AN: Memetic Taylor is easy to write. Ron is pretty straightforward too. Hermione's a bit of a trickier and kept throwing me off, and Harry had me second guessing myself. New characters always seem to take a bit to get a handle on. Also, last time I rewrite Taylor's backstory, didn't even intend to do it again but Hermione just had to ask questions…
Thanks go out to my beta reader @Functionality
POV: Taylor
The Burrow was… something else. Structurally unsound seemed the most accurate description. The land it sat on could be summed up as rural. Not really my first choice of residence, but if the idea was to hide magic from the rest of the world… it made a certain sort of sense.
Mrs. Weasley was… plump, and loud, and judgmental.
She'd lit into Harry and I, but mostly me, when she found out we were married. Been easily deflected when Harry shouted it was Tonk's fault while the woman paused to take a breath. Then after ranting out both the Lupins and getting a bare bones explanation, she rounded on us
again for underage drinking.
The only thing that kept the whole house from descending on us with questions about the shouting was some spell her husband cast to keep the noise confined to the kitchen. After a full day of bullshit I was officially over my limit for nonsense and condescension.
"Enough! Damn it, enough!" I shouted getting right up in the woman's personal space and very pointedly looking down at her from behind my borrowed glasses. "You are not my mother, and while Harry insists you've been good to him, you're not his mother either!"
Molly puffed up and took a breath, but I was having none of it and took another step closer. Surprised, she stumbled back a step.
"I have had a miserable life the past few years and I decided to take one night to just forget, Harry did the same." Being drugged hadn't been my choice, but I
had decided to accept the offered drink for a chance to disconnect from my problems.
"If not for Nymphadora and the bastard that performed the ceremony this would have been one of the most normal teenage things I've ever done! Now I'm neck deep in a war and have a country's worth of strangers judging me without knowing me, and I have a complete stranger
shouting in my face!" I leaned in and shouted the last to really drive the point home.
Mrs. Weasley looked torn between being offended and chagrined as my point hit home.
"If we're not going to be welcome here, I've been told Harry now owns a house which is impossible to find, and one of the most heavily warded in the country.
Do we need to leave?" I stepped back and crossed my arms, but I did not break eye contact.
This wasn't home. I didn't have my costume, or reputation, or even the kind of bugs I'd prefer in significant quantities. But I absolutely drew the line at being bitched out by a busybody housewife
. Especially over things that were actively ruining my life,
and not my fault.
"While that is indeed an option," Dumbledore spoke up from where he had settled at the kitchen table, "I dare say you might regret the choice come meal times. Mrs. Weasley's food is not to be missed, and the pantry at Headquarters is… lacking." That incredibly inane bit of advice given the old man took a bite of cookie and a sip of tea.
"Taylor." Harry spoke up. Turning to look I found the boy grimacing. "I know this wasn't a great first impression, but could you give Mrs. Weasley a chance, please?"
I gave my
husband the most exasperated look I could muster.
"Harry, are you going to go out of your way to defend
everyone that manages to piss me off?" I asked. "Because, believe me, I could hear what they were saying on our way out of the ministry, and it's not going to be a short list."
Harry winced. So did mister Weasley actually.
"I haven't really defended Mrs. Lupin." Ok, point. He'd mostly just wanted me to not attack her. "And it's not like I'm all that impressed with most of wizarding Britain either." Then why was he hell bent on fighting for them? Or was this just standing his ground because the lich would hunt him down if he ran? "But Mrs. Weasley's been really great to me. Most of their family has, except Percy really, but he's just got a thing about authority and government. Please?"
Mrs. Weasley and I eyed one another carefully, and I got the distinct impression this was going to be the age old clash of wife and mother in law. I was not geared for that sort of passive aggressive nonsense. That had always been Emma and Madison's domain. Still, I only had one solid ally here, and he was asking me to try.
Blowing out a breath I nodded.
"In that case," Arthur spoke up, "why don't I show you your rooms? Harry you can have the twins' room, and Taylor you can use Percy's room."
I glanced at Harry but he only gave me an encouraging smile, so I nodded acceptance and shouldered my bag. Hopefully things would be better in the morning.
{}{}{}{} Next Morning
A screech fit to wake the dead had me rolling out of bed blindly fumbling for my knife and calling every bug into the air so I could try and get a full picture of whatever the hell was going on.
I burst into the hallway, knife in hand, swarm building to a crescendo-
"
What do you mean you're married?!" A female voice shrieked from two doors down.
"Oh God damn it! I am not doing this again. Especially not this early!"
Three blurs stuck their heads out of the door to Harry's borrowed room. One brown, and two red.
"Don't scream like that." I growled. "I thought we were under attack!" Without even waiting for a response, I stomped back into my borrowed room to find the knife's sheath and my glasses. I was going to need a proper pair soon. I stepped out into the hallway fully dressed and armed three minutes later, running a hand through my hair. I'd need a shower soon, but first… well first I needed to meet my
husband's friends.
"So," take the initiative, set the tone, every and any advantage is worth taking, "I'm Taylor." Alright never mind, there was absolutely no initiative to be had here. At least I could act confident. That was worth something. Right?
"Hermione Granger." The now less blurry girl about my age with bushy brown hair stuck her hand out almost aggressively. And I shook it doing my absolute best not to look nonplussed at how aggressive she managed to make a handshake.
"Good to meet you. From what Harry's told me you and luck are a good part of what's kept him out of an early grave." Which was true, though there was definitely some serious skill involved as well on Harry's part. Even if he had tried to play that down. I definitely wanted this girl on my side and helping me figure out how best to handle these Death Eaters.
Hermione blinked and glanced back at Harry, before nodding. Though the fact she kept her face so carefully neutral wasn't quite the positive response I'd hoped for.
The red headed girl, Ginny, Harry had mentioned her, gave me a long look before turning and leaving with a huff.
"Er, I'm Ron. That was Ginny. It's… nice to meet you?" The remaining redhead offered hesitantly.
"Same." And now I was running out of things to say. Skitter, warlord of the bay, defeated by awkward conversation with people my own age. "I don't suppose anyone kept their old school books, did they? I've got some idea of what magic can do, but if I'm going to be neck deep in fighting, I want as much information as I can get as a base. After that… Well, Harry was a bit sparse on details. I really need to know how wizards tend to
fight, not just what they can do."
Hermione perked up slightly, but then frowned. "You're talking like you're
not a witch…"
"I'm not. I've got magic," which was interesting, but weird and of obviously limited use, "but most of it is tied up in something unique to me." Just to stay consistent I made a pointless gesture with my hand before a few flies started to buzz in a circle around my head.
Ron stepped back in shock, but Hermione only frowned.
"You plan to fight fully trained wizards and witches with bugs?"
"I'm used to fighting out of my weight class." I waved her concern off. "And no, I'm planning to
kill fully trained witches and wizards with anything I can. Bugs are just one trick up my sleeve."
"That-" the girl began to speak only for Harry to cut her off.
"Hermione, trust me, Taylor might not have told me everything she's been through, but she's serious, and I wouldn't bet against her just yet."
Hermione and Harry
looked at one another. The kind of look that can say volumes. Finally, Hermione nodded and turned to face me.
"You can look through my old text books. I'm sure there are a few copies of the upper year texts somewhere in the house."
"Thank you." I said offering her a small honest smile. Maybe I really could have more allies than Harry.
{}{}{}{} Harry
It had taken no persuasion at all to convince Taylor to come out and do her reading in the shade while we played two versus two quidditch. Mrs. Weasley was being… terse with her, and she leapt on the excuse without hesitating. It was also the only way I'd be able to play with the stupid limit on how far we could get from each other. She seemed fascinated by the brooms for a while, but then settled down and focused on the books she had brought with her, jotting down things in a notebook as she went.
I was less than thrilled when the game came to a stop so the other three could grill me for details where they assumed Taylor wouldn't be able to hear them. I wasn't sure if they were right or not. Taylor had been more than a little vague about her power and how it all worked, but she mentioned being able to hear and see with bugs, if she had enough in place.
We were up in the air so any bugs nearby would be obvious, and I didn't think she'd have enough secreted away in hair or clothes to follow what we were saying, but that was guesswork at best. Empty hope at worst. Even ignoring the chance that she might hear, talking behind her back felt like a betrayal, and she wasn't stupid. Even if she couldn't hear the words, she
would guess the topic.
"Guys really there's nothing wrong… alright that's not true. There is a
lot wrong with this, but none of it is Taylor's fault." I said trying to cut the talk off before it could get started.
"Harry, mate, that bird came out waving a knife when she heard Hermione shriek this morning." Ron said with a carefully patient tone.
I sighed and leaned back letting my broom bob back and forth slightly.
"Taylor is a fighter, probably more so than any of us. She was actually thinking about just… consummating the wedding and vanishing into the crowds in the States. But when we told her about Voldemort, she offered to come help. We're… kind of gambling on who survives the fight?"
"I
beg your pardon?!" Hermione hissed.
"If we both die fighting Death Eaters, then the whole mess won't matter anymore." I said.
Hermione reeled back, Ron and Ginny went wide eyed, and I pushed on before anyone could comment.
"If one of us dies the survivor is free and clear, and if we both live… We can worry about that if we get there." I looked away easily spotting Taylor against the grass. She didn't seem to be paying us any attention, but that really didn't mean much with her. "She's… most people hear about Voldemort dodging death? They kind of give up. She started trying to figure out how he did it, and if we could undo it. I told her about Death Eaters trying to kill me and she just shrugs and says I should return the favor. When we explained how many people he was going to hurt or kill? She volunteered to come here and help."
"Harry, that's not normal." Hermione stated firmly. "What kind of person just up and volunteers to risk their life fighting a mad man for someone they just met?!"
"She's not doing it for
me, Hermione." I shook my head. "This is more like, like my saving people thing." And saying it out loud like that made some of the pieces click into place. "It's a lot like that. But… but not quite. She's… angrier, more focused. I'd rush in to save someone, and I think she would too, but for her… I think ending the threat matters
more."
Me being a target wasn't enough to sway her on its own. Finding out that Voldemort would go after anyone he didn't like? That had lit a fire in her. If it was just about saving people, I don't think we would have left the states with so many weapons, or nearly so much ammunition.
"So, what?" Ron asked. "She's our age and just decides she's going to come fight a war? Mate, that's not
normal."
"None of us are normal." I countered flatly. "We make a yearly habit of running towards danger and getting away in one piece." Well, not Ginny but she had come to the Ministry with us.
That scored a hit with Ron and Ginny judging by the dual flinches, but Hermione only frowned harder.
"Harry, this whole mess is so improbable that it borders on the unbelievable." Hermione insisted. "You go on a surprise trip to America, get drunk, get married, and the girl you get married to is an outcast from magical society who has had their magic twisted in a way that defies our understanding of magic in general! It makes no sense!"
Well, she wasn't wrong. Taylor sort of trusted my judgment about my friends, but she also insisted that the existence of mind reading and truth potions made keeping her origins secret a bit more important.
With a groan I angled my broom down towards Taylor. The others protested, but when I didn't turn back, they quieted down and followed.
Taylor glanced up with narrowed eyes as I got close.
"Harry?"
"Hermione doesn't buy that all of this was random chance, or the explanation about your magic."
"You did say she was clever." Taylor's lips twitched up for a moment as the other landed behind me.
"I did." I answered with a grin.
"Right so, 'I don't trust the stranger around my friend, her story doesn't make sense, something something magic doesn't work that way.' How am I doing so far?"
Hermione frowned outright and nodded firmly.
"I might not know everything about magic, but the ability to control bugs the way you do at the cost of your magic breaks at least one rule of magic as we know it, and I know that witches and wizards can't use the magic of other species. So, there's no way the fae could just hand out a human spell that does something they're infamous for. Then you just happen to stumble across Harry and end up married?" She shook her head. "One of those I could believe, we've seen and done enough crazy things to not dismiss them on their own, but all of them together at once?"
Taylor actually grinned.
"It would have made things simpler if you weren't quite that sharp, but I'm sure I'll appreciate it when it's pointed at someone else. I know I did when… well never mind. Sit down I guess."
Taylor waited patiently until everyone did before continuing.
"I'm not going to tell you everything, I'm going to fudge a few details, but it will be more than just the cover story I'm using."
Hermione frowned then looked at me.
"Honestly the full story is pretty much unbelievable, even by our standards." I scratched the back of my neck. "And it's kind of fun listening to Taylor invent stories on the spot that make sense."
"Harry…." Hermione turned her glare on me but I shook my head.
"Taylor, other than paranoia, do you have a good reason for doing the whole make up a half true story thing right now?" I asked
Taylor actually took a moment to consider that.
"Well, if someone gets it out of them it might keep a few assholes running in circles… and honestly there are enough assholes back home as is. Last thing we need is to import some of your issues, or for the lich to get hold of some of my enemies."
"... Do you really think they could find, er, them?" I asked.
"I know I don't want to take the risk. The Imperious curse you told me about? Depending on who they manage to snag and how well it works? That could be really,
really bad."
"How bad?" Ron asked.
"Living murder blender the size of cow, man that turns into a dragon if he fights long enough, and a girl who can make bombs that turn humans to glass." Taylor described flatly. "Those were some of the worst from home. And there are others as bad or worse."
That… was new information. Merlin, no wonder she didn't want to risk the Death Eaters figuring out portals to her earth. Sure, it sounded impossible, but it wasn't worth the risk.
"Yeah, on that note, Taylor, could you please tell us a story that's missing some of the more important details?" I asked.
No one objected.
"Right, so, I was never a witch, my parents weren't magical either. But I've got an ability." Flies circled her head at a gesture. "And I'm not the only one. Your powers are consistent and learned, ours… aren't. They're all different and mostly instinctive. Thing is, we're
rare. There are enough of us to get the word to anyone new about how things are done, but definitely not enough to get organized or anything like that."
She took a moment to gather her thoughts before continuing.
"We don't exactly mix well with government, magic or not. People see power and decide they want to control it, or study it. Take a guess what our response is?"
"You hide." Hermione answered.
"Mm, to one degree or another. But most people aren't interested in living off the grid. Some of us manage to hold relatively normal jobs, but others? You can make a lot of money if you're willing to treat laws as…
suggestions. And if you're willing to do that it's not such a stretch to start
recruiting, and if all you care about is money and power, well why take no for an answer? Eventually that's just the culture."
Merlin, she could spin a story out of nothing. I was half tempted to believe it, and I already knew the real story!
Hermione's eyes narrowed, again.
"You're a criminal." Hermione accused.
"Most of us are." Taylor shrugged. "If you want to avoid government notice, work with the people who do that as part of their job. As long as we don't draw attention by doing anything inexplicable where people might notice? We're usually good. But that does mean you can end up with competing groups. And one of my enemies had an ace up their sleeve. One minute I was trying to negotiate. The next I woke up strapped to a table."
"I got a uselessly cryptic warning, and a promise I can't trust that my friends were fine, but being relocated. Then I was drugged and dumped in Vegas not far from Harry. Given the things she said, the woman's almost certainly some sort of precog, a sort of seer, but given what Harry has told me, more reliable, and useful. It's entirely possible she intended for this to happen."
"Why? You said you avoid governments. Why put you in a position where all of magical Britain is aware of you?" Hermione demanded.
"Hell if I know." Taylor shrugged. "I've been calling her crazy bitch for a reason, well, multiple reasons. But that's certainly one of them."
"And helping Harry? Why would a
criminal hiding from governments get involved in
our war." Hermione demanded.
Taylor gave Hermione a very unimpressed look.
"There are all kinds of criminals. Since I got sucked into things? I've fought neo Nazis, drug dealers, slavers, and wandering serial killers. My friends and I? My team? We specialized in snatch and grab,
robbery. You would not believe how often we found ourselves fighting against the absolute
worst of humanity. I've got
morals, more flexible than what you're used to maybe, but there are
lines. This lich doesn't seem to care about any of them. I
do not, like that."
As scary as all that sounded, I really hoped that part of this lie was true. We could use all the experience we could get. I really needed to have a long talk with Taylor about the particulars of her history sometime soon.
Taylor took a breath and leaned back.
"Look, I have no way of finding my friends. My other plan? Was to disappear into the criminal underworld of a strange city, where I don't know the players or the powers. And to do that I'd need to sleep with a complete stranger." She gestured to me. "So, when Harry explained how nasty this enemy of yours is, and just how many people could get hurt? It didn't feel right to walk away. It also gives us a buffer between 'nice to meet you,' and the honeymoon."
Hermione winced, and Ginny frowned, but both girls nodded a little hesitantly. Ron hummed before perking up.
"Well, if that's all sorted… can we get back to the game?" Ron said as he stood and headed for the brooms.
"Ron you can't just shrug this off!" Hermione scolded. "The girl is a criminal!"
"Didn't you keep a reporter captive in a jar, then blackmail her?" Taylor asked.
I laughed and caught a glare from Hermione for it.
"What? She has a point. And really? We need all the help we can get, Hermione."
I grabbed Hermione by the shoulder and steered her towards the brooms.
"But Harry-"
"Hermione, please. It's been a long few days. I
really want to spend some time in the air. Taylor is on our side, and to be perfectly fair we broke into the ministry last year. We don't have the best record with laws or rules either."
She kept arguing, but by the time I got her back into the air she'd mostly subsided to grumbling. This definitely wasn't the end of it, but it was a start. Honestly was it too much to ask for my friends to not pick fights with my
very scary criminal wife?
Dumb question. Yes. Yes, that would be asking entirely too much. Maybe Taylor and I should spend some time at Grimmauld place this summer. Give everyone a little breathing room and Taylor a chance to try and get the information she wanted. Might be for the best. Just maybe in a few days after I had some time flying. I really needed a break after that vacation.
AN: For those of you waiting on updates to my other ongoing fics I'm going to tackle Using the Force Made Easy next, then Archer, then back to this in a rotation. Pray for my muse folks Palpatine is mind cancer and writing him is going to be a bitch. Also, my kick ass beta reader @Functionality has suggested I find a second beta reader for this fic because HP is not one of their fandoms and they don't have all the background info. personally given what the fandom has done to HP I'm pretty sure no misstep I might make could even be that bad as opposed to some of the nonsense they've cooked up over the years, but I bow to the beta's advice. If you're interested in an unfortunately intermittent bit of work in exchange for early access uhhhh, let me know? Just... have patience with me. For I am always a bit unsure about starting a new working relationship for my hobby. I've had a range of experiences with this and I'm a bit defensive about my babies.
