Voting status:
Vote early, vote often. And post QM catnip.
- [1] Tell Machina about...
- - [1] Mami dying earlier
- - [1] You think a wish brought her here
- - [1] The wish is likely caused Mami to come back to life.
- - [1] You have a body sort-of-separate from best girl.
- - [1] the fact you're dating Sakura Kyouko
- - [1] the fact that she needs to NOT PANIC, things will be okay somehow, just stop panicking!
Is Mami okay? you ask. This will be the first thing that Machina is concerned about, of course, and you're worried yourself.
Yes! exclaims Machina, more excitedly than you expect.
She's a little bit on the silly side at the moment, which is my doing. For a moment I was afraid that she might do something rather unwise.
The silly side, you reiterate.
These are most extraordinary circumstances! she exclaims, a little defensive.
I most certainly wouldn't dream of just hyping her up on neurotransmitters like this under anything remotely resembling normal circumstances.
I'm just worried about the crash, you tell her.
I'll manage it, she insists.
But what's happening? As far as I can tell it's 2011, and nothing makes sense.
Where to begin…
Yes, it's 2011, you reply.
I'm not exactly sure why Ryouko is here. I think that you're here because Mami died and was brought back with a wish.
Oh, a wish! she exclaims.
Glorious. That makes a lot more sense. I mean, this place would be a terrible Heaven, wouldn't it now? I would have some words with the Goddess about setting expectations.
Huh. Why would she put it that way, unless…
Did you know she'd died? you ask.
Oh, I assumed as much right away. The squid attacked with overwhelming force! It was so sudden. They opened a wormhole in Earth orbit, without a stabilizer! Didn't you know? All our ships were dropping like flies, it was only a matter of time or fate until ours would be hit. Everyone was looking for you, of course, but Mitakihara proper was swarmed by demons and no one could get through to anyone. Absolutely terrifying! Mami was certain someone had betrayed us.
Oh, you say.
Yes, we were aware of… much of that.
But 2011, for real! says Machina.
How astonishing! Is the rest of the Mitakihara Five here? Oh, but how can Ryouko be here too? You say it was a wish? Oh, goddess, what will all this do to the timeline?
Yes, a wish, you say.
You know the matriarch Shizuki Sayaka, of course — her mother attends the local middle school, and some students found her almost as soon as she got here, and the resemblance was uncanny. She did her best to play the amazing-coincidence card, but the real damage that blew our cover was … actually, let's not get into that right now. More relevant — Oriko has been playing mind games with absolutely everyone, stole Mami's apartment, and goaded her into an attack on the unknown magical girls at her school, which ended up with Ryouko, Mami and Miki Sayaka all dead
. Then one of the other students made a wish, and brought everyone back.
Oh! exclaims Machina.
Oh, dear. Well, that explains a few things. But why am I here, myself?
Because Nakimura Nanami, who made the wish, caught a bad case of future-envy, and now all her friends and everyone who died and came back has twenty-fifth century implants, and the magical girls have tactical computers. Though we're the only version-two instances, I'm pretty sure. The others girls don't have one in the future, I guess? She only has version 1.8 herself.
Goodness. Who's affected, then? she asks.
And do we have the whole Mitakihara Five?
It's a mess, you say.
Besides Nanami, we have Akemi Homura, before the vision and personality shift — she heard voices in her head from the implants, and decided to conduct an exorcism on herself, and was able to magic them right back out. The civilians with future implants right now are Tenjou Wakaba, Shiina Yuuka, Miki Sayaka, Shizuki Hitomi, and Kaname Madoka.
Shizuki and Kaname? That's two sides of your family tree, isn't it! observes Machina.
And Sayaka not contracted yet, I see.
We also met Sakura Kyouko, who wasn't affected, but…
You pause.
Clarisse? asks Machina.
You look for words.
Is something wrong, Clarisse?
oh goddess you can't do this
Tell me that you didn't
let her seduce Ryouko, says Machina, with some concern.
Exactly! I stopped her from seducing Ryouko, you exclaim, letting a little too much nervousness show through.
…
This is going to be most interesting, says Machina, after a pause.
I can tell. Pray tell, how exactly did you stop her?
Take deep breaths, Clarisse.
I maybe kind of, sort of, a little bit… seducedherinstead
The line is silent for several seconds.
Okay, Clarisse, she begins,
first of all, as you were specifically informed in your programming, making a young impressionable girl think she's the one doing the seducing is totally
a Sakura Kyouko tactic —
Your senpai is judging you so hard right now.
Not this Kyouko! you interrupt.
She's like fifteen years old, she's hardly that smooth.
… Second of all, continues Machina, in a slightly lighter tone,
I should like to know exactly how a twenty-fifth century tactical computer seduces a twenty-first century magical girl.
Well… it was at least partially accidental… This is really, really embarrassing.
I mean the physical mechanics of it, she clarifies.
Goddess protect you.
Was it role-play over the Internet? asks Machina.
Did you sext her with bit-mapped images, on her cell phone?
So as. I may. Have mentioned. Before. There. Was. A. Wish. you declare, forwarding several snapshots of relevant scenes of the three of you, reconstructed from your and Ryouko's visual inputs.
Oh, Clarisse! replies Machina.
Oh, oh, oh, wow. Oh, Clarisse, you are absolutely darling
. But… oh, goddess, this is the first thing you do? Seriously?
It was hardly the first thing! you protest.
Screaming was first.
How long did it take, though? she wants to know.
How long between screaming and… smooching?
There was no smooching! you insist.
How long?
at least sixteen hours, you reply quietly
Wowowowowowowowowowowow.
She is laughing at you so hard right now.
It's not funny! you tell her, knowing that it is, in fact, hilarious, but you just can't appreciate it right now, and there are serious parts too.
We went to her old church and she curled up on my lap, crying about her dead sister! What was I supposed to do, toss her to the floor? And — and then, after, she did her illusion magic again.
Wait, she did what??? Oh, Clarisse, that's … okay, wow. That is genuinely special.
Thank you, you reply, in relief. Praise the goddess, your senpai is taking you seriously again.
I'm totally shipping you two now, she adds.
... maybe not entirely seriously.
Most important topics are still unaddressed, and you have a very very small amount of new information about the twenty-fifth century! No new prompts.
We now return you to your regularly scheduled voting.
