Apocryphal Chapter - Bad End 1.1: The More Things Change
Sayaka had been forgetting things.
That was normal. Her memory wasn't bad, but it wasn't perfect either. She forgot an assignment or two, but when it came to important things she was usually spot-on. Lately though, there was definitely something important that she'd been forgetting. She couldn't remember what it was, obviously, but it was always there in the back of her head. Taunting her, always just barely out of reach. And she was pretty sure it had something to do with Homura.
Her classmate was pretty uninteresting, all things considered. She didn't talk to very many people, did pretty well academically but didn't stand out, and nobody really knew much about her. She'd actually approached Sayaka a few times, offering to hang out or just talk during lunch, but Sayaka always turned her down. For some reason, she just didn't feel comfortable around the dark-haired girl.
It wasn't a consistent feeling, either. Sometimes just mild irritation, sometimes visceral, personal hatred that Sayaka always felt shook by when it faded. She didn't understand it. As far as she could remember, Homura hadn't done anything to her or anyone else Sayaka knew. Like she said, they barely interacted. So it didn't make any sense for her to feel that way about Homura.
It was weird that she always thought of her as "Homura", too. Not Akemi. Just Homura. Sayaka had plenty of friends, yeah, but only a few she was actually on a first-name basis with. Another odd detail, but one that seemed opposed to the deep distaste that bubbled up every time the other student glanced her way.
Sayaka didn't know how all these things were connected, but they were. She just knew it. So what did that mean? Homura and her used to be friends, but Homura did something awful and ruined it? And then Sayaka somehow forgot about it all? It still made no sense.
Sayaka stared blankly at her homework. Nope, nothing. She couldn't focus like this.
Something was definitely wrong. She had to have noticed it before, she had to. And she remembered going over the facts in her head before this, but every time she did her attention would just
slip
and she'd end up forgetting about it again. Always forgetting, forgetting something important.
Something important that Homura took.
Sayaka slammed her hands into her desk, upsetting her stationary and cracking the glass. She didn't notice. She had remembered something! Because yes, that was absolutely what had happened. It wasn't much detail to work off of, but it was something.
She and Homura had been friends. And there had been other people, too. Three? Four? Five? Four, sometimes five. Yeah, that sounded about right. Things had been good, she remembered, even if the specifics were still totally lost. There was only a hazy impression of difficulty and challenges that all ended in success. Of a feeling of belonging and purpose that she'd been missing for so, so long. Sayaka was overcome with a sudden feeling of nostalgia, of longing for this time she didn't truly remember.
Everything had been going great, until something horrible had happened. Sayaka still couldn't recall what it was. Only the feeling of confidence and certainty that had shattered and turned to hopelessness and weakness and loss and failure-
-and then it was over. And Homura had done something terrible after that. Something that had ensured that it wouldn't ever be fixed.
The cracks spread across Sayaka's desk, but she had already abandoned it to stare aimlessly out the window. She could almost hear the sound of waves from outside, just barely. She had to do something. Somebody had to do something, and Sayaka didn't know if anyone else would. Because there was something wrong with the world, and it only got more and more obvious the more Sayaka remembered. But where would she even start? She didn't even know what was wrong. Just that Homura had done something awful. And that Homura was screwing with her memories somehow, which meant she had to act fast before the other girl figured out that Sayaka remembered and made her forget again.
But again, what could she do? Faint as they were, Sayaka always remembered Homura being stronger than her somehow. So she would need to get stronger. Needed to learn more about what was really going on, and what she had forgotten. She needed to be more than she was if she was going to defeat Homura and save everyone. She needed to-
"Woah there. I see where this is going, and I don't think either of us want to end up with the mess it'll make."
There was somebody standing behind Sayaka. She couldn't hear them moving or even breathing. But they were there, in the same way a person feels the sun peeking out from behind a cloud. She didn't know how, but she knew this person. That feeling of warmth and confidence was as familiar as the sunlight and far more certain. She wanted to turn around, knowing that the sight of this person will spark another wave of memories, but she remained frozen in place, staring out the window.
"Careful. You've forgotten quite a bit. Recovering so many memories all at once would do bad things to your brain, and I'm not in any position to ease the transfer at the moment." the voice warned, calm and collected despite the danger implied by their words.
"What are you?" Sayaka asked. What, not who. It's not the question she expected to ask, but it spilled forth nonetheless.
"That would take too long to explain when we only have so much time, but suffice to say that I was a human who researched and created supernatural phenomena. Eventually, I stopped being human." the voice answers.
"Is that really true?" Sayaka's first instinct was to reject that last statement, no matter how confidently it was stated. The thing standing behind her wasn't human, yes. No human had a presence like that. But the idea of whoever it was calling themself inhuman simply didn't sit right with her. Still, she just couldn't muster the same conviction that the voice spoke with.
"It is." they confirmed plainly, with the same tone one might take when declaring the sky is blue. "But it doesn't matter right now. We only met after that point. It has been a few years, but I am still the person you remember. Or at least the person you would remember if you did."
A hollow feeling ran through Sayaka, emptiness where there should have been emotion. This should've been a happy reunion, shouldn't it? But that was gone now, taken along with everything else she had been made to forget. Only impressions were left, echoes of the feelings that would have been right and correct-
"It's because of Homura," Sayaka growled before she even knew what she was doing. "She did this."
"She did." the voice confirmed. In contrast to Sayaka's impassioned accusation, they sounded almost lifeless.
"The question is, what are you going to do about it?"
Thunder cracked in the distance. Sayaka hadn't noticed when it began to rain, but the downpour that had come was too thick to even see through. The roads were probably flooded at this point.
"We've got to stop her, obviously."
"And what, exactly, do you intend to do to stop her? Would you kill Homura to fix things?"
The question, posed without a hint of emotion or change in manner of speaking, struck like a bucket of cold water over Sayaka's face. It felt for a moment like she was standing out in the rain instead of safe and warm inside.
"No! I don't… that wouldn't be right." The idea of seeing Homura dead, of killing her herself felt so viscerally wrong that Sayaka couldn't help but shout. She wanted to stop Homura, to defeat her, to undo whatever it is she's done that has made everything so deeply wrong, but killing her? Sayaka didn't want to kill anybody.
"Good to hear. With how much you've forgotten, I was worried you'd have lost something rather important."
The presence leaned forward, filling the room with a hollow, metallic creaking sound. Steel ground against steel as it laid a hand on Sayaka's shoulder. Something inside her shifted, a static tingle that had filled her body with such perfect uniformity that she hadn't even noticed it, and the light within her gathered under the presence's touch in the same way a pet leans into its owner's embrace. Potential blossomed as the light reached outward, unfurling into waves carrying with them a glorious crescendo of-
The creature withdrew its hard, and Sayaka stumbled forward. The strength that had rushed forward drained away, leaving her to lean against the windowsill for support. That had been…
Familiar. Important. Special.
It hurt that it was gone.
"My apologies." the voice said, unbelievable exhaustion leaking through their professional tone. "I have missed you all very much, but we must be cautious, and Homura would notice if you recovered your EGO."
"Ego? Isn't that some kinda psychology thing?" Sayaka asked, still steadying herself against the windowsill. Somebody had definitely explained it to her once, though she wasn't sure if this was something she'd been made to forget or just something she hadn't remembered. Psychology was not her best subject. Math and science were easy enough, since it was just memorizing some rules and then applying them, but once a subject got to a certain point where you just had to remember everything Sayaka started to have trouble.
"It is, but it also is not. I don't have time to get into it, we need to work quickly. What do you plan on doing?"
"I… well, I don't know. I don't think I can just go challenge Homura and make her fix everything." Sayaka considered it. Some part of her did want to get one over on the more experienced girl for once, but she couldn't imagine it going well. "What can I do?"
"I'll leave a list of materials and instructions for assembly when I leave. Just follow them, and I'll be able to intervene more directly. I'll also set up some partitions so Homura won't notice what you've remembered. But in the meantime..."
The light suffusing the room was without heat, without energy. Only illumination, revealing the truth for all to see. Sayaka shivered in the sudden cold.
"You are aware of Madoka Kaname?" Sayaka nodded. She was a transfer student, only arriving a couple days ago. Sayaka and her had talked a few times, she seemed nice enough. "Endeavor to keep her and Homura separate until I arrive. It wouldn't do to allow this sort of behavior to be rewarded."
The force holding Sayaka in place vanished, and almost against her will she wheeled around to see who had been speaking. There was a glimpse of something impossible, something towering and inhuman staring down at her without eyes, but then it was gone and she was alone in her room. True to the being's word, Sayaka could suddenly recall a long, detailed manual for some machine far too complicated for her to have actually memorized.
Sayaka closed with window. It felt cold. At least now she had something to work towards instead of stumbling blindly. At least she could do something.
First, she was going to need to find some way to get diazepam. She was pretty sure nobody was going to sell it to a fifteen-year-old.
