforms coloured in purple and black to represent their commitment to justice and their duty to the emperor.
    • The most common infraction the Kondorans have to deal with when dealing with other regiments are violations of imperial regulation 08-44-76B: Intoxication on Duty

    Authors Note: Here is the next entry into the Aetelian Sector
    Click to expand...
    Click to shrink...
    Definitely need to send a few recruitment drive missions there or set up a small recruiting office because I have a feeling that they will integrate lovely with the chapter ideas of law and punishment
     
    Remove ads
    Alone with His Thoughts
  • Apocrypha
    • Alone with his thoughts

    When you're interred in a Dreadnaught you don't have much to do when not in combat. Most of your time not on deployment is spent resting, only to be awoken during times of battle. So a marine in a dreadnought has little to do but dream, dream and think.

    Former Chapter Champion, and current Tomb Captain Claudius Spatha had little to complain about compared to most of his fellow Dreadnaught's after all his body was mostly intact he didn't need to deal with the constant pain of his mortal wounds that other's of his kind usually felt.

    He did however have one complaint: the dreams. While being interred had stopped his prophetic abilities from killing him as they had been before it didn't stop the visions. Though many were as illegible as the countless dreams that were forgotten by any who slept. Some came through clear.

    Spatha beheld the battle his brother Mist Shrikes, his cousins of the Blazing Wardens, and other space marines battleing the Eye's of the Mutator. He saw Severus, and the Honorguard cutting through traitor's trying to get to a building that the traitor's furiously defend.

    He sees the servants of the Ruinous powers throw themselves in waves to slow down the Mist Shrikes, and then he hear's an Ominous laugh from the Traitor Captain that was dueling Severus.

    "You're too late." the Traitor laughs, as a Daemon appears atop the building the traitor's fought so hard to defend.

    Spatha awoke the bulky form of his chassis rushing forward, almost crushing the Techmarine that had been running a diagnostic on him.

    "I must warn the Chapter Master!" The Tomb Captain shouts, before rising and marching towards the Chapter Master's Office."


    Don't know if this is possible with the Prophet Trait and Dreadnaughts but the idea was interesting to me so I thought I'd put it in here
     
  • Apocrypha
    • Centergg said:
    It is not a paranoia when they really out there to get you.
    Also, question to thise more Lore aware than me. Does Flaymaster still exist in some capacity? Has he became a daemon of some kind? Can he be that thing which attacked our Librarian boy? Can he haunt dreams of Valzadai?
    Click to expand...
    Click to shrink...
    He a canon character so he may still be alive. Mawdrym Llansahai - Warhammer 40k - Lexicanum

    He was last seen wounded but alive after fighting the blood angels 10000 years ago.
     
    Remove ads
    Reader mode
    You must login or register to reply here.
    Voting is open
    Remove ads
    Back
    Top