A/N: No real warnings. Some crude humor, some fluff, some comic violence... oh yeah, and a hell of a tonal shift at the end.
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"Halloween…" I leaned against the bathroom counter, frowning at my reflection in the mirror.
It's a dress-up holiday, right? I vaguely remember something about the veil between the worlds of living and dead being thin and pretending to be monsters… or something. So I should put on a costume, right?
I sighed. I'd already put on my armor because, well, singularity, but. Should I…
There was a soft knock at the door. I stood, walked over, and opened it.
"Are you all right?" Medusa leaned against the door frame. "You've been in there a while."
I ducked my head with a blush. "Just… thinking. Not sure if this kind of thing has a dress code, or… I've never celebrated a holiday before."
She gave a soft hum. "I see. Well, I heard that Ritsuka and Mash were dressing up." She paused before smirking. "Cu Chulainn has also been wrangled into it. Asako and her group are staying behind, so Kadoc and Anastasia will be the other part of the party."
I raised my eyebrows. "So… the crew from Orleans?"
Medusa tilted her head. "Mostly. Joan, Jeanne, and Sieg will be going. Sasaki keeps to himself. In that case, Artoria managed to get Emiya out of the kitchen."
"And you?" I asked.
"Yes."
I thought about it and sighed. "Poor Musashi. Wonder what she'll do while we're gone?"
"Beat the tar out of Sasaki under Scathach's watchful gaze, most likely." Medusa took me by the hand and pulled me along. "So what do you intend to wear? I think the Masters and Servants are all dressing up."
I narrowed my eyes as I took in her outfit. She wore an elegant, sweeping purple dress a few shades darker than her hair, and a pair of ornate butterfly wings were affixed to her bare back. The dress bared her shoulders, and went with a pair of opera gloves of the same shade that went to her elbows. "You look really good. Who are you supposed to be?"
"Psyche, according to Da Vinci." Her lips quirked. "Somehow I don't think she had quite this form. Nor do I think you'd want to play the part of Eros."
"You probably look better than her," I muttered.
Medusa blushed faintly. "High praise. So? What about you?"
I tapped my chin. "Hm… I should look less human, right? That's a Halloween thing?"
She arched a perfectly sculpted eyebrow. "Now this I need to see."
My armor shifted. Gradually, it completely covered my skin below the neck, and softened into fabric. With a tap of my new shoe against the ground, I felt a dull grinding sensation as my bones shifted. My ears sank into my head and moved upward, and my tailbone stretched. Only once my ears re-emerged did I open my eyes.
Medusa's eyes were wide. "That was incredibly unsettling to watch," she said faintly.
I flexed my hands. My nails were gone, leaving small slits as hooked claws popped out and retreated. Small pads dotted each finger, and a large one spread across my palm. My ears were long, covered in fur the color of my hair, and pointed from the top of my head. My tail…
"Drat. I wanted one like Fou!" I scowled at the prehensile limb, covered in a coat of gold fur and reaching from my lower back to my heels. My canines dug into my lip, but weren't long enough to make me lisp.
At least I was sure I'd look good in my charcoal-grey suit. The coattails almost covered my actual tail, and the coat was buttoned over a white dress shirt, with a black bowtie instead of my usual choker. The diadem had turned into a set of silver studs affixed to my earlobes.
My ears twitched. "Well? How do I look?" I grinned.
Medusa gently placed her hand over her face. "Musashi is going to regret not coming."
...why does she sound like she's trying not to laugh? What did I do?
My, my! How adorable!
Huh?
It's fine! Don't worry about it! Oh, I should take a picture for Merlin…
SO YOU DO EXIST IN YOUR OWN BODY.
Sorry! Kch-ch! There's static kch-ch! You're breaking-
My ears flattened against my skull as I gave a sharp hiss. "
Morgan…"
Medusa giggled softly. "Alright, you. Come along." She gently took my hand and paused. "Oh." She prodded the pad on my palm with her fingertip. It felt odd, but not painful. "Right." She shook her head and pulled me along.
...why are people being so weird about it? I just wanted to dress up!
____________________________________________________________________________
Ritsuka was uncertain as to
why Da Vinci had enforced a 'dress-up rule' for everyone going on the mission, but at least it was easy to tell who was going and who wasn't.
For example: Medea and Kuzuki were staying at Chaldea, and were in their usual clothing.
Artoria wore a set of lion-themed footie pajamas with a cartoonish lion's head hood, and Emiya was dressed as what could only be called a P.T. Barnum knock-off - red overcoat, black shirt and pants, top hat, and a hula hoop that had to be a ring.
"Gao!"
And Artoria had apparently decided to get into character.
"Sooo…" Kadoc drawled, sauntering over. He wore a set of lederhosen with a feathered cap on his head. "I'm going to guess Da Vinci went for maximum irony with the costumes."
Anastasia frowned slightly. She wore a gauzy white gown with a deformed crown on her head. The crown was small at the base and bloomed into a tiered silver tower. Viy was still tucked in her arms. "Is this a reference?"
"Hm. If I had to guess, it would be Andersen's 'The Snow Queen'," Mash mused, tapping her chin. "You would be the titular character, making Kadoc… Kai?" She wore a lavender ballgown in a pattern Ritsuka
knew he recognized, but it wasn't in that color. She lifted her skirt, revealing translucent heels. "As for me…"
Ritsuka sighed, checking his shoulder pads in the blindingly white suit he'd been dressed in. "Of
course. Cinderella was one of Asako's favorites."
Said sibling crossed her arms, fuming. "You lucky… I want to go too…" Shotaro gently pat her shoulder and ushered her out of the chamber.
Ritsuka turned his attention to Mash. "Anyways, is the Snow Queen a favorite of yours?"
Mash shook her head. "I preferred 'The Little Mermaid'. That one was Matthew's favorite for some reason."
"Speaking of, where is he? He's not normally late," Kadoc noted.
"Medusa went to get him," Emiya said, tugging his bowtie with a look of mild consternation. "If they're taking this long, either he didn't have a costume, or…" he trailed off on a suggestive note.
"Gao!" Artoria pushed Emiya roughly with her felt-covered paw. "Don't be crass, Gao!"
"So we still need Sieg, Jeanne, Joan, Cu Chulainn, and Matthew. Medusa went to get one…" Kadoc rubbed the back of his head.
"Sorry we're late!" Sieg walked into the Rayshift chamber, a faint blush on his cheeks. He wore red suspenders, a yellow shirt, a blue bowtie, and large brown shoes. He also had a yellow hat with a blue band and red feather.
Jeanne was close behind in a flowing blue dress that glittered, and wore a pair of fairy wings on her back. Her hair was down, but held back by a blue headband.
"...Da Vinci went with some Disney stuff, huh," Kadoc muttered.
"Fairy tales. I don't think-" Mash began.
"Frozen. But that's not quite the same," Kadoc admitted.
"Apparently Medusa's supposed to be Psyche." Ritsuka frowned. "Do you think…?"
Cu Chulainn strode in with an exasperated look. He wore thonged sandals and a white robe - if Ritsuka recalled correctly, it was called a himation. On his back was a pair of white-feathered bird's wings, and his hair was down. "Let's get this over with."
A feeling of foreboding filled the room as Cu quickly moved from the entryway. Da Vinci's cackle resounded through the halls.
Slowly, Joan stalked in.
She wore a long, flowing black robe with purple flamelike accents, and on her head was a piece with two horns spiraling back from her forehead.
...of course Da Vinci would choose Maleficent.
Joan approached Ritsuka with murder in her eyes. "You'd
better appreciate me putting up with this," she growled.
"I do, believe me." Ritsuka sighed. "We're all suffering, at least a little."
Joan crossed her arms and turned to the side, slightly mollified.
Medusa swept in, looking as radiant as the first time Ritsuka had seen her in costume. Behind her-
Oh. Oh
no.
Emiya's eyebrows rose slightly. "...those are real cat ears."
"Is that a
tail?" Mash looked distraught. "Matthew, what did you
do?" she whispered.
Musashi darted in after them, grabbing Matthew's hand. "YOU HAVE TOE BEANS!?" she howled as she started rubbing his fingertips.
Ritsuka cast a longing look at the Rayshift coffin, passively noting Cu Chulainn making a beeline towards Matthew with a look he had no desire to decipher.
"Well, that's Cu looking like he wants to plow your brother like the fields of Ireland," Kadoc mused.
Mash let out a muffled gasp. "
Kadoc!"
"Though given by how Matthew's the one picking
him up, it's anyone's gue-" he continued blithely.
And that. That was it. Ritsuka had enough. "Alright, I'm heading out." He quickly moved toward the coffin, opened the lid manually, got in, and closed it after him with a two-fingered salute.
"
Senpai, wait for me!" Mash rushed over to the coffin, stopping it from closing all the way with her prodigious strength. With minimal effort she forced it just enough that she could cram herself in before closing it firmly behind her.
As the Rayshift countdown began, Ritsuka and Mash slowly relaxed. But then, a look of worry crossed Mash's face.
"What's wrong?" Ritsuka didn't
think there would be adverse effects from her being in the coffin…
"I just realized- where's Fou?" Her visible eye was wide.
Ritsuka slowly closed his eyes. "I'm sure he'll turn up when it'll cause the most chaos."
"...I'm afraid you're right." Mash sighed, and Ritsuka was forced to acknowledge that he was in relatively cramped quarters with someone who he was… possibly attracted to. Maybe. A little.
...a lot.
Please Rayshift Crew, hurry up!
____________________________________________________________________________
Fou pawed at the small black cloak affixed to his collar, ears twitching around the witch's hat atop his head. "Fou."
"Alright! Time to go!" Charlemagne planted his fists on his hips, beaming widely. His butler's uniform was flawless, and included a monocle over his left eye.
"Why… are we wearing these…" Bradamante slumped, forcing the skirt of her maid uniform down to cover her knees.
Astolfo sighed. "And once again. The dress." He tugged on the rabbit ears atop his head, smoothing his other hand across the gold filigree of his skirt. "Ah, well. Englishmen make do, huh?"
Bradamante closed her eyes as though in prayer.
The space around them warped, pulling them along with Fou from the room they hid in.
____________________________________________________________________________
Roman let out a long sigh.
"I'm sure they'll have fun. They're overdue for a break," Da Vinci reassured him.
"Yes, yes. I don't disagree." He dropped his head on his desk. "But where's
my break?" he whined.
"Well, you made immense headway in all the paperwork, and most of the staff are taking the day off." Da Vinci leaned against his desk. "It should be okay to enjoy a little down time."
Roman threw himself back in his chair. "And do what!? I don't even have Magi Mari to heal my soul any mo-ho-ho-rrrre!" he sobbed. "My precious idol is goooooone!"
"You mean Merlin?" Da Vinci asked sweetly.
"VILE TRICKSTER!" Roman slammed his forehead into his desk.
A soft ping came from his computer.
Slowly, Roman sat up.
Da Vinci leaned over his shoulder. "Huh… 'hot Russian single in your area'?" Her eyebrows raised. "I guess even the end of the world isn't enough to stop those bots."
Roman narrowed his eyes. "It's… a 'streamer'?"
"Hm? Oh. They usually play video games while giving commentary and people watch, though there are streams for drawing, music, and tabletop games." Da Vinci blinked. "What's the name?"
"...BYNastyGranny." Roman's eyebrows pinched. "I… no. No thank you." He went to close the window.
It did not close.
"WHAT WHAT FROM THE CHICKEN HUT, IT'S YOUR FAVORITE GRANNY!" a rasping voice yelled.
Roman went pale.
"WE BRING YOU THIS SPECIAL STREAM FOR HALLOWEEN! NOW, I WAS GOING TO STREAM SOME GOOD OLD AMNESIA: A MACHINE FOR PIGS, BUT WE HAVE SOMETHING EQUALLY FUN TO SEE! LET'S WATCH THE ADVENTURE OF CHALDEA'S MASTERS AND THEIR SERVANTS IN CASTLE CACHTICE! NOW WITH ADDED CATBOY SHENANIGANS!"
"...is she
there?" Da Vinci asked after a moment of listening to the raucous cackling.
"SADLY I COULDN'T MAKE IT IN PERSON! SEPTEM'S KIND OF FROSTY RIGHT NOW, WHICH IS JUST MY WEATHER! BEST FOR ME TO HOLD DOWN THE FORT-" The video kept rolling as the streamer muttered amongst the sound of shuffling paper. "HERE IN 60 AD!"
"..." Roman and Da Vinci stared at each other.
"Morgan?" Roman whispered.
"Probably," Da Vinci agreed.
"DEFINITELY!"
____________________________________________________________________________
The shadows filtered, giving way to the silhouette of a massive castle. It was clearly European, or so I guessed. To me it was just big. Big drawbridge, big torches flanking the gate. Big.
Over the entryway was a sign: 'One Night Only! Idol Duet at Castle Cachtice!'
"Right. Ready, everyone?" Ritsuka clenched his fist, eyes burning with purpose.
"For… a party?" I tilted my head.
Kadoc smirked. "It's a mission, Matthew." For a minute, he held the expression before cracking up. "Shit, I can't take you seriously like that."
My ears flattened against my skull. "Should I try something else…?" I dropped my shoulders and slumped.
"You look fine," Cu said firmly, putting an arm around my neck.
"GAO!"
We looked behind us to see Artoria pointing at an approaching group of three. Plus Fou.
Charlie in a butler uniform, Bradamante as a maid, and…
"Astolfo. What are you wearing?" I felt my tail twitch.
"I get to be the bunnygirl." He spun his finger in the air in faux-enthusiasm. "Woo-hoo." His eyes narrowed. "A catboy?
Really?"
I bared my teeth, only for Anastasia to grab my hand.
"
Bozhe moi, she was right. You
do have toe beans," she muttered in shock, eyes wide.
"What!?" Bradamante rushed forward and grabbed my other hand. "That- what!?"
"Cu Chulainn, helllp!" I whined.
"...now I'm kind of curious," Kadoc muttered, leaning over Anastasia's shoulder. "Huh.
And your fingernails got replaced with retractable claws." He paused. "That's kind of creepy."
Joan cleared her throat. "Guys. Castle?"
Ritsuka drove his heel into the ground. "All right! First off: how did you three come along? We have a full set of Servants!"
My head bowed under a sudden weight. "Fou!"
Ritsuka stared at him for a long moment.
"Fou can Rayshift on his own?" Mash's eye was wide.
"Fou, fou!" His tail lashed against my ears.
"Hup!" I was lifted out of the grip of Bradamante and Anastasia, and dropped between Cu and Medusa. "Better?" Cu grinned, earrings gleaming in the low light.
"Much." I hid behind him, minding the wings attached to his outfit.
"...Sieg and Jeanne went in already," Joan said with a jab of her thumb.
Ritsuka let out a rattling sigh. "Let's go, gang."
Emiya hummed thoughtfully as the mob wandered in. "I wonder who we'll see?"
"Elizabeth is definitely here; it's her castle," Kadoc noted. "Probably folks from Orleans."
Charlie looked around as the torches lit ahead of us, illuminating our path. "Oooh. Great effects!"
"Thank you!"
The thirteen of us stopped in a large room with a sweeping staircase to a second floor. The ground before us opened, and a loud grinding echoed.
Slowly, a platform twisted out of the ground, raising a figure in shadow until a spotlight clicked on overhead.
"Ohohoho! Welcome to Castle Cachtice!" Liz planted her hands on her hips, tail waving behind her. "We've prepared a night of music and merriment, so please make yourself at home!"
"Hello everyone!" Marie leapt from the shadows and landed next to Liz. "It's so wonderful to see you again!"
A door at the base of the platform creaked open. d'Eon's head poked out. "
Bonjour!" They smiled politely.
Slowly, Mozart peeked out over their head. "Now I feel underdressed," he complained. "Also, did we
have to pedal this thing up?"
"Stop complaining," a white-haired man scolded as he leaned over Mozart. He looked out at us for a moment before looking away in embarrassment. "My apologies. I was… not myself when last we met."
"Sanson?" Bradamante stepped forward. "It's good to see you hale and whole." She smiled.
The white-haired man ducked his head. "Thank you, Lady Knight. I owe you and your friends for freeing me."
"Yo!" Joan walked ahead next to Bradamante. "Glad to see you guys are in one piece. Where'd Jeanne and dragon-boy run off to?"
Marie giggled. "Looks like your attitude improved," she teased. She hummed. "Last I saw, they were headed towards the stage…"
"Which you aren't allowed to see yet! We have tons of snacks to eat before the show!" Liz crossed her arms.
"And, ah… we hoped you might be able to help with a slight detail or two…" Marie tapped her fingertips together with a slightly nervous air.
Liz bristled. "I said it's fine!"
"How can we help?" Ritsuka asked, taking the lead with Kadoc at his back.
"We have an unwelcome guest," Mozart drawled. "Not to mention we have some… performance issues."
"THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH MY SINGING!" Liz yelled, standing on tiptoes and scrunching her eyes shut.
"Not to the deaf," Mozart sniped. "Ow!"
d'Eon lowered their fist from where they'd swat his nose. "As… indelicate as my companion is, he raises a clear issue. As it's Lady Bathory's show, she should sing - but whenever she does, it unleashes a wall of sound. It's impossible to discern the quality, when… well…"
"When one is forced to guard their eardrums," Sanson finished with a sigh.
Liz was scarlet in mortification, eyes watering fiercely.
I looked at Mash, and she smiled a little, then nodded. Then I stepped forward. "Well, if I can help regulate the volume output so your voice can be heard, I'll do it."
Elizabeth blinked. "Huh?"
Ritsuka smiled. "Sounds good! You work with Liz to help bring her voice under her control, and the rest of us will search the castle for the intruder."
Cu draped an arm over my shoulders. "We'll keep them company. Right, Medusa?"
She nodded. "As you wish."
"I'm gonna go find Sieg and Jeanne! Brada, Boss - let's roll!" Astolfo darted away.
"ASTOLFO!" Bradamante gave a quick curtsy before smoothing her skirt. "Apologies! ASTOLFO!" She ran after him.
Charlie bowed. "Thanks for the invite! We'll be sure to make it for the show!" Then he dashed off in pursuit of his paladins.
"Oh, did I forget to mention? We need musicians." Mozart smiled beatifically. "I have no desire to dabble in 'pop music', so you're on your own!"
Ritsuka shook his head. "Mash, Joan, with me. Kadoc, you take… uh…"
Anastasia and Kadoc had already left.
"We'll find them, Ritsuka." Emiya gave a slight bow. "Artoria? Shall we?"
She held her paws up. "Gao! Onward, Shirou!"
He chuckled as he hoisted the ring over his shoulder, and the two of them wandered away.
"Oh, we forgot to mention: Siegfried and Vlad are about." Mozart slowly drew back into the platform with a shit-eating grin. "Have fun storming the castle! OW!"
d'Eon and Sanson slammed the door shut, and the platform began to shudder with the echoes of violence.
Liz drooped. "Everything's already gone sideways…" she moaned.
Marie gently pat her back. "There, there. We'll find a way, Liz."
I planted my hands on my hips. "If nothing else, I can accompany you with my illusions!"
"NO! REAL MUSIC ONLY!"
I winced. "Uh…"
Ritsuka tilted his head. "I played some guitar in the past," he admitted after a moment.
"That just leaves bass, drums, and a keyboard," Marie counted off on her fingers. She leapt down. "Any volunteers?"
"Um…" Mash fiddled with her hands. "I can try the bass? Doctor Roman tried to expose me to various artistic pursuits, so…"
I rubbed my hands together. "Kadoc can do drums pretty well, and I bet Anastasia can play piano - that's close enough to a keyboard?"
Liz leapt to join Marie. "Thank goodness! When that jerk composer said he wasn't going to play, I thought I was gonna cry!" She pouted, eyes glistening.
Ritsuka coughed. "So-" He was cut off by Mash and Joan each grabbing an arm.
"Let's go find that intruder, Senpai! Oh, and we should tell Kadoc and the rest that there's two people who aren't…" Mash's voice trailed off as they frog-marched Ritsuka down a hallway.
"You got all that, Archaman?" I asked aloud.
Liz jumped back as his voice echoed through the air. "I do, and I'm transmitting the information now. Best not to borrow trouble." His tone was distant, almost in shock. "I… tell me, do you know any 'streamers'?"
"Yeah?" I blinked.
"What about a… 'BYNastyGranny'?" I started to get a sense of urgency from him.
"Eh. She's a griefer, really likes playing Soulsborne games. I got summoned in to deal with her while I played DS Three sometimes. We went back and forth kicking each other's butt, but she's alright I guess." I shrugged. "That all?"
"Yep. Just gonna. Uh." The connection cut.
"...huh." Cu crossed his arms as he leaned against me. "That was definitely weird."
Medusa placed a hand on my shoulder. "Does this 'streamer' have any other identifying traits? It's odd Roman would ask about one in particular."
"Well, she starts her streams by screaming 'what what from the chicken hut' and is really, really old. Like does not sound like a normal streamer at all, old. Normally I see folks in their teens, twenties, thirties, and sometimes forties. Senior citizens are rare."
Liz mouthed 'chicken hut?' with a pinched expression.
I held my palms out helplessly. "It's her schtick. Anyways." I dropped my hands. "Let's find somewhere to sit down so I can examine what's going on with your vocal cords."
Marie shook her head as Liz crossed her arms and began to fume.
"...this might take a while," Cu muttered.
Medusa… huh.
Wonder why she looks so spooked?
____________________________________________________________________________
"BEHOLD THE FACE OF A MAN WHO SLEPT THROUGH EVERY HISTORY CLASS HIS MOTHER DIDN'T WAKE HIM UP FOR! AND THE FACE OF A WOMAN WHO KNOWS EXACTLY WHAT HE'S MISSING!"
Da Vinci gently pat Roman on the head as he lay facedown on his desk.
____________________________________________________________________________
Sieg wandered forth, his hand in Jeanne's.
"So what are we looking for?" Jeanne frowned curiously.
"I felt- or thought I felt- someone familiar." Sieg squinted as they turned a corner. "We're getting close. So where…?"
He yelped as he was lifted by the back of his collar, his costume straining. "Sorry, but you can't go that way."
Jeanne turned on her heel. "Siegfried!" Her frown turned to a brilliant smile.
"Ah." The knight smiled gently as he gingerly tossed Sieg into the air, then caught him under his arm. "It's good to see the both of you."
Sieg squirmed before giving up with a laugh.
"You both look well." Siegfried set Sieg down. "So how is life at Chaldea?"
"It's good. I've made new friends, and had Jeanne and Astolfo around." Sieg smiled brightly.
"Having Joan around is… refreshing. She's like a rambunctious little sister. And some people like Medea and Emiya are interesting too." Jeanne folded her hands in front of her. "How about you?"
Siegfried shrugged. "I appeared here along with everyone else. I think the only ones who didn't come were Atalanta, Lancelot, Prelati, and La Voisin."
Jeanne hummed. "So you and…?"
"Lancer of Black is also here, in his rational form." Siegfried inclined his head. "He has been in reasonably good spirits, given the circumstances."
Sieg and Jeanne exchanged a look. "Circumstances?" Sieg asked.
"The Phantom of the Opera has been spotted in the castle. He is primarily a threat to the likes of Mozart, but the rest of the Servants here can repel him with no major effort." Siegfried paused. "He also seems uninterested in combat, and is looking for something."
"Huh. Well, maybe he won't interfere with the party." Sieg shrugged. "Oh, yeah! Somehow-"
"SIEGFRIED!" A pink-haired ballistic slammed into the knight, sending the two tumbling head over feet.
"Astolfo made it here too," Sieg finished lamely.
"Preserve me from my idiot cousin," Bradamante groaned as she hobbled forward. "These aren't my magic heels! How am I supposed to keep up in them?"
"Hey guys! Oh, Siegfried!" Charlie came to a halt with a wide smile. "Talk about reunions, huh?"
Jeanne giggled as Sieg nodded with a sheepish look.
Siegfried sat up with a bemused look as Astolfo dangled from his shoulders with a cheerful grin.
Bradamante sighed. "I hope the others haven't run into trouble…"
____________________________________________________________________________
Emiya rubbed his forehead. "Moderation, Artoria. We want to save some for our Masters, not to mention everyone else."
Artoria blinked at him as she held her fourth plate of pastries. "There's still plenty left," she replied with a blank look.
Emiya looked at the lavishly prepared table, which already had a noticeable dent in the quantity of food. "For now."
"Are you… my Angel…?"
Emiya narrowed his eyes as he leaned around Artoria to look at the looming shadow. "And who are you?"
Artoria turned to glare at the person in question. "Gao." A translucent haze of wind sprouted from her paw, causing the jack-o-lanterns that acted as decoration in the room to gutter with the flickering flame within.
The shadow immediately vanished, melting into the wall.
"Well, that answered his question," Emiya mused.
Artoria busied herself with biting into a cream puff.
"Good grief." Emiya plucked four plates from the stack and began bustling around them, stacking them with all manners of dessert. "Best prepare some for those of us who require food." He tapped the groping paw with the large ring that came with his costume. "No."
Artoria pouted as she chewed. "Gao."
____________________________________________________________________________
Kadoc sighed as he leaned against the wall. "So much for finding the buffet."
"I'm pretty sure we missed that turn three halls back," Anastasia noted.
"You did."
"See? We did." Anastasia adjusted her dress with a prim look before going still.
Both of them looked up.
"Good evening, guests of Elizabeth Bathory." The gentleman with shoulder-length white-blond hair loomed over them. He had a neat goatee, his eyes were circled with dark shadows, and he wore elegant clothes of black and dark blue.
"A ghost?" Kadoc said faintly.
"Hm. Close, depending on one's definition of what a Servant is." The man inclined his head slightly. "I am Vlad III, Lancer-class Servant."
"Not a vampire, then." Kadoc relaxed minutely.
"No. Not…
that." Vlad's eye twitched. "I appreciate your capability of making the distinction. I've been inches from impaling that upstart composer for some time."
Anastasia nodded slightly. "I see." Then, after a moment: "Would you mind showing us to the dining hall?"
Vlad raised his eyebrows as his eyelids lowered. "Truly?"
Kadoc rubbed the back of his neck. "We'd appreciate it?"
Slowly, he crossed his arms. "Turn around. You're not far." Despite the cool, authoritarian air he held, Kadoc detected the slightest hint of amusement in Vlad's bearing.
The three walked down the hallway, turning where indicated by Vlad's directions. Before long, they found the dining hall - covered in orange and black streamers with jack-o-lanterns providing light.
"Ah, you made it." Emiya inclined his head. "I prepared plates for Kadoc, Ritsuka, Mash, and Matthew."
Artoria gnawed on what appeared to be a huge turkey leg, teeth tearing into the meat.
"I'll fix one for you right away, Anastasia." Emiya inclined his head, fully in homemaker mode.
Vlad raised an eyebrow elegantly. "And who might you be? I recall the King of Knights, however faintly."
Emiya opened his mouth-
"There you guys are!" Ritsuka stormed in, Mash and Joan in tow. He paused to incline his head towards Vlad. "Vlad III, I assume." He turned on Kadoc, eyes blazing. "Where are Sieg and Jeanne!? And did you know there's a Servant at large?"
Kadoc gave a meaningful look at Vlad.
"A
hostile Servant," Ritsuka stressed.
"Are you my Angel…?" a voice whispered. The figure of the Phantom loomed over Anastasia.
"GAO!"
The turkey leg flew, striking him in the diaphragm and causing him to choke.
Mash held her hand out. "Orders, Master!"
"Subdue if possible!" Ritsuka barked.
Kadoc glanced at Anastasia. "Ana?"
She smiled slightly. "I'll run backup if needed."
Mash's shield appeared in her hand, and she quickly spun its handle and caught the Phantom with a jab to his middle, the upper flange catching his ribs. As he reeled, she quickly spun the shield on its axis, flung it forward until she caught the lower flange, flipped it so the face was aimed downward, and lifted it over her head.
With a mighty roar, she brought the face of the shield down upon the Phantom's head in a thunderous crash, sending him crumpling to the ground.
The only sound to be heard was Artoria gnawing on a fresh turkey leg as the gathered Servants and humans gazed in awe as Mash-Cinderella dispersed her shield.
"Huh." Joan gave a slow blink. "Where'd you learn
that?"
Mash flushed delicately. "Well, I just put some of the training from Lady Scathach to use…"
Kadoc jerked as Anastasia shouldered him, nodding at Ritsuka.
The younger man tugged his collar, visibly blushing.
____________________________________________________________________________
Roman blinked a few times as a small superscript appeared in the corner of the screen.
'Competency Kink Count: 1'
Da Vinci giggled as he slumped despondently.
____________________________________________________________________________
I settled into the large, plushy chair in the lounge, seated across from Marie and Liz. "So. Tell me about what happens when you sing."
Elizabeth stuck her nose up. "
Plebeians are simply unable to appreciate the nuances of my performance. True fans adore it!"
Marie shook her head. "Her voice reaches a pitch and volume that can't be handled by mortal ears. It's impossible to discern the quality of the singing because it's obscured by the sonic attack."
"Hm. Can it be controlled?" Medusa asked, seated on one arm of the chair.
"Th-that- well, I-" Liz gazed downward, cheeks red in embarrassment.
"Thaaat's a no," Cu drawled, draping himself over the chair's back.
I closed my eyes. "Elizabeth. Where do your horns and tail come from? The tail's too thick to be a devil's tail, at least in most Western traditions."
"Well, it's said that the Bathory family has dragon blood," she began.
"Solved it. You have a breath weapon you can't control, and it gets in the way of your singing." I rubbed my hands together as I opened my eyes. "Fortunately, you've come to the right place."
Elizabeth looked torn between confusion, anger at being interrupted, and hope. "Eh?"
"I mean, I made contacts that function as high-grade Mystic Eye Killers for Medusa, here." I tilted my head at her, only for her hand to cup one of my ears and scratch at the base-
Oh. Oooh.
That feels nice.
"Are you
purring?" Cu asked in a delighted tone.
"Mrrr…" I narrowed my eyes.
"Ahem!" Liz leaned forward. "You were
saying?"
"So you can make something that can help her control the draconic parts of her voice?" Marie asked hopefully.
"Yep." I made grabby hands. "Now fork over that choker so I can get started."
"E-eh!?" Elizabeth recoiled, placing her hands over it.
"I need a medium to work with, and one that'll be close to what's affected. Choker on the throat, which has the vocal cords."
Liz hesitated for a moment, then reached behind her neck and undid some sort of clasp. Then she handed me the strip of lace-bordered fabric.
I looked at it critically for a moment. "Eh, sure."
"Huh!?" Elizabeth gawked.
"Hm, hm… 'voice', 'modulate', 'air' - that one's important - 'dragon', aaand…" I pursed my lips as my finger slowed in its tracing across the cloth. "Yeah, let's go with 'breath'. A bit of superscript for context, aaaand…" I clicked my fingers, and the light faded from the cloth.
"That's it?" Cu asked, surprised.
"I mean, it's already her 'armor', so it's a magic item in and of itself. Adding to a base is way simpler than making something whole-cloth," I explained as I handed the choker back.
Medusa tilted her head. "So what did it take to make my contacts?"
"Runes, purified water, and a sediment of ground adder scales, diamond dust, and powdered lapis lazuli," I rattled off in a bored tone. "A bit of polish for prep, then some etching by hand. Archaman gave me the contacts in the first place."
"...you say it like it's nothing." Medusa was quiet.
I shrugged. "What, like it's hard? I could do it, so I did. If I can do it, I will. There's no reason or worry behind it."
A soft, sweet sound filled the air.
Cu buried his face in my hair as Liz carried note after note, a look of awe spreading across her face.
Marie folded her hands over her mouth, covering her smile.
Medusa surreptitiously took my hand in hers, gently squeezing it. I glanced at her, and she smiled back, a tender look in her eyes. I offered a smile of my own, grasping Cu's arms as they looped around my neck with my free hand.
____________________________________________________________________________
'Competency Kink Count: 3'
"That doesn't count! That's just a heartwarming moment!" Roman snapped accusingly.
"EXCUSE ME? WHO'S THE MC AROUND HERE!?"
Roman grit his teeth. "At this rate, I'd take that
wizard playing at being an idol," he hissed.
"GREAT IDEA! TIME FOR A GUEST!"
Roman started to sweat.
"Helloooo everybody!" a falsetto rang out. "Right from Avalon, it's everyone's favorite idol- Magi Mari!"
Da Vinci gently pat Roman's head as he gradually broke down into shambles of a man.
The 'idol' twirled and danced in the corner of the screen as vicious cackles nearly drowned out Elizabeth's vocal experimentation.
"I HAVEN'T HAD THIS MUCH FUN SINCE I CAMPED IN THE FOREST OF GIANTS FOR INVASIONS AFTER THE PS4 RERELEASE!"
____________________________________________________________________________
"So wait. All you wanted was to see the show?"
The Phantom-
Erik, no! I swear, I didn't lead-
Erik nodded morosely.
I gently pat his head, imparting a simple healing rune to deflate the lump atop his skull.
"This is Halloween, this is Halloween, pumpkins scream in the dead of night~"
The concert went on, and… it was better than it had any right to be. As suggested, Kadoc handled the drums, Anastasia's fingers flew across keys to coax out sound, and Ritsuka and Mash managed the guitar and bass. Marie and Liz belted out a duet, covering the multitude of parts to the song.
Artoria dangled from a turkey leg by her teeth, somehow, held by the bone by Emiya. He wore a look of severe disappointment and mild amusement on his face.
A twinkle in her eye kept me from saying anything, given she was enjoying herself so much.
"Say it once, say it twice! Take a chance and roll the dice, ride with the moon in the dead of night~"
Medusa and Cu swayed together not far from me, Cu snickering at the lyrics as Medusa simply smiled and shook her head.
Siegfried leaned against the wall next to Vlad, both watching as Astolfo dragged Sieg, Jeanne, Joan, and Bradmante into a wild circle dance. Charlie clapped merrily as he laughed raucously.
"In this town we call home, everyone hail to the pumpkin song!"
Mozart sat, nursing a cup of wine with noise-cancelling headphones over his ears. d'Eon swayed and hummed to the music, and Sanson frowned in slight confusion.
"Enjoying yourself, Erik?" I asked with a grin.
The man blinked, before looking to the stage. "It isn't… bad. But neither of them are my Christine." He looked downward.
"Is it Christine you're looking for, or happiness?" I mused aloud.
"Aren't they the same?" he asked.
I shrugged. "Are they?"
Erik nodded, then paused. He seemed to think. "Yes. Music is my joy, and Christine…" He trailed off.
"Thank you everyone! Now, before we finish our show, we have one last number!"
...why is Kadoc smirking?
"Kiesaru keshiki - saisho no sora… Akaku saite shiroku kieru, sono azakaya na hate…" Liz sang in an airy tone.
Goddamn it. Yes, I'm a huge nerd and-
Cu pulled me away from Erik, nodding his head at him. "Hope you don't mind."
Erik tilted his head, then turned back to the stage as the performance continued.
"Utsushiyo saita higanbana wa, saigo ni moete shizuka ni negai utau, kano sora e to wataru tabiji wo iroderu neiro, tooku ni miru keshiki…"
I ducked my head as Cu put my hands on Medusa's shoulders, only for Medusa to put one hand on Cu's shoulder and hold his free hand. His other hand went to her waist, leaving me locked between them as we moved to the music.
"Yurayurara fune wa susumu, yurayurayurara doko e iku, kazoekirenai omoide wo nose tooku e…"
I ducked my head, my ears and tail twitching in embarrassment and happiness as they pressed in and held me close.
Definitely getting rid of these when I get-
"Sekai wo utsusu shikai no naka, majiwaru amata shisen to monogatari, tsui ni midaresaita sono kioku mune ni daki, kishibe ni tadoritsuku-"
Medusa tilted my head up, taking her hand off of Cu to do so. Gently, she brushed her lips with mine.
"Eh?" My eyes widened.
"Because I could." She smiled and kissed me again.
"...sayonara."
Cu chuckled as he leaned down and pressed his lips to my cheek.
"Thank you for coming, everyone!" Liz shouted.
I turned my head up to the stage along with the others.
She held up a Grail, smaller than the ones we'd recovered from Fuyuki, Orleans, or the sub-singularity. "And now I have one more gift!"
____________________________________________________________________________
"WHAT'S THIS? WHAT'S THIS?"
Roman sat up, groaning. "What now?" he whimpered.
"LOOKS LIKE WE HAVE A BIG WINNER! CHALDEA'S DUE FOR A HUGE INFLUX OF MANPOWER IN THREE, TWO-"
"Wait, what-?" Roman's eyes shot open as Da Vinci started giggling helplessly.
____________________________________________________________________________
"For my last wish on this Holy Grail! Let's all work together to save the world!"
The scenery warped. Stone jittered and flaked into crimson light.
Mozart tossed his headphones onto the ground. "Finally!" he snapped dramatically. "WE! ARE! OUT OF HERE!"
Sanson jabbed him in the kidney with his elbow, winding him.
In moments, the world righted itself, space contracted-
And we all stood in the Summoning Chamber.
"Eh?" Ritsuka stared, frozen with the guitar in his hands. It too vanished in a puff of red glitter.
"Happy Halloween!" Marie cheered. "So what rooms do we get?"
Kadoc collapsed onto the floor, the drumset and seat vanishing as he laughed himself sick.
Artoria opened her jaws, falling to her feet. Immediately she was composed once more. "Welcome to Chaldea. In the absence of our Masters, permit me to guide you around the premises." She said this with all the gravitas permitted by wearing lion pajamas.
Erik looked around, bewildered. Then he shrugged.
The door slammed open.
"HI EVERYBODY!" Asako stood there in a rotund jack-o-lantern costume with a green cap, Fou standing on her head with a bucket of candy in his mouth. "WHO'S READY FOR TRICK OR TREAT!?"
Shotaro waved from behind her sheepishly. Touko stood next to him, looking for all the world like she'd kill for a cigarette.
I looked up at Cu and Medusa.
"Having fun?" Cu asked teasingly.
"Actually, yes," I admitted.
His smile softened. "Good."
And that was when Gilgamesh appeared wearing a smug smile, golden body paint,
hopefully a thong, and not much else.
"AUO CAST-OFF!" Liz shrieked, leaping behind Ritsuka in abject terror.
I cracked my knuckles, ears twitching. "Fun's over."
Cu let out a bellowing laugh as I reverted to my normal armor, my ears, hands, and body returning to normal.
Gilgamesh scowled. "You dare revert before I've had my fun?"
"
I'm gonna throw something at you," I growled.
A net flew through the air, covering Gilgamesh's (hopefully) mostly bare body. He stood, frozen in shock.
"All apologies!" Shotaro said cheerfully, hobbling into the room. "I'll take it from here."
"Mongrel! You will-!" Gilgamesh snarled.
Crimson flames began to waft from Shotaro's mouth as his eyes turned from brown to blood-red. "
Nude unarmed ape says what?"
Gilgamesh continued to roar in indignation as Shotaro effortlessly dragged him away, giving Asako a wide berth.
As though a spell had ended, Ritsuka shook himself. "And welcome to Chaldea, everyone!" he said with a nervous smile.
Astolfo looked around the room, distinctly unimpressed. "Young Frankenstein, anyone?"
"I've got popcorn!" Musashi yelled from the hall.
Liz slowly poked her head out from behind Ritsuka, still shaking.
"You get used to it," Mash offered with a tired (dead inside) smile.
____________________________________________________________________________
"YOU'RE WELCOME! AND THAT ENDS TONIGHT'S STREAM!"
Roman exhaled. "Thank God."
"Almost."
Roman's eyebrow twitched. "Oh now what-"
The screen flickered, changing to a camera view.
____________________________________________________________________________
The white wolves leapt at the fleeing refugees, bounding through the snow.
A sweeping blade wreathed in flame knocked several back, a red-clad blonde with green eyes wielding it with a look of desperation. "Quickly! Get to the golden city! You'll be safe there!" With deft bladework, she deflected several more lunges, only for teeth to close in on her open back-
A pair of fists drove the wolf to the ground with a mad roar, crimson eyes burning through the haze of snow.
"Uncle!" the woman cried in relief.
Sparks floated around, igniting the wolves and melting their bodies. A woman in white robes with long, wavy hair and tanned skin ran up. "My beloved and I rescued all we could," she said with a narrowed gaze against the flitting snowflakes.
A man in red cloth covered by a red toga followed behind her, blade in his hand. His build was tall and regal. "Nero, we must fall back. She's leading the warriors of Gaul, and we can't protect the people
and face them
and his familiars."
Nero looked up at the approaching woman. Her hair was red and flowing, and she wore a long cloak trimmed with rabbit fur. Her expression was stoic, but the flames of hatred flickered in her gaze.
"Cleopatra! Julius! Uncle! We must fall back! Protect the people!" she cried out. The four dashed away, Cleopatra leaving a wall of flame behind them.
The queen opened her cloak, and observed the hare's path as it dashed away. "...too close to the perimeter. We hold." Her eyes tracked the vile Romans and their collaborator. Her hate boiled, higher and hotter.
Soon. Soon, she'd have revenge. For her, for her people, for her children.
____________________________________________________________________________
The gates of the golden city were marked with ofuda that lit as the refugees entered.
"Come in, come in, mikon," the woman in blue urged. Her kimono bared her shoulders, and a single glance told she wasn't human. Her foxlike ears twitched as her tail waved, and her golden eyes watched the horizon. She only relaxed when Nero entered her view.
Overhead, the magic circle revolved.
"Are the defenses holding?" Nero asked as she made her way forward.
"So far," the fox replied. She barely paid the other three servants any mind. "Those two managed to make something lasting, despite this… this…"
"That man called it Fimbulventr," Nero replied, steel entering her gaze. "I need to speak to the founder."
The fox priestess nodded. "Of course."
The group moved as one, crossing the city formed of pure magical energy. At its center, a crimson spear like a tree was planted at its heart. Before it stood a man with flowing hair and dark skin, clad in blue. He turned to face them.
"My children. What news do you bring?" His voice was resonant, but kind.
"Boudica continues to join her people to your brother's cause. It's all we can do to usher refugees in. Unless they leave their villages, Remus doesn't attack them." Nero clenched her fists. "And if we try to take the field directly…"
"I'm the only one who can match his consort, which leaves the rest of you to match his authorities," Romulus acknowledged. "And that is before we consider Boudica's newfound power, or Remus' court mage."
Tamamo sighed. "I've tried to contact the witch, but she keeps telling us to wait. I'm watching for signs, so I think we might see something soon. I hope."
"...endure… endure… until…"
"Chaldea. That's the name of those who will help us." Tamamo leaned around Romulus. "Right, 'Ada'?"
A woman in victorian dress stepped around Romulus, and a flow of greenish binary code bloomed from the ground. "Right, sorry." She smiled, brushing her long brown hair back. Despite her attire and address, she was clearly of Japanese descent. "I was distracted shoring up the defenses. Remus is using the snow of his stolen authority to eat away at them, so…"
"All is well, Ruler," Romulus acknowledged with a nod. "So long as you are certain, Sun of the Far East. We will endure until these allies come, and continue to rescue my children when they call."
Nero exhaled. "I never thought something like this would come during my reign…" Her eyes lowered.
"...get...through…" Caligula rumbled.
"Too right. We, the emperors past, are here to assist you," Julius said with a glint in his eye as he finally sheathed his sword.
Cleopatra gave a long sigh. "And what am I, chopped fig?"
"Romans," Tamamo droned in a dour tone.
'Ada' giggled. "You two!"
Ever so slightly, Nero relaxed. "At least laughter is still possible in these times, umu," she mused with a slight smile. It dimmed again. "I just hope… that thing doesn't decide to become proactive."
____________________________________________________________________________
He stood before the throne.
Clad in white furs against his dark skin, his hair chopped short and his eyes burning crimson, he stood with his arms crossed. A wolf pelt dangled over his head and shoulders, a massive grey thing that seemed to breathe with its own life.
"And yet another raid with minimal returns," the man with the suit said as he stepped out from behind the throne. "She's far too reliant on that rabbit to divine her decisions."
"What news, Lev?" the man boomed.
"None, really. Fenrir's Fimbulventr continues, thanks to the binding upon your soul," Lev Lainur Flauros droned. "And it's barely as if this is my concern any longer." A brief look of savage displeasure crossed his face. "After all, despite the King's requests, my allies and I must now look after these…
children."
Remus' eyes flashed. "Mind how you speak of my consort."
A soft giggle echoed. "Don't you worry, pet. It'll take more than that little fragment to rile me."
Lev stiffened as she approached.
Her golden gaze was piercing, and her walk was slow and sensuous. Her tail flowed behind her, and the bell that hung beneath her breasts jingled quietly. Her ears twitched atop her head as she fanned herself with the black silk structure.
"Did we gain any captives?" she asked, tilting her head sweetly.
Lev was quiet.
She stood beside Remus, and leaned against his muscled arm. "Pet," she cooed.
"Speak, magus."
"No, Remus-Fenrir. None taken alive." Lev grit his teeth.
The woman clicked her tongue. "Pet."
"When my consort addresses you, magus, respond to the courtesy," Remus growled.
Lev glowered as the woman smiled, idly tapping the bell with her fan.
"My apologies… Su Daji."
She giggled. "There! Was that so hard?"
"Excruciating." Lev's body flowed away, vanishing into shadow.
Daji pouted. "Well. At least we have leftovers." Her smile returned. "Perhaps next time I can go procure some more little pets to play with. It'll be lovely to see them dance on the
paolao!"
Remus chuckled. "Yes. I could not have asked for a better partner in breaking the mistake that is Rome to my will."
Daji gave him a soft peck on the cheek. "Oh, pet. You truly are fortunate our designs align so neatly."
"I am," Remus agreed easily.
Daji's eyes glimmered. "Say, shall we have some of the servants play 'cat-and-mouse'? It'll do wonders to kill the boredom."
Remus hummed. "It won't be anything they are unused to. Rome's decadence knows no bounds."
"Hehe! I'll go round them up." She ran her tongue over her lips. "And collect their clothes while I'm at it, too. Time to strip them of their assets~!"
Remus fondly watched her as she sashayed away, like a hunter on the prowl.
____________________________________________________________________________
"And that's the situation so far." The woman looked for all the world like a
babushka, wrapped in dark clothes. At least, until one saw her yellow eyes and teeth of shining black iron. "So you probably want to dress warm, whoever you send."
She glanced behind her.
Unconscious on the bed lay a woman with white hair and teal accents. Her body was clad in mythril armor and purple fabric. She breathed, but weakly.
On the floor lay a fragmented spear, broken into shards.
"And… do it soon." The witch leaned closer to the webcamera. "We're running out of time." She sat up. "We're counting on you, Solomon. Fix your fuckup." She gave an unpleasant smile as the two birds over her head, locked in a cage, began to caw.
"Baba Yaga, signing off." She clicked twice, ignoring the shouts of fear coming from Roman. Slowly, she stood up, grimacing as her bones creaked.
"Ahh… the things I do for old friends, eh Morgan?" Her eyes narrowed. "Here's hoping that Ruler of yours you started the chain summon with is up to the task. And that her little shadow can be coerced into helping with this poor damsel." She paused. "Though to be honest, that's your brat's job."
Slowly, Baba Yaga smiled.
"Heh. Alright kid. Let's see if you've got the chops to back up the guff. The bosses are buffed and you're looking at a TPK if you don't get a good spread." She rubbed her hands together. "Impress me."
____________________________________________________________________________
Slowly, Roman stood. "Da Vinci."
"Yes?" She tilted her head, smile in place.
"Give me an update on the Shroud. And tell Matthew…" he trailed off.
"Tell him?"
"Tomorrow. Tell him we're reviving Ophelia Phamrsolone tomorrow." His eyes narrowed. "If we're facing a Norse nightmare in Rome, we need her. Her, and the Saber she seeks."
AD 0060
Humanity Foundation Value: A-
Roaring Winter At Empire's End: Septem
Mad Wolf of Fratricide
___________________________________________________________________________
A/N: The first song is, naturally, 'This is Halloween' from Tim Burton's 'The Nightmare Before Christmas'. The second is '
Lycoris: Song that is Far From Over' by
EastNewSound. First link is the song, second is lyrics.
