- Location
- New York
- Pronouns
- He/Him
[X] No, you'll pack up and head to class right now. You haven't missed a day yet and you're not starting now!
Game of the Year: A Naruto Quest
- Thread starter Vesvius
- Start date
- Location
- South Africa
[X] See if you can get your teachers for approval to work on this instead of reviewing old stuff. Prove you know it already, if you have to!
- Location
- UK
- Pronouns
- They/Them
Always appreciate mentions of Mother, kinda wanna know more of what she's up to when not doting on Daisuke. Also loved the Ino and Daisuke being training dummies for each other parallel.
[X] No, you'll pack up and head to class right now. You haven't missed a day yet and you're not starting now!
Simply because it better fits the image of perfection I want Daisuke to portray. Can't be seen to slack or have such poor time management that we can't train around class!
[X] No, you'll pack up and head to class right now. You haven't missed a day yet and you're not starting now!
Simply because it better fits the image of perfection I want Daisuke to portray. Can't be seen to slack or have such poor time management that we can't train around class!
dragon
Ancalagon the Black
- Location
- The Skies of Arda
We still have a ninjutsu technique coming up.
- Location
- Goose Land
We also need to demonstrate competence in two more Non-Academy Skills.
Ridiculously Average Guy
I'm you, but stronger
- Location
-
Probably a better choice, yeah. Hell, we could get more than one ring for more complex notes, truly playing our sword like a musical instrument.
Thinking on it, if we hope to make the best use of this, we're probably going to need mom to teach us an instrument. Being a courtesan, she has to know at least one (likely ~3).
Shintenshin no Jutsu by DerHesse (canon)
- Location
- Germany
@Vesvius
Maybe someone wants to continue the scene?
"Do you have time after class?"
She kept her gaze on Sensei Iruka, pretending to listen to his lecture about some battle during the Third Shinobi War.
Was that a note of hesitation he just heard?
"Of course, what for?"
"I'll explain later." Now he was intrigued.
---
…and that's why Daddy thinks I'm ready."
He wanted to argue, oh how he wanted to argue, but who was he to deny her.
He couldn't stop the slumped posture. Surely Mother would disapprove "Fine."
At least the impromptu hug felt nice. Maybe too nice, he probably should have let go sooner.
Clearing his throat, "so how is this going to go?"
"Well, you stay here and I take a few steps back and use the Shint.."
"No, that's not what I meant."
They would do this the right way, sitting down he motioned for Ino to join him.
"Listen, I trust you" and here he made sure to emphasize, that he really meant it.
"and I trust your skill." A pause.
"But I want you to walk me through the process…" he raised a hand to forestall Ino's reply.
"I don't want to know how you execute the technique or how the jutsu works or any other clan secret, I just want to know what to expect when I'm on the receiving end."
He gave Ino the time to gather her thoughts and watched her nod once.
"Alright, the activation is fairly simple, I will use my Yin-release to transfer my conscious into your body. It's similar to Gen-jutsu in that regard. Given the complexity however the process isn't instant."
Here she paused, looking him straight in the eyes.
"During the whole duration my body will be vulnerable."
He nodded, she could trust him and she knew that.
"When my mind reaches you I don't want you to panic or fight me on reflex. We will be able to communicate and I can stop it whenever you want me to. Do you understand?"
Another nod, somehow this whole thing felt like a new mile-stone in their friendship.
Kinda nice to prove to each other their utmost trust.
"You will feel like in a dream, experience everything, but your actions will have no effect.
This is the part, which might be a bit disconcerting at the beginning."
Now she gave him the time to gather his thoughts, a last chance to back out even.
No, he wanted to help her reach the next step, he wouldn't disappoint her.
"Alright, let's do this!" He moved to stand up, but Ino kept him sitting.
"Let's stay on the ground, I don't want to fall on my face when my body goes slack."
Sitting cross-legged to each other, both took calming breath and nodded once.
This was it.
"Here we go." And with that she sped through the hand-seals. "Shintenshin no Jutsu"
He watched her head nod forwards, her shoulders slumped and …waited.
Then the curtain dropped and he had a guest in his head.
She kept her gaze on Sensei Iruka, pretending to listen to his lecture about some battle during the Third Shinobi War.
Was that a note of hesitation he just heard?
"Of course, what for?"
"I'll explain later." Now he was intrigued.
---
…and that's why Daddy thinks I'm ready."
He wanted to argue, oh how he wanted to argue, but who was he to deny her.
He couldn't stop the slumped posture. Surely Mother would disapprove "Fine."
At least the impromptu hug felt nice. Maybe too nice, he probably should have let go sooner.
Clearing his throat, "so how is this going to go?"
"Well, you stay here and I take a few steps back and use the Shint.."
"No, that's not what I meant."
They would do this the right way, sitting down he motioned for Ino to join him.
"Listen, I trust you" and here he made sure to emphasize, that he really meant it.
"and I trust your skill." A pause.
"But I want you to walk me through the process…" he raised a hand to forestall Ino's reply.
"I don't want to know how you execute the technique or how the jutsu works or any other clan secret, I just want to know what to expect when I'm on the receiving end."
He gave Ino the time to gather her thoughts and watched her nod once.
"Alright, the activation is fairly simple, I will use my Yin-release to transfer my conscious into your body. It's similar to Gen-jutsu in that regard. Given the complexity however the process isn't instant."
Here she paused, looking him straight in the eyes.
"During the whole duration my body will be vulnerable."
He nodded, she could trust him and she knew that.
"When my mind reaches you I don't want you to panic or fight me on reflex. We will be able to communicate and I can stop it whenever you want me to. Do you understand?"
Another nod, somehow this whole thing felt like a new mile-stone in their friendship.
Kinda nice to prove to each other their utmost trust.
"You will feel like in a dream, experience everything, but your actions will have no effect.
This is the part, which might be a bit disconcerting at the beginning."
Now she gave him the time to gather his thoughts, a last chance to back out even.
No, he wanted to help her reach the next step, he wouldn't disappoint her.
"Alright, let's do this!" He moved to stand up, but Ino kept him sitting.
"Let's stay on the ground, I don't want to fall on my face when my body goes slack."
Sitting cross-legged to each other, both took calming breath and nodded once.
This was it.
"Here we go." And with that she sped through the hand-seals. "Shintenshin no Jutsu"
He watched her head nod forwards, her shoulders slumped and …waited.
Then the curtain dropped and he had a guest in his head.
Maybe someone wants to continue the scene?
- Location
- west
Next life we should copy hei from darker than black and become so good at stealth, throwing knives and wire that even powerful people fear us on reputation alone.
Ridiculously Average Guy
I'm you, but stronger
- Location
-
Doubt it. That's tied to his soul, not mind or body.
dragon
Ancalagon the Black
- Location
- The Skies of Arda
Ninjutsu and genjutsu techniques should count for that.
They don't teach tone of discord in the academy, afterall.
Subtle Revenge by Pittauro (canon)
- Location
- Italy
Ok, Daisuke had been patient, but this goes beyond the line.
He could just BARELY bear the thought of Kiba ogling his mother like that. She allowed him, and Kiba had kept to his word and helped with his research.
What would NOT stand was that he had heard him talking about how she had such a "perfect rack" and how he'd totally "tap that" once he became an ninja amazing enough to "seduce her".
If he wasn't so angry, Daisuke would actually die of laughter at the thought.
He was tempted to simply to trash him, beat him to an inch of his life... but he was not that violent. And Kiba didn't deserve that.
Barely.
Really, it would probably be more satisfactory to give him a taste of his own medicine...
It was the first time Daisuke went to the Inuzuka sector of the village.
He had to admit it was a lot cleaner than he expected.
Differently from how the Uchiha compound was once managed, the Inuzuka's district was mostly open to civilians and not-clan members. While the Inuzuka owned most of the houses some were actually the propriety of civilians and clanless ninja, and the local park was a well known place for people to walk around with their pets.
Sometime the Inuzuka ninken went there on their own, and if they were bored it wasn't that unusual to see them play around and mock fight, which was often an interesting show for those people with too much free time on their hands.
They even played a bit with the children there, And there was always at least one clan member keeping an eye on them, just to be safe.
Still, this was not why Daisuke was here. He was here because Hana lived here.
And also because he knew that right now Kiba was on the other side of the village, making this the perfect moment to talk to her.
Hana was really a beautiful woman. Not as much as his mother of course, but she had a sort of "wild beauty" that really suited her.
"So" Hana asked, just to be sure she got it right "you're saying my little brother has been saying... inappropriate things about your mother, and so you want my help in getting even"
"exactly" Daisuke answers back, making an admirable job of keeping his expression and voice calm while Hana's three large Ninken sniffed him and surrounded him
"and how would you go about it?" Hana asked, an amused smirk on her face.
"oh, nothing too drastic. I know all Inuzuka have an incredible sense of smell, so he'll surely know i was here. What I'd like you to do was to put those flowers" he gestured to the bouquet he had brought her, courtesy of Ino "somewhere visible, and when he comes home and asks why i was here, you act all vague about it, subtly bring his attention to the flowers and have him come to his own completely wrong conclusions. Maybe throw some compliment to me, say something that would make him angry or embarassed. I just want you to keep it up for a couple of days, then you can tell him the truth."
Hana was barely keeping herself from laughing "and why would i do that for you, cutie?"
Daisuke blushed a bit, but kept himself mostly composed while answering "because he deserves it. Because it's an older sister's duty to embarass and tease his brother" he hesitated. It was for a good cause, he told to himself "And because I'll do whatever chore you want me to do for a full afternoon in exchange"
"Deal" Hana immediately replied.
It was a shame, she thought while shaking hands, that he was so young.
If he was just a few years older she knew what use she'd have put him to for that afternoon...
He could just BARELY bear the thought of Kiba ogling his mother like that. She allowed him, and Kiba had kept to his word and helped with his research.
What would NOT stand was that he had heard him talking about how she had such a "perfect rack" and how he'd totally "tap that" once he became an ninja amazing enough to "seduce her".
If he wasn't so angry, Daisuke would actually die of laughter at the thought.
He was tempted to simply to trash him, beat him to an inch of his life... but he was not that violent. And Kiba didn't deserve that.
Barely.
Really, it would probably be more satisfactory to give him a taste of his own medicine...
It was the first time Daisuke went to the Inuzuka sector of the village.
He had to admit it was a lot cleaner than he expected.
Differently from how the Uchiha compound was once managed, the Inuzuka's district was mostly open to civilians and not-clan members. While the Inuzuka owned most of the houses some were actually the propriety of civilians and clanless ninja, and the local park was a well known place for people to walk around with their pets.
Sometime the Inuzuka ninken went there on their own, and if they were bored it wasn't that unusual to see them play around and mock fight, which was often an interesting show for those people with too much free time on their hands.
They even played a bit with the children there, And there was always at least one clan member keeping an eye on them, just to be safe.
Still, this was not why Daisuke was here. He was here because Hana lived here.
And also because he knew that right now Kiba was on the other side of the village, making this the perfect moment to talk to her.
Hana was really a beautiful woman. Not as much as his mother of course, but she had a sort of "wild beauty" that really suited her.
"So" Hana asked, just to be sure she got it right "you're saying my little brother has been saying... inappropriate things about your mother, and so you want my help in getting even"
"exactly" Daisuke answers back, making an admirable job of keeping his expression and voice calm while Hana's three large Ninken sniffed him and surrounded him
"and how would you go about it?" Hana asked, an amused smirk on her face.
"oh, nothing too drastic. I know all Inuzuka have an incredible sense of smell, so he'll surely know i was here. What I'd like you to do was to put those flowers" he gestured to the bouquet he had brought her, courtesy of Ino "somewhere visible, and when he comes home and asks why i was here, you act all vague about it, subtly bring his attention to the flowers and have him come to his own completely wrong conclusions. Maybe throw some compliment to me, say something that would make him angry or embarassed. I just want you to keep it up for a couple of days, then you can tell him the truth."
Hana was barely keeping herself from laughing "and why would i do that for you, cutie?"
Daisuke blushed a bit, but kept himself mostly composed while answering "because he deserves it. Because it's an older sister's duty to embarass and tease his brother" he hesitated. It was for a good cause, he told to himself "And because I'll do whatever chore you want me to do for a full afternoon in exchange"
"Deal" Hana immediately replied.
It was a shame, she thought while shaking hands, that he was so young.
If he was just a few years older she knew what use she'd have put him to for that afternoon...
I'm not completely satisfied, but here it is
@Vesvius
- Location
- Germany
Tree-walking is in the pipeline and when push comes to shove Water-walking is not a giant leap forward.
Maybe hide the technique as an elaborate and personal drawing ritual given that there's no point in doing it when we want to do a surprise attack with the sound involved.
- Location
- west
We could put a softer metal in the scabbard so we could use the scraping sound to cast.
- Location
- Germany
But then we would always have the scraping sound, which isn't usually desirable.
Daisuke's Secret Project? One Bleach Z! by Kkutlord
Kkutlord
Prince of Breath
- Location
- Indianapolis, Indiana
Because I've gotten enamored with it, here's an omake of Daisuke trying to develop "One Bleach Z" from the Daisuke Dreams About Swords canonical omake.
Basically, I wanted to see Daisuke try writing a story, so the omake isn't too unrelated. Mainly though, I just really wanted someone to expand on it at least a little, which is why I even tried.
It began as a typical morning for Ichiku G Luffy- decking his grandpa in the face in response to his attempt at shinobi training, promising to hang out with his little sister Karima, and then heading out to his training spot.
Unfortunately, today fireballs decided to rain down from the sky. Looking around in shock and surprise trying to find the source, Ichiku's attention is grabbed as he hears a shill feminine cry.
For a second, he didn't understand why the little girl screamed- then he noticed the fireball heading right for her. She had almost-black blue hair like his sister, and before he knew it Ichiku rushed to push her out of the way.
That was when his world became fire, and as the darkness encroached Ichiku wordlessly apologized for breaking his promise to Karima- then, unconsciousness.
----
Groggily waking up, Ichiku felt... oddly okay after getting hit by a fireball. "Oh, maybe I'm still dreaming? Guess that makes sense." Standing up and stretching out his back, the young man stopped as he noticed.
All around him, buildings had been damaged and the ground impacted. There were even people gathered around some burnt up... thing? Might as well go ask them.
"Hey, what that thing suppose to be? I'm kind of surprised nobody got burned." Nothing, no looks his way, no reaction to his words. Uh... okay, maybe it was someone? Still, kind of rude not to explain.
"Wasn't this Luffy-sensei's boy?" "Yeah, poor boy sacrificed himself to save my granddaughter." … "Wait, what? T-that's suppose to be you? N-no way, you're standing here just-"
Freezing, Ichiku notices a ship right outside the village entrance. That makes no sense, how did that get there!? It certainly wasn't there when the fireballs were raining, and how could a ship even make it on land!?
Then, from above, a large mass leaps down- and Ichiku could see an annoyed look on their face. Then, the figure spots Ichiku, and smirks. "Well well, it seems my crew did hit someone after all."
H-huh? Looking around dumbly, Ichiku finally points at himself and calls out. "Are, are you meaning me?" The giant bellows loudly, yet still no one is paying attention. Come on, they can't be that be dumb!
Focusing on the giant as they approach, Ichiku begins to realize their skin looks bone-white. Then, as they swing forth a massive club from nowhere, the figure bellows once more.
"Now come boy, either pledge allegiance or be absorbed! I don't have all day!" … On the one hand, Ichiku really didn't know what to do. Was he really dead? What if this was just a dream?
Yet, Ichiku kind of wanted to fight. Mean, look at that dude! Ten feet fall, probably weighs a ton or five, even having a massive club! Fighting them would be amazing training!
Then, the giant snarls, and slams the club into the ground. "Don't just stand there gawking! I'll start killing others if you do!" That causes Ichiku to freeze, and properly process things.
Dream or not, he knew fireballs rained down and that when he woke up this person claimed responsibility. Who just threatened to kills others like they did him if he kept doing nothing...
Fists clenching, Ichiku points at the giant and calls out firmly "You won't hurt anyone else, you giant ugly brute!" That causes the giant to look utterly incensed, and yells with their booming voice.
"Can't you tell I'm a beautiful and slim woman!? You idiot men are always trying to insult me!" … Eh? Like, really? That is, uh... huh. Then, the giant charges at Ichiku, club swinging ready to hit.
Jumping backwards to dodge, the club sends up a dust cloud on impact- and the noise draws people's attention, yet no one is leaving. How can they not see the rampaging giantess!?
Noticing the giantess in question having trouble pulling her club free, Ichiku rushes in and punches- only for the giantess to look down and smile madly. Then, with a surprisingly fast fist of her own, Ichiku is sent flying into a nearby building.
Pulling himself up from the shattered counter that politely became a bed of rubble, Ichiku frowned. "She's... way stronger than anyone I've ever fought. What am I suppose to do!? Karima and Gramps are in danger!"
Looking out to see the giantess glance over at the people surrounding his, his body, something inside Ichiku snaps as he sees the giantess line up her club to hit them.
Then, Ichiku bursts forward with incredible speed, and smashes his fist against the giantess' face- and she suddenly barrels over from the force, look of utter bafflement on her face. Then, as she glances at Ichiku, her tone becomes oddly quiet- in comparison to before, anyways.
"You, you have Super Devil Ki? H-how does such a worthless town have someone like you!" Huh? Looking at his hands, Ichiku flinches as he sees golden-yellowish fur covering them...
And running up his arms, framing his face, even covering his legs. Oh, and apparently there's a tail now? Looking at the giantess, Ichiku just had to know. "What is Super Devil Ki!? What's going on!?"
The giantess, however, just snarls as she stands back up. "Don't play games with me, you already have one of the 7 Soul Keys don't you!? Ha, hahaha! Perfect, perfect! One step closer to entering the Soul Society! Whatever your wish is, it doesn't matter boy! Your Soul Key is mine!"
That is so unhelpful! Getting into a defensive pose, Ichiku could feel his arms... coil? Thinking about it... his legs did feel weird when he jumped. Maybe, he could do something similar with his arms?
Leaping high into the air as he dodges the giantess' charge, Ichiku tries to restrain his surprise. Yet, he's definitely faster and more agile now... twisting in mid-air without even meaning to, Ichiku lands behind the giantess.
Seeing her look around in confusion, Ichiku 'coiled' his right arm as he pulled back. He just hoped this would work... running low, Ichiku unleashed an uppercut to her chin.
Seeing her head pull back by the force, Ichiku notices a glow of some kind surrounding his arm- and suddenly the giantess is flying as his right arm extends by five feet.
Watching the giantess crash into her ship, Ichiku could hear faint panic before it- takes to the sky!? Just what is going on, and why is his five feet long!?
----
"Uh... Daisuke, what is this?" Looking at Ino as she reads the notebook, you take a few seconds to consider your response. You didn't think she'd have that much trouble deciphering your experimental Genjutsu notes.
"Like I said, I'm working on a brand new Genjutsu, it should be expla-" Twisting the open notebook at you, Ino responds slowly. "So... how exactly were you planning to make someone think they're Ichiku?"
T-that wasn't the, you were, gah. Valiantly preventing yourself from blushing in embarrassment, and composing yourself, it is a simple matter to explain.
"Sorry about that, that's unrelated, just something I was working on during breaks." Watching Ino as she looks over the notebook again, she 'hmms', before turning back to you.
"Well, it has some potential, but it really needs to be fleshed out. Maybe pair it with drawings? It isn't really clear what Ichiku or the giantess are suppose to look like, just vague descriptions."
Is, is Ino critiquing your work? "Then there's Super Devil Ki and those 7 Soul Keys, which sound like they're for accessing that Soul Society place? You definitely need more detail there, like is Ichiku doing something normal for Super Devil Ki wielders or is it unique per person?"
She's definitely critiquing your story. "Overall you should spend more time fleshing out Ichiku, so we know why his family is so important. Because I'm getting the impression that's why Ichiku suddenly developed Super Devil Ki, right?"
Okay, huh... "Yeah, currently the reason anyways. To be honest I've been toying with this story for a while, more so after the theater performance. I only really started working on it when I hit a stumbling block regarding the research I've been doing. See, there's a page torn."
Ino's face lights up as she notices the clean removal, and sets the notebook down. Yet, she looks like she still wants to comment on it, if her thoughtful expression is anything to go by.
"I think you should introduce a female character as Ichiku's ally, maybe someone more knowledgeable and skilled? You're definitely going to need a reason he gets things explained to him."
Huh... you had been trying to remember who the, love interest? Who the first-important-good-female character was suppose to be. Initially it seemed like Karima, but-
No, wait, you're getting distracted. You got a Genjutsu to experiment with, you can talk shop with Ino later! You just hope she doesn't share it, One Bleach Z is nowhere near finalized. Still, maybe Jabari could help plan out the fight scenes...
Unfortunately, today fireballs decided to rain down from the sky. Looking around in shock and surprise trying to find the source, Ichiku's attention is grabbed as he hears a shill feminine cry.
For a second, he didn't understand why the little girl screamed- then he noticed the fireball heading right for her. She had almost-black blue hair like his sister, and before he knew it Ichiku rushed to push her out of the way.
That was when his world became fire, and as the darkness encroached Ichiku wordlessly apologized for breaking his promise to Karima- then, unconsciousness.
----
Groggily waking up, Ichiku felt... oddly okay after getting hit by a fireball. "Oh, maybe I'm still dreaming? Guess that makes sense." Standing up and stretching out his back, the young man stopped as he noticed.
All around him, buildings had been damaged and the ground impacted. There were even people gathered around some burnt up... thing? Might as well go ask them.
"Hey, what that thing suppose to be? I'm kind of surprised nobody got burned." Nothing, no looks his way, no reaction to his words. Uh... okay, maybe it was someone? Still, kind of rude not to explain.
"Wasn't this Luffy-sensei's boy?" "Yeah, poor boy sacrificed himself to save my granddaughter." … "Wait, what? T-that's suppose to be you? N-no way, you're standing here just-"
Freezing, Ichiku notices a ship right outside the village entrance. That makes no sense, how did that get there!? It certainly wasn't there when the fireballs were raining, and how could a ship even make it on land!?
Then, from above, a large mass leaps down- and Ichiku could see an annoyed look on their face. Then, the figure spots Ichiku, and smirks. "Well well, it seems my crew did hit someone after all."
H-huh? Looking around dumbly, Ichiku finally points at himself and calls out. "Are, are you meaning me?" The giant bellows loudly, yet still no one is paying attention. Come on, they can't be that be dumb!
Focusing on the giant as they approach, Ichiku begins to realize their skin looks bone-white. Then, as they swing forth a massive club from nowhere, the figure bellows once more.
"Now come boy, either pledge allegiance or be absorbed! I don't have all day!" … On the one hand, Ichiku really didn't know what to do. Was he really dead? What if this was just a dream?
Yet, Ichiku kind of wanted to fight. Mean, look at that dude! Ten feet fall, probably weighs a ton or five, even having a massive club! Fighting them would be amazing training!
Then, the giant snarls, and slams the club into the ground. "Don't just stand there gawking! I'll start killing others if you do!" That causes Ichiku to freeze, and properly process things.
Dream or not, he knew fireballs rained down and that when he woke up this person claimed responsibility. Who just threatened to kills others like they did him if he kept doing nothing...
Fists clenching, Ichiku points at the giant and calls out firmly "You won't hurt anyone else, you giant ugly brute!" That causes the giant to look utterly incensed, and yells with their booming voice.
"Can't you tell I'm a beautiful and slim woman!? You idiot men are always trying to insult me!" … Eh? Like, really? That is, uh... huh. Then, the giant charges at Ichiku, club swinging ready to hit.
Jumping backwards to dodge, the club sends up a dust cloud on impact- and the noise draws people's attention, yet no one is leaving. How can they not see the rampaging giantess!?
Noticing the giantess in question having trouble pulling her club free, Ichiku rushes in and punches- only for the giantess to look down and smile madly. Then, with a surprisingly fast fist of her own, Ichiku is sent flying into a nearby building.
Pulling himself up from the shattered counter that politely became a bed of rubble, Ichiku frowned. "She's... way stronger than anyone I've ever fought. What am I suppose to do!? Karima and Gramps are in danger!"
Looking out to see the giantess glance over at the people surrounding his, his body, something inside Ichiku snaps as he sees the giantess line up her club to hit them.
Then, Ichiku bursts forward with incredible speed, and smashes his fist against the giantess' face- and she suddenly barrels over from the force, look of utter bafflement on her face. Then, as she glances at Ichiku, her tone becomes oddly quiet- in comparison to before, anyways.
"You, you have Super Devil Ki? H-how does such a worthless town have someone like you!" Huh? Looking at his hands, Ichiku flinches as he sees golden-yellowish fur covering them...
And running up his arms, framing his face, even covering his legs. Oh, and apparently there's a tail now? Looking at the giantess, Ichiku just had to know. "What is Super Devil Ki!? What's going on!?"
The giantess, however, just snarls as she stands back up. "Don't play games with me, you already have one of the 7 Soul Keys don't you!? Ha, hahaha! Perfect, perfect! One step closer to entering the Soul Society! Whatever your wish is, it doesn't matter boy! Your Soul Key is mine!"
That is so unhelpful! Getting into a defensive pose, Ichiku could feel his arms... coil? Thinking about it... his legs did feel weird when he jumped. Maybe, he could do something similar with his arms?
Leaping high into the air as he dodges the giantess' charge, Ichiku tries to restrain his surprise. Yet, he's definitely faster and more agile now... twisting in mid-air without even meaning to, Ichiku lands behind the giantess.
Seeing her look around in confusion, Ichiku 'coiled' his right arm as he pulled back. He just hoped this would work... running low, Ichiku unleashed an uppercut to her chin.
Seeing her head pull back by the force, Ichiku notices a glow of some kind surrounding his arm- and suddenly the giantess is flying as his right arm extends by five feet.
Watching the giantess crash into her ship, Ichiku could hear faint panic before it- takes to the sky!? Just what is going on, and why is his five feet long!?
----
"Uh... Daisuke, what is this?" Looking at Ino as she reads the notebook, you take a few seconds to consider your response. You didn't think she'd have that much trouble deciphering your experimental Genjutsu notes.
"Like I said, I'm working on a brand new Genjutsu, it should be expla-" Twisting the open notebook at you, Ino responds slowly. "So... how exactly were you planning to make someone think they're Ichiku?"
T-that wasn't the, you were, gah. Valiantly preventing yourself from blushing in embarrassment, and composing yourself, it is a simple matter to explain.
"Sorry about that, that's unrelated, just something I was working on during breaks." Watching Ino as she looks over the notebook again, she 'hmms', before turning back to you.
"Well, it has some potential, but it really needs to be fleshed out. Maybe pair it with drawings? It isn't really clear what Ichiku or the giantess are suppose to look like, just vague descriptions."
Is, is Ino critiquing your work? "Then there's Super Devil Ki and those 7 Soul Keys, which sound like they're for accessing that Soul Society place? You definitely need more detail there, like is Ichiku doing something normal for Super Devil Ki wielders or is it unique per person?"
She's definitely critiquing your story. "Overall you should spend more time fleshing out Ichiku, so we know why his family is so important. Because I'm getting the impression that's why Ichiku suddenly developed Super Devil Ki, right?"
Okay, huh... "Yeah, currently the reason anyways. To be honest I've been toying with this story for a while, more so after the theater performance. I only really started working on it when I hit a stumbling block regarding the research I've been doing. See, there's a page torn."
Ino's face lights up as she notices the clean removal, and sets the notebook down. Yet, she looks like she still wants to comment on it, if her thoughtful expression is anything to go by.
"I think you should introduce a female character as Ichiku's ally, maybe someone more knowledgeable and skilled? You're definitely going to need a reason he gets things explained to him."
Huh... you had been trying to remember who the, love interest? Who the first-important-good-female character was suppose to be. Initially it seemed like Karima, but-
No, wait, you're getting distracted. You got a Genjutsu to experiment with, you can talk shop with Ino later! You just hope she doesn't share it, One Bleach Z is nowhere near finalized. Still, maybe Jabari could help plan out the fight scenes...
Basically, I wanted to see Daisuke try writing a story, so the omake isn't too unrelated. Mainly though, I just really wanted someone to expand on it at least a little, which is why I even tried.
Joyful_Fabo
Happy Owl; Hoot-Hoot
- Location
- His Joyful Nest
- Pronouns
- He/Him/El
[X] See if you can get your teachers for approval to work on this instead of reviewing old stuff. Prove you know it already, if you have to!
- Location
- west
It could be made removable just make it take a pin and it comes off in halves connected by a hinge.
- Location
- Germany
This will never fly with any teacher. It's disrespecting towards the other students that might need the revision, it's arrogant to practically say that you don't need their teaching and at what point would the teacher draw the line with the other students?
It's not as elegant as a beautiful ringing sound?
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- Location
- Boston
[X] No, you'll pack up and head to class right now. You haven't missed a day yet and you're not starting now!
actually knight in vested 20 exp in ToD a while back and that hasn't gone through so 150 exp to discord and someone else already wrote an omake and promised it's exp to ToD too.
as for henge your right, but we'll likely be getting IC exp for it.
- Location
- west
Maybe not, but it would be just about as fast and inconspicuous as you could cast a sound based genjutsu while drawing a sword. Most people would probably think it was just because we that it was cool.