Hereafter [Worm x Fate/Grand Order]

Chapter CXXII: Parole Party
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And now that the shameless plugging is out of the way...

Chapter CXXII: Parole Party

Waiting for us in the cafeteria was a large banner proclaiming, "Welcome back, Ritsuka!" in the same sort of big, bold font you might expect from a birthday party. It hung from the ceiling, attached there through no visible means I could immediately see — I think Marie might actually have had a stroke if someone had gone as far as to drill in hooks to hang it from — and suspended above a set of tables that had been pushed together to form one longer table. To disguise this, someone had thrown a tablecloth over them, which was itself decorated with patterns of stars and confetti.

Maybe someone really had originally made it for birthday parties. I couldn't see Marie approving, which would definitely be a good reason for me to never have seen it before.

Sat atop the table were a series of plates, one for each chair arrayed around it, and at the one end was a cart bearing a large cake. "Congratulations!" was written upon it in curling capital letters, blue on white, and multicolored streaks raced away from them like an explosion, ending in little starbursts at seemingly random distances.

Also, every single one of our Servants was there, and I think the only reason why the rest of the staff hadn't been brought along was because some of them actually had jobs they needed to be taking care of and some of them were in need of sleep.

"What the —" Marie began.

As though she had been waiting for just that moment, Jeanne Alter blew on the noisemaker clenched between her teeth, and it bleated loudly like a deflating balloon.

Marie growled, "Why you…!"

Around her noisemaker, Jeanne Alter smirked.

"Is this all for me?" Ritsuka asked in a small voice.

"Of course, Master!" Bradamante answered like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Don't read too much into it," El-Melloi II warned. I wasn't sure how he could stand here and say that with a straight face.

"It's a bit slapdash," said Arash, smiling, "but yes, it's all for you, Ritsuka."

"It was his idea," said Aífe, jerking her thumb at Arash. "He said that we should do something to celebrate the fact you came out of your ordeal safe and sound, and El-Melloi II said that sounded like some kind of party."

"You make it sound like I was the one who suggested it," El-Melloi II said sourly. "I was just making an observation."

"But it was a very good observation!" Bradamante insisted.

"So I brought the idea to Emiya," said Arash, "and he suggested bringing all of the Servants in for it, since none of us could do anything to help you out when you needed it. This was the least we could do."

"Speak for yourself," drawled Jeanne Alter. "While you sorry shits were sitting around going, 'oh, woe is me, for my Master is trapped and cannot escape,' I was in there with him taking asses and kicking names."

"I think the phrase is actually kicking asses and taking names," Siegfried interrupted politely.

Jeanne Alter grinned. "I know what I said."

"And we all agreed," said Hippolyta. "To make up for our inability to come to your aid, we would host a party for you celebrating your triumphant return. Even those of us who are not properly your Servant decided it was the best way to make it up to you."

"After all," Sam added, "we're all on the same team, here, right? You might not hold everyone's contract, Ritsuka, but these guys are all your friends and comrades."

"People who have fought alongside you," said Aífe. "People who have shed blood on the same battlefield, fighting the same enemies."

"Some more metaphorically than others," muttered El-Melloi II.

"So even if we were a little rushed," Arash concluded, "it comes from the heart."

Ritsuka's eyes watered. He looked like he was holding back tears. "You guys…" he said hoarsely.

"And you didn't think to ask permission?" Marie demanded furiously. "This is a public space! You can't just go hanging whatever decorations you like wherever you want! People have to eat here!"

Arash winced. "Ah. Well, about that…"

"I think we can let it slide, in this case," said Romani. He looked at Marie. "Don't you, Director? After all, nothing was destroyed and no one was hurt by this."

Marie scoffed and folded her arms. "It's the principle of the thing!" she insisted sourly.

"The thing that amazes me," said Da Vinci, "is how you all got this put together so quickly! We hadn't even announced Ritsuka's recovery to the rest of the facility yet, but you've already decorated here — if somewhat sparsely — and prepared a cake for the occasion."

"That would be my doing!" Shakespeare proclaimed proudly. He bent into a theatrical bow. "When Master awoke earlier this morning, I set about informing all who would listen about his safe return from the jaws of death! The harrowing tale of his adventures through the perilous Château d'If and the horrors that awaited inside of it! His courageous triumph over impossible odds in the most treacherous prison ever forged by man!"

I wonder how much of it he embellished. There was no way he'd stayed around for the whole story, not to make it here quickly enough for Emiya to bake a cake. Not unless he'd been doing something he should have told us about, like using his Noble Phantasm to watch what was happening to Ritsuka inside of that curse.

That would have been very handy to have while we were all worrying about whether or not Ritsuka would even come out of that thing alive, let alone intact.

Da Vinci shrugged. "Well, that explains that, I suppose."

"Or enough of it, at least," Romani agreed. He looked about the room. "I don't see Emiya, though. He's the one who made the cake, isn't he?"

"I'm finishing breakfast!" Emiya called from the kitchen. "No one touch the cake yet! You'll spoil your appetite!"

Rika, who looked like she'd been eager to dive into the cake, let out a long, disappointed groan. "What are you, my mom?"

"It would be an upgrade from house-husband!"

Romani laughed even as Rika poked her tongue out in the direction of the kitchen. "I'm all for having your dessert before dinner, Rika, but considering how little you've been eating the last few days, I think this one time you really should listen to Emiya."

Ritsuka blinked and looked over at Romani. "How little she's been eating?"

"Ahaha!" Rika laughed awkwardly. "It's nothing, Onii-chan! Just a joke! He's kidding!"

"We were all worried, Senpai," said Mash, completely ignoring the look of mounting panic that was stretching across Rika's face. "But Senpai was worried most of all. She refused to leave your side the whole three days, except for, u-um, you know, the n-necessities."

Ritsuka turned to his sister, whose face had at first gone white, but was now so red that the only thing she could do was try and hide in her hands. It did nothing to hide her ears, however, the tips of which were red enough to make her hair seem pale and washed out.

"She did?"

"She was the first to volunteer when we started suggesting methods of mounting a rescue operation as well," Da Vinci told him, and by the smile curling her lips, she knew exactly what she was doing to Rika.

"And she was very angry with us when we decided we couldn't afford to jump into that sort of thing without being sure it was the right decision," Romani added.

"Stop!" Rika moaned.

"Your sister cares about you a great deal, Ritsuka," said Arash, smiling, "so make sure you always come back to her, okay?"

Ritsuka smiled and nodded. "Yeah!"

Rika just groaned, hunching over as though she could disappear into her palms. "You're all the worst!" she said through her hands.

I didn't think it was very funny, but several people, including Romani and Da Vinci, smiled and laughed at the interplay. Maybe there were some old biases sneaking back in, but it felt a little too much like Winslow and the times when Emma had used the secrets I'd confided in her against me. Particularly the stuff about my mom.

Of course, Emma was long gone, and I didn't even know if Sophia had survived Gold Morning. Madison? I hadn't heard anything about her since before Leviathan. The people were long since irrelevant, and their petty school politicking inconsequential, but that didn't mean I couldn't remember how it had felt at the time to be on the receiving end.

It turned out, however, I didn't need to step in on Rika's behalf, because someone else did it for me.

"I'm going to butt my nose into things here," Emiya announced as he wheeled another cart laden with food towards the table, "and save my poor Master from some well-deserved teasing. Breakfast is ready — a bit heavier than usual for a morning meal, but those of you with stomachs that don't just convert whatever you eat into magical energy, you might thank me later when it's time for the cake."

Like some kind of caterer, he went about placing plates of delicious smelling food at each of the chairs arrayed around the table, saying all the while, "Circumstances have thrown our usual Servant meal day schedule off course, so I took the liberty of bending things around for today. There's enough for everyone."

"And exactly enough chairs around this table to sit everyone," Da Vinci noted wryly.

"Of course," said Emiya. "There's a lot of things I don't care about as a Heroic Spirit, but if there's one thing I'll take pride in, it's my cooking. You should know by now that I don't halfass it."

"Next time, ask permission before you adjust the schedule," Marie ordered grumpily. She picked out a chair and slid into it, and that seemed to be the cue for everyone else as well, so we all picked out a spot to sit down for breakfast.

As I should have expected, there were exactly enough chairs for all of us, and not one spare or missing.

"Apologies, Director," said Emiya, "but Ritsuka's recovery was sudden, so this entire thing is short notice. There wasn't any time to ask permission to alter the schedule."

"Which is exactly why I'm letting it slide, this time!" she replied.

Emiya chuckled. "Of course, Director."

"I can't say I have any experience with modern food," said Hippolyta, "but it looks quite tasty."

"Oh, just wait!" Bradamante gushed from beside her. "Sir Emiya's food is on a completely different level! I promise you, once you've had a taste, you'll be spoiled for anyone else's food, no matter how good they are."

"I don't know if I'd go that far," said Bellamy from her other side, "but this guy's definitely good. I had a chance to try his food before, back in that Singularity, and man, he could cook for royalty!"

"High praise, coming from the Prince of Pirates," said Emiya.

A huff of air escaped my nostrils, not quite a snort, and when a plate was set down in front of me, I picked up my utensils and dug in.

It was just as good as always. The way the chicken all but disintegrated in my mouth, the tangy flavor of the sauce that clung to the rice, the finely diced mushrooms that gave it that little extra burst — I wouldn't say so out loud, but just for this, I was glad to have Emiya back.

I had to get his recipes before this was all over. I was only a halfway decent chef, had never made anything particularly complicated, but a halfway decent chef following instructions from a guy who could cook like this would still beat out pizza and takeout any day of the week.

As we all ate, the group descended into a murmur of disjointed conversations, each person striking up a conversation with their neighbors as they enjoyed another amazing meal made by Emiya. Da Vinci, Romani, and Marie had put their heads together and were discussing something quietly, casting the occasional furtive glance at the rest of the group. I was sure I would find out what that was about later. Shakespeare had enraptured Bellamy and Hippolyta (and Bradamante, by virtue of how close she was to the other two) with a dramatic retelling of Ritsuka's adventures in Château d'If, completely with exaggerated motions of his fork and knife, as though he was waving about a sword.

There was almost certainly something going on there that he hadn't told us about earlier. If he really had hid from us exactly how closely he could observe what was going on, then I was definitely going to have to have a talk with him. Maybe when I went to see what that multi-volume book set was all about and why he didn't want me to look too closely at it.

El-Melloi II, Aífe, and Siegfried, however, seemed content to simply eat and watch the rest of us. El-Melloi II had even set his lollipop off to the side on his plate while he ate, and I couldn't help wondering what his meal had to taste like with that sugary flavor still sitting on his tongue.

Arash, fittingly, had chosen to sit next to me, smiling a little, his eyes glittering as he took in the atmosphere. Satisfied at a job well done, if I had to guess, and I suppose he really had earned it, since he had basically put this all together.

You really arranged all of this for Ritsuka's sake? I asked him as I ate my own meal.

He paused, glancing at me, and then kept eating. For Ritsuka, but also for everyone else, he replied. Things have been tense, and no one was able to do anything about what was happening. With the simulator still unable to account for Servants and Noble Phantasms, there weren't many ways for us all to blow off steam.

And so he'd come up with this, a way for everyone to get a bit of a cathartic relief from that pressure. A way to bring the whole group together and unite everyone for an hour or two where they could let loose a little, and maybe do a bit of bonding.

I wished I'd thought of it. That this sort of thing came as naturally to me as it seemed to him.

Thank you, I told him.

He glanced at me again and smiled. Anytime, Taylor.

Once breakfast was over and we'd all had our fill, there was a bit of a lull, where everyone just talked about one thing or another. Ritsuka wound up telling the story of what had actually happened to him in Château d'If, sans Shakespeare's embellishments, complete with snide remarks from Jeanne Alter. Everyone took it in stride, like she wasn't doing anything unusual, because in a way, she wasn't.

It was frankly kind of remarkable. How she'd gone from an outsider to part of the group that quickly and easily, just because she'd been there to help Ritsuka when the rest of us couldn't. A single battle in Okeanos, one night watching a movie together, and an adventure with her Master — like that, she was an ally, and everyone seemed to have come to accept her eccentricities as part of her personality.

During the whole thing, Aífe only reached over to smack her on the back of the head once.

And now that it was over, we were laughing about it. Telling jokes. Just a day ago, most of us hadn't been sure if he was going to even survive, and now, everyone smiled and grinned and congratulated him for his bravery and daring, as though there had never been any doubt that he would conquer every one of the trials of Château d'If and come back to us. It honestly felt a little surreal.

But I guess these were all Servants. Heroic Spirits. The resurrected remnants of the exalted dead. Although the details were new, each and every single one of them had done stuff like this before and triumphed over it, including me. None of them were truly frightened or appalled — even if Bradamante and Mash gasped at the appropriate points — because once upon a time, they'd had adventures just like it.

I guess it was true what Arash had said to me before. That it wouldn't be long before the twins had stories of their own to tell, tales of their own daring-dos that would capture attention and captivate the mind of the listener. I think a part of me had expected that I would be there for all of them.

Once Ritsuka had finished telling the tale of Prison Tower on the Isle of Despair — I had a feeling that was going to be the official title on the report when it was filed — Emiya reappeared with a large, flat knife and declared that it was time for cake, to much enthusiasm. He cut the cake we'd seen earlier into perfectly even slices, one for each of us, and then started passing them out to everyone at the table.

(Mash fed a little bit of hers to her perpetual goblin. It was probably too much to hope for that the thing would get sick, and as much as we hated each other, I didn't dislike Fou enough to wish his vomit on Mash and her clothing.)

Naturally, Emiya was a good baker, too. I didn't think I could say it was quite as good as the meals he made, but it wasn't at all bad either. Sweet, but not too sweet, with just enough icing to enhance the flavor without making you sick of it by the time you finished eating. Simple, but satisfying.

Eventually, however, our little party had to come to an end, and Marie stood up and smashed her hands together loudly. The entire table fell silent.

"Alright," she said when she was sure she had everyone's attention, "we can't stay here all day, because some of us have responsibilities we have to get back to —"

Romani sighed.

"— so I'm officially calling an end to this!" She turned a stern look on Ritsuka. "I'll be expecting a report on the entire incident to go along with your report on the Okeanos Singularity. Everyone else," she added, "you can return to your normal routines until it's time for the briefing on the next Singularity, as long as you aren't cluttering up the cafeteria!"

"In other words," Emiya chimed in, smirking, "you don't have to go home, but you can't stay here."

Rika groaned and immediately turned to El-Melloi II, "Hot Pops!"

"You've already missed out on three days of lessons," he said mercilessly, predicting her request, and when her face fell, a grin curled on his lips, "so I don't see what one more day will hurt."

Rika's face lifted with hope, and her mouth pulled wide.

"I won't make you train on a full stomach," Aífe said, "but I fully expect to see you in the gym tomorrow morning, you two. You especially, Ritsuka, to make up for what you lost in bed for the last few days."

Rika's smile died again almost as soon as it was born, and she sagged in her chair. "Ugh!"

Ritsuka only sighed. "Right. I'll make sure we'll be there."

Aífe nodded. "See that you do."

She and El-Melloi II were the first to leave, followed shortly by Siegfried, who offered a short, but earnest, "I am glad to see you recovered, Lord Ritsuka," before he went. Shakespeare made his "exit, stage left!" shortly afterwards, cackling to himself about what a great story this whole thing would make. Hippolyta politely excused herself not long after, and then Da Vinci, Romani, and Marie all went, too.

"As fun as this has all been, there were several projects I happened to be in the middle of before this fiasco," Da Vinci said, "so I'm going to get back to those now. Ciao, everyone!"

And she was gone.

"Yeah, I guess we do have things we kind of need to get back to, huh?" Romani said with the air of a man walking to his death. "Man, even being Vice Director has a lot of responsibilities attached, doesn't it?"

"You're the only one qualified for the position," Marie told him. "It's only natural that I should give you that sort of responsibility."

Romani laughed self-deprecatingly. "Well, when you put it that way…"

"You can do it, Doc!" Rika cheered for him.

"Fou-fou! Fou-kyu-kyu fou fou!" the gremlin echoed. Mash scratched under his chin, to his delight.

"Fou is saying, we believe in you, Doctor Roman," she translated. "So give it your best, okay?"

Romani smiled. "With an endorsement like that, I guess I don't have any other choice, huh?"

Marie looked as though she very much wanted to roll her eyes, but managed to suppress the impulse at least long enough to make it out into the hallway first.

With most of us gone, there wasn't much reason to hang around, so with a promise to see the twins and Mash later on for lunch and then dinner, I excused myself and left.

It was tempting to head off to the library and try to look up some more information about King Solomon and his Demon Gods, but I was pretty sure I'd exhausted what little there was a while ago. Looking back on it, it was entirely possible that the reason I was having so much trouble finding anything that wasn't locked behind Marisbury's access codes was because Flauros had removed or destroyed anything really important while he was here hiding in Lev's body, to make sure that we had as little to go on as possible and couldn't prepare for a direct confrontation. It was the sort of thing I would have done in their place.

Frustrating. Doubly so because there wasn't anything I could do about it one way or the other.

I'd missed my morning workout, so I resolved to catch up on it later in the afternoon once my food had had a chance to digest and went back to my room to sit down with a novel. Without anything else to do much research on, it was the only thing I really could do with my time.

After the panic and the agony of waiting that the last few days had been, it felt a little odd to go back to the mundanity of life at Chaldea between deployments. I'd spent almost the entirety of the last three days on metaphorical pins and needles, so it was kind of strange to lose that urgency and that undercurrent as I went about my day.

Although I wouldn't say I'd forgotten about that dream I'd had, the one about racing through the Birdcage to rescue Ritsuka. That… If Doctor Yamada was around, I would have probably gone to her about it, just to make sure the air was clear and so was my conscience, but since the only person even resembling a mental healthcare professional currently in Chaldea was Romani, who was overworked on the best of days, there wasn't much I could do except try and convince myself that everything was fine and it didn't mean anything. Just the stress getting to me.

I wasn't sure what it said that the dream had smushed together my past and my present the way it had and I honestly wasn't sure I wanted to know. It probably just meant I missed my friends, and I already knew that. I didn't need a psychiatrist to figure that out.

Nonetheless, by the time dinner rolled around, nothing had happened. There was no new emergency making a play for our attention and no one had been ensnared by a curse by any of the enemies we'd defeated during our times deployed. Aside from that morning, it was a completely normal day at Chaldea, and I was actually kind of glad it wound up so boring.

I still left Muninn on the shelf in Ritsuka's room, just to make sure he didn't relapse overnight. Everyone seemed to have forgotten she was there, and I would keep her there until I was sure there wasn't anything to worry about — a day, maybe two or three on the long end — then, I'd retrieve her without anyone being any the wiser.

I made sure to look away during private moments, of course, by deliberately turning my attention away from Muninn's senses whenever he started reaching for any of the buttons, zippers, or hems on his clothing. Just because I was worried about him after the ordeal of the last few days didn't mean I was going to completely disregard his privacy.

Fortunately, nothing happened. Muninn didn't alert me to any abnormalities throughout the night, and Ritsuka went to bed and woke up without any trouble at all. It seemed the curse really was well and truly broken.

I snuck Muninn out the next morning while he was training with Aífe. Just so I wasn't tempted to leave her in there for another week.

The day after Ritsuka woke up from his coma, things had returned completely to normal. We all went back to our routines — a morning workout in the gym, supervised by Aífe, followed by a hearty breakfast cooked by our resident professional chef, and then a few hours of relaxation until lunchtime, and later on in the afternoon, while the twins were off having a lesson in magecraft fundamentals with El-Melloi II, Marie and I met Mash at the pool for another swimming lesson.

As he had every day since they started, Fou decided to tag along, still in that ridiculously oversized jersey and still with that annoying whistle of his. It was hard to say exactly how intelligent that thing was, but I was beginning to suspect that he was doing it just to get on my nerves. The frustrating part was that it was working.

On the bright side, Mash was coming along well and picking up how to swim with speed. Considering that was the main point behind these lessons, I decided I was going to take my wins on that front where I could. Let the little gremlin have his fun, as long as Mash was having hers. I'd dealt with a lot pettier nonsense from people who really knew how to hurt me, so I wasn't going to let him get to me.

Sorry, Fou, but if you were trying to get under my skin, you were going to have to try a lot harder than that.

Soon enough, it was time to call it quits for the day again, and the three of us climbed out of the pool to dry off. I would never say so aloud, but despite how classy and tasteful her swimsuit was, Marie looked a little silly in her swim cap and goggles. Like the stereotypical aliens in pre-cape B-movies almost, although I suppose I probably didn't look all that much different.

It gave me a distraction not to think about Mash, now that Ritsuka's issue was dealt with, so that I didn't have to remember how much Marisbury had taken from her and how much would be taken from her in the not so distant future.

"It really isn't as hard as I was afraid it would be," Mash commented cheerfully.

"You're doing well," I told her. "You're a real natural at this, Mash."

She smiled at me. "That's only because I have such great teachers, Miss Taylor. You and the Director seem to know just how to explain everything so I can understand it!"

Privately, I didn't really think that was true. I was trying to teach her by mimicking the lessons the Wards had way back when, but as with most government programs, those lessons had only been designed to cover the bases and nothing more. If I hadn't already had a decently solid foundation, I didn't think I would have learned much of anything in them, and the fact that Mash was getting as much out of my own poor imitations as she was had to have had as much to do with her own talent as it did Marie shoring up my gaps.

A complicated expression crossed Marie's face. "And…you're having fun?"

Mash blinked for a second, and then she smiled again. "Yes, I think I am! I know it's an important skill I need to have in case a situation arises during a deployment inside a Singularity, but it's actually really fun, too!"

The shrill blare of a sports whistle blew, and the little gremlin came trotting up to us, letting out another sharp trill with every bounce of his paws as he bounded over. Mash, unbothered, reached down to let him jump up onto her arm and hop up to her shoulder.

"Don't worry, Fou," she told him, "I know you'd come to rescue me if I was in trouble."

I tried to imagine it jumping into the pool to waddle out and rescue a struggling Mash, and the mental image was so ridiculous that I actually wanted to laugh.

"It'll be dinnertime soon enough," I announced. "We should all go clean up and get ready."

"Of course!" said Mash. She gave me and the Director a polite bow. "Thank you for another lesson, Miss Taylor, Director! I look forward to our next one tomorrow!"

"Tomorrow," I echoed.

And she turned around and left. Fou looked back at me from his perch, pinning me with his beady little eyes for a few seconds, and then turned back around and ignored me as he and Mash disappeared down the hallway.

For a long moment, Marie and I stood there in silence, interrupted only by the sloshing of the pool and the hum of the filter and pumps.

Then, haltingly, Marie said, "It's…"

She trailed off. I didn't need her to finish. Not when I was having the same conflicted thoughts, wanting to be happy for Mash but struggling because I knew what awaited her in about a year and a half. The shadow that clung to these moments of simple joy.

"Yeah."

There was nothing else either of us could say, so we left the pool room and went back to our own rooms to shower and get ready for dinner. Expectedly, when I walked into the cafeteria about an hour later, it was to find Emiya had made another delicious meal, and I sat with the twins and Mash as we all ate and enjoyed it, them tired from their lesson with El-Melloi II and me pleasantly worn out from my own lesson with Mash.

At least this much could be relatively uncomplicated. Rika and Emiya, it seemed, still hadn't managed to patch things up between them, but I gave them some leeway on account of what the last half a week had been like and resolved to give them another few days to work things out. If and when I needed to intervene, well, I'd work out the details then. Something told me it wouldn't be as simple as locking them in a room together until they ironed everything out.

Halfway through dinner, four communicators chimed, and I shared a confused look with the twins and Mash as we all answered it to find a message from Da Vinci. Short, simple, and perfectly vague, it read:

I have a surprise for you all tomorrow! But I'll need your Mystic Code modules first, so please bring them down to my workshop before bed tonight, okay?

I glanced at the twins, but they just looked back at me, equally befuddled, no more aware of what this surprise might be than I was.

Whatever it was, knowing Da Vinci, it would either be incredibly thoughtful or incredibly ridiculous. Or maybe both at once.
— o.0.O.O.0.o —​
I didn't have a better title in mind, and all of the other ones I could think of might have eventually wound up better suited to a later chapter with different content and themes to work with, so I pitched this one and it worked well enough for my purposes.

I thought about letting you guys in on what the secret would be at the end of the chapter, but I think it works better as a cliffhanger this way. Builds a little suspense and tension so everyone can wonder for a little while.

This isn't a big, bombastic, attention-grabbing way of getting back into things after the last two weeks, but next week is the first of a two-parter (totaling in at over 15000 words!) that I think everyone will enjoy, so I think that can be forgiven.
Next — Chapter CXXIII: Standing on Golden Sands
"Stop trying to cover yourself and change back already!"
 
I'd missed my morning workout, so I resolved to catch up on it later in the afternoon once my food had had a chance to digest and went back to my room to sit down with a novel. Without anything else to do much research on, it was the only thing I really could do with my time.
While I mostly liked the chapter, even if not a lot happened, the fact that this blatantly OOC perspective keeps being included is baffling to me. What do you mean reading a novel is the only thing she can do with her time? She can talk to and learn from El Melloi II or Aife, or really any of the Servants! She has the gym! She has the simulator! Obsessive focus and training are core character traits for her! Let her work to improve, especially after an event like this!

I don't even care if she actually gets anything useful out of it in a meaningful timeframe, though it would be nice. The fact that she isn't even being allowed to try is galling.

Chapter CXXIII: Standing on Golden Sands
Beach episode?
 
While I mostly liked the chapter, even if not a lot happened, the fact that this blatantly OOC perspective keeps being included is baffling to me. What do you mean reading a novel is the only thing she can do with her time? She can talk to and learn from El Melloi II or Aife, or really any of the Servants! She has the gym! She has the simulator! Obsessive focus and training are core character traits for her! Let her work to improve, especially after an event like this!

I don't even care if she actually gets anything useful out of it in a meaningful timeframe, though it would be nice. The fact that she isn't even being allowed to try is galling.


Beach episode?
Maybe it's actually some sort of SI in Taylor's body? ;9
 
excited to see what the mystic code is, hope it's the 'switcheroo' one, cause being able to switch places between 2 servants is as much a game changer in the game as it would be in the field. plus it gives taylor more to actually do in combat, still hoping she eventually asks aife to make her more flashbang/explosion rune stones, or to teach taylor how to make them at least, she was able to do so much with them early in the story.
Maybe there were some old biases sneaking back in, but it felt a little too much like Winslow and the times when Emma had used the secrets I'd confided in her against me. Particularly the stuff about my mom.
honestly thought she was way past even thinking about emma's bullying at this point, she stopped caring about them shortly after leviathan and had mostly gotten over them by the time she was a ward, also wouldn't this remind her more of the undersiders? they did a lot of teasing each other, and taylor would definitely have seen stuff like this with them
 
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excited to see what the mystic code is, hope it's the 'switcheroo' one, cause being able to switch places between 2 servants is as much a game changer in the game as it would be in the field. plus it gives taylor more to actually do in combat, still hoping she eventually asks aife to make her more flashbang/explosion rune stones, or to teach taylor how to make them at least, she was able to do so much with them early in the story.
I've honestly forgotten about some of those things so many times that I got fed up with it and just wrote down a list of Taylor's arsenal. It's currently sitting atop the note reading "DON'T FORGET ABOUT FOU!!!" and it's going to come in handy from here on out, I can tell.

Not sure if it's just because this story is so much longer than anything else I've ever written, if it's just a consequence of not being a teenager soaking up everything so easily anymore (i.e., a natural progression of aging), or if (the one that scares me the most) it's lingering damage from when I had Covid, but I can admit that I do sometimes forget about this stuff while I'm writing.
Man it has been so long since Summer 1 for me. Can't wait to see Aife take over can lead the piggies to Industrialization.
Not a full summer event. Like I said in the notes, just two chapters. The second one, the patrons really liked, so I think everyone else will enjoy it, too.
 
"Don't worry, Fou," she told him, "I know you'd come to rescue me if I was in trouble."

I tried to imagine it jumping into the pool to waddle out and rescue a struggling Mash, and the mental image was so ridiculous that I actually wanted to laugh.
man, I wonder how she would react to Fou using some of his power during Babylonia.
That, and "Murder Merlin, FOU-KYU Merlin."
 
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This chapter: literally nothing happens, SI!Taylor continues to be passive, and sits around reading and doing absolutely nothing for the umpteenth time. Again.

Oh, and I find it hilarious that Ritsuka is now far stronger than SI!Taylor is on every level now. God, why do I keep hoping for any semblance of improvement at all? Or for SI!Taylor to train herself on any level instead of doing something other servants can do better than her instead? Learn something, prepare for the next singulaity, do fucking anything.

God, I hate the whole 'hand down to the next generation while sucking my thumb being useless' theme shoehorned into this story that is awful and done in FGO, where there's fucknothing to do but fight, at that. I desperately want to be back in France, when SI!Taylor still actually acted like Taylor and not like whoever this is.

Will she finally get photochromic lens in her glasses to help with constant explosions she can't look at? :)
Why doesn't SI!Taylor get her eyes fixed? There's zero reason not to, especially since she's fucked if her eyeglasses break in a singularity, it just makes sense.

I mean, plenty of Servants would be able to do so, as would mages. Most Casters, possibly Aife or Leonardo da Vinci, etc. Fuck, if Medea were around I'd propone going for a full body enhancement, and regrowing her arm. Taylor is a pragmaticist and martyr, she'd even toss her entire body away for the cold certainty of steel, if absolutely necessary.
 
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I admit Taylor is... not training and improving as she should.

She has access to a shitload of servant knowledge and training techniques she is just not using.

Why?
 
I admit Taylor is... not training and improving as she should.

She has access to a shitload of servant knowledge and training techniques she is just not using.

Why?

It might be that we just don't see as it is skipped ahead?
There was mention that she kept training(don't remember chapter; it had Aife there)
But there was always a mention when she went to eat or her actually eating in the cafeteria so I don't know
 
It might be that we just don't see as it is skipped ahead?
There was mention that she kept training(don't remember chapter; it had Aife there)
But there was always a mention when she went to eat or her actually eating in the cafeteria so I don't know
I don't spotlight every action Taylor does every day, and a lot of her routine is just glossed over. She's still training, she's still working out, she's still keeping in shape — but there are limits to how far even Taylor goes and how far she can go. The runes thing is brought up in a few chapters, where I reiterate that learning runes is a lot like learning a new language. Taylor has an advantage in that she has someone there who knows them well enough to teach her, but she's also at a massive disadvantage in that runic magecraft isn't a spoken language. She is not going to be making huge leaps and bounds in the span of about a month's time, and she can't speed up her learning by immersing herself in the language the way you can in real life. She's trying to learn hieroglyphics that can blow her to pieces if she does them wrong. Of course it's going slow.

Apropos of that, Taylor is not her memetic self. She does not spend every waking moment preparing, she doesn't fill her entire day with training and self-betterment. She didn't in canon either. Whenever there wasn't some crisis going on or some issue that needed her constant attention, she took breaks, she went out shopping with her friends, she read books in her off time. As part of the Wards, more of the latter than the former. She's a human, not a machine, and I don't recall if it's ever brought up in Worm, but I would think Brian, at least, would have told her how detrimental it can be to overtrain yourself.

But just because she takes an hour or two after breakfast to relax doesn't mean she isn't training at all.

Guys. The story starts in August, 2015. They're currently going into November. Of the three months it's been since the story began for them, about a third of it was spent in one Singularity or another. After Orleans, she spent most of the time until Septem training the twins. After Septem, a large portion of her focus was on Olga's recovery, so she didn't do as much training with the twins, and Waver and Aife took over their magecraft lessons and physical conditioning respectively. After Okeanos, they got a few days to relax and bring Emiya back, and then the Prison Tower happened, and now things are easing out of "we just had another minor crisis."
Oh, and I find it hilarious that Ritsuka is now far stronger than SI!Taylor is on every level now. God, why do I keep hoping for any semblance of improvement at all? Or for SI!Taylor to train herself on any level instead of doing something other servants can do better than her instead? Learn something, prepare for the next singulaity, do fucking anything.
First of all, this "SI!Taylor" thing needs to die. Violently. In a fire. Screaming and yelling and gasping for air, because it was vaguely funny when it was made as a joke, but it's insulting when you use it seriously. Secondly, I don't know where in the world you're getting the idea that Ritsuka is now far stronger than Taylor "on every level." Because he went through a traumatic, transformative experience and came away surer of himself and somewhat more confident? Because he bonded with the Servant who was stuck with him throughout the whole thing? I don't have any idea where you're getting that from those.

Thirdly, it's addressed obliquely in this chapter, but there isn't much she can do to prepare for the London, primarily because she hasn't even been told yet that the next Singularity is in London, let alone the era it's going to be taking place in, and let's not even get started on the year. The only thing the team is aware of about the next Singularity so far is that it's taking place in southern England. That's it. Considering Britain has about 2000 years of history on the shortest end, what do you expect her to study? The history of a single period in those 2000 years is something that scholars can spend lifetimes learning and studying, and Taylor isn't stupid. She knows better than to assume she can cram 200 years of history into her head in any meaningful way in just a few weeks, let alone 10x that much. She's waiting on Da Vinci and the others to let her know what era she needs to be researching.

I'm fairly sure that much is mentioned, if not here, then at some point in the next few chapters. Solomon, however, is very specifically called out in this one, because Marisbury had to be a dick and hide all the juiciest stuff about his HGW murder buddy, and Taylor has already exhausted what little is left in Chaldea's records. As she mentions.

Fourthly and lastly, nothing super exciting happened this chapter because nothing super exciting was supposed to happen. Three cooldown chapters after the Prison Tower. The whole point is for everyone — readers and characters alike — to take one, gigantic breath and let it out real slow. Ease out of the tension. Because after they're done, we're winding up for London. This is 122 (CXXII). 128 (CXXVIII) is the official start of the next Singularity. Technically earlier, since one of those chapters between now and then is an interlude showing the beginning of the London Singularity.
 
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I admit Taylor is... not training and improving as she should.

She has access to a shitload of servant knowledge and training techniques she is just not using.

Why?
Because most of it is largely useless for her or she's incapable of learning it to begin with.
It's not like she can just pick up random magecraft from Aife, AoG runes are physically beyond her, and what would learning celtic martial arts help her do, directly throw ineffectual mortal hands against superhuman punchghosts? The very thing Taylor should absolutely not be doing. This isn't teacher Aife, she doesn't have her super teaching Skills or NP to drastically accelerate student progress or teach them things they really shouldn't be physically capable of doing. Regular runes would take an absolute eternity to learn to use with any efficacy, especially when she'd only have a few hours a day (when not in a Singularity, mind you) to study and practice. If she even has the aptitude at all for that brand of magecraft.
She's still waiting on Da Vinci for her new spider puppet.
Waver could probably introduce her to some new magecraft disciplines she could try her hand at, but his strengths lie in theory not practice so there's only so much he can actually help her with. Learning magecraft is actually incredibly hard and time consuming. The only reason the twins can do anything at all is because Da Vinci is a low tier god at cranking out mystic codes.
I am waiting for Waver, being the other resident genius, to walk up to Taylor one day and be like "Formalcraft. You have the innate ability to trivialize one of the single biggest factors holding formalcraft back from being absurdly busted in the field. I've wrote up an introductory lesson plan. We're trying this." And because formalcraft scales mostly off ritual quality instead of magus quality unimpressive but highly learned mages like Waver, and potentially Taylor, can theoretically thrive in that field. Taylor still has the study time problem, but I can't get the mental image of Taylor becoming a loot goblin sending all the mob drops and rare resources she picks up back to Chaldea for her magecraft development. Marie wants Taylor to stop filling up storerooms with random junk, but Da Vinci keeps giving her shopping lists to look out for. Rika slowly turns into gatcha gremlin Gudako, while Taylor becomes a loot goblin, and Ritsuka develops into an oblivious harem protagonist. Marie begins to look longingly into the orb of eternal hell she once so desperately tried to avoid.
 
Taylor has an advantage in that she has someone there who knows them well enough to teach her, but she's also at a massive disadvantage in that runic magecraft isn't a spoken language. She is not going to be making huge leaps and bounds in the span of about a month's time, and she can't speed up her learning by immersing herself in the language the way you can in real life. She's trying to learn hieroglyphics that can blow her to pieces if she does them wrong. Of course it's going slow.
Yeah, and keeping it to handicapped 'realistic' pacing comes at the major expense of actual good storytelling. A Taylor that can't even participate in even an obliquely useful fashion to anything is a shitty one. She sits around doing nothing most of the time, is a worse tactician and strategist than any of her Servants, her insects do absolutely fucknothing, and SI!Taylor ignores most of the potential tools around her. What does her existence even change? She could be Ritsuka and nothing would be different, the details might differ slightly, but she's in the same role, doing the same fucknothing as canon Ritsuka, and so forth.

Part of the issue is your insistence on not allowing anyone with Hero-building skills around, even Aife who was retconned somehow to not be able to train anyone at any decent speed, for reasons. Nor is Taylor pursuing alternatives, like asking El-Melloi for tactical training, making equipment with insects from singularities while she's in it, or even practicing while in singularities, or what the fuck ever. Aife should have been accelerating her progress massively, but nah, gotta keep Taylor a useless cheerleader for shit reasons. Nor have we seen even the slightest improvement from her since fucking France, when the failure against the wyvern should have driven her to new heights of obsession, rather than her just giving up.

Maybe you'll let her summon Chiron or someone who can actually train her at an appreciable rate, but we all know that Taylor will always be Ritsuka or SI!Taylor, never herself. Maybe she'll be able to become a Skitter demiservant like Mash became Galahad's, literally one of very few ways to make her actually relevant as a character in her own damn story again (even if it doesn't feel like it's even her own story at this point).

Guys. The story starts in August, 2015. They're currently going into November. Of the three months it's been since the story began for them, about a third of it was spent in one Singularity or another. After Orleans, she spent most of the time until Septem training the twins. After Septem, a large portion of her focus was on Olga's recovery, so she didn't do as much training with the twins, and Waver and Aife took over their magecraft lessons and physical conditioning respectively. After Okeanos, they got a few days to relax and bring Emiya back, and then the Prison Tower happened, and now things are easing out of "we just had another minor crisis."
The problem is we never see anything, all we see is Taylor sitting around doing absolutely nothing all the time, or burning her time training the twins, which is again, a waste of her time when literally everyone else has plenty of free time to do so. I'd also much rather see her actually improve even one iota, than whittle away time meaninglessly.

Something you ignore is that there's a fucking apocalypse going on. Taylor would be burning herself on both ends to be more useful, not memetic Taylor, canon Taylor. Consider what she did during Golden Morning, or how she worked around her weaknesses in canon in far less urgent situations. Nor would she ever drink the kool-aid that non-Servants are helpless against Servants, given she spent her entire life fighting enemies that made her look like an ant in comparison, she'd try to find workarounds. At the absolute bare minimum she'd have gotten Shakespeare to bling her out a long time ago, gotten help from Servants (anything to enhance my body, my insects, etc.) and so forth.

She just doesn't act like herself at all, she has none of her impulses, goals, objectives, or anything. She acts far less than endgame Skitter, Weaver (actually more ruthless than Skitter), or Khepri and more like pre-canon Taylor, she has very weak motivations, biases, and drives, when her canon self is the exact opposite. She's completely passive, rather than proactive, accepting and trusting, rather than opinionated and biased, and so forth. This entire arc was an atrocity to her character, to never be a bystander, I don't care if it was the 'right move' when Taylor would never ever obey Olga's PRT-esque risk-based argument to abandon their teammate rather than assume a modicum of risk, the exact same shit rationale the PRT used to never fix her damn city. It's a fact she wouldn't sit around complacently, ever.

Ryuugi has some great posts on Taylor in his Sect thead.

I mean, Taylor says exactly what she regrets, just a bit earlier in Extinction 27.2, and the answer is sort of both:

I stared down at the roughly circle-shaped patch of darkness in the center of the room. "You made sacrifices, you made sacrifices on the behalf of others, and you made the hard calls, but it was all for something greater. I bet you think you won't have any regrets at the end."

"It's been some time since I lost sleep because of a heavy conscience," the Doctor said.

Weld gripped the railing hard enough to make the wood splinter explosively.

"I know what that's like," I responded. "I've walked down that road. Maybe not so ugly a road, but I've gone that route. All the way along, I told myself it sucked, but I wouldn't do it differently. I did everything I did for a reason. Except now, having reached the point I was working towards, I finally do regret it all. The last two years, the way I treated my teammates, leaving the Undersiders… I'd change it all in a heartbeat."

But she also makes clear that she wouldn't have left the Undersiders.
...

Well, first and foremost, if she hadn't met Xifeng, Taylor would have spent the last twelve years functionally alone and powerless in Shardspace, as is the inevitable fate of all Parahumans, with Taylor's biggest trauma being about isolation and being trapped--but even putting that aside, the default ending of Worm, putting aside what Wildbow said about the possibility of her just being in a coma or something, is that Taylor ends up losing everything except her father, functionally plopped down in a different world where no one knows them, and sent to live her life thus, and...two years later, the world starts to end again, with the Kronos Titan probably just suddenly appearing in Brockton Bay a few weeks before to kick things off, and there's nothing she can do about it.

For this and many other reasons, being in a bad place is kind of Taylor's default state of being--but that's kind of a flippant answer, isn't it? And it incentivizes ignoring the causes, too. So let's boil this down to the key issue, and then talk about why.

All throughout her life, both in Worm and now, Taylor is repeatedly faced with complex situations and makes choices that she goes on to regret in at least some capacity, only to do similar things again and again and again. It'd be easy to say that she doesn't learn from her mistakes, but the truth is slightly more complicated than that, so let's instead examine a different question; why doesn't Taylor change? And the answer is pretty straightforward:

Because she is consistently rewarded for not changing. Time and time again, she's faced with difficult choices, whether between being a hero and being a villain, obeying orders or disobeying orders, trying to work with other groups or going at things alone or with only her clique--and time and time again, in ways both subtle and gross, being the villain works. Her power rewards her for it, she effectuates change in a manner at least resembling what she desired, she finds herself in positions where she's happy and treated with respect, etc.

Conversely, she's punished for trying to do things the 'right' way, in whatever capacity that exists. As a hero, she struggles against a system that's specifically been undermined and is now trying to undermine her, when she obeys orders everything goes wrong, and when she tries to work with other groups, she's rejected at best and people consistently try to kill her. Probably the best team partnership experience she had was the alliance to take down the ABB, after which, basically every attempt went terrible in some fashion, whether in Coil being himself, Armsmaster nearly getting her killed against Leviathan, the Yangban seemingly destroying their defensive line (because of Simurgh context she doesn't know about) and kidnapping wounded capes, everyone refusing to work with them during the S9 fights and then outright trying to kill them. Even cases where people theoretically did work well together, like the hunt for Jack...minus Saint, are tragically undermined by, well, the fact that they failed right afterwards.

And, of course, Gold Morning. Or really, Gold Week, I suppose, since Gold Morning was just the final battle. To start with, they partially open the Birdcage, people coordinate with each other, they prepare as best they can, and then it's everyone vs. Scion!

Scion wins, fyi. The first time, I mean, on the oil rig. It goes pretty quickly, for reference, like one of those old Mike Tyson fights, only imagine his opponent is a starving four-year-old blind girl with leukemia--and after that, everything falls apart, with groups infighting and preying on each other while the world is ending.

You know what works, though? Crushing everyone to your will and acting like Darkseid with the Anti-Life Equation.

Pretty consistently throughout Worm, the way that leads into Taylor's reoccurring issues and behaviors turns out to be the right way, by virtue of working. I've seen people complain that it's even too much the case--that if the story or Wildbow's Word of Gods* or what have you wanted to say that Taylor was going to far, that she was in the wrong, that decisions she made during the warlord days and Gold Morning both were fundamentally incorrect, that there should have been better options, others should have been shown as more reasonable, and she should have had points where she was shown that alternatives did exist and were also effective, when that's just kind of not the case.

And to an extent, I kind of agree with that, even? I think the story would have benefited from making it so that Taylor was changed more on her morality, simply because I'm completely okay with Taylor being morally dubious, but a whole bunch of the situations people point to her doing bad stuff in are undermined by the fact that either nothing else was working or that everyone else sucked. Not to rag on the Ward arc, but I'm going to rag on the Ward arc, because it sucked, it was probably the worst arc in Worm for a bunch of reasons, a big one I think being the fact that it's mostly pointless. Last year, Wildbow posted this:



Which I think highlights one of the big issues with the arc, namely the fact that she doesn't do any of this with the Wards, either. Taylor joining the Wards was built up as this huge event in story; after the death of Alexandria, she has to join or the Protectorate risks crumbling apparently, and then she joins and--does busy work, mostly, until Behemoth attacks. The PRT undermines her and the Protectorate doesn't trust, so she really doesn't accomplish much of anything until Behemoth, where she's the video perspective on the most important Endbringer fight there is, and the higher ups still talk about hiding her, like that should even be a goal at that point. Even once Khonsu shows up, the only reason Taylor gets invited to the shadowy cabal to save the world--where she also makes a major difference with the Thanda--is because Lisa asked for her to be. There's no point in that chunk of the story where Taylor gets treated like she's making a difference, essentially, where it would have done a lot, even if Taylor eventually left, if it was shown she was making headway and accomplishing things and being respected and such not. Instead, well...it doesn't feel like she accomplished much of anything at all there.

But on the other hand--

I also thing it works, in a way. Or, at least, that it's tangential to working. And to explain why, let's talk about three obviously related things--Zuko, diablerie, and demon-summoning.

Everyone knows who Zuko is--or you should--but for those who don't know what diablerie is, it's a mechanic from Vampire: the Masquerade, which I think is the perfect temptation mechanic. Long story short, Vampires have a power mechanic that's vital to everything they do, which they cannot change through conventional means, all decided by their generation; fundamentally, a Tenth Gen vampire just cannot achieve the same heights as, say, an Eighth Gen Vampire, and there's nothing he can do about that...except, of course, diablerie, wherein he murders a more powerful/older vampire, consumes them completely, and rises in power. For a variety of reasons, this is extremely taboo in Vampire society, and very hard to hide, but...

Well, there's a but. Because even with that, playing a vampire, at some point you're going to think about it. Ways to do it, to hide it, to get away with it--because even with the downsides, damn if it isn't tempting.

The reason I bring this up in the context of Zuko (and demon-summoning) is...there's a reason Zuko has kind of become the modern archetype of a redemption story, and part of that is his great writing, amazing animation and voice acting, his interplay with Iroh, and the fact that Avatar was just incredible all around--but I think a good chunk is also because of the end of Season 2 into Season 3 where...Zuko gives in. He betrays Iroh's trust, he does the bad thing, and he gets everything he wanted. And it's not perfect, sure, because Azula, but he was told that if he caught the Avatar, it'd restore his honor; he caught the Avatar and his honor was restored and he was made a prince again. He got what he'd been chasing. It cost him a lot, too, and he found it wasn't worth it eventually...but he got it.

This brings us to demon-summonig. Or, I say 'demon-summoning,' but this is a Xianxia story, so you can sub in 'Unorthodox techniques,' too, or indeed, any dark route to power, because they have the same narrative role, wherein fundamentally, demon-summoning needs to be powerful in a story where it's at all relevant, or whatever replaces it needs to be, or it fails at it's purpose. It can be brutal and costly, but it should be a route to real power, because if it's not, if its worse than not doing it, then there's no moral quandary to it or temptation to use it, and therefore, you aren't taking any kind of moral stance by refusing to do it, in the same way that if you choose to use a computer instead of a typewriter, it doesn't say anything about you as a person. A lot of stories botch this in execution, arguably including Worm if in a different way than the norm by botching the consequences instead, but if it's meant to be a bad and tempting thing, you have to make it bad and tempting.

I bring this up because in a lot of ways, it's good that Taylor doing things her way gets results, as it leads her into doing those things again and it being understandable why. Taylor does cruel things, brutal things, obsesses, goes to far, and so on, and while the result is never perfect, she does get what she wants by doing so, and I think that's important. There are stories to be told about the struggles of repeating self-destructive behaviors, but for a story about doing the wrong thing for the right reasons, it's important for that option to exist, and the biggest way, the most important way, this resonates is with Khepri. Because all through Worm, Taylor tries to bridge a gap and get people to work together, and you see this all over Worm. It's set up and knocked down again and again, whether with Armsmaster or the PRT refusing to work with them against the Nine and hoping they die when the bombs drop or them refusing to respond in full to Echidna to sending the Dragoncrafts after the Undersiders instead of the Nine or any other villains, and many others. She tries to get them work together and it seems to work for a minute and then falls apart.

What's more, everywhere there's a divide between reality and the ideal. Taylor wants to be a hero, but heroism has already been fundamentally compromised by Cauldron, who essentially run and shape society in a general sense, and heroes exist to support that status quo, so she turns to villainy to effectuate change. Effectuating change breaks the Status Quo, though, so they target the Undersiders above many others, trying to destroy them, first with Dragon, then Dragon again, with bombs and subterfuge, with Tagg and Alexandria, and more. She wants to have both a cape life and a human life she can be happy with, but she isn't allowed that; she wants power, respect, and the ability to fix Brockton Bay on one side, but still wants family on the other, but inevitably, she can't have both. She wants to handle her immediate issues--Dinah, Coil, Tagg, Brockton Bay in general--and the long-term issues like the World ending without losing what she has, but she can't do that, the world won't let her.

--If not for Gold Morning, she might have gotten a Way like Duality, in the specific sense of 'the division of something perfect only in Unity,' wherein the division is inherently self-destructive, because that self-destruction is what she saw again and again. Taylor's power grows stronger when she feels isolated and trapped, and it's not a coincidence that it hit a point pretty early in Worm where it was maxed out all the time.

But Gold Morning did happen and she found out that there was a way to make everyone work together, to bridge that divide, to fix it, and finally make things work--and it's by making sure there's no divide, no discussion, nothing in her way. If people won't choose to work together, don't give them a choice; if they fight against you, crush them; if they refuse to fight, make them--anything that gets in the way, destroy; anything that holds you back, cast away; anything that resists, break.

If you do that, it turns out, you can even save the world. And love it or hate it--and Taylor hates at least parts of it--if you know that's true, you can't escape that knowledge. Taylor has a proven solution to her problems, from the small scale of becoming a warlord to the large scale of becoming a mad god, and there's consequence, but she can't make that false, can't escape the thought of it, and can't just shake her flaws and issues, because they're made true by the world, they follow her wherever she goes, and there's always the hope, the possibility, the option, the reality. That it's not justice that saved the world, or the spirit of cooperation, or human decency, or even the species' drive to survive--it was her iron-fucking-boot on the throat of the world that saw it through the end of days.

And no matter what she does, that knowledge shapes her destiny--the knowledge that it works. It wasn't her open hand that saved the day, it was her clenched fist.

I just feel like we're forgetting an important series of events that were on-going at the time, you know? Like, anyone who thinks Taylor's moral clean in all her decisions is delusional, she makes a bunch of brutal, terrible decisions--but Gold Morning was not one of them, because the fucking world was ending. If you want that decision to be morally dubious, present clear alternatives in story and/or don't make the decision so massively, wildly successful on every front, you know?

Taylor's had plenty of friends, and believes in, and understands, trusting and relying on those friends--Aisha stood by her even in the depths of her madness as Khepri, Lisa and Rachel worked to help her and understand her as best they could even when communication was impossible for her, Parian and Foil willing came under her control when she needed them. Taylor firmly believes in the value and power of friendship, to the point where how she treated and parted with her friends was a deep regret she had.

But that doesn't really change her perspective on Unity, because that was forged in the flames of the apocalypse, wherein even the impending annihilation of Mankind across all Earths couldn't make people get over themselves, work together, etc. A dozen different factions turned on each other in the midst of the end of the world, people kept secrets and lied to the very end, and perhaps most importantly--even those who did work together in the face of impossible odds couldn't actually do anything. Many Parahumans did work together against Scion, for example, and broadly speaking, they spent a week dying without accomplishing anything of note. Making progress required dominating and destroying everything in her way, and the fact that her friendships endured even when the world didn't and remained strong even when the world was ending is important, it's true, it's something she's held close to her heart for twelve long years--but it doesn't change that fact, either. And even then, well...when it came down to it, as Lisa complained, Taylor did things her way.

You could argue that her belief in such things, and her experience as a mother, is why she can connect with Xifeng and her Way as well as she does, but honestly, even that's kind of something else.

Simply put, Taylor believes that friendship is an amazing, priceless thing. She believes that extending a hand of friendship, in the right place and the right time, can save someone and change their life and that it's valuable beyond words, and that the bonds of that friendship can be unbreakable, that they can hold someone up even when all else seems lost, and survive when nothing else does. She believes in love and devotion and holding on.

What she doesn't believe is that people will put aside their differences and work together if the world started ending, or that it would necessarily matter even if they did.

Sort of like how Taylor loved her father and believed he loved her and believed in the value of that love--but didn't believe that going to her father would, say, resolve any of the problems that she was having with her bullies, which, to be fair, it didn't. She believes in love and while she doubted her feelings for Brian, she wished she could have loved him and that that love would have be enough--but deep down, she knew it wasn't. She believes in friendship and holds onto it forever, but couldn't rely on that in the end, either. Because deep down she knows--or, at least, 'knows'--that the way to effectuate change in the world is to dominate and destroy everything in her path, because that's the only thing that ever did.

TL;DR: Taylor was born to be a 90s Magical Girl, but was taught to be a 90s Supervillain.
 
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Unhappy lesbian couple hide to their adopted daughter that it has about two years left to live.

Best not make any assumptions; I give it even odds she ends up dating Dennis in the epilogue. Despite him being in another universe and also possibly dead, it would still have only 5% less buildup than it did in EoSS!

Yeah I'm never not going to be salty about that, sorry not sorry.

Also:
I don't spotlight every action Taylor does every day, and a lot of her routine is just glossed over. She's still training, she's still working out, she's still keeping in shape — but there are limits to how far even Taylor goes and how far she can go. The runes thing is brought up in a few chapters, where I reiterate that learning runes is a lot like learning a new language. Taylor has an advantage in that she has someone there who knows them well enough to teach her, but she's also at a massive disadvantage in that runic magecraft isn't a spoken language. She is not going to be making huge leaps and bounds in the span of about a month's time, and she can't speed up her learning by immersing herself in the language the way you can in real life. She's trying to learn hieroglyphics that can blow her to pieces if she does them wrong. Of course it's going slow.

Apropos of that, Taylor is not her memetic self. She does not spend every waking moment preparing, she doesn't fill her entire day with training and self-betterment. She didn't in canon either. She took breaks, she went out shopping with her friends, she read books in her off time. As part of the Wards, more of the latter than the former. She's a human, not a machine, and I don't recall if it's ever brought up in Worm, but I would think Brian, at least, would have told her how detrimental it can be to overtrain yourself.

But just because she takes an hour or two after breakfast to relax doesn't mean she isn't training at all.

Guys. The story starts in August, 2015. They're currently going into November. Of the three months it's been since the story began for them, about a third of it was spent in one Singularity or another. After Orleans, she spent most of the time until Septem training the twins. After Septem, a large portion of her focus was on Olga's recovery, so she didn't do as much training with the twins, and Waver and Aife took over their magecraft lessons and physical conditioning respectively. After Okeanos, they got a few days to relax and bring Emiya back, and then the Prison Tower happened, and now things are easing out of "we just had another minor crisis."

First of all, this "SI!Taylor" thing needs to die. Violently. In a fire. Screaming and yelling and gasping for air, because it was vaguely funny when it was made as a joke, but it's insulting when you use it seriously. Secondly, I don't know where in the world you're getting the idea that Ritsuka is now far stronger than Taylor "on every level." Because he went through a traumatic, transformative experience and came away surer of himself and somewhat more confident? Because he bonded with the Servant who was stuck with him throughout the whole thing? I don't have any idea where you're getting that from those.

Thirdly, it's addressed obliquely in this chapter, but there isn't much she can do to prepare for the London, primarily because she hasn't even been told yet that the next Singularity is in London, let alone the era it's going to be taking place in, and let's not even get started on the year. The only thing the team is aware of about the next Singularity so far is that it's taking place in southern England. That's it. Considering Britain has about 2000 years of history on the shortest end, what do you expect her to study? The history of a single period in those 2000 years is something that scholars can spend lifetimes learning and studying, and Taylor isn't stupid. She knows better than to assume she can cram 200 years of history into her head in any meaningful way in just a few weeks, let alone 10x that much. She's waiting on Da Vinci and the others to let her know what era she needs to be researching.

I'm fairly sure that much is mentioned, if not here, then at some point in the next few chapters. Solomon, however, is very specifically called out in this one, because Marisbury had to be a dick and hide all the juiciest stuff about his HGW murder buddy, and Taylor has already exhausted what little is left in Chaldea's records. As she mentions.

Fourthly and lastly, nothing super exciting happened this chapter because nothing super exciting was supposed to happen. Three cooldown chapters after the Prison Tower. The whole point is for everyone — readers and characters alike — to take one, gigantic breath and let it out real slow. Ease out of the tension. Because after they're done, we're winding up for London. This is 122 (CXXII). 128 (CXXVIII) is the official start of the next Singularity. Technically earlier, since one of those chapters between now and then is an interlude showing the beginning of the London Singularity.

We aren't seeing her training. That's what this issue boils down to, at least IMO. Taylor should be looking for advantages, trying to leverage what she has in the best possible way. She should be doing things where we can see them. I know at least one reader (me) who wants to know what her preparations look like. She was always working towards something, even if she still takes breaks! Even if it doesn't work out the attempt should be shown. She's learning runes, you say? Sweet! I want to see her learning runes. Even if it's slow! That's a major part of her character, it's one of the reasons the Escalation meme exists. Taylor takes what advantages she can scrape together and applies leverage wherever she can. With a big enough stick she can move the world, and I want to see her preparing that stick and looking for the best place to wedge it so she can start pushing! Her actions and interactions when they're in the field are largely her being reactive, and that's a good thing; but her actions while in Chaldea are her being proactive and that's just as important.

Now to be fair this whole mini-arc was dealing with a situation where Taylor couldn't really do anything. Seemed to be part of the point, leaving her in a situation where she's genuinely helpless to do anything she would consider useful. But just in general we don't see a lot of the preparation going on when they aren't fighting for their lives or about to be. Why not show more training sessions with the twins? The one where she showed them what it would be like to fight a Caster in her workshop is hands-down my favorite in this story. That shit was great! Maybe she could be discussing strategy or magic or runes or pretty much anything with Da Vinci? Hell a conversation about logistics and even resource management with Marie would be nice, and would also help set the shippers up for another stab in the kidneys when the epilogue comes around. EoSS took one of them out, might as well go for the twofer! Logistics and resources aren't anywhere near Taylor's responsibility, but despite character progression she' still a control freak. You can't tell me she wouldn't poke her nose in just to make herself feel more on top of things, or to feel like she's helping.

The slice of life is nice and all, but the world is kind of ending. Please show me what our protagonist is doing to try and prevent it when she isn't actively fighting for her life. Taylor was a candle burning itself at both ends in the lead up to Gold Morning, and that's what this entire story is. I don't expect her to sustain that kind of thing for the real and/or subjective MONTHS this whole crisis takes place during, but a little more hustle than what is shown would be lovely.
 
what would learning celtic martial arts help her do, directly throw ineffectual mortal hands against superhuman punchghosts?
I think a lot of people read canon as Ritsuka being effective combatant vs. Phantasmal Beasts and Servants.
Because Shadow Summons were added to narrative of the game in Lost Belts (and even then they only mentioned only handful of times), and Shimousa manga is it's own thing.
So you have Ritsuka and Mash defeating loads of enemies on their own, and either Mash absurdly OP, or Ritsuka meaningful front-line participant in high-level combat.

I think for this story, if Taylor given more uptime on her Shadow summons with ability to better direct them, it be seen as her more directly contributing.
 
Yeesh... tough crowd. Being honest, this kind of reaction is to be somewhat expected. As you said, this is the cooldown for the Tower arc, but given the main complaint of that arc was how much nothing was going on in it, the chapter kinda lands on a thud. Less cooling down from a brisk jog and more changing seats from one cold chair to another. Though I do have to thank you for adding the Ritsuka bits to the end of chapters on Fanfiction version. With those bits in, the pacing is a lot better and I honestly think the arc works better.

As for the whole "Taylor isn't contributing enough argument," my 2 cents is to blame Aife. No I'm serious.

Reading between the lines of the complaints is that there's a general feeling that Taylor has a lot of unaccounted for free time that is being spent doing nothing. That may not be what you intend, but Taylor contributions outside of fieldwork appears to be pretty lackluster. She's teach Mash to swim... and nothing. Just off screen research with no noticeable impact. But before Aife showed up, Taylor was serving as the Team's trainer. Coming up with the Caster exercise and being responsible for their physical and Magecraft training before Aife and Waver took over respectively.

I think that's the best thing you should focus on for the future. Taylor needs to be dragged, kicking and screaming if you have to, into the mentor role again during downtime. Of course Aife and Waver are better teachers for fighting and magecraft respectively, but Taylor beats them both in grand tactics due to her experience. Both with her cape power and also as a warlord. So have her do that. Teach the rookies the tactics fit for a commander since that is the role a Master has to be.

In short. A Grail Front.

Also... Gudaguda. No that isn't relevant to the discussion, but I will never give in. Never surrender. NOBU!
 
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