Shadowofdeath
DUKE OF DEATH
- Location
- North Las Vegas Nevada
That takes we are one to a whole new level
With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Twelve)
- Thread starter Mr Zoat
- Start date
- Status
CrackedCosmonaut
I am not angry.
- Location
- East
Sigh....was holding out for Battlestar Galactica....
There's always next year. And it shouldn't take more than a decade to get to next year in-story...
Nice resolution.
Also I note Paul finally mastered the 'noone will be sure you did anything at all' approach.
Guess even Power Ring memory buff gets a little strained after thousands of years.
Hope this was the time travel episode we were promised/threatened with. It was well handled.
Jackercracks
In a British accent
- Location
- England
AHHHHH! We were in the future!? AGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Nashk
Tyrant of Kyushu
- Location
- Kyoshi Island
I love villain protagonists. Your story reminds me of a manga called Aiki.
The "protagonist" is a guy so strong that at a young age his grandfather (a doctor) decided to disalign his joints all over his body to Limit his power level. If he wassnt a bastard before that he turned absolute asshole after.
He's a pervert, a jerk, and really doesn't care about anything but pleasing himself.
Was still fun to read him trying to teach others though.
XkaliburRage
Perpetual Procrastinator
I read a bit of Aiki and that is very a comedic series. The thing he's describing is something that needs to be killed with fire.
You forgot about the sister subplot. And how the Golden Boy was more Hardcore(captialization required) than he was. Which culminated in a temple duel complete with shuriken, Bojutsu and the protag shitting himself.
Also. Golden Boy was like the scary devoted to their Martial Art types that made him somewhat more inhuman than the protag. Because a perfect warrior who didn't really care about his girl getting raped is somehow worse off than the rapist.
Also. I stopped around the part where he ran away to Hong Kong and fought in pit fights while whoring himself out.
All to pay for his long lost sister's medical bills. (Who had OD'd on drugs while working as a hooker).
He found her when she propositioned him for sex. Which he accepted so without knowing it was her.
The reveal happens later. I'm just not sure when.
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Nashk
Tyrant of Kyushu
- Location
- Kyoshi Island
Aiki extorted women, pretended to trade sex in exchange for teaching a young girl, then pretended he never made the deal.
He kills, cheats, and is an overall bastard who only fight for fun. It's a comedy series, but by no means is the protagonist any less of a villain.
Later on he mellowed out, by helping to fight a war in a foreign country. For his apprentice or something.
XkaliburRage
Perpetual Procrastinator
But it isn't at all portrayed in a realistic way or anything. I can't really take all the bad things he does at face value when the world itself doesn't really take itself seriously. It's all just comedy to me.
Anyway this is getting a tad off-topic, so PM if you want to discuss further.
On the one hand.... well that means the BLight thing is cannon... on the other hand it also mean the MLP x-over is also potentially future cannon.... which.... I do not care for (As it pretty much nixes teh chance for the mane 6 to form up)... on the third hand since Blight is also from 20th century earth, than it implies that future!Paul is dimesional hopping, further reinforced byt he fact that Gravyen!paul is delaing with SUnset shimmer.... so I can console myself with saying OL!paul went to a alternate Equestria and can ignore that...
on the fourth hand...wait when did I get four hands... I'm so confused.
on the fourth hand...wait when did I get four hands... I'm so confused.
- Location
- Kansas
I'm almost surprised that Po wasn't crying at the beautiful scene of master and student making peace with one another when the two first noticed him. I guess he was just to tired from facing down his nemesis, the stairs, to work up the emotional reaction.
Nashk
Tyrant of Kyushu
- Location
- Kyoshi Island
He couldn't cry, he used up all is moisture sweating by running up the stairs.
- Location
- Canada
Panda asthma...it's a very serious condition.
BlackLantern2814
Hello darkness my old friend.
- Location
- Earth
D'awwwww. So awesome!
Go, go, Slytherin!
Well then. This was unexpected.
Not sure why everyone keeps saying that. It was made rather clear early on that each of these parts from the second set of Fool's Canon are using much older versions of Paul. That it's somehow set in the future shouldn't really be any sort of surprise.
- Location
- Canada
It's more to do with the fact that older Paul seems to be aware that younger Paul is watching. There would be no reason to think/say what he did if he was just rememebering what happened with ambush bug.
again, several of us were expecting that Fools Canon OL would retain memories/knowledge of these future Paul snippets, just as he retained memories of the alt-Paul snippets.
- Pronouns
- she/her
He may not be able to notice babbypaul, but he presumably remembers seeing things the first time through? So he remembers his older, wiser self saying something amusingly fourth-wall-poking just before the flash-forwards ended, and says it again, for the first time.
The_Letter_K
Certified Character
- Location
- ...IJ_LM...
- Pronouns
- She/Her
Some Story Only errors for you, Mr. Zoat.
Should be 'an Alpha Lantern'.
Should be 'off that ridiculous'. Might also need a question mark, that rule always confuses me.
Either 'Megan finds', or 'Megan's finding it easy to fit in here. I'm not.'
The first quotation mark is backwards.
This one's tricky. Might be a Zoatism, might be Paul misspeaking, or might be either of the following; 'helping.. getting me..', 'helping get me..' ''
Should be hetErocentrism, I believe.
Broken link.
Some sort of weird formatting error, leaving the word 'swiftly' floating by itself in the paragraph that begins 'Ring, subspace it'.
This is correct, but distracting when read. It is supposed to be M'gann speaking, and that's how it's written, but the context makes it seem more likely it's Paul with the wrong colored quotes until a few paragraphs later, which is confusing. Not sure how to fix it.
Should be 'an Alpha Lantern'.
Should be 'off that ridiculous'. Might also need a question mark, that rule always confuses me.
Either 'Megan finds', or 'Megan's finding it easy to fit in here. I'm not.'
The first quotation mark is backwards.
This one's tricky. Might be a Zoatism, might be Paul misspeaking, or might be either of the following; 'helping.. getting me..', 'helping get me..' ''
Should be hetErocentrism, I believe.
Broken link.
Some sort of weird formatting error, leaving the word 'swiftly' floating by itself in the paragraph that begins 'Ring, subspace it'.
This is correct, but distracting when read. It is supposed to be M'gann speaking, and that's how it's written, but the context makes it seem more likely it's Paul with the wrong colored quotes until a few paragraphs later, which is confusing. Not sure how to fix it.
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- Location
- Hampden Park
Thank you, corrected.
No, that one's intentional.
- Location
- Pacific Northwest
I am the Bad Wolf. I create myself. I take the words... I scatter them. Across time and space. My message to lead myself here.
Empiricist2
Let's play doctor!
- Location
- Baton Rouge
Sounds much better.
I was going to wait till the episode was finished, but I'm bored today.
Typos:
And looks around
The previous segment he said he was going to keep the fact that he isn't actually from Apokolips a secret, then says he kept his birthday from Earth Prime. A mistake on his part?
With an Ace of Clubs
Doing some math, that works out to about 100 kilometers a second. Fast, but going by this it wouldn't do all that much, nowhere near the extinction level speeds mentioned previously. Maybe include a line about how it slowed down significantly between then and now?
Means that
Karsta Wor-Ul has one as well, in addition to the Genomorphs. It's mentioned later that he built one for his new Mountain as well, but I assume he's ignoring that one.
Mister Freeman's
Aliens' armour
Firing out a volley of missiles
Behavior, since American.
For an eleven
"Was it prehensile?"
I have is that the
Extraneous space between the end of the sentence and OL's quotation mark.
May want to make it more clear that Icon is talking about OL being the one from a different universe.
For all its surprising
Quotation mark in the middle of her talking shouldn't be there
This relationship meant a lot
Might want to make it more clear that the last sentence is talking about Po, although this isn't totally necessary
The answer's something,
Your head's in exactly
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Fool's Canon (part 6)
- Location
- Hampden Park
1st April
18:23 GMT -5
The orange beams reconnect to me the moment I reappear.
"Recharge complete." / "Recharge complete."
What.
Future me meets..? No. Deal with pirates and robots first, have existential breakdown later. Rings, what's going-?
Brilliant flashes of light from the other side of my bedroom door. Deal with that first. A destructive bolt annihilates the door as the rings show me the exterior. A series of mobile force field projectors have been set up at the end furthest away from the hangar. Behind them, pirates armed with coilguns are firing down the corridor towards the advancing robots, which return fire with beams of golden energy. Rob's standing next to the pirates, and with electricity crackling around his forearms he shoves one aside and blasts lightning into their mechanical foes. Not a bad choice, the coilguns aren't powerful enough to put the robots down permanently in anything less than overwhelming numbers but they can knock holes in their insulated armour.
"Orange Lantern to Cornwall, cease fire."
"Oran-? Right. Cease fire! Get down!"
Remarkably, the pirates promptly obey.
Ring, railgun, unmakers. Stewart ring, energy pulses. Both, construct armour.
Compliance. / Confirmed.
I step out into the corridor and a strange dislocation comes over me, déjà vu of a possibly literal kind. Orange beams blast for their centres of mass while the railgun tracks them xenomorph style, head shots to kill and leg shots to impair mobility. I could have done this from inside but I know my construct armour is tougher and has better battery life than the mobile force field generators and I should probably make an effort to preserve our apparent allies.
And a moment later, all the remaining robots are down. Eight lie on the floor, though I'm sure that there were more when we started. Can't feel any more in this section. Right. I turn back to the pirate line. "Cornwall, what's going on?"
A few pirates have their guns pointed at me, so as a show of good faith I drop my railgun construct as Rob manoeuvres around the barricades. "The pirates are on our side now and we're all fighting the robots."
A man in a red greatcoat follows him around the barricades, then strides past him towards me. "Captain Tyrone Fortune, at your service."
"Orange Lantern two eight one four."
He seems disquieted by my response. "Do none of the men of this era have rational names?"
"I gave you my rank and the length of my writ. I have to like you before I give you my name. What led you to work for Ambush Bug?"
"He appeared from thin air upon my ship, the Revenge. He said that he wished to commission us to attack a target and that he would pay us well for our efforts. Once I had his sworn word that the target was not an English possession, I accepted. Then this madness began."
"Witchcraft is what it is, Captain!"
His head snaps around, scowling. "That's enough, Mister Harrow. We have one slim chance to see our homes again and I'll not have your bellyaching ruin it!"
Rob looks at Captain Fortune for a moment, then returns his attention to me. "Ambush Bug's still around somewhere. He said something about this pushing our ratings up." He shakes his head. "That bloke's seriously messed up."
"The robots?"
"They can take a beating, but we can put them down. Then they-" He waves his right hand at the wrecks. "-disappear. I think he's fixing them up. The Bio-Ship took a few nasty hits, so Aqualad had Speedy take it back outside."
"The League?"
He shakes his head. "We lost contact after the Bio-Ship left and the zeta tubes aren't working. Icon's still here, but that's about it. If he could move a bit of the Caribbean to the Antarctic we could be anywhere." He glances at Captain Fortune. "Or anywhen."
I reach around to my back and pull the robo-bug off my armour. "Okay. I should be able to prevent him recovering his robots or teleporting. Ring, analyse, and update the jamming system we used on Johnny Sorrow."
"Update complete."
Rob looks sceptical. "And the rest?"
"I was given a plan for that from a version of me from the future."
"Blimey."
"I should be able to stop him, but he's going to have all of my attention. We'll need to attack the hangar."
"If he hasn't got infinite robots anymore, we can do it. Captain?"
Captain Fortune turns back to his men. "Look lively, you sorry swabbies! Get those barricades moving!"
A couple of pirates hand their guns off to their comrades and switch the shield generators to tower shield mode. They're really too heavy and awkward to be used like that in a fight, but they should at least be able to protect the people behind them from a few shots. I raise my left hand to my ear. "Orange Lantern to Aqualad. I've jammed the robots' recall ability and Cornwall and I will be assaulting the hangar."
"Good work. The rest of us will deal with the robots attacking us and then push towards the hangar. Wait for us before beginning your attack."
"Understood." I generate an orange barrier and lead the advance down the corridor. "Whereabouts you from, Captain?"
"Portsmouth. I was granted a letter of marque by his Majesty King Charles the Second." He looks me over. "Now look you, you're the second Englishman we've met here so I want a plain answer. Is this English territory?"
"Charles the Second? Late seventeenth century?"
"The year was sixteen seventy eight, though I take from your question that it no longer is."
"Hey!" Rob looks concerned. "We weren't telling them because we didn't want to change history or anything."
"Bit late for that. In answer to your question, Captain, this is not English territory. Britain conquered all French and Spanish territory in North America before losing most of it to a revolt by the colonials. We're presently in Rhode Island."
"I know of it. And the year?"
"Twenty Eleven. Elizabeth the Second rules Britain and the United States of America are our allies. I say 'our', for reasons which don't really bear going into I'm not actually a British citizen myself."
"Britain?"
Ring? Oh. "England and Scotland will be unified under King Charles the Second's niece, Queen Anne. The resulting state will be called Great Britain."
"Niece?" He frowns. "But Prince James is Catholic."
"And that's what seems odd to you about what I just said?"
"It has a beatitude of being unfamiliar in a familiar way. To be frank, the rest is a bit much."
"Fair enough. Charles had the sense to realise that his heirs being Catholic was a bit much for the country. He made sure his nieces were raised Anglican. I hope you'll be pleased to know that Christian on Christian religious wars are a thing of the past."
"I lived through Cromwell and the Restoration. I am well glad of it." He raises his coilgun as I destroy a patrolling robot. "I don't suppose that I could prevail upon you to permit us the continued use of these arquebuses once this affair is over, could I?"
"Not a chance."
18:23 GMT -5
The orange beams reconnect to me the moment I reappear.
"Recharge complete." / "Recharge complete."
What.
Future me meets..? No. Deal with pirates and robots first, have existential breakdown later. Rings, what's going-?
Brilliant flashes of light from the other side of my bedroom door. Deal with that first. A destructive bolt annihilates the door as the rings show me the exterior. A series of mobile force field projectors have been set up at the end furthest away from the hangar. Behind them, pirates armed with coilguns are firing down the corridor towards the advancing robots, which return fire with beams of golden energy. Rob's standing next to the pirates, and with electricity crackling around his forearms he shoves one aside and blasts lightning into their mechanical foes. Not a bad choice, the coilguns aren't powerful enough to put the robots down permanently in anything less than overwhelming numbers but they can knock holes in their insulated armour.
"Orange Lantern to Cornwall, cease fire."
"Oran-? Right. Cease fire! Get down!"
Remarkably, the pirates promptly obey.
Ring, railgun, unmakers. Stewart ring, energy pulses. Both, construct armour.
Compliance. / Confirmed.
I step out into the corridor and a strange dislocation comes over me, déjà vu of a possibly literal kind. Orange beams blast for their centres of mass while the railgun tracks them xenomorph style, head shots to kill and leg shots to impair mobility. I could have done this from inside but I know my construct armour is tougher and has better battery life than the mobile force field generators and I should probably make an effort to preserve our apparent allies.
And a moment later, all the remaining robots are down. Eight lie on the floor, though I'm sure that there were more when we started. Can't feel any more in this section. Right. I turn back to the pirate line. "Cornwall, what's going on?"
A few pirates have their guns pointed at me, so as a show of good faith I drop my railgun construct as Rob manoeuvres around the barricades. "The pirates are on our side now and we're all fighting the robots."
A man in a red greatcoat follows him around the barricades, then strides past him towards me. "Captain Tyrone Fortune, at your service."
"Orange Lantern two eight one four."
He seems disquieted by my response. "Do none of the men of this era have rational names?"
"I gave you my rank and the length of my writ. I have to like you before I give you my name. What led you to work for Ambush Bug?"
"He appeared from thin air upon my ship, the Revenge. He said that he wished to commission us to attack a target and that he would pay us well for our efforts. Once I had his sworn word that the target was not an English possession, I accepted. Then this madness began."
"Witchcraft is what it is, Captain!"
His head snaps around, scowling. "That's enough, Mister Harrow. We have one slim chance to see our homes again and I'll not have your bellyaching ruin it!"
Rob looks at Captain Fortune for a moment, then returns his attention to me. "Ambush Bug's still around somewhere. He said something about this pushing our ratings up." He shakes his head. "That bloke's seriously messed up."
"The robots?"
"They can take a beating, but we can put them down. Then they-" He waves his right hand at the wrecks. "-disappear. I think he's fixing them up. The Bio-Ship took a few nasty hits, so Aqualad had Speedy take it back outside."
"The League?"
He shakes his head. "We lost contact after the Bio-Ship left and the zeta tubes aren't working. Icon's still here, but that's about it. If he could move a bit of the Caribbean to the Antarctic we could be anywhere." He glances at Captain Fortune. "Or anywhen."
I reach around to my back and pull the robo-bug off my armour. "Okay. I should be able to prevent him recovering his robots or teleporting. Ring, analyse, and update the jamming system we used on Johnny Sorrow."
"Update complete."
Rob looks sceptical. "And the rest?"
"I was given a plan for that from a version of me from the future."
"Blimey."
"I should be able to stop him, but he's going to have all of my attention. We'll need to attack the hangar."
"If he hasn't got infinite robots anymore, we can do it. Captain?"
Captain Fortune turns back to his men. "Look lively, you sorry swabbies! Get those barricades moving!"
A couple of pirates hand their guns off to their comrades and switch the shield generators to tower shield mode. They're really too heavy and awkward to be used like that in a fight, but they should at least be able to protect the people behind them from a few shots. I raise my left hand to my ear. "Orange Lantern to Aqualad. I've jammed the robots' recall ability and Cornwall and I will be assaulting the hangar."
"Good work. The rest of us will deal with the robots attacking us and then push towards the hangar. Wait for us before beginning your attack."
"Understood." I generate an orange barrier and lead the advance down the corridor. "Whereabouts you from, Captain?"
"Portsmouth. I was granted a letter of marque by his Majesty King Charles the Second." He looks me over. "Now look you, you're the second Englishman we've met here so I want a plain answer. Is this English territory?"
"Charles the Second? Late seventeenth century?"
"The year was sixteen seventy eight, though I take from your question that it no longer is."
"Hey!" Rob looks concerned. "We weren't telling them because we didn't want to change history or anything."
"Bit late for that. In answer to your question, Captain, this is not English territory. Britain conquered all French and Spanish territory in North America before losing most of it to a revolt by the colonials. We're presently in Rhode Island."
"I know of it. And the year?"
"Twenty Eleven. Elizabeth the Second rules Britain and the United States of America are our allies. I say 'our', for reasons which don't really bear going into I'm not actually a British citizen myself."
"Britain?"
Ring? Oh. "England and Scotland will be unified under King Charles the Second's niece, Queen Anne. The resulting state will be called Great Britain."
"Niece?" He frowns. "But Prince James is Catholic."
"And that's what seems odd to you about what I just said?"
"It has a beatitude of being unfamiliar in a familiar way. To be frank, the rest is a bit much."
"Fair enough. Charles had the sense to realise that his heirs being Catholic was a bit much for the country. He made sure his nieces were raised Anglican. I hope you'll be pleased to know that Christian on Christian religious wars are a thing of the past."
"I lived through Cromwell and the Restoration. I am well glad of it." He raises his coilgun as I destroy a patrolling robot. "I don't suppose that I could prevail upon you to permit us the continued use of these arquebuses once this affair is over, could I?"
"Not a chance."
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- Status