Kuro: Yeah, she's kinda of a cinnamon roll, isn't she?

Kana: Wait, who are you?

Kuro: I'm Kuro, Illya's twin sister.

Ritsuka: Wait, dad never said Illya had a sister.

Kuro: Well, after our parents won the Grail War, they wanted Illya to have a normal childhood, so they tried to reset her to be a normal human. They messed up through, and they ended up just sealing her magus half. Took me like a decade to get my own body!
Kuro: Sis is being whiny about it. 'Kuro stop using magic to mess with people' 'Kuro, stop ambushing people to steal their mana' 'Kuro, stop trying to seduce Onii-chan, I'm trying to repress our pseudo-incestuous desires.' Anyways, who are you guys? And who is that dad of yours that mentioned us?:)

Ritsuka: :o
Kana: *"This-is-just-like-my-animes" intensifies*
You're image seems broken.
 
And now I had the image of Gil pulling a Vegeta and complaining about bargain sales of kings. I'm not sure he would though but it was an amusing image.

But it would certainly be an interesting event with many chances for explosions... and this just reminded me of Nobu.
.....I just had the strangest mental image of Ritsuka suplexing 4th War Gil.

It's.... beautiful.

Fixed, but I have no idea what they're saying.
Illya: "Onii-chan's turned into a girl, whyyyyyyyy...?!"
Ritsuka: "I... think you have the wrong person...?"
Chloe: "Whether a boy or a girl, Onii-chan is Onii-chan, you know~? Plus now we can takes baths together! And sleep together! And no one can complain!
Ilya (mentally): CHLOE, YOU--!
 
Illya: "Onii-chan's turned into a girl, whyyyyyyyy...?!"
Ritsuka: "I... think you have the wrong person...?"
Chloe: "Whether a boy or a girl, Onii-chan is Onii-chan, you know~? Plus now we can takes baths together! And sleep together! And no one can complain!
Ilya (mentally): CHLOE, YOU--!
Heracles: *grunt*
Illya & Chloe: *screaming in terror*
Heracles: *gave Illya headpats and make a gesture on Chloe*
Illya: *too unsconsious to care*
Chloe: *nodding vigorously*
 
Illya: "Onii-chan's turned into a girl, whyyyyyyyy...?!"
Ritsuka: "I... think you have the wrong person...?"
Chloe: "Whether a boy or a girl, Onii-chan is Onii-chan, you know~? Plus now we can takes baths together! And sleep together! And no one can complain!
Ilya (mentally): CHLOE, YOU--!
Illya: Wait, when did Tohsaka-san turn into a boy?
Kuro: It's probably some weird magic spell that's part of a plan to sleep with Onii-chan.
Ritsuka: WHY DO PEOPLE KEEP ASSUMING I WANT TO SLEEP WITH MY SISTER?!?
 
Chapter France - Pt. 8
In the burning heart of Orleans, the Saint stands alone amidst a mound of dead monsters.

Her fallen twin is gone. One of her allies has been abducted. And the one they left behind is being consumed by Carmilla's curse. Orleans still burns. Wyverns still fill the skies and stalk the land in harrowing quantities, and with scales like shields and fangs like swords no mere man or woman can stop them - and their attention is too split between flame and fear to coordinate.

Lancer is busy, preoccupied with a lance of wyverns and The Count of Wallachia himself. Caster is nowhere to be seen, and though she rejects the possibility of betrayal in her heart she cannot trust in her help. Shielder is busy protecting Kana, and is pinned by Atalanta's assault.

At least she has Marie, she thinks, the very instant the Queen of France arrives atop a stallion of light and crystal. She grunts in exertion as she flings a brace of gemstones at the burning buildings around her, and each fire dies in explosion after explosion. "Jeanne!" The Rider calls to her immediately, hurried and anxious but no less elegant. "Master is in danger, you have to save her! Carmilla--"

"I know," Jeanne replies evenly, "I saw her take Ritsuka away." She joins Marie upon her steed, one hand upon Marie's shoulder and the other holding her banner high. "Quickly, Marie! Time is short."

"Oui, Jeanne! I know a shortcut!"

----

When she embarked upon the Grand Order, Mashu knew that danger and battle awaited her. She welcomed the responsibility, happy to do her part in the fight for humanity. Protecting her Masters - who are also her friends - was the least she could do after she won a second chance at life.

But getting pinned down by a very capable Archer in a tiny room is not what she was expecting. Already bleeding from a hundred shallow gashes, with arrows clanging off her shield and armor at least thrice each second, even she's surprised how long she has managed.

But it won't be forever. She knows it. She isn't strong enough to last, and she can't fight back so eventually her Master will get shot in the head.

Assuming Kana doesn't turn into a vampire-thrall before then and rip her spine out with her teeth. But that's not important right now.

She won't even last that long.

"Fu-fucking… goddammit…" Behind her, on the ground, Kana groans and claws at her face with cold, shaking fingers. "O-Of course they were in the city… We knew she was… dammit…"

"Kana-senpai, stay down!" Another brace of arrows glances off the center of her shield, blocked just in time from above. Two more lance off the walls and cut into already-bleeding shoulders. Mashu pays them no mind. "You need to rest, so don't worry about it now!"

She looks over her shoulder for a second, and wishes she had not. Kana looks like a mess. Her veins are popping, stark blue against nearly-translucent skin. Her eyes are red, and she's trembling badly. She looks like she's in agony, still hurting from the bite wound on her neck. But she's too weak to even clutch it. "I-Is Rits…" She coughs, wet and heavy. "S-She took him, d-didn't she…"

Mashu nods, and bites down tears. "Yes, she did. But it's fine! We'll get him back!"

"No… I-It's better… A-At least he'll keep fighting…" Kana smiles, despite her condition, even though it looks like it hurts. "S-Still… sorry you're stuck with me… eh?"

An arrow punches through the wall next to her like it was nothing, less than an inch from her cheek, and Mashu has to duck to avoid the next four that nearly smash through her head. "Lancer! Caster! Rider! She's getting worse!"

"I-If I turn, kill me… I don't wanna be a thot…"

"She's speaking in tongues now!"

Caster says nothing. She's been silent this entire time. Lancer, as usual, replies with an awkward chuckle. 'Sorry, Shielder. Still kind of--'

The wall explodes. At first, Mashu thought that Archer finally unleashed her Noble Phantasm. But she sees blue and red, not green.

Cu Chulainn crashes through the wall and off the ground, denting it severely but not falling through it, and gets on his feet by punching the ground. He looks like hell, his hair loose and wild and sticky with blood, his left arm gone above the elbow, several massive chunks blown out of his body… Chunks large enough to reach through to his back. It's a miracle that he's still alive, but it would take at least this much to kill him.

Lancer spits Gae Bolg out of his mouth and into his only remaining hand, and tilts his head apologetically at Mashu for all the blood he's sloshing - not dripping, that's not enough - onto the ground. 'Kind of busy,' he continues, still on their link. Mashu sees why; his throat is a mess. 'Stay right here, I almost have this guy!'

A wyvern's screaming head slams through the hole in the wall, snapping at Cu with fangs as long as Mashu's forearm, but the Hero does not flinch. He stabs it in the eye instead, nearly half the spear deep, and lunges back out of the inn with the corpse in hand. Only the honed instincts of her savior keep Mashu alert, and help break her stupor and raise her shield before another arrow can rip her brain out through her ears.

"That…" Kana remarks, "Was awesome…"

"Probably!" Mashu shouts back, "But I'm still under attack! Marie, if you're there please answer me!"

'Oh! I'm so sorry, I didn't realise I was muted!'

It is only Mashu's gentle nature that helps her shock and relief override her irritation. "Marie! You're still here!"

'Yes! And I'm almost here!'

A crystal pony leaps into the room immediately after, shielding them from a dozen arrows that bounce off its shining flesh. The Saint hops off the horse immediately, casually slapping an arrow aside with the head of her spear, and with calm urgency places a hand over Kana's forehead. When she withdraws it a second later, it is dripping with sweat.

"I'm just in time," Jeanne D'Arc says in relief. "Hold my banner, Mashu, I need two hands."

She does so, and the Saint gets to work. One on Kana's head and the other against her breast, bright light shines from her hands as she chants, beseeching God's blessing upon her Master. Her work is done in minutes, and Kana already looks better. Her veins are no longer so stark.

"Thank you, Jeanne, for--" Mashu starts to thank her, but then the wall explodes as dozens of stakes crash through the wall. Mashu bats them aside with her shield, but leaves a gap in the process.

Vlad Tepes, the Impaler, crashes through the still-tumbling debris, his face grim and his spear aimed at Jeanne's face. The Maid looks back with indifference.

He stops short, half his spearhead's length from her face. Through the center of his chest is a red spear, dripping with blood.

Vlad chuckles darkly and shakes his head. "Your speed is incredible, Lancer."

Behind him, Cu scoff-gurgles. He doesn't manage to make words, but the message is clear enough.

Vlad nods, to his opponent's unsaid retort. "Unfortunately, Lancer, speed isn't everything. You missed." Before the Child of Light can correct his mistake, Dracula melts into a mass of bats and flees.

"...Oh," Mashu frowns. "Right, he's a vampire. They do that."

"Vampires are very strange," Jeanne grumbles. "Thank you, Lancer, for saving my life."

Cu shrugs. He turns to pursue him, still bleeding profusely, but Jeanne grabs him by the shoulder. "Wait," she adds, and whispers a small prayer. Light spreads from her hand over his body, seeping into his wounds and stemming the bleeding. While his injuries are still gruesome, most importantly he's still only got one arm, Mashu can no longer see the building across the street through him now. "I can only do so much, but this should help."

Cu nods wordlessly at her, his throat still mangled, and he quietly gives chase. Jeanne and Mashu share a collective sigh of relief, finally winning a moment's respite.

"Wait," Mashu says suddenly, and she holds her shield up. "Archer is still out there! She's going to--"

"I got it," Marie says nonchalantly. "I created a barrier, of sorts. It should give us a moment! You're welcome~"

"Oh! Thank you, Ma...rie…" Still frowning, Mashu turns to her mount. "Marie, is that a crystal pony?"

"Yes! Yes it is. Well, technically a horse, but she is crystal nonetheless!"

On the ground, Kana groans and rolls over until she is face-down on the ground.

"Well I think she's quite beautiful," Marie says defensively.

Jeanne shakes her head. "Nevermind that, we must focus. Orleans is still under attack, and Kana's condition is still critical. I caught her on the borderline, but her will will be tested. We must prepare - and killing you is not an option," she adds, before Kana can suggest it. "Shielder, you are to continue protecting her. Marie, you are to roam Orleans and fight fire and monster alike. I will organise the defense. In the morning, we will--"

Outside, through the hole in the wall, light shines down into the room.

"--discuss the assault on Paris huh." Jeanne peers through the hole and cocks an eyebrow. "I didn't think it would be morning so soon."

Mashu peers through the hole and at the sky. Sure enough, a ball of flame burns overhead. "It shouldn't be," Mashu mutters, "It can't be later than two am. What's going on?" Her eyes widen suddenly. "Caster! Is that you? What are you doing?"

'What only I can do.'

Only now does Mashu realise that the ball of flame is far closer to Orleans than the sun should be, and only now does she realise that it's centered over the cathedral. Burning bright and painful for any but Servants to gaze upon, a second sun burns to life over Orleans. The monsters below cry out in pain and fear at the sudden light, and beastial instinct drives them all into the air and away from the city. That alone would have brought the city time, a perfect opportunity to recover.

But Medea of Colchis is not done. Incredibly, the second sun moves.

It moves, with impossible swiftness for something so large, and crashes into the woods far south of Orleans. It sinks into the earth, vaporising the trees around it instantly and immolating kilometers of woodland around it within seconds. And then it detonates, a powerful shockwave that sends the forest and the earth beneath it churning, and killing its own inferno instantly.

Time drags on for long, speechless seconds after that display. No one could have broken that silence. It was sacred, sanctified by the birth and death of a newborn star.

And only then does Mashu realise what Medea has done.

"What did she do," Jeanne asks, split between anguish and awe.

"She found where Atalanta was and dropped a sun on her," Mashu says dumbly. "She bought us a reprieve."

The Ruler swiftly understands. The General in her takes charge, and Jeanne moves immediately. "Then we must make the most of it. Marie, take us to the cathedral."

"O-Oui!"
 
"I-If I turn, kill me… I don't wanna be a thot…"
*snort* Goddammit, Kana...:lol
Cu Chulainn crashes through the wall and off the ground, denting it severely but not falling through it, and gets on his feet by punching the ground. He looks like hell, his hair loose and wild and sticky with blood, his left arm gone above the elbow, several massive chunks blown out of his body… Chunks large enough to reach through to his back. It's a miracle that he's still alive, but it would take at least this much to kill him.

Lancer spits Gae Bolg out of his mouth and into his only remaining hand, and tilts his head apologetically at Mashu for all the blood he's sloshing - not dripping, that's not enough - onto the ground. 'Kind of busy,' he continues, still on their link. Mashu sees why; his throat is a mess. 'Stay right here, I almost have this guy!'

Only now does Mashu realise that the ball of flame is far closer to Orleans than the sun should be, and only now does she realise that it's centered over the cathedral. Burning bright and painful for any but Servants to gaze upon, a second sun burns to life over Orleans. The monsters below cry out in pain and fear at the sudden light, and beastial instinct drives them all into the air and away from the city. That alone would have brought the city time, a perfect opportunity to recover.
The Mother of all fireballs.
"She found where Atalanta was and dropped a sun on her," Mashu says dumbly. "She bought us a reprieve."
And this, people, is why you always gank the mage first!
 
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I wonder if Medea just ticked off their caster with that display? Her being an aspect(?) of a sun god and all that.

Mashu's response to Kana was perfect, as is Cu still emoting perfectly without a hand or vocal cords worth a damn.

Also Marie is great. I have a soft spot for ditzy but competent characters. Especially ones that have a horse made of actual diamonds.
 
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Omake - Meanwhile in Chaldea
2026 (???)

Chaldea (Not France)


"Wait. Wait wait wait." Saber puts down her teacup and slides it to Archer, who dutifully fills it up. "Caster. You threw a sun at Atalanta."

"I did," Medea nods matter-of-factly.

"She did," Atalanta rolls her eyes. "Seriously, don't you think that's a bit much?"

"I needed to buy the city time and I needed to deal with you. Creating a sun to scare the wyverns off and wound the vampires while forcing you to relocate from a lot of forest seemed like the best option." Medea nods conclusively and drinks deep of her coffee - black as death, just as she likes it (but is too ashamed to let Kuzuki Souichirou know). "Why didn't you not be such a frustrating opponent, Atalanta?"

"We were on opposite sides of the war. I had to carry out my Master's orders."

"And I had to save my Master's life."

Atalanta slams her hands down on the table, hard enough to make it rock. "You're just flaunting your heritage you poser. Your usual beamlaser spree would have been enough!"

"I'm just amazed you had this capability all this time and didn't think to use it on me," Arturia says with a frown. She crosses her arms and huffs. "I'm a bit offended, actually. Don't I deserve the sun?"

"Throwing a sun around in the middle of a populated city at a target that ignores magic of that caliber sounds like a wonderful idea, Saber," Archer notes dryly, while he hands her back her tea.

"...Fair point." Saber takes her tea back, drinks deeply of it, and hands it back to Archer. "Now I wonder what would win: The sun, or Excalibur?"

"Excalibur, no question," Medea states curtly. "What I did was mere magecraft. Excalibur is an Anti-Fortress Noble Phantasm."

"But it's not Anti-Sun, is it?"

"It only looks impressive, Saber."

Atalanta slams her hands down on the table again. "I fucking knew it you did it to look impressive you POSER."

Medea leans forwards and pats her on the head. "There there, Lanta, there there."

"S T O P."
 
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Cu Chulainn crashes through the wall and off the ground, denting it severely but not falling through it, and gets on his feet by punching the ground. He looks like hell, his hair loose and wild and sticky with blood, his left arm gone above the elbow, several massive chunks blown out of his body… Chunks large enough to reach through to his back. It's a miracle that he's still alive, but it would take at least this much to kill him.

No notable damage then?

Vlad Tepes, the Impaler, crashes through the still-tumbling debris, his face grim and his spear aimed at Jeanne's face. The Maid looks back with indifference.

He stops short, half his spearhead's length from her face. Through the center of his chest is a red spear, dripping with blood.

That's a really cool scene. It's easy to visualise, dramatic, action packed.

It moves, with impossible swiftness for something so large, and crashes into the woods far south of Orleans. It sinks into the earth, vaporising the trees around it instantly and immolating kilometers of woodland around it within seconds. And then it detonates, a powerful shockwave that sends the forest and the earth beneath it churning, and killing its own inferno instantly.

Time drags on for long, speechless seconds after that display. No one could have broken that silence. It was sacred, sanctified by the birth and death of a newborn star.

This really contextualises why everyone at Chaldea is so willing to put up with Medea.
 
I think you might be exaggerating Cu's Not-Die-Ness here. And I don't actually care.
I mean

You only need one lung to live

And half a liver

And you don't really need your intestines for anything shorter than a day

And having two arms is for posers anyways

Really, the only things Cu really needs are his head, his heart, his stomach, and Gae Bolg.
 
Good news everyone! The new characters from Fate/Apocrypha event are here.
We have ACHILLES!!!
.
.
Sorry had to do that.
Anyway we also have Chiron and surprisingly enough Sieg. Guess that means Jeanne is going to get her dragon husbando after all....and knowing japan he's going to have an alternate form of him in his little Shota form as well.
 
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