What priorities does God have? I don't get it.

Why's Ishtar pursuing him in the first place? I know Ereshkigal is shown to be attracted to the protagonist, alongside a few other servant, but I didn't think Ishtar was one of 'em?
FSO Ishtar is attracted to Ritsuka for reasons I won't get into but are pretty funny if I say so myself.
 
Chapter Fourteen - Pt. 3
"That. Was a six hour lesson." Waver Velvet, the former Lord El-Melloi II, Professor of the El-Melloi Class and now-and-forever Lady Reines El-Melloi Archisortie's man-bitch, sighs heavily and then takes a long sip from a piping hot cup of earl grey, a cup so hot his glasses fog over immediately and a sip so long that the King of Britain next to him has enough time to finish her cup of green tea and pour a new one before he's finished.

It was a rather large cup he had. And he has many grievances to air. Mostly about her charge and goddaughter.

Arturia Pendragon, an experienced hand at managing such dramatic bitchery, does not bat an eyelid as she takes the earl grey teapot and refills his cup for him. "That bad, huh? I can sympathise. I tried to teach that girl english composition for three years."

"She at least thinks english is an important life skill. Her english is comprehensible - for a japanese girl."

"You woefully underestimate how much she wants to be a magical superhero, and you greatly overestimate how much effort it took to teach her the difference between 'your' and 'you're'." Saber takes a long sip from her teacup this time, though it is not as long as the Professor's. She's not nearly so dramatic, after all. "And her english is impeccable how dare you." Arturia sniffs. "She even has a slight british accent."

"...A strange thing to be proud of, but okay." Waver Velvet looks at his reflection in the tea, and his sigh causes ripples in its surface. "She understands so much on the surface level. She has a good memory and strong cognitive abilities, but she struggles when it comes to the metaphorical. Which, when concerning mystical matters, is a problem."

"It can't be that bad."

"She told me that swords were sharp metal objects used as weapons by various cultures that may or may not have been adapted from farming implements, and were objectively speaking the best sort of weapon because they couldn't be used for other purposes. Which, besides being objectively false, shows a stunning lack of depth to her thought process."

Saber sucks on her teeth. "That is quite bad. But in my experience, you need to adjust your own paradigms when it comes to Kana. She struggles when given her own framework because she's so solidly talented in most regards… which teaches her a lot of easy shortcuts which undermine the actual learning outcomes. Most likely, Kana has already internalised the basics of magecraft, which affect her ability to wrap her mind around the more esoteric mindset that she needs to invent new magecraft for herself."

Waver looks at her. He nods, and in a matter of moments has a pen and notebook out, scribbled with notes. Saber hums as he writes everything down, pleased as an educator to help another - and smug as a King to have gotten one up over Rider's Master. "Mm… So I will need to break her preconceptions somehow before I can teach her. Tiresome, but necessary. Why is it always the prodigies who give the most trouble?"

"Because you only teach prodigies, Lord El-Melloi II."

"Saber, please. I relinquished that title ten years ago."

"Perhaps," the King of Britain says. "But to those you've touched, you will always be Lord El-Melloi II. How many of your students still call you that?"

"...More than a few." A little bitter, the Professor looks at Saber's tea. "How can you stand drinking that bitter swill?"

Arturia groans. "We are not having this conversation again, Waver Velvet. Green Tea has antioxidant properties. It is healthy."

"So is Earl Grey. It aids in digestion. Though I suppose your stomach needs no assistance."

Saber's tummy roars like a dragon. The King herself is unbowed, though she twitches in place as blood rushes to her cheeks. But only for a moment. "It is dinnertime, Waver Velvet. There is no shame in feeling hungry at dinnertime."

"I've seen you eat. There is much to be shameful of."

"You dare."

"Now now, settle down." Archer arrives, as ever an angel of comforts and mediation, and sets down a grill platter before Saber's eyes. A small robot slides over with fish and chips for the Professor not long after, before any protest can be made. The King, her hunger answered, digs in with dignity. The joy on her face with every bite turns infectious; everyone eating can't help but feel satisfied with their meal.

Now, watching from a distance, Waver Velvet cannot help but think of another student of his. An assistant with a heavy burden to bear, one she struggles to carry even now. And because of the King next to him, intentionally or not. He sighs, thinking back to their own adventures, solving magical mishaps like the office gopher, always thinking back to the 'whydunnit'.

...The why, huh?

"Archer." The Counter Guardian looks over with a blank expression. "Tell me, why do you think Kana insists on avoiding her magic?"

Archer nods, catching on quickly. "The image of her spellcasting is ultimately me. Which is stupid. I am the opposite of the ideal magus." He raises an eyebrow. "Do you want my help in shattering her preconceptions? Pardon my intrusion, but I did overhear your conversation with Saber."

Waver shakes his head. "It would be of great benefit to her. She needs to understand that her paradigm, the whydunnit of her magecraft, is flawed - and only then can she create something properly suited for her."

Archer nods. "Then I shall bring her tomorrow."

"Excellent. You have my thanks, Archer."

Saber, feeling competitive, huffs. "And yet, without my insight into her learning mindset, you would have never come to this conclusion at all. So where are my thanks, Waver Velvet?"

He sighs.

----

"I will begin my thesis thusly: Swords are stupid. They have no inherent meaning. All they do is kill and kill and kill. They are worthless tools whose only purpose is to destroy. That is all they are. That is all they will ever be. All meaning ascribed to the sword is virtual, as meaningless as broken promises. They are the weapon equivalent of a one-trick pony with no redeeming qualities save for how thoroughly they debase themselves in trying to perform their singular trick."

As Archer continues his spiel, his expression never changing yet his presence growing more severe, Waver cannot help but wonder if he's made a mistake. Ritsuka, who has been slowly inching away since the start of this makeup lesson, is already at the door. Mashu, who is not so wise, is listening with rapt attention and growing horror. D'Eon has already dematerialised and left. And Kana, the focus of today's lesson, has the sort of expression one would make after losing all the joy in their life.

...That is to say, Archer's expression.

"A-Archer, what about… What about Excalibur? It's a sword with lots of meaning!"

He gives her an unreadable look. "Ask Saber what Excalibur does on its own, and she will tell you it kills. Whether a man or a fortress, it simply destroys. That is all."

"B-But you're a sword!" She sobs.

"And I'm stupid." He tilts his head. "I thought that was clear. Swords are stupid, Kana. They have no meaning. So--"

Kana screams and breaks down, sobbing inconsolably. Ritsuka, whose hand was already on the doorknob and ready to escape, rushes over to comfort her while Mashu runs out to get something nice.

"--You need to make your own meaning, because nothing matters, so you have to make it matter." Archer blinks. "Was it something I said?"

"YES!" Ritsuka roars. "God dammit Archer she's crying now! Get out!"

Archer pauses. "I'm sorry I'm stupid."

"I'M SORRY I'M STUPID!" Kana wails.

"I SAID GET OUT!"

He bows and dematerialises. Waver sighs.

Well, hopefully it teaches her something.

----

"So Kana told me she's giving up on magecraft entirely," Saber tells him later at night. A kebab skewer in hand, she looks at Waver significantly before taking a bite. "What did Archer tell her?"

"Swords are stupid and meaningless, apparently."

"Mm. That's not good. I was actually expecting him to bribe her." Saber takes another skewer and considers it briefly, meat juices dripping down the stick. "You need to restore her faith in magic. Failing that, you need to terrify her into understanding that magic is the only thing that can help her now. I recommend bringing up the Kaleidosticks."

"...The Wizard Marshall's failed project?" Waver shakes his head. "That's just cruel and unusual."

"Mm." Saber says nothing, for she feasts. "Well, then this is out of my dollhouse, as they say."

Well. That's helpful.

"I've been extremely helpful that do you mean?" Saber tut-tuts at Waver. "Alas, if you truly are lost, I can talk to her."

This might end poorly as well, Waver thinks. But what the hell, everything might. "Please do. For her sake."
 
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I confess, I don't think I fully get where Archer was going with his explanation.
 
Kana screams and breaks down, sobbing inconsolably. Ritsuka, whose hand was already on the doorknob and ready to escape, rushes over to comfort her while Mashu runs out to get something nice.
Wow, stellar parenting skills Archer. First day of the year and you already made your daughter cry.

Clearly 2020 is going to absolutely suck for Kana.
 
He's trying to tell her 'everything you think you know about sword magecraft is stupid so start from nothing, it only matters because you think it matters', but a mix of a lack of proficiency in magecraft combined with his incredible self loathing lead to it being a very heated speech.

So yeah he's stupid.
 
"I will begin my thesis thusly: Swords are stupid. They have no inherent meaning. All they do is kill and kill and kill. They are worthless tools whose only purpose is to destroy. That is all they are. That is all they will ever be. All meaning ascribed to the sword is virtual, as meaningless as broken promises. They are the weapon equivalent of a one-trick pony with no redeeming qualities save for how thoroughly they debase themselves in trying to perform their singular trick."
Vicious. That is some deep seeded self loathing.
 
hey, he was working toward " if it have no meaning then give it one"

that part is important, the rest is just padding
 
"She at least thinks English is an important life skill. Her English is comprehensible - for a Japanese girl."
Oof. Also, FTFY.
Saber sucks on her teeth. "That is quite bad. But in my experience, you need to adjust your own paradigms when it comes to Kana. She struggles when given her own framework because she's so solidly talented in most regards… which teaches her a lot of easy shortcuts which undermine the actual learning outcomes. Most likely, Kana has already internalised the basics of magecraft, which affect her ability to wrap her mind around the more esoteric mindset that she needs to invent new magecraft for herself."
Sounds like how most people do when trying to grasp the intricacies of Nasuverse metaphysics.
"Because you only teach prodigies, Lord El-Melloi II."

"Saber, please. I relinquished that title ten years ago."
And do you think anyone actually cared?
"So is Earl Grey. It aids in digestion. Though I suppose your stomach needs no assistance."

Saber's tummy roars like a dragon. The King herself is unbowed, though she twitches in place as blood rushes to her cheeks. But only for a moment. "It is dinnertime, Waver Velvet. There is no shame in feeling hungry at dinnertime."

"I've seen you eat. There is much to be shameful of."

"You dare."
Ouch, Waver stinging again.
"Now now, settle down." Archer arrives, as ever an angel of comforts and mediation, and sets down a grill platter before Saber's eyes. A small robot slides over with fish and chips for the Professor not long after, before any protest can be made. The King, her hunger answered, digs in with dignity. The joy on her face with every bite turns infectious; everyone eating can't help but feel satisfied with their meal.

"I will begin my thesis thusly: Swords are stupid. They have no inherent meaning. All they do is kill and kill and kill. They are worthless tools whose only purpose is to destroy. That is all they are. That is all they will ever be. All meaning ascribed to the sword is virtual, as meaningless as broken promises. They are the weapon equivalent of a one-trick pony with no redeeming qualities save for how thoroughly they debase themselves in trying to perform their singular trick."

As Archer continues his spiel, his expression never changing yet his presence growing more severe, Waver cannot help but wonder if he's made a mistake. Ritsuka, who has been slowly inching away since the start of this makeup lesson, is already at the door. Mashu, who is not so wise, is listening with rapt attention and growing horror. D'Eon has already dematerialised and left. And Kana, the focus of today's lesson, has the sort of expression one would make after losing all the joy in their life.

...That is to say, Archer's expression.

"A-Archer, what about… What about Excalibur? It's a sword with lots of meaning!"

He gives her an unreadable look. "Ask Saber what Excalibur does on its own, and she will tell you it kills. Whether a man or a fortress, it simply destroys. That is all."

"B-But you're a sword!" She sobs.

"And I'm stupid." He tilts his head. "I thought that was clear. Swords are stupid, Kana. They have no meaning. So--"

"Mm. That's not good. I was actually expecting him to bribe her." Saber takes another skewer and considers it briefly, meat juices dripping down the stick. "You need to restore her faith in magic. Failing that, you need to terrify her into understanding that magic is the only thing that can help her now. I recommend bringing up the Kaleidosticks."
That's evil, cruel, and you should be ashamed of yourself.
"...The Wizard Marshall's failed project?" Waver shakes his head. "That's just cruel and unusual."
That's what I said!
"I've been extremely helpful that do you mean?" Saber tut-tuts at Waver. "Alas, if you truly are lost, I can talk to her."

This might end poorly as well, Waver thinks. But what the hell, everything might. "Please do. For her sake."
 
What priorities does God have? I don't get it.
Think about Jeanne's vast tracts of land. Then go look at other 'holy' figures. Think about it.

Why's Ishtar pursuing him in the first place? I know Ereshkigal is shown to be attracted to the protagonist, alongside a few other servant, but I didn't think Ishtar was one of 'em?
Ishtar? No clue, but she really shouldn't need to/want to, beyond possibly messing with his head and getting a bit of revenge against her 'host' due to having been shamed horribly in Babylonnia. So going vamp/cougar on Ritsuka, while internal Rin can only look on in pure horror....
Yeah, that's Ishtar.

Ereshkigal on the other hand outright has the major hots for him. What makes it even more enjoyable/hilarious is that there isn't a drop of mental corruption involved. She fell for him, down in the Underworld, WITHOUT needing a Pseudo-Servant body, thus its actually 100% honest attraction. Hell, he's basically her First Love/First Boy Wins, and almost slides into Childhood Love Interest, considering just how long she waited for him to be even born.

Except, since Divine Spirits can't quuuuuite think like a human...she goes out and snatches up another Rin, who isn't his mother, thinking that alone would make it all okay. Cue a horribly, horribly confused Ritsuka.

Also explains (in my head at least) why Mash didn't start beating her to death with her shield, as she knows Ereshkigal was being honest and at least trying to make him comfortable. Failing, but at least trying honestly.
 
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Ritsuka is fiscally responsible, and shows enough horrified shock when Ishtar showed up that she attributes it to his own attraction. And then across Babylonia she eventually decides it's only natural that Ritsuka belongs to her.

Mashu does nearly fight her to the death until Ritsuka stops her - so he can fight her to the death instead, though that fight is interrupted by the sun setting.
 
Ritsuka is fiscally responsible, and shows enough horrified shock when Ishtar showed up that she attributes it to his own attraction. And then across Babylonia she eventually decides it's only natural that Ritsuka belongs to her.

Mashu does nearly fight her to the death until Ritsuka stops her - so he can fight her to the death instead, though that fight is interrupted by the sun setting.
Early Eresh reveal on the account of Ishtar being Ishtar :V?
 
Early Eresh reveal on the account of Ishtar being Ishtar :V?
Find out when Babylonia begins this year. :V

There is only one thing I will confirm for FSO Babylonia, and that is that Ritsuka and Gilgamesh turn into frenemies. None of this anime deference and obedience, Ritsuka just doesn't care.

Gil doesn't think he needs Chaldea? Fine! He'll just go and work on public ordnance instead!
 
"I will begin my thesis thusly: Swords are stupid. They have no inherent meaning. All they do is kill and kill and kill. They are worthless tools whose only purpose is to destroy. That is all they are. That is all they will ever be. All meaning ascribed to the sword is virtual, as meaningless as broken promises. They are the weapon equivalent of a one-trick pony with no redeeming qualities save for how thoroughly they debase themselves in trying to perform their singular trick."
Meti, is that you?
 
Gil doesn't think he needs Chaldea? Fine! He'll just go and work on public ordnance instead!
...so, Ritsuka is borrowing renting (Archer!)Gilgamesh's treasures to create his own Dingir(s)? :D

I mean, I could see Kana getting away with it (Gil likes her outright, whereas Ritz gets dunked on)...
 
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You just aren't a proper Emiya until (a) Gilgamesh calls you a Faker, I guess :V.
Funny thing is....

Since they are back in time to Gilgamesh's own era, that means anything they create ISN'T A FAKE LONG SINCE MADE BY OTHERS. Think on that for a second. This is back when Gil is still collecting all his treasures, and hasn't finished yet. Gorgon & Tiamet interrupted him first. Thus anything Ritsuka builds, while it might be from half-remembered plans or sketches he saw, its more than likely he is one one that actually invented it in the first place....
 
The poor girl just got a small glimpse of how badly Archer broke as a counter-guardian.

Man Archer is a really poor speaker. If he didn't go on a rant on how worthless he was (and therefore Kana in her mind because she thinks she's a sword as well) then maybe his actual message would've been conveyed to her.

And while everyone is looking forward to Babylonia and the coming rejected Oedipus complex, I'm more interested in how Camelot will play out. Because Saber is obviously going to be there to fight her evil divine and bountiful alternative older version of herself.

Plus Bedivere will be so confused when there are two version of his king about to fight each other to the death. I can already see the banter and trash talk. Actually, I might as well write it all down.

Omake: Camelot Trash Talk

Saber: Come Bedivere! We will topple this false King off my throne.

Lion King: Fool! You dare command my knight against me?!

Saber: You didn't even remember he existed until a moment ago! And that was because our memories synchronized during our clash! He's obviously my knight, not yours.

(Since Saber and Lion King are technically the same person like how Shirou and Archer are, the memory transfer probably could happen)

Lion King: He is the Bedivere of this singularity. My knight who foolishly didn't obey me when I told him to throw my sword into the lake and caused me to become a wraith before goddess. He needs to make it up to me.

Saber: You tarnished everything it means to be a knight!

Lion King: And yet, you don't see me commenting on all the disgraceful things you did with your second chance at life. To think you would become a mistress of all things.

Saber: We are in a loving relationship thank you very much.

Lion King: Is it really when you have the body of a thirteen year old?

Saber: This body stopped aging when I was sixteen.

Lion King: Funny. You look thirteen to me. And probably to Bedivere and those masters over there as well.

Saber: And you look stupid. Your boobs are the size of my head. And you wear no support. How can you even move without those things jiggling everywhere?

Lion King: This is the difference between you and me. That being, I'm the superior choice when it comes down to it. Why do you think so many of Knights of Round Table followed me over you? It was certainly not for my personality.

Saber: You bitch! I'll kill you!
 
Saber: And you look stupid. Your boobs are the size of my head. And you wear no support. How can you even move without those things jiggling everywhere?

Lion King: This is the difference between you and me. That being, I'm the superior choice when it comes down to it. Why do you think so many of Knights of Round Table followed me over you? It was certainly not for my personality.

Saber: You bitch! I'll kill you!
At least our Goddess is enlightened.
 
The poor girl just got a small glimpse of how badly Archer broke as a counter-guardian.

Man Archer is a really poor speaker. If he didn't go on a rant on how worthless he was (and therefore Kana in her mind because she thinks she's a sword as well) then maybe his actual message would've been conveyed to her.

And while everyone is looking forward to Babylonia and the coming rejected Oedipus complex, I'm more interested in how Camelot will play out. Because Saber is obviously going to be there to fight her evil divine and bountiful alternative older version of herself.

Plus Bedivere will be so confused when there are two version of his king about to fight each other to the death. I can already see the banter and trash talk. Actually, I might as well write it all down.

Omake: Camelot Trash Talk

Saber: Come Bedivere! We will topple this false King off my throne.

Lion King: Fool! You dare command my knight against me?!

Saber: You didn't even remember he existed until a moment ago! And that was because our memories synchronized during our clash! He's obviously my knight, not yours.

(Since Saber and Lion King are technically the same person like how Shirou and Archer are, the memory transfer probably could happen)

Lion King: He is the Bedivere of this singularity. My knight who foolishly didn't obey me when I told him to throw my sword into the lake and caused me to become a wraith before goddess. He needs to make it up to me.

Saber: You tarnished everything it means to be a knight!

Lion King: And yet, you don't see me commenting on all the disgraceful things you did with your second chance at life. To think you would become a mistress of all things.

Saber: We are in a loving relationship thank you very much.

Lion King: Is it really when you have the body of a thirteen year old?

Saber: This body stopped aging when I was sixteen.

Lion King: Funny. You look thirteen to me. And probably to Bedivere and those masters over there as well.

Saber: And you look stupid. Your boobs are the size of my head. And you wear no support. How can you even move without those things jiggling everywhere?

Lion King: This is the difference between you and me. That being, I'm the superior choice when it comes down to it. Why do you think so many of Knights of Round Table followed me over you? It was certainly not for my personality.

Saber: You bitch! I'll kill you!
Exceeeeeeept.....there's Mr. Lolicon Knight.

One of the few times in existence that Stheno & Euryale actually were useful.
 
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I'm looking forward to London and Camelot so much. Babylonia's where the family stuff becomes most relevant, but honestly it already starts coming into play by London and that's when it gets fun to write.
 
Since they are back in time to Gilgamesh's own era, that means anything they create ISN'T A FAKE LONG SINCE MADE BY OTHERS. Think on that for a second. This is back when Gil is still collecting all his treasures, and hasn't finished yet. Gorgon & Tiamet interrupted him first. Thus anything Ritsuka builds, while it might be from half-remembered plans or sketches he saw, its more than likely he is one one that actually invented it in the first place....

The Kaleidoscope and parallel worlds make things more complicated though, because there's every bit a possibility that Ritsuka is merely creating a new branch in Gilgamesh era, where he introduces ideas from his home-branch to Gilgamesh's time, and in turn creates a new branch in Gilgamesh's time. From the perspective of this new branch, whatever Ritsuka creates is invented by himself from that perspective of this branch... but from the perspective of Ritsuka's home branch, Ritsuka's a faker and plagiarizer who stole ideas from his own time, and published it in another time.

Of course, Singularities aren't quite Branch time-lines, but anomalies in Ritsuka's native time-line. It begs the question then whether one could actually invent anything within a Singularity when one's inventions comes from ideas that one first learns of outside the Singularity brought into that Singularity. Something tells me Caster Gil would simply still call Ritsuka a Faker, only one who has the galls to import fakes across the branches of Time (and hence he one-up his father in that regard).


The poor girl just got a small glimpse of how badly Archer broke as a counter-guardian.

Man Archer is a really poor speaker. If he didn't go on a rant on how worthless he was (and therefore Kana in her mind because she thinks she's a sword as well) then maybe his actual message would've been conveyed to her.

It's a shame Kana didn't hear the most important part, which Archer left for last. She's free. The Magics of her Brother and her Mother are bound to the legacy of the Tokhsaka crest, and therefore cannot be freely defined. But because a Sword has no inherent meaning, she is free to construct whatever meaning her heart desires to the Sword that is herself. She's free and Ritsuka is a slave to the Tohsaka Crest, since I don't think Ritsuka's sense of responsibility allows him to decline eventually inheriting and building on top of the crest inherited from his mother (which is why Gilgamesh suplexes him, because this sense of responsibility probably makes Ritsuka as boring as Tokiomi from his majesty's viewpoint.)


She, on the other hand, has to build her magic from foundations up, but it also means that she isn't obligated to build on the foundations of her father, and she really shouldn't because she must define her own meaning, because she is not Shirou/Archer and should not ever be Shirou/Archer. So starting again from the fundamentals is necessary because it gives her the building blocks to define herself. Honestly, I think GIlgamesh is disappointed in her: why would someone of that kind of liberty sacrifice it to imitate a Faker? She is clearly a superior Sword to the Faker of her Father - Damascus Steel to a Copper Knife. Kana has more freedom than just about any other daughter born to a Magus in her own time-line, why forsake that freedom? There is probably any number of children born to Magi of her age group that would utterly envy Kana's liberty.

Oh wow, I think that if Chloe Von Einzbern is ever summoned into Chaldea, there are going to be some fascinating conversations that Kana could have with Chloe about the inherent nature of being a Sword by relation to another Sword that might really help Kana greatly. It's after all the duty of Aunt Chloe to help her niece from another world... and if she can get Kana to call Chloe Aunt while calling Illya, Illya-chan, it proves once and for all Chloe is older than Illya.
 
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