Fate/Sunny Order (FGO)
- Thread starter Swordomatic
- Start date
Whelp time to put the plot bunny I have for this scenario out to rest.
[] for internal thoughts
Mashu: Shes been like this awhile senpai.
Guda: Already working on it.
Scene: EMIYA walks in with Nursery Rhyme carrying a cake. Only to have Jack throw the cake on to the ground before running off leaving Nursery Rhyme near the point of tears.
Mashu: Eh! Not even sweets or Nursery Rhyme could cheer her up. Senpai we must do something at once lest we have a rouge Jack the ripper running through the halls of Chaldea!
Guda: Indeed we cant let her run around with knives she might poke her eyes out.
Mashu: That's not what I meant senpai.
Transition
Guda: Whats the matter Jack?
Jack: Nothing is wrong Mommy.
Jack looks away
Guda: Oh? Then why did you throw mister EMIYA cake on the ground and run away from Nursery Rhyme?
Jack: …
Guda: You know Nursery Rhyme looked like she was going to cry.
Jack: !!!
Jack: We sorry mommy! We didn't mean to mommy! We ...
Guda interrupts with head pat.
Guda: Its fine Nursery Rhyme will forgive you if you apologies to her, and EMIYA is too fond of children to be mad at you. Though he is going to make you eat vegetables as punishment latter.
Jack Sticks her tongue out.
Guda: Although can you tell me why you were so sad earlier I promise to help with it if I can.
Jack: You do?
Guda responds with a nod accompanied by a smile.
Jack: We so happy mommy! Mommy will help us be like the other Heroic Spirits! Mommy will help us get pants!
Guda: [Well at lest this will be simple might not even need to go get Mashu to help out with this. All I need to do is look for any extra uniforms that are in storage and trim it down to size. EMIYA should help with that.]
Jack: Come! This way Mommy! We know where pants are!
Jack pulls Guadao towards the Rayshift room
Guda:[Maybe recruiting Mashu for this would be for the best.]
Transition
Mashu: Rayshift successful Senpai. Its seems Jack's tracked her target to this temple. Wait I am sensing a Servent aproaching.
Medea appears
Medea: Oh? What do we have here a cute little assassin oh how would I love to dress you up.
Jack: Do you have pants?
Medea: Pants? Why would I dress you in such bland things. No I will put you in cute dresses!
Jack: We want pants!
Medea: humph. What a miss behaving child I supposed you will have to be disciplined.
Mashu: It seems like we have been dragged into a fight senpai.
After Medea has been defeated.
Medea: You think you have one, but I have claimed victory here to day for there are none of the pants you desire here. Your Victory is meaningless.
Medea fades.
Mashu: Truly Medea is a witch to spite Jack like that.
Jack: Oh. We didn't get any pants. Its fine mommy we know somewhere else to get pants!
Mashu: I get the feeling that somewhere is more accurately someone.
Transition
Mashu: France? Well we maybe able to buy Jack some pants from a tailor. We may not have to fight some one this time.
Jeanne: Bonjour travelers! May I impose what you journey for?
Guda: Spoke too soon it seems Mashu.
Mashu: Come now Senpai its miss Jeanne. It should be fine.
Guda: You jinxed us Mashu.
Jack: We are looking for pants!
Jeanne: Pants?
Roman: Sorry it took so long to check up on you two but paper work double since last I saw, but its not important how is mission Pants for Jack going.
Mashu: first location was a bust but Jeanne should be kind enough help us.
Jack: Yes we want pants!
Jeanne: pants.
Roman: Um … that may not be for the best.
Mashu: What? Jeanne is the kind hearted girl that would be happy to help a little girl like Jack obtaine some pants.
Jack starts dancing.
Jack
ants! Pants! Pants! Pants!
Jeanne(Alter):ARE YOU MOCKING ME YOU LITTLE PEST.
Mashu: What! She just turned into an alter!
Roman:Oh no this is what I was worried about!
Mashu: How is this a potential you were worried about.
Roman: Because when Jeanne was burned at the stake the conviction came from cross dressing!
Guda: So pants trigger her now.
Jack stop dancing
Jack: Your not going to give us pants?
Jeanne(Alter): ALL YOUR GETTING IS EXERCSISED!
Roman:Looks like you two have fight or Jacks dead.
Mashu: Ready for orders senpai!
One battle latter
Jeanne: My head. Did I get hit with a mace again. Oh! Are you all right friends?
Mashu:Eh! Yes! We are perfectly fine sorry but we must be on our way.
Jeanne: Oh! Then safe journey friends.
Transition
Mashu: Oh dear Jack has fallen in to a rut again.
Guda: Don't worry Jack we will get you some pants I promise .
Jack smiles
Jack: Thank you Mommy, but I don't know where else to look.
Guda: Don't worry I have an Idea.
Transition
Mashu: Are you certain about this Snepai, but its too late now.
Pirates: Captain it seems we have some drifters.
Teach: Oh ho!~ If it isn't cute little Mashmellow …
Mashu: Don't call me that.
Teach: and the adorable loli assassin!~ Men get a feast ready lets celibate or honored guests. Please tell old Teach what you want for he will give it too you.~
Jack: Give me you pants.
Teach: …
Pirates: …
Mashu: …
Guda : …
Pirates: Ca-Captian?
Teach: Men I am a pirate. The scourge of the sea. My place in he was reserved the day I was born. I kill, steal, pluck the flowers of young maidens, and indulge myself in debauchery.
Pirates: Captain?!?!
Teach: Blackbeard is many things, BUT HE IS NOT A PEDOPHILE! TO ARMS MEN! DEFEND ME FROM THE MURDER LOLI! TO BATTLE!
Guda: Mashu...
Mashu: Ready for battle senpai.
One Ship sunk later
Jack: DUN!~ DUN!~ DU DUUUU!~
Jack has obtained a dirty pants
Guda: You know that you have to wash a new pair of pants when you just get them right.
Jack: but we don't know how to wash clothes.
Guda: Don't worry EMIYA will do it for you when we back to Chaldea.
Jack: YAY! We can't wait to show Nursery Rhyme are new pants!
Mashu: I guess this means Mission complete Senpai.
Fate/Grand Pants
Scene: All is quite in Chaldea but little Jack is mopping.Mashu: Shes been like this awhile senpai.
Guda: Already working on it.
Scene: EMIYA walks in with Nursery Rhyme carrying a cake. Only to have Jack throw the cake on to the ground before running off leaving Nursery Rhyme near the point of tears.
Mashu: Eh! Not even sweets or Nursery Rhyme could cheer her up. Senpai we must do something at once lest we have a rouge Jack the ripper running through the halls of Chaldea!
Guda: Indeed we cant let her run around with knives she might poke her eyes out.
Mashu: That's not what I meant senpai.
Transition
Guda: Whats the matter Jack?
Jack: Nothing is wrong Mommy.
Jack looks away
Guda: Oh? Then why did you throw mister EMIYA cake on the ground and run away from Nursery Rhyme?
Jack: …
Guda: You know Nursery Rhyme looked like she was going to cry.
Jack: !!!
Jack: We sorry mommy! We didn't mean to mommy! We ...
Guda interrupts with head pat.
Guda: Its fine Nursery Rhyme will forgive you if you apologies to her, and EMIYA is too fond of children to be mad at you. Though he is going to make you eat vegetables as punishment latter.
Jack Sticks her tongue out.
Guda: Although can you tell me why you were so sad earlier I promise to help with it if I can.
Jack: You do?
Guda responds with a nod accompanied by a smile.
Jack: We so happy mommy! Mommy will help us be like the other Heroic Spirits! Mommy will help us get pants!
Guda: [Well at lest this will be simple might not even need to go get Mashu to help out with this. All I need to do is look for any extra uniforms that are in storage and trim it down to size. EMIYA should help with that.]
Jack: Come! This way Mommy! We know where pants are!
Jack pulls Guadao towards the Rayshift room
Guda:[Maybe recruiting Mashu for this would be for the best.]
Transition
Mashu: Rayshift successful Senpai. Its seems Jack's tracked her target to this temple. Wait I am sensing a Servent aproaching.
Medea appears
Medea: Oh? What do we have here a cute little assassin oh how would I love to dress you up.
Jack: Do you have pants?
Medea: Pants? Why would I dress you in such bland things. No I will put you in cute dresses!
Jack: We want pants!
Medea: humph. What a miss behaving child I supposed you will have to be disciplined.
Mashu: It seems like we have been dragged into a fight senpai.
After Medea has been defeated.
Medea: You think you have one, but I have claimed victory here to day for there are none of the pants you desire here. Your Victory is meaningless.
Medea fades.
Mashu: Truly Medea is a witch to spite Jack like that.
Jack: Oh. We didn't get any pants. Its fine mommy we know somewhere else to get pants!
Mashu: I get the feeling that somewhere is more accurately someone.
Transition
Mashu: France? Well we maybe able to buy Jack some pants from a tailor. We may not have to fight some one this time.
Jeanne: Bonjour travelers! May I impose what you journey for?
Guda: Spoke too soon it seems Mashu.
Mashu: Come now Senpai its miss Jeanne. It should be fine.
Guda: You jinxed us Mashu.
Jack: We are looking for pants!
Jeanne: Pants?
Roman: Sorry it took so long to check up on you two but paper work double since last I saw, but its not important how is mission Pants for Jack going.
Mashu: first location was a bust but Jeanne should be kind enough help us.
Jack: Yes we want pants!
Jeanne: pants.
Roman: Um … that may not be for the best.
Mashu: What? Jeanne is the kind hearted girl that would be happy to help a little girl like Jack obtaine some pants.
Jack starts dancing.
Jack
ants! Pants! Pants! Pants!Jeanne(Alter):ARE YOU MOCKING ME YOU LITTLE PEST.
Mashu: What! She just turned into an alter!
Roman:Oh no this is what I was worried about!
Mashu: How is this a potential you were worried about.
Roman: Because when Jeanne was burned at the stake the conviction came from cross dressing!
Guda: So pants trigger her now.
Jack stop dancing
Jack: Your not going to give us pants?
Jeanne(Alter): ALL YOUR GETTING IS EXERCSISED!
Roman:Looks like you two have fight or Jacks dead.
Mashu: Ready for orders senpai!
One battle latter
Jeanne: My head. Did I get hit with a mace again. Oh! Are you all right friends?
Mashu:Eh! Yes! We are perfectly fine sorry but we must be on our way.
Jeanne: Oh! Then safe journey friends.
Transition
Mashu: Oh dear Jack has fallen in to a rut again.
Guda: Don't worry Jack we will get you some pants I promise .
Jack smiles
Jack: Thank you Mommy, but I don't know where else to look.
Guda: Don't worry I have an Idea.
Transition
Mashu: Are you certain about this Snepai, but its too late now.
Pirates: Captain it seems we have some drifters.
Teach: Oh ho!~ If it isn't cute little Mashmellow …
Mashu: Don't call me that.
Teach: and the adorable loli assassin!~ Men get a feast ready lets celibate or honored guests. Please tell old Teach what you want for he will give it too you.~
Jack: Give me you pants.
Teach: …
Pirates: …
Mashu: …
Guda : …
Pirates: Ca-Captian?
Teach: Men I am a pirate. The scourge of the sea. My place in he was reserved the day I was born. I kill, steal, pluck the flowers of young maidens, and indulge myself in debauchery.
Pirates: Captain?!?!
Teach: Blackbeard is many things, BUT HE IS NOT A PEDOPHILE! TO ARMS MEN! DEFEND ME FROM THE MURDER LOLI! TO BATTLE!
Guda: Mashu...
Mashu: Ready for battle senpai.
One Ship sunk later
Jack: DUN!~ DUN!~ DU DUUUU!~
Jack has obtained a dirty pants
Guda: You know that you have to wash a new pair of pants when you just get them right.
Jack: but we don't know how to wash clothes.
Guda: Don't worry EMIYA will do it for you when we back to Chaldea.
Jack: YAY! We can't wait to show Nursery Rhyme are new pants!
Mashu: I guess this means Mission complete Senpai.
Asterion
People think I'm Crazy 'cause I make no Sense
- Location
- The Island of Endless Stories
Why hasn't anyone made a Fic of that yet? Just seeing all the Spirits interact in a giant Apartment!Throne of Heroes?
Spectral Waltz
Scatterbrained Writer
- Location
- Walking the Endless Corridors
Because Slice of Life without a plot can get boring after a while?
I mean... Not to say it wouldn't be worth writing, just that it would take a little more than just that initial concept to be any good.
- Location
- Singapore
Because it would rapidly become Fate/NEET Order.
Academic Guardian
Just an old man with a hobby
- Location
- Somewhere in the twisting Kaleidoscope
Ah a thought just occurred to me!
There is one Servant that help Kana with her body image issues, but she is still pretty far off.
Mama Raikou
There is one Servant that help Kana with her body image issues, but she is still pretty far off.
Mama Raikou
Heh. I've always sorta thought that the reason that the various Servants never say anything about the Throne is that it's either super awesome and words can't describe it, or it's really embarrassing.
Z000
If this is trash, then find me in the dumpster
- Location
- Viet Nam
She not the best for the job
being non-human, she have a very non-humanoid body
thin, tall and with a breast that can serve as weapon isn't exactly something that gonna help
edit: i mean look at this
Last edited:
Chapter Eight - Pt. 2
- Location
- Singapore
The information acquired paints an interesting hodgepodge of a map, d'Eon notes in their quarters.What they learn has only made Ritsuka even more of an enigma than he already is. Archer seems to recognise his charisma as an inborn characteristic, but it is something he himself is largely ignorant of despite having acted to counter it in his own sister.
Taken in a vacuum, it more closely resembles a bunch of idiots drifting from event to event. But there has to be more to it. This quality cannot be incidental. Pure chance cannot have produced the ideal Masters for Chaldea. Is it related to how they refer to the King of Knights as 'auntie'? Have they grown up around legendary figures all their lives?
d'Eon has learned nothing. The mystery only deepens. Closer observation is necessary. First-hand observation.
There is a knock on the door. d'Eon opens it, and finds Mashu Kyrielight, Demi-Servant Shielder, standing there with a frown in her eyes. "Uhm... Saber d'Eon, can we talk?"
d'Eon nods and stands aside. "Of course," they say, and gesture for Mashu to step in. The purple-haired girl walks in as the door shuts behind her, and she sits after d'Eon gestures for her to do so. The silence is slightly awkward and offputting. Someone will have to break the ice. d'Eon watches on calmly, wondering if she has the will to make her own decision.
"Le Chevalier d'Eon," Mashu says, her voice clear and firm, "I would ask that you not ask Ritsuka-senpai out."
It is that matter after all. What else could it possibly be? "Why would I?" The former spymaster asks. "Ritsuka Tohsaka is currently single. Anyone could ask, and it wouldn't even be wrong. What matters is his decision, isn't it?"
Mashu is defiant. "It is an open secret that we like each other, so I would greatly appreciate if you would acknowledge our feelings, and not intervene." She looks down, looking sad, but Shielder hardens her heart. "I l-like Ritsuka-senpai, a-and he's mine. H-He should be mine!
M-M-My..." She swallows. "...B-Boyfriend."
"Is it?" d'Eon asks. They step closer to Mashu, looming over her. "As I understand, you rejected him when he tried confessing to you."
Her face flushes red, and Mashu dares not make eye contact. "Ye-Yes, but I was... I was flustered! I didn't expect it to happen so suddenly! A-And it doesn't change my feelings or his feelings!"
"Ah," d'Eon sighs, "But by rejecting him... didn't you forfeit your chance?"
"T-That's...!"
She falls on the bed, flat on her back. d'Eon follows her, holding themselves over Mashu with her hands on the bed. Mashu looks up at d'Eon's face so close to hers, her face red, her breath quick.
"That's fine," d'Eon purrs. "I don't mind sharing."
"W-Wuh?" Mashu babbles. Her coherence has taken leave, only raw, confused emotion remains. "H-Huh?!!"
"You also interest me, Mashu Kyrielight," d'Eon says to her, smiling. "And, as I understand it, neither of you know what love is like. I do. And I am willing to teach."
"T-That's, I-I-I MEAN--"
d'Eon chuckles, low and lusty. They lean in close, and whisper in her ear. "Would you like to know why no one loves like the French?"
"---!!!"
It is too much for her. Mashu goes limp, her eyes rolled up into her skull, her body twitching uncontrollably, a streak of red dripping from her nose. d'Eon smirks as they extricate themselves and leave the room. It seems that she is still too innocent for their Master. But that isn't bad, either. It is an appealing look, one d'Eon has used before – and if it is genuine, all the better.
d'Eon chuckles as they close the door behind them. Time to hunt.
--
"So, uh."
Getting cornered by an androgynous french spy in the hallway right outside your room is a very good way to practice your mental acuity, Ritsuka realises. It has to be the only reason why a bunch of information is suddenly highly relevant. Like why Archer told him about french girls. Or Reinforcement. Or why d'Eon was there at the cafeteria when he was talking to Kana. Now it all makes sense.
In the end, this is the future he has to face. No way to go but forward.
"...Can I help you?" Ritsuka asks.
"You are an interesting person, Master," Le Chevalier d'Eon says outright, their voice a low, sultry purr. "I wish to get to know you more... intimately."
Right. This bullshit. If only he did get hit on in high school, it might have prepared him for this. Still, Archer might be wrong. Ritsuka takes a deep breath. "Listen, d'Eon... I appreciate the thought, but I'm busy as heck right now. As it turns out, saving the world is a full time committment, and I don't think I have the energy left to devote myself to a special pers—woah!"
He stumbles back, his heart in his throat, as the wall behind him caves in, and Ritsuka finds himself on the ground, with the french Saber practically straddling him. He feels their breath on his cheek, and decides that things have gotten extremely awkward.
Wait that's right Le Chevalier d'Eon has Strength A.
When the fuck did that happen.
"You're stalling, Ritsuka Tohsaka," d'Eon says, somewhere between anger and acceptance. "Get. To. The. Point."
"I-I-I'm saying I'm b-busy saving the world, m-managing Servants, d-d-dealing with my sister, f-fighting, an-and everything else!" He says quickly, practically blabbering. "I-I mean sure, awesome! Y-You're nice! You are v-very pretty! A-And French! A-And I appreciate that you've c-come to support us to s-save humanity! An-And--"
"But," d'Eon breathes. "You're not ready."
And just like that, the spy is off him. Ritsuka scrambles to an upright position as d'Eon stands up and faces away.
"You're not ready for a relationship," They say again. d'Eon pauses, finding the words. "Yet. And that's okay. I can wait."
They look over their shoulder at Ritsuka, hands clasped behind their back. "I look forward to the day we rendezvous, Master. And don't worry about Shielder; she seems enthusiastic about our Ménage à trois."
They head off before Ritsuka can say anything else, leaving him alone in the silence again. He thinks he saw the ghost of a smile, or the slightest flush on their cheeks, maybe even a skip in d'Eon's step as they left. It makes no sense to him. It must have been his eyes tricking him.
This happens distressingly often with him. He stands up, leaning against an upright section of his room's wall, trying to get a grip on himself.
"...Wait, d'Eon said threesome in french," he mutters, eyes widening slowly in realisation and shock. He looks up at the ceiling and frowns. "Huh..."
He sits there, not even caring that there is a giant hole in his wall at this hour of the day.
"...Dad, it's me. An androgynous french spy with the power to change their gender on demand has offered to partake in a threeway with me and my crush. Are you proud of me?"
There is no answer. Of course there wouldn't be, his father is dead with the incineration of humanity, and will be until he saves the timeline. But somehow, Ritsuka can feel his father's resigned, supportive nod.
Late at night, in the kitchen, Arturia Pendragon sits at the counter eating a parfait, surrounded by a pile of dessert cups. Archer stands beside her, cleaning a plate to radiant perfection with a dishrag.
"...Archer, I get the feeling you gave Ritsuka the talk." The King of Knights looks over at him, an alternate version of the man she loves. "Tell me, did you know Ritsuka has never received the confessions of another girl?"
She sticks her leg out, just in time to catch the plate just right to keep it from shattering. You know, because Archer drops it.
"...Excuse me?" He asks, an eyebrow raised. "From what Kana tells me, he was the Tohsaka of his generation, a beloved and respected honor student with many admirers. How did he of all people never receive a love confession?"
"Kana," Arturia replies simply, and all becomes clear. She takes another bite of parfait and delights in the almonds mingling in the ice cream. "Incidentally, Kana is much the same. Ritsuka fought off all of her admirers."
"...I told him about Reinforcement with the assumption that he was ready for it," Archer says with growing horror. "I have failed on every level."
"Ritsuka already knows about Reinforcement," Arturia says casually. Archer ignores her; best she not know, even if she knows exactly the kind of 'Reinforcement' he means.
"...In retrospect, I should have just told him to look out for Le Chevalier d'Eon," EMIYA sighs.
"Mm. Probably." Arturia plants her spoon into the cup with a clatter and pushes it towards the Red Man. "Another, please."
Taken in a vacuum, it more closely resembles a bunch of idiots drifting from event to event. But there has to be more to it. This quality cannot be incidental. Pure chance cannot have produced the ideal Masters for Chaldea. Is it related to how they refer to the King of Knights as 'auntie'? Have they grown up around legendary figures all their lives?
d'Eon has learned nothing. The mystery only deepens. Closer observation is necessary. First-hand observation.
There is a knock on the door. d'Eon opens it, and finds Mashu Kyrielight, Demi-Servant Shielder, standing there with a frown in her eyes. "Uhm... Saber d'Eon, can we talk?"
d'Eon nods and stands aside. "Of course," they say, and gesture for Mashu to step in. The purple-haired girl walks in as the door shuts behind her, and she sits after d'Eon gestures for her to do so. The silence is slightly awkward and offputting. Someone will have to break the ice. d'Eon watches on calmly, wondering if she has the will to make her own decision.
"Le Chevalier d'Eon," Mashu says, her voice clear and firm, "I would ask that you not ask Ritsuka-senpai out."
It is that matter after all. What else could it possibly be? "Why would I?" The former spymaster asks. "Ritsuka Tohsaka is currently single. Anyone could ask, and it wouldn't even be wrong. What matters is his decision, isn't it?"
Mashu is defiant. "It is an open secret that we like each other, so I would greatly appreciate if you would acknowledge our feelings, and not intervene." She looks down, looking sad, but Shielder hardens her heart. "I l-like Ritsuka-senpai, a-and he's mine. H-He should be mine!
M-M-My..." She swallows. "...B-Boyfriend."
"Is it?" d'Eon asks. They step closer to Mashu, looming over her. "As I understand, you rejected him when he tried confessing to you."
Her face flushes red, and Mashu dares not make eye contact. "Ye-Yes, but I was... I was flustered! I didn't expect it to happen so suddenly! A-And it doesn't change my feelings or his feelings!"
"Ah," d'Eon sighs, "But by rejecting him... didn't you forfeit your chance?"
"T-That's...!"
She falls on the bed, flat on her back. d'Eon follows her, holding themselves over Mashu with her hands on the bed. Mashu looks up at d'Eon's face so close to hers, her face red, her breath quick.
"That's fine," d'Eon purrs. "I don't mind sharing."
"W-Wuh?" Mashu babbles. Her coherence has taken leave, only raw, confused emotion remains. "H-Huh?!!"
"You also interest me, Mashu Kyrielight," d'Eon says to her, smiling. "And, as I understand it, neither of you know what love is like. I do. And I am willing to teach."
"T-That's, I-I-I MEAN--"
d'Eon chuckles, low and lusty. They lean in close, and whisper in her ear. "Would you like to know why no one loves like the French?"
"---!!!"
It is too much for her. Mashu goes limp, her eyes rolled up into her skull, her body twitching uncontrollably, a streak of red dripping from her nose. d'Eon smirks as they extricate themselves and leave the room. It seems that she is still too innocent for their Master. But that isn't bad, either. It is an appealing look, one d'Eon has used before – and if it is genuine, all the better.
d'Eon chuckles as they close the door behind them. Time to hunt.
--
"So, uh."
Getting cornered by an androgynous french spy in the hallway right outside your room is a very good way to practice your mental acuity, Ritsuka realises. It has to be the only reason why a bunch of information is suddenly highly relevant. Like why Archer told him about french girls. Or Reinforcement. Or why d'Eon was there at the cafeteria when he was talking to Kana. Now it all makes sense.
In the end, this is the future he has to face. No way to go but forward.
"...Can I help you?" Ritsuka asks.
"You are an interesting person, Master," Le Chevalier d'Eon says outright, their voice a low, sultry purr. "I wish to get to know you more... intimately."
Right. This bullshit. If only he did get hit on in high school, it might have prepared him for this. Still, Archer might be wrong. Ritsuka takes a deep breath. "Listen, d'Eon... I appreciate the thought, but I'm busy as heck right now. As it turns out, saving the world is a full time committment, and I don't think I have the energy left to devote myself to a special pers—woah!"
He stumbles back, his heart in his throat, as the wall behind him caves in, and Ritsuka finds himself on the ground, with the french Saber practically straddling him. He feels their breath on his cheek, and decides that things have gotten extremely awkward.
Wait that's right Le Chevalier d'Eon has Strength A.
When the fuck did that happen.
"You're stalling, Ritsuka Tohsaka," d'Eon says, somewhere between anger and acceptance. "Get. To. The. Point."
"I-I-I'm saying I'm b-busy saving the world, m-managing Servants, d-d-dealing with my sister, f-fighting, an-and everything else!" He says quickly, practically blabbering. "I-I mean sure, awesome! Y-You're nice! You are v-very pretty! A-And French! A-And I appreciate that you've c-come to support us to s-save humanity! An-And--"
"But," d'Eon breathes. "You're not ready."
And just like that, the spy is off him. Ritsuka scrambles to an upright position as d'Eon stands up and faces away.
"You're not ready for a relationship," They say again. d'Eon pauses, finding the words. "Yet. And that's okay. I can wait."
They look over their shoulder at Ritsuka, hands clasped behind their back. "I look forward to the day we rendezvous, Master. And don't worry about Shielder; she seems enthusiastic about our Ménage à trois."
They head off before Ritsuka can say anything else, leaving him alone in the silence again. He thinks he saw the ghost of a smile, or the slightest flush on their cheeks, maybe even a skip in d'Eon's step as they left. It makes no sense to him. It must have been his eyes tricking him.
This happens distressingly often with him. He stands up, leaning against an upright section of his room's wall, trying to get a grip on himself.
"...Wait, d'Eon said threesome in french," he mutters, eyes widening slowly in realisation and shock. He looks up at the ceiling and frowns. "Huh..."
He sits there, not even caring that there is a giant hole in his wall at this hour of the day.
"...Dad, it's me. An androgynous french spy with the power to change their gender on demand has offered to partake in a threeway with me and my crush. Are you proud of me?"
There is no answer. Of course there wouldn't be, his father is dead with the incineration of humanity, and will be until he saves the timeline. But somehow, Ritsuka can feel his father's resigned, supportive nod.
- End Chapter Eight -
Late at night, in the kitchen, Arturia Pendragon sits at the counter eating a parfait, surrounded by a pile of dessert cups. Archer stands beside her, cleaning a plate to radiant perfection with a dishrag.
"...Archer, I get the feeling you gave Ritsuka the talk." The King of Knights looks over at him, an alternate version of the man she loves. "Tell me, did you know Ritsuka has never received the confessions of another girl?"
She sticks her leg out, just in time to catch the plate just right to keep it from shattering. You know, because Archer drops it.
"...Excuse me?" He asks, an eyebrow raised. "From what Kana tells me, he was the Tohsaka of his generation, a beloved and respected honor student with many admirers. How did he of all people never receive a love confession?"
"Kana," Arturia replies simply, and all becomes clear. She takes another bite of parfait and delights in the almonds mingling in the ice cream. "Incidentally, Kana is much the same. Ritsuka fought off all of her admirers."
"...I told him about Reinforcement with the assumption that he was ready for it," Archer says with growing horror. "I have failed on every level."
"Ritsuka already knows about Reinforcement," Arturia says casually. Archer ignores her; best she not know, even if she knows exactly the kind of 'Reinforcement' he means.
"...In retrospect, I should have just told him to look out for Le Chevalier d'Eon," EMIYA sighs.
"Mm. Probably." Arturia plants her spoon into the cup with a clatter and pushes it towards the Red Man. "Another, please."
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Rogue Gemini
Wanderer without a Twin
- Location
- Here
Damn you, you sexy androgynous French Servant!
Mizu
Software Developer
- Location
- Victoria, Australia
their quarters. What they
Did you intend to have the link not cover the M and s?
When indeed. Not like a french spy is known for feats of raw strength either, so tis a mystery for the ages why they even have that.
meganeshounen
*tips glasses*
- Location
- Far East Asia
Stupid sexy gender-fluid(?) French spymaster.
Wait, Strength A?
S/He could beat EMIYA in an arm wrestling match?
Alongside Abigail, that is.
Wait, Strength A?
S/He could beat EMIYA in an arm wrestling match?
Alongside Abigail, that is.
Some things transcend even the incineration of humanity.
- Location
- Lost in Hell
The real question, of course, is if they end up calling Mordred "Big Sister" or "Cousin" when she inevitably gets summoned.
Welcome to Nasuverse, you're already one of us if that's the only thing you're questioning.
- Location
- Singapore
They know that Arturia's actually their godmother and she helped raise them, so she's basically their second mother anyways.
In the meme spectrum, Arturia is "MCDONALDS! MCDONALDS! MCDONALDS", Shirou is "We have better food at home", and Rin goes into the drive-thru as the children cheer, buys one black coffee, and leaves.
. And it seems likes Ritsuka is unready to inherit the Emiya/Tohsaka magnetism. He has much to learn 
.
Base parameters of the Saber class container are Strentgh A, Agility B, Endurance B, Mana C, Luck D.
D'Eon's stats are Strength A, Agility B, Endurance B, Mana C, Luck A.
So, D'Eon's stats basically running off of the class container, bar Luck. That's why they have A-rank Strength.
Also, I totally ship Mashu, D'Eon and Ritsuka now. Good job, Swordomatic.
D'Eon's stats are Strength A, Agility B, Endurance B, Mana C, Luck A.
So, D'Eon's stats basically running off of the class container, bar Luck. That's why they have A-rank Strength.
Also, I totally ship Mashu, D'Eon and Ritsuka now. Good job, Swordomatic.
- Location
- Singapore
Blame @shinaobi for this one, he pushed super hard and convinced me it would be amazing. And he was right.
all fictions
I hate you! (it's not against the rules!)
- Location
- Mons Regius
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Not really shipping it, but it's still funny so...¯\_(ツ)_/¯
- Location
- USA
Among others, one thing I would like to compliment the story on @Swordomatic, is the lack of character bloat. It's my biggest issue with a couple of other fics like Fragments of Chaldea. And I'm thinking, your deliberate choice to only bring a few servants from each singularity should keep the bloat down significantly. So Kudos for that.
Seihai-kun
[Unverified Wish Granting Device]
- Location
- Brasil
I'm going to miss Kiyohime. @Swordomatic did you at least inflict Liz and her singing on the Orleans party?
I want you to understand that, no matter WHAT is actually chosen, my mental image of Jack's shorts are going to be the biggest, baggiest, most EYE-SEARINGLY HIDEOUS Bermuda shorts in existence.
No one knows where she finds them. No one knows why she chooses to wear them. No one can stop Medea's anguished screams every time they cross her line of sight.
Oh, shit! d'Eon has peered behind the 4th wa-
-nope, never mind. Everything's fine.
That is... one of the traditional starting options, yes.
Mashu... I don't think d'Eon really has the intention of asking him OUT. More... a night in, as it were. You know. For bangin'.
Also: D'awww, look at Mashu being all firm and open and stuff... this will not end well for her, will it.
I take that back, it appears to be going GREAT.
...maybe Mashu just has a thing for crossdressers and/or androgyny? Quick Ritsuka! Dress yourself in d'Eon's outfit and see how Mashu reacts! I'm sure d'Eon would have no problems with letting you borrow it! Heck, they'd probably help you put it on
My god, it's like someone wrote a love letter to me and the font is Le Chevalier d'Eon.
I want you to know that it took me somewhere around five re-reads before I noticed that "like."
Luckily, I did... so I can make THIS joke:
"Because everyone agreed there can only be ONE winner for the title of "World's Shittiest Lovers?""
I mean, just wait until... wait. *Googles* ...how the shit has Giacomo Casanova NEVER been in the Nasu-verse? ...well, that's lucky for Ritsuka, at least. (Or very unlucky, depending on your views.)
Well. Now this presents a conundrum. Do I go with the OBVIOUS musical reference:
Orrrrr... the OBVIOUS musical reference:
"But I've come to realize... certain things about you, namely your ability to understand subtle hints like I'm currently giving you, so... I've prepared a series of explanatory aides to help you realize what I'm saying here. We'll start with this book."
"Oh, the Places It'll Go: Your Manhood and Me?!"
"The drawings I commissioned are suitably tasteful while remaining... definitive, I assure you."
Awwww, look at d'Eon being all respectful of Ritsuka's boundaries and emotions! ...which I think makes them the sole exception that proves the rule in Chaldea, right?
*puerile giggle* Ritsuka is, apparently, an ass man.
...some variation of this scene is going to be a daily event, isn't it. (Be aware that no matter what you say, Swordo, I'm going to ignore it in favor of my own personal belief that d'Eon intercepts Ritsuka at least once every 24 hours. "Are you ready yet, Ritsuka?" "I AM IN THE SHOWER!" "...ah, that's still a 'no,' then. Very well. Until the morrow, then.")
RITSUKA_BRAIN.EXE has crashed. Would you like to (A)bort, (R)etry, (F)lail?
(I was going to make a joke about how all mental processes have been taken over by... a different portion of Ritsuka's anatomy, but... I decided to take the high road, for once! Just to keep you all on your toes!)
I'm sure he is, Ritsuka. Hell, I'm pretty sure EVERYONE is. I know I am!
...great. And now I can't stop imagining GARcher as being part of a rap duo. (My money's on Cu Chulainn as the other half, for the record.)
You spell "Credit" really weird. (And yes. He's right. It's AMAZING.)
Because a good bunch of female Servants (and good portion of males) will happily murderize him on sight? I can see D'Eon and Atalanta basically pulling a string to have Demiya or Kiritsugu 'accidents' him. Or asking Giles (Caster) to do some 'experiments' on him.
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