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Sleight Advantage [Naruto SI] (Old version)

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Any idea what it was you were going to say? I didn't even know you posted a chapter. SV just said you quoted me.
 
More importantly, this is a NINJA village. Weird slang that they've only ever heard from Toru should raise at least a few alarm bells.
 
Depending on how long Toru's been saying things like that, it might just be taken as his personal peculiarity.

Considering that having a private (1 person) shorthand/cipher is much less... less... than something like YOUTH! I doubt it would be that suspicious.
 
Tam Lin said:
More importantly, this is a NINJA village. Weird slang that they've only ever heard from Toru should raise at least a few alarm bells.
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Even in canon, no one raises an eyebrow at "dattebayo" (aside from being annoyed by it), and that's a complete nonsense verbal tic like shouting "shoobydooby!" at the end of English sentences.
 
Roadie said:
Even in canon, no one raises an eyebrow at "dattebayo" (aside from being annoyed by it), and that's a complete nonsense verbal tic like shouting "shoobydooby!" at the end of English sentences.
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Not really. In Japanese it's a combo of three different blunt/emphatic sentence-ending sounds (da, -tteba and yo). They're glued together in a way that only makes sense if you're a young poorly-educated kid who values emphasis over grammar.

Basically, every time Naruto makes this sound, imagine he's talking in a mixture of ALL CAPS and 1337sp34k.
 
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What a great chapter. Not sure what Toru was trying to do at the end there. I'm sad that their planning went to waste. This chapter reminded me more than any previous one of The Eyes Have It (Shana the Shorter) and its sequel. It helps us understand that outside of the protagonists, Naruto doesn't feel like a world of magic. I wish I could bring up something other than Worm and Percy Jackson to compare it to... perhaps Darren Shan's work?


In terms of fanfiction I like this a great deal, but it hasn't matched Daystareld's Pokémon: The Origin of Species yet. We'll see how this story's equivalent of the Zabuza arc turns out. I hope to see more of your love for this setting in the future. The tone and perspective you've crafted is a very satisfying way to write a self-insert story. Thanks for the new chapter!
 
apeljohn said:
Not really. In Japanese it's a combo of three different blunt/emphatic sentence-ending sounds (da, -tteba and yo). They're glued together in a way that only makes sense if you're a young poorly-educated kid who values emphasis over grammar.

Basically, every time Naruto makes this sound, imagine he's talking in a mixture of ClALL CAPS and 1337sp34k.
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Not to mention, the catchphrase seems to be genetic since Kushina also had it.
 
NuclearIcecream said:
Depending on who says it it is either polite or extremely rude. If the winner says it their being an ass. If the loser is saying it its genuine.

GG is appropriate for the winner alone, the "no re" is what makes it rude for the winner.
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I wouldn't say no re regardless of win or lose. One way you are saying they're not worth playing the other you're generally saying something like 'You're an ass. I don't want to play you.'
 
After several months away from this story, I am glad that I finally got back to read it.
Sad thing is, now I have caught up with the current chapter and I have to wait again.
Such a bittersweet moment really.
 
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High Priestess- 6 (Genin Test: Recovery)
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    • *Stands over a freshly buried grave looking at the headstone, which reads 'RogueDruids Muse'.*
    "Get up you lazy bastard. we have work to do."
    *faint muttering from offstage*
    "Really? I have too?"
    *More muttering*
    "Fine." 'clears throat' Hm-Hmmm "

    *Ground shifts, and hand holding a notebook rises from the grave*
    "Thank you."
    I frowned as I wrapped the length of white bandage around the faint bite mark on my arm. The dog had been remarkably gentle, but the jerk to try and get away had been sudden enough for the teeth to scrape away several thin lines of the skin. I look up at the sound of steps as a figure appears nearby, followed by two dogs.

    Sensei!

    And-

    "Toru-San!" I start up and across the square, the Chunin hunter, Hana, was already there from where she had been sitting.

    "Lay him down, I need to run a diagnostics. What happened!" she asked her dogs. Both barked in sequence, and Hana blinked before relaxing minutely.

    "He tried a Kawarimi from what I saw but the Brothers got him just before he could finish it, and sent him skipping down the road. He sat up and talked to me for a second, but when I pulled him to his feet, he got cross eyed and passed out. I took him straight here." Sensei confirmed.

    "Okay, that's better than I feared." her hands lit up with a faint green glow before she slowly ran it over Toru's body.

    "What's happened to him." Sensei's voice was tense, and slightly worried, reminding me of Toru's Information gathering. That's right, Sensei was barely into his twenties, wasn't he?

    "Yeah, like I thought. It's a chakra backlash. That Kawarimi he was going to use? He over charged it, so when he got knocked out of the way, even as it was activating, he got tossed from the Chakra build up. His road burn is nasty and he almost dislocated his arm from what I can tell, but he'll be fine. The real kicker is that he apparently was flooding his system with Chakra without training for it when the adrenaline got flushed out of his system, and he stopped flooding his body with Chakra, it sent him into a crash. Give him a few minutes for the Chakra levels to balance out in his limbs again and he'll be fine, I'll keep an eye on him to make sure he doesn't go into shock."

    Sensei nodded and looked around.

    "I take it that Yumi escaped?"

    "The chunin frowned and nodded. "Yep, the kid here tossed her up to a roof early on and then drew my attention with his smoke screen. By the time I was after her, she had gotten ahead. One of the pups is on her trail right now."'

    "Understood." he turned back to me, and I stiffened instinctively, straightening posture and stance.

    "I have to say, Kohaku-san, you and the others have impressed me greatly. I wanted to test your skill at combat as well, but we may not be able to today. Unless Yumi shows up soon and depending on how Toru-san here feels, I may have you make an attempt on the house. Simple for testing purposes."

    I bowed my head in thanks. "Thank you sensei, I do hope that we get to make an attempt.

    ----

    It was about twenty minutes later when Yumi was dragged back in by the dog, looking annoyed and her hair matted with leaves.

    "Yes Fine, I understand, You found me. No can you let go of my sleeve?" Yumi scowled at the dog, who finally let go and gave a happy 'Woof'

    "Hey, Taichou!"

    Yumi snapped her gaze up at me, and I noticed the trace of a flush along her cheeks. "Kohaku! Where's Toru? Are you both okay?"

    "We're fine Taicho, Toru's passed out from a minor case of chakra crash, but he should be up any time now.

    "I'mmmup." came the mumbled voice from the side of the square near where sensei and the Chunin (Hana?) were sitting.

    Slowly I watched as the slender frame of Toru pushed up into a sitting position, as he rubbed his eyes.

    ""Toru-san!""

    Both me and Yumi jogged his way, and we both came to a rest at his side. "He blinked and tilted his head our way before flinching. "Owhedhuts… fuzzyfuckbulshit." he closed his eyes and began to blindly dig around his out fit, fingers moving through his He finally reached into a pocket and held up a card, focusing his eyes on it before it seemed to flare and turn to ash. A blue glow flowing around his hand, most of it dispersing into the air, while some of it seemed to sink into his hand.

    Suddenly Hana was right there, her hand grasping his wrist and glowing with green medical chakra.

    "What did you just do? Your chakra system just got a surge?"

    Toru shook his head blinking as his eyes finally focused into his usual sharp gaze, as he glanced at Hana. "fed a diffused chakra pulse through my coils to loosen it back up. Better than coffee or tea for a quick pick me up, but it doesn't help with exhaustion."

    Hana looked at him with worry and annoyance. "Moron! Foreign Chakra like that could have caused a coil to burst!"

    "Not really. I generally loosen my tenketsu with acupuncture once or twice a week, making sure to keep my coils and tenketsu loose and responsive. The Chakra was also mine anyway, so there's a lack of Dissonance in the coils."

    Hana blinks, obviously surprised by the measures taken.

    "Where the fuck did you learn this stuff kid?"

    He looked at her and blinks slowly. "Books on Fuinjutsu, chakra control, and being friends with a Hyuga. Do you know the Hyuga clan has made the best most in depth explorations of how chakra system works in the village? It's absurd how much they can help you out if you help them in return."

    He rubbed the back of his head, before pulling his hand back with a card in it, flipping it to reveal the strange geometric symbol that crosses the face. "Storing Chakra is annoying, but I can stash a small amount for when I need it. It's hardly more than you spend on your average Bushin. And when I reclaim it, I barely get 40% of that.

    Hana considered this and looked at him, green glow running along his arm to his chest and head.

    "Alright, you look like you've recovered well enough. Over to you Santa-san."

    Our sensei stepped forwards, crossing his arms. First off, Toru-san, in your opinion what's your condition?"

    "Uhh… maybe seventy percent. My arm is going to be a weak point and my controls a tad unsteady, but I can still move and throw with my off arm just as well. So yeah, about seventy to eighty." Toru replied, flexing and tensing his right arm with a frown, seeing how it ached when twisted certain ways.

    "Kohaku-san? Nara-san? Conditions?"
    "Near 100% here, sensei, I've had twenty minutes to recover and my chakra and exhaustion are back to normal," I spoke up, checking my arm to see the small bite marks had stopped bleeding and was only slightly inflamed.

    "Less than her, about 90%, the chase didn't take much out of me, and I'm still mostly fresh, but dodging the dog took some effort." Yumi supplied.

    "Good, Good." he said, looking over the three of us as Toru picked up his folded jacket, senbon removed, from near he had to lay while passed out and slid it back on.

    "Well, I have made my decision, but I want to see you in one last test."

    I and the others glanced among us, then back at Santa.

    "Complete your third mission."

    Then he, Hana, and the dogs vanished.

    I and Toru turned to see Yumi smirk.

    "Well then. Let's take the castle."

    I felt my lips quirk in response. And Toru grinned, a glint of menace in his eye.
     
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    • RogueDruid said:
    He rubbed the back of his head, before pulling his hand back with a card in it, flipping it to reveal the strange geometric symbol that crosses the face. "Storing Chakra is annoying, but I can stash a small amount for when I need it. It's hardly more than you spend on your average Bushin. And when I reclaim it, I barely get 40% of that.
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    And thats why he pays with cards sometimes, since some ninja can likely charge it with their own chakra. Could be the difference between collapsing and getting back home to safety.

    No doubt some ninja would pay a small fortune for some of those, especially certain ones that are known to have trouble like Kakashi.
     
    Kioras said:
    And thats why he pays with cards sometimes, since some ninja can likely charge it with their own chakra. Could be the difference between collapsing and getting back home to safety.

    No doubt some ninja would pay a small fortune for some of those, especially certain ones that are known to have trouble like Kakashi.
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    Maybe, but not necessarily. He knows this from religiously learning the basic of fuuinjutsu and some experimenting, so the idea and technique maybe not really unknowable by certain rank and higher. What is more plausible is that his skill/ technique has some kind of limitation, and/ or there are better ways to utilize chakra storage, like, say, biological construct/ implants. Or just simply that the technique is kind of impractical, with limited benefit, which is why nobody used it anymore.

    Of course, nobody gonna refuse when some upstart gennin start looking for extra pocket money by selling good products.....
     
    RBomber said:
    Maybe, but not necessarily. He knows this from religiously learning the basic of fuuinjutsu and some experimenting, so the idea and technique maybe not really unknowable by certain rank and higher. What is more plausible is that his skill/ technique has some kind of limitation, and/ or there are better ways to utilize chakra storage, like, say, biological construct/ implants. Or just simply that the technique is kind of impractical, with limited benefit, which is why nobody used it anymore.

    Of course, nobody gonna refuse when some upstart gennin start looking for extra pocket money by selling good products.....
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    Much of this is right. The big point is that the chakra storage right now doesn't scale with the wielder. it seems like it in comparison to Shusho, but for a jonin, or even most Chunin? it's nowhere near to efficient or practical at this stage.
     
    So that's 20.8 bunshin for one 52 deck of cards.
    How much power would a chidori take compared to an efficient bunshin?
    Can you store them in scrolls?
    Then again you should be able to fit a dozen in a decent sized pack.
    That would be 249.6 bunshin. Very useful if you can afford the wieght and space. Then again there's people carrying people sized scrolls around in Naruto. That's allot of chakra for a non-jinjuriki.
    Increasing efficiency should come before capacity though. Even if you can store a Biju worth of chakra in jar like they did shukaku, short of aquiring a biju, it's not much use if 60% gets wasted in the process.

    Still nearly 250 bunshin in something you could stick in a pack... That's pretty good, of you have the time and resources to do so. Nevermind the stratagetic implications. You could store lots of chakra this way during peacetime and then distribute a deck to each Genin on the front lines.
    A single Genin can become as strong as a chunin, but they have to survive first.

    Edit: still not seeing the image.
     
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