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MakeAmericaSaneAgain. A 2016 political campaign.

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Whew. Vote's closed ladies and gents. Can someone crunch numbers while I start up my dice roller?
 
Vote Tally : Original - CampaignQuest 2016 | Page 17 | Sufficient Velocity
##### NetTally 1.7.5
[X] Plan Trumpicide
[X] Dinner time!. Dwayne is fired up after last week! He wants to have you around for dinner, with your "wife" Jeanie. You...uh...you haven't told him that she's your assistant, not your wife, and after you joked about the invitation, she ain't letting you tell him. He's got some fundraising ideas. Apparently there are some Republican wrestlers he wants you to meet. He hasn't said if that has anything to do with his idea. (Cost: 25k. Chance of Success: 85% Result: Unknown (high) amount of k raised. Get to know the Rock better. Acquire Waifu? Get to meet Republican wrestling icons.)
[X] Keeping tabs. All considered, this was nearly a fucking catastrophe. Nearly being the operative word here. It wasn't, not quite. Still, now you've got the basic outline of Walker's campaign, and sent him into paranoia mode, it might be a good idea to search out everyone else. (Cost: 5k Chance of Success: 65% Time to Completion: Two Weeks Result: Information on a specific campaign gained. Specify Candidate.)
[X] The Beanslide begins. Apparently Harry has been taking Scott Walker's attacks very personally. You acn't blame him. You have been as well. He's a realy piece of work, that slick-haired twat. Harry's got an idea to help screw him, though. (Cost: 15k upfront. Unknown amount down the road. Chance of Success: Unknown. Time to Completion: Unknown. Result: Harry Enten appeased. Otherwise unknown. This action locks until completion)
[X] Catching tumbleweeds. You don't really have infrastructure there, but Harry insists it isn't needed, for a small price, he can get some interns to start reporting on the situation in Nevada. It's the fourth state up, and if you want this campaign to be anything more than a swansong for the moderate wing of the Republican party, you need to start plan ahead. Far ahead. (Cost: 12k. Chance of Success: 60%
[X] Practice debate. Having a few practice debates with the team should get George in the right state of mind for August. Sure, it's awhile away, but it doesn't hurt to prepare. (Debating skill increased by +10)
[X] Practice Issue familiarity. This is important for when the debate season starts, but also if you have to give interviews. Having George able to not fuck up the few interviews he will land would be a very, very good idea. (Issue Familiarity increased by +10)
[X] Brushing up old contacts. Pataki knew a lot of people, back in the day, and his personal word carries a helluva lot more weight than yours. Maybe he can dig up some endorsers? (Cost: 10K Chance of Success: 75% Result: Endorsers found. +Momentum in State. Specify state. Restricted to New England, New York, Iowa and Illinois.)
[X] Prepare a speech. You know what fires up a crowd? A good speech. You are rising, and fast, so it can't hurt you to turbo-charge that with a big speech in one of the upcoming states! Especially with debates coming up in just over a month. You have to qualify. (Pick topic of speech, State it will be given in. Cost: 10k Chance of Success: Varies by state/topic. Result: Momentum greatly increased in [STATE] NOTE: SPEECHES CAN BE USED TO ATTACK CANDIDATES)
[X] Raise money. Libby has contacts in the beauty product industry, primarily with Revlon, as well as having ties to the pro-Israel lobby. Hopefully she can bring in some more cash for the campaign and SuperPAC with these people(Cost: Free. Chance of Success: 50% Result:
[X] Can you spare half a dollar?. Cool J is in talks with an old friend in the rap community. He wants some time off to get him fully on board, and assure him that Pataki is sufficiently conservative on fiscal and foreign policy to earn his endorsement (Cost: 15k Chance of Success: 65% Result: Parties unknown endorse Pataki.)
No. of Votes: 15
Plan: ◈Trumpicide
butchock
Chengar Qordath
Corvus Black
Crazy7s1
Cybandeath
maximorph
Necron_Lord
Neptune
Random Asian Person
ThatsSoKraven
The Laurent
tygerbright
Versharl
Whumbly
whydoyoubother
[X] Plan Pat for President
No. of Votes: 5
Plan: ◈Pat for President
Aramus
BCK233
Eurocorp
Friend-Computer
Sticht55
[X] Dinner time! Cost: 25k.
[X] Keeping tabs. Cost: 5k
[X] The Beanslide begins. Cost: 15k
[X] Practice debate. Free
[X] Practice Issue familiarity. Free
[X] Brushing up old contacts. Cost: 10K
[X] Prepare a speech. Cost: 10k
[X] Raise money. Cost: Free.
[X] Can you spare half a dollar?. Cost: 15k
No. of Votes: 1
Dark as Silver
Total No. of Voters: 21
 
CAMPAIGN ACTIONS:
[X] Ads of the future! Cost 5k.

Roll = 44. Pataki's first Twitter fight. Covered in Interlude 'What did we do last night?'

[X] Dinner time! Cost: 25k.

Roll = 57. Interlude 'What did we do last night?'

[X] Keeping tabs. Cost: 5k

Roll = 79. Your spy found….nothing?

[X] The Beanslide begins. Cost: 15k

Roll = 71. It begins.

[X] Catching Tumbleweeds. Cost 12k

Roll = 30. Failed. Harry is busy with....whatever the crap he's planning on doing to Scott Walker.

PATAKI ACTIONS
[X] Practice debate. Free

Roll = 41. All is normal. +10

[X] Practice Issue familiarity. Free

Roll = 47. All is normal. +10

[X] Brushing up old contacts. Cost: 10K

Roll = 38. Endorsements secured in IA. Rep. Steve King.

[X] Prepare a speech. Cost: 10k

Roll = 71. 'Pataki blasts Trump in Iowa! Huge Twitter feud! More at 11!'

LIBBY PATAKI ACTIONS

[X] Raise money. Cost: Free.

Roll = 62. +65k Campaign. +340k SuperPAC

JAMES TODD SMITH

[X] Can you spare half a dollar?. Cost: 15k
Roll = 87. 50 cent endorses. Will assist in campaign, at an undefined future date.

I'll get to writing the update. See youse later!
 
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Nice rolls, no failures from what I can see.
The Trump vs. Pataki fight should benefit us a lot. Getting more coverage is always nice.
 
Huh, so what did we do last night?
While my not-wife and I where having dinner with the Rock and his family, a 70 year old politician, incidentally the most hip candidate that the Republicans have to offer learnt to use Twitter and the first thing he managed to do was get into a brutal twitter knife fight with a man who styles his hair like a cat.
Sound about right?

Also lets see that SuperPAC roll.
 
Dark as Silver said:
While my not-wife and I where having dinner with the Rock and his family, a 70 year old politician, incidentally the most hip candidate that the Republicans have to offer learnt to use Twitter and the first thing he managed to do was get into a brutal twitter knife fight with a man who styles his hair like a cat.
Sound about right?
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Yeah, more or less.

Dark as Silver said:
Also lets see that SuperPAC roll.
Click to expand...
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Shhh. It's a secret!
 
@The Karvoka Man

I think you forgot
[] Catching tumbleweeds. You don't really have infrastructure there, but Harry insists it isn't needed, for a small price, he can get some interns to start reporting on the situation in Nevada. It's the fourth state up, and if you want this campaign to be anything more than a swansong for the moderate wing of the Republican party, you need to start plan ahead. Far ahead. (Cost: 12k. Chance of Success: 60%
from the rolls.

Edit was just looking up Steve King because on the first read though I thought it said Steven King... this guy is popular in Iowa, but well he has some rather extreme right wing views and a tendency to run his mouth and say something stupid...
 
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tygerbright said:
[] Catching tumbleweeds. You don't really have infrastructure there, but Harry insists it isn't needed, for a small price, he can get some interns to start reporting on the situation in Nevada. It's the fourth state up, and if you want this campaign to be anything more than a swansong for the moderate wing of the Republican party, you need to start plan ahead. Far ahead. (Cost: 12k. Chance of Success: 60%
from the rolls.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

Roll = 30. Failed. Harry is busy with....whatever the crap he's planning on doing to Scott Walker.

Thanks for the catch, I'll chuck it into the turn results.
 
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Turn 5. Results
  • Threadmarks
    • CAMPAIGN ACTIONS:
    [X] Ads of the future! Cost 5k.

    Roll = 44. Pataki's first Twitter fight. Covered in Interlude 'What did we do last night?'

    [X] Dinner time! Cost: 25k.

    Roll = 57. Interlude 'What did we do last night?'

    [X] Keeping tabs. Cost: 5k

    Roll = 79. Your spy found….nothing?

    Well….out of all the shit you were expecting Harry's spy to find, nothing is the last thing. Trump doesn't seem to be really running a proper campaign. There is very, very minimal infrastructure. Hell, Trump HQ is pretty much a shambles. Even worse than your HQ, and that's saying something. They also seem to be running on Trump's cash, as opposed to donations. You aren't sure what to make of that either. It's a good thing, you guess? But if he's doing this good without properly organising his damn campaign, what can he do if he does?!

    [X] The Beanslide begins. Cost: 15k

    Roll = 71. It begins.

    You've made a note to never trust Harry with your computer. He's gotten creepy as shit since you gave him carte-blanche (and fifteen thousand dollars) for this little pet project of his. All you know at this stage, is that 'it begins'. You know that because he sent a goddamn unmarked all-caps email to your desk saying that, and only that. Goddamn creepy bastard.You need to deal with that before he does something you'll regret.


    [X] Catching Tumbleweeds. Cost 12k

    Roll = 30. Failed. Harry is busy with....whatever the crap he's planning on doing to Scott Walker.

    Unfortunately, it looks like this obsession might be getting the better of Harry, this week at least, as he's more or less forgotten to start polling Nevada. He's done a bit, and he does apologise. Apparently it's been hard to get going, but he promises he'll get working on it next week (Action locked next turn, will be completed for 10k.)

    PATAKI ACTIONS
    [X] Practice debate. Free

    Roll = 41. All is normal. +10

    Well, gearing up for the debates continues apace! Soon you'll be ready for the big stage. Or, more accurately, Pataki will be. Especially after his spat with Donald Trump on Twitter, you need him ready and raring to go.

    [X] Practice Issue familiarity. Free

    Roll = 47. All is normal. +10

    You are starting to get more heavily into domestic issues, touching bases with manufacturing numbers, tax rates, and that kind of thing. Hammering out a plan for debate night that emphasises your platform of putting America before political squabbles.

    [X] Brushing up old contacts. Cost: 10K

    Roll = 38. Endorsements secured in IA. Rep. Steve King.

    Pataki spent his cool off time in Iowa with Steve King, and after a few days, you got the good new. King has thrown his lot in with you, and will be helping the ground Campaign in Iowa. He's certainly popular enough that this should make some kind of difference! Hopefully, at least.

    [X] Prepare a speech. Cost: 10k

    Roll = 71. 'Pataki blasts Trump in Iowa! Huge Twitter feud! More at 11!'

    Well, the speech certainly went over well! Well enough, at least. It's certainly caused a stir, though. Been getting a looooooot of air-time, to boot! Air-time you don't have to pay for. Trump has gone apoplectic, and tried hitting back over social media. Pataki was ready, though.

    "When the people of Peekskill, New York, selected me to represent them over a decade ago, they picked me because they knew nobody would fight harder to help them, than George Pataki. When the people of New York picked me, over the Liberal Lion Mario Cuomo, they picked me because they knew nobody would fight harder for New York. I stand before you as a former mayor, a former governor, but more than that, I stand before you as a father of three, and a loving husband, and ask you to put your faith in me, because I'll only make one promise on this campaign, and it's the same promise I've made in every campaign. Nobody will fight harder, or longer, than George Pataki. I'll fight for you against Foreign industries that poach our factories, I'll fight against the political establishment, that sidelines your concerns, so they can line their pockets with corporate money, and I'll fight against the businessmen who abuse our laws, who drive their companies into bankruptcy, steal jobs and government handouts. I'll fight against all of them for you, If you will honor me with that chance!"

    LIBBY PATAKI ACTIONS

    [X] Raise money. Cost: Free.

    Roll = 62. +65k Campaign. +340k SuperPAC

    Well, Libby finally came through! She's got some contacts with the Pro-Israel lobby, and apparently some of the more hawkish members, who appreciate Pataki's strident defence of Israel from 'dangerous elements' in the New York legislature, and in American politics. They've finally decided to pay you back, in your favourite method! Cold, hard cash.

    JAMES TODD SMITH

    [X] Can you spare half a dollar?. Cost: 15k
    Roll = 87. 50 cent endorses. Will assist in campaign, at an undefined future date.
    Well, you actually didn't find out about this until two days after the endorsement dropped, because you were recovering from dinner with the Rock and family. And a bunch of wrestlers. Goddammit your head will never be the same again. On the bright side, people have already started talking about how Pataki is the 'hip' candidate. You are certainly more popular with the youth of america than the average 70 year old white guy! So that's good. Young people don't vote as reliably, and certainly not republican but hey, you'll take what you can get.

    SuperPAC roll = 85. Building up to something big.

    The SuperPAC guy has been oddly quiet all week. Apparently he's got something that he's put together, but he won't say what. If it's anything like the last time they did this, you're very, very excited. He won't clarify, just saying it involves some of your endorsers. He won't say who they are, though.
     
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  • Threadmarks
    • butchock said:
    now to just make sure those damn kids vote Pataki come election day...
    Click to expand...
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    Actually, that'd be a good idea for a campaign. Get our younger folks out there and moving. Considering that the comparisons with Sanders are going to be inevitable (even if it's only on the basis of being old and white), it'd be good to get the identity of encouraging young voters to meet up, make groups, picket signs, whatever.

    To extend on that, our own knowledge is woefully inadequate. I mean, casting off Bernie Sanders is *really* not gonna work if people are just gonna call us copies (and people are gonna be stupid enough to do so). It'd actually be nice to get some West Coast representation, right after Sanders, and push the idea of a balanced and fiscally responsible President. Sanders proposes old white dude as your leader who'll actully represent you, and WE become the just-as-popular, race friendly, fiscally responsible WHILE STILL BEING socially liberal, makes us a magical candidate for anyone who thinks beyond "More Taxes!" and "Less Taxes!".
     
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    Getting young people off their asses would be a major accomplishment. I can barely get of mine when I have nothing to do and all the time of the day.
     
    Dark as Silver said:
    [X] Write an election rap.
    Click to expand...
    Click to shrink...

    Here's a shitty little ditty election rap for you. Pretend LL Cool J is doing the bulk with Chamillionaire and Rock just popping up. Full disclosure though, I don't listen to rap and I've never heard any of those three men musically.

    *shudder* I need to stick to Quest Writing.

    Now this is the story all about how,
    My life got flipped, turned upside down
    Please let me explain, just sit with me
    And hear how I became a campaign manager for George Pataki

    Smoking, not joking and there came the call
    Went asked if I could run with the ball
    To take my main man all the way with a game plan

    Now no lying, no fronting, especially not here,
    But when I said yes, man I needed a beer

    Pataki's old school, real school, all class, no sass,
    But I ain't a fool, not even an ass,
    Btween Jeb and Scott we'll be fighting a lot,
    And that's leaving aside all the other little toddler tots.

    Tying with Carly makes me want to toke up with Marly,
    Cruz's got me wishing I could trade with ICarly,
    Little Marky's malfunctioning,
    Big Chris is food-functioning,
    Mrs. Graham is Chicken Littlin',
    And that's leaving aside all the other Zero-Star Michelins

    But if we talking no class, if we spotting an ass,
    Then who's there around, but Mr. Orange Spray Tan?

    (Chamillion Starts)

    Little Donny from New York, about as trashy as Norfolk,
    What's to say that hasn't been about that has-been, man?

    All Ego, All Flash,
    Bad Business, Crooked Cash
    Little Hands, Little Man
    Running Up In Here With No Plan,
    Just Because He's His Only Own Fan.

    (Chamillion finishes)

    So take a step back, and just look at the cracks,
    In these glasshouses they be throwing stones at.

    Now Pataki's not perfect,
    But he's the man of the hour, he can't go sour,
    He's not lemons or lime,
    But compared to everyone else?
    He's simply sublime.

    (Rock pops up)

    Can ya SMELL What Pataki's Cookin'?

    Dunno, maybe blame it on Parker or have it be an ironic rap some fan tries to make like Obama Girl or whatever.
     
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    Droman said:
    Here's a shitty little ditty election rap for you. Pretend LL Cool J is doing the bulk with Chamillionaire and Rook just popping up. Full disclosure though, I don't listen to rap and I've never heard any of those three men musically.

    *shudder* I need to stick to Quest Writing.

    Now this is the story all about how,
    My life got flipped, turned upside down
    Please let me explain, just sit with me
    And hear how I became a campaign manager for George Pataki

    Smoking, not joking and there came the call
    Went asked if I could run with the ball
    To take my main man all the way with a game plan

    Now no lying, no fronting, especially not here,
    But when I said yes, man I needed a beer

    Pataki's old school, real school, all class, no sass,
    But I ain't a fool, not even an ass,
    Btween Jeb and Scott we'll be fighting a lot,
    And that's leaving aside all the other little toddler tots.

    Tying with Carly makes me want to toke up with Marly,
    Cruz's got me wishing I could trade with ICarly,
    Little Marky's malfunctioning,
    Big Chris is food-functioning,
    Mrs. Graham is Chicken Littlin',
    And that's leaving aside all the other Zero-Star Michelins

    But if we talking no class, if we spotting an ass,
    Then who's there around, but Mr. Orange Spray Tan?

    (Chamillion Starts)

    Little Donny from New York, about as trashy as Norfolk,
    What's to say that hasn't been about that has-been, man?

    All Ego, All Flash,
    Bad Business, Crooked Cash
    Little Hands, Little Man
    Running Up In Here With No Plan,
    Just Because He's His Only Own Fan.

    (Chamillion finishes)

    So take a step back, and just look at the cracks,
    In these glasshouses they be throwing stones at.

    Now Pataki's not perfect,
    But he's the man of the hour, he can't go sour,
    He's not lemons or lime,
    But compared to everyone else?
    He's simply sublime.

    (Rock pops up)

    Can ya SMELL What Pataki's Cookin'?

    Dunno, maybe blame it on Parker or have it be an ironic rap some fan tries to make like Obama Girl or whatever.
    Click to expand...
    Click to shrink...
    Its everything I could have asked for.
     
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