Hold It In (RWBY/Transistor)

[KNM]

Mmm. I won't lie... I started drafting a review that I thought was perfectly polite and was about why for all that's it's very well written, I didn't really like it all that much anyways because after three separate Interludes I'd like to go back to being in the Main Character's head now please. I gave up on it because I didn't want to come across as insulting, and tone is very difficult. You write this story for free, and it is very well written, and I don't want to be discouraging or disparaging. SV might not be a hugbox but I respect you lot and didn't want to come across as being an ass.


This is what the Sidestory tab is for so you can just keep writing it here and just mark it Sidestory rather than Threadmark tab. And, also, I am not excited for this. I will not say 'please don't do this', I just... don't find it the content I was enjoying.

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Yeah I feel ya.

@Prok Not gonna lie, while the interlude was indeed well written. 4 back to back interludes spaced over months kinda just made me more eager to go back to Jaune's PoV over properly appreciating the new interludes.

I have no problem with you writing David's story. But maybe just put it in Sidestories rather than main threadmark Interludes.

Because, as you've already said. David's story has nothing to do with Jaune's. At least the rest of the interludes are connected to the overarching plot.

I feel like it'd be better off as a canon-sidestory series rather than putting it in the main thread marks when there's no overlap.

 

[ARSLOTHES]

[X] Yes- You wanna cut your teeth on this already. (Go through a tutorial/feedback session with the combat system as it stands, so we can all see what works and what doesn't. Also, the opportunity to Ping() Dove in the nuts, if that's any motivation.)

 

[Enthusiast#117]

[X] No- Eh… You had a loooooong night. You honestly don't mind just kinda zoning out until lunch. (Skip tutorial, move on to spending your lunch period picking apart the Process.)

I'm looking forward more to the coming Team conversation than anything else tbh.

 

[Sebazu]

[X] Yes- You wanna cut your teeth on this already. (Go through a tutorial/feedback session with the combat system as it stands, so we can all see what works and what doesn't. Also, the opportunity to Ping() Dove in the nuts, if that's any motivation.)

 

[Golden Eyed King]

Is beacon a good location for getting new Aura programs for the Transistor?

 

[catDreaming]

[X] Yes- You wanna cut your teeth on this already. (Go through a tutorial/feedback session with the combat system as it stands, so we can all see what works and what doesn't. Also, the opportunity to Ping() Dove in the nuts, if that's any motivation.)

Class will happen regardless; Let's take a look at the combat system as it works now, and get accustomed to it. Skipping tutorials rarely goes well, after all.

 

[THatWhichWillBe]

[X] Yes- You wanna cut your teeth on this already. (Go through a tutorial/feedback session with the combat system as it stands, so we can all see what works and what doesn't. Also, the opportunity to Ping() Dove in the nuts, if that's any motivation.)

We have a lot of complicated emotions. But that is okay.

Because bloodshed is pure.

 

[ADeshantis]

AAAAA UPDATE

Team softness is soft and I love it.

"Finally: should you ever willingly break my rules for the purpose of harming another student, I shall stop the fight by removing you from the room- via that wall," she says, gesturing to the back of the hall. "Once you have recovered in the medical ward, there will be a serious review as to whether or not your tenure at Beacon shall be continued. If you are found wanting during your probation, you will be leaving, and you will have nothing to show for it. You will be struck from our records, your weapon will be confiscated and scrapped, and we will send you the bill for the expense. The ornamental cube your weapon is reduced to will be the only evidence you ever attended Beacon, and it shall be donated to the administrative building, where it shall be used as a paperweight."

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This is possibly the most Glynda thing I have ever heard or read from any source, anywhere. It is the perfect Hunter safety warning, because you know DAMN well that she'll do it and give no fucks.

Edit: Vote.

[X] Yes

 

[Finalarcana]

[X] Yes- You wanna cut your teeth on this already. (Go through a tutorial/feedback session with the combat system as it stands, so we can all see what works and what doesn't. Also, the opportunity to Ping() Dove in the nuts, if that's any motivation.)

 

[Ghost in a wall]

[X] Yes- You wanna cut your teeth on this already. (Go through a tutorial/feedback session with the combat system as it stands, so we can all see what works and what doesn't. Also, the opportunity to Ping() Dove in the nuts, if that's any motivation.)

I think it'd be rather important to see just where we stand with the Transistor in combat with experts looking at us.

 

[cheesyme]

[X] Yes- You wanna cut your teeth on this already. (Go through a tutorial/feedback session with the combat system as it stands, so we can all see what works and what doesn't. Also, the opportunity to Ping() Dove in the nuts, if that's any motivation.)

 

[Tiypo]

[X] Yes- You wanna cut your teeth on this already. (Go through a tutorial/feedback session with the combat system as it stands, so we can all see what works and what doesn't. Also, the opportunity to Ping() Dove in the nuts, if that's any motivation.)

 

[Rhodes]

[X] Yes- You wanna cut your teeth on this already. (Go through a tutorial/feedback session with the combat system as it stands, so we can all see what works and what doesn't. Also, the opportunity to Ping() Dove in the nuts, if that's any motivation.)

Combat is fun, and based on the bits you wrote earlier for the tournament and the final exam, it feels like you have a lot of fun writing it. Some time to relax from the back to back revelations and Plot progression seems warranted.

As far as the David sidestory goes: I basically figure that if that's what you want to write, it's what you're going to end up writing at some point. The only difference is whether the plot bunny stays locked up in your notes or gets put out onto the forum to roam free. I don't have a particularly strong opinion on whether it should get its own thread or be put into sidestories here - I'd enjoy it either way.

 

[drake_azathoth]

Is that... is that a biological thing for Remnant humans and faunus, or is that our idea of the fight/flight reaction put into a spiral by a self-reinforcing cycle of emotions pushing their Aura further?

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I mean, it's kind of an issue in modern boxing/MMA amateurs and we don't breed or train people for combat from a young age much anymore -age being a major factor and part of why army recruitment used to focus on younger teens and child soldiers are totes easy-peasy to make. The adolescent brain is basically doped to the gills on fight-or-flight hormones on a near constant basis just like sexual hormones and easy to tip one way or the other for sustained periods. 'Angry young man' is a stereotype for a reason.

It doesn't take mystic mojo to make kids go berserk, a bit of pain and anger and the process of lashing out makes it hard to prevent.

 

[The Grey Mage]

[X] Yes- You wanna cut your teeth on this already. (Go through a tutorial/feedback session with the combat system as it stands, so we can all see what works and what doesn't. Also, the opportunity to Ping() Dove in the nuts, if that's any motivation.)

A chance to show off to our classmates AND clown on Dove? How can we not?

(Also I'm sure Glynda will give us good advice or something.)

 

[Zeromaru2]

[X] Yes- You wanna cut your teeth on this already. (Go through a tutorial/feedback session with the combat system as it stands, so we can all see what works and what doesn't. Also, the opportunity to Ping() Dove in the nuts, if that's any motivation.)

Maybe getting his blood pumping a bit will do Jaune some good

 

[Miffychan]

[X] Yes- You wanna cut your teeth on this already. (Go through a tutorial/feedback session with the combat system as it stands, so we can all see what works and what doesn't. Also, the opportunity to Ping() Dove in the nuts, if that's any motivation.)

Go for the eyes, Boo! Go for the eyes, yeargh!

 

[JohnGaster2000]

[X] Yes- You wanna cut your teeth on this already. (Go through a tutorial/feedback session with the combat system as it stands, so we can all see what works and what doesn't. Also, the opportunity to Ping() Dove in the nuts, if that's any motivation.)

 

[SilentMech]

[X] Yes- You wanna cut your teeth on this already. (Go through a tutorial/feedback session with the combat system as it stands, so we can all see what works and what doesn't. Also, the opportunity to Ping() Dove in the nuts, if that's any motivation.)

On the interlude of David, sidestory exists for this purpose as far as quests are concerned. Granted, the interlude is very well written, it just doesn't impact the main plot besides maybe an increase of maybe one to two lien for dust prices depending on how it plays out. Considering Jaune basically doesn't need dust anyway... I still want to see how horrible Geier winds up being, but him and David aren't connected to anyone we care about besides Weiss, and then the connection is so nebulous it might as well not be a thing. Literally people passing each other in the streets have more solid connections than Weiss has to David and she probably is the one who donated the instruments and equipment that gave rise to David's band.

 

[thepsyborg]

[X] Yes- You wanna cut your teeth on this already. (Go through a tutorial/feedback session with the combat system as it stands, so we can all see what works and what doesn't. Also, the opportunity to Ping() Dove in the nuts, if that's any motivation.)

Being totally honest here, Ping(ing) Dove in the nuts is my entire motivation here.

 

[OneirosTheWriter]

[X] Yes- You wanna cut your teeth on this already. (Go through a tutorial/feedback session with the combat system as it stands, so we can all see what works and what doesn't. Also, the opportunity to Ping() Dove in the nuts, if that's any motivation.)

How could I possibly say no to an opportunity to spare us from future Bronzewing generations.

 

[Bob Saget]

[X] No- Eh… You had a loooooong night. You honestly don't mind just kinda zoning out until lunch. (Skip tutorial, move on to spending your lunch period picking apart the Process.)

Don't feel it. We can do feedback on whatever next fight we have. This one's importance is pretty secondary.

 

[AramilOniasha]

[X] Yes- You wanna cut your teeth on this already. (Go through a tutorial/feedback session with the combat system as it stands, so we can all see what works and what doesn't. Also, the opportunity to Ping() Dove in the nuts, if that's any motivation.)

 

[FactorySmith]

[X] Yes- You wanna cut your teeth on this already. (Go through a tutorial/feedback session with the combat system as it stands, so we can all see what works and what doesn't. Also, the opportunity to Ping() Dove in the nuts, if that's any motivation.)

 

[Martenzo]

[X] Yes- You wanna cut your teeth on this already. (Go through a tutorial/feedback session with the combat system as it stands, so we can all see what works and what doesn't. Also, the opportunity to Ping() Dove in the nuts, if that's any motivation.)