Remove ads

Harry Potter and the Skittering Spouse

Reader mode
Okay now that I've gotten to actually read this latest chapter I can positively say that it was great. Harry learning to be proactive is good, and the fact Molly isn't full of Doxy venom is also a good sign that Harry's been a very good influence on Taylor. And yeah, there is a point where practicing the active portion of the proactive mindset is a major detriment in war.

Taylor going off on her own absolutely would've been falling into that particular trap. Taylor does the most good in conflicts when she has solid preparation. Sure she can improvise to great effect if she needs to, but honestly it's not a good mindset to have.
 
Oh how cute they are feeding on one another's neurosis's.
In classic Taylor fashion, the bad news is that everyone she trains is going to need therapy, the good news is they are going to be alive to get said therapy.
 
Fencer said:
"I hadn't thought of that, you think he might break cover to try and rescue Malfoy?" Taylor frowned. "Or would that be maintaining his cover if he really is on our side?"
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

And that might be useful too.
Reveal Malfoy, grab him, interrogate him, let Snape rescue him to reinforce his cover.
They're stuck with a useless kid who can't even be an informant anymore hanging around their base!
 
Oh, I'm LIKING this. It's so rare to read a story with Harry being proactive. I so want to see what they do to expose Draco. Heh, and I have to say that I loved the part where Harry asked if Draco had already been branded like cattle.

And the scene with Molly, and later Ron and Hermione... Molly is getting closer and closer to being banned from that home. I'm honestly not sure how much longer even Harry's patience and fondness will carry her. The fact that Ron actually agreed with Taylor... Molly is not showing herself in a good light to anyone here.

And the talk afterward about planning for the war was just fun. Both the reality of the situation which Taylor keeps throwing in the Golden Trio's faces? It's a necessary wake up call for them. Maybe this time around they won't run head first into a meat grinder.

Lastly, below are some typos for your editing pleasure:

Fencer said:
the best chance ning we get to ask
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
ning - I'm pretty sure that shouldn't be there.

out of our home in obnoxious harridan!
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
in - you

But beyond that Harry and Dumbledore are both at Hogwarts.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
that Harry - that, Harry

such a look thay Hermione shrank
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
thay - that

Hermione sputtered. "You mean to tell me
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
sputtered. "You - sputtered, "You
 
Fencer said:
Naaaah Moldy fuck would probably execute him for failing so spectacularly…. Or torture him then send him on suicide mission.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

Draco getting killed is really not that great a loss to be honest, but I do think he'd be semi-lenient considering Narcissa and Lucius' years of service, he'd definitely get Crucio'ed though. That said I hope Taylor learns about the Vanishing Cabinet from him, because that might allow for some truly amazing strategies for her to come up with.
 
As for dealing with Death Eaters, may I remind everyone that there ARE venomous insects available for Taylor to use in case the stupid idiots decide to be REALLY stupid. Look no father than mp3.1415player's wonderful crossover here.

A simple wasp sting would do the job very quickly.
 
Pyeknu said:
As for dealing with Death Eaters, may I remind everyone that there ARE venomous insects available for Taylor to use in case the stupid idiots decide to be REALLY stupid. Look no father than mp3.1415player's wonderful crossover here.

A simple wasp sting would do the job very quickly.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
And Taylor can look pleased as punch and say she had nothing to do with such mysterious attacks
 
Honestly Taylor needs to teach the trio how to properly trash talk/get inside people's heads.

If they'd, say, asked narcissa if now that Lucius is locked up she can tell them who Draco's real father is, he would have lost his shit, used underage magic, and quite likely gotten the dark mark discovered.

Bonus points if Ron says he's got 5 quid on Snape being his real father.

Also, backing it all up on A03 doesn't mean you'll stop posting it here, right?
 
@Fencer Here are some grammar issues I noticed in chapter 1 since I'm giving this a full re-read once more. Normally I'd not really care, but recently I've been thinking on lots of writing tips to help advise my baby sister who wants to get into writing. One of the more minor, but still fairly important, things that came to mind is that first impressions are super important. So you should probably try to at least make sure the very first chapter of any story is as polished as possible to draw in more readers.

Fencer said:
alt earth
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

alternate Earth

Fencer said:
just advice you to go
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

advise

Fencer said:
work on terrorist
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

terrorists


Anyways, figured I'd point these out since they caught my eye this read through.
 
parnary said:
Honestly Taylor needs to teach the trio how to properly trash talk/get inside people's heads.

If they'd, say, asked narcissa if now that Lucius is locked up she can tell them who Draco's real father is, he would have lost his shit, used underage magic, and quite likely gotten the dark mark discovered.

Bonus points if Ron says he's got 5 quid on Snape being his real father.

Also, backing it all up on A03 doesn't mean you'll stop posting it here, right?
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
Still going to post here yes. Probably even still post to ff.net even but we'll see how long that lasts.
 
Among with the other typos posted by others, Lich is written as Litch a bunch.

Good chapter, now hopefully Hermione and Ron pull their heads out of their asses. It's getting to be a bit much with their distrust imo
 
parnary said:
If they'd, say, asked narcissa if now that Lucius is locked up she can tell them who Draco's real father is, he would have lost his shit, used underage magic, and quite likely gotten the dark mark discovered.

Bonus points if Ron says he's got 5 quid on Snape being his real father.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
Absolutely hilarious!!! I can see this working like a charm… especially if Narcissa doesn't immediately deny it.
 
FF.Net will likely crash and burn by 2030 at the rate it's going. I don't blame you for looking elsewhere for a place to post your stories.

Though, given that FF.Net has been around since the 1990s, that's probably one of the longest living websites in the world.

Taylor and Harry are going to twist each other into nigh unrecognizable messes to everyone else.
 
Hmmm...

Take Draco/Crabbe/Goyle specifically to check and interrogate and obliviate, then if there's at least one Dark Mark turn them over as a test.

Or

Wait for a meal with no absences and vanish every student's sleeves simultaneously as a 'prank'.

Or first the first, and after the second.

--

Taylor kicking Molly out of Taylor's own house was well done.

Harry's confrontation with Draco and Narcissa was well done, too; I mean, it's a cluster, but no spells were actually cast.

Hermione and Ron talking right in front of Malkin was... regrettably on brand.

Harry understanding Taylor doesn't trust the Order just because she's told she should by the Order was well done.

--

Sad that Taylor hasn't even found black widow equivalents yet, much less Darwin Bark.
 
Fencer said:
So, I'll be cross posting my ongoing works, namely this and my Star Wars fic, to archive of our own. You can find me there under the user name Fencer22, if that's something you're interested in, and if not this will serve as verification that they are in fact my works and no I'm not stealing them. It might take me a bit because a) I've got carona, and b) I'm planning to actually go through and edit which will suck.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

I feel your pain, ff.net's update mails are the same here
 
I keep imagining the fallout of Molly suggesting that Harry and/or Taylor be Imperioused "for their own good". It sounds ooc I know, but the more she's denied and refused the more desperate and extreme she's likely to become.
 
Reader mode
You must login or register to reply here.
Remove ads
Back
Top