Comfort in Clorox
16th of July 2006 A.D.
"OK mom," you say instantly, though you still have every intention of bending that 'no rushing into danger' rule into a pretzel if someone is in danger where you can help them, but if it gives her more peace of mind what's the harm?
"OK..." she looks at you closely, suspicious of the quick agreement.
Crap, you need to give her something. Power burns unseen again, insight that turns the world to flowing glass in which the intentions and perceptions of all seem as clear as the noonday sun.
Lost 1 Essence
"I know your always going to worry about me, I know your always going to worry about all of us. Same with dad," you begin.
Her gaze gets softer less searching, then with the faintest shadow of a smile a smile: "I worry a lot more about
you than about your dad. Do you want the list of why that is by order of concern or alphabetized?"
You snort in laughter at the unexpected joke as you get into the car "Point made mom, point made." More seriously you add. "Can we talk, like really talk when we get home about this stuff?"
She nods and heads over to dad, from the look of concern and curiosity on Amanda's face they are going to have to field a lot of questions on the way back.
***
"Mom, dad I know both of you worry..." if not quite as much nor show it the same way, you don't add. "I've made armor and a shield to be safe and I'm willing to take any other reasonable precautions. It's not like I want to get hurt."
"You didn't want to sprain your wrist when you were nine either, you just
really wanted those cherries," mom points out. In your not so humble opinion it is really unfair that parents know all the silly things you did as a kid but you don't know theirs. It's not like you can ask mom's parents. At that you suddenly recall what dad had said about mom's family and the good-natured grousing drains out of your thoughts like water from a broken cup.
"I'm getting stronger, I have a way to heal even faster if it helps," you say quickly.
"What way?" dad asks, probably wondering if he is going to have to ask Harry for magic supplies.
Lost 1 Essence
"There really isn't a way to say this that isn't alarming so I'm just gonna say it OK?" Judging from the looks of trepidation on your parents' faces the lead up wasn't that reassuring.
"I heal really fast when I am immersed in impure and toxic liquids, they don't hurt of of course and I can even breathe in them safely," you explain quickly. "My power has an affinity to that which was cast off and impure, which kind of makes sense when you consider that one of the reasons I was able to take it up is because I failed, because I was imperfect."
"You didn't fail sweetie, that's not..." your mom starts, but you cut her off.
"Sure I did mom, I failed to get proper training for my magic, I failed to own up to even having it, I failed to consider the consequences of using magic to change how someone thinks and I failed to keep my mouth shut in Arctis Tor which distracted you," you rattle off. "I don't know much about the precise hows of the power I hold, but I am really sure the failure is important... it makes you sympathetic."
To what though, a part of you wonders, you are pretty sure it isn't the imperfections of your fellow man, even though you are fine with implying that to mom and dad if if makes them worry less.
Your mom gives a long heartfelt sigh and then glances up as if asking God for help, maybe for patience. "How toxic is toxic?" she asks at last.
"Lethal to an unprotected human, I'm pretty sure that less than that won't hurt me, but it won't heal and it won't recharge my reserves either," you shrug helplessly. "Look it's not my fault this works by Bizarro Logic..."
"Uriel called it an 'old treasure' Charity," your dad speaks before your mom can say anything. "I think it is fair to say that anything an angel would call old is more likely than not to work in ways we don't find intuitive."
"So what?" mom snaps. "I'm just supposed to have faith in this..." she waves your hand to a point generally above your head. "Whatever it is?"
The answer comes to you in a flash. "Mom do you have faith in the stove? Like the methane gas and the steel in the pipes and the principles that go into making it stove shaped? You don't right? That would be silly, but you trust that the company we got it from and the person who installed it know what they were doing. I would offer that an Archangel is a lot more likely to know what they are talking about than the stove makers and installers. He said it was my power to use for good or for ill, so it's not going to hurt me or lie to me."
"You should really think about going into law school," mom says at last.
And that is how you end up in the bath in your old bathing suit with a bath drawn and your mom holding a bottle of Clorox in a white-knuckled grip.
You go through all the ways to signal if if hurts three times then finally gets in and she starts to pour. At first you feel nothing, then an odd but not unpleasant tingle starting at your toes. A moment later the water starts to glimmer faintly green, the color of your anima. "I think it's ready," you say and before your mom can object you take a deep breath and slip under the surface of the poisoned water.
You don't need to breathe, you realize after a moment, there is no urge to let the air out and your eyes don't sting. It feels warm and safe under the water, like lying under a blankket on a lazy morning. You smile and wave at your mom.
She lets out the breath she had been holding. "Don't forget to clean the tub," she says on the way out.
About an hour through you lie in the embrace of tainted water and for a moment there you fall asleep, you dream of things that were and things that are and things that might be, you dream of yourself, real and potential joined like an ouroboros across time. On waking you do not recall the dream, but you are left with the faint niggling feeling that you have grown in ways even you do not yet know.
Gain 4 Essence
[] Write in shintai form
OOC: To be clear the shintai is based on Molly's subconscious and the nature and history of her Exaltation, you are not bound by what she would think of as reasonable consciously and once she actually takes the form in a moment of trial is will feel natural to her. She can still be upset by the reactions of others, but not by the form of the shintai itself as it is her innermost self. 
