According to Wikipedia, all his films are self-funded from his architecture work in Las Vegas.
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According to Wikipedia, all his films are self-funded from his architecture work in Las Vegas.
- Location
- HELL
- Pronouns
- They/It
He's gonna use architecture to hack into the government's news police network slave trade and spread anthrax flour on the world.
- Location
- Somewhere!
- Pronouns
- She/Her
Are there examples of this architecture somewhere? Are there buildings with his name somewhere, or five dozen laptops buried deep into the concrete to claim the topsoil for Breen?
All I can find is this.
samdamandias
Apprentice Plane Wizard
Breen.
Breen happened. And not the fun kind with the silly helmets.
Sunspring was not written by a human. It's still better than Breen.
So Athene's comments regarding the wife's shaky accent got me curious. A short Google later turned this up for Klara Landrat on IMDb.
Athene
Rise for the Shadow Queen
- Location
- Dream of The 90s
- Pronouns
- She/Her
Fateful Findings resumes with Neil Breen in his office. Let the laptops ground you. He wonders how Jim could have killed himself. How could he have killed himself ? How could he have killed himself. He then says that he's so tired and passes out, waking up in the Trash Bag Room. Its terribly mysterious and also terrible. Breen remains naked. Breen is always naked when he can swing it, and by it I mean Little Breen.
But no time for that, he has to berate his wife! He yells at her, that its not her fault and she shouldn't blame herself. His constant berating just isn't working though.
"It's my fault, I pushed him at the BBQ"
The audience furrows its brow. She mildly pushed him when he tried to grope her and he knocked over some stuff. It was quickly glossed over but its the source of her self torture? Boy, its hard to tell what's a plot point when nothing matters.
She says that its her fault, he wasn't a bad person and she also feels bad for her and Breen having problems.
"It's all my fault" she laments "You better off without me"
Breen considers this for what is definitely too long, and then sedately says he's not, and he's totally here for her. He goes over his lines repeatedly when engaging his defective emoting circuits, as he has learned that is what human beings do when they act.
No time for that though, we're back in with the laptops! He stares at his silent, dead phone for a second and then picks it up. He gets into an argument about signing a book deal and contract. What does this have to do with anything? Nothing. Nothing at all. Its just there to have him throw around copies of his book and then-
WE ROCKET INTO THE TRASH BAG ROOM. He's managed to trap a naked, lifeless Leah in there this time, which can only mean its power is growing. Soon it will be a Hefty bag house and then nobody can stop him. The actress playing Leah is desperately clinging to herself to try to show as nothing as possible. Hey weren't you telling your wife how much she means to you? Thirty, maybe forty seconds ago? Oh well, she's surely going to not die randomly minutes from now.
Oh but now we're back in the office.
"I can't go on like this" she says, shoving a book off a table.
"I'm losing my mind" she says, shoving the remainder off. She exits stage right. Except as we've seen, there is no actual exit that direction, only a wall. So she is forced to slowly back into the wall and try to push herself as flat as possible, trying to hid from the movie. There is no hiding Landrat, the scene is lit so that we can clearly see your shadow. Eat your heart out Villaneuva.
Then we've slammed the movie back down into second, and we're in the corner they've shoved the old lady into. She's encouraging him to get together with Leah and asks about the dream he's been having and is the dream about Leah? The world will never know as it grinds its way into third, as he's back at Dr Gototen who is saying they can increase the dosage of the pills he's not taking. But haha, forget about that too! We cut to an establishing shot of the door again, and he's back in the same guys office as he asks about his dream. What is his dream? Never mind, the doctor immediately switches to asking if he's really writing a book.
"TELL ME" he yells, as his glasses try to escape his face. We're suddenly in the foyer as Breen climbs the stairs, his therapist still talking to him. We're now in the office again. Did Breen fuck up the timeline in Premiere or am I actually going insane here?! We're drunkenly swerving through scenes now. I can't be sure of anything. Is anyone reading this? Am I typing anything? Will I ever not be watching this movie?
In the movie that may or may not be happening, the Doctor is now asking him if he's been seeing other psychotherapists. Breen assures him he's not, which immediately flags him as a Therapist Adulterer. The poor psychotherapist. All those empty sessions. The lies, the doubts. Breen doesn't even look at him when they make analysis! They used to have something special!
"Help I don't know how glasses work"
He asks about his research, Breen demands to know what research and we smash cut into his wife narcing on him in exchange for prescriptions. She even tells him that he's been hacking into things. All the things. My god, if you can't trust a drug addled woman you constantly berate, who can you trust?!
NO TIME FOR THAT THOUGH. Breen, minutes of screentime after telling his wife she's everything to him, meets with Leah. Is it creepy? Of course it is. It also leads to one of the most fucked up juxtapositions I've ever seen.
As they declare their unending love for each other, his wife is drinking and taking pills. As they wander through the forest outside Flagstaff, she's taking pills. As they play with their magic mashroom and the sparkles it creates, she's doing pills. As she begins to overdose on purpose, they declare it to be a magical day!
Your wife is dying, hooray! What a magical day! They make what I am lead to believe is love. WHAT A MAGICAL DAY. Breen's shirt explodes off him as he gently lowers the straps on her dress. It looks like someone combined Nudist Beach and bad Zardoz cosplay. As she dies, BREEN TELEPORTS IN FROM STAGE RIGHT HOLY SHIT.
What is editing logic? What is human emotion? What is Breen?
Touching music plays. Despite the fact he intercut adultery and suicide, we're supposed to feel bad for his loss. His wife died! Convenient sure since he found a new love of his life and this saves him alimony. I'm sure nobody would have questions about that. He screams in silent anguish before slamming us back once again into Laptop Central. The Council of Vaio must discuss these events.
"Emily is dead" he tells his phone as his magic cube disappears. No I don't know either, shut up. Questions only slow things down at this point. His anguish is interrupted by a flashback of him romancing Leah and then oh fuck no, we're back in the Trash bag room. He's wearing black wool socks in the trash bag room. Nothing else. I guess his feet get cold in the Void. He's trapped Leah there again. You can feel her regret through the screen.
But fuck all that, we have a main plot to get to! He's back talking to his therapist on the phone about his research. Its going to be huge. Going to change everything. So big, that he is suddenly in the room with her like they've been talking in person the whole time. HE TELEPORTED. It is just one of his powers! YOUR WEAPONS ARE USELESS KRANKOR!
But enough of that, he's eating ruffage in a plate as an imitation of your human salads because he is a human too. He tells Leah he's been hacking into all the things. Government and Corporate. He's found dishonesty and hypocrisy! No actual crimes or anything. You don't need crimes or evidence or specific allegations. Its all corrupt! He's going to change the world!
But oh no, thanks to his ex wife dropping dime, the vague yet menacing government conspiracy knows about it! They send his most dangerous opponent after him: A particularly nefarious wall outlet. Watch out, its 110v!
Oh and eventually an incompetent kidnapper shows up.
She's taken to the U-Store It and locked in a van. Her kidnapper gets drunk and is easily jumped by Breen. The trailer is locked though so he steps up to the door and teleports through. HE'S MAGIC NOW. HE CAN DO THAT. BREEN POWERS. He tells Leah to be quiet and then teleports her out. Subplot over. We dodged a bullet there, we could have had some sort of cohesive plot and rising and falling action. Much like any woman who has been with Breen can tell you, there will be no climaxes here.
Oh so were we just talking about a Government Conspiracy? Yeah fuck that, we're back in plot #32. He's yelling at Aly that she can't come over anymore. There's a statue of a horse in the background that really dominates the scene. Oh and they wrap up the entire Jim plot by having her tell the police off screen. We're really moving now!
They're in bed now. The bed his wife killed herself in. The sheets are the same. Did they even wash them? What awkward second date talk. "Hey honey, fair warning: She did void herself when she died but I don't know how the dryer works. We're rolling with it and possibly in it. " Hey speaking of his wife: Did she ever get buried?there wasn't a funeral or mention of anything. Given the police are only just now talking to Aly's mom, is it the same day?! Did Neil Breen just starch her and prop her up in the corner?!
A ghost farts on them as they sleep. It sneaks through the house, doing light filing and shakes a couple mirrors. Worst poltergeist ever. The clock gets a closeup, its 11:59 am. The battery is low. The house is completely dark. Is there a total eclipse of the sun going on outside?
Breen leaves the house and drives out to the desert. The book and the ghosts are there.
"SHOULD I BE AFRAID?" he yells at the book
"SHOULD WE BE AFRAID?" He yells, like a man trying to get Alexa to load the right movie.
The book fades away. His therapist fades away. Nothing remains and nothing has mattered. Nothing has ever mattered.
She died on the way back to her home planet.
Neil Breen spoons Leah as a ghost does more light filing. We're really firing on all cylinders now. The ghost spills cherry syrup all over the floor but cleans it up by vanishing. What a thoughtful ghost.
Oh and Neil Breen saved the world off screen. He's holding a press conference. He exposed all the things with his hacking. More than all the other hackers. Everywhere. He manages to get all the government and business together so they can all confess and commit suicide. He releases the information. All the information.
"I was in business to make money, like many businesses." says a man in a suit, the background never moving or changing once no matter where we are in space and time. "They know too much about my crimes" and BAM, suicide. Shot to the head.
DID YOU THINK I WAS JOKING?!
The Senator? Resigns because he's incompetent. Then hangs himself. Because he's incompetent, a crime worthy of death. Breen smiles a toothy grin as he plays pied piper.
[Hearty Chuckle Intensifies]
Breen assures us that nobody innocent will suffer from his files. Only the bad people will pay and they must be ELIMINATED. One such person is the President of The Bank. Which one? The Bank. The one bank. "We were all pressured to operate in a deceiving way" he says, before BAM, he shoots himself too. This is Neil Breen's Baptism Massacre scene and frankly, take that Coppola!
"WHAT A WONDERFUL DAY"
A congresswoman resigns. The people deserve more so she gasses herself to death. The crimes were going to be disclosed. Insurance company guy who is having trouble seeing the cue card? Pills.
"Down I go"
Wall Street Broker? Slits his wrists in the shower and is taken away in a sleeping bag.
I will never stop loving the Whiskey in the soap dish.
Breen gives a final speech as an assassin takes aim with a rifle. There's the sound of a gun going off. He falls over dead. Who shot him? I dunno, Breen? He used MIND BULLETS. That's Telekinesis Kyle. He urges you all to take action for yourselves! What does that mean? ACTION! TAKE IT! SPECIFICS ARE FOR LESSER MEN.
And with that we're free. We're free from the movie. Its the credits now. They have the best twist you never knew you wanted.
WAIT FOR IT.
So that's uh, Fateful Findings? It's...well its something. its definitely a thing. A thing that happened. I only was able to talk about perhaps 5% of everything that was weird or fucked up with the movie. He's an absolutely terrible filmmaker but he's possessed by delusions of absolute grandeur. His politics are bonkers. His acting is completely devoid of anything approaching human emotion or believability. He never stops getting naked. His clothes must be spring loaded! What a weird, weird man.
God I fucking love it. Its a magically bad movie. I've seen it five times now and we're still figuring shit out. Its infinitely mockable because Jesus Christ, LOOK AT IT. The Room makes more sense and is way more coherent! He's also not as far up his own butt about his message either.
And then next comes Pass Thru next. Its more coherent...sort of, but crazier. So very, very crazy. Tigers and Blow crazy.
But no time for that, he has to berate his wife! He yells at her, that its not her fault and she shouldn't blame herself. His constant berating just isn't working though.
"It's my fault, I pushed him at the BBQ"
The audience furrows its brow. She mildly pushed him when he tried to grope her and he knocked over some stuff. It was quickly glossed over but its the source of her self torture? Boy, its hard to tell what's a plot point when nothing matters.
She says that its her fault, he wasn't a bad person and she also feels bad for her and Breen having problems.
"It's all my fault" she laments "You better off without me"
Breen considers this for what is definitely too long, and then sedately says he's not, and he's totally here for her. He goes over his lines repeatedly when engaging his defective emoting circuits, as he has learned that is what human beings do when they act.
No time for that though, we're back in with the laptops! He stares at his silent, dead phone for a second and then picks it up. He gets into an argument about signing a book deal and contract. What does this have to do with anything? Nothing. Nothing at all. Its just there to have him throw around copies of his book and then-
WE ROCKET INTO THE TRASH BAG ROOM. He's managed to trap a naked, lifeless Leah in there this time, which can only mean its power is growing. Soon it will be a Hefty bag house and then nobody can stop him. The actress playing Leah is desperately clinging to herself to try to show as nothing as possible. Hey weren't you telling your wife how much she means to you? Thirty, maybe forty seconds ago? Oh well, she's surely going to not die randomly minutes from now.
Oh but now we're back in the office.
"I can't go on like this" she says, shoving a book off a table.
"I'm losing my mind" she says, shoving the remainder off. She exits stage right. Except as we've seen, there is no actual exit that direction, only a wall. So she is forced to slowly back into the wall and try to push herself as flat as possible, trying to hid from the movie. There is no hiding Landrat, the scene is lit so that we can clearly see your shadow. Eat your heart out Villaneuva.
Then we've slammed the movie back down into second, and we're in the corner they've shoved the old lady into. She's encouraging him to get together with Leah and asks about the dream he's been having and is the dream about Leah? The world will never know as it grinds its way into third, as he's back at Dr Gototen who is saying they can increase the dosage of the pills he's not taking. But haha, forget about that too! We cut to an establishing shot of the door again, and he's back in the same guys office as he asks about his dream. What is his dream? Never mind, the doctor immediately switches to asking if he's really writing a book.
"TELL ME" he yells, as his glasses try to escape his face. We're suddenly in the foyer as Breen climbs the stairs, his therapist still talking to him. We're now in the office again. Did Breen fuck up the timeline in Premiere or am I actually going insane here?! We're drunkenly swerving through scenes now. I can't be sure of anything. Is anyone reading this? Am I typing anything? Will I ever not be watching this movie?
In the movie that may or may not be happening, the Doctor is now asking him if he's been seeing other psychotherapists. Breen assures him he's not, which immediately flags him as a Therapist Adulterer. The poor psychotherapist. All those empty sessions. The lies, the doubts. Breen doesn't even look at him when they make analysis! They used to have something special!
"Help I don't know how glasses work"
NO TIME FOR THAT THOUGH. Breen, minutes of screentime after telling his wife she's everything to him, meets with Leah. Is it creepy? Of course it is. It also leads to one of the most fucked up juxtapositions I've ever seen.
As they declare their unending love for each other, his wife is drinking and taking pills. As they wander through the forest outside Flagstaff, she's taking pills. As they play with their magic mashroom and the sparkles it creates, she's doing pills. As she begins to overdose on purpose, they declare it to be a magical day!
Your wife is dying, hooray! What a magical day! They make what I am lead to believe is love. WHAT A MAGICAL DAY. Breen's shirt explodes off him as he gently lowers the straps on her dress. It looks like someone combined Nudist Beach and bad Zardoz cosplay. As she dies, BREEN TELEPORTS IN FROM STAGE RIGHT HOLY SHIT.
What is editing logic? What is human emotion? What is Breen?
Touching music plays. Despite the fact he intercut adultery and suicide, we're supposed to feel bad for his loss. His wife died! Convenient sure since he found a new love of his life and this saves him alimony. I'm sure nobody would have questions about that. He screams in silent anguish before slamming us back once again into Laptop Central. The Council of Vaio must discuss these events.
"Emily is dead" he tells his phone as his magic cube disappears. No I don't know either, shut up. Questions only slow things down at this point. His anguish is interrupted by a flashback of him romancing Leah and then oh fuck no, we're back in the Trash bag room. He's wearing black wool socks in the trash bag room. Nothing else. I guess his feet get cold in the Void. He's trapped Leah there again. You can feel her regret through the screen.
But fuck all that, we have a main plot to get to! He's back talking to his therapist on the phone about his research. Its going to be huge. Going to change everything. So big, that he is suddenly in the room with her like they've been talking in person the whole time. HE TELEPORTED. It is just one of his powers! YOUR WEAPONS ARE USELESS KRANKOR!
But enough of that, he's eating ruffage in a plate as an imitation of your human salads because he is a human too. He tells Leah he's been hacking into all the things. Government and Corporate. He's found dishonesty and hypocrisy! No actual crimes or anything. You don't need crimes or evidence or specific allegations. Its all corrupt! He's going to change the world!
But oh no, thanks to his ex wife dropping dime, the vague yet menacing government conspiracy knows about it! They send his most dangerous opponent after him: A particularly nefarious wall outlet. Watch out, its 110v!
Oh and eventually an incompetent kidnapper shows up.
She's taken to the U-Store It and locked in a van. Her kidnapper gets drunk and is easily jumped by Breen. The trailer is locked though so he steps up to the door and teleports through. HE'S MAGIC NOW. HE CAN DO THAT. BREEN POWERS. He tells Leah to be quiet and then teleports her out. Subplot over. We dodged a bullet there, we could have had some sort of cohesive plot and rising and falling action. Much like any woman who has been with Breen can tell you, there will be no climaxes here.
Oh so were we just talking about a Government Conspiracy? Yeah fuck that, we're back in plot #32. He's yelling at Aly that she can't come over anymore. There's a statue of a horse in the background that really dominates the scene. Oh and they wrap up the entire Jim plot by having her tell the police off screen. We're really moving now!
They're in bed now. The bed his wife killed herself in. The sheets are the same. Did they even wash them? What awkward second date talk. "Hey honey, fair warning: She did void herself when she died but I don't know how the dryer works. We're rolling with it and possibly in it. " Hey speaking of his wife: Did she ever get buried?there wasn't a funeral or mention of anything. Given the police are only just now talking to Aly's mom, is it the same day?! Did Neil Breen just starch her and prop her up in the corner?!
A ghost farts on them as they sleep. It sneaks through the house, doing light filing and shakes a couple mirrors. Worst poltergeist ever. The clock gets a closeup, its 11:59 am. The battery is low. The house is completely dark. Is there a total eclipse of the sun going on outside?
Breen leaves the house and drives out to the desert. The book and the ghosts are there.
"SHOULD I BE AFRAID?" he yells at the book
"SHOULD WE BE AFRAID?" He yells, like a man trying to get Alexa to load the right movie.
The book fades away. His therapist fades away. Nothing remains and nothing has mattered. Nothing has ever mattered.
She died on the way back to her home planet.
Neil Breen spoons Leah as a ghost does more light filing. We're really firing on all cylinders now. The ghost spills cherry syrup all over the floor but cleans it up by vanishing. What a thoughtful ghost.
Oh and Neil Breen saved the world off screen. He's holding a press conference. He exposed all the things with his hacking. More than all the other hackers. Everywhere. He manages to get all the government and business together so they can all confess and commit suicide. He releases the information. All the information.
"I was in business to make money, like many businesses." says a man in a suit, the background never moving or changing once no matter where we are in space and time. "They know too much about my crimes" and BAM, suicide. Shot to the head.
DID YOU THINK I WAS JOKING?!
The Senator? Resigns because he's incompetent. Then hangs himself. Because he's incompetent, a crime worthy of death. Breen smiles a toothy grin as he plays pied piper.
[Hearty Chuckle Intensifies]
Breen assures us that nobody innocent will suffer from his files. Only the bad people will pay and they must be ELIMINATED. One such person is the President of The Bank. Which one? The Bank. The one bank. "We were all pressured to operate in a deceiving way" he says, before BAM, he shoots himself too. This is Neil Breen's Baptism Massacre scene and frankly, take that Coppola!
"WHAT A WONDERFUL DAY"
A congresswoman resigns. The people deserve more so she gasses herself to death. The crimes were going to be disclosed. Insurance company guy who is having trouble seeing the cue card? Pills.
"Down I go"
Wall Street Broker? Slits his wrists in the shower and is taken away in a sleeping bag.
I will never stop loving the Whiskey in the soap dish.
And with that we're free. We're free from the movie. Its the credits now. They have the best twist you never knew you wanted.
WAIT FOR IT.
So that's uh, Fateful Findings? It's...well its something. its definitely a thing. A thing that happened. I only was able to talk about perhaps 5% of everything that was weird or fucked up with the movie. He's an absolutely terrible filmmaker but he's possessed by delusions of absolute grandeur. His politics are bonkers. His acting is completely devoid of anything approaching human emotion or believability. He never stops getting naked. His clothes must be spring loaded! What a weird, weird man.
God I fucking love it. Its a magically bad movie. I've seen it five times now and we're still figuring shit out. Its infinitely mockable because Jesus Christ, LOOK AT IT. The Room makes more sense and is way more coherent! He's also not as far up his own butt about his message either.
And then next comes Pass Thru next. Its more coherent...sort of, but crazier. So very, very crazy. Tigers and Blow crazy.
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- Location
- Somewhere!
- Pronouns
- She/Her
The credit gag is a surprising ammount of effort for... nothing? Like, is there some joke there that I'm just missing or is it just "haha psych did you really think I could afford companies for this?"
Ellimist system
Newly cracked system full of traumatized yahoos.
- Location
- Floating on a rock with my headmates.
- Pronouns
- She/Her/Other
- Location
- National Capital Region, USA
I did not need that image...
+10 Internet points for the MST3k ref!
What about the power.... to move you?
I think the acid is kicking in...
- Pronouns
- He/Him
I'm still not entirely convinced this movie is real.
CompassJimbo
Where’s Your North?
- Location
- The former Rubber Capital of the World
How Can This Movie Be Real If Our Eyes Aren't Real?
There is no Real, only Neil.
- Location
- HELL
- Pronouns
- They/It
This is an accurate description of [insert breen film]
tankdrop24
Tread First into Hell
- Location
- The Center of the Universe: Toronto, Canada
- Pronouns
- He/Him
I tried to get through both reviews but currently have finished neither due to the fact that whenever a mental image starts to form in my head of one of these movies my eyes start to leak out of my ears.
- Location
- in the trash
Wikipedia said:
what
Ah yes, The Bank, the secret shadowy conspiracy that controls the global economy through the Invisible Hand.
You've actually been talking to your hallucinations THE ENTIRE TIME.
Fuck it. I'm just going to assume the events of this entire movie is actually Breen hallucinating everything inside the trash bag room, as he's dying from a drug overdose.
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CompassJimbo
Where’s Your North?
- Location
- The former Rubber Capital of the World
Is it me, or could these movies be turned into a parody of Black Ops?
Ellimist system
Newly cracked system full of traumatized yahoos.
- Location
- Floating on a rock with my headmates.
- Pronouns
- She/Her/Other
You take that back! Caje only has two trashbag rooms, max.
- Location
- in the trash
Clearly not. If you go by this film, nothing is a coincidence and the sexy nurse tending to you after a horrific car crash is actually your childhood love interest.
- Pronouns
- He/Him
This has been bugging me. This guy didn't kill himself, he shot himself in the jaw. That's gonna hurt like a bitch but is in theory survivable.
"WHAT A WONDERFUL DAY"
- Location
- Somewhere!
- Pronouns
- She/Her
That plus his facial expression just makes it look like the laziest death possible.