Sleight Advantage [Naruto SI] (Old version)
- Thread starter RogueDruid
- Start date
RogueDruid
"You are in my way, And simply unecessary"
- Location
- Salt lake city
I'm glad you see it like that. I was tempted to have it be longer but the flow was weird. This short montage worked put better.This chapter was surprisingly adorable, thanks dude
Thabks, and part of it is specialization. I have short char bios with a quirk for each of the 5 other genin. Like one of them uses a jutte, another is a doton specialists, another is a low level sensor, one is a hot headed teen, and the last is a fairly book worm character, I planned it out, even weighed capabilities. Torus team was just too strong that with a bonus from being the offensive team, they had the initiative.
And the chaos is how these three fight.
Kohaku is one part fire jutsu mid range, one part short range fighter. The reason she didn't do well in the academy taijutsu is she wanted to keep her cards close to her chest.
Yum is physically the strongest of the three. She's got a higher chakra control, and has gotten the shadow bind version of Nara jutsu down pat. It takes her a half second to fire it off, but her prefered range is shorter. She also trusts both of her teammates, opportunistic bastards they are, to capitalize on any opening she makes.
And you know toru, of course. He's taking advantage of his independence sreeak, on Yumi's orders, to split the teams and work as a sniper. A distraction there, a senbon there, giving the other two openings and cover to do their best.
There's also the reason this team is called 'Mind Fuck' later on....
- Location
- USA
- Pronouns
- He/They
Wait, you mean there's isn't a Yamanaka-plus-genjutsu-specialist team already holding the title?
Ino-Shika-Chou was, relatively, famous, and had reputation. They had Names. While they can function as 'normal' specialist, they also function as deterrent and big card on hand.
Tooru team was more like 'normal' specialist, didn't burdened by big name and stuff, so they can operate more discreetly. Also function as Ace-In-A-Hole or card hidden on sleeve. They are cheaters, after all.
- Location
- Leeds
- Location
- Asia
Opportunistic
, this is how I imagine ninjas ought to be. Thanks for the update.
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- Location
- Sweden
Bunshin. I don't know how many times I see people think it's spell Bushin. It's not.
- Location
- Existance
I think the main thing to take from the last few chapters is that you just like being able to have a character called Santa.
RogueDruid
"You are in my way, And simply unecessary"
- Location
- Salt lake city
Not currently. There is an occasional epitaph in a similar vein, but the main person that applies to right now is Actually Ibiki Morino. People don;t fuck with Ibiki Morino. This is him before they stick him behind a desk more than in the cells.
Yeah, 'Team Mindfuck' will be a local Konoha epithet. Among the wider world, they would prefer to have no epithet. they would prefer anonymity.
Kotetsu and Izumo will both show up, particularly later on. right now the chunin shine is just wearing off, they, along with several others, will be more important down the line, occasionally teaming up with Chunin Toru.
Thanks.... don't I feel stupid for that.
yes, as I'll mention often, Toru and the team are meant to be Ninja, Not superheroes.Opportunistic
... I never noticed that. fuck.
High Priestess- 8 (End of Act 2)
RogueDruid
"You are in my way, And simply unecessary"
- Location
- Salt lake city
Here we go, the end of the High priestess arc. now we finally start the true adventures. now we learn, now we go out into the great wide world...
Now we are in danger.
The three of us landed and jogged to the small patio where we started, sliding into the bench with only minor shoving as our sensei sat across from us. At another patio were the other Genin and the three chunin we had encountered. Koetsu was leaning back with eyes closed, Ebisu was leaning against a supporting column for the patio roof, and Izumo was sitting next to Kotetsu and looking interested.
"I must start by saying that you three have exceeded expectations, and while I still plan to push you all over the next little while to see how you work under pressure, you have potential," Santa said with a smile. "But before I go over your performance," he turned to the other Genin. "Thank you, Genin Team 78, for assisting us even though it was unexpected."
"No problem, But we prefer Team Fulcrum."
"You are welcome, Santa-san"
"It was Fun!"
"It was an Honor, Santa Sama"
"Gonna want a rematch soon. This was Fun."
I and the girls also voiced our thanks. "Let's' do this again sometime." "It was an honor learning from you Senpai's" "Thanks for being Op-force Fulcrum"
The Genin nod, before standing and saying goodbye, all wandering off back into town. The chunin also exchange pleasantries before heading out.
When it was just the three of us and sensei, he turned back and we refocused.
"First off, yes, I am taking you all as my team. The level of competence, even if you didn't demonstrate much in the way of firepower, you all clearly know how to work with what you have. Together, you have a disturbing level of synchronicity. I noticed the timing was off occasionally. And that you still were cautious around the others. I know Kohaku has larger more dangerous Jutsu, even if she can't use them often yet. Yumi relied on you noticing her flight to come help, instead of having a signal, and that drained her more than necessary. And Toru though useful, was very careful about using poisoned senbon." he paused and looked us over, "but you all have some great combinations. Toru, using Yumi's actions to select a target and keep her free was great, same with using Kohaku's flames to distract the enemy force so you could hinder them. Yumi, great job coordinating your team and setting up plans, as well as recognizing strengths in the others. Kohaku, using your Jutsu when you did was great, you fought both conservatively and were mindful of your team."
He focused on me, first. "Toru, you need combat experience and practical training to learn how to think even when under fire, you panicked earlier when you all got ambushed, and in a real-life situation that would have been far more costly than it was. I also have a few books for you to read in mind, they should help you learn to limit yourself better and control your chakra, I noticed you have fairly reactive control, so finding ways to manipulate it more smoothly will be important. I have some tests to do with your Shurikenjutsu to see where you lie with that, and I'll need to test your taijutsu to see where you stand. Same with both of you for taijutsu. I have better ideas of the two of you, but I need to see your limits in a prolonged engagement to help you."
He turned to Yumi. "You have fairly good control and reserves, well trained and practiced jutsu, but you have a small repertoire. I know you can do the Academy three and a clan jutsu, but I'll bring you some supplementary jutsu. I'll also start you and Kohaku, with Toru's help, on wall walking and then work with all three of you on water-walking. Beyond that, since you've been selected leader, I'll suggest some books on the protocol in the field. I expect you to work with your team to integrate the information within your group. Beyond that, I have a few exercises for you to run through soon to see where you lay tactically."
Now he turned to Kohaku. "Kohaku-san, I noticed a few things about your fighting style, particularly your jutsu, I'll bring up with you later. But for now, good job. Your Jutsu seem well practiced, and you performed them well, if not perfectly, but you also leave yourself open when you do. I noticed that using them left you out of breath for a moment, and if not for Toru taking advantage, you may have been forced into a close quarters combat you weren't ready for. Beyond that, your physical capabilities are lower than I would like. While you're agile, your speed and strength are slightly sub-par. We'll work on that."
He leaned back and let his eyes rove over us, and I pondered his words, feeling a small part grow focused on the words he said, already running ideas to correct flaws and accentuate skills.
I looked up at him and felt a slight shift in my chakra, the flow speeding up along my spine as my mind spun into action. Regardless of the side track of thoughts, I focused back on sensei.
He looked us over again and nodded.
"Now then, We'll be meeting every day from Monday to Friday as a team, and I'll be instructing you through exercises and practice. On Saturday's we will join together for anything you all want to do, be it practice a specific Jutsu or train in a particular skill. I'll be assisting you, and providing feedback. On Sundays I expect you to try and meet up and hang out, go have fun, try out new things together. If you train, that fine but only light training. Relax together. For the next year, possibly more, you'll be relying on each other. I need you to trust each other, to bond and work as a team. After the first two weeks of this, I'll begin you on D rank missions. Most of these will be fairly mediocre, but will teach you both mundane skills and how to navigate paperwork."
We looked among each other and let his words sink in, before Yumi grinned, looking at me and Kohaku, both of us with smirks and grins of our own. "Well, I think I can speak for my team when I say, Let's get started, Sensei."
Santa-sensei nodded, and his lips quirked.
"Good. First off, let's start you on tree walking. Toru, you're the team expert, so you'll help me out."
I nodded and sensei led us from the pavilion.
I looked at the others, and a line, quoted often, came to mind.
'Welcome to the first day of the rest of your life.'
Now we are in danger.
The three of us landed and jogged to the small patio where we started, sliding into the bench with only minor shoving as our sensei sat across from us. At another patio were the other Genin and the three chunin we had encountered. Koetsu was leaning back with eyes closed, Ebisu was leaning against a supporting column for the patio roof, and Izumo was sitting next to Kotetsu and looking interested.
"I must start by saying that you three have exceeded expectations, and while I still plan to push you all over the next little while to see how you work under pressure, you have potential," Santa said with a smile. "But before I go over your performance," he turned to the other Genin. "Thank you, Genin Team 78, for assisting us even though it was unexpected."
"No problem, But we prefer Team Fulcrum."
"You are welcome, Santa-san"
"It was Fun!"
"It was an Honor, Santa Sama"
"Gonna want a rematch soon. This was Fun."
I and the girls also voiced our thanks. "Let's' do this again sometime." "It was an honor learning from you Senpai's" "Thanks for being Op-force Fulcrum"
The Genin nod, before standing and saying goodbye, all wandering off back into town. The chunin also exchange pleasantries before heading out.
When it was just the three of us and sensei, he turned back and we refocused.
"First off, yes, I am taking you all as my team. The level of competence, even if you didn't demonstrate much in the way of firepower, you all clearly know how to work with what you have. Together, you have a disturbing level of synchronicity. I noticed the timing was off occasionally. And that you still were cautious around the others. I know Kohaku has larger more dangerous Jutsu, even if she can't use them often yet. Yumi relied on you noticing her flight to come help, instead of having a signal, and that drained her more than necessary. And Toru though useful, was very careful about using poisoned senbon." he paused and looked us over, "but you all have some great combinations. Toru, using Yumi's actions to select a target and keep her free was great, same with using Kohaku's flames to distract the enemy force so you could hinder them. Yumi, great job coordinating your team and setting up plans, as well as recognizing strengths in the others. Kohaku, using your Jutsu when you did was great, you fought both conservatively and were mindful of your team."
He focused on me, first. "Toru, you need combat experience and practical training to learn how to think even when under fire, you panicked earlier when you all got ambushed, and in a real-life situation that would have been far more costly than it was. I also have a few books for you to read in mind, they should help you learn to limit yourself better and control your chakra, I noticed you have fairly reactive control, so finding ways to manipulate it more smoothly will be important. I have some tests to do with your Shurikenjutsu to see where you lie with that, and I'll need to test your taijutsu to see where you stand. Same with both of you for taijutsu. I have better ideas of the two of you, but I need to see your limits in a prolonged engagement to help you."
He turned to Yumi. "You have fairly good control and reserves, well trained and practiced jutsu, but you have a small repertoire. I know you can do the Academy three and a clan jutsu, but I'll bring you some supplementary jutsu. I'll also start you and Kohaku, with Toru's help, on wall walking and then work with all three of you on water-walking. Beyond that, since you've been selected leader, I'll suggest some books on the protocol in the field. I expect you to work with your team to integrate the information within your group. Beyond that, I have a few exercises for you to run through soon to see where you lay tactically."
Now he turned to Kohaku. "Kohaku-san, I noticed a few things about your fighting style, particularly your jutsu, I'll bring up with you later. But for now, good job. Your Jutsu seem well practiced, and you performed them well, if not perfectly, but you also leave yourself open when you do. I noticed that using them left you out of breath for a moment, and if not for Toru taking advantage, you may have been forced into a close quarters combat you weren't ready for. Beyond that, your physical capabilities are lower than I would like. While you're agile, your speed and strength are slightly sub-par. We'll work on that."
He leaned back and let his eyes rove over us, and I pondered his words, feeling a small part grow focused on the words he said, already running ideas to correct flaws and accentuate skills.
I looked up at him and felt a slight shift in my chakra, the flow speeding up along my spine as my mind spun into action. Regardless of the side track of thoughts, I focused back on sensei.
He looked us over again and nodded.
"Now then, We'll be meeting every day from Monday to Friday as a team, and I'll be instructing you through exercises and practice. On Saturday's we will join together for anything you all want to do, be it practice a specific Jutsu or train in a particular skill. I'll be assisting you, and providing feedback. On Sundays I expect you to try and meet up and hang out, go have fun, try out new things together. If you train, that fine but only light training. Relax together. For the next year, possibly more, you'll be relying on each other. I need you to trust each other, to bond and work as a team. After the first two weeks of this, I'll begin you on D rank missions. Most of these will be fairly mediocre, but will teach you both mundane skills and how to navigate paperwork."
We looked among each other and let his words sink in, before Yumi grinned, looking at me and Kohaku, both of us with smirks and grins of our own. "Well, I think I can speak for my team when I say, Let's get started, Sensei."
Santa-sensei nodded, and his lips quirked.
"Good. First off, let's start you on tree walking. Toru, you're the team expert, so you'll help me out."
I nodded and sensei led us from the pavilion.
I looked at the others, and a line, quoted often, came to mind.
'Welcome to the first day of the rest of your life.'
bigpianist
alcoholic
- Location
- Gensokyo
JadeKaiser
Uninspired Custom Title
- Location
- Under Your Bed
Someone in one of the Naruto threads mentioned something relevant to that, which it might be a good idea to keep in mind. After seeing sentiments like this, and holding such themselves, they decided to look into the actual legends and stories and such that people have regarding ninja in Japan itself. Turns out, to the Japanese, "ninja" doesn't inspire visions and bring to mind legends of super sneaky shadowy assassins. That side of ninja-ness is mostly a construct of us westerners, apparently. For actual Japanese people, when they think "ninja," they think more "xianxia-style magic warrior who kills whole armies of regular soldiers on their own."
So when we start rolling our eyes at how the ninja in Naruto aren't very ninja-like with their flashy jutsus and magic -sorry, chakra- battles... That's not because Naruto isn't faithful to what ninjas are in Japanese folklore; that's because we westerners don't understand what a ninja is.
Do note that this is second-hand information though, at best. I wouldn't take it as gospel in your position, but it is still something to keep in mind.
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The Fool Reversed (-0-)
RogueDruid
"You are in my way, And simply unecessary"
- Location
- Salt lake city
I looked at the long road before me.
I looked at the Sea, stretching out to the horizon from my spot on the beach.
The sides were an ever-shifting blur, and I saw flashes that made me worried.
The water was placid, the sea calm
In one flickering fragment, I saw a war, eyes of red and purple and white. Hand laced with lightning, clash with a twisting spear.
I heard a whisper, of Kings, of Treasure, of Desire, echoing. I buried it all....
in another, a Shadow larger than I could conceive loomed menacingly.
I listened to the roll of thunder, the march of marines, the yells of the Best
On this road, I saw Death.
on the sea, I saw a Chaos
They greeted me politely and waited, obviously waiting.
It shifted, the unknown, the unseen
I nodded and turned back to my road.
I watched with interest as the first shift in the water happened, a long scaled ridge beaching clear water.
I stood and for a while, I simply watched the road. even now, shifting and turning, and ethereal promise, an uncertain future, a broken sight.
I looked on, seeing strange scales and leather twist through the water.
"would you take this path?"
I turned at the voice, looking at a Mirror behind me, seeing myself.
the words tumbled out of my mouth before I could process my own question, and from behind me, I heard another voice oh so familiar.
I pondered and looked back out at the world.
"No."
The feeling of eyes made me look back again to meet my own gaze.
I looked back into the mirror behind me, seeing me/not me/could be/is.
I pondered my thoughts
He tilted his head.
I shifted, hands finding pockets on jeans.
"Because that's not my path."
I spoke softly looking out at the sea and the feeling of desire swelled in my heart.
I hmmed and looked back at my path.
I could hear his path, one that echoed with familiarity.
I looked at death, and I could tell he knew my choice.
I stepped forward, placing my foot into the water.
I nodded, and stepped forward, as death seemed to suddenly be there, in front of me.
I could feel the water pull at my ankles, dragging me with the tide
They looked down, features indecipherable.
The water rose, and I felt an eagerness.
And then I took my first step down the path.
And then I drowned in the sea.
I vanished, unraveling as I heard a voice...
As my head was dragged beneath the waves, I heard the words, this time in full.
"I'm Going to End the Cycle of Hate!"
"I Buried It all, In One Piece"
I looked at the Sea, stretching out to the horizon from my spot on the beach.
The sides were an ever-shifting blur, and I saw flashes that made me worried.
The water was placid, the sea calm
In one flickering fragment, I saw a war, eyes of red and purple and white. Hand laced with lightning, clash with a twisting spear.
I heard a whisper, of Kings, of Treasure, of Desire, echoing. I buried it all....
in another, a Shadow larger than I could conceive loomed menacingly.
I listened to the roll of thunder, the march of marines, the yells of the Best
On this road, I saw Death.
on the sea, I saw a Chaos
They greeted me politely and waited, obviously waiting.
It shifted, the unknown, the unseen
I nodded and turned back to my road.
I watched with interest as the first shift in the water happened, a long scaled ridge beaching clear water.
I stood and for a while, I simply watched the road. even now, shifting and turning, and ethereal promise, an uncertain future, a broken sight.
I looked on, seeing strange scales and leather twist through the water.
"would you take this path?"
I turned at the voice, looking at a Mirror behind me, seeing myself.
the words tumbled out of my mouth before I could process my own question, and from behind me, I heard another voice oh so familiar.
I pondered and looked back out at the world.
"No."
The feeling of eyes made me look back again to meet my own gaze.
I looked back into the mirror behind me, seeing me/not me/could be/is.
I pondered my thoughts
He tilted his head.
I shifted, hands finding pockets on jeans.
"Because that's not my path."
I spoke softly looking out at the sea and the feeling of desire swelled in my heart.
I hmmed and looked back at my path.
I could hear his path, one that echoed with familiarity.
I looked at death, and I could tell he knew my choice.
I stepped forward, placing my foot into the water.
I nodded, and stepped forward, as death seemed to suddenly be there, in front of me.
I could feel the water pull at my ankles, dragging me with the tide
They looked down, features indecipherable.
The water rose, and I felt an eagerness.
And then I took my first step down the path.
And then I drowned in the sea.
I vanished, unraveling as I heard a voice...
As my head was dragged beneath the waves, I heard the words, this time in full.
"I'm Going to End the Cycle of Hate!"
"I Buried It all, In One Piece"
- Location
- Leeds
And when you woke up you were Naruto?
RogueDruid
"You are in my way, And simply unecessary"
- Location
- Salt lake city
Nope. This moment has been banging around my head for a while, the idea of how Toru made the jump from 'our world' to 'Naruto SI'
This is essentially The moment before the Reincarnation as Toru Shusho began. Its the moment when my character Became My Character. its a dead man staring at a second chance.
its a moment of deciding to roll the dice, to embark into danger, of going forwards.
Or of giving up and letting the tide pull you under.
- Location
- Saipan
Oh...I thought it meant you were going to do another SI, but this time in One Piece.
RogueDruid
"You are in my way, And simply unecessary"
- Location
- Salt lake city
Well.... Who said you're wrong? the only interesting caveat here is, I've not yet read/watched one piece.
orwellianorator
Yoshikage Kira did nothing wrong.
- Location
- Morioh Town
Honestly, I'd love to see an SI that's as clueless about the plot as the other characters.
- Location
- Existance
Which isn't a bad idea in itself, but from a story writing perspective you can't plan anything out at all, and your readers have to wait a long time between chapters because every time you want to write you have to re-familierize yourself with what part of the show you're up to.
It's not impossible, just comes with a bunch of potential problems.
RogueDruid
"You are in my way, And simply unecessary"
- Location
- Salt lake city
See, My idea was to roll some dice and choose an episode from 100-199, and then start my character on whatever island they appear on in that episode, or nearby. From there, I have my character explore as I watch the episode and as I get questions, mark them down. I'll try to avoid canon crashing, since I'll only vaguely even know whats going on, and as I advance the character story, I'll do research on things that happen. It'll be tricky, finding a balance between knowing the characters I'm writing and knowing how little my character knows, but it'd be interesting.
- Location
- Poland
Historically though, from what I know (and I could be wrong here), "ninja" was a profession of spies, infiltrators, propagandists; they might be called to perform assassinations, but that was not their main purpose. They didn't have official uniform. Both samurai and peasant could be ninja.
The idea of ninja as sneaky shadowy martial artists / assassin is much later invention.
nmWarden
Webcomic Glutton
- Location
- Texas
First of all thank you for the terrific chapter and for the peek at the start of everything.
Mwahhahahaa!!! It will certainly be unforgettable! (Don't do it)
I've thought about this too and it is pretty clear that the right way to do it is by making it a group project like Cross-Brain's This Bites! here on Sufficient Velocity. It is of course a One Piece SI. I'm not sure if it is truly my favorite story ever, but (sorry other authors) it is the best written one. If you want a look at it without spoiling too much might I recommend chapter "Omatsuri Island" between 35 and 36?
Mwahhahahaa!!! It will certainly be unforgettable! (Don't do it)
- Location
- Leeds
But then you kind of risk continuity mistakes based on information you've missed or other charectars also making decisions based only on info you have but without stuff they should have.
A better way to do it would be to find someone who knows a lot of one piece and play it out a one on one RPG session.