all fictions
I hate you! (it's not against the rules!)
- Location
- Mons Regius
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Counter Force?
Fate/Sunny Order (FGO)
- Thread starter Swordomatic
- Start date
Deadly Snark
Tryhard As Fuck
I think their other Grandfather is telling Ritsuka to just start shooting Servants with the black keys.
I have to say that this is the first time, in any 'fic, that I've seen Gilgamesh take someone to Suplex City.
Ouch.
Of course! Because Gilgamesh is fucking crazy.
Seihai-kun
[Unverified Wish Granting Device]
- Location
- Brasil
Why do I have a feeling that Gilgamesh is going to stay naked for the entire fic from now on?
- Pronouns
- He/Him
I like Kana's personality.
Mirvein
A Tea-Fueled Monstrosity.
- Location
- In the middle of nowhere.
Does anybody mind?
gilded king
Very Lost king
- Location
- throne of heroes
Elizabeth ? Carmilla? The children ?
Mirvein
A Tea-Fueled Monstrosity.
- Location
- In the middle of nowhere.
Is she even in Chaldea now?
She still needs some targets to practice her iron maiden on, you know... and the same question stands for her, also.
Rhyme, Jackie-chan (sweet puns), (lol) Hans?
TECHNICALLY, lots of Chaldea people would mind. But~
I was talking about readers!
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Kyte
Never quacked for this
Someone will tell him to please put some pants on and that's how he'll reach 3rd ascension.
Most of us just loves either Stronk Servants or our Waifus. But then again, I don't play the game, so feel free to correct me.
Wait. Not even Kojiro? I mean, post Orleans? Lots of fire-breathing swallows?
Not always. Robin Hood is a one-man showmanship that tends to get rekt when involving others (and only good at guerilla fighting management), and Raikou... is Raikou.
Oh yeah. That's why we need
...White jacket with black is cooler. I mean, look!
It's even attached to a Rider!
Oh dear, SSR? Kana really had the Devil's Luck, isn't she?
...Ooooor maaaybe not.
...Meeep.
...Oh yeah, he's bipolar like that.
Double meeep.
Like this?
At least until you got some smol Servants. Then you got some angry lioness everytime he did that.
"Berserker, Mad Enhancement, Cancelled! By these Command Seals, I Command Thee to Stop!!"
"What is wrong with Herc?! He usually-"
"His Master was killed by Gilgamesh during 5th War. Blinded then stabbed through heart."
"His Master?"
"Einzbern Representative. Homunculus. Illya-chan."
"Illya- Wait, you mean-"
"My... older sister. Looking very young."
"He killed a little girl?!"
"That was a war, you Mongrels-"
"Gilgamesh of Uruk, by This Command Seal, I Command Thee To Stand and Doing Nothing. Heracles, Son of Zeus, by This Command Seal, I Command Thee To Not Kill Him."
Heracles doesn't look very happy.
"Everything else is fair game though."
Heracles looks much happier afterwards. Not so much with Gil.
You forgot the space between sentences.
has
Falzyker
2020! What will you try now?
- Location
- Somewhere with Bad Internet.
I bet she is the little pervert, can't ignore beefcake in front of her.
Rejoice! You now have something that only those in the Moon-Cell have, Gil's respect.
Z000
If this is trash, then find me in the dumpster
- Location
- Viet Nam
not exactly a good thing
Being compare to the Hakuno, those 2 are a bit weird in the head
And Gil respect doesnt mean much, it just mean he doesnt think of you as non recycleable trash
- Location
- USA
...wow, I didn't think it possible.
With this chapter, you have officially kicked things up, outdoing the previous craziness you brought to the table. I am in awe. All bow to Swordo. All Hail Kana for sheer ballsiness. Lets see if she can give the middle finger to Solomon and live. Poor, poor, Ritsuka, our lovely universal chew toy.
With this chapter, you have officially kicked things up, outdoing the previous craziness you brought to the table. I am in awe. All bow to Swordo. All Hail Kana for sheer ballsiness. Lets see if she can give the middle finger to Solomon and live. Poor, poor, Ritsuka, our lovely universal chew toy.
the hell
That's it. That's the end of it. I'm sorry, everyone. But, for the good of humanity, humanity must die. The extermination begins immediately, please form an orderly line to my left and wait your turn.
Is this where I start making the "Kana wants a harem" jokes? It is, right?
Also, did you all see how I didn't make ANY puerile jokes about Kana "loving" her Servants? Did you see? DID YOU?! That means I'm a good person, DESPITE what that judge said. *sips scotch serenely*
"...but what if our enemies are female?"
"WE WILL GROW THEM A DICK TO PUNCH."
"Yeah, okay. I've seen those videos, too."
"Exa- wait, who the hell's been showing you those videos?!"
Today, children, we'll be explaining the uses of a "crowbar" and it's relevance to the phrase "anything that's not nailed down"....
*opens mouth*
*pauses*
*closes mouth*
No. No, that's a terrible joke, and I'm not going to make it. (But I'm willing to lay money the first thing they grow are bananas... just so they can trick Mashu into eating them in front of Ritsuka. Because if you can't laugh at Ritsuka's love life haven't the terrorists already won?)
One day, Ritsuka will draw something spectacularly amazing and useful... and he will spend the rest of the story anxiously awaiting the other shoe to fall. From orbit. JUPITER'S orbit.
*eyes those last two*
*eyes Discworld drinking songs*
...naw. They're probably not wizard's staffs.
*choke* Is THAT what they're call- no! No! You're better than this! (Okay, you're NOT, but let's pretend for just a few seconds! You know, for novelty's sake. Lure 'em into complacency and then... BAM! giggles.)
I thought you said you weren't into that last chapter? I KNEW you were lying! I'm getting The Chart!
What's the matter, Ritsuka? Is there something wrong with your sister, your twin sister, telling you all about how she's going for the money shot? Does it make you feel... uncomfortable in some way? Does it affect your feelings in any way to know that there's almost certainly a few people in Chaldea who're convinced, CONVINCED, that the reason Kana kept all those suitors away from you is because of her... special feelings for you? Are you aware the betting pool currently has 3:2 odds on "Brocon"? ...are you aware someone's face shouldn't be THAT shade of purple? I'll... just be going, then? ...yeah, I'll just be going. Before the paralyzing, incandescent rage wears off.
And this is the moment Ritsuka starts to feel... concern.
Well. There's SOME reaction. Which Ritsuka will deny to his dying day. (Look, Gilgamesh is a VERY PRETTY MAN, okay?)
...not a big fan of foreplay, is he.
....
Whulp, that's it. I'm in love with Kana and want to have her babies.
<obvious joke RE: "fucking idiot">
"Your armor is not cute."
"We will make it cute."
You know what? That's close enough to manly hug of manliness that I'm getting The Chart!
...the Fanta girls?
...you felt a disturbance in Gilgamesh? How? I mean, you'd have to be... like... INSIDE him to... oh. Oh, you stay right there, I'm GETTING THE CHART.
Ritsuka, who's busily doing math in his head and thinking of baseball and his grandmother naked in the snow and NOT how pretty Gilgamesh is and how his perfect lips are RIGHT THERE.
Don't you look at me like that. It's okay if it's Gilgamesh. He's the free square on the "Yeah, I'd do that." Bingo card.
Hmmm... let's see. Ritsuka previously was exactly one bomb-wielding Nobunaga from having no fucks to give. Now, if you adjust that amount with the number of fucks destroyed via Gil and his suplex, you get... carry the one... carry the OTHER one... add the exponent....
Wow. That's a hell of a negative number. Um. Right! Quickly, someone fetch Mashu! Ritsuka needs to have his fucks refilled! ...better get d'Eon, too. Just in case.
*snicker*
What I love here is the fact that THEY'RE STILL IN THE SUPLEX.
So... he launched Gil via... hip thrust, then? (And, hidden in the shadows, Le Chevalier d'Eon makes a note... and underlines it. Twice. And circles it with a little heart.)
....
*wild, helpless laughter* Well DONE, Ritsuka! Hit Gil where it MATTERS: His pride!
...and d'Eon adds a separate, DIFFERENT note.
"And THAT, girls, is why every night we say a prayer of thankfulness to Saint Ritsuka, for his glorious role in helping Gilgamesh become a nudist. Do I hear an 'Amen?'"
"AMEN."
What the hell, Kana. Did you eat a whole bowl of salt or something? 'cause you THIRSTY.
Since you could bounce yogurt off those abs?
Also, I'm not really a "Fate guy," but... look I've heard... Things. Bad Things. I'll accept Gilgamesh deciding nudism is his bag if it means some of those Things do not happen.
*puerile giggle* I'm not proud of that one.
*puerile giggle 2: the regiggling* And it's ON THE CHART!
"And why does that DO IT for me so well?"
"OH MY GOD KANA NO"
I assumed Le Chevalier d'Eon. They'd be all... French at Gil. ...that's a super power, right?
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Seihai-kun
[Unverified Wish Granting Device]
- Location
- Brasil
Only a bit. Because the Hakunos themselves were also weird in the head.
Kyte
Never quacked for this
TikiTau
Commander Pangolinski
- Location
- Texas
*ponders evidence*
-sweet bike
-voice activated armor
-endless array of gadgets
-ego
-claims to be the King of Heroes
-stylish when incognito
-loud, flashy, likes standing dramatically on high places
...the whole reason Gil is such a prick normally is because he is salty no one ever summons him as his heart's true desire and allows him to be a (Kamen) Rider, isn't it?
-sweet bike
-voice activated armor
-endless array of gadgets
-ego
-claims to be the King of Heroes
-stylish when incognito
-loud, flashy, likes standing dramatically on high places
...the whole reason Gil is such a prick normally is because he is salty no one ever summons him as his heart's true desire and allows him to be a (Kamen) Rider, isn't it?
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Icipall
Don't worry, we can fanfix that!
- Location
- Cold snow fields of Finland
Aka, a normal day of Gacha.
The mental image of that is amazing. :lol
That thread is getting thinner and thinner...
Holy fuck!
First, I did not expect AUO: CAST OFF to make an appearance in this fic. Second, can't really fault Kana.
Nottheunmaker
Altman be praised
- Location
- USG Ishimura
I too needed a few days to wrap my head around that nonsense. It didn't help when I learned what's actually going on with her origin .
Just Bananas? *Points to the Peaches*
*Blinks* ... What's Enkidu on that card then?
... Brr. I just imagined Kana and Rits having kids in the future. I'm not sure if it's the incest or the kids that made me shiver on that front though.
... You know, I kind of want to see Archer's reaction to the CEs.
"Why are you summoning my old clothes? ... How are you summoning my old clothes?"
"Apparently the Throne is the sort of creepy stalker that keeps a shrine full of senpai's dirty laundry."
"Why are you summoning my old clothes? ... How are you summoning my old clothes?"
"Apparently the Throne is the sort of creepy stalker that keeps a shrine full of senpai's dirty laundry."
all fictions
I hate you! (it's not against the rules!)
- Location
- Mons Regius
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Well them and Enkidu, Iskandar, Waver, and Kirei somewhat.
Huh, that's a lot more people than I expected.
- Location
- nuevomexicoItesigto
Well, if we continue with the theory of Emiya harem of alaya, it is possible
By the way I want to see Saber react to see Gil?....
- Location
- United States
It is total has. I still managed to summon 2 Jack's, 2 Drakes and a Mysterious Heroine after summoning the King of Heroes.