Don't mind me...
Omake: New, Japanese Things (Extra)
The first thing Trista does after the two of you sleep for TEN THOUSAND YEARS is slap you into your nicest suit (and lose twenty minutes just kinda staring at you) and then drag you to a ramen joint. Now, you're a Michigander, your idea of a hole-in-the-wall is a tiny place "downtown" without a proper entrance which might not have its hours posted right. This is an actual hole in a wall, like, some building rented part of its front space so an old dude could set up a kitchen and a counter space and sell ramen. There are stools. You protest in vain that you've had ramen, real ramen, before, that there's this place down in Adrian that does it up nice (its sister city has been Moriyama, out in Shiga, for longer than even your uncle's been alive), but your complaints fall on deaf ears. Is ramen even breakfast food? Trista does not care. Her ass is not paying attention. Plenty of other people are, though, to the two foreigners dressed up like they're about to hit a high society ball while Trista gabbles on at you in Japanese about what you've been missing out on.
Thank fucking Christ for the translation spell.
You have to admit, it hits different. Maybe it's a New York Bagel kinda situation, something in the water or the ingredients is unique in a way you could only get in Japan; it's both richer and spicier than you were expecting, with a pleasant tingle that warms the part of you that's always, at least a little bit, dead. And the old guy behind the counter, who usually serves locals, is pleased as punch to have a couple foreigners gushing at him, jovially upselling ingredients and complimenting Tristra's gold-and-black dress and asking where the two of you are going this early in the morning, dressed like such princesses.
"We're still deciding," Trista teases coyly.
"She's going to the manga store," you answer flatly, earning yourself a slap on the shoulder. "If she doesn't buy at least one a week the vessel that holds her soul will shatter."
"Rachael!"
"Whose fault is it that you're a lich? Whose? Whose exactly? How's that nine-decade-late fan sequel to Sacrifice coming along you goddamn undead wizard?" The older gentleman gives you a reproachful look, and you smile guiltily. "Sorry, grandfather, American manners. We forget ourselves in the presence of real food."
"Don't let her fool you, this is the Irish part," Trista corrects, seizing the initiative and the last word, which you let her have because holy god this broth -
The two of you end up thoroughly suckered into buying seconds.
"Seriously though," Trista says, turning to you. "C'mon, there's gotta be something you're curious about."
"There's tons I'm curious about, but we do need to bow to the needs of our work schedule," you point. "I can't exactly go hiking through Hokkaido right now, can I?" She opens her mouth and then shuts it with that angry pout she gets when you're right and she knows you're right. "Not to be, you know, American or anything, but I do wanna hit up a bar sometime, try out the Japanese Highball, some real sake, maybe...that thing you mentioned. Do you know any...?"
"...Any Japanese drinks?"
"Dyke bars, Trista, dyke bars - I just said that in front of our host didn't I?"
"You did!" He announces, clapping his hands together. And then he writes something down on a slip of receipt paper and slides it across the 'bar'. "Luckily for a pair of visiting princesses, I am a man with daughters who made me understand that to teach must also be to learn. These are the establishments they've mentioned."
You favor him with a shy little smile. "You're cool, grandfather," you tell him, as you take the slip of paper and pocket it. "You got any other suggestions before I make a dumb tourist of myself?"
He shrugs. "Why be other than as you are? It seems foolish to come to a country for the first time and avoid things simply because its people now take them for granted. Besides, another of my daughters is on the tourism board."
"Why are you making ramen?"
He laughs. "I like making ramen!"
There are a few more ideas bandied about, and then, as the two of you get up to leave, Trista does that thing she does where she zips through a stack of cash - yen, in this case - to count it fucking instantly, and then leaves it on the counter while your host has his back turned. She hurries you away, and you follow, bemused.
"Was that expensive?" you ask, only to be interrupted by Some Manner of emotional yelling from the direction of the ramen stand.
"I may," Trista says primly, "have left enough to buy out his business with. Three times."
"YOUNG LADIES, YOU HAVE FORGOTTEN YOUR MONEY!"
"Bitch, how rich fucking are you?"
Trista waggles her fingers at you. "Trap-filled dungeons to guard my reliquary don't build themselves, Sailor Bathwater."