Belated Battleships (KanColle) [REHOST]

[Icywinter]

Interesting thought... Gale decides to take Wash with her clubbing and said battleship sees Gale promptly rip up the dancefloor. Alternatively, Gale decides to teach Wash modern day dancing...

What would be Wash's reaction be.

Click to shrink...

San Fran : Hahahahaha

(silly idea, the tech with the magic hands.

Click to shrink...

San Fran : Already found him... and wow, magic doesn't even begin to cover what he can do...

*Shivers*

 

[theJMPer]

Part 35​

"So," Jersey did her best to scowl at the plotting table while still chewing on her most recent bite of muffin. "Do we wanna talk about why you're just now telling me the third-best battleship in the world's on our side?"

Admiral Goto reacted almost on instinct, his tone shifting from the long-suffering-Admiral's monotone to a more guarded, calculated PR dialect. "Sortieing Musashi would be politically untenable," he said absentmindedly tugging his uniform smooth, "her appetite is vast, and her utility limited. A battleship has no role in anti-submarine pickets, and she's far too hungry to waste on simple shore patrols."

"Deja-fucking-vu," said Jersey. She knit her brows as she popped another muffin into her mouth. "Lemme guess, her triple-A sucks ass too."

Goto nodded, "If we can't sortie her, we can't upgrade her armaments. And we can't sortie her without upgraded anti-aircraft weaponry."

"Damned if you do, damned if you don't, eh?" Jersey gulped as she swallowed the muffin whole.

"Indeed," said Ooyodo, her appearing above the wall of televisions dominating her desk before popping back like a shore-battery cannon. "And the loss of a Yamato-class super battleship for anything less than an earthshaking cause would cripple the morale of the entire nation."

"It's the same problem we've been facing with Arizona," Wiliams' scowl mirrored Jersey's, although the Admiral had noticeably fewer muffin crumbs piled up on his uniform. "I'm more curious why you rated Musashi as third-best."

"I as well," said Ooyodo, only the crown of her head visible above her parapet of screens.

Jersey smirked, her teeth glinting in a cocky smile. Her smile faded as she realized the answer wasn't as blatantly obvious to her Admiral as it was to her. "Okay..." she said, counting off on her fingers, "Sammy, me, 'sashi." The battleship turned on her heel to face the command cruiser slowly being eaten by her desk, "Duh."

"Sammy?" said Goto, shooting a sideways glance at his American counterpart.

Williams gave a nod of acceptance, "I'll buy it."

"But surely," said Ooyodo, "Between Jersey and Musashi, Musashi is the superior warship."

"Oh please," Jersey rolled her eyes so hard it noticeably slowed the rotation of the planet, "My triple-A's better, my fire-control's better, my DC isn't shit..." she trailed off, "shall I continue?"

While Jersey continued her tirade, Admiral Goto gave Admiral Williams a sidelong glance, "Maybe we should supervise their introduction."

"No argument here,"said Williams, "Commander."

"Yo." Jersey stopped mid-sentence, pivoting around her heel to face her Admiral like nothing had even happened.

"Musashi should be arriving shortly" said Goto, "Perhaps it'd be best if-"

The Admiral's next words were drowned out by the sound of heavy battleship footfalls and the thunderous racket of Kongou bellowing "TEI~TO~KU~" at the very top of her lungs. Jersey couldn't hear a word over the excitable fast-battleship's heralding call, but she swore she saw Goto mouth the words "for fuck's sake..." Williams hung his head, a glimmer of a smirk fighting its way onto his craggy face. Ooyodo just retreated lower beneath her protective barricade of fabulously-expensive electronics.

"Hey! Teitoku!" Kongou exploded the door open, seemingly with nothing more than the power of her bouncy voice. But for once, the hyperactive girl didn't fling herself at Goto like some sort of kiss-fuzed artillery shell. She just stood triumphantly in the doorway, her hands on her hips and her chin thrust into the air. "A new face has arrived! I won't forgive you if you love her more!" The battleship let out a giggle that sounded just a tiny bit more forced than usual, then stepped aside with a whistled fanfare.

Just as promised, in walked what was unmistakeably a Yamato-class super battleship. Jersey'd soaked up decades of naval knowledge in her post-war service, she'd recognize the towering pagoda, the inverted-tripod mast, Imperial Chrysanthemum, and of course the big-ass cannons of a Yamato anywhere. She'd practically memorized every detail of the vaunted warship.

But the girl who bore her spirit... the girl was another thing entirely. She was barely an inch shorter than Jersey, something that made the amazonian American feel decidedly uncomfortable. Her tanned skin and snow-white hair looked like... like whipped cream on pancakes, if she was honest. Jersey was starting to regret skipping breakfast.

Of course, the factor that most caught her eye was the Japanese battleship-girl's colossal... big-ass cannons. Jersey didn't even try to hide her stare. Apparently the biggest damn naval guns ever built translated to the biggest damn rack ever carried. It didn't help that the Japanese battleship wasn't even wearing a bra. Because of course she wasn't. Jersey winced, those things had to hurt in high seas.

"Hmpf," Musashi smirked, waving the 18.1 inch shell clamped between her fingers like it was a fine cigar, "Seems I've kept you waiting." She folded her arms under those colossal cannons of hers, the stupid-ass bandages going taut as she posed, "Musashi has arrived."

Jersey blinked, her own hands migrating to her broad American hips. "Goto," she said, her voice stuck solidly in the 'what the hell is this bullshit' tone her Admiral used so often. "Why the hell-" she turned, making sure her hips were visible from Williams' webcam, "are all your battleships stacked."

Musashi flashed a teasing, cocky smile.

Jersey scowled. "Seriously, why what possible reason could there be?"

"Pagoda masts," said Musashi with a smirk, the bandages she wore as a so-called 'top' pulling tight as she took a breath. Little bitch just had to flaunt her rack, didn't she?

"Best logic I've ever heard," said Goto, taking a few steps back while the two shining triumphs of the Age of the Battleship squared off. Whatever the result... it'd get the forum-goers talking for months. And that's before the inevitable rule 34 started.

"Fine, whatever," said Jersey, throwing her hands up in the air, but making sure they landed right back on her hips. Her 16in/50's might not have the bore size of Musashi's 18.1s, but the American could push almost double the horsepower though her shafts. She could run rings around Musashi even with half her boilers cold, and she'd be damned if she didn't show that off. "Would it kill you to wear a shirt?"

"Nothing comes in," Musashi glanced down, her glasses glittering with a teasking wink, "My size."

"Bullshit," said Jersey, her scowl deepening as she stare down the slightly shorter Japanese battleship. "You're wearing a shirt!" she snapped, waving at the zipped-open jacket Musashi had draped over her shoulders, "Just... you're wearing it like a fucking cape! What the fuck?"

Musashi let out a slight chuckle, "And yet, my armor's still superior."

"In weight, sure," said Jersey, glaring down her slender nose at her Japanese counterpart, "But it's crappy pig iron. Mine-" The battleship lifted her shirt enough to show—both to her opponent and to her Admiral—her solidly-toned abs, "Is proper American steel. And I've got DC that doesn't actively suck."

Goto leaned over towards Williams, "Should we stop them?"

"Nah, they have to get it out of their systems."

"Perhaps that's true," said Musashi, crossing her arms to squeeze her chest in a display of her topweight superiority, "But my guns are the most powerful ever built, and I have the largest-base rangefinder in history-"

"So what, your optics are better," said Jersey, her brows knitting into a dense palisade as her nose crinkled in frustration, "Big fucking deal, I have radar."

"As do I."

"Not tied into your Fire Control Computer you don't," countered Jersey, "Can you shoot while maneuvering? What about through clouds? Or though darkness?"

Musashi made a dismissive little 'humpf' sound before answering. "Perhaps not, but I can take a torpedo hit."

The universe seemed to grind to a halt. Ooyodo retreated lower behind her barricade of technology. Kongou gasped.

"Yeah?" said Jersey, her voice cold as ice as she stared down her Japanese counterpart, "Well I haven't done fuck-all for my country. I sunk a battleship, two cruisers, and twenty-odd destroyers. What about you. Hmm?"

Musashi glanced down, biting her quivering lip to stop it from shaking as she suddenly found the floor entrancing.

"But right now," said Jersey, grabbing the photograph of the Northern Princess and slapping it to Musashi's... surprisingly soft chest. She suddenly understood why the taffies liked to cuddle her that way, "We've got bigger shit to worry about. So let's just man the fuck up, and deal with this afterward, hmm?"

"Deal," said Musashi, peeling the photograph of her comically large chest. "What..." she squinted, adjusting her glasses as she examined the photo in minute detail, "What is this?"

"That's an aircraft carrier," said Jersey, her scowl shifting to a mischievous grin, "She's over a kilometer long, she's got almost two hundred planes, and she's unsinkable."

"And what are we going to do to this carrier," said Musashi, placing the photo back on the table and locking eyes with her American counterpart.

"Sink her."

Musashi scoffed, "And yet you just said she was unsinkable."

"I know." said Jersey. "But,"The battleship reached into her pocket and fished out a pair of shades. Not her usual mirrored aviators, but the American-flag shutter shades she'd borrowed from White, "I'm an American. Impossible is our everyday."

Williams chuckled while Goto and all the Japanese Kanmusu present rolled their eyes in near harmony.

--|--|--

The Yokosuka briefing room always hovered somewhere between controlled chaos and outright anarchy. On the morning of December 4th 2015, it was leaning more towards the latter than the former, due in no small part to the sheer number of Kanmusu assembled for their briefing.

Light Cruiser Tenryuu lounged in the very back row, one foot propped up against the seat back in front of her while she idly sharpened her notched-back sword. Her kindergarden, the adorable destroyer lolis of DesDiv6 sat clustered around her in what could best be described as a "puddle." Hibiki was doing a crossword puzzle, Inazuma was snuggling up against Tenryuu's pleasantly soft tummy while Ikazuki played with her sleepy sister's hair. Akatsuki was 'enjoying' a cup of morning coffee. She'd take a tiny sip, pucker her face, then scurry off to add another cube of sugar when she didn't think anyone was looking.

Across the room, the Akizuki sisters were energetically chatting with the taffies about air-defense. The Japanese twins excitement only grew as they learned about the magic of "VT" fuses, not to mention the experience of growing up with almost two-hundred sisters.

Meanwhile, Kongou and Kirishima were tending to the spread of crumpets, scones, and teas they'd setup next to the base-supplied coffee-and-donut table at the back of the room. No one was quite sure where the pastries came from, or where the finely-appointed table came from either. But given the obvious quality of Kongou's fine British cuisine, no one was willing to question the illogic.

Ryuujou was with them, happily enjoying her scone with butter and a healthy dollop of raspberry jam, even if she did look a tiny bit jealous of the fast-battleships' bustlines.

Akagi, to Ryuujou's glee, had excused herself from the breakfast spread after her twenty-seventh crumpet, and was perusing the more pedestrian donuts selection. She wasn't a huge fan of donuts of any kind, they lacked the home-cooked taste of Kongou's delicacies, but they were pleasantly sweet. Next to the carrier, the battleship New Jersey was gulping down stale coffee like it was the lifeblood of Poseidon himself, at least between donuts. She'd also gotten Akagi involved in a fun new game to pass the time, 'how donuts can you fit in your mouth.'

Akagi was currently winning with six, though Jersey was furiously debating her about weather or not a maple bar "counts as one." Sammy B was trying to mediate, but the little Destroyer Escort was laughing too hard to get a word in edgewise. Fubuki was there, but she was too awe-struck interupt either of her sempais.

A few rows forwards, Mutsu and Naka were discussing the latter's musical career, and the former's wardrobe. As much as the old battleship liked her usual attire—and let's face it, with a body like that, who wouldn't—she wanted to get a little something... seasonal. And perhaps a little sexy as well.

At the front, Musashi flipped though the latest batch of recon photos, a miniature 18.1in shell dangling from the corner of her mouth like a gunslinger's toothpick. Every so often, the battleship would glance up from her work, look around to see if she had sufficient attention, then 'subtly' reposition herself to make sure her main battery was on proper display.

At the front of the room, way to many tiny aviator faeries sat cross-legged on a pair of desks. Or as close to cross-legged as their stubby chibi legs would allow. At any given time, about a third of them were paying attention, another third were energetically discussing tactics by repeating the word 'desu' as many times as needed, while the last had their arms out by their sides and were making airplane noises. The exact ratio, as well as the faeries contained within each group, changed seemingly at random.

And stuck smack-dab in the middle of this slowly-unfolding disaster was the Battleship Nagato herself. The pride of the Imperial Japanese fleet was hunched over in her seat, her half-gloved fingers a cathedral of focus as she struggled with all her powers to tune out the ridiculousness of her surroundings. Her lips were pulled thin as she glared at a spot a few meters behind the projection screen, and her brows where knit together like armor steel.

It didn't help. No matter where she looked, it was impossible to keep both DesDiv6 and the taffies out of her peripheral vision. She could feel it building up inside her, the monster inside of her...Nagamon. The battleship knew she couldn't keep it contained forever, but she was nothing if disciplined. She'd keep her warrior's mask on for now, present a leader's visage to her girls. Then... once her briefing was done, she'd slink back to her room and feed her pet hamster. Feed it, and play with it. Play with it to her heart's content. Just the thought of its tiny paws clambering over her gave the battleship a sense of calm. She could focus now.

And not a moment too soon.

"Attention on deck!" Jersey's barking contralto was soon lost in the shuffle of feet as every kanmusu snapped to attention. Akagi let out a loud glup as she swallowed her donuts, her round face beaming in the kindhearted smile that no one, not even Nagato herself, could stay mad at for long.

"As you were," said Goto, waving at the girls as he mounted the center stage, "Jersey, if you would?"

"Sir," Jersey snapped off a salute, flicked off the lights, and settled down next to the taffies.

Goto got as far as opening his mouth to ask Ooyodo for the next slide before the seemingly precognitive command cruiser smiled at him and flicked a switch on her laptop. A projector flickered to life, throwing up a brilliant image that nearly blinded Goto and caused every destroyer present—even Akatsuki—to burst out laughing.

Until the realized what it was a picture of.

"This," said Goto, "Is an aircraft carrier. She's twelve-hundred meters long-"

"That's just under four thousand feet," whispered Jersey to her taffies.

"She carries upwards of a hundred and fifty aircraft," continued the Admiral, "She's escorted by seven battleships and at least that many light cruisers. And she commands the arctic seaway." Goto paused, resting his hands against the podium as he chose his next words, "We've designated her Northern Princess, and we are going to sink her."

"It's just like the Death star," whispered Johnston, excitedly tugging on Hoel's neckerchief and pointing at the picture. Jersey was quick to shush them with a hiss.

"Sir," said Nagato, "Do we know anything about destroyers?"

"As far as we can tell," said Goto, "Their entire destroyer flotilla was lost attempting to stop the convoy that brought Jersey here."

The taffies excitedly shared high-fives.

"Whu abut-" Akagi stopped and swallowed the donut she'd been working on. "Sorry, what about aircraft? Didn't the convoy encounter heavy bombers?"

"They did," said Goto, "But we haven't seen any evidence of them in the recon photos. It's likley that they as well were expended trying to stop the convoy."

The taffies passed around more high-fives.

"But that still leaves an extensive air wing." Goto motioned for Ooyodo to move to the next slide, a picture of tiny airplanes taxing along the vast carrier's deck. "Analysis suggests something between fifty and eighty Sea Hurricanes, and about that number of Beaufighter torpedo bombers."

Nagato blanched at the thought of that many aircraft darkening the sky, but forced herself to push though. "What about their surface assets?"

Goto nodded for the next slide, "They've got three Nelson-type battleships," he motioned to the floating castle dominating the screen, "And four of the KG-five type. Ooyodo?"

The cruiser nodded, skipping to a slide that showed the whole formation from above.

"The NelRods," Goto waved at a circled group of battleships, "are arranged together in a heavy-division, along with three cruisers. We think they're the primary defensive element."

There was a flurry of pencils as each Kanmusu took notes in their logbook.

"Three of the KGVs, along with three cruisers," Goto motioned to another group of ships, "Are arrayed as a quick-reaction force to counter anything that gets past or around the main force. The last battleship," he tapped a ship utterly dwarfed by the mammoth carrier, "along with the remaining cruisers is attached to the Princess as tight-escort."

The scribbling continued for a few seconds. When it stopped, Goto found himself being stared at by every single Kanmusu in the room.

"I won't lie to you," said Goto, "the Northern Princess is a tough nut to crack. Her armor's forty feet thick, which means the only ships that can guarantee penetrations are Jersey and Musashi."

The two battleships raised their fists, each straining to hold her hand higher.

"Concept of operation is as follows," Goto motioned for Ooyodo to move to the next slide, a breakdown of the order of battle. "We're splitting our surface group into two main thrusts. Task force Hammer, lead by IJN Nagato, will consist of Nagato, Mutsu, and Musashi, with Akizuki and Teruzuki, as air-guard."

The destroyers nodded.

"Task Force Sword, lead by USS New Jersey, will consist of Jersey, Kongou, and Kirishima, with the Taffies attached as air-guard-"

The taffies exchanged fist-pounds.

"-And Tenryuu's DesDiv attached as a fast-attack element."

Tenryuu smirked, drawing the back her freshly-sharpened sword across her forearm. "They better be scared."

"Task Force Shield, lead by IJN Akagi, will consist of Akagi and Ryuujou, with Naka, Sammy, and Fubuki as plane-guards."

Akagi nodded, while Ryuujou offered her own nod that was really closer to a scowl. Naka smiled sweetly, Sammy offered an eager nod that sent her pigtails flying, and Fubuki all but passed out from happiness.

"How much of our decks will be strike planes?" asked Akagi, idly chewing on the end of her pencil.

"None of it," said Goto, ignoring the gasp from his fleet carrier. "You and Ryuujou are to spot a pure CAP deck."

"Nothing but Reppus?" said Akagi, leaning in to make absolutely sure she heard her Admiral correctly.

"Reppus?" Hoel leaned over to Jersey,

"A7Ms," explained the battleships, "'Sams'. Like Zeros, but less sucky."

"Ah, okay."

"Nothing but Reppus, correct," said Goto. "Finally, The US Air force may, I say again may have three B-52-kilo glass-nose conversions to offer us. We won't know for sure until after you put to sea."

"B-52s?" asked Hoel.

"Jet-powered strategic bombers," explained Jersey, "They pack seventy-thousand pounds apiece."

Hoel was momentarily reduced to sheer inarticulate glee.

"Any questions?" asked Goto.

Johnston's hand rocketed into the air. "Me!" she chirped, "MeMeMeMe!"

Jersey sighed, her head lolling forwards to rest on her chest.

"Yes?"

"You should put us with Hammer," said the little sleeveless destroyer, "And the Akizukis with Sword."

"It's because of Musashi's boobs, isn't it?" said Jersey, not bothering to lift her head up from her palm.

"No," Hoel shook her head as fast as she could. "It's because your AA is like... stupid good. You don't need the best AA-defense destroyers in the business, Hammer does. The Akizukis can cover Kongou and Kirishima, you don't really need us."

Jersey narrowed her eyes.

"Okay, and because of Musashi's boobs," said Johnston, "But c'mon! They're so huge! It's like... "

"No," said Jersey, clamping the little destroyer's mouth closed with one hand. "Boss?"

Goto sighed. "The girls have a point... alright, let's switch them up. Anything else?"

The kanmusu uttered a ragged chorus in the negative.

"Alright, get some food and scarves," said the Admiral, "You set sail at thirteen-hundred. Dismissed."
- - - - - - - - -
A/N: There were issues with getting this to paste properly. If there's errors in the formatting, point them out and I'll fix them... at some point.

 

[Interested Party]

Minor commentary!

Her tanned skin and snow-white hair looked like... like whipped cream on pancakes, if she was honest. Jersey was starting to regret skipping breakfast.

Click to shrink...

Sooo... You think she looks delicious, Jersy?~

she turned, making sure her hips were visible from Williams' webcam,

Click to shrink...

Jealous, Jersy?

Musashi made a dismissive little 'humpf' sound before answering. "Perhaps not, but I can take a torpedo hit."

Click to shrink...

*moment of shocked silence* LOW. BLOODY. BLOW.

Everything else: impressive briefing, and lewd-destroyers have reasoning with their lewds.

 

[Skywalker_T-65]

Correction, she can take 19 torpedo hits.

*hides*

 

[Simonbob]

Poor Jersey.

Thrown over for a Larger model.

 

[Old Iron]

Part 35​

"So," Jersey did her best to scowl at the plotting table while still chewing on her most recent bite of muffin. "Do we wanna talk about why you're just now telling me the third-best battleship in the world's on our side?"

Admiral Goto reacted almost on instinct, his tone shifting from the long-suffering-Admiral's monotone to a more guarded, calculated PR dialect. "Sorting Musashi would be politically untenable," he said absentmindedly tugging his uniform smooth, "her appetite is vast, and her utility limited. A battleship has no role in anti-submarine pickets, and she's far too hungry to waste on simple shore patrols."

"Deja-fucking-vu," said Jersey. She knit her brows as she popped another muffin into her mouth. "Lemme guess, her triple-A sucks ass too."

Goto nodded, "If we can't sortie her, we can't upgrade her armaments. And we can't sortie her without upgraded anti-aircraft weaponry."

"Damned if you do, damned if you don't, eh?" Jersey gulped as she swallowed the muffin whole.

"Indeed," said Ooyodo, her appearing above the wall of televisions dominating her desk before popping back like a shore-battery cannon. "And the loss of a Yamato-class super battleship for anything less than an earthshaking cause would cripple the morale of the entire nation."

"It's the same problem we've been facing with Arizona," Wiliams' scowl mirrored Jersey's, although the Admiral had noticeably fewer muffin crumbs piled up on his uniform. "I'm more curious why you rated Musashi as third-best."

"I as well," said Ooyodo, only the crown of her head visible above her parapet of screens.

Jersey smirked, her teeth glinting in a cocky smile. Her smile faded as she realized the answer wasn't as blatantly obvious to her Admiral as it was to her. "Okay..." she said, counting off on her fingers, "Sammy, me, 'sashi." The battleship turned on her heel to face the command cruiser slowly being eaten by her desk, "Duh."

"Sammy?" said Goto, shooting a sideways glance at his American counterpart.

Williams gave a nod of acceptance, "I'll buy it."

"But surely," said Ooyodo, "Between Jersey and Musashi, Musashi is the superior warship."

"Oh please," Jersey rolled her eyes so hard it noticeably slowed the rotation of the planet, "My triple-A's better, my fire-control's better, my DC isn't shit..." she trailed off, "shall I continue?"

While Jersey continued her tirade, Admiral Goto gave Admiral Williams a sidelong glance, "Maybe we should supervise their introduction."

"No argument here,"said Williams, "Commander."

"Yo." Jersey stopped mid-sentence, pivoting around her heel to face her Admiral like nothing had even happened.

"Musashi should be arriving shortly" said Goto, "Perhaps it'd be best if-"

The Admiral's next words were drowned out by the sound of heavy battleship footfalls and the thunderous racket of Kongou bellowing "TEI~TO~KU~" at the very top of her lungs. Jersey couldn't hear a word over the excitable fast-battleship's heralding call, but she swore she saw Goto mouth the words "for fuck's sake..." Williams hung his head, a glimmer of a smirk fighting its way onto his craggy face. Ooyodo just retreated lower beneath her protective barricade of fabulously-expensive electronics.

"Hey! Teitoku!" Kongou exploded the door open, seemingly with nothing more than the power of her bouncy voice. But for once, the hyperactive girl didn't fling herself at Goto like some sort of kiss-fuzed artillery shell. She just stood triumphantly in the doorway, her hands on her hips and her chin thrust into the air. "A new face has arrived! I won't forgive you if you love her more!" The battleship let out a giggle that sounded just a tiny bit more forced than usual, then stepped aside with a whistled fanfare.

Just as promised, in walked what was unmistakeably a Yamato-class super battleship. Jersey'd soaked up decades of naval knowledge in her post-war service, she'd recognize the towering pagoda, the inverted-tripod mast, Imperial Chrysanthemum, and of course the big-ass canons of a Yamato anywhere. She'd practically memorized every detail of the vaunted warship.

But the girl who bore her spirit... the girl was another thing entirely. She was barely an inch shorter than Jersey, something that made the amazonian American feel decidedly uncomfortable. Her tanned skin and snow-white hair looked like... like whipped cream on pancakes, if she was honest. Jersey was starting to regret skipping breakfast.

Of course, the factor that most caught her eye was the Japanese battleship-girl's colossal... big-ass canons. Jersey didn't even try to hide her stare. Apparently the biggest damn naval guns ever built translated to the biggest damn rack ever carried. It didn't help that the Japanese battleship wasn't even wearing a bra. Because of course she wasn't. Jersey winced, those things had to hurt in high seas.

"Hmpf," Musashi smirked, waving the 18.1 inch shell clamped between her fingers like it was a fine cigar, "Seems I've kept you waiting." She folded her arms under those colossal cannons of hers, the stupid-ass bandages going taut as she posed, "Musashi has arrived."

Jersey blinked, her own hands migrating to her broad American hips. "Goto," she said, her voice stuck solidly in the 'what the hell is this bullshit' tone her Admiral used so often. "Why the hell-" she turned, making sure her hips were visible from Williams' webcam, "are all your battleships stacked."

Musashi flashed a teasing, cocky smile.

Jersey scowled. "Seriously, why what possible reason could there be?"

"Pagoda masts," said Musashi with a smirk, the bandages she wore as a so-called 'top' pulling tight as she took a breath. Little bitch just had to flaunt her rack, didn't she?

"Best logic I've ever heard," said Goto, taking a few steps back while the two shining triumphs of the Age of the Battleship squared off. Whatever the result... it'd get the forum-goers talking for months. And that's before the inevitable rule 34 started.

"Fine, whatever," said Jersey, throwing her hands up in the air, but making sure they landed right back on her hips. Her 16in/50's might not have the bore size of Musashi's 18.1s, but the American could push almost double the horsepower though her shafts. She could run rings around Musashi even with half her boilers cold, and she'd be damned if she didn't show that off. "Would it kill you to wear a shirt?"

"Nothing comes in," Musashi glanced down, her glasses glittering with a teasking wink, "My size."

"Bullshit," said Jersey, her scowl deepening as she stare down the slightly shorter Japanese battleship. "You're wearing shirt!" she snapped, waving at the zipped-open jacket Musashi had draped over her shoulders, "Just... you're wearing it like a fucking cape! What the fuck?"

Musashi let out a slight chuckle, "And yet, my armor's still superior."

"In weight, sure," said Jersey, glaring down her slender nose at her Japanese counterpart, "But it's crappy pig iron. Mine-" The battleship lifted her shirt enough to show—both to her opponent and to her Admiral—her solidly-toned abs, "Is proper American steel. And I've got DC that doesn't actively suck."

Goto leaned over towards Williams, "Should we stop them?"

"Nah, they have to get it out of their systems."

"Perhaps that's true," said Musashi, crossing her arms to squeeze her chest in a display of her topweight superiority, "But my guns are the most powerful ever built, and I have the largest-base rangefinder in history-"

"So what, your optics are better," said Jersey, her brows knitting into a dense palisade as her nose crinkled in frustration, "Big fucking deal, I have radar."

"As do I."

"Not tied into your Fire Control Computer you don't," countered Jersey, "Can you shoot while maneuvering? What about through clouds? Or though darkness?"

Musashi made a dismissive little 'humpf' sound before answering. "Perhaps not, but I can take a torpedo hit."

The universe seemed to grind to a halt. Ooyodo retreated lower behind her barricade of technology. Kongou gasped.

"Yeah?" said Jersey, her voice cold as ice as she stared down her Japanese counterpart, "Well I haven't done fuck-all for my country. I sunk a battleship, two cruisers, and twenty-odd destroyers. What about you. Hmm?"

Musashi glanced down, biting her quivering lip to stop it from shaking as she suddenly found the floor entrancing.

"But right now," said Jersey, grabbing the photograph of the Northern Princess and slapping it to Musashi's... surprisingly soft chest. She suddenly understood why the taffies liked to cuddle her that way, "We've got bigger shit to worry about. So let's just man the fuck up, and deal with this afterward, hmm?"

"Deal," said Musashi, peeling the photograph of her comically large chest. "What..." she squinted, adjusting her glasses as she examined the photo in minute detail, "What is this?"

"That's an aircraft carrier," said Jersey, her scowl shifting to a mischievous grin, "She's over a kilometer long, she's got almost two hundred planes, and she's unsinkable."

"And what are we going to do to this carrier," said Musashi, placing the photo back on the table and locking eyes with her American counterpart.

"Sink her."

Musashi scoffed, "And yet you just said she was unsinkable."

"I know." said Jersey. "But,"The battleship reached into her pocket and fished out a pair of shades. Not her usual mirrored aviators, but the American-flag shutter shades she'd borrowed from White, "I'm an American. Impossible is our everyday."

Williams chuckled while Goto and all the Japanese Kanmusu present rolled their eyes in near harmony.

--|--|--

The Yokosuka briefing room always hovered somewhere between controlled chaos and outright anarchy. On the morning of December 4th 2015, it was leaning more towards the latter than the former, due in no small part to the sheer number of Kanmusu assembled for their briefing.

Light Cruiser Tenryuu lounged in the very back row, one foot propped up against the seat back in front of her while she idly sharpened her notched-back sword. Her kindergarden, the adorable destroyer lolis of DesDiv6 sat clustered around her in what could best be described as a "puddle." Hibiki was doing a crossword puzzle, Inazuma was snuggling up against Tenryuu's pleasantly soft tummy while Ikazuki played with her sleepy sister's hair. Akatsuki was 'enjoying' a cup of morning coffee. She'd take a tiny sip, pucker her face, then scurry off to add another cube of sugar when she didn't think anyone was looking.

Across the room, the Akizuki sisters were energetically chatting with the taffies about air-defense. The Japanese twins excitement only grew as they learned about the magic of "VT" fuses, not to mention the experience of growing up with almost two-hundred sisters.

Meanwhile, Kongou and Kirishima tending to the spread of crumpets, scones, and teas they'd setup next to the base-supplied coffee-and-donut table at the back of the room. No one was quite sure where the pastries came from, or where the finely-appointed table came from either. But given the obvious quality of Kongou's fine British cuisine, no one was willing to question the illogical.

Ryuujou was with them, happily enjoying her scone with butter and a healthy dollop of raspberry jam, even if she did look a tiny bit jealous of the fast-battleships' bustlines.

Akagi, to Ryuujou's glee, had excused herself from the breakfast spread after her twenty-seventh crumpet, and was perusing the more pedestrian donuts selection. She wasn't a huge fan of donuts of any kind, they lacked the home-cooked taste of Kongou's delicacies, but they were pleasantly sweet. Next to the carrier, the battleship New Jersey was gulping down stale coffee like it was the lifeblood of Poseidon himself, at least between donuts. She'd also gotten Akagi involved in a fun new game to pass the time, 'how donuts can you fit in your mouth.'

Akagi was currently winning with six, though Jersey was furiously debating her about weather or not a maple bar "counts as one." Sammy B was trying to mediate, but the little Destroyer Escort was laughing too hard to get a word in edgewise. Fubuki was there, but she was too awe-struck interupt either of her sempais.

A few rows forwards, Mutsu and Naka were discussing the latter's musical career, and the former's wardrobe. As much as the old battleship liked her usual attire—and let's face it, with a body like that, who wouldn't—she wanted to get a little something... seasonal. And perhaps a little sexy as well.

At the front, Musashi flipped though the latest batch of recon photos, a miniature 18.1in shell dangling from the corner of her mouth like a gunslinger's toothpick. Every so often, the battleship would glance up from her work, look around to see if she had sufficient attention, then 'subtly' reposition herself to make sure her main battery was on proper display.

At the front of the room, way to many tiny aviator faeries sat cross-legged on a pair of desks. Or as close to cross-legged as their stubby chibi legs would allow. At any given time, about a third of them were paying attention, another third were energetically discussing tactics by repeating the word 'desu' as many times as needed, while the last had their arms out by their sides and were making airplane noises. The exact ratio, as well as the faeries contained within each group, changed seemingly at random.

And stuck smack-dab in the middle of this slowly-unfolding disaster was the Battleship Nagato herself. The pride of the Imperial Japanese fleet was hunched over in her seat, her half-gloved fingers a cathedral of focus as she struggled with all her powers to tune out the ridiculousness of her surroundings. Her lips were pulled thin as she glared at a spot a few meters behind the projection screen, and her brows where knit together like armor steel.

It didn't help. No matter where she looked, it was impossible to keep both DesDiv6 and the taffies out of her peripheral vision. She could feel it building up inside her, the monster inside of her...Nagamon. The battleship knew she couldn't keep it contained forever, but she was nothing if disciplined. She'd keep her warrior's mask on for now, present a leader's visage to her girls. Then... once her briefing was done, she'd slink back to her room and feed her pet hamster. Feed it, and play with it. Play with it to her heart's content. Just the thought of its tiny paws clambering over her gave the battleship a sense of calm. She could focus now.

And not a moment too soon.

"Attention on deck!" Jersey's barking contralto was soon lost in the shuffle of feet as every kanmusu snapped to attention. Akagi let out a loud glup as she swallowed her donuts, her round face beaming in the kindhearted smile that no one, not even Nagato herself, could stay mad at for long.

"As you were," said Goto, waving at the girls as he mounted the center stage, "Jersey, if you would?"

"Sir," Jersey snapped off a salute, flicked off the lights, and settled down next to the taffies.

Goto got as far as opening his mouth to ask Ooyodo for the next slide before the seemingly precognitive command cruiser smiled at him and flicked a switch on her laptop. A projector flickered to life, throwing up a brilliant image that nearly blinded Goto and caused every destroyer present—even Akatsuki—to burst out laughing.

Until the realized what it was a picture of.

"This," said Goto, "Is an aircraft carrier. She's twelve-hundred meters long-"

"That's just under four thousand feet," whispered Jersey to her taffies.

"She carries upwards of a hundred and fifty aircraft," continued the Admiral, "She's escorted by seven battleships and at least that many light cruisers. And she commands the arctic seaway." Goto paused, resting his hands against the podium as he chose his next words, "We've designated her Northern Princess, and we are going to sink her."

"It's just like the Death star," whispered Johnston, excitedly tugging on Hoel's neckerchief and pointing at the picture. Jersey was quick to shush them with a hiss.

"Sir," said Nagato, "Do we know anything about destroyers?"

"As far as we can tell," said Goto, "Their entire destroyer flotilla was lost attempting to stop the convoy that brought Jersey here."

The taffies excitedly shared high-fives.

"Whu abut-" Akagi stopped and swallowed the donut she'd been working on. "Sorry, what about aircraft? Didn't the convoy encounter heavy bombers?"

"They did," said Goto, "But we haven't seen any evidence of them in the recon photos. It's likley that they as well were expended trying to stop the convoy."

The taffies passed around more high-fives.

"But that still leaves an extensive air wing." Goto motioned for Ooyodo to move to the next slide, a picture of tiny airplanes taxing along the vast carrier's deck. "Analysis suggests something between fifty and eighty Sea Hurricanes, and about that number of Beaufighter torpedo bombers."

Nagato blanched at the thought of that many aircraft darkening the sky, but forced herself to push though. "What about their surface assets?"

Goto nodded for the next slide, "They've got three Nelson-type battleships," he motioned to the floating castle dominating the screen, "And four of the KG-five type. Ooyodo?"

The cruiser nodded, skipping to a slide that showed the whole formation from above.

"The NelRods," Goto waved at a circled group of battleships, "are arranged together in a heavy-division, along with three cruisers. We think they're the primary defensive element."

There was a flurry of pencils as each Kanmusu took notes in their logbook.

"Three of the KGVs, along with three cruisers," Goto motioned to another group of ships, "Are arrayed as a quick-reaction force to counter anything that gets past or around the main force. The last battleship," he tapped a ship utterly dwarfed by the mammoth carrier, "along with the remaining cruisers is attached to the Princess as tight-escort."

The scribbling continued for a few seconds. When it stopped, Goto found himself being stared at by every single Kanmusu in the room.

"I won't lie to you," said Goto, "the Northern Princess is a tough nut to crack. Her armor's forty feet thick, which means the only ships that can guarantee penetrations are Jersey and Musashi."

The two battleships raised their fists, each straining to hold her hand higher.

"Concept of operation is as follows," Goto motioned for Ooyodo to move to the next slide, a breakdown of the order of battle. "We're splitting our surface group into two main thrusts. Task force Hammer, lead by IJN Nagato, will consist of Nagato, Mutsu, and Musashi, with Akizuki and Teruzuki, as air-guard."

The destroyers nodded.

"Task Force Sword, lead by USS New Jersey, will consist of Jersey, Kongou, and Kirishima, with the Taffies attached as air-guard-"

The taffies exchanged fist-pounds.

"-And Tenryuu's DesDiv attached as a fast-attack element."

Tenryuu smirked, drawing the back her freshly-sharpened sword across her forearm. "They better be scared."

"Task Force Shield, lead by IJN Akagi, will consist of Akagi and Ryuujou, with Naka, Sammy, and Fubuki as plane-guards."

Akagi nodded, while Ryuujou offered her own nod that was really closer to a scowl. Naka smiled sweetly, Sammy offered an eager nod that sent her pigtails flying, and Fubuki all but passed out from happiness.

"How much of our decks will be strike planes?" asked Akagi, idly chewing on the end of her pencil.

"None of it," said Goto, ignoring the gasp from his fleet carrier. "You and Ryuujou are to spot a pure CAP deck."

"Nothing but Reppus?" said Akagi, leaning in to make absolutely sure she heard her Admiral correctly.

"Reppus?" Hoel leaned over to Jersey,

"A7Ms," explained the battleships, "'Sams'. Like Zeros, but less sucky."

"Ah, okay."

"Nothing but Reppus, correct," said Goto. "Finally, The US Air force may, I say again may have three B-52-kilo glass-nose conversions to offer us. We won't know for sure until after you put to sea."

"B-52s?" asked Hoel.

"Jet-powered strategic bombers," explained Jersey, "They pack seventy-thousand pounds apiece."

Hoel was momentarily reduced to sheer inarticulate glee.

"Any questions?" asked Goto.

Johnston's hand rocketed into the air. "Me!" she chirped, "MeMeMeMe!"

Jersey sighed, her head lolling forwards to rest on her chest.

"Yes?"

"You should put us with Hammer," said the little sleeveless destroyer, "And the Akizukis with Sword."

"It's because of Musashi's boobs, isn't it?" said Jersey, not bothering to lift her head up from her palm.

"No," Hoel shook her head as fast as she could. "It's because your AA is like... stupid good. You don't need the best AA-defense destroyers in the business, Hammer does. The Akizukis can cover Kongou and Kirishima, you don't really need us."

Jersey narrowed her eyes.

"Okay, and because of Musashi's boobs," said Johnston, "But c'mon! They're so huge! It's like... "

"No," said Jersey, clamping the little destroyer's mouth closed with one hand. "Boss?"

Goto sighed. "The girls have a point... alright, let's switch them up. Anything else?"

The kanmusu uttered a ragged chorus in the negative.

"Alright, get some food and scarves," said the Admiral, "You set sail at thirteen-hundred. Dismissed."
- - - - - - - - -
A/N: There were issues with getting this to paste properly. If there's errors in the formatting, point them out and I'll fix them... at some point.

Click to shrink...

First off, the interaction between Jersey and Musashi was awesome. The back and forth was great and they've got Vitriolic Best Bugs written all over them. If they manage to make it out of this fustercluck, that is. And Musashi has reason to be proud for all she has going, now she just needs to prove she's more than show. Especially if she wants to live up to the reputation, and Jersey's track record. I'd say measure up, but... Certain elements are... superior that others for each.

And the shades cracked me up. XD

As for the leadup to the briefing. That was just as great. Everyone's just having a ball and relaxing before the big event. It really helped articulate that they're people as much as they are warships. Poor Nagato though. I mean. That is some serious willpower to keep it together in front of everyone with all the madness and the DD's running around. And the pet hamster is just perfect for her. :3

I would almost pay to see Jersey and Akagi square off in a donut eating contest like that. Seriously, it is just so absolutely them it's hilarious. And I'd eat a hundred of Kongou's scones if I could. I mean, wouldn't you? They're scones. Made by Kongou.

...Mutsu, what is this about seasonal wear?

The briefing itself was very well done and I'm looking forward to seeing how the battle will turn out. The battle groups are set and of a very good composition. Good call there with the AA, Johnston. You'll definitely be of more use to Hammer. And capable of being in close proximity to Musashi's guns. Very close proximity.

And given how Hoppo really, really wants Reppu I daresay the loadout for the CAP is a good choice. If teasing for the lass. XD

 

[landcollector]

Poor Jersey.

Thrown over for a Larger model.

Click to shrink...

Eh. Johnston'll get used to Musashi soon enough and gravitate back towards Jersey, I bet.

 

[Always Late]

"If we can't sortie her, we can't upgrade her armaments. And we can't sortie her without upgraded anti-aircraft weaponry."

Click to shrink...

Excuses, excuses. You lot just don't have the guts to put her in action for political reasons. Resources is one thing, and is understandable, but don't piss in peoples' ears and tell them it's raining.

"But surely," said Ooyodo, "Between Jersey and Musashi, Musashi is the superior warship."

Click to shrink...

Ooyodo, you're supposed to be the smart one. It's Kaga who's the 'superior Nippon steel' patriot.

Her tanned skin and snow-white hair looked like... like whipped cream on pancakes, if she was honest.

Click to shrink...

Don't forget the fox-ear cowlicks.

Jersey blinked, her own hands migrating to her broad American hips. "Goto," she said, her voice stuck solidly in the 'what the hell is this bullshit' tone her Admiral used so often. "Why the hell-" she turned, making sure her hips were visible from Williams' webcam, "are all your battleships stacked."

Click to shrink...

You're complaining about cup size when you have abs and legs like yours? You're either tsun-tsun for Musashi, or you're suffering brain damage from a concussion.

"Pagoda masts," said Musashi with a smirk, the bandages she wore as a so-called 'top' pulling tight as she took a breath. Little bitch just had to flaunt her rack, didn't she?

"Best logic I've ever heard," said Goto

Click to shrink...

I do that, yet I'm smiling.

Whatever the result... it'd get the forum-goers talking for months. And that's before the inevitable rule 34 started.

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How meta of you JMPer. And utterly, utterly right.

"You're wearing a shirt!"

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missing an 'a'

"Not tied into your Fire Control Computer you don't," countered Jersey, "Can you shoot while maneuvering? What about through clouds? Or though darkness?"

Musashi made a dismissive little 'humpf' sound before answering. "Perhaps not, but I can take a torpedo hit."

Click to shrink...

Musashi. Get slapped.

Next to the carrier, the battleship New Jersey was gulping down stale coffee like it was the lifeblood of Poseidon himself, at least between donuts. She'd also gotten Akagi involved in a fun new game to pass the time, 'how donuts can you fit in your mouth.

Click to shrink...

:lol

Akagi was currently winning with six, though Jersey was furiously debating her about weather or not a maple bar "counts as one." Sammy B was trying to mediate, but the little Destroyer Escort was laughing too hard to get a word in edgewise. Fubuki was there, but she was too awe-struck interupt either of her sempais.

Click to shrink...

And stuck smack-dab in the middle of this slowly-unfolding disaster was the Battleship Nagato herself. The pride of the Imperial Japanese fleet was hunched over in her seat, her half-gloved fingers a cathedral of focus as she struggled with all her powers to tune out the ridiculousness of her surroundings. Her lips were pulled thin as she glared at a spot a few meters behind the projection screen, and her brows where knit together like armor steel.

It didn't help. No matter where she looked, it was impossible to keep both DesDiv6 and the taffies out of her peripheral vision. She could feel it building up inside her, the monster inside of her...Nagamon.

Click to shrink...

If she's having a hard time now, just wait until Nagato sees Hoppo-chan. If you've been to Ad Astra per Aspera quest, you know what I'm talking about, right Nuker?

"But that still leaves an extensive air wing." Goto motioned for Ooyodo to move to the next slide, a picture of tiny airplanes taxing along the vast carrier's deck. "Analysis suggests something between fifty and eighty Sea Hurricanes, and about that number of Beaufighter torpedo bombers."

Click to shrink...

Ouch. The Hurricane was the aircraft that actually won the Battle of Britain, and the Beaufighter's an utterly lethal aircraft. Carries a ludicrous amount of MGs and cannons, can take a pounding, hauls lots of ordinance, and will even dogfight in a pinch.

"None of it," said Goto, ignoring the gasp from his fleet carrier. "You and Ryuujou are to spot a pure CAP deck."

"Nothing but Reppus?" said Akagi, leaning in to make absolutely sure she heard her Admiral correctly.

Click to shrink...

And I already know how the battle's going to go down: every aircraft will fly to attack the A7Ms, because Hoppo lives her some Reppus, leaving the surface vessels free to duel each other.

"B-52s?" asked Hoel.

"Jet-powered strategic bombers," explained Jersey, "They pack seventy-thousand pounds apiece."

Hoel was momentarily reduced to sheer inarticulate glee.

Click to shrink...

Heh. She should visit Fairborn, Ohio. I've got an uncle who flew a BUFF with SAC back in the day, and we're less than 15 mins from the Air Force Museum. They got plenty of stuff for Hoel to enjoy, including one example of all the USAF's big bombers. Maybe bring the carrier girls, they can get something out of it too.

 

[wildredlifer]

Ad Astra Per Astra quest LINK please?

 

[landcollector]

Ad Astra Per Astra quest LINK please?

Click to shrink...

Ad Astra per Aspera (A Kantai Collection/Mass Effect Quest; No Shepard, you are the spaceship)

 

[wildredlifer]

thanks.

 

[Always Late]

Ad Astra Per Astra quest LINK please?

Click to shrink...

Ad Astra per Aspera (A Kantai Collection/Mass Effect Quest; No Shepard, you are the spaceship)

Click to shrink...

thanks.

Click to shrink...

Hydra: "Just as planned, minion."
Hydra, get off my computer.
"Nope."

 

[Whiskey Golf]

Ah, Nagamon.

Also @theJMPer the Japanese never used the IJN prefix when referring to their ships. In fact they didn't use prefixes at all until the JMSDF was a thing. That's a little SOD breaking; Japanese sources all refer to their ships by name, no prefixes. Goto wouldn't use any prefixes as well.

 

[Simonbob]

You know, I've worked out the best way to deal with our icy foe.

It just needs a bunker buster nuke, that's all.

 

[theJMPer]

Sooo... You think she looks delicious, Jersy?~

Click to shrink...

Jersey: Hell yeah! She might not have abs like mine, but they're still pretty nice. And that rack! Mmm! It's like... boobs shouldn't be that massive and that damn perky at the same time, but hers are. And of course she flaunts around with them all on display like that... You better not tell that bitch I said any of that, though.

Jealous, Jersy?

Click to shrink...

Jersey: Wouldn't you be? LOOK AT HER TITTIES!

*moment of shocked silence* LOW. BLOODY. BLOW.

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Yeah... what can I say? The two really don't like eachother.

Eh. Johnston'll get used to Musashi soon enough and gravitate back towards Jersey, I bet.

Click to shrink...

Musashi might be hot, but Jersey's still her momboat.

Ooyodo, you're supposed to be the smart one. It's Kaga who's the 'superior Nippon steel' patriot.

Click to shrink...

She's the smart one, but she's also an Imperial Japanese Warship. She looks at Yamato's superior main battery and armor and thinks "That must make her a better warship," and doesn't quite factor in Jersey's better AA and computers.

You're complaining about cup size when you have abs and legs like yours? You're either tsun-tsun for Musashi, or you're suffering brain damage from a concussion.

Click to shrink...

Jersey: Okay, fine. My legs are amazing and my abs are to die for (which they are). But... boobies.

Ah, Nagamon.

Also @theJMPer the Japanese never used the IJN prefix when referring to their ships. In fact they didn't use prefixes at all until the JMSDF was a thing. That's a little SOD breaking; Japanese sources all refer to their ships by name, no prefixes. Goto wouldn't use any prefixes as well.

Click to shrink...

There's a good number of JMSDF ships named after WWII warships, like the JDS Kaga heli-carrier. To avoid confusion, returned Kanmusu are given "IJN" prefixes. That's my story and I'm sticking with it.

 

[Always Late]

Jersey: Okay, fine. My legs are amazing and my abs are to die for (which they are). But... boobies.

Click to shrink...

So you've always been a sucker for big boobs? Whatever, just keep it within the limits of the CC, you two.

 

[obssesednuker]

*putting Jersashi into gear*

I spot an Akagi... but I take it Kaga's still on reserve? I noticed White is staying out (which makes sense) so she still training with her?

 

[Old Iron]

*putting Jersashi into gear*

Click to shrink...

IT BEGINS.

...Again. XD

 

[Harry Leferts]

IT BEGINS.

...Again. XD

Click to shrink...

Shush, I'm still waiting for the Arizona mistletoe incident from you.

 

[Ryand-Smith]

Its less the Death Star than a Super Star Destroyer (unless it has a superlaser, that would be garbage). Musashi is something else. I hope you all can damage its flight deck, because something that massive won't go down without a fight. Another good chapter.

 

[theJMPer]

Shush, I'm still waiting for the Arizona mistletoe incident from you.

Click to shrink...

We all are. Give it to us or Johnston bites it!

Its less the Death Star than a Super Star Destroyer (unless it has a superlaser, that would be garbage). Musashi is something else. I hope you all can damage its flight deck, because something that massive won't go down without a fight. Another good chapter.

Click to shrink...

Yeah, but the SSD only showed up in Episode V, the Taffies haven't seen that one yet.

 

[Old Iron]

Shush, I'm still waiting for the Arizona mistletoe incident from you.

Click to shrink...

We all are. Give it to us or Johnston bites it!

Click to shrink...

I'm working on it! There are too many distractions!

Please, spare Johnston!

 

[Icywinter]

taking a few steps back while the two shining triumphs of the Age of the Battleship squared off. Whatever the result... it'd get the forum-goers talking for months. And that's before the inevitable rule 34 started.

Click to shrink...

>San Francisco cackles loudly and adjusts her glasses before initiating Project SYNCHRONIZATION-DD
>She whips off her glasses and smiles directly into the camera.

San Francisco : Keikaku doori.

 

[Harry Leferts]

>San Francisco cackles loudly and adjusts her glasses before initiating Project SYNCHRONIZATION-DD
>She whips off her glasses and smiles directly into the camera.

San Francisco : Keikaku doori.

Click to shrink...

Acadia: *Hits SanFran with a ping pong ball* Bad shipgirl. *Runs*

 

[Exterminatus]

Just as promised, in walked what was unmistakeably a Yamato-class super battleship. Jersey'd soaked up decades of naval knowledge in her post-war service, she'd recognize the towering pagoda, the inverted-tripod mast, Imperial Chrysanthemum, and of course the big-ass canons of a Yamato anywhere. She'd practically memorized every detail of the vaunted warship.

Click to shrink...

Of course, the factor that most caught her eye was the Japanese battleship-girl's colossal... big-ass canons.

Click to shrink...

Jersey, 18-inch guns are not holy books.

Although I see you appreciate Musashi's fuel tanks.