How Ba-a-a-ad Can I Be? (A Paw Patrol SUPERVILLAIN Quest (Yes, Really))

Vote's closed. Just did the rolls and my goodness are they low and mediocre. No fails, just... they're so mediocre.

January 1, 2015, Adventure Bay.

It's been two years since you'd last seen the place, and it still looked like the same small, idyllic town when you'd been a child, only more so with the new landmarks, people, and other developments.

Case in point, the humongous statue of a golden chicken that was standing in front of the town hall. When you, understandably befuddled, asked a passing man what the heck the statue was about, he told you that the mayor had decided to create a statue honoring her pet chicken, Chickaletta.

...You immediately came to the conclusion that Mayor Goodway was the most devious and ingenious political schemer since Machiavelli. How else could you explain the fact that someone like her got into power? By means which do not include voter fraud, blackmail, or any other crime? Preposterous!

These absolutely important thought consumed you as you tossed and turned in your bed trying to solve them. Instead of, you know, doing something productive.

Rolling off of your bed, you let out a big old sigh as you grab Presto, the favorite of your hand puppets, and think about what your future in Adventure Bay holds. Being a supervillain is part of that, obviously, but living in an old, rented house while having to worry about getting your payment to the landlord on time for the rest of your life... it's not part of that.

Actually, when you think about it, besides being a supervillain... you don't know what to do with your life. You don't have any friends here, your parents are on the other side of the ocean, you'll run out of money to pay rent with in ten months, you're life is a complete and utter mess.

This won't stand. "I am going to make this work," You quietly promise to yourself as you lovingly stroke Presto's felt ears, the amateur sewing holding even after seven years. "I swear it, Presto, and you'll be right there with me."

"Of course, my assistant," He finally speaks up, his cocky, showman accent breaking all solemnity in the room. "After all, what kind of good boss doesn't take care of his employees?"

You smile fondly.

"One that isn't you, Presto."

Living Situation:

You live in a rented house that you could potentially buy for yourself in the future.

You currently have $20,000 in cold, hard currency, with some more in illiquid assets. You'll have to pay $2,000 in rent every month, so you'll need to get some sustainable income by the fifth turn at the very least.

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-[X] Picking Pockets: You're not too short on funds right now, but it'd be useful to get some extra money just-in-case. You and your Allays could probably pick enough pockets that you'd have enough money to pay the bills and stuff. DC: 10/30/50/70/90

1D100+10+5 = 29+10+5 = 44

You and your Allay's had done a decent job this month purloining purses, pinching pennies, swiping souvernirs, and etcetera. It helped that your very sneaky Allays could distract your victims, giving you an opening to swipe their stuff, before the both of you sneaked away without anyone noticing.

At the end of the month, you gathered all of the illegal gains and goodies you and your Allays had collected in order to determine how effective your pickpocketing exploits had been. It wasn't enough money to pay the rent, but it's enough to warrant a cookie for all your Allays. They need it to, after the failure that was finding things legally.

Rewards:

+$1,000

+10 Notoriety. People have noticed that their pockets and bags have suddenly lost weight and, upon furhter inspection, their valuables. It's not enough to draw the full attention of the Paw Patrol, but it is something they'll note for the future.

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-[X] Burglary for Beginners: You've shoplifted a few times here and there when needed, but you've never really burglarized a building before. DC: 30/50/70

1D100+10+5 = 44+10+5 = 59

You'd found it surprisingly easy to break into a building without being noticed. While your Allays would go in to disable the alarms, you would be hidden outside looking back over your notebook, rereading the list of what you planned to steal and the order in which you would steal them for maxmium efficiency. Then, as soon as the Allays gave the signal, you pulled your ski mask over your face and rushed into the building, swiped everything you'd written down, then hurried out as fast as you had rushed in without anyone being the wiser.

This month, you'd chosen to break into only two buildings, a quaint little apartment and an antique store, so as to keep from attracting too much attention from the Paw Patrol. You'd gotten a buttload of money, which you were really happy about, as well as a few stolen goods you pawned off to an ot-of-town fence. But you'd also grabbed something from the antique store you hadn't planned on stealing. But it had attracted your attention, and for some reason, you had decided that was enough reason to go off schedule and snatch it.

You sighed and admonished yourself for your impulsiveness before deciding to just give the item a lookover and see if it had any value to it. Might as well, right? If it wasn't, you could probably scam some tourist into paying you five bucks for it.

1D100+10 = 90+10 = Art!100 (...The FRI-)

Critical Roll I: 31+10 = 41

You could do nothing but stare at the book in your hand, your jaw slack with overwhelming shock. You pinched youself twice to confirm this wasn't a dream; then, you started hyperventilating.

In your hands was a completely intact grimoire that comprehensively categorized multiple types of magical animals and plants and thoroughly explained the process of how to summon these beasts as minions and familiars. There were pages that went on about griffons

"Bee-BRah-HuH?!?!"

Only gibberish came out of your mouth as you struggled to comprehend the situation. What the hell was something this powerful and rare doing in a frickin' antique shop that was older than dust and ugleir than sin?!

...Now that you think about it, it's actually pretty cliche for a powerful magical artifact to end up in a character's hands after they sneak into a run-down shop run by a kindly old man who had a secret and dark past.

The last part wasn't too accurate as the store was actually run by a middle-aged woman with two kids, but details schmetails. Now, how to take advantage of this sudden windfall...

Rewards:

+$2,500

A Comprehensive Guide on the Care and Eccentricities of Magical Fauna and Flora: A powerful grimoire that also counts as an encyclopedia for magical creatures and plants. Opens up options to summon Magical Familiars and Minions. +10 to rolls for summoning Familiars and Minions, and a +10 to rolls when trying to identify Magical Fauna and Flora.

+30 Notoriety. Adventure Bay now knows there's a burglar loose, and that said burglar has just broken into two buildings over a single month. The Paw Patrol are on the case, but they aren't able to make any progress due to a lack of evidence.

+5 Popularity. Watchers of the show now know there's a burglar loose in Adventure Bay, but until you show yourself as your Villain Persona, it's gonna be relegated to minor fan theories and such. Some even think that this'll just be a one-off hook in one episode, never to be heard from again.

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-[X] Internet's Your Friend: It's been two years since you left Adventure Bay, and lots of things have changed. Yes, that does also include the giant golden statue of the mayor's pet chicken. You might want to check what's gone on since you've been gone, just so that you don't run into any... unforeseen circumstances. DC: 0

1D100 = 44

Your searching on the internet has netted you some pretty good information. Not as much has changed in the Adventure Bay as you'd previously thought, but there have definitely been some major changes here and there.

Besides the golden chicken statue, there had been some new residences built on the nearby hills, there have been some new laws passed regarding taxes and other stuff, and Captain Horatio Turbot had a newly-discovered bug named after him. Huh, so he did have

Looking up the Paw Patrol specifically, you were surprised to learn that they had gained some new official members. Everest, who lived at Jake's Cabin up at the ski mountain, who specialized in snow rescue; and Tracker, who lived in the Amazon with semi-famous explorer Carlos Romero, who specialized in scouting and jungle rescue.

Searching more, you found that the Paw Patrol had now obtained an 18-wheeler truck, called the Paw Patroller, that served as a mobile Lookout when the Paw Patrol were operating outside of Adventure Bay. Looking at the pictures depicting the Paw Patroller, you had to admit that it was pretty cool. You also found something about Air Patrol and-

Wait... They can fly now?!?!

Rewards:

You gain some new information on what's been happening in Adventure Bay while you were gone, as well as some helpful info on the Paw Patrol, including the fact that they can fly.

You are not amused by this fact.

Gain access to a Rumor Mill every two turns.

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-[X] Meet Your New Neighbors: You should probably take the time to meet the people you're going to be living with , make sure nothing stupid causes conflict between you and them. Though, it does involve... socializing. Brrrr. DC: 15

1D100 = 40

You were not that good at talking to strangers, and you knew that far too well. The many times you had hid behind your mother's legs when she would introduce you to strangers had taught you that much.

So, when the time came to meet your new neighbors, you resolved to be polite but use as few words as possible, in order to keep you from embarrassing yourself. As such, it came as a major shock to you when you didn't bumble and frumble when meeting your new neighbors. Heck, it seemed like some people actually enjoyed talking with you. The idea makes you feel fuzzy inside

One such person was Yumi Pearson, a local farmer you'd met while she was dropping off her produce at Mr. Porter's Restaurant. You had hesitantly tried to strike up a conversation about how delicious her fruits and veggies liked and had been ecstatic when she'd began to enthusiastically talk in return of how she used special fertilizer.

From there, the two of you had happily talked about farming and gardening before the conversation drifted towards your personal lives. While you weren't too forthcoming about yourself, you had mentioned that you had somewhat of an interest in martial arts but couldn't find a decent instructor. You also hadn't mentioned just why you needed to be able to fight. "I'm a supervillain and I need to be able to beat up the Paw Patrol" isn't exactly the best thing to bring up in a conversation, after all.

Back to the conversation, Yumi's smile had brightened when she'd heard that, and she eagerly explained to you that she knew some Kung Fu and other Martial Arts. When you asked her if she could teach you, she gave you her number and told you to visit any time you wanted.

As you walked back home with Yumi's number in your hand, you realized that you might actually have a friend now, other than your puppets and minions of course.

It felt... nice.

Rewards:

You've made a decent impression on your neighbors and have avoided making a social fool out of yourself.

You've also met Farmer Yumi Pearson, a local farmer who also knows some martial arts. Next turn, you can visit her for some private martial arts lessons.

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-[X] Train Magic: You have some skill in magic, but it's not really that impressive compared to some other magicians. It wouldn't hurt to train in it a little more. DC: 10/30/50

1D100+5+5+5 = 10+5+5+5 = 25

Reroll = 22+5+5+5 = 37

For the first half of the month, you'd been training yourself here and there in improving your magic. You hadn't really focused on it, though, and as a result, you hadn't improved as much as you could have. As somewhat of a perfectionist, this didn't sit well with you at all.

So, you doubled down on your magical efforts the latter half of the month and were rewarded for it well. Not only did you have a better understanding of the darks arts, you now have an actual magical spell you can use!

Micare, the Latin word for flash. It was a simple spell that allowed you to cast a miniature flashbang which stunned your opponents. Experimentation using your Allays and Vexes(Consensually, of course, you did not abuse your cute minions.), you discovered that the effect lasted for ten seconds and that it would affect everyone within about a yard. It was a fun spell.

It was also a spell you very much weren't spamming endlessly once you'd mastered it as you ran around your room screeching in utter glee, nuh-uh, there's no evidence to prove otherwise. No one can prove you did, and whoever says you did is a lying liar.

Rewards:

Darks Arts Trait now gives a +7 Bonus instead of a +5 Bonus to Magic Rolls.

Micare: A spell that causes a small flashbang which disorients nearby opponents for about ten seconds. -10 to Enemy Rolls after a Micare is successfully cast.

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-[X] Baubles and Bits: You're not too short on funds right now, but it'd be useful to get some extra money just-in-case. You could use your Allays to legally pick up random stuff they find. It won't get you in trouble, and maybe you'll find something useful along the way. DC: 10/30/50/70/90

1D100+5 = 19+5 = 24

This wasn't the best showing of your Allays. All they had to show from this was some lost money, a few pieces of scrap that might prove useful later, and some baubles and trinkets that were worth half a dollar at best.

You couldn't blame them, though. The Paw Patrol's recycling pup, Rocky, took to cleaning up the streets of Adventure Bay with a zealous attitude. He had cleaned up the town so effectively this month that the fact your Allays had gotten as much as they had was a straight-up miracle.

Still, it was a shame, and it made you sad seeing your Allays so disappointed in themselves. You needed to do something to cheer them up. Maybe get them a cookie or two each. Everyone loves cookies.

Rewards:

$100, a few pieces of scrap, and some baubles and trinkets.

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A/N:

...What the hell just happened.