Author's Note: I'll be slowing down to updating daily or every other day instead of the insane twice-a-day pace of the last week. I'm still plenty enthusiastic, but real life obligations call. (♬ It's beginning to feel a lot like F THIS— ♬)
Aww, it's so much fun, but IRL does often call. That's a clever song pun, though.
Um. The only supplementary taste they'd detect would be any remaining blood, sweat, dirt, or other detritus left. The rest would merely be a matter of quality and quantity. How to explain that in a manner Aiz wouldn't find suspicious?
"They discard the corrupting aspects," Queen Administrator claimed. "The only measure they care about is magical power. Stronger Magic Stones will therefore always receive a better response. However, they will still appreciate even the little ones."
None of what she'd said was a lie. It just didn't directly link cause to implied effect.
And once again QA proves to be alarmingly good at manipulating people once she has enough information to work with.
Queen Administrator looked at her expression of poorly-hidden unhappiness and came to a decision.
"Hestia understandably worries," QA explained. "You may come home with me to hand-feed them if you so desire. Either of my Friends should be strong enough to carry your weight without issues."
As Aiz's posture restored itself, Welf let out the broken fragments of what should've been a single bark of laughter.
"Are you trying to feed the rumor-mill?" he demanded.
Awww, QA inviting a human friend over to play. Also, the rumor mills are going to go completely bonkers at this. And Welf is just sitting over there on the side watching the train wreck, unable to look away.
-that entire section about getting Hestia and Loki to stop being awful to each other-
Huh. That... might actually work? Depends on how much shame Loki is capable of feeling... always was a loose cannon, that one.
"Shame works just as well. Hestia is empathic enough to ignore jabs if I ask her to. Orario's general public can then Loki into ceasing her attacks on a target who refuses to mount a counterattack. The long-term outcome would remain the same."
I think there's a word missing here.
"…I feel like I just watched two people plot murder..."
Don't worry, they're just murdering a grudge.
They were polite enough not to ask or demand what had happened or why Aiz was riding one of Host's Friends, but that didn't stop them from loudly gossiping before Host and Aiz had even left hearing range.
dis gon b gud.gif
"—Heard the Loki Familia is scouting her—"
I doubt QA would be willing to jump ship. She has all the power she needs (i.e. all of it), and Hestia is a much, much better parent than Loki is...
"—Spent all day in the Dungeon to find Canary's attackers—"
Ooh, that WOULD kinda look like that from an outsider's perspective if Aiz was only romping around the uppermost levels for an entire day despite getting jack fucking shit for it. I can kind of understand how this one got started.
"—Loki complaining someone had stolen 'Her Aiz'—"
Oh geez, I forgot how fucking possessive Loki was in canon danmachi... this rumor may actually be true. That's an oof.
"—Good gods, the size of those teeth—"
Captain obvious response, but not an unreasonable reaction.
Well that's... a ship I never thought I'd see. Still, obvs reading a fair bit too much into it (for now) because there's like no evidence whatsoever for it.
"—Princess from an exotic jungle kingdom—"
Yeah, the urban jungle, maybe.
"—Hephaestus's kid, his expression is hilarious—"
They're not wrong.
"—Backpack has her favorite possessions, she's clearly moving out—"
Ummmm, the backpack was stuffed full of small monster cores?
Queen Administrator vaguely wondered if the local populace were comprised almost exclusively of idiots.
Well, we've got 4 obvious idiots (Loki scouting her, love at first sight, princess from the jungle, and moving out), 1 well-reasoned but ultimately incorrect conclusion (hunting Canary's attackers), 1 rumor that sounds idiotic but is actually alarmingly plausible (Loki complaining about stolen Aiz), 1 stating the obvious (the size of those teeth), and 1 gentleman of taste (expression is hilarious)
That's at least 50% idiots, possibly up to 87.5% depending on how one defines idiocy.
It was possible; the influence and median petty nature of pseudo-hosts may select against those possessing critical thinking skills.
*looks at the state of the world* She's not wrong.
Aiz weathered their attention with the poise and confidence of someone who had long since developed what Host called 'Stockholm Syndrome' and now only let herself whimper on the inside.
Awwwwww.
Hestia had thought her life couldn't get any more surreal.
Well that's your first mistake right there.
learning that Hephaestus's Familia had grown so much she hardly even guided her own children anymore
Oh, that's an oof.
the creation of two large, fully-grown murderkitties from nothing more than Magic Stones and a weird contraption of metal and thread
"fully-grown" lmao
there was a rather long list and it showed no sign of stopping.
Better get used to that!
Finding the Sword Princess literally sitting on her doorstep as Administrator's Friends licked Magic Stones out of her offered palms? That was just a little above her tolerance level. The goddess slowly backed away and went down to cook the celebratory dinner she'd originally been planning. She needed the normality right then.
Better make extra, just in case Aiz can stay for dinner. (and a passerby sees Aiz going in alone after Hestia calls them in for dinner, which as Welf informed us implies that Canary is asking Aiz out, feeding the rumor mill even more)
Dreamer found herself deeply conflicted. She and her guest-self liked the golden girl, Sympathizer, far more than she'd expected or even found rational. That impression was only reinforced after Sympathizer fed their Friends an alibi for their durability and general combat strength.
Well, on one hand, that's a bit cold. On the other, yaaaay friendship! Also, Sympathizer? Interesting choice of name for a pseudo-pseudo-host.
(Dreamer still needed to find a way to avoid babies but it was like their species had never even tried and hahahahaha how–)
just imagine the havoc that would ensue if, in public, QA told Aiz that she had her baby...
Dreamer had mostly managed to bend the magic skin-writing to her whims
Woah woah woah, that's a bit of a game-breaker right there!
It couldn't be something that specifically bound Sympathizer to Dreamer's guest-self; if it was, then the city would pressure New-Mother into yielding her child to Sympathizer's incredibly irresponsible parent. That was not allowed.
Well, if Loki is scouting Canary, they're shit outta luck.
Something to increase Sympathizer's survivability may well turn her into her family's damage-taker and increase Sympathizer's level of danger overall.
It's kind of funny how skills that are ostensibly to make you take less damage end up making you take more damage overall.
Enhancing her preexisting skill born of hatred, Avenger, would just shove her further down the path of anti-social tendencies and unhappiness.
And already, QA understands other people's emotional responses better than many humans do.
-segment on how bad Entities are at parenting-
You'd think someone would have caught onto that.
...Oooh, idea! Dreamer could provide her guest-self with a future excuse and help Sympathizer at the same time! And maybe railroad a little, but it was for a good cause! An excellent name continued to elude Dreamer, though. Using a guy's name for a girl's gift was odd, but might just prove to be necessary after all.
Not sure why it "might just prove to be necessary after all"; the wording seems to imply that it will prove necessary at some point in the distant future, as opposed to 'right now because i have no other name ideas'.
Chiron: Dramatically enhances magnitude of user's growth when they nurture the growth of another. Effects scale with both the user's desire to teach and the achievements of students. Most effective if a chosen pupil was at level 1 when nurturing began.
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAAHHAAHAHA oh god this is gonna be gooood
Taylor really can totally railroad people together by granting them particular skills, though... a great power, rife for potential abusive mischief (fear the day that Taylor becomes a shipper, for no god will be able to keep her OTP from ending up together; likewise, nothing says "stay away" like a skill whose side effects ruin any potential party synergy)
Anyway,
Given how much sheer bullshit attention Hestia and co are about to get and in future I really wonder how Bell-kun showing up is going to work out
Not sure if Bell is going to show up in this story? It's possible that he was going to ask Hestia but didn't find the opportunity due to her being busy dealing with QTay, and ended up in some other ludicrously tiny family instead. Or it's possible that he doesn't exist in this continuity, or perhaps he got swapped with Taylor (in which case, ouch, dude.)
Or he could just be coming up in the future. *shrug* There's not really any sort of solid calendar at all in danmachi and I don't think we know shit about the date in this crossover. (If he does join, the presence of Taylor will only increase his level of bullshit from its already-high levels, which could lead to a bullshit infinite feedback loop that catapults Taylor, Aiz, and Bell clear up to god-tier)
That said, there are totally going to be way too many people applying for Hestia's familia in relatively short order. Most of them will change their tune when they realize she's still dirt-poor and living in an abandoned church, but the truly desperate might find themselves not caring.
