Omake - Second Poscast
HEEEEEY AVERNUSS! IT'S YOUR BOY
BILLY BURR ANNNND I'M JUST CHECKING IN ON YOU!
I have to check in on my squad mates all over the planet right? Anyways I thought for this podcast I'd answer some fan mail that came just now actually. Their's like 3 I really want to answer because I think it's important too. An you know what's important for an ex trooper and now comedian like me must be important to all of you right?! HAHAHA
Anyways first question is from Margarette Thompson over by Elysium. Keep in mind no city so this person obviously wants some anomyinity and that's okay. We all like our privacy right Jane? Right. Hehehe. Oh boy maybe I just can't stop with that one. So this messege reads as follows:
Dear Bill Blow Hard,
I wanted to have your advice on going to Byzantium since my sons seem to want to move there with there wives. Very recently I lost my husband in the Ork Invasion and I haven't really felt as lonely as I am now. I know that one day I too will die and I'm not as young and free of grief as I was then. The Doctors I have sent me to therepy and prescriptions to deal with my 'anxiety' issues but the relief is slight and short.
My sons tell me that there friends who have moved there work hard every day but die of old age and do so very happily. Most of them get to die with there first mates which is something that I thought would happen with my late husband before he died in service. What do you think?
Also P.S I love your shows and your podcast. It's one of the few things that helps me keep going in life now.
....
Geezus! I had to wipe some tears of my eyes. Um, Listen I am not going to tell you what to do with that and I'm going to just assume you have a ticket to get out or however it is that the immigration thing works. I don't know i'm not a clerk i'm a comedian at bars and comedy clubs. Anyways, First I feel for your husband and I know how hard it is to lose the people you love. I'm on my 15th wife right now and thankfully we've lived pretty well together but even I know that can change.
The thing is, for me, even if she died I know I would get over it. I'd stop doing shows and making money and maybe go to church and therapy more but I'd get back into the groove of things you know? It's just um, I don't second nature I guess? Ma'am you know yourself better than me so you need to know whether or not you want to keep living here. I know I've trashed migrants but in reality that's just shit talking that I do. Avernus is a Death World first and Foremost and it always will be. Not everyone who grew up here has what it takes despite, you know, the education you get from it.
I mean I know one family, a Cadian Branch, called the Philzens who migrated to Midgard because of some armament company they really wanted to set up. An last I heard buisness was booming over there and the grand kids are joining the Midgardian Army as Combat Engineers which is great. For Fjol IV I know that right now there looking for architects, city planners, and alot of farmers. So re-classing is really possible if you can get over your fear of the grass and dirt. So you know it's a possibilty and I wish you luck Ma'am.
Okay i'm going to take a break after that because as you all know, I the Great Bill Burr, am a cowardly line men who turned to comedy to make a living. Have some comercials folks and i'll be back. I gotta dry some tears from my face.
*Some time later*
Alrighty then next question. This is from Hermann from Lisdon's Queen's Park.
Hey Billy Goatee!
I wanted to get your opinon on the upcoming Bladesman Finals between Connor MaGrue and Floyd 'Flow' Faerywether fight. Who do you think is going to take home the win? I'm not sure if Flow has enough defense for the youngster but then again he does love to play guirilla tactics like if he was Catachan so i'm not sure. Thoughts?
Ya my thoughts exactly actually. You know the thing about Bladefighters that I don't like is the finnesse that it takes to be one. You can't just hack and slash like a dolt like me would do because your going to get eviscerated for that. You have to..i mean I don't know. I know why Floyd does what he does but it's just not as entertaining as Connor who just playes that aggrevise style where he comes in to stop your posturing and just keeps wailing on you until you lose out to exhaustion. An both of ther counter attacks are sick too so their's that too.
So yeah put me down as a 'I don't know' or a 'down the middle' because that's a tough fight to call. I will say this though I am so ticked that Dana Black is putting more Private School Graduates into the system. I mean I love the kids but they need to be in the fricking service not being superstars in a barbed wire ring haing fun poking each others organs out. Do your service first, get rejuvenated, and than when you have that experience go into the ring. Alot of these kids only have the minimum experience and there school training when they get in. I know it's good training but it's not enough to be at that 'excellent' level and it takes alot of training afterwards to get into that mentality. My opinion though and what do I know? I'm a comedian on a podcast talking trash.
Alright last question
What's going on Bill?
This is Private Gambrit from the Line Infantry Regiment at Outpost 33251. I know you were a recent guardsmen here and I wanted to ask if you could relate some of your experiences here with us. The current regiment has been combined with some other regiments and we are having issues with cohesion when it comes to getting of a proper line or advancing under fire.
HAHAHAHAHA
Yeah you know all this is a cheeky private. Listen man your in a bad regiment and theirs not alot you can do about it. You do have to follow your orders and hope everyone else does there part that's just how it goes in the Army. I will say this is if you have the chance talk to your sergeant or a popular guardsmen in your regiment and see if you guys can have a barracks party. You'd be surprised what some alcohol and 'therapy' can do for you guys. Just make sure to plan it out and go through the forms. Especially if your getting some of those newly graduated therapists with bad degrees. Everyone likes company but you gotta watch out for Harley Therapists that try to sucker you into worshiping the Blighted Gods.
Other than that though hope everything works out for you Gambrit.
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Thoughts on Omake?