A far more reasonable explanation is Iruka having hidden himself in the chamber (or outside, cameras are a thing) to observe, and then jutsu in.

Same effect, but without creation of a seal far more advanced than FTG (since we're talking FTG that is also seal-side activated, bicomponent, needs no chakra application or precise arrangement of components, has interchangeability of components. And, possibly, geolocked/proximity locked activation of as well as having realised some sort of list with sorting function attached or some such so that an appropriate proctor is summoned) while also being a terrific security risk (since any enemy getting their hands on it could summon and kill your ninjas).

Since FTG is by itself borderline-impossible hax in setting, assuming there's no more advanced mass-produced version is prudent with evidence in favor this dubious.
The whole idea is that it would summon the proctors to knock you out if you opened the seals early, pretty sure.

It's been so many years though, I have to rewatch the exams for when the story gets there. Even if I modify them, it pays off to know the source material
 
The whole idea is that it would summon the proctors to knock you out if you opened the seals early, pretty sure.

It's been so many years though, I have to rewatch the exams for when the story gets there. Even if I modify them, it pays off to know the source material

Could just make the scrolls one-time use exploding tags or some such, if you were dumb enough to open them before getting into a proper place you still failed to get them where they needed to be so failed the exam (unless you beat up more schmucks to get more scrolls, I guess).

Actual summoning seals in this particular case are just unnecessary as well as an unnecessary risk.
 
Chapter 44: Arc 4 - Brawling In The Streets: A Strategy Meeting
There was a lot of speculation last chapter about Sakura's alcohol mishap, that was just me being funny with description but it really took off and made me laugh. Thank you all for being so fun. I guess I hadn't really decided why Sakura vomited, maybe it is a rule of the world. Either way, hehe.
Patreon is 21 chapters ahead foreverrrrrr- So they got CH 65 today, some real talk had to happen after 64, in which someone got hurt. Much hugs, I had fun.
Patreon's also at $200. If it hits $300, I'll start making 4 chapters a week instead, so you know, that'll be awesome.

Enjoy CH 44. Much love, lots of talk, some Lee.
Lee really gets shafted this arc, it's not him, it's me. I just don't have a good grasp, mentally, on his overly energetic way of existing.
Sorry Lee.


It turns out that the innkeeper was quite knowledgeable about what was going on around here, and the moment Leaf ninjas arrived in the town the enemy kidnapped him and his daughter to stop them from being informed. That girl had been in charge of the job, and instead of seeking brutal efficiency she'd been rather nice to them and took a lot of extra time ensuring they were comfortable in their new confinement before she left. She'd even promised to come get them after the Leaf Ninjas were disposed of. This had meant she didn't leave before they got here.

This eventually led to a rather gruesome demise. Sakura had killed a good person. Or, no, she'd killed a less bad person. She's struggling to put her feelings into words, but it's not the death itself that's bothering her, she's figured that out.

If the innkeeper's info is to be believed, there are thirty different enemy ninjas in the village, at least, most of them Academy students who got flunked, a couple are even from Konoha, a solid group of the enemy are Genin, and the rest are all Chunin.

Which raises the question of what they do with them all. Konoha citizens being involved definitely complicates matters in a way she wasn't prepared for. It also explains the weakness of that girl, if she was a kind hearted genin missing nin, she likely wasn't very strong and just came off intimidating due to her hair ability. Where that came from, Sakura's not sure, it was probably a Kekei Genkai. Some people use theirs for everything, and never learn anything else. So when their ability is countered by a freaking table, they panic and use it more instead of thinking.

Looking at the info, Sakura can only come to one main conclusion. "We should probably go full out violence." She gulps at the looks she gets from half her new team, Neji is so stoic at all times it's kind of unnerving, she can't but think he's judging her too. "Look, I get why we'd want to avoid hurting them too much, but they're going to be executed if we bring them into Konoha proper anyway. The rules are pretty clear about missing ninjas."

"That's the phrase that makes it more complicated," Neji explains, "they're not all missing ninja. Academy students are never sworn in, and they're allowed to leave at any time. The students are just bandits."

"Which Konoha also executes," Sakura reminds him, "and transporting them all back would be impossible. I'm open to non-lethal suggestions, I'm just not seeing them."

"Lee is very strong, after we capture them all we could have someone run back to Konoha and rent a carriage, they bring it here and Lee brings it back like a horse." Tenten suggests.

"And then Konoha executes them, we've lost the money on the rental, and someone's back hurts." Sakura says, "we don't avoid death that way, we just prolong our suffering."

"Yeah but…" Tenten sighs, palming her knees and taking a deep breath. "Do you really want to have thirty-some-odd deaths on your conscience? You looked really ill earlier over one girl."

"I dunno." Sakura admits, frowning a little, nibbling her bottom lip. She would have said she wouldn't care just earlier today but watching that girl die like that… Is she developing empathy for the enemy? Why? Is it the charm? Does a higher charm mean a higher sense of connection to other people? She just assumed it meant she understood people better.

Actually, those might be the same thing. "But they'll be dead anyway, and one of us could get hurt if we try to take them lightly." Sakura finishes her answer after a long moment. "I would feel much more guilty over letting you get hurt, than them."

"As the least senior genin here, you're far more likely to be hurt than me." Tenten points out.

"Yeah, but I don't care about that." Sakura waves her off like that statement just didn't compute with her. Most of her wounds from the needles had been surface level, so she barely had to patch herself up at all, so them being missing in the morning shouldn't cause too many questions.

"We kill the genin and the chunin," Neji asserts, "we capture the academy students. We'll figure out what to do with them after, but it's not our job to determine whether their individual crimes make them bandits or misguided fools. You make a good point about it being dangerous to take them lightly, but that's not true with the academy students, they're weak, and we should be able to tie them together and make them walk back with us without much danger."

"I will take responsibility for guarding them." Lee finally cuts in out of nowhere. The boy is so quiet during tactical discussions, it's only when his enthusiasm is helpful that he appears, and it's probably the biggest thing that distances him from Naruto. It's a maturity that she didn't expect on first meeting him. She should get the two of them together, they'd probably learn and improve a lot from their friendship.

Despite Neji being the leader, Tenten and Lee both have their gaze on her, pleading and wide eyed. "I am not going to argue against killing," Sakura huffs with no small amount of furious indignance, "I would like to not kill them. I just don't want anyone getting hurt."

"I will ensure nothing happens!" Lee shouts.

"Though, in a crazy hypothetical, where it's kill one of the students or let a civilian die…" Sakura trails.

"They die." Neji says with no small amount of coolness to his tone, like talking about the weather. "It is not our job to determine the fate of criminal civilians unless otherwise specified in the mission terms, which it is not. It is our job to ensure the civilians in this village are able to continue paying taxes after we are done. Collateral damage is strictly prohibited, do what you must to protect village assets."

"Ah, well, hopefully, it won't come up. I just really needed to know." Sakura lets out a long breath she didn't realize she was holding in. "That's the kind of thing my team would likely get mad at me for."

"Your team are rookie genin, death is necessary, bloodlust is not." Neji speaks.

Tenten nods.

And Lee looks away, but it's clear he understands. "I'll do my best." Sakura slaps a palm in her lap, giving them a big smile.

"Your best resulted in vomit being added to the mess our hosts have to clean up downstairs." Tenten teases her.

"I didn't know it'd be that bitter!" Sakura defends herself.

"It's alcohol!" Tenten laughs.

"I've never had it!" Sakura can't help but feel the conversation flow out of control. She finds them getting into a cycle of laughter and banter that keeps going for a lot longer than she expected. She didn't expect killing someone and then vomiting all over the bar to be the icebreaker she needed with this team, but if it works, it works.






The night's plan was to get some rest while Neji took watch for half the night, and Lee the other half. It felt weird to Sakura to split the watch up, but Neji said he had training in his clan to work on much less sleep, and Lee only ever needed four hours, he just had too much energy to contain.

Sakura pointed out that she only needs about five hours, but she was told Lee had it and unfortunately as the new team member they wouldn't trust her to keep watch without reserves anyway. It might be necessary on a mission in the field, but out here in a small village they're fine using their normal methods., So here she is at like three AM, wandering around outside the Inn scoping out the basic area.
There's a general store, a massive building that's likely a town hall for administration, dozens of small alleys built into the structure plans specifically so ninjas could navigate in secret despite the fact that the place wasn't big enough to need stuff like that.

There's so much here, it's desolate but it also has a strange type of beauty she's not used to taking in. Konoha and Wave were different. One was a half dead shipping village, and one's a fully structured ninja institution where every decision is made with exacting reason and nothing is left up to chance.
To see a normal place without so much thought, structure, and design, it's honestly relieving. The odds she screws up Wave are a lot lower if someplace just haphazardly put together with a few guidelines can survive.

Nevermind that it's been taken over by missing ninja, that could happen to pretty much anyone except an actual ninja village. It's something she'll have to prepare to defend Wave against eventually. Wave is actually further from Konoha than this village, so odds are it has to deal with something like this eventually if she just leaves it.

Technically it already has, that's what they saved it from. Is Sakura just a liberation force now?

For once she doesn't find trouble, which is nice, but it does set her nerves on edge.
This place is about to become an active warzone, she can feel it, tomorrow they will be brawling in the streets. Will this mission be only a few days, or will they be at this for a while? Kakashi seemed to think this mission would be pretty long, but they could probably finish it tomorrow and start heading back if they went in as brutally as possible.

They won't, but if they did…
There's always the chance they get reinforcements, but given they sent only one girl to deal with the Inn, it's unlikely they're that organized.

Looking at all the buildings, it occurs to her that avoiding collateral damage may be impossible despite it being prohibited, so she takes care to create a mental image of how it looks now. It's mostly bad, dirty, damaged, but people worked hard to create these buildings and this road and knowing they might destroy some of it tomorrow feels oddly cruel.

This place should be respected to the best of their ability.
Maybe it's running her own place now that has her respecting other people's stuff, or maybe it's that lecture from her parents about treating their home like her own.

A lot swirls through her head, and once again, she can't help but wonder how Naruto and Sasuke are doing.
 
Sakura had killed a good person. Or, no, she'd killed a less bad person.
Good is not necessarily nice. And a bad guy is not necessarily a bad guy.
Also one should always keep in mind that them themselves are probably not objectively good.

"And then Konoha executes them, we've lost the money on the rental, and someone's back hurts." Sakura says, "we don't avoid death that way, we just prolong our suffering."
It is our job to ensure the civilians in this village are able to continue paying taxes after we are done.
Commendably rational. Are we sure they are in the right setting?

"We kill the genin and the chunin," Neji asserts, "we capture the academy students. We'll figure out what to do with them after, but it's not our job to determine whether their individual crimes make them bandits or misguided fools. You make a good point about it being dangerous to take them lightly, but that's not true with the academy students, they're weak, and we should be able to tie them together and make them walk back with us without much danger."
…is he expecting them to be clearly labelled? To wear rank insignia?
 
Good is not necessarily nice. And a bad guy is not necessarily a bad guy.
Also one should always keep in mind that them themselves are probably not objectively good.

Commendably rational. Are we sure they are in the right setting?

…is he expecting them to be clearly labelled? To wear rank insignia?

Nope.
He's not even expecting them to find out until they're dead, he's appeasing Tenten and Lee here.
Which will bite him.
I figure the academy dropouts will be distinguished by how much they suck at everything. :V
 
Good is not necessarily nice. And a bad guy is not necessarily a bad guy.
Also one should always keep in mind that them themselves are probably not objectively good.

Commendably rational. Are we sure they are in the right setting?

…is he expecting them to be clearly labelled? To wear rank insignia?
I mean... In setting it happens a distressing amount of the time. Missing nin wear a slashed headband and chunin vest if they ever earned one despite them being "kill on sight" insignias.
 
Nope.
He's not even expecting them to find out until they're dead, he's appeasing Tenten and Lee here.
Which will bite him.
Makes sense. And in his defence none of them thought call him on it at the time.

Anyway, how've you been Angelform?
I've asked 'What's' Angelform but I don't think I've asked 'how's' Angelform.
Generally content with life. You don't realist how soul crushing working customer service is until you stop.

I figure the academy dropouts will be distinguished by how much they suck at everything. :V
Issue is you can only find that out by watching them try to ninja. And as they are outnumbered about eight to one it is a bit risky to let them have the first shot.
 
I mean... In setting it happens a distressing amount of the time. Missing nin wear a slashed headband and chunin vest if they ever earned one despite them being "kill on sight" insignias.
My head canon about what happened there is that some of the stronger and cockier missing nin started doing that to show they could get away with openly advertising they'd abandoned their old village and dare anyone to make it an issue, then some of the weaker ones started copying them because they'd seen famous missing nin doing it, not realizing they didn't have the power to back it up.
 
My head canon about what happened there is that some of the stronger and cockier missing nin started doing that to show they could get away with openly advertising they'd abandoned their old village and dare anyone to make it an issue, then some of the weaker ones started copying them because they'd seen famous missing nin doing it, not realizing they didn't have the power to back it up.
"This new fad is killing people." - Clickbait article
 
He's not even expecting them to find out until they're dead, he's appeasing Tenten and Lee here.
Which will bite him
Being a competent chuunin and intentionally appearing mostly harmless is a high-level skill which I guess most won't have, but being actually mostly harmless but with a few highly dangerous talents is something even drop-out students can manage. Just look at miss Not-Innkeeper with her kekkai.
 
Remember Missing Nin need to get hired for jobs. That means they need to advertise. Hence the headbands, if they turn bandit lord they won't last long whether or not they wear the signs, but if they are just passing through the headband means the locals know they are in the market for jobs, cheaper than the villages and not likely to ask questions
 
Being a competent chuunin and intentionally appearing mostly harmless is a high-level skill which I guess most won't have, but being actually mostly harmless but with a few highly dangerous talents is something even drop-out students can manage. Just look at miss Not-Innkeeper with her kekkai.
You can apparently graduate without knowing what chakra is (Naruto), being able to do ninjutsu (Lee), or being able to fight your way out of a paper bag (canon Sakura). I'm also inclined to think that anybody who didn't even hold out until graduation before going missing is not going to be in the top percentile. (Who goes missing at 11 or younger anyway?)
 
(Who goes missing at 11 or younger anyway?)
Well, to name a couple of possibilities. 1) People with dangerous bloodline abilities who are hated by civilians and those without kekkai genkai. 2) Kids whose parents go rogue.

And, sure, most pre-graduation ninja aren't going to be hot stuff but you only have to underestimate one psychopathic pre-teen prodigy to ruin your whole day.
 
Well, to name a couple of possibilities. 1) People with dangerous bloodline abilities who are hated by civilians and those without kekkai genkai. 2) Kids whose parents go rogue.

And, sure, most pre-graduation ninja aren't going to be hot stuff but you only have to underestimate one psychopathic pre-teen prodigy to ruin your whole day.
Aint nobody wanna find out the kid they just underestimated is Itachi 2.0
 
Aint nobody wanna find out the kid they just underestimated is Itachi 2.0
He doesn't even need to be Itachi. Learning just one stupid trick and mastering it is enough to ruin someone's day.
Because you have no idea what a self taught amateur gonna do. I'm reminded of that Youjo Senki/Naruto crossover where Tanya builds a whole combat style out of failing to properly tree walk - if you put too much chakra into tree walking it's gonna explode. She just refines it a little.
 
You can apparently graduate without knowing what chakra is (Naruto), being able to do ninjutsu (Lee), or being able to fight your way out of a paper bag (canon Sakura). I'm also inclined to think that anybody who didn't even hold out until graduation before going missing is not going to be in the top percentile. (Who goes missing at 11 or younger anyway?)
Tbh the Genin jobs are mostly menial stuff that only require chakra enhancement at all?
 
Tbh the Genin jobs are mostly menial stuff that only require chakra enhancement at all?
Not really. Remember that Tazuna's official mission (escorting someone all the way to another country while protecting them from bandits and other hazards) was considered genin-level. By the same token, the Chuunin Exam is proof that genin are expected to be able to fight other genin in potentially lethal combat.
 
I'd argue that Chunin exams are testing for Chunin ability. Any Genin with a shot at passing should be at least low Chunin in ability.

As for the Tazuna escort - remember the most they expect to face were ordinary bandits, which chakra enhancement and even minimal combat skill would cover.

They'd have to pay a lot better if theres reason to expect ninjas
 
I'd argue that Chunin exams are testing for Chunin ability. Any Genin with a shot at passing should be at least low Chunin in ability.
You would think that, but only one person actually passed, so...

As for the Tazuna escort - remember the most they expect to face were ordinary bandits, which chakra enhancement and even minimal combat skill would cover.
Sure, but bandits are still "battle to the death while potentially outnumbered by armed adults" material. I don't think I'd describe that as menial stuff for a twelve-year-old.
 
Canon-Side Story: Business Naruto Meets the Union of Cleaners
Another week above $70, another Side Story.
I say "Canon" here but I'm iffy. It's more like "this could have happened, and maybe did" but it's a little too um... self indulgent? Is that the right word?
You'll see.

$10 patrons voted unanimously on this one, so here we are. If you'd like to have a say in the next one, join meeee!

"Why are you brushing my hair?" Don't get him wrong, Naruto can't help but flush with joy at the feeling of a mother figure going over him like this. She's doing what he thinks is called coddling, and it's very nice. It makes him feel tingly everywhere, and he could get very used to this.

But it's odd right now. "You can't go into that meeting looking bad, you're representing your entire brand. How can you sell cleanliness if you don't look clean?"

She makes a point, but it's so awkward! He likes his spiky mane and she's making it seem like they won't. A mirror is placed in front of him, and he mourns his normal look. It's so formal and boring, in a suit and tie and stuffy slicked back hair. "At least you're not making me color my hair black."

"I'm surprised you've even heard of that," his new mom snickers, "that's such an old tradition. We stopped doing that after the fourth made a name for himself. I barely even saw that."

"Civilians still get stuffy and weird." Naruto defends himself.

"Right, well, you're looking good, just remember to be polite, you're here to avoid a fight, not start one. They have a valid complaint and you need to listen to them."

"I get it." He nods, he agrees, there is a serious problem and he'd like to approach it with tact.




Mebuki is absolutely nuts is the first thing Naruto thinks when he sits down at the table. Their meeting is at a high-end steak place, which makes him a little nervous even if he's sure he has the money with how things have been going lately. It's awkward, having so much cash and nothing to spend it on. It feels wrong to spend it on himself, and Mebuki doesn't need money. Or at least she says she doesn't need money. He can't spend it on Sakura, she'd get mad at him. Haku's making a ton of money himself, and Sasuke's rich.

He's currently trying to figure out how to take Ino out without it being weird, since she's currently a friend, technically, and he'd like to get to know her better.

The steak house is very fancy, the air smells nice and the people look very polite. The issue is the four men and one woman he sits with. One's missing an eye, it's been replaced with a glass ball. He's a little overweight, and is dressed in shorts and a floral shirt.

And it only gets weirder from there. This is not a group he should be worried about his appearance with. The only one here besides him who's dressed nicely is the woman, and she looks only a little older than him and awkwardly out of her depth. Shy and demure, that's probably not good when your competitors are sweaty old men. Maybe he can add some diversity to this, even if he is a white male… nevermind.

"I am Uzumaki Naruto the second, but you may call me Business Naruto." He offers his hand across the table, and is somewhat relieved when no one takes it.

"Why the odd moniker? Last I checked, Uzumaki Naruto was still alive, and you don't look like you could be his kid…" The older man in the floral shirt says, his glass eye rolling as he speaks.

"Correct, I am a clone," Business Naruto introduces himself, "the original is busy with being a patriotic Ninja and making Konoha cleaner from the outside, I have been created with the designated patriotic purpose of making our great nation cleaner from the inside."

"Ah… Can you actually clean? I thought clones were illusions or sommat." One of the other men asks.

"I can do anything except engage in violence. I imagine that will not be a problem, will it?" Naruto stares the men down, and finds they back up a little in their seats. Oddly enough, the girl leans in, curiously eying him from head to toe. Well, as much as one can see in a seat across a table. "My workers consist entirely of other clones, allowing us to clean high priority or dangerous places without safety concerns. We work mainly with ninja homes at the moment, though that's bringing about a few problems of its own. In fact, our entire business model is, that's why we're here."

"Yes, the workers rights movement," The eyeless man agrees, "we called this meeting because you're not paying your workers, allowing you to undercut our prices dramatically. We can't charge what you charge, because we need to pay people, and you don't."

"It's a serious problem," The girl speaks up, slapping her hand against the table and revealing that maybe she's not as demure as he thinks, "my girls are already in poverty, I can't pay them less, but I'd have to pay them half as much to lower my price to what you're charging."

"That sounds like you were already underpaying them…" Naruto points out.

"Not the point," She crosses her arms, glaring at him hard, "you need to raise your price or we'll have serious problems."

"I'll tell you what," Business Naruto nods, reminding himself of just how much money he's made recently, raising his price would only make that issue worse but their workers do need to eat, "how about we work out an agreement to pay workers fairly, and we figure out exactly how much we should be charging to continue normal profits. I will conform to the agreed upon number if you all do."

"You want us to share our ledgers with you?" One of the men raises his brow, he's skin and bones, and missing half his teeth, "no, I think I'm good."

"Then I don't really think you underpaying your workers is my problem," Naruto shrugs, "I'm already charging twice what I think is fair. Maybe I should lower it and spread out to normal cleaning services?"

"We'll lodge a formal complaint." The girl growls.

"Will you have the money to take action against me if I take over the entire industry overnight?" Naruto asks, standing up and glaring them all down. "I could do anything. Creating more clones isn't the kind of effort you think it is. I have infinite chakra, and you all know why."

They all look away, and he damn well knows why, "Cleaning isn't effort. What do you think happens if I decide every Friday, a hundred-thousand clones work without charge? The fourth Hokage couldn't outlast my prisoner's chakra when it was a savage beast working without a brain, do you think you stand a chance with me in charge?"

He channels a little Sakura here, or maybe it's Sasuke, Mebuki? It's someone, whatever the case, he watches them all shiver, most importantly he watches them take him seriously.

"Ahh, um, you said you wanted to work out fair compensation for all our workers?" One of the men asks.

"I'd like it to be equalized," Naruto begins, "that way who each employee works for is based on their specialty and the work environment they would like. If we all paid our workers the same and charged similar amounts, it would create a results driven competition instead of economy driven competition. We could also work out fair pricing for different types of cleaning and properties, and keep our own specialties without having to worry about undercutting each-other."

"And, if we don't comply with that, you'll destroy us?" The girl gulps.

"No, I only agreed to this meeting to avoid conflict," he begins, "but if you'll take action against me, I'll take action in kind. The only reason not to show me how much you're charging and how much you're paying your employees, is if you're afraid of what I'll have to say about it. So are we cooperating or are we fighting?"

He sees exactly one grimace, "Friendly reminder, I am an infinite horde without relent or pause, only existing to clean. Payment is in the way of my whimsy, not the cause of it. I'm only charging out of consideration for you, don't tempt me with a good time."

Naruto would receive dozens of doctored documents, and almost the entire cleaning industry of Konoha would receive a sixty percent raise, the only catch being they had to lie and say they'd always been making that much.

Naruto would take charge of all ninja cleaning services, in agreement that at least for the next year, he would not spread his horde of bubbles outside his niche, and that they would be allowed to take a ninja job should someone specifically seek them out with complaints about him. They would have to forward the complaints to him so he could attempt to fix the issue, but he would accept it if someone truly wanted another company.
 
Back
Top