I think it's worth remembering that many rpg players suffer from the
geek social fallacies, thus any sort of honest heart-to-heart about how uncomfortable a situation is for them is highly unlikely.
Cool article! I definitely think it can apply to these situations, but don't these all fall under the 'problems both larger than, and unrelated to CBT' category I was talking about earlier? Like, I can see how a combination of fallacies #2 (mostly) and #1 and #3 to a lesser extent could create the kind of atmosphere where you would feel like you couldn't speak up, but how is the problem in such a situation
not the fucked up social dynamics at play?
You... don't believe that someone would be more hesitant to confront their friend about something they're doing that makes them uncomfortable than they would be to talk to appropriate authorities about a random creeper they have no emotional attachment to?
How do you think emotional attachment works?
Uh, dude, how do
you think it works?
Because for me, emotional attachment involves a lowering of barriers and a sharing of more private thoughts and opinions, along with the standard bonding stuff. Part and parcel of that is the ability (and enthusiastic permission, even!) to tell me to stop being a fucknugget if I am, in fact, being a fucknugget.
Is this uncommon where you're from?
I directly addressed the scenario of this system working as intended in the post you quoted, dude; you don't get to pretend it's some Completely Unrelated Topic.
If you're talking about the 'it's emotionally draining to evict a creeper from the group' portion of the post, how is that an issue with CBT. I am very skeptical of the notion that someone who goes out of line in a campaign that has CBT, would not be out of line in a campaign without it. Getting one or two creepers among the applicants to join your group is an unfortunate reality of the fact that sometimes you just meet assholes.
(I feel like I may have strayed a bit from the topic, but I'm going to finish this train of thought)
If you're getting more than the 'standard' allotment of assholes, the problem may be more uh,
structural. Look to your recruitment process.
So yes, maintaining a positive atmosphere and environment for everyone involved can be kind of draining, I guess. Nobody said that healthy relationships were
easy.
Backing up a bit to head off another dodging accusation, let's say that Creeperdude gets added to the group, and creeps someone out, but not in an egregious enough fashion to be kicked from the group immediately. Help me understand your viewpoint, here: If we have the right mix of fallacies #1-3 such that the offended person doesn't feel they can bring their issues up with the group, how is this a problem with CBT and not with the unhealthy social structure at play? Why is Creeperdude (who, having a poor understanding of boundaries, would be stepping on someone's toes no matter what) more problematic with CBT than without? How is the social situation keeping our protagonist from voicing their grievances alleviated if CBT is no longer in the picture?
Honestly, the most compelling (for me) argument against CBT I can think of given what I've read of the arguments from the rest of the thread kind of hinges on something
@Aleph said earlier:
When you can point me to a mechanic that is as emotionally charged for as many people who are likely to actually play the game as total mind control through sex in what can't really avoid coming off as a relationship of complete and absolute manipulative control which one partner enters with the specific intention of making themselves the sole defining value of the other's existence; I will be happy to hear comparisons made.
Now my knee-jerk reaction was to disagree with her 'this is plainly bad' conclusion based on everything I've been saying so far: CBT is one of a
variety of ways available to Solars to be terrible, awful people, and if someone in your group is playing their terrible, awful solar in a way that is squicking you out IRL and you don't feel you can bring it up, that's more indicative of problems in the social situation in your group than anything else.
But there's the issue that sex specifically is a much more problematic topic (however much I think the double standard between violence and sex is stupid, it
exists) than other 'I am a terrible person' options available to a Solar. Given that, I can almost sympathize with an argument somewhat analogous to gun control that says that despite the fact that it's important that Solars are allowed to be awful, the damage caused in the failure state is such that it's worth it to get rid of CBT.
I'm sympathetic to that argument, but it still doesn't quite do it for me.
Apologies if this isn't entirely coherent. It's late, but I wanted to finish this.