The Long Night Part One: Embers in the Dusk: A Planetary Governor Quest (43k) Complete Sequel Up

Investigate the Sea?

  • Yes

    Votes: 592 80.3%
  • No

    Votes: 145 19.7%

  • Total voters
    737
@atrophy , @Azgrin
If the thread is really strongly against an under empire composed of rodent people than I can change it.

The (hopefully really large)Omake I'm writing doesn't strictly require that the more industrial polity included in it be solely composed of rodent people, it could be multi-racial, and it doesn't have to be an empire, if you want to suggest another system of political organization(maybe a federation? or a theocracy? do you have any better ideas?). But it does need to have rat people prominently featured in positions of authority on the specific (underpolity)expedition that the human expedition runs into, as a side effect of plot points I have planned out.(in omake justification, something to do with there being a territory of rodent people nearby? as one of the Federation's provinces?)
I think you can go for a Fallen London kind of thing. If you want to make a civilisation, don't make it an empire. Instead, make it a single relatively small bastion that for some reason is safer than everywhere else in the caverns. Maybe it's a geographical quirk, or a powerful psychic leader, or a warding system made from the bones of a dead god, or some advanced human archeotech, or any other possible thing or combination of things. The caverns are meant to be mega double deadly and by no means should any kind of civilisation naturally be possible there, so there has to be some exceptional reason for one to exist, and said civilisation must be limited and unable to expand.

Rodent people...can work, but I don't recommend it. If you do do it, don't make them rip-offs of the Skaven, especially in terms of physiology. One idea is that instead of them merely resembling rats, they could in fact be descended from actual rats, ones which came from the first Dark Age ships to arrive on Avernus. Not sure if this is a good idea or not so use your best judgement. Don't do rodent people unless you're doing a federation.

Theocracy is a bad idea. Federation works, but you'll need at least 4-6 separate races. Having a single race is perhaps the easiest and simplest way to do it, so do this if you don't think you can pull off a federation.
 
@atrophy , @Azgrin
If the thread is really strongly against an under empire composed of rodent people than I can change it.

The (hopefully really large)Omake I'm writing doesn't strictly require that the more industrial polity included in it be solely composed of rodent people, it could be multi-racial, and it doesn't have to be an empire, if you want to suggest another system of political organization(maybe a federation? or a theocracy? do you have any better ideas?). But it does need to have rat people prominently featured in positions of authority on the specific (underpolity)expedition that the human expedition runs into, as a side effect of plot points I have planned out.(in omake justification, something to do with there being a territory of rodent people nearby? as one of the Federation's provinces?)
I'm not against it, it'd just really suck to deal with the Skaven on top of everything else. If you want to write an Omake and Durin makes it canon?

I'll just have to deal with it.
 
I think you can go for a Fallen London kind of thing. If you want to make a civilisation, don't make it an empire. Instead, make it a single relatively small bastion that for some reason is safer than everywhere else in the caverns. Maybe it's a geographical quirk, or a powerful psychic leader, or a warding system made from the bones of a dead god, or some advanced human archeotech, or any other possible thing or combination of things. The caverns are meant to be mega double deadly and by no means should any kind of civilisation naturally be possible there, so there has to be some exceptional reason for one to exist, and said civilisation must be limited and unable to expand.

Rodent people...can work, but I don't recommend it. If you do do it, don't make them rip-offs of the Skaven, especially in terms of physiology. One idea is that instead of them merely resembling rats, they could in fact be descended from actual rats, ones which came from the first Dark Age ships to arrive on Avernus. Not sure if this is a good idea or not so use your best judgement. Don't do rodent people unless you're doing a federation.

Theocracy is a bad idea. Federation works, but you'll need at least 4-6 separate races. Having a single race is perhaps the easiest and simplest way to do it, so do this if you don't think you can pull off a federation.

I've been looking on the Fallen London wiki, but it's actually really poorly organized for a person trying to figure out how that world works, it's only really organized to help out a person in playing the game.

As for subterranean intelligent races, I had been planning to have the intelligent races of the underground be mostly really dangerous tribals, preserved by a quirk of the underground fungal forests that works against those creatures that aren't discriminating in where they attack or use their powers.
I'd been intending to copy the following almost verbatim to create the subterranean people races:
DF2014:Animal people - Dwarf Fortress Wiki
After all, the hordes of soul eating creatures down there have to eat something, they don't come up the the surface much, and I understand that the souls of sapient creatures are especially tasty and nutritious, they must have a local source.

But you're right, any empire, or expansionist state would fail, how-bout a federation of races, that happens to live in a quirk of geography, that was chosen as a defensible research outpost during the Age of Technology, for the defensibility of that bit of geography, and additionally worships, feeds most of their souls to, and are defended by more powerful, sapient soul eating creatures.
Their expedition would be in search of exploitable natural resources outside of their enclave, to bring back, rather than searching for expansion.
 
Actually cool idea would be for ratfolk to revere if not outright worship humans, especially if they are protected by human archeotech. They know that it was thanks to humans that relatively insignificant rodent species with limited habitat spread all across the globe, and later, all across the galaxy. It's the human who brought them to Avernus which led them ataining sapience and strength. It's the human books and databases that gave them knowledge of history and galaxy, of science and technology, of art and literature, of ethics and pholosophy.

Maybe even have them believe that humans are extinct (they may knew that human presence in Helheim was destroyed by MoI and after no humans showed in millenia they may came to conclusion that humans lost the war and went completely into hiding) and it's their duty as inheritors to preserve their legacy.

And rat-people in fantasy usually are evil guys in fiction because humans tend to associate them with pest that destroy food and spread disease, but they're smart and social animals, and to survive on Avernus, at least as a civilisation, those two traits would have only developed further. I would like to see nice, loyal and closely knit ratfolk for once.

As for apearance - I agree just copying Skaven visually would be lame. Maybe sothething more animalistic, like one of those semi-bipedal rodents like voles (to allow using forelimbs for minipulation), maybe add an extremely dextrous prehensile tail to supplement it.
 
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Can't we have Chewbacca race the Wookiee instead. They are good with tech and friendly to humans. Also the could be the proto Jakero race.
 
And rat-people in fantasy usually are evil guys in fiction because humans gtend to associate them with pest that destroy food and spread disease, but they smart and social animals, and to survive on Avernus, at least as a civilisation, those two traits would have only developed further. I would like to see nice, loyal and closely knit ratfolk for once.
As for apearance - I agree just copying Skaven visually would be lame. Maybe sothething more animalistic, like one of those semi-bipedal rodents like voles (to allow using forelimbs for minipulation), maybe add an extremely dextrous prehensile tail to supplement it.
Yes, this idea pleases me.
That said, I've already decided I'm going to make divisions between the under-races in my omake more about way of life than about species.
Edit: and that actually helps out with the ratpeople-related plot-point I have.

And they might afford deep religious or non-religious respect for the people who built the ancient defenses they partly rely on, though whether they acknowledge that that was humans is another matter entirely.
 
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Yes, this idea pleases me.
That said, I've already decided I'm going to make divisions between the under-races in my omake more about way of life than about species.
Edit: and that actually helps out with the ratpeople-related plot-point I have.

And they might afford deep religious or non-religious respect for the people who built the ancient defenses they partly rely on, though whether they acknowledge that that was humans is another matter entirely.
Can'y You just have them worship the old ones instead? That make more sense.
 
Can'y You just have them worship the old ones instead? That make more sense.
Maybe, but primitive cultures tend to worship personifications of thing that have a significant influence on their lives, or people that effect or represent things that have significant influence on their lives.
If religion of the cavern races even comes up(it might not), I would probably have them worship things related to the things that effect their survival, X God, who planted the ward-trees, Y Goddess, who's heartbeat can be felt in the chests of the giant cave crocodiles we ride, and her footsteps in the thudding of their feet, Z Deity, who altered the land and built those walls to create this haven, The Giant Hungry Mouth we occasionally toss people into so it doesn't lure us all into jumping in, The Powerful Creepy Soul Eating Guy we feed souls so he'll defend everyone in our troop below a certain age, ETC.
 
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That said, I've already decided I'm going to make divisions between the under-races in my omake more about way of life than about species.
This is good. Having cultural variety within a complex race is realistic, interesting, and gives a great amount of Your Dudes potential.

I'm looking for challenges of body, mind, sanity, and martial skill, mostly to cut down on the amount of original thinking I have to do, and it's been mentioned that Fallen London has the right theme and environment.
What you want are allusions and altered general themes. Make sure that whatever you put in is not a direct expy. That said, my idea to "go for a Fallen London" just meant to take the idea of a weird, dark city (with assorted races) within a weirder, darker world, a city with stories, mysteries, and potential adventures. I didn't mean anything more specific than that.
 
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But aren't the Necrons keeping the Tyranids away ? Surely the Eldar must have foreseen what would happen if they attack the Necrons while they are engaged with the Tyranids.
No, they are planing for eventuality of 'crons returning after defeating tyranids (or, well, tyranids coming after defeating necrons. Either or.)
 
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But aren't the Necrons keeping the Tyranids away? Surely the Eldar must have foreseen what would happen if they attack the Necrons while they are engaged with the Tyranids.
I assume that has something to do with why they chose this particular moment to free the Krork and distract the Necrons, as part of a grand strategy informed by their ability to divine for way more stuff than us.
It might have gone a little off the rails with the Awakening of the Ork gods.
 
Anyone doing omakes should remember that the sapient wildlife that Jacob is most likely to encounter are the trolls, who have been bribed into being allies.
 
The Rhythm of War
The Rhythm of War

The Craftworld of Alaitoc, once one of the mightiest refuges of the First Born drifted silently through the void of space, it's great buttresses, arching spires and silvered skin distorted and dispersed.

To those few that could see through its disguise they would see nothing except for an abandoned world ship, drifting despondently through the void.

Not so within. The razor-sharp focus and will power of the Alatiocans that was legend among the Eldar was being stretched to the limit. They wished to cry out in joy, in song. To dance in joy for their release from She Who Thirsts.

Alas it was not to be, they must stay the course, silent as the night as they approached their pray. All the divinations of the Farseers had led to this moment, bait had been set and so carefully brought to the attention of the Infinite to draw him personally out of his home and away to the other side of the galaxy, far enough away that he would not be able to return immediately.

So too had the Farseer's struggled with the defences of Solemnance, against the pitifulness fortifications of one of the greatest Crypteks to ever live that rendered their fumbling with the skein of fate as worthless the cries of children.

And yet, despite all that they were triumphant. They knew where and how to free them, the last remnant of their ancient allies and they were willing to die to the last in the effort, for on their efforts lay the skein of fate.

All those that remained in the Craftworld gathered together, as Autarch Lisenel the Darkblade stood forth, the last Autarch of the Craftworld and the most skilled to have ever graced its halls. He spoke to them of their duty.

He spoke to them of their honour, of their duty, of their ability. He inspired them and gave them hope even as they knew they were marching towards certain doom and they were.

For they went to Solemnance, the endless gallery of Trazyn the Infinite. His armies were beyond count, organised by some of the greatest minds of the Necrons, with technology and secrets so advanced that it was legendary.

And yet they went anyway, their faith in their purpose assured. With the full power of their psycic abilities restored they began their assault, the rangers teleporting down to the planet below cloaking themselves in shadows.

But, even the legendary abilities of the Star Striders could not protect them for long from the watchful eyes of Solemnance who could monitor their very souls. Soon the halls of the eternal gallery ran red with the blood of the Eldar, as the frozen faces of millions upon millions of kidnapped beings watched on, unchanging and unblinking.

However, these deaths were necessary for they hid the two who were making their way deeper and deeper into the depths of the gallery, their passage hidden by the deaths of their kin.

Arisrith gritted her teeth as she moved silently through the deserted halls, deep deep within the planet's core, hidden behind uncountable layers of traps and puzzles. She was one of the brightest Star Striders of her generation, but she would have been at a loss to move through this labyrinth if not for Lisenel, who's steady hand had guided her through the danger and forwards ever forwards.

She did not know why she had been chosen, only that the prophecy insisted that she was required. And that the Autarch would die. He had accepted that as his fate, but she still felt troubled. That he should die, and accept it so casually felt wrong to her.

Then they stepped through one last gate and she felt something change. It was the weight. The sheer age of this place was overwhelming a cloying suffocating thing that pressed down upon her due to the how ancient this place was, that had sat undisturbed for uncounted millions of years.

"We have arrived." The soft voice of the Autarch recovered her to her senses as she saw and gasped. Alcoves millions of them moving up higher and higher, until she could see no further. She looked left and right and saw the same thing.

"This is the centre of his collection, his maybe even his first I do not know. But our quarry is here, and we must find it." She nodded and followed him as they moved past the countless exhibits moving deeper and deeper into this place until finally he pointed.

An alcove, but unlike the rest sealed off from the others, necrontyr runes emblazoned in glowing green across the sealed door. She could read them, they warned of danger and terrible punishments for any that attempted to access this vault and she understood that here was what they were searching for. What they would find exactly she did not know, but their time was at hand.

Glancing from side to side she approached tense, terrified at the sound of her own breathing the only sound she could hear in this place of utter stillness and quiet.

But, not threat appeared. Instead they came to the console and she knew what she had to do.

Then they heard the sound. A hideous cracking sound as behind them emerged a form. Black as the endless night and it looked at them with silvered eyes, before it appeared in front of her it's clawed hand about to enter her stomach.

With a dull thud so unlike metal on metal the black blade of the Autarch deflected the hand from crushing her heart, though it dragged a hideous trail of blood and torn flesh in her chest as she gasped and fell back on the control console, the wound the creature had inflicted steaming, shrivelling and dying.

The Autarch stood in front of her sizing up his enemy that merely cocked its head before going on the offensive so fast that he was instantly forced on the defensive, slowly being beaten back.

Arisith turned her attention to the console while her protector fought in the back ground, the training she had been given in the Necrontyr tongue supplemented by her rapidly accelerated course in divination and history to unlock and bypass the securities that the Infinite had woven into his lock.

But not fast enough. She could feel the Autarch weakening, his blade invulnerable, but even his skill was nothing compared to the creature he fought spawned from the mind of Trazyn, which seemed to grow faster and more skilled as he weakened.

Soon he was beaten back and fell to the floor desperately struggling to rise as his flesh shrivelled and decayed as blood poured from gaping tears cut into his body as the creature turned its attention to her.

It walked over, seeming to relish every moment of it, as her fear grew harsher and harsher against her mind threatening to overwhelm her concentration. And then she was through. With the last strength in her arms leaving her she finished the final combination as the silver specks that seemed to be the creature's eyes widened as if in horror.

Its foot was coming down upon her head within moments, but it was still.

Too.

Slow!

A great green arm reached out and grabbed it, thicker and longer than her whole body as the body of the creature was reduced to nothing with a flash of green lightning the roar of a creature long held echoed around her deafening her.

The cell finally opened, and she gasped in instinctive fear. Seven metres tall, with green skin so dark she could almost mistake it for black, clad in armour that sparked with green lightning. Behind it lurked several other massive creatures dressed in similar manners.

Krork.

Her mind instinctively provided her the answer, these were the Krork. The Warmasters of the Old Ones.

Her saviour's eyes jerked down to her and with a small motion the other smaller Krork stepped forwards eyes alert for any sign of danger as it motioned to one of them, dressed in white armour. "Tend to the Aeldari."

As the white armoured one knelt by her saw its hands spark with the green energies of the waagh, which instead of being caustic and harsh were warm and soothing. A stark difference to the Weird Boyz who wielded it in the wider galaxy. At the…Doctor Krork's touched her flesh she immediately felt the difference as her wounds began to close and heal, her desiccated flesh returning slowly to pinkness and health.

"How long?" The largest Krork stood before her, before she stood and bowed though she jerked up as a growl emanated from its throat. "How long Aeldari? How many years have I been gone from the front that your kind have been reduced to such…pitiful weapons and armour?"

Swallowing the fear, she felt in her heart she looked the Krork in the eye. "It has been over 60 million years, my lord." As she said those worlds she could hear sharp intakes of breath from around her as the other Krork understood. Though it was the leader she focused upon as it's fists clenched, the green lightening that surrounded it convulsing and growing brighter.

"Trazyn! That cursed skeleton!" With that it roared. A roar of loss and sorrow. Within an instant it turned to its subordinates. "Free them, we must make haste. This world will burn." With eager nods the others left leaving her alone with the warlord who turned to her.

She couldn't let this happen, they had just freed them after so long. She could not let them perish for some foolish desire for revenge.

"My lord, you mustn't." It stopped and looked at her, a grin sliding onto its tusked visage. "Mustn't you say. It really must have been 60 million years if one of your kind are the ones counselling caution. Very well tell me. Why must I not burn this world to ashes?"

She mustered her courage and spoke. "The War in Heaven is not over. Even though the Star Gods lie shattered the Necrons still live, the Silent King is distracted destroying a threat that threatens the galaxy itself. We need your people, the Warmasters of old to defeat him when he returns so weakened are we. Weakened by our own mistakes, our own foolishness and pride for we have nearly damned the galaxy ourselves."

"I cannot let you fall now. Not after all we have sacrificed…" She choked, for she saw the Autarch's body. A contented smile still glistening on his face.

"Ahh foolish Aeldari."Its voice like the clashing off two worlds rumbled and shook the ground in front of her. "Did you assume that I would attack this world without a plan?" No that shaking was something else. The march of feet.

"Your kind must have forgotten us for some reason." She shrieked as she was lifted from her feet by a finger and thumb large enough to pulp her body and turned around and what she saw made her eyes expand wide in shock.

Krork. Hundreds of thousands. Millions. Billions of beings that resembled orks marching in lockstep formation, guided by the towering forms of true Krork.

"My Brethren! By now you no doubt know of what has transpired. Our mortal enemy Trazyn, had trapped us within a cage of time. No doubt he though to humiliate us, to make us eternally fail our calling. But, his little joke has backfired." With that he stamped, the shock wave ringing across the floor setting a rhythm for the rest to follow, stamping along in time.

"Because we. Are. The. Krork. We are those that bring slaughter upon our foes. We are the ones that were forged in war, moulded by conflict and tempered by duty. We are the Masters of War."

The stamps were growing louder and louder as a green haze filled the room, lightning striking again and again only to be channelled to the tall Krorks bearing staves emblazoned with sigles of power.

"We are the Krork, we are Slaughter, we are…"

It was like she was waiting for the approach of a thunder storm; the sudden silence was deafening. In that instance she knew what she was. An insect looking upon the mightiest predators to ever grace the galaxy.

"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR"

From uncountable throats came the roar as, the sheer power in that one word echoed out denting the living metal walls of the labyrinth of Trazyn as she was tossed across the shoulder of the Marshall as he led the War of the Krork into the Battle once more.

Trazyn the Infinite knew something was wrong. He had linked himself to the cell of his most prized and feared artefact millions of years ago. He could not allow it to be freed. He returned utilising science and methods incomprehensible to most.

But he was too late. The Krork were free and they were on a rampage. With fury in his mechanical heart the master of Solomnace turned too it's defence and such a battle was waged within the heart of that dread world that it spawned a million songs of lore.

The two rivals of the War in Heaven met on the field of battle once again as the infinite legions of the Necrons met with the masters of War for the first time in millions of years.

In the end the outcome was certain, the Krork escaped aboard the craftworld. Solomnace was battered, but it was not broken. Slight comfort to Trazyn who raged within his home. His galleries destroyed by the rampage of the Krork.

Or worse.

For the Krork had not escaped alone, for with the guidance of Arisrith, they had freed all those that they could and all those that wished escaped with them in their flight as they carried away the artefacts the Infinite had so jealously hoarded.

When they finally stopped safe from the wrath of Trayzn for now, it was not merely the Krork that disembarked, but also thousands of regiments of Imperial guard who had served as props in Trazyn's many pieces, at least one squad of every chapter that had ever existed in the Imperium from the time when they were loyal, for Trayzen's obsession with completeness would allow nothing less. Eldar by the thousands, entire species of Xenos who were long thought extinct taken in under the aegis of the Krork.

And one golden custodes who's skill impressed even the Krork, who slipped silently away.

I just couldn't resist the idea.

Paging in @Durin
 
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Is not the Krork and Ork situation not eirly similar to ours? Humanities worst opponent are the ruinus powers.

Do the Krork not have the problem that their nameless are "corrupted" by Gork and Mork?
 
At the Fall of the Imperium Dragon's Nest was the Takama Sector, a sector of no particular renown that's only claim to fame was the presence of the Blood Dragons Chapter of Astartes, a chapter known for its honor and the deadliness of its swordsmen. Thanks to a strong sector government the Sector remains strong int he immediate aftermath of the Fall of the Imperium, and thanks to the strength of the Blood Dragon's it was able to defeat all that threatened it. For over a century the Blood Dragon's worked with the Sector Government to defend and govern the sector, until the rise of Sector Governor Gunther von Helervan. Governor Gunther at first proved to be one of the more gifted governors of his line, keeping the sectors economy on good order and its armies strong. However this competence only hid the truth, which was discovered by a brave Blood Dragon's Liberian involved in hunting down a particularly elusive cult on the sector capital. Sector Governor Gunther von Helervan had been corrupted by the Abomination, and had taken most of the Sector Government with him. The Blood Dragon's quickly moved to remove those tainted by the sector governor, which turned out to be most of the upper levels of the sector government. The combination of the lack of suitable replacements for the now former governor and the fear the future governors may prove to be just as susceptible corruption made the Blood Dragon decide to take power for themselves, a feat they accomplished with little issue.

For the following millennia, the Takama Sector, now renamed Dragon's Nest continued to suvive despite everything that the galaxy threw at it.
 
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