Sidestory 9 - Funeral March
On a cold, rainy afternoon, five girls stood amongst the rubble of a hard-fought battle. Before them sat a crystalline shape that swallowed up all light that touches it. It was a featureless, unassailable shadow, stubbornly repelling all attempts to breach it.
"As I have said, attempting to destroy the isolation field is a waste of effort on multiple levels. None of you currently have the capabilities necessary, and even if you could it would still be a bad idea. Without the field, even I don't know what will happen to you."
"Are you crazy?" Sayaka shouted, stabbing uselessly at the crystalline void. "X is trapped in there with that monster! We've gotta do something! And don't think we forgot what you did to us!"
The Incubator fell silent, still save for its tail flicking back and forth.
"I can no longer safely observe the contents of the field. At this point, the most efficient way to guarantee X's safety would be for somebody to make a Wish. Madoka, your potential would-"
"No." Mami cut the Incubator off aloud before Homura could even reach for her shield. It was an odd sight, seeing the veteran Magical Girl take such a stern tone with Kyubey. Just another feature of this loop that was out of the ordinary. "Remember what X said about making a Contract. Don't risk your soul like this."
"B-but if X gets hurt… isn't it worth it? I can't just sit back and do nothing." Madoka insisted. Because of course she would be willing to sacrifice herself for someone she met less than a week ago. Again, Homura reached for her shield, but this time something else stopped her.
This would be the moment everything falls apart, wouldn't it? Whether now or later, Madoka will make a Contract to try and save X. As powerful as the older woman was, whatever had happened here was enough for the Incubators to personally respond to it. Whatever Mami and Yuma insisted, Homura knew well enough not to believe in miracles or best-case scenarios. Even if Homura could convince Madoka not to become a Magical Girl, X's disappearance would surely mean the end of her alliance with Mami and the others, not to mention what losing her mother a second time would do to Mami's mental state. There was no way for this to end happily.
Another loop, ended prematurely. All that was left was to wait for the end.
Homura knew this feeling. She'd felt it many times before. So why did it hurt so much more now?
Because this time was different. This time, there had been a chance.
Madoka and Mami had accepted her, and even Sayaka seemed to have been becoming accustomed to her presence. They had learned the first of the horrible secrets kept by the Incubators and survived. There had been somebody else who knew everything that was going on, who was willing to help. Who might have understood what Homura was going through. Who might have…
And now that person was gone, and with them all the other changes would vanish as well.
Homura never should have gotten her hopes up. In the end, everything was still the same. Back to the cycle.
"Maybe, but that's no excuse to just give up on everything! You've already gotten this far."
Homura startled, rapidly scanning the ruined subway tunnels for any sign of whoever just spoke. Strangely, there was nobody there but the four other girls. It couldn't have been one of them, could it?
"You've failed after getting close to success before, and you still kept going then."
"Who's there?" Homura asked to nobody, doing her best to keep her voice level. Magical Girls don't have the luxury of excess emotions. She couldn't afford to lose composure now and make things worse. The others turned towards her, confused.
"Homura? What is it?" Madoka asked.
"I… I thought I heard a voice. Did none of you hear anything?" Whatever the response was, Homura didn't not hear it.
"It doesn't matter what you lose as long as you can keep going, right?"
"Am I actually going crazy? Now, after everything I've done?" Homura muttered, unaware of the frightened looks of the other children around her.
"You're not crazy. You're just doing what's necessary to reach the thing you want. Isn't that what everyone does?"
"No, I- I gave up on reaching what I really want a long time ago." Homura's voice shook and cracked, completely unlike the cold, clinical tone she usually took. The other girls stared in confusion and worry as the time traveler spoke into the empty air. The Incubator, all but forgotten, watched silently. The upcoming moments may provide valuable information.
"What was it that you wanted, then? All those years ago."
"It doesn't matter now. I might have wished for more than this, but wishes don't come true."
"If you don't believe in your wish anymore, then why are you still here? Why keep repeating the same things if you don't believe you can make a difference?"
What I believe isn't important. I have to save her. Even if it's impossible, I will continue anyways. Nothing else matters.
You really do care about her, don't you? It's wonderful seeing somebody devote themselves so completely to another person.
Can you… can you help me save her? I don't have anything else left. Even if it takes a hundred… no, a thousand years, I can't give up. So if you can help me keep going…
Don't worry.
I think I can do something about that.
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Homura could feel herself breaking apart. It didn't matter. She knew that her body hasn't been her for a long time now. As the dust was washed away, all she felt was satisfaction. Not happiness, not yet. She still had a duty to fulfill. But this would make it easier.
When the last traces of her old flesh had blown away, she was surprised at how… normal she looks. Unmistakably unnatural, yes, but still recognizable as human. It's more than she ever expected from her fate. Her Soul Gem was gone, vanished at some point during the process. It didn't bother her as much as it should. She knew she doesn't need it now.
The most obvious change was her clothes. The formerly simple costume had been replaced by a black soldier's vest, silver buttons and epaulettes shining brightly despite the poor light. Faded purple gloves covered her hands, concealing the crude machinery beneath. Similarly-colored patterns of gears were barely visible across the uniform, shifting and turning as though they were more than just images. Holes in the outfit, made by countless wounds accumulated over years of service, revealed the intricate clockwork beneath the fragile porcelain that replaced her skin. A heavy, tattered grey coat sat loose on her shoulders, billowing out as if catching some nonexistent wind. A pink-red ribbon had been tied around her waist in an oversized bow, like she was a toy being gifted to a child. The ends of the ribbon twitched and squirmed like tentacles, contrasting the body of the bow's unnatural stiffness. One end carried a glass baton topped with an hourglass-shaped bulb filled with purple sand, the other a small silver key.
This transformation should have been terrifying. And yet, it was not. Everything felt completely natural. Homura raised an arm, staring in muted curiosity at the stiff, mechanical motion. She felt a touch of surprise when her face did not change to match the sensation. No, that too was to be expected. She did not commonly emote before, and so the capacity was simply removed in this new form. Everything that might hold her back had been removed, leaving room for progress.
The power to continue the cycle forever, if necessary. The power to ensure it would not be necessary. Where had it come from?
Homura took distant notice of the voices around her. Right, Madoka and the others were still here. The Incubator as well, irritatingly present despite the clear discomfort of everyone else. Homura considered shooting the offending creature before turning her attention away. As easy as it would have been to destroy that body, it would mean little but a temporary setback for the Incubator. A waste of energy when Homura needed everything she could manage for this next act.
The current course of events was unacceptable. Ending this loop and restarting the cycle was an acceptable option, but a waste of resources. A waste of an opportunity, letting the best chance she had ever seen slip away. If events progressed as they are, Madoka was extremely likely to contract. But returning to the way things had been, struggling alone to hold everything together was a poor choice. Homura had not succeeded on her own so far. Even committing herself fully to her goal, that pattern was likely to hold. So something would have to be done to change what was happening.
Homura ignored the increasingly frantic conversation around her as she stepped towards the Incubators' creation. Distractions could not be afforded at this time. Not when the stakes were as high as they are. There would be time to explain later, as little as Homura herself knew about what has happened. If there's one thing she has always had, it was time.
Homura reached for the crystalline shadow, hands dragging through the endless expanse of time, and pulled.
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