Chapter 160 - The Beast
"…and that takes care of that. So, what do you think?"
"Really, I'm not sure why you're asking me. It sound like you have everything accounted for." Carmen answers completely unhelpfully.
"I tried very hard to do that, but I'm not arrogant enough to think I know everything. That's why I was asking for your input. You're easily one of the best planners to come out of the City." you answer. To this day exactly how much of what happened beyond her death was part of Carmen's plan remains unknown, maybe even to her. Continuous awareness during the ten thousand years of cycles that Lobotomy Corporation went through wouldn't have been pleasant even if she hadn't spent it sealed in stasis preservation having her brain fluids drained. And thanks to Abram's depressive delusions, you know she was conscious at least some of the time. She probably didn't plan for things to go as far as they did, but she was still ahead of Ayin in the old team's chain of command. Every idea he had went through her.
"It's flattering that you think that, but I was hardly a strategist. Everyone accomplished what they did on their own. I was just giving them a push, like I'm doing now." Carmen denies, her eyes gleaming a deep crimson against the endless golden glow surrounding the two of you. You raise an eyebrow at her.
"Really? Because I'm not sure if inspiring people to overthrow a government that's existed for longer than recorded history counts as a 'push' to most people." you say, only half-joking. Charismatic people are everywhere, but people able to back up their words are another thing entirely. "But back to the point. You've heard my plan, you know what I'm asking. What are your thoughts?"
"I think it'll work. But you have more experience organizing battles."
"But you would know more about Abnormalities. None of my plans will work if I can't control the Wizard's behavior." you point out. Carmen was the source, the passage through which all the Abnormalities Lobotomy Corporation made were drawn. If anyone would understand them better than you, it would be her. And you can't afford uncertainty under these circumstances.
Carmen'a smile turns playful, but she pauses to think before answering you. "Your judgement looks correct here. Of course, we can't truly know what another person will choose until the moment comes, but people do have the capacity to understand one another."
You roll your eyes, but nod. "Jeez, you sounded like Binah there for a second." It's reassuring to have a second opinion supporting your plans. Even if she worded it in the least clear way possible. "And my other two questions?"
"On a technical level, your strategy should work. EGO Corrosion is easy to start intentionally even for somebody with no experience, and the three Birds want to reunite with one another. Wielding three EGO weapons at once would be a barrier to most people, but once you're past that there isn't anything else stopping you from performing the union. As long as you make sure to place a layer of separation between you and your body, you should be able to fully bond with the resulting concept without conflicting with it." Carmen explains.
"Good to know. It'd have been really embarrassing to have this whole talk and then return just to fail completely." you say. That's victory then, at least for this battle. You had hopes to save unleashing Twilight for the other Aleph in play. Between it and whatever damage Isabeau will have inflicted, you could've been fairly confident in your chances of victory against the Emerald City's ruler. The appearance of Winchester is an unpleasant complication. You'll either need to conserve your energy and hope to save enough to finish off the Adult Who Tells Lies afterwards or switch to one of your more tenuous plans.
All that is for the future, though. For now, you have a more immediate goal to reach. Once that's done with and Madoka is out of danger, you can move on to recontainment.
"I'm a little surprised that you didn't ask me to stay away from the children, actually." Carmen says. Her attention, still calm and casual, pierces through you and pulls you from your thoughts.
"Would you have listened? I don't make a habit of reaching for things beyond me. I don't want you to keep creating Distortions, but I can't stop you either, can I?" you say, resigned. Germinating and spreading the Light was the task you were made for. You, Angela, and the Sephirot all did your parts to bring it to fruition, hoping that it would allow the people of the City to understand one another, but it was Carmen's plan from the beginning. Nobody had more conviction to change the world than she did. If this is her decision, you have about as much of a chance of changing her mind as you do of seeing your new kids grow up.
"I just show people what they're already feeling. What conclusions they reach isn't up to me. As long as they're understanding themselves, I can be satisfied with the outcome." Carmen says. You exhale deeply, letting your frustration flow out of you. It would be pointless to bring up the death and chaos Distortions cause. Carmen already knows, and it hasn't stopped her so far.
"And you think that'll be enough on its own to fix humanity? When a person becomes a Distortion, it disconnects them from reality. You're hardly accepting yourself if you can only-" You cut yourself off, rubbing your eyes and waiting for your tension to recede. You just acknowledged that having this argument right now is pointless. It's unusual for you to get so worked up in the first place. "Whatever. I'm not here so I can argue philosophy with you. The kids'll be alright, and if they aren't I'll be there to fix it. It's basically the same as with my agents."
"I'm not sure if raising children like you're training employees is the best idea." Carmen teases. Her bright smile becomes a smirk for a moment before reverting back to her usual grin.
"Give 'em the tools they need, find challenges they can clear, and then set 'em off. If things go wrong, be ready to play cleanup." you recite. "Nope, seems perfectly fine. Speaking of setting off, I should probably do that soon. But before I do, is Ayin here as well? He should be, if my logic is correct."
He should be here. You had one chance to speak with the man who made you, back when there was hardly a division between you and him. You want to see him again while you have this chance. A million different reasons swirl inside you. You want to know if you've changed. You want to know if he's changed. You want to know what he thinks of you. You want to know how he feels about Angela. You just want to see him.
But for the first time since you appeared within the Light, Carmen's eyes don't meet yours. Some imperceptible element of wistfulness sneaks its way into her smile. "You can look for him. Maybe he'll appear before you, since you were one and the same once."
Ah. You get it. "Maybe another time. We should meet up with Angela later, have a real family reunion."
Moving at full speed for a moment, you leap forward and throw your arms around your mother. Now that you're up close, it's a little funny how much smaller than you she is. More amusing is how Carmen's eyes widen in surprise at the sudden contact. It's humanizing in a way, seeing her with more expressions than just that radiant smile of hers. A moment passes before your mother returns the embrace. She's stronger than you expected.
You hold each other for what might be seconds or might be longer. Time has little meaning here, after all. But far too soon you have to break away and let yourself begin to drift back to reality.
"I don't know if that's going to be possible." Carmen says in answer to your proposal. You return her smile, not nearly as bright but just as wide.
"We've done impossible things before, yeah? It can't be that much of a step up."
And so you fade back to reality.
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Your hand closes around the base of Justitia's blade. The world around you cracks and fractures. Darkness clings to your body. You take hold of the sheathe and pull.
It clicks open.
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Once upon a time, there were three Birds in a Black Forest.
These Birds sought to protect the creatures of their home. But they could not understand the thing that threatened those they sheltered, nor could they understand how to save them from the coming apocalypse. And so they reached for a solution and tore apart the Black Forest in the process. They aimlessly punished those who sinned without understanding the root from which their wrongdoing was born. They judged the creatures of the Black Forest ceaselessly and without reason in hopes of upholding fair and true justice. And they sought to save their fellows by subjecting them to a fate as horrible as any they could have faced in the future.
The Black Forest is empty now. Empty but for a bird with wings that block out the sky dotted with eyes that gleam brighter and harsher than the stars. It drags its bloated, bandaged body across the spot-colored forest floor with bloodstained talons. And it searches endlessly for the Beast, the Beast that will ruin the Black Forest. The Beast that made all the other creatures disappear. The Beast that they knew was coming and tried so hard to prepare for. Never understanding, never pausing to consider the truth.
But for a fraction of a sliver of a moment, the Black Forest is a little less empty. A second bird stares up at the first and sighs in resignation.
You don't hate the Head. How can you, when you hardly know anything about them? You hate the world that they made, that you have never seen in anything but borrowed memories. You hate what they have done to mankind in the name of preserving their own obscure idea of humanity. But you cannot hate the monster you stare up at any more than you hate yourself.
You are a monster too. Born in a crucible of sacrifices and necessary evils, commanded to save a world you've never seen. How can you claim to know what's best, to try and save humanity when you can't understand it? You know your Facility. You know your agents and your Abnormalities and your coworkers. It is your Black Forest, a place you will never leave no matter how far you go from it. From the moment you exceeded your intended ending, you became a looming threat. A Beast that will, in your own failure to understand, tear apart everything you wished to protect. You are an apocalypse sealed inside a person-shaped box.
Just like that, the sword is in your hands. Feathers hued a vibrant blood-red guard the simple golden hilt. The blade is less a blade at all than a seething mass of blackness forced into a shape. Glowing golden eyes stare in every direction from out of its depths. Twilight, awaiting the intent that will guide its edge. It will be yours for this moment, for this act. A mark of understanding between one Beast and another.
Something wet slides down your face. A single, silent tear. You don't understand why. You've already accepted all this already. There's no point reaching for the impossible, and no need for tears over being unable to grasp it.
So why?
You look up to the Beast of the Black Forest's overwhelming shape as though it will give you an answer. Of course, there is no reply. This place isn't the real Black Forest. Only a reproduction within your mind as you make the connections you need. If you were to stand before the real Apocalypse Bird, it would tear you to shreds without a second thought and then return to its search for a Beast it will never find. Wandering a forest that is its entire world.
What a miserable existence that must be.
What a miserable thing you will become.
All tools eventually wear out their use. You already know this. You've already accepted it. But staring down at the sword in your hands, you find yourself wavering.
Ever since you chose to reject your end, you have been trying. Because even when you've made mistakes, even when your decisions have gotten people hurt, you have only ever wanted to help people. To lift them up to where they could never have reached on their own. You don't want that to end.
You don't want to vanish in the end.
Somewhere within Twilight's darkness, a flicker of red shines through.
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You stand in the real world, sword in hand, and scarlet fire engulfs you. The tattered remains of your jacket flare out like a cape, the shredded sleeves a pair of wings spread behind you. Your shirt below has been similarly torn, revealing scarred flesh underneath. The sleeves are completely missing, one sheared cleanly off along with your arm and the other torn at some point during the battle. The flames wash over you, paring down the damaged parts and leaving behind just what has remained intact. You are damaged. Maybe you're damaged beyond repair. But you are alive now, and you refuse to give that up.
A coat settles on your shoulders, thick and rimmed with white fluff. A set of eleven brightly-colored stylized eye symbols line its inside layer. You know what it represents, and yet it doesn't feel so heavy. You can bear what you are, at least in this moment. The fire around you has bleached what remained of your uniform beneath it white, but you can work with that. It ties bandages around your forearms and lower legs, the same adornments that wrap around your true form. You let the reminder pass you by, unable to cling to your heart as it pleases. The bindings melt away and leave behind a thin layer of fabric in their place. Green lines trace across their surface, forming the shape of veins and nerves and roots all at once. Perhaps they are surgical gloves, or perhaps something more aesthetically-focused. Another rush of flame layers another patch of bandages over your torso. Holding you together, because you want to remain as you are in this moment for as long as you can. They fall away as well, like a moth casting away the husk of its cocoon. Underneath is a finely-tailored suit of the same soft shade of purple-blue as Angela's dress. Your family is one of the few things you have been allowed to choose for yourself. You will wear their connection with pride. Finally, the heat recedes and hardens into a circular teal-green brooch sitting right on your neckline where Angela's own rests.
You twirl Twilight in your hand experimentally, watching the blade stretch and flow through the air. It's almost like a hole in space, opening up to a world of eyes staring up through endless darkness. The shadows around you dance and turn with it, deepening and fading as it passes them by. The air stills in its wake, emptied of all life by even a moment's passage. There's something within it, waiting to be called out, but you let it sit for now. It's good to keep a few surprises in reserve if possible.
All around you, Winchester howls with its screeching voice. The Mirror Witch sits reflected in every angle around you, perched within cracks leading out to countless scenes. Not a heartbeat passes before space around you is reduced to splinters by the web of cracks shooting through it from every direction. You sweep Twilight in a lazy circle around yourself and split the fractures apart as they approach. Nothing is cleaved from nothing, leaving something in its place. The diverted cracks score the ground with nonsensical patterns and trail off impotently into the distance. You sit at the center of the devastation, untouched, and smile up at Sena.
"You don't get to mock us! To mock what we've been through! I won't let you!"
Winchester's hands close in front every direction. Something in the air grinds against them, wearing down their outer layers as they approach. You dance between the outstretched limbs, carving into their wireframe flesh with casual sweeps of Twilight as you ponder Sena's accusation. Mocking her? You're not sure how, unless you count just smiling at her.
Winchester unfolds once again, and the wounded space around it comes alive with colorless flame. At the same time, it occurs to you. You just had a transformation sequence, didn't you? And Mami and Sayaka missed it. Ah well, maybe you'll be able to do it again later. You have more important things to worry about at the moment.
"I'm not intending to mock you. I just want to be somebody people can look to for support. And I'll start with a little advice." you say. You can feel energy flooding you, filling the gaps in your being. Tiny cracks and wounds, opening bit by bit since Nothing There first tore you open. So slowly that you never even felt them. But the relief you feel now that the pain is gone is beyond compare. Of course, once this rush ends, you'll feel that pain again all at once, so it'll be best to hurry things along.
The hollow energy bursts from the gap in space behind Winchester like a tidal wave, filling your vision with searing white. This time, instead of sheltering yourself, you face it head-on.
"You're a Magical Girl, right? I gave you a free pass on this the first time, but you're supposed to call it out when you do a special attack like this. Here, I'll show you."
The sword in your hand ripples, and the feeling inside you erupts once again. The will to stand by your choices, your very existence, and reject the order that claims you are wrong. To charge headlong towards the impossible and strike it down. You call, and Twilight answers. Its gleaming gold hilt becomes tarnished steel, the guard a set of interlocking hexagonal plates that hide a mechanical red glow. The blade has changed from a churning column of darkness to a beam of blazing crimson light. To call it fire would be an insult. It would be like comparing a spark to a supernova. The air sizzles and whines as the sword cuts through it, backed by your full intent for the first time since Apocalypse Bird's weapon met your hands.
"Red Twilight!"
You swing upwards, and the world turns crimson.
As war's light crashes against the Mirror Witch's enmity, the world shakes. With space already mangled by Winchester's careless attacks, it is no question of what will buckle first in such a confrontation. The carefully-constructed web of gaps and fractures pieces together to surround you splinters. Cracks scatter into the Emerald City's horizon, running along the cityscape like faults in an earthquake. The places where streets and buildings once stood are torn open to reveal snow-covered mountaintops, sunlit beaches, or bubbling magma pools. Shimmering fragments of glass fill the air. And in the center of it all, the Witch's hollow radiance parts under the weight of your strike.
The white flames aren't deterred entirely. Even the guttering remnants that manage to reach you are enough to sear the surface of your skin. But it's an exchange you accept gladly. Twilight's transfigured blade is a streak of crimson tearing up towards the sky. It strikes Winchester's center, just below where Sena is wrapped with its embrace. The Mirror Witch shrieks along with its wielder as it tumbles back, flattening a building that might have been a school before the Emerald City enveloped it. As it rises back up to the center of its perch within the crack in space, you see cracks running along its body.
You step forward and feel sunlight against your face. You glance upward to see the ceiling of the Emerald City broken open, rubble and dust tumbling down towards you. Through the gaping hole, the evening sun smiles down on you. You smile back.
"You asked me why I bothered pretending? Why I didn't act like the monster we both know I am?" you say as Sena assaults you from every direction. Twilight wards off a wave of cracks tearing through space towards you. A Soldier flickers into existence behind you just long enough to take a shot from one of Winchester's Familiars before you seize it by the arm and toss it towards her oncoming fist. It erupts it a brilliant monochrome burst that propels you thought the air and up to one of Winchester's mirror images. The fake shatters easily beneath Twilight's edge. "It's because I'm choosing to be human! Because that's what I want, to live my life like a human would! I choose not to be a monster!"
"Y-you…" Sena rasps, and the edges of the gap Winchester now lies in start to close in on themselves. Whether she intends to reposition or retreat, you have no intention of allowing it. You kick off the street and sail through the air toward the narrowing gap. As you go, the red bleeds away and Twilight returns to its base form in time to deflect another fracture aimed at your head.
You clear the edge of Winchester's gap just as it closes only to find yourself immediately surrounded by the Witch's Familiars. The section of the Emerald City you've landed in is a wide courtyard with no nearby cover for you to hide behind. Despite the disadvantageous position, all you can do is nod appraisingly. This was an effectively-executed trap, amplified by the fact that it diverges from the behavior you've seen from Sena and her Witch up until this point. Either she's finally woken up all the way, she's starting to get used to how to use this set of abilities, or both.
Unfortunately for your opponent, it's all moot. You may not have expected the ambush, but you were still prepared for it. The riflemen fire in perfect sync, but a few sweeps of Twilight carve out a path in the gunfire wide enough for you to dive through. You twist in midair to avoid another crack shooting towards you and reply by lashing Twilight out like a whip. Bolts of golden energy scatter like shotgun pellets in Winchester's direction.
You land closer to Sena just in time to see your attack land. Some hammer into Winchester's skin, it just as many are caught by the web of pale white cracks that stretches out to cover the Witch's defenseless form. The sound of shattering glass alerts you just barely too slowly to your own projectiles emerging from behind you. It sends you stumbling across the courtyard and through another portal. You emerge in midair, falling amidst the rubble of the Emerald City's shattered false skies. The cracks spread further around you, and Winchester is once again reflected in every direction. They are beaten and wounded, but brimming with energy. Within her harness, Sena cries out triumphantly. She really is pulling out all the stops, huh?
It won't be enough to defeat you. You swore that you would save this girl that you barely know. That even if she sees herself as your enemy, that you will make a path for her to find a better life than one as a puppet to a monster. So you will.
The ensuing onslaught of fragmenting space is terribly predictable. So far, Sena's always used her most precise, damaging attacks as the payoff for her traps. There is plenty of tactical merit to it. Very few things are as effective at damaging targets mostly bound to the laws of physics as taking a part of their body and having it suddenly be somewhere else. It's lethal, nearly impossible to block, and invisible to anybody whose senses aren't expanded by something like Lamp. But once you've seen it so many times, it becomes routine to avoid.
Mimicry lances out from your free hand and latches onto a nearby chunk of wall that might have once been part of a church. With your new leverage, it's child's play to swing Twilight in an arc that leaves you completely untouched.
The hands that sail through the air towards you is just as predictable. You wheel around and strike the first one, approaching behind you faster than the hand that had emerged clearly in your view. A decent bluff, but not good enough. Two of Winchester's fingers join the cloud of rubble tumbling through the air. The other hand reaches you, and you don't bother to dodge. Instead, you kick off the air and slam into it early. The angle sends you spinning off and into one of the fading cracks still running through the air like a frozen bolt of lightning. Your free hand reaches into your pocket, and Leonie presents a pathway where the void should have been.
You emerge before the Mirror Witch at an absurd speed. Twilight's blade is a streak of black filled with golden stars. You don't know how much more punishment Winchester can take, but you do know that you can't waste energy finding out. So you aren't going to.
The black sword sweeps cleanly through steel and glass, turning the wireframe cage that bound Sena to Winchester into scrap in a single motion. The same movement terminates at the Mirror Witch's core, sending its gargantuan body soaring through the Emerald City. It crushes buildings under its passage, landing in a tangled heap like a discarded puppet. Inanimate and soon to break down.
Sena flails in midair as the two of you fall. With a resigned grunt, you let Twilight fade and seize the screaming girl's wrist. She screams louder, of course, but you ignore it and shift her to a more cushioned position. The ground's coming up, and it wouldn't do to have this all end with an unpleasant landing.
Your impact with the street is interrupted by another of the Emerald City's overdecorated buildings, which is made indistinguishable from the rubble falling alongside you by your landing. Sena continues to scream even as you unceremoniously drop her to the ground. You would've been more gentle, but the flailing made it hard enough just to hold her steady. Especially trying not to be too forceful.
Sena's screams trail off to a reading cough. The coughing becomes a fit, heaving and shaking until a thick black sludge bubbles up from her lips. The Grief spills onto the earth below you, glistening with its kaleidoscopic darkness.
"F… f-fine… Just-" Sena's words are cut off by another fit of coughing. "Fi- finish it… I- I can't… I don't want to…" Her eyes are hollow as she stares up at you, empty of everything but a glimmer of fear easily overwhelmed by the dull weight of resignation. You hate seeing such a look directed at you.
"I'm going to knock you unconscious right now. And then I'm going to find you a doctor, alright?" you say gently. "I don't know exactly what's been done to you, but I swear that I only want to help. And once you're better and this is all over, I'll let you go."
It's not really a lie. Even once the Adult Who Tells Lies has been suppressed, there will be cleanup to do. The most difficult of which will be uprooting whatever impressions she's put into the Magical Girls she tricked into working for her. Once that's over with, you'll be able to let her go.
Not that you think Sena can ever hear your words anymore. Nothing beyond your tone of voice, at least. Her body convulses and shivers as she vomits up more and more thick, tarry Grief. She drops to all fours, shaking too hard to remain on her feet. No reaction as you reach out and take hold of her Soul Gem. One of her arms gives out and she nearly falls into the puddle of Grief forming in front of her. You catch the still-costumed Magical Girl in one arm and carry her to a nearby crevasse. A tap to Leonie in your pocket, and the gap opens up to rows and rows of beds under a starry night sky.
"I'll be back soon. For now, I have other children to take care of."
You set Sena's body down on the bed and let the Route close for now. The connection to her Soul Gem in your pocket snaps, and the empty, desperate pangs of hunger that you had felt from Sena cease.
You'll certainly have your work cut out for you. But for now, you have a job to do.