- Location
- Three feet to the left
- Pronouns
- He/They
So, wait. Is Santa a bear or a human in this world?
A Hellfish flys again! ( a Simpsons X DVV CK2 Quest)
- Thread starter Ranger65
- Start date
- Pronouns
- Female
The Co-QMs can veto this if I am wrong, but I imagine (like CN Villains Victorious) there's just multiple Santas running around
Though I imagine they aren't literally at war like in CNVV lol
- Location
- Nice try
I imagine that by the very nature of this setting some things have to be removed or can't coexist togheter, like there's only one Santa. If there's one more it could create a paradox.
Same thing with the Sorcerer Aprentice and National Treasure, one of the main characters are essentially the same person therefore can't coexist without creating a paradox that threaten to destroy the timeline.
- Pronouns
- Female
I... Am not sure if you're joking or not, but to my knowledge the only thing National Treasure's MC and the mentor in Sorcerer's Apprentice have in common is... Both being played by Nic Cage lol
- Location
- Nice try
That's pretty much it, since both are played by the same actor both can't coexist at the same time.
I think is called Nicholas Cage Paradox.
- Location
- Three feet to the left
- Pronouns
- He/They
I kinda like the idea that there's a bunch of different Santas and they like, formed a union or something. They all decided to split the work and now they're all way happier.
EDIT: Unrelated, but if anyone cares, I remembered what the government probably stole out of Springfield: The Titan 2 missile under the woods.
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- Location
- Germany
I mean, theoretically there could be *one Santa for each "clade" of Sapient* - meaning the Simpsons Santa could be the Human Santa, while the Ducktales Santa could be the Anthro/"Therian" Santa...same for Devils, Krampuses etc...
Have them share a pseudo-Hive Mind and you´re golden^^
EDIT:
Either that or they ARE the same Santa, who just *takes on slightly-differently-behavign forms* to appeal to the different clades - meaning that to Humans, he appears as the Simpsons version, while he appears as the Ducktales version to Anthros
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- Pronouns
- He/They
This is my preferred explanation, at least with what we know so far.
- Location
- Germany
Mine too, tbh - "A Form you are comfortable with" is a trope for a reason...
- Location
- Three feet to the left
- Pronouns
- He/They
Hey, I got a weird question: would Burns and Wilhelm recognize each other? Burns did a lot of stuff for Germany back in the day.
I don't think so. His German connections are mostly tied to the Nazi's.
Then again, Wilhelm did live until 1941 i think, which is well into the nazi regime so its possible he heard about it
Now that i think of it, its not impossible he might think the nazis won, since he died at what was nearly their hight of power, and has no reason to know about the invasion of russia happening since i dont think he ever read mein kampf.
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One more reason to have him study History soon.
Also, I really wanna write that Omake where he reacts to what he missed already...the sheer amount of stereotypical German cursewords I can have him fling at the Nazis...
- Location
- Three feet to the left
- Pronouns
- He/They
I mean, noone around him is speaking German, and there are non white/yellow people around. I think he would have figured out Germany lost the war.
- Location
- Germany
That and he had a *low opinion* of "that Austrian painter´s" skills as a tactician/strategist and probably could see him overreaching in his arrogance coming from miles away.
So yeah, even if Wilhelm doesn´t know just what happened to the Third Reich in particular, context clues allow should allow him to make some educated guesses that things did not end well
- Location
- Three feet to the left
- Pronouns
- He/They
So, I was wondering what a critical success with talking to Doof would look like, and how that would even happen?
But then I remembered we sent Flanders. And Flanders is pretty read in on the situation with the Kings and how they rule America in all but name. Flanders is also extremely polite.
So it's possible we crit on that action because Flanders is the very first person to ever show Doof the proper amount of respect he's due.
But then I remembered we sent Flanders. And Flanders is pretty read in on the situation with the Kings and how they rule America in all but name. Flanders is also extremely polite.
So it's possible we crit on that action because Flanders is the very first person to ever show Doof the proper amount of respect he's due.
And a bribe of Flanders Cocoa couldn't hurt. Well unless Doof has some sort of grudge against Cocoa of course.
- Location
- Three feet to the left
- Pronouns
- He/They
"You see Nedward Flanders, it all began when I was a boy living in Drusselstein. My hated brother got to have hot cocoa. With little marshmallows, whipped cream, and even little sprinkles! It was beautiful! But! I wasn't allowed to have any hot cocoa! I was only given lukewarm ginger ale!
So I began to hate hot cocoa! Almost as much as I hated my brother! And that's why I had to destroy your hot cocoa."
"Gosh that's sad. Quick question: how come I could see all that stuff as you were talking about it?"
"That's just a thing I can do. Don't worry about it."
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Are you okay neighborino? (Canon!)
Well surprised these 2 haven't interacted yet in history.
Are you okay neighborino?
Homer sat there still within his work station, his mind more busy than usual.
Ever since the incident with the dome the relationship with his father was strained, more than usual.
Can you blame him on the other hand?, the man was actively aiming a shotgun to his face.
Then again the entire town was out for blood that day and he will admit that he does has a lot of responsability for that screw up, Marge already drilled than into him that day and when his mother finally came back after so long they did have a talk about it.
Well most like a slap to the face and a hug afterward, emotions were running high once that topic came out, still Homer felt like he got something he was missing for a long time during that time so he didn't mind it much.
Where was he now? ah right his relationship with his father.
He had refused to see the man face to face for a while now until recently, especially after he saved the kids.
After that he just couldn't push things aside any longer.
Things with his father has always been a mess if one where honest, they both had done horrible things to each other over the years, things he is sure both regret.
The scar on his left side where his kidney should be was a constant reminder of one of his own worst moments.
Only a heartless bastard would leave their father in their deathbed because he wasn't brave enough to go trough the operation.
He did it twice and that his father needed a kidney was his fault to begin with too.
But should he really give him a chance yet?
Sure he already did last visit, but things are still pretty akward between the two.
Years of emotional baggage don't just dissapear like that after all.
The things he said just ruined so much really, that he was a failure, that he would never be anything and god that they had to gave away Bongo never stopped hurting.
Then again he can blame that old coot of Burns for that, man it feels good to finally insult that walking corpse now that he isn't the boss anymore.
And yet, the man also gave him so much on his later years, he may not have been on board with him gunning for Marge during their starter years, but after a while he was all in for it.
Hell he is still grateful for two things to the oldman, giving him his life savings to pay his wedding with Marge and then selling both his house and classic car when they were going to have Lisa to buy that house on evergreen terrace.
Man relationships were complicated.
Now there is how they call it? right the elephant in the room.
It was a surprise when the news hit everyone that Burns had lost everything.
It was even more so that he lost said fortune to his dad.
Many on the plant were scared when that happened, Burns mostly kept them due to cutting corners and giving really two shits about everyone else in general as long as they made him money, reason of why Carl and Lenny decided to go the way they did until his father talked to them.
Homer on the other hand wasn't all that worried, his father may be many things, but when it came to money, it never really made him happy.
He still remembers the day lady from the retirement castle, Beatrice if he remembers correctly left him a lot of money.
He never understood really what was going on between those two, but when his father got the money, he could see he wasn't truly happy.
Then came his time to stop his father from commiting a mistake on that casino.
Stopping that bet on 36 for then the roullette to land on 00 was something both of them will never forget.
Money at this point was something his father never cared for unless it was to help someone else.
And boy did he start helping, the repairs of the city went so quickly thanks to his dad, he actually spent back into the power plant to make stuff more safe for them and even give them proper paychecks and bonuses, like Carl and Lenny said it was actually fun to show up to work now.
He even saved Moe's bar from closing down, Moe had been quite troughout with them the night before his father bought the place, unless a miracle happened they all would have to search a new place to drink.
Maybe he should start listening to Marge and his mother advice to give his father a more troughout chance.
And yet a part of him still doubts if he should do it
Just what he should do?
''Hi diddly ho neighborino'' a familiar annoying voice interrupts Homer thinking.
And he remembers that certain man is now a worker here instead of just his neighbour ''Hi Flanders what do you want'' Homer says in his usual tone when addressing to his mostly annoying neighbour.
''Well I was just passing by and said to myself hey Ned why don't you check in your good old neighbour Homer and see how he is doing'' Ned flanders said in his usual polite and sanctimonious.
''As in a work inspection.?'' Homer said with a little fear in his voice, he knows well he doesn't do right his job, hell his name and face were in the dictionary for good reasons for that dumb luck when handling those meltdowns.
''No, no, no, nothing like that, to be honest this is mostly a personal visit on my part to check on you, especially after what happened at Kamp Krusty'' Ned said in a sincere worried tone.
Homer touched his arm at the mention of said events, that fish guy seriously manhandled them as he still feels some pain from the wounds from that fight and if it wasn't for whoever was the guy throwing those sleeping darts he is sure that fish guy would had made minced meat with every single one of them.
Not that he letting Flanders know that ''Oh... yeah, I am fine, nothing to worry about really'' Homer said in an akward tone, it was still strange having his neighbour as a work partner, much less his superior, so he couldn't just say the usual stupid Flanders within plant.
''Nice to hear neighborino, was worried since well not only you had to see what your kids went trough, but I heard from your father and the news that you also got involved in the fight with the head honcho of that mess and well the injuries everyone came back with weren't really pretty'' Ned responded still worried about Homer.
''Yeah, don't worry as I said, I just feel a little sting on my arm, but Doctor Hibbert said it should go away by the end of the month'' Homer said back in a more cordial tone.
After that there was an akward silence for some seconds, as Ned Flanders still didn't go away.
So Homer decided to break the ice, he was still curious why Flanders was even working here after all ''So Flanders, why are you even working here? I though that after the mess with the dome you would have gone back to your shop'' Homer said in a curious shop.
At that Ned looked down in sadness and said ''Well sadly that wasn't going to be possible, I had to declare the leftorium on bankrupt after the dome, do not worry it wasn't anything related to the dome, to be honest the leftorium wasn't doing great for months before the incident and with the advent of stuff like online shopping, well it was something coming for a while now, the dome just kinda speeded up things, it is sad you know, you helped me so much back in the day to make the store a success and now it is gone forever''.
That's right, back when Flanders opened the store it was a total bust.
It really hurt Homer heart seeing his neighbour having to live in his car with his entire family, the thing of going to live with his sister in capitol city was probably not fully truthful either considering that when Flanders put him away from the car he said he pretty much was ruined.
''Heh, you know I don't think I ever thanked you enough for that day Homer, you saved my store, my house, my life in general really, I am more than sure I wouldn't be here today if it wasn't for you'' Ned said in a honest tone.
When Homer thinks about it his relationship with his neighbour has always been strange, one day he may hate him, the other he wishes for his neighbour to be well.
And after the dome well the man had made him think about certain stuff, what the hell he may as well say it now ''To be fair Flanders I may also have to thank you, you have also done some stuff for me and recently made me think on certain stuff and I am thankful for that'' Homer admits honestly to his neighbour.
After the dome he really came to see how strained his relationship with Bart was when he prefered being with Flanders over him for a time until they had to blow up the dome, he should probably try to get closer to his kids and stop being a jerkass from time to time with them.
He is gonna miss his Jerkass Homer cigars, but it is probably a sacrifice he will need to do.
At least it is his beloved duff beer.
''Hehe, what are neighbours for, want to know something funny Homer?'' Ned said to his friend.
Homer was curious, Ned was normally saint like and his sense of humor is down the dumps, meh he will entertain him.
''It may be a sin, but sometimes I envy you'' Ned said honestly to Homer.
Homer was with his jaw down the floor at those words, Flanders the springfield high bar envious of him? ''Wha, but, whe, why?'' Homer tried to say still shocked.
''Well after Maude death it has been hard, I know we may not share thinking about certain things, but despite that everytime I see life kicking you down, you somehow are still able to stand up despite all that, for my part it took a long while to even be able to look up again waiting for a good day knowing Maude was no longer with me and oh god do I regret some stuff I did after her death, especially what happened with Rachel, then there is your parents, I may not know what your personal life with them was before, but I can tell mister Abe and Miss Mona still care a lot about you, wish I could say the same about those lazy beatniks, I tried so many times to reconnect with them, but it is just so difficult, same could be said about my sister, she followed so close in their steps, we are in talking terms, but mostly out of tolerance really, then there is the kids, I may not support how you raise them up, but when I was taking care of Bart, I saw a spark in him, same I could say about Lisa or little Maggie, there is just something with them that I feel my little angels are missing, you know I think I came here not only to check on you, but deep down also for advice'' Ned finished his rambling.
Honestly Homer never saw this coming, especially not someone like Ned, a part of Homer didn't want to deal with this if he was honest, but his shoulder angel was saying that he could throw Ned a bone or two.
Well it would be rude to shoot down a man who actively seeked you out for advice ''Wow, Flanders that is a lot to digest, but let's get straight to the point what kind of advice'' Homer said.
''Thanks Homer I knew I could count on you, as for the advice, well you see I started to try blind dating once again and just met a wonderful woman'' Ned said to which Homer interrupted.
''Haha way to go Flanders, so you want dating advice'' Homer said as his eyebrows raised up and down.
''Hehe, no not that Homer, it is still to early, I just had my first date in a long time and I still don't know if I want to compromise into something yet, but the thing is that she has kids, I met two of them during that date and I couldn't help but notice that they have the same spark that Bart had when I saw them, it is making me wonder if I am really being a good father to Rod and Todd? just what I did to make them so different from kids their age?, I don't know I am just scared how the kids will react to me when they know I am trying to meet a new partner again, I just don't want to leave them out of a important event as this'' Ned questioned himself on his pareting skills.
It took Homer a while to process and give an answer to Ned, since honestly this was a mess and a half
Let's see Rod and Todd, Flanders kids, goody two shoes like their dad, easy to take adventage off, got raised by the man who couldn't really fight back for a good while as it took a good amount of time to reach his breaking point and their mother was missing.
If Homer was fair it was probably the later two, he cannot remember much about the mess that made Flanders go kaboom in a fit of rage, but he can remember that before that day Flanders honestly couldn't hate anything until he made him say he hated the postal office and his anger.
And boy does he also has experience with a missing mother.
''Flanders if you want my honest opinion I think your family needs a therapist for that mess'' Homer said straight to Ned.
''Wha-, are you really sure about that, don't think I ever done anything that bad to warrant it'' Ned tried to refute.
''Ned, you wanted my advice and now you are going to damn well get it, just think about it, because I did and you will do it too because you made me, those kids were raised by Ned Flanders, the guy who couldn't really express itself for a good while thanks to that stupid teraphy that I cannot remember the name off, you suppresed some emotions for so much time it doesn't take a genius to know that must have affected something, then you have that their mother is missing for a good time now, take it from someone who was missing his for a good amount of his life until recently, we tend to hide things when that happens, I couldn't really talk to my father back then mostly due to it being a bitter memory to him, but your kids probably feel the same about their mother, they need someone else other than you to talk to, someone other than god, they need actual human interaction if you really want to know what is wrong'' Homer said honestly to Ned as he took him from the shoulders.
Ned stood there a good while taking into account Homer words, he wanted to refute them, he really did, but he had to admit he wasn't wrong.
The University of Minnesota Spankalogical Protocol did a good number on him, not only he wasn't able to fully get angry for a long while, but also a lot of repressed memories from his childhood and considering Rod and Todd grew up with him stuck that way it may be worth looking into that.
As for what he told him about Maude being missing from the lives of the kids, was it really that bad that they couldn't even talk to god? he knows he asked for his advice, but to really consider therapy, well Homer was right about one that, he asked for this.
''... I still I don't know Homer, therapy seems a bit much, but I will take your word for it, I will keep it in mind for the future, but still thanks for throwing this old hound a bone'' Ned said doubtful about the idea, but accepting of it.
''Good, but don't get used to it'' Homer went back to his usual tone with Flanders.
''...Look let me show you something'' At that Homer took his neighbor and putted him in front of a part that was hanging radiation suits.
Then he noticed the hanger had wheels and when he moved it, the only thing Ned Flanders could feel was happiness.
After all the wall was filled with Photos of little Maggie and all of them covered a sign, he may never know what it said originally, but the message it said now will forever be ingrained in his memory.
DO IT FOR HER.
''This is the only thing that really kept me going into working in this place, Smithers saw it once and told me to take it down, so I did the best other thing and hid it behind the radiation suits, he never bothered to check what was behind it so my ass was safe, thinking about it I may be able to put it in display again with that bootlicker out there with the walking corpse, but look don't take my advice as one for yourself, but one you should do for the sake of your kids, if nothing is really wrong you can tell me to my face I told you so, but if I am right, just be sure to be there for them''. Homer said in the most sincere tone for his neighbour.
Ned just stood there contemplating and thinking, Homer was right, he should probably try it, not just for his sake, but for that of Rod and Todd.
Before they could say another thing Ned watch sounded off ''Well would you look at the time I need to go, your father wanted me to go and meet a very important person and if I go now I should be there a day before the meeting is scheluded, hehehe, well gotta go see ya later neighborino''
''Later Flanders'' at that Homer just waved at Flanders back, going back to minding his own bussines.
To be honest he forgot already what he was thinking before, meh it will come back to him eventually.
Hmm that peptalk did left him hungry, well it is almost lunch time, he doubts anyone will mind if he goes 5 minutes before to assault the donut box.
Are you okay neighborino?
Homer sat there still within his work station, his mind more busy than usual.
Ever since the incident with the dome the relationship with his father was strained, more than usual.
Can you blame him on the other hand?, the man was actively aiming a shotgun to his face.
Then again the entire town was out for blood that day and he will admit that he does has a lot of responsability for that screw up, Marge already drilled than into him that day and when his mother finally came back after so long they did have a talk about it.
Well most like a slap to the face and a hug afterward, emotions were running high once that topic came out, still Homer felt like he got something he was missing for a long time during that time so he didn't mind it much.
Where was he now? ah right his relationship with his father.
He had refused to see the man face to face for a while now until recently, especially after he saved the kids.
After that he just couldn't push things aside any longer.
Things with his father has always been a mess if one where honest, they both had done horrible things to each other over the years, things he is sure both regret.
The scar on his left side where his kidney should be was a constant reminder of one of his own worst moments.
Only a heartless bastard would leave their father in their deathbed because he wasn't brave enough to go trough the operation.
He did it twice and that his father needed a kidney was his fault to begin with too.
But should he really give him a chance yet?
Sure he already did last visit, but things are still pretty akward between the two.
Years of emotional baggage don't just dissapear like that after all.
The things he said just ruined so much really, that he was a failure, that he would never be anything and god that they had to gave away Bongo never stopped hurting.
Then again he can blame that old coot of Burns for that, man it feels good to finally insult that walking corpse now that he isn't the boss anymore.
And yet, the man also gave him so much on his later years, he may not have been on board with him gunning for Marge during their starter years, but after a while he was all in for it.
Hell he is still grateful for two things to the oldman, giving him his life savings to pay his wedding with Marge and then selling both his house and classic car when they were going to have Lisa to buy that house on evergreen terrace.
Man relationships were complicated.
Now there is how they call it? right the elephant in the room.
It was a surprise when the news hit everyone that Burns had lost everything.
It was even more so that he lost said fortune to his dad.
Many on the plant were scared when that happened, Burns mostly kept them due to cutting corners and giving really two shits about everyone else in general as long as they made him money, reason of why Carl and Lenny decided to go the way they did until his father talked to them.
Homer on the other hand wasn't all that worried, his father may be many things, but when it came to money, it never really made him happy.
He still remembers the day lady from the retirement castle, Beatrice if he remembers correctly left him a lot of money.
He never understood really what was going on between those two, but when his father got the money, he could see he wasn't truly happy.
Then came his time to stop his father from commiting a mistake on that casino.
Stopping that bet on 36 for then the roullette to land on 00 was something both of them will never forget.
Money at this point was something his father never cared for unless it was to help someone else.
And boy did he start helping, the repairs of the city went so quickly thanks to his dad, he actually spent back into the power plant to make stuff more safe for them and even give them proper paychecks and bonuses, like Carl and Lenny said it was actually fun to show up to work now.
He even saved Moe's bar from closing down, Moe had been quite troughout with them the night before his father bought the place, unless a miracle happened they all would have to search a new place to drink.
Maybe he should start listening to Marge and his mother advice to give his father a more troughout chance.
And yet a part of him still doubts if he should do it
Just what he should do?
''Hi diddly ho neighborino'' a familiar annoying voice interrupts Homer thinking.
And he remembers that certain man is now a worker here instead of just his neighbour ''Hi Flanders what do you want'' Homer says in his usual tone when addressing to his mostly annoying neighbour.
''Well I was just passing by and said to myself hey Ned why don't you check in your good old neighbour Homer and see how he is doing'' Ned flanders said in his usual polite and sanctimonious.
''As in a work inspection.?'' Homer said with a little fear in his voice, he knows well he doesn't do right his job, hell his name and face were in the dictionary for good reasons for that dumb luck when handling those meltdowns.
''No, no, no, nothing like that, to be honest this is mostly a personal visit on my part to check on you, especially after what happened at Kamp Krusty'' Ned said in a sincere worried tone.
Homer touched his arm at the mention of said events, that fish guy seriously manhandled them as he still feels some pain from the wounds from that fight and if it wasn't for whoever was the guy throwing those sleeping darts he is sure that fish guy would had made minced meat with every single one of them.
Not that he letting Flanders know that ''Oh... yeah, I am fine, nothing to worry about really'' Homer said in an akward tone, it was still strange having his neighbour as a work partner, much less his superior, so he couldn't just say the usual stupid Flanders within plant.
''Nice to hear neighborino, was worried since well not only you had to see what your kids went trough, but I heard from your father and the news that you also got involved in the fight with the head honcho of that mess and well the injuries everyone came back with weren't really pretty'' Ned responded still worried about Homer.
''Yeah, don't worry as I said, I just feel a little sting on my arm, but Doctor Hibbert said it should go away by the end of the month'' Homer said back in a more cordial tone.
After that there was an akward silence for some seconds, as Ned Flanders still didn't go away.
So Homer decided to break the ice, he was still curious why Flanders was even working here after all ''So Flanders, why are you even working here? I though that after the mess with the dome you would have gone back to your shop'' Homer said in a curious shop.
At that Ned looked down in sadness and said ''Well sadly that wasn't going to be possible, I had to declare the leftorium on bankrupt after the dome, do not worry it wasn't anything related to the dome, to be honest the leftorium wasn't doing great for months before the incident and with the advent of stuff like online shopping, well it was something coming for a while now, the dome just kinda speeded up things, it is sad you know, you helped me so much back in the day to make the store a success and now it is gone forever''.
That's right, back when Flanders opened the store it was a total bust.
It really hurt Homer heart seeing his neighbour having to live in his car with his entire family, the thing of going to live with his sister in capitol city was probably not fully truthful either considering that when Flanders put him away from the car he said he pretty much was ruined.
''Heh, you know I don't think I ever thanked you enough for that day Homer, you saved my store, my house, my life in general really, I am more than sure I wouldn't be here today if it wasn't for you'' Ned said in a honest tone.
When Homer thinks about it his relationship with his neighbour has always been strange, one day he may hate him, the other he wishes for his neighbour to be well.
And after the dome well the man had made him think about certain stuff, what the hell he may as well say it now ''To be fair Flanders I may also have to thank you, you have also done some stuff for me and recently made me think on certain stuff and I am thankful for that'' Homer admits honestly to his neighbour.
After the dome he really came to see how strained his relationship with Bart was when he prefered being with Flanders over him for a time until they had to blow up the dome, he should probably try to get closer to his kids and stop being a jerkass from time to time with them.
He is gonna miss his Jerkass Homer cigars, but it is probably a sacrifice he will need to do.
At least it is his beloved duff beer.
''Hehe, what are neighbours for, want to know something funny Homer?'' Ned said to his friend.
Homer was curious, Ned was normally saint like and his sense of humor is down the dumps, meh he will entertain him.
''It may be a sin, but sometimes I envy you'' Ned said honestly to Homer.
Homer was with his jaw down the floor at those words, Flanders the springfield high bar envious of him? ''Wha, but, whe, why?'' Homer tried to say still shocked.
''Well after Maude death it has been hard, I know we may not share thinking about certain things, but despite that everytime I see life kicking you down, you somehow are still able to stand up despite all that, for my part it took a long while to even be able to look up again waiting for a good day knowing Maude was no longer with me and oh god do I regret some stuff I did after her death, especially what happened with Rachel, then there is your parents, I may not know what your personal life with them was before, but I can tell mister Abe and Miss Mona still care a lot about you, wish I could say the same about those lazy beatniks, I tried so many times to reconnect with them, but it is just so difficult, same could be said about my sister, she followed so close in their steps, we are in talking terms, but mostly out of tolerance really, then there is the kids, I may not support how you raise them up, but when I was taking care of Bart, I saw a spark in him, same I could say about Lisa or little Maggie, there is just something with them that I feel my little angels are missing, you know I think I came here not only to check on you, but deep down also for advice'' Ned finished his rambling.
Honestly Homer never saw this coming, especially not someone like Ned, a part of Homer didn't want to deal with this if he was honest, but his shoulder angel was saying that he could throw Ned a bone or two.
Well it would be rude to shoot down a man who actively seeked you out for advice ''Wow, Flanders that is a lot to digest, but let's get straight to the point what kind of advice'' Homer said.
''Thanks Homer I knew I could count on you, as for the advice, well you see I started to try blind dating once again and just met a wonderful woman'' Ned said to which Homer interrupted.
''Haha way to go Flanders, so you want dating advice'' Homer said as his eyebrows raised up and down.
''Hehe, no not that Homer, it is still to early, I just had my first date in a long time and I still don't know if I want to compromise into something yet, but the thing is that she has kids, I met two of them during that date and I couldn't help but notice that they have the same spark that Bart had when I saw them, it is making me wonder if I am really being a good father to Rod and Todd? just what I did to make them so different from kids their age?, I don't know I am just scared how the kids will react to me when they know I am trying to meet a new partner again, I just don't want to leave them out of a important event as this'' Ned questioned himself on his pareting skills.
It took Homer a while to process and give an answer to Ned, since honestly this was a mess and a half
Let's see Rod and Todd, Flanders kids, goody two shoes like their dad, easy to take adventage off, got raised by the man who couldn't really fight back for a good while as it took a good amount of time to reach his breaking point and their mother was missing.
If Homer was fair it was probably the later two, he cannot remember much about the mess that made Flanders go kaboom in a fit of rage, but he can remember that before that day Flanders honestly couldn't hate anything until he made him say he hated the postal office and his anger.
And boy does he also has experience with a missing mother.
''Flanders if you want my honest opinion I think your family needs a therapist for that mess'' Homer said straight to Ned.
''Wha-, are you really sure about that, don't think I ever done anything that bad to warrant it'' Ned tried to refute.
''Ned, you wanted my advice and now you are going to damn well get it, just think about it, because I did and you will do it too because you made me, those kids were raised by Ned Flanders, the guy who couldn't really express itself for a good while thanks to that stupid teraphy that I cannot remember the name off, you suppresed some emotions for so much time it doesn't take a genius to know that must have affected something, then you have that their mother is missing for a good time now, take it from someone who was missing his for a good amount of his life until recently, we tend to hide things when that happens, I couldn't really talk to my father back then mostly due to it being a bitter memory to him, but your kids probably feel the same about their mother, they need someone else other than you to talk to, someone other than god, they need actual human interaction if you really want to know what is wrong'' Homer said honestly to Ned as he took him from the shoulders.
Ned stood there a good while taking into account Homer words, he wanted to refute them, he really did, but he had to admit he wasn't wrong.
The University of Minnesota Spankalogical Protocol did a good number on him, not only he wasn't able to fully get angry for a long while, but also a lot of repressed memories from his childhood and considering Rod and Todd grew up with him stuck that way it may be worth looking into that.
As for what he told him about Maude being missing from the lives of the kids, was it really that bad that they couldn't even talk to god? he knows he asked for his advice, but to really consider therapy, well Homer was right about one that, he asked for this.
''... I still I don't know Homer, therapy seems a bit much, but I will take your word for it, I will keep it in mind for the future, but still thanks for throwing this old hound a bone'' Ned said doubtful about the idea, but accepting of it.
''Good, but don't get used to it'' Homer went back to his usual tone with Flanders.
''...Look let me show you something'' At that Homer took his neighbor and putted him in front of a part that was hanging radiation suits.
Then he noticed the hanger had wheels and when he moved it, the only thing Ned Flanders could feel was happiness.
After all the wall was filled with Photos of little Maggie and all of them covered a sign, he may never know what it said originally, but the message it said now will forever be ingrained in his memory.
DO IT FOR HER.
''This is the only thing that really kept me going into working in this place, Smithers saw it once and told me to take it down, so I did the best other thing and hid it behind the radiation suits, he never bothered to check what was behind it so my ass was safe, thinking about it I may be able to put it in display again with that bootlicker out there with the walking corpse, but look don't take my advice as one for yourself, but one you should do for the sake of your kids, if nothing is really wrong you can tell me to my face I told you so, but if I am right, just be sure to be there for them''. Homer said in the most sincere tone for his neighbour.
Ned just stood there contemplating and thinking, Homer was right, he should probably try it, not just for his sake, but for that of Rod and Todd.
Before they could say another thing Ned watch sounded off ''Well would you look at the time I need to go, your father wanted me to go and meet a very important person and if I go now I should be there a day before the meeting is scheluded, hehehe, well gotta go see ya later neighborino''
''Later Flanders'' at that Homer just waved at Flanders back, going back to minding his own bussines.
To be honest he forgot already what he was thinking before, meh it will come back to him eventually.
Hmm that peptalk did left him hungry, well it is almost lunch time, he doubts anyone will mind if he goes 5 minutes before to assault the donut box.
Well another omake, this time with an interaction we honestly should have done before between Homer and Flanders.
This is mostly a little after the adventure of Kamp Krusty but before Ned meeting with Doof.
TBH Homer and Flanders relationship is a lot more complicated and deep that one can see on the surfarce.
Like they may not see eye to eye on some stuff and Homer may think of Flanders as the most annoying person on the earth, while Flanders constantly tries to not see Homer defects.
But if they do something quite a lot is to confide in each other on the heat of the moment.
Mostly started writting Homer thougs a little bit after the encounter with his father where they are finally trying to bury the hatchet, things are still akward at the moment.
But Homer can at least admit that while Abe has done horrible stuff, Homer has also paid him back on the same.
Seriously once you think of it realistically that episode where Abe is left twice on his deadbed is horrible.
But Homer can also remember what his father has done for him, stuff like giving you everything for your wedding and your house is not something you easily forget.
There is how he knows that his father will do good with the money, he still remembers clearly the time he stopped him from betting everything on the roulette.
As for Flanders, he honestly wanted to just check on Homer after the Kamp Krusty adventure, but both he and Homer can get quite emotional when a conversation between them gets going.
And no doubt they would think of each other after so many lived adventures, no doubt Flanders still feels he has a debt to Homer after the leftorium.
And also notices the differences between well Rod and Todd and the rest of the other kids their ages, Flanders may blind himself in faith, but even then he knowss he can confide in certain people his doubts.
One of them being Homer, that being a good idea or not depends from time to time.
But Homer if he starts thinking can see 2 glaring problems with Ned kids, those being that they were raised by the man who he was before hurricane Neddy and honestly see some part of himself on Flanders kids due to them missing their mom.
God knows he has memories of that.
He knows that Flanders honestly needs a therapist for his entire famly in this mess instead of just confiding in close friends.
Ned still has doubts of course, but if Homer also knows something is to sometimes suck up your own pride and accept you need to do something you may not like for the sake of your kids.
He has been doing that for a long part of his life due to Maggie.
Well hope everyone enjoys this omake and that I got Homer and Flanders right.
This is mostly a little after the adventure of Kamp Krusty but before Ned meeting with Doof.
TBH Homer and Flanders relationship is a lot more complicated and deep that one can see on the surfarce.
Like they may not see eye to eye on some stuff and Homer may think of Flanders as the most annoying person on the earth, while Flanders constantly tries to not see Homer defects.
But if they do something quite a lot is to confide in each other on the heat of the moment.
Mostly started writting Homer thougs a little bit after the encounter with his father where they are finally trying to bury the hatchet, things are still akward at the moment.
But Homer can at least admit that while Abe has done horrible stuff, Homer has also paid him back on the same.
Seriously once you think of it realistically that episode where Abe is left twice on his deadbed is horrible.
But Homer can also remember what his father has done for him, stuff like giving you everything for your wedding and your house is not something you easily forget.
There is how he knows that his father will do good with the money, he still remembers clearly the time he stopped him from betting everything on the roulette.
As for Flanders, he honestly wanted to just check on Homer after the Kamp Krusty adventure, but both he and Homer can get quite emotional when a conversation between them gets going.
And no doubt they would think of each other after so many lived adventures, no doubt Flanders still feels he has a debt to Homer after the leftorium.
And also notices the differences between well Rod and Todd and the rest of the other kids their ages, Flanders may blind himself in faith, but even then he knowss he can confide in certain people his doubts.
One of them being Homer, that being a good idea or not depends from time to time.
But Homer if he starts thinking can see 2 glaring problems with Ned kids, those being that they were raised by the man who he was before hurricane Neddy and honestly see some part of himself on Flanders kids due to them missing their mom.
God knows he has memories of that.
He knows that Flanders honestly needs a therapist for his entire famly in this mess instead of just confiding in close friends.
Ned still has doubts of course, but if Homer also knows something is to sometimes suck up your own pride and accept you need to do something you may not like for the sake of your kids.
He has been doing that for a long part of his life due to Maggie.
Well hope everyone enjoys this omake and that I got Homer and Flanders right.
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- Pronouns
- Female
A bunch of random Hellfish skits;
Crumbs: Mr. Simpson, may I be frank with you?
Abe; Of course.
*Crumbs turns himself into a hot dog*
Abe: ...Get the fuck out of my office.
X
Chief Wiggum: *after Webby has accidentally stolen some candy* Vanderquack, come out!
Webby: *from her hiding spot* It's probably too early for labels, but I don't think what I had with Lena was totally platonic!
Wiggum: Not what I meant, but we support you!
X
Hunter: Sometimes it just feels like no one wants to be my friend...
Lena: Totally can't relate. But you know who no one likes? Oh Frink!
Frink: First off, how dare you-
X
Hunter: You ever just go to bed and wake up and think, like, 'What am I doing here? Why was this good luck wasted on me'?
Lena: Duh. Who doesn't?
Apu: ... Most well adjusted, mentally healthy people.
Crumbs: Mr. Simpson, may I be frank with you?
Abe; Of course.
*Crumbs turns himself into a hot dog*
Abe: ...Get the fuck out of my office.
X
Chief Wiggum: *after Webby has accidentally stolen some candy* Vanderquack, come out!
Webby: *from her hiding spot* It's probably too early for labels, but I don't think what I had with Lena was totally platonic!
Wiggum: Not what I meant, but we support you!
X
Hunter: Sometimes it just feels like no one wants to be my friend...
Lena: Totally can't relate. But you know who no one likes? Oh Frink!
Frink: First off, how dare you-
X
Hunter: You ever just go to bed and wake up and think, like, 'What am I doing here? Why was this good luck wasted on me'?
Lena: Duh. Who doesn't?
Apu: ... Most well adjusted, mentally healthy people.
Frink rolls up with a robot posse programmed to like him and think he's cool.
Drakken: You see! It's not just me, robotic friends are clearly an untapped market!
Shego: I am not having this discussion again, your Bebe Bots were creepy and I'm not letting you try and "work out the kinks" in them! Aso fuck you for making me think the word kinks in relation to your robot girlfriends.
Draken: oh c'mon weebs and the japanese will pay big bucks for robot girlfriends, and we would be racking in millions!
Shego: NO! if those losers want a girlfriend, then do the work and earn one!
- Location
- Three feet to the left
- Pronouns
- He/They
Bart, holding a gun: Tell me the name of God, you ancient piece of shit!
Burns: Can you feel your heart burning? Can you feel the struggle within? The fear within me is greater than anything your soul can produce. You cannot kill me in a way that matters.
Bart: I'M NOT FUCKING SCARED OF YOU!
Springfield Prison Blues (canon!)
Springfield Prison Blues
"Lucille Botzcowski, this court finds you guilty on all counts. I hereby sentence you to twenty years in Springfield Maximum Security Prison." With the verdict delivered, Judge Snyder banged his gavel before motioning for the bailiff to take the future inmate away. To her credit Lucille didn't raise a fuss about it, simply standing and letting the glorified mall cop lead her away towards the van that would bring her and the handful of other inmates who'd been sentenced today to the place that would be their home for the foreseeable future.
"That's what I get for going with a public defender," Lucille grumbled to herself as she sat on the bench, her hands cuffed in front of her just like everyone else. He hadn't been Lionel Hutz, but that was about the best that one could say about him. Burns hadn't been willing to shell out any more of Ziff's money to get her someone competent though, and she hadn't been willing to give up any of her ill-gotten loot either, so it was off to prison with her.
Still, Lucille mused to herself, it wasn't as though this would keep her down for long; she gave it a week before she'd get out of the absolute dumpster fire that was Springfield's only real prison. The only real question was how she'd take her leave; one of the many tunnels that honeycombed through the walls? Or perhaps she'd hide in a laundry basket and get smuggled out that way? She had options, and nothing but time to decide which one to go with. And once she was out she'd make sure to join back up with Burns' crew and go twice as hard against those damned Simpsons! Burns might have been a smug prick, but they were starting to get a good thing going and vengeance would soon be theirs!
The thief was sprung from her revenge fantasies when the prison van came to a stop, signaling that their ride had come to an end. A prison guard unlocked the van's rear door and started to lead them out. Lucille took one step out, landing on the dirt with a thud, before looking up and coming to a complete stop. "What the fuck is that?" SHe asked, the sight before her completely unlike the prison she'd been expecting.
Instead of the usual, barely there security the prison had the last time she'd been inside, the prison was actually looking like a serious facility. Barbed wire, guard towers, the whole nine yards. There was a sinking feeling in Lucille's gut as the guard prodded her to keep moving, but she shook it off. Obviously all this was just cosmetic crap, there was no way anyone had actually been willing to ruin the good thing the assorted crooks of Springfield had going…Right?
A week later, Lucille was starting to worry that the new security measures were actually going to last. Apparently some cape had gotten himself caught and the prison had been all but remade to handle him. She cursed her luck at being one of the first people to 'enjoy' the additions to the prison. It seemed like whoever had been in charge of the new security was actually serious; all the tunnels that she knew of had been sealed up, and apparently a bunch that she hadn't known about were as well for good measure. And her attempt to sneak out with the laundry had failed because apparently the guards were actually vaguely competent now and checked! She'd even heard of a guy who'd tried to break the cape out to improve his odds of escape, and apparently he'd ended up in the hospital!
The sinking feeling had returned with a vengeance, and Lucille gripped the bars of her cell with a despairing look on her face, all while someone in her block played the harmonica badly. Forget her crimes, whoever was butchering the Man in Black was the real criminal here!
Going back to her bed and laying on it, Lucille tried to keep calm despite the situation. Surely Burns would get her out, right? After all she'd been loyal and even successful in her tasks. Sure that old fool had ripped her operation out tooth and nail after only a few months, but surely that was worth something…Right?
Lucille Botzcowski did her best to not cry as she realized just how deep in it she was. Twenty years might technically not be that long to be in prison, but she wasn't exactly a spring chicken; by the time she'd get out she'd probably be too old to do anything but waste away in an assisted living home! What had she ever done to deserve this awful situation?
Yes, what did Lucille ever do to deserve this? Other than all the crimes, and entering a criminal conspiracy that would, if successful, lead to the deaths of multiple people, including children? Victimless crimes!