The Abyssal Forest begins working on a terrifying new plan that could destroy the entire city if not stopped! When the Saints find themselves separated, Ida has to fight this new threat all alone before it can plunge the city into an eternal nightmare! Meanwhile, Inessa comes to a decision of her own!
Tune in for Episode 26: Sweet Dreams! The Saints' Counterattack Begins!
Gathering her resolve, Inessa makes a serious decision. Meanwhile Invidia arrives at a conclusion of her own. Will Castitas be able to defeat Invidia… and, even if she can, will she be able to save Chiro?
Tune in for Episode 28: Decisive Showdown! Castitas vs. Invidia!
So I was doing some data aggregation on the series, just trying to figure out where in the episode timeline of the show everything would add up. While I was doing so, I realized there's a break between Episode 26, which is chapter 15 and Episode 28, which is chapter 16.
Granted, this could be due to Chiro spending a weekend holding her fruit bat, but its kinda interesting to speculate what was happening during that period. Usually episodes involve the Saints fighting a monster of the week, but Chiro is in her room, Lupin is in the original forest, and Superbia is being a lazy butt on his chair.
Also I have a head cannon I just wanna throw out there. Planning on maybe writing an omake about it when I have time:
Abyssal beasts have upgraded forms. Superbia dragon is formerly Superbia snake. That's why he's so much more powerful than other characters in the series, and why his animal is mythological in nature.
One of the third season villains is Angelic Saint Patientia. The first male angelic saint, he shows up and is predictably a dick. He's responsible for sealing Superbia away and the father to Lupin.
IDK, we have a sinmaxing asshole who represents vice. It would be cool to have a someone show up who is completely not chill with any form of sin show up to contextualize Lupin and Temperance's past.
Also I have a head cannon I just wanna throw out there. Planning on maybe writing an omake about it when I have time:
Abyssal beasts have upgraded forms. Superbia dragon is formerly Superbia snake. That's why he's so much more powerful than other characters in the series, and why his animal is mythological in nature.
One of the third season villains is Angelic Saint Patientia. The first male angelic saint, he shows up and is predictably a dick. He's responsible for sealing Superbia away and the father to Lupin.
IDK, we have a sinmaxing asshole who represents vice. It would be cool to have a someone show up who is completely not chill with any form of sin show up to contextualize Lupin and Temperance's past.
1. Ooh, good point! I wonder what the other Beasts would upgrade into. Avaritia Hellhound? Invidia Vampire? Gula...um...Gula...
There are surprisingly few shark-based sea monsters.
2. I get the sense that the Angelic Saints are Michael's thing, not official emissaries from Heaven or the First Tree or whatever. I like the idea of a Virtue Villain, especially since that could force Avaritia to work with the Angelic Saints and realize they aren't so bad, but I don't think that villain would be called an Angelic Saint.
Also, I feel like "patience" would be an ironic virtue for someone with no patience for imperfection.
1. Ooh, good point! I wonder what the other Beasts would upgrade into. Avaritia Hellhound? Invidia Vampire? Gula...um...Gula...
There are surprisingly few shark-based sea monsters.
Leviathan, the demon, in the Lesser Key of Solomon, is associated with Envy. However Leviathan, the sea creature, is best known for eating a dude, so there's some wiggle room there.
I thought the same. Maybe Humilitas, but in the sense of "humble before God" which people can be ironically very proud of being?
It would lock Superbia out of redemption, but that's not news.
Superbia has horns. Either he's more than a mere snake, or he's really good at hiding the headband.
Anyways, the upgrades aren't just an interesting idea.
"This is the source of everything, a fruit of the First Tree! The seeds from a single one of these fruits has given us our status as Beasts."
"And a second could make us even stronger," Avaritia said, grinning, "There was some risk; the Deep Forest isn't safe and if the Saints had worked with some of its guards…" I wondered if that was a genuine worry, or a detail worked in to make it sound like I'd contributed. I hadn't even distracted Temperance. "But now that we have this, we can each take another seed to empower our sins even further. The Saints won't stand a chance against us now!"
A decisively, triumphantly trans story, no matter how deep and harrowing the despair, and there's nothing quite as immaculate a twist as "No, despite what the hot genderfluid demon wolf says, this is a completely straightforward magical girl show."
Gula Charybdis. How about it?
Updated the TV tropes article. Gonna do at some point a flyover of the story to collect moments for Heartwarming, Awesome and such.
I have fanfiction for everyone! I present to you: What have our Daughters been up to?!
Mrs. Brandt arrived at her daughters' room to inform them she has made cake.
"... what are you talking about Chiro, You're obviously cuter than me. You have Lupin and Temperance is courting you."
"She's courting you too! And you have Ida!" Chiro rebutted. "She's your partner just like Lupin is mine!"
"...Ida doesn't even know she's bi. I don't have her." Inessa grumbled.
"...she doesn't? Still? But she's obviously in love with you...." Chiro asked confused.
"I'm working on it, okay!" Inessa replied indignantly.
"Huh. So I guess you're the Lupin in this scenario."
Mrs Brandt wondered who this Lupin was and what they had to do with anything. Wait was her newest daughter dating someone?! Wait was Inessa not dating Ida?! But their so cute together! And Temperance was going after both of her girls openly?!
"...."
"See! Look at your face! You're obviously the cuter one!" Chiro chirped triumphantly.
"Don't get cocky just because you got me to blush Chiro!"
There was a distinct sound of a pillow hitting a face.
'What have our daughters been up to?" Mrs. Brandt thought as she went back downstairs to ponder over her daughters' apparently complicated love lives.
2 hours later
Mr. Brandt arrived at his daughters' room to wish them good night. As he was about to knock on the door he heard an interesting conversation. The door was left open a crack so he peered through.
"That's how you arrange dates with em?! Inessa's expression was one of shock.
Chiro shrugged. "It's the easiest way to reach em. Ey're always close. And you know our themes."
"....how is your relationship so cute?" Inessa sighed.
"....not always." Chiro said. "You know how stubborn ey are. Otherwise ey...." Chiro sniffled.
"Hey. Hey. It's okay." Inessa hugged Chiro. "We'll get through to em."
Chiro nodded Inessa's embrace. ".... incidentally, Lupin got you a gift."
Inessa released the hug but kept her hands on her sister's shoulders, "Did ey pay for it?"
"....." Chiro reached under Inessa's plush and pulled out a sloth plush with a Serious expression. "Doesn't this look like Ida?"
Inessa cuddled with the plushy, "This is so cute!!....I guess it doesn't matter."
Mr. Brandt wondered if it was okay that Inessa was so easy. Wait were his daughters associated with a criminal?!
Mr. Brandt went to the Master Bedroom to inform his wife about his discoveries. I'm the course of that conversation he discovered that apparently his daughters were also apparently the center in a web of relationships between their friends.
'What have our Daughters been up to...?' He thought bewildered. What indeed Mr. And Mrs. Brandt? It's a good thing they didn't talk explicitly about the magical girl part, isn't it? Then the girls would really have some explaining to do.
I imagine that the Brandt parents overhear the weirdest things that make no sense without context from their daughters. The girls are just barely keeping their status of magical girls a secret.
Gula Charybdis. How about it?
Updated the TV tropes article. Gonna do at some point a flyover of the story to collect moments for Heartwarming, Awesome and such.
Even if it's not literally in the title, it's still central to the series's premise. You could elevator-pitch this series as "a glorified extra in a magical girl show becomes a villain" or something, but the story uses that framework to explore a certain trans experience more than it explores magical girl tropes or whatever.
I barely used by phone before my senior year of college (not coincidentally the first year I had a smartphone), so I have no idea how significant this is for Gen Z high schoolers. Feels like it would isolate C, though, which is definitely a good thing for someone in her mental condition.
Dad had confiscated my phone and my computer, so I didn't really have a way of staying in the loop for the moment.
Has C said anything about her dad that isn't a red flag?
At least this one is a nicer shade of red.
"C! It's… it's awful," she said quietly.
I forced down the bile that rose to my throat.
Inessa blinked, then shook her head furiously, "N-no, I mean, it's awful I… I've been misgendering em this whole time! Ey probably hate me now and even if ey turns good ey'll never want to date me and…"
She paused, clamping one hand over her mouth, "I-I'm a lesbian, is it transphobic that I have a crush on em?!"
"Inessa," I rubbed the bridge of my nose, "you're kinda amazing, you know?"
I feel like the tone of Inessa's narration would be pretty similar to C. Family resemblance.
"Because she was Gula," Inessa spoke slowly, as if explaining a very obvious fact to a particularly forgetful person.
"What." I pretended confusion for as long as I could, for all that I simply couldn't escape the suddenly obvious fact that of course Temperance looked and acted almost exactly like Gula Shark had and yes, had appeared around the time Gula Shark vanished and…
"Why?" I managed, trying desperately not to wonder whether Temperance had known more than just Avaritia's identity.
"Err," Inessa looked at me in confusion. "Why what, what's wrong?"
I wonder how this played out in the theoretical anime this story was based on. How did the fandom react to Inessa revealing that no one told C about Temperance's old job?
Reminds me of the first time I saw RWBY, when I mistook Blake's bow for cat ears, thought everyone could see she was a faunus, and assumed Weiss was being a colossal bitch when she was just being kind of a dick.
[Inessa had] had everything she needed to push her darkness away. How was she to understand those who found some solace in theirs?
I wish this happened in a context where a Gilligan cut would be funny and not. this.
My dad, large enough that he was used to being imposing by default, loomed over me with an air of barely restrained anger. The beer belly he'd spent the past few years working on did nothing to lessen the menace he could exude.
I glanced past him to the row of empty beer bottles on the living room table next to a crumpled tie. Work had gotten out early then, and he'd come home and started drinking. It must not have been a good day.
Not sure how I feel about fatness and alcoholism being used symbolically this way.
Altogether, aside from the fact that he was already worked up and the earlier parts of the week had left him angrier than usual at me, it was a pretty normal talk for us. At least, it was the kind of normal we'd had for the past few months.
The way that this conversation is abstracted from dialogue into narration really emphasizes how routine this is for C. I assume it was primarily intended to get the plot point across without dwelling on the most mundanely shitty part of C's life more than necessary, but it also emphasizes that C doesn't even recognize this as remarkable. Which is horrific in its own way.
"Okay, I'm sorry." I took a deep breath and tried not to quiver. "I'm still a little worried about Inessa. Could I maybe head over to her parents' for dinner? I'll come right back as soon as we're done." I tried to keep a neutral tone of voice, but something of my anger leaked through.
And this is the point where we get back into "real time". When C messes up, breaks from the script, pisses her dad off enough to do what C kept insisting he never did.
Or perhaps I could just go to sleep and skip the part where I woke up. My dreams let me be someone else, someone powerful, someone who could still carve a place for herself even if the world had no use for her. Something about that seemed real enough to jolt me out of the fugue. I couldn't say how I knew, but it was an option if only I would choose it. It was tempting.
Inessa wouldn't forgive me.
No, they were good people. All of them, even Avaritia, would blame themselves if I vanished. I imagined mom leaving. I'd waited for her to come back at first, even fought with dad over it. I'd imagined something horrible had happened to her, and blamed myself for thinking it.
I wonder what happened to C's mom. Probably nothing remarkable, but the way she thinks about ending her own life, then slides into remembering the horrible things she thought might have happened to her mom...
At least, I told them that he hadn't actually hit me; they had to know that. I couldn't go back anymore, sure. But it was somehow absolutely important that they knew that there hadn't really been an escalation; that, even by accident, he hadn't crossed that line.
C is a master of all forms of self-delusion. "I'm a boy." "Everyone hates me." "It matters that my dad accidentally missed when he threw that bottle."
Inessa had to leave in the afternoon; apparently Temperance had run into a lifeguard who had been turned into a Resinner and I could hardly have Inessa skip a fight for my sake. It was just as well, I'd finally grown nearly tired enough to sleep. If anything could help me, it would be that.
Considering that proto-Invidia seems to have done her dastardly deeds while C was asleep, I wonder whether Avaritia noticed something was up when eir partner in crime stayed awake for like 40 hours straight. Is proto-Invidia as sleep-deprived as C must be? Or is she the opposite?
I could crush her here for having a family that wouldn't stop caring, that would accept a useless shell of a boy into their home just because he was hurting.
Does the identity-obfuscating magic work on herself? Because this has the same vibe as someone getting confused about whether their buddy was talking about the new Angelic Saint or their new classmate, noting that both of them have blue hair, and then getting back into the prior discussion without noticing anything.
"Temperance, not today. I'm never going to wear—" I tugged my ears to demonstrate, only to find my hand touching against hard metal. "Thanks. I just," had no idea what was happening. " I needed the change."
🥚❓
Either proto-Invidia put on earrings while C was asleep and forgot to take them out before waking up, or C put on earrings without thinking about it. For some reason.
Why did I have to remain this sad disgusting boy whose own father saw him for a worthless bug?
Ida: "Jealous bat? Is that a thing?"
Temperance: "Oh no."
Miasma wrapped around me, buffeting me as it scoured away everything unneeded, everything of Charleton in favor of something softer and smaller and prettier and perfect.
"With a jealous scream to shatter the night, Invidia Bat has arrived!" I let my hand fall to my side, dipping low into a curtsy and wrapping myself in my wings.
No, you baka bat, she doesn't want to hurt you! Because she likes you!
I wonder if this inability to understand Inessa's image of C will affect anything else Invidia tries to get her to do.
"What does being a girl have to do with anything?" I asked.
Inessa: "Who said anything about being a girl?"
Temperance: "Fucking 🥚."
Ida: "We can get breakfast later!"
I would fight them. I could fight them.
The seconds dragged on, a cold detente waiting for someone to give the signal for them to transform. No wait, this was bad! There were three of them and I barely had any idea how to use my powers. Besides, Inessa mostly just won, and okay, sure I was a new me, but I was still me inside the lies and… Just because I'd decided to betray everything I admired just to shine for a moment didn't mean my heart was ready to fight them right away.
"I'm gonna fight tem. Well, I could. But maybe I shouldn't. I'm outnumbered, and Inessa's pretty strong, and it's not like I'm that different from before, maybe I should just leave?"
Surprisingly, turning into a magical bat girl had not actually solved any of my problems.
I wonder whether Avaritia realizes that Invidia's not sleep-walking through life any more. Would ey focus on the ears and wings if ey realized she made her big breakthrough/debut?
I didn't need to ask how Avaritia had found me. Eir presence, now that I was aware of it, practically filled the space next to me. It wasn't a noise, but I couldn't perceive it as anything but; a percussive clash of metal on metal, ringing brightly and clearly, spreading and enveloping everything around it.
Oh, like coins.
Also, I think I know what Angelic Saint Caritas's element would be. This isn't the only reason, I have others, but...this is pretty unambiguous, aye?
Well, who'd like being so pointlessly big? Tripping over things, taking up space, everyone expecting you to be strong and tough because you're tall and broad shouldered and why was Avaritia so close!?
Do you really think so?
(plinks an Ira seed off her ears)
"Like, take you. You tried hard to be a good boy, but that obviously wasn't going to work for you. Envy was the mirror you needed to be yourself and like, I've only been around you for a few minutes and you're actually smiling now instead of making those sad little fake smiles so people think you're okay."
Okay, but did any of that require EvilTM-branded HRT, or would store-brand have worked equally well?
"It's less the philosophical defense of sin and more the whole, umm, turning people into monsters and making them rampage thing. How do we justify that?" I clarified.
I think that's the core of the problem with Avaritia's worldview. She eloquently articulates problems, and assumes anyone criticizing her solutions is denying the problems.
The powerful do whatever they want, while normal people fear doing something 'immoral' and breaking the dumb rules someone in charge set up to try and make people think like him."
This reminds me of my teenaged atheist phase. Not because I'm drawing a 1:1 between blaming all the world's problems on religious belief an blaming all the world's problems on virtue, though now that I type that I do see a parallel, but because once Avaritia's twenty-something and outgrows this mindset ey're going to cringe so hard when ey remember the shit ey said in high school.
"I'm selfish," Avaritia added sadly, "I'm pretty awesome I mean, but, well, at the end of the day, party line aside, I'm not doing this for the world. I'm doing it because I think there are people like you, like Gula, like me who need it right now and, like, ultimately, I'd let the world burn if my important people get to be happy."
It's not altruistic if I'm doing it for me. And helping my friends be happy is kinda like doing something for me. And helping people like my friends helps those friends, in a roundabout way. So when you think about it, making the world a better place is actually greedy.
...wait, that's how Objectivists and Libertarians think capitalism works.n
"Invidia Bat and, umm, he/him I guess. It's not like I have a choice about it though."
Avaritia stared at me in stunned silence for several seconds before slowly burying their face in one palm. "What?" ey asked as if I had just punched them in the nose.
I can't tell if Avaritia is offended or just confused.
"Ah," the robed figure said. "So the fourth has finally awoken. With your leave, I will allow you to attend to this, we can discuss the fruit later." Their voice had a lyrical tilt to it, and a strange ethereal quality that felt familiar in a strange way.
That's what I was now. A monster wearing a mask to pretend I had any of the qualities I admired in Inessa. Invidia hadn't changed me really. Envy would never change me, lest the face in the mirror lose its dual meanings of offer and taunt.
In another timeline, Invidia interacts with Superbia enough that Avaritia greedily forces Invidia to explain why he makes her so uncomfortable, and she explains why he reminds her of her abusive dad (despite objectively looking nothing alive even without the horns), which forces em to reconsider whether Superbia is something ey want to fight for or against.
That timeline probably doesn't do much for Chiro's mental health, though.
"No, no, like, of course your real identity is Invidia, but if you're going to sneak in to school and 'pretend' to be a girl, you can't exactly go around telling the saints who you are can you?"
Yeah. That would be as ridiculous as the watery Saint of Temperance calling herself Temperance Atwater. In a facility where she suspected Superbia Dragon might appear. Completely aburd.
"Chiro's just an identity we made up; a fake girl who doesn't exist!"
Something about the name sounded like a wish. Chiro was a nice girl, a good girl, an earnest girl whose parents may have been strict but didn't hate her and who was capable of managing the day to days of life. She would help how she could and she'd be happy doing the right thing; not so desperate to matter that she let her envy devour her alive. It wasn't my name, it wouldn't ever be my name...
I guess it's appropriate that this is the name she picked once she stopped letting her envy devour her alive, when she managed her day-to-day life, when she got parents who didn't hate her.
"Right," Avaritia sighed, "though honestly I have no idea how anyone was supposed to think you were at all a boy in the first place."
"You thought I was an incel when we met," I riposted triumphantly.
"Aww, are you still holding that against me, partner?" The line was delivered with mock sarcasm, but I could hear the hint of guilt buried in eir voice.
"No," I admitted reluctantly.
"Then it doesn't count! Even I make mistakes on rare occasions," Avaritia stuck eir tongue out at me.
"No one could make this mistake!"
"You made a bigger version of this mistake."
"Do you hate me for it?"
"No..."
"Doesn't count! Even I sometimes make mistakes."
I hope Avaritia cringes at this when she matures, too.
"Chiro you are so dumb sometimes," Lupin said, staring at me with a deep-seated affection. "The store's practically empty, no one's using the changing rooms—"
Mall Death is a crucial plot point in this story.
Well, it's a plot point.
Well, it's a thing that's relevant in one scene.
"I'm not going to do that. It's," I hesitated, unable to voice how off that felt and suddenly gripped by a feeling of intense unease, as if the winds that kept my fragile soul inflated was about to scour away this new face, "I need to sit down."
You can leave any time you like. So don't worry, sign up, never mind the second thoughts.
Ey hesitated, "The rest is a bit different from what they made you learn in school, but Superbia's like old old and he was there for a lot of it, so I trust his version."
I made a note to inquire about the version Avaritia had learned first some other time; it sounded more credible.
I trusted Lupin; despite every sane part of me telling me I probably shouldn't. I couldn't bring myself to think anything but the worst of our former guidance counselor. He was too much like dad in so many little ways to feel otherwise.
Man. Imagine how different the story could have turned out if Invidia talked about why she didn't trust Superbia Dragon instead of just quietly letting Avaritia assume it was just personal incompatability or something as she kept the two of them apart. Avaritia could use the perspective; for all the shitty Children of the Forest she knows, she probably didn't know anyone quite like C's dad.
Avaritia paused dramatically and looked to me, expectations clear in eir eyes.
"The Saints' powers?" I asked obligingly.
Ey nodded, then poked me again, "Yes, but I said not to interrupt!"
That went doubly so as Lupin had sent me to school in full makeup, green leggings under a knee length pleated black skirt and a t-shirt stenciled with green bats and my green apple earrings. Lupin's enthusiasm and spontaneity had talked me into outfits that were exactly the kind of over the top stuff she could pull off. But actually existing while actually wearing those clothes for more than the three illicit minutes it had taken to try them on and steal glances of myself in a mirror? I couldn't imagine what Inessa or Ida might say if they realized it was C underneath all these cute clothes.
Temperance would be torn between gloating about how she was right about C in a skirt and poking fun at her for how she obviously let Avaritia pick her outfit. Both true, but they're kinda contradictory.
She nodded her head in return. "I like your earrings," she said emotionlessly.
Besides, it was embarrassing! The weird fanfics and online fiction were even worse. No one would ever be allowed to know my browser history even if I had to die to protect it.
It was distinctly possible that I had acquired a small encyclopedia of bat facts in the time I'd spent avoiding Superbia. That was fair, bats were amazing. Honestly, I didn't even really deserve to be one.
When Invidia was C, she thought bats were kinda creepy, so it's fine for her to be one.
Now that C is Invidia, she realizes bats are cool actually, so it's unfair for her to be inflicted on them.
Ida hesitated for a moment, "I guess bats aren't so bad," she said in the tone of someone pretending to talk about bats...
[...]
I scratched the back of my head, "I'm fine, just… lots of new people and the pressure can kinda build a bit."
Ida hesitated, clearly not quite getting it. For all her sympathy, she didn't understand how much being the object of attention could exhaust people like me, "are you sure you're okay?"
"Just…. People can be a lot sometimes."
[...]
"...and Temperance—you'll like her—can keep anyone away who tries to talk to the new girl."
[...]
"I'm not the best with noisy crowds, and, umm, I guess a new school is really awkward, but..."
I bet Ida assumed Chiro was on the autism spectrum.
I mean, that's not the only thing she assumed about her, but Invidia's bat and sin senses (and general awkwardness) cause her to mimic some of the classic autism symptom.
"No," I shook my head, "Avar-A very good friend insisted on making lunch for my first day,"
Temperance lifted her head long enough to give me a baleful stare, then resumed ignoring this entire conversation.
...
"Ey is nonbinary I think," I corrected absently.
A strange sound, like rocks grinding against each other, seemed to emanate from Temperance's general location. I hadn't even slipped up this time!
Chiro, spivak pronouns are rare enough that Inessa and Ida are obviously going to think of A-very-good-friend when you say "ey". Or they would if it wasn't for the identity-obfuscating magic.
Anyways, Ida is the only character in this entire story who avoids making obvious blunders when hiding her secret identity.
(Unless we count Michael. And/or unless Ida keeps slipping up when talking to her teams offscreen.)
There, Charlie had been painfully withdrawn, and Invidia was obviously supposed to be evil now, so if Chiro was the kind of person to offer an attentive ear, the odds that anyone would connect us went down dramatically. And if there was anything Chiroptera would be good at it would be listening, wouldn't it?
"That's very noble of you," Ida said, and I felt a little sick. Well, I was Invidia now, and envy got to drown in its stolen valor.
"Yeah," Inessa said, "it reminds me a lot of a good friend. He was the kind of person who was always there to help, always willing to listen and help you talk through all your problems without ever getting impatient or anything. He acted all quiet and reserved a lot of the time, but really he was so nice you worried he was going to get in trouble some day."
"Oh," I said awkwardly. I was pretty sure I knew all of Inessa's friends and she'd never mentioned anyone like that. "Who's that? He sounds worth meeting."
"I'm going to the bathroom," Temperance rose and practically dashed away from the group.
Temperance, Knower of Dramatic Irony, is suffering today.
"I knew it!" she said triumphantly, "You helped them! I knew you couldn't really be evil C!"
Oh, that was absolutely nonsense. Sure, I could turn people into monsters in peace, but do one nice thing to minimize the victims of my own actions and somehow that was the only part Inessa perceived.
On one hand, I get it. It feels like Inessa's trying to define your agency out of the equation, and that sucks.
On the other hand, there are a lot of "neutral" people who wouldn't bother to go out of their way to minimize the harm caused by their actions. So yeah, not evil.
Taking a moment to breathe, I launched my best attempt at an evil laugh. "As if! No Castitas, I simply didn't want to give you any excuses about protecting civilians when I crush you like the bug you are! No, today you shall understand the true horror of Invidia Bat!"
"Also, umm what are your pronouns now?" Inessa followed up, like an absolute panic inducing monster.
"She's using she and her!" A surprising, if not unwelcome voice responded as Avaritia dashed out from behind Beaker Breaker swinging both claws at Castitas.
"Great! I'm really glad for you!" she said, looking back at me despite the angry wolf trying to claw her eyes out.
"Right! To be clear, Castitas, it's because in the depths of my envy I have copied your pronouns as well as your face! Not, like, any other weird reason or anything!"
No one is taking this seriously. Also, no one asked for an explanation, 🥚. You're the one making this weird.
"Biding until Invidia is too much to bear," Temperantia drily stepped out of the staircase.
"Yeah!" Avaritia sighed, betraying me without a moment's hesitation.
"Hey, what about me is unbearable? Besides how unbearably dangerous and threatening I am!" I glared at the pair of them.
And yet, I wasn't sure what to do. The heat of the fight had suddenly left me and I didn't know how to end any of this. Was I supposed to keep pressing, to do that for real?
"GET OFF HER!" Ida's voice—carrying a heat I'd never heard from the stoic Saint—saved me from myself.
...
I allowed myself to fall up into the sky. I'd done it. I'd beaten Inessa. I'd proven that even I could fight just as well as any of them if I had the chance; that I could be as good as any of them when I wasn't even a real girl. So, why wouldn't my hands stop shaking?
Maybe you're not as evil as you think you should be.
As always it's thanks to the wonderful beta readers I definitely don't deserve that this is readable at all. @NemoMarx@Gargulec@veteranMortal and @Chehrazad are honestly more than I deserve!
Here, have a short. Lupin heard a knock at eir door, sending a spike of fear. Ey carefully went to it, ready to transform and portal out. Or at least, so ey thought. As soon as ey opened the door, ey froze. It was her, that swordswoman
Acheron also stood still, looking at em. She seemed to be in a deep internal conflict, hesitating to speak. Lupin wondered if she was composing some words of judgement, if she was considering how to keep colateral damage down. Eir mind kept going back to that fight. When Superbia threatened the nighborhood, and Acheron pulled out her sword. The night uncle... Finally, Acheron spoke, embarrassed:
"I got... lost. And detected you in the area. Could... you help me?"
--
"...We're lost." Said Lupin.
"It would seem so. Oh, is that Ida, I think her name was?"
"Wha- Crap! Let's hide." Lupin pulled a confused Acheron with em behind an advertisement screen on a bus stop, watching nervously as Ida moved.
"Why? I thought you weren't so hostile to each other at this point?" Nevertheless, she played along.
"Look, things between are just, complicated. I don't want to meet them."
Finally, Ida seems to move away, and the two move again. At least, until they saw Chiro walk out of a shop and check the front of another. Panicking, they shoved themselves into a crowd of people in odd costumes. Fortunately, they were rather welcoming, though neither of the two aliens could quite follow the discussion of a story their impromptu friends were rather passionate about. Nevertheless, Acheron found herself quite engrossed in what she could catch of this tale of time travel, programming, video games and jokes borne from this planet's electronic network. Finally, Lupin catches her attention.
"She left. Can't you remember anything else about the place?"
At this, Acheron paused. As she reached for her blade's handle, Lupin was sure ey had screwed up. Eir mind conjured memories, of the blast, everything shaking, the glow. However, she merely held her sword, thinking, then rattled off more information, restarting the goose chase across the city. At least, until Lupin froze, sweating.
"Ugh, now the sharky and Inessa too? Oh no, I think they saw us! What now?" Eir eyes darted around, knowing the stoplights would change soon.
"...I may have a solution. With me."
"... Wait, you don't mean to hide inside trashcans? That's disgusting! We'll get- what." Ey stared at the now empty and pristine cans Acheron held.
"Lupin!" Two voices called, and the Beast jumped into the can, closing it as Acheron did the same. The Saints came by, looking around, then leaving in sadness and frustration. They then left the cans, freezing when they saw someone staring at then.
"Why, hello there, Galaxy Ranger." Said a beautiful redhead in a white dress, staring at them in amusement.
"Hello, Himeko. Lupin, this is Himeko, a friend from the Astral Express. Himeko, this is Lupin, an acquaintance from this planet. We're, uh, looking for a building."
"Uh, hello. Lupin Noir, spivak pronouns."
"A pleasure, Lupin. Acheron, I believe you mean you asked someone for directions, and ey got lost too?" At their silence, she chuckles. " As I thought. But that doesn't explain how you two ended up in trashcans. Did our raccoon's habits rub off on you?"
"Ah, well. There were some people I'd, uh, rather not talk to. You know, things are very complicated between us, so..."
"Well, I'd advise you not to do so for long. Avoidance and leaving things unspoken just leads to regret. Either way, why didn't Acheron use that presence erasing trick she has? Welt told me about it."
The wolf's head whirled to the Self-Annihilator. "You could do that?"
"...It seems to be suffering interference. Believe me, trashcans aren't my preference for relaxation."
"Well, either way, allow me to help you. Just give me the place." As she said that, she pulled out sheets of paper. "I'll make sure to write it down for you two."
The grateful but embarrassed pair gladly took her up on the offer, and headed to the subway.
"...So, uh, you have those friends from the space train." Said Lupin, trying to fill the silence.
"Hm? Ah, yes, the Astral Express Crew... They're looking for a thing on this planet, with the help of the Saints... Also, Stelle has someow gotten involved with the management of this nation's railways. I never asked the story, but she seems, as always, adept at such jobs."
--
Finally, they stood in front of the building. As Lupin made to wave and leave, Acheron reached into her left sleeve, much toe ir confusion.
"What are you-"
"Here, for your time."
Peaches. She, somehow, pulled peaches out of her sleeve. Lupin numbly accepted the gift, returning her wave as she entered the bulding. Lupin found a corner to collect eir thoughts, and then create a portal home. Once inside, ey considered bringing eir uncle his favorite fruit might be good for his recovery. On the other hand, he'd go ballistic if he knew it came from an enemy. Giggling, ey decided to just store them and lay down. That feeling when, in the middle of a story, you realize a character has a power that unravels it. I'll just leave it as, either the identity magic or tree stuff in general can interfere somehow, or acheron was trying to nudge Lupin into talking to the others.
At first, I thought of ahving Superbia dead, but I imagine Lupin's mental state, and fear of the swordswoman, would be too bad for the plot. And Acheron is rather restrained and merciful.
"Chiro!" ey greeted me. "You're okay? Nothing bad happened back there?"
I thought of the sensation of my hand around Inessa's neck.
"I'm fine," I said instead. My tone didn't quite manage to reach reassuring.
...
What would my partner think of me if ey knew how close I'd come? I hadn't meant to hurt Inessa; however much she irritated me, however impossible it would be to go back, however much I wished I could take everything she had and make it mine...I didn't want to hurt her.
And yet, I wasn't sure what would have happened if Ida hadn't intervened at the end. Would I have stopped? Would I have been too caught up in that unfair anger at how she refused to see me as the monster I was?
Poor Chiro, trying to act like the villain she's told to be.
"Like I said, Ida stopped me." I shrugged. I'd been glad to be freed from the impossible situation. And yet, I couldn't know what would have happened if she hadn't been there. Would I have pulled myself back from that edge? Why had I gotten there in the first place?
"The Saints are tough," Avaritia said. "They wouldn't have stuck around if they'd break that easily."
Having Beaker Breaker just OHKO Ida changes how you read this line. Sure, history/genre convention suggests that the Angelic Saints wouldn't just get killed in some random battle. But they also suggest that a Resinner shouldn't take out one of the Saints so quickly, without one of the others jumping in to save her. Chiro's watched enough magical girl anime to recognize when genre convention can no longer help anyone.
I wasn't like Inessa. For me, being honest felt like tearing off my skin and shoving my bleeding insides into everyone's faces.
Shopping cures the sinful little voice in eir head. If you'd asked Superbia, he probably would have told you to leave, because he doesn't want to admit that he looks in a mirror when he's feeling down.
"You see young Chiro," eir tone was insufferably smug, "you're worried about your sin, what the seed wants from you, or rather, what you really feel."
I wondered if that was true, was the seed simply a reflection of my own envies? Its influence felt more like an intruder at times. But I also hadn't realized how much Inessa's simple existence made me burn until so recently.
On one hand, it's ridiculous that so many readers (more than one) bought Avaritia's claims at face value when Chiro constantly comments on how her seed feels like an intruder.
On the other hand, Avaritia does sound confident, and Chiro rationalizes it pretty well.
Back on the first hand, when have Chiro's rationalizations about what's going on in her heart ever been accurate? She didn't admit she was a real tgirl until after she'd both socially transitioned and started taking HRT. What is she, the UK government?
"It's youth! Youth!" Avaritia said, cutting through my circling thoughts with mock outrage.
A hollow, thumping beat caught my attention. Slow and echoing, it seemed to almost pull everything around it into itself, or it would have, were it not so poorly nurtured. I had it in me to fix that.
Avaritia tugged on my arm and, embarrassed, I withdrew my free finger from my mouth and wiped the drop of blood off against my skirt, eliciting a painful wince from the wolf next to me. Right, I was listening, not making monsters.
Invidia has all the instincts to be a great villain. If Superbia could hollow out those pesky independent thoughts and free will, the Saints would be in trouble.
That particular want, even Avaritia agreed, was the seed mostly. And yet, refusing that urge earned no punishments.
"Your what anxiety?"
"Gender anxiety. From pretending I'm a girl even though I'm a worthless boy."
"Are you sure that's why you're anxious? Cis boys don't feel anxiety over pretending to be girls, just shame."
"How would you know? You're actually a girl!"
And yet, I'd only had Chiro's mask for a single school day, and even then, the idea of losing it was agony.
...
Was some of it because I wanted to keep being Chiro? There was a part of me that liked playing dress-up with Lupin and pretending to be a normal girl, for all that actually appearing in public like this left me a constant blushing mess, bouncing endlessly between anxiety and anticipation. Chiro was supposed to be a mask. Those feelings shouldn't have mattered; they did anyway.
Real "We could get killed, or worse, expelled!" energy. In a peaceful universe, C is the nerdy friend whose shared notes are single-spacedly boosting her friends' grades.
"I was going to be Ira," Temperance non-sequitured instead. "We'd just run away. I was… angry," she smiled ruefully, or at least she tried. Any expression at all still looked forced on her face. "Back then, all I wanted was to lash out at everything. Avaritia was scared it would consume me."
Obviously, Temperance overcame that problem. She's calm now, calm as still water. And, it occurs to me, one of the ways that calmness manifests is patience. (TL Note: Patience is the cardinal virtue opposing wrath.)
After all, I was just the cheap copy, the second-rate replacement Lupin had picked up by the side of the road with looks stolen from Inessa and apparently enough feminization that you could almost confuse my plot arc for Temperances'.
Well, if it looks like a shark, walks like a shark, and quacks like a shark...
Okay, it looks like a fox and quacks like a bat. But you know what I mean.
I bit back laughter. As if I could go back. As if I didn't know already that for all its gifts, sin would never set me free. As if my envy would leave me any room to imagine salvation from its stolen beauty. Worst, the seed was still better than remaining where I'd been.
Okay… nice dichotomy, IDIOT ‼ what lies outside it???
And sure that meant sneaking into an empty classroom for lunch, but I was evil now! That meant I could do rebellious things like have lunch outside the cafeteria!
Okay, so I still felt a little guilty about breaking the rules, but—
I stand by what I said about Invidia's instincts. This is conscious, learned behavior, my friends.
He eyed me silently for a few moments, "I must say, I did not expect this degree of aberration, boy."
For once he wasn't twisting things around. My sin had transformed me in strange ways. And yet, it still inspired a spike of icy rage that threatened to overcome my instinctive fear at his presence.
🍳
...there are not many egg emoji. This is the closest I could find to "boiled egg".
My first battle had been a heat of the moment thing. I had been angry and stupid and had someone there that stimulated all of my instincts as the incarnation of envy.
See? Chiro attributes the results of that battle to instinct, too!
But, having let Avaritia dress me up twice, it would have obviously been suspicious to any snooping magical girls if I stopped now. So, despite the absence of the wardrobe police, I had literally no other choice than to keep dressing up in cute outfits and doing my makeup every morning.
I blushed, because obviously this would embarrass Chiro. Invidia—the very serious, scary, evil bat—had abandoned mundane emotions like shame, so I would never really be awkward or shy about this, I just had to keep up appearances.
Who are you trying to fool? Yourself? Are you really that much of a gullible patsy?
Inessa tutted, "Ida, Ida Ida…" then she turned to me and explained for my benefit, "she had Javed agree to manage the girls basketball team and then kept having 'study sessions' with him where she actually just studied the whole time."
Ida had the grace to blush, "How was I supposed to know that Javed didn't mean studying when he said I should come over to study! Studying is important and working side by side with your boyfriend just seems like it would be really nice…"
I'm not surprised that there isn't an "easter egg painted with the lesbian pride flag colors" emoji, considering that there isn't even a lesbian pride flag emoji. (Just rainbow and transgender.) But it would be convenient if there was.
I didn't know a thing about dating boys, and despite being one for most of my life, my own gender seemed an alien species to me half the time.
Nia had said that a style change could change your perspective. Inessa had joked about winning over Lupin with a new look. And yet, I had no value of my own. I was an imitation, nothing more. My sin writhed at the idea of breaking that pattern.
"Actually," I said, wincing at a sudden burst of tightness in my chest, "let's change things up a lot. Something shorter? More stylish? Like a…." My sin writhed in irritation under my skin. Its roots gently tightened around my heart and it tore at the underside of my skin, peeling away at me as if to say this mask was a gift and a reminder, and if I refused to play my part it could be torn off of me at any moment.
And… could I really just do that again? Mr. Brown had been one thing. His anger demanded release; but Kelly's sin was smaller for now. I ached to set it free, as I always craved sin's release, but it was harder to justify forcing it.
[...]
But my sin was unhappy with me, and this restraint was one imposition too many. A flicker of weakness was all it took to let Envy's thorns pierce my skin, to let myself push a single drop of sap into her chest. We were close enough that it wasn't hard to hide. At least this helped calm the writhing envy inside of me.
I know that no one still thinks the Invidia seed is just a part of Chiro which C had previously repressed, but going back and binge-reading how very silly that reading of Invidia Bat's soul was...it feels nice. It partially counters the dismay of seeing Chiro accidentally ruin the day because the vile seed in her chest was bullying her over a haircut.
Inessa Brandt refused to see that any of it was my choice. To her I remained an object in her story. Even now, she refused to abandon me, refused to just let me sink into the Abyss.
Those are both true statements, but I don't think Inessa would let you sink into the Abyss if she realized how much of this you wanted. Or even if she assumed you wanted everything you think you want.
"BEAKER!" The Resinner shouted enthusiastically and moved to follow my command. At which point it was once again smashed to the ground, this time by a boulder impacting the side of its face.
...huh. That doesn't seem to fit with other Resinner names. Is it that Resinner's name, or do Avaritia and Invidia's Resinners have different magic speech impediments?
