Fate/Sunny Order (FGO)
- Thread starter Swordomatic
- Start date
- Location
- Not here
Local Moe adopts twin siblings, more at 11.
- Location
- minnesota
You could do the first Christmas event, I believe we're around there in the time line. Also I'm sure Ritsuka wouldn't mind sleeping for a week straight.
Also this could be used to bring Salter in if that's what you want.
Also this could be used to bring Salter in if that's what you want.
"Heh-hello? Okay, it's on. Ah, this is Doctor Roman, and I've got some good news and some bad news. The good news is that our Saint Graph Modulation system has been a complete success, and as soon as we work out a few bugs, we'll be able to flip all the Servants into alternate classes! This is a big success, and I'd like to thank everyone who contributed. The bad news is that our first test subject has escaped the lab and now she's roaming the base looking for fried food to shove into her mouth and fights to start. Please, for the love of god, do not provoke her. Just give her the Spam, Spam, Spam and Chips or whatever it is she wants, and do not engage her in any way that would prompt her to use Excalibur! We've already lost Media and Archer to her, let's try to avoid more casualties."
- Location
- United States
Ok now I want an omake of arturia,Ritsuka and Kana(and who ever else for added hilarity) watching Monty Python's search for the holy Grail.
MWKillKenny84
Lurking from the Trauma Switch.
- Location
- Vado Ligure
Considering what I found on the older Arthurian lore and how much sillyness was in Camelot's court?
I image Arturia cursing Merlin aka Tim, because she made him swore to never talk of the rabbit or of the knights that says "Ni!".
all fictions
I hate you! (it's not against the rules!)
- Location
- Mons Regius
- Pronouns
- He/Him
FGO is way ahead of you by having made it canon.Tristan's Interlude said:
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allfictions said:
Even in the original timeline, that guy's only good for NP spam, huh?
Sir Plusse
Overly Vicious Quester
- Location
- Kansas
To be fair, it's a REALLY GOOD support NP (on a Servant who's already pretty damn good at support). I mean, healing AND NP charging (however that'd translate out of "game-speak") AND limited probability manipulation? You'd better believe anyone who has him is gonna abuse the HELL out of a Noble Phantasm like that (and at risk of drawing the thread's ire, joking or otherwise: this includes me).
Even in the original timeline, that guy's only good for NP spam, huh?
Damian45
Only Sane Man
Have the wandering Swordswoman Musashi just wander in and be herself.
The only other idea is to shift to a more serious storyline. Like a sudden demon and corrupted Servant attack. After all, there is no reason for them not to be attacked, and the potential dynamics between allied and enemy Servants would funny depending on who it is.
- Location
- Ohio
A jealous man.
...Saber found out that Lancer stripped in front of Kana?
Medea will at least tell Roman how to not be a bad father....
Atlanta should at least have... opinons on how to deal with arguing children, although Kana and Ritsuka are too old for her definition of children, so her solution would probably be comically brutal.
Pleeeeeease summon Iri! Emiya needs an easily exploitable weakness! And Artoria will be happy, too! Until she realizes that getting glomped in public is kind of embarrassing....Now that's a thought, isn't it?
You know I might just do that.
It might go really well. The time Medea spent with her children could be some of the happiest moments she has, depending on interpretation.
William Tell is the only Heroic Spirit I can think of who had a quiet, fulfilling family life after his legend was over. Boudica and Marie had happy family lives until shit hit the fan.
Icipall
Don't worry, we can fanfix that!
- Location
- Cold snow fields of Finland
Goddammit, that's funny. :lol
- Location
- Not here
Another idea I've got is to have Martha teach Ritsuka the basics of Jacob's Limbs as a B-plot as to be better prepared for random suplexes from random Divine individuals.
Mattman324
you expected some anime, non-IRL giant robot, eh?
- Location
- Working in the basement on my giant robot.
Didn't she also, like, brutally murder them though.
Icipall
Don't worry, we can fanfix that!
- Location
- Cold snow fields of Finland
In some versions yes. Depending of the version of the story, Medea and Jason had up to 14 children.
Well, I mean-
"MAY YOU ROT IN TARTARUS, EURIPIDIES OF SALAMIS, AND MAY NOBODY REMEMBER YOU OR YOUR WORK IN FAVORABLY LIGHT FOR YEARS TO COME!!! AND CURSE YOU, CORINTHIANS, FOR THE DEATH OF MY CHILDREN!!! MAY YOUR CITY BURN AND NOBODY OF YOUR KIN SURVIVED YOUR BLOODLINE!!!"
-Um, yeah. Okay. Cool.
To be fair that's a lot more complicated of a thing then it at first seems. Outside of being only a 'sometimes' thing by her myths telling, one also needs to consider the circumstances of her family at the time. She was about to be discarded by Jason for a new 'proper' wife, and her kids were hence, about to become problematic for said father for legitimacy issues for any new kids he would have. This meant that it was highly likely that unless Jason was much more loyal to his kids then... well, anyone he's ever shown a hint of loyalty towards, then their future at best case, was likely to be disowned, which in that time and place would make them 'barbarian' children (due to their heritage and lack of any formal public standing).
More likely, those children from his first marriage would be 'dealt with' to avoid any chance of being used as tools by his political enemies, and to show off to his peers that he hadn't really been 'corrupted' by his marriage of convenience to this barbarian witch. Possibly by sacrificing them to the same gods who mindfucked Medea herself into this mess, or simply in a large, public (and likely very painful) display, since Jason was kind of hammy like that.
So, depending on the Jason of the time, there is a legit chance it was more a murder/suicide euthanasia thing from her POV. Better to let them die quick and quietly thinking their parents love them, rather then as discarded refuse publicly shamed and discarded before their drawn out execution.
One account says her children were murdered by Corinthians, which almost set-off Herc (who took residence there at some point). Another account said Hera tricked her to sacrifice them in her altar (Zeus tried to seduce Medea, Medea said no. Not good enough for Hera).
QuietlyObserving
The Railgun That Walks Like a Bear
- Location
- Here.
This is all in preparation for the Seventh Singularity, where Ritsuka canonically Justice Bombs Quetz, of course.
And when someone questions whether Gil knew it was coming with Sha Naqba Imuru and thus prepared him, he just smirks and walks off.
Kyte
Never quacked for this
To rain on the parade for a bit, doesn't he immediately follow up by saying it's a joke.
Sakuya's Butler
A refined Butler to a knife wielding Mistress.
- Location
- ↓, ↘, → + Punch
How Bullshit is Merlin?
I have Tamamo & Waver.
I killed non-nerfed Beast Kiara, no command seals used, no quartz used, using both of them and a support Merlin, in 115 turns. No deaths.
That's right. NORMAL attacks only as not one of the three have NPs that do damage. She simply couldn't do damage fast enough with Merlin's healing stacking with Tamamo's, and Merlin's All-Invincible skill kept her NP from doing anymore more than giving my team a free peep show. Ultimate climax denial team FTW.
He's a shitty dick wizard, but he's Chaldea's shitty dick wizard.
-=-=-=-=-=-
Well, Rits had to find someone to fill in the genki Big Sis Harem Route year round, considering Martha only fills that during the summer months before going back to normal.
The REAL fun however, will begin once Astraea shows up.
At which point, this happens:
-=-=-=-=-
Gets even funnier...
Ishtar is of course, sharing the host body of their mother. As of Babylon, at least how it sounds in the NA translation, she had to use Rin's body the entire time. Before AND after becoming a summon. Useless goddess...
Eresh on the other hand, only temporarily inhabits Rin's body, and later meets the Master(s) in person, in her own body. And while looking incredibly close to Rin, isn't in Rin's body (that or is using Fate/Extra's Rin's body, who is canonically blonde, who isn't technically the twin's mother) after being summoned. And unlike Ishtar, who is 'fond' of their Master, Eresh is out and out head over heels for their Master.
Meanwhile, Gil is laughing so hard he's practically falling over, tears flowing freely from laughing that hard. Due to seeing Ishtar get called 'Mom/Mother', and the look on her face, even as her sister manages to scoot closer to Rits. When nobody is looking that is, considering Miss Shyness herself (Eresh, Bestest Kouhai Eggplant, Serenity and NEET Doujin Princess start a club: Shy Servants Wishing To 'Serve' Master Ritsuka More. Kyohime not welcome. Meetings are every Tuesday at 6 in the bar. Jalter sneaks in on occasion and swears them to silence, or an everlasting firey burning hell if they reveal anything). Then watching Ishtar's face goes through contortions of biblical (or older) proportions, as she is conflicted between a mother horrified, and a sister deity who is scandalized.
Then Gil laughs, even harder.
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Chapter Thirteen - Pt. 4
- Location
- Singapore
The day has been at once productive and unproductive, Romani thinks as he stands before the sanctum of Medea of Colchis, an unassuming room with the same white door that basically every room in Chaldea has across the entire complex - and not even reinforced with metal or concrete. It is wood, perhaps laminated with plastic. And he can't open it.
Leonidas I of the Three Hundred Spartans told him that he has little experience as a father and to trust in the inherent goodness of his foster-not-daughter. Cu Chulainn, who is in retrospect responsible for killing his son he never met and thus an awful person to ask about advice, just said not to kill her. Which is useful advice in theory but… well he could never do that even if he wanted to. And he never will. Archer EMIYA, despite mothering the twins, is unwilling to provide advice - and seeing as firstly he is not their actual father and secondly they are currently beating each other through Chaldea, his advice might not actually be good either. And Jeanne, being Jeanne, doesn't even know where children came from.
And yet he feels like he knows the answer. He's always known. He's just scared of making the attempt. Just as he is scared of entering a Witch's Temple when the entire complex is on the hunt for a male weeb. The question now is… is he more afraid of getting zapped by a witch, or is he more afraid of confronting the girl he's raised?
Without another thought Roman grabs the door knob and steps through.
The first thing that hits him is the sea breeze - fresh, crisp, real. The second thing that hits him is that the sun is shining but he is not sweating. In fact, it is a comfortable, cooling beach. Unnaturally comfortable for a beach. The third thing is seeing a certain pair of Servants sitting around a table with a parasol sipping drinks and talking about their feelings without trying to kill one another.
Honestly it is the beach that really sells the artificial nature of this sanctum. Only a true master of Magecraft could make something as frustrating as the sun and sand so inviting.
"Ah, it was the doctor." Medea nods, only briefly sighing with regret, and the pressure drops tenfold. Roman only just realises how close he was to getting lasered and… probably getting chopped up and thrown into a cauldron, something about dismemberment for sure. And just as he thinks that, the once-Princess of Colchis scowls at him. "If you intend to think poorly of me, Director Romani, at least do so in the shade."
"It is nice," says Arturia Pendragon, King of the Britons, the Knights, the Britonian Knights, and possibly the Round Table as she sips on… not-tea for once. It looks like a cola. "Join us, doctor, it is a good day today!"
It is, somehow, so Roman does so. Taking a seat, Roman thinks that he could really use a drink, and at once tiny skeletons step from dust clouds and start pouring him a cocktail. They even provide the tiny umbrella before disappearing. He looks at it oddly, then at Medea.
"A simple working," the Caster says with pride and more than a little smug. "Now, what ails you?"
"Why aren't you and Saber trying to kill one another?" he blurts out. Fearfully, he expects Medea and Arturia to gang up on him in a fit of flustered frustration, but instead Medea laughs while Saber shakes her head with a smile.
"Caster and I have come to an agreement," Saber says. "She does not kidnap me or try to make me hers or kill my wards or… really anything evil, and I will hold my peace." Her smile grows a little strained, but relaxes just as quickly. "She is not so insufferable when she isn't on about dresses or cuteness or her beloved Kuzuki."
"Mostly, Saber amuses me with stories of the boya's skill at homemaking," Caster smirks. She leans forward, resting her head upon a hand, drumming her fingers as she looks at Roman. "But what really brings you here, Director? I doubt that Blackbeard has been chasing you."
Roman sighs and shakes his head. "No, I was… hoping to find some parenting advice."
At this, Saber perks up.
"From you, Caster."
Offended, Saber pouts and returns to angrily drinking from a straw.
"Hm." Caster looks upon Roman, now clasping her chin with her hand. "Well, Director, you are mistaken. I had been a parent, yes - but obviously, I was a mother. And what you probably want is advice from a father."
"There aren't many good fathers in Chaldea," Roman notes blithely. "Most of them are awful."
Caster nods. "Lancer?"
"Lancer, yes."
"You must be desperate." Now, Saber perks up again, though trying to seem uninterested. "Alas, I am at a loss myself," Caster laments.
Roman nods and slumps in his chair. "If only there was someone who helped raise wonderful children here."
Practically beaming parental instinct, Saber simply waits.
"Someone who has experience raising young boys and girls into capable men and women," Caster agrees.
Saber continues waiting, a self-assured smile on her face.
"Someone who has teaching experience?" Roman suggests.
"That would be good," Caster agrees.
Saber, all but assured, begins preening.
Roman nods. He stands up, hands on the table. "Thank you, Caster. I'll go find Lord El-Melloi II."
"A good choice," Caster agrees. "In my interactions with him he's proven to have a discerning eye. As a magus he's worthless, but as an educator…"
Their attention is drawn by the sound of glass shattering. They both look at Saber, who has shattered her cup in her hands, now clad in metal gauntlets. "I am right here," Saber seethes. "I am an excellent parent! And an excellent teacher!"
"You also murdered your son," Caster points out. "And unlike Lancer, you neglected Mordred so badly he lead a rebellion against you that lead to your death. So no, Saber. You might be worse than Lancer in that regard."
"I raised our Masters!"
And then the sky shatters. Ritsuka falls through first, followed shortly by Kana, who has her hand clasped around his face. They hit the ground heavily, smashing into the sand, before Kana lifts him up by the head and starts smashing him into the ground again.
"You mean those Masters?" Medea asks with a sarcastic smirk.
"Oh, God," Roman laments.
"Use your legs, Ritsuka!" Saber screams, standing on her chair. Ritsuka sputters and flails and is smashed into the sand again. "No, YOUR legs!"
----
Waver Velvet, the Lord El-Melloi II, Clocktower Lord and Pseudo-Servant of the legendary Zhuge Liang, sighs as he bites on an unlit cigar, hands in his pockets as he faces Romani Archaman. Behind him, both Ritsuka and Kana Tohsaka weep as they are locked up in the Stone Sentinel Maze, their battle finally inconclusively concluded in Kana's favour - but neither of their victory. Beside them, Mashu Kyrielight frets over the both of them, but is ultimately unable to help. "I take one smoke break and this happens," the legendary educator grumbles.
"It is nearly dinnertime," Medea of Colchis sniffs.
Wordlessly, Waver points at the idiots locked up behind him.
"...Well played, Professor," Medea chuckles, her voice melodious as she heads off to mend the hole in the sky-ceiling. "Well played indeed."
Ignoring her, Waver turns to Roman. "Anyways, you just need to give Miss Kyrielight some time. She is just acting out a bit of teenage rebellion. Nothing to worry about."
"She's never acted out teenage rebellion before!" Roman exclaims.
"She's never had a boy she liked that much either," Waver responds with an arched eyebrow.
"...Okay." Roman inhales sharply and nods. "Thank you, Professor." He frowns. "But what have you really been doing, this entire time?"
Waver lights his cigar and takes a puff, not once taking out his lighter. "Hunting."
Somehow, from that one word, Roman knows exactly what he means. "So Blackbeard's…"
"If you are going to enjoy japanese culture you should do so properly." He points back at Ritsuka and Kana with a thumb. "And as penance, the two of them can join him."
And it was at this moment that Romani Archaman knew he had a new father figure to look up to. But not in a weird way.
----
Locked within a theatre in the depths of Chaldea - personally built by Leonardo Da Vinci as a dungeon and promptly converted into a cinema by her easily-inspired mind - three pairs of eyes gaze upon japanese perfection.
"I love Jojo," Ritsuka says, a single tear falling from his eye.
"Crazy Diamond is Unbreakable," Kana says, sniffling as she does so.
"I'm sorry I called you a thot."
"I'm sorry I saved Eromanga Sensei from annihilation."
The two of them hug, their divisions mended. And Edward Teach, the legendary pirate Blackbeard, once the terror of the seas and now the terror of Chaldea's hallways, weeps openly in his restraints. "I have seen the light," he whispers, and all who heard it could earnestly say that it was so.
And so the dark reign of Blackbeard's degeneracy ends, replaced by the more benevolent reign of manly, muscular, posing men.
----
----
Long after hours, when the rest of Chaldea sleeps, two old men sigh as they reminisce over drinks in the Director's office. Glasses of wine arrayed before them, a tall golden pitcher of the same in between, Romani Archaman and Gilgamesh of Uruk drink quietly, with little raucousness or energy between the two of them. Just two old men, with shared experiences.
"Did you have enough fun today?" Romani asks bitterly. He sups at his glass, feeling the smooth red wine burn in the back of his throat. "Was it worth it just to get a laugh? People got hurt today."
"Bah," the King of Uruk scoffs. "No one died, and no one hurt seriously. They are but emotional pains, to grow from. Learn from." He raises his chalice to the light. "To reminisce."
Roman shakes his head. "What would he think, that you would willfully set Chaldea on fire just to satisfy your boredom?"
Gilgamesh looks sharply at him, but not with murderous intent. Merely irritation, felt towards a friend reminding them of a painful or embarrassing moment. "And what would she think, that you are responsible for inciting the incineration of man with poor wording and unresolved frustrations?"
Roman sighs and looks into his glass. "The only thing we can do now is look forward."
"And yet, the solution lies in the past," remarks the King of Heroes. "Ironic isn't it, Solomon?"
Roman sighs. "That life is over, Gilgamesh. You know this."
"Hmm," grunts the King.
The two of them sit quietly, alone with their thoughts and company.
"...At least neither of us put a dick on a girl," Roman notes idly.
"Aye, neither of us," agrees Gilgamesh. "...Though, now I wonder…"
"Gilgamesh no."
"Gilgamesh… maybe."
Leonidas I of the Three Hundred Spartans told him that he has little experience as a father and to trust in the inherent goodness of his foster-not-daughter. Cu Chulainn, who is in retrospect responsible for killing his son he never met and thus an awful person to ask about advice, just said not to kill her. Which is useful advice in theory but… well he could never do that even if he wanted to. And he never will. Archer EMIYA, despite mothering the twins, is unwilling to provide advice - and seeing as firstly he is not their actual father and secondly they are currently beating each other through Chaldea, his advice might not actually be good either. And Jeanne, being Jeanne, doesn't even know where children came from.
And yet he feels like he knows the answer. He's always known. He's just scared of making the attempt. Just as he is scared of entering a Witch's Temple when the entire complex is on the hunt for a male weeb. The question now is… is he more afraid of getting zapped by a witch, or is he more afraid of confronting the girl he's raised?
Without another thought Roman grabs the door knob and steps through.
The first thing that hits him is the sea breeze - fresh, crisp, real. The second thing that hits him is that the sun is shining but he is not sweating. In fact, it is a comfortable, cooling beach. Unnaturally comfortable for a beach. The third thing is seeing a certain pair of Servants sitting around a table with a parasol sipping drinks and talking about their feelings without trying to kill one another.
Honestly it is the beach that really sells the artificial nature of this sanctum. Only a true master of Magecraft could make something as frustrating as the sun and sand so inviting.
"Ah, it was the doctor." Medea nods, only briefly sighing with regret, and the pressure drops tenfold. Roman only just realises how close he was to getting lasered and… probably getting chopped up and thrown into a cauldron, something about dismemberment for sure. And just as he thinks that, the once-Princess of Colchis scowls at him. "If you intend to think poorly of me, Director Romani, at least do so in the shade."
"It is nice," says Arturia Pendragon, King of the Britons, the Knights, the Britonian Knights, and possibly the Round Table as she sips on… not-tea for once. It looks like a cola. "Join us, doctor, it is a good day today!"
It is, somehow, so Roman does so. Taking a seat, Roman thinks that he could really use a drink, and at once tiny skeletons step from dust clouds and start pouring him a cocktail. They even provide the tiny umbrella before disappearing. He looks at it oddly, then at Medea.
"A simple working," the Caster says with pride and more than a little smug. "Now, what ails you?"
"Why aren't you and Saber trying to kill one another?" he blurts out. Fearfully, he expects Medea and Arturia to gang up on him in a fit of flustered frustration, but instead Medea laughs while Saber shakes her head with a smile.
"Caster and I have come to an agreement," Saber says. "She does not kidnap me or try to make me hers or kill my wards or… really anything evil, and I will hold my peace." Her smile grows a little strained, but relaxes just as quickly. "She is not so insufferable when she isn't on about dresses or cuteness or her beloved Kuzuki."
"Mostly, Saber amuses me with stories of the boya's skill at homemaking," Caster smirks. She leans forward, resting her head upon a hand, drumming her fingers as she looks at Roman. "But what really brings you here, Director? I doubt that Blackbeard has been chasing you."
Roman sighs and shakes his head. "No, I was… hoping to find some parenting advice."
At this, Saber perks up.
"From you, Caster."
Offended, Saber pouts and returns to angrily drinking from a straw.
"Hm." Caster looks upon Roman, now clasping her chin with her hand. "Well, Director, you are mistaken. I had been a parent, yes - but obviously, I was a mother. And what you probably want is advice from a father."
"There aren't many good fathers in Chaldea," Roman notes blithely. "Most of them are awful."
Caster nods. "Lancer?"
"Lancer, yes."
"You must be desperate." Now, Saber perks up again, though trying to seem uninterested. "Alas, I am at a loss myself," Caster laments.
Roman nods and slumps in his chair. "If only there was someone who helped raise wonderful children here."
Practically beaming parental instinct, Saber simply waits.
"Someone who has experience raising young boys and girls into capable men and women," Caster agrees.
Saber continues waiting, a self-assured smile on her face.
"Someone who has teaching experience?" Roman suggests.
"That would be good," Caster agrees.
Saber, all but assured, begins preening.
Roman nods. He stands up, hands on the table. "Thank you, Caster. I'll go find Lord El-Melloi II."
"A good choice," Caster agrees. "In my interactions with him he's proven to have a discerning eye. As a magus he's worthless, but as an educator…"
Their attention is drawn by the sound of glass shattering. They both look at Saber, who has shattered her cup in her hands, now clad in metal gauntlets. "I am right here," Saber seethes. "I am an excellent parent! And an excellent teacher!"
"You also murdered your son," Caster points out. "And unlike Lancer, you neglected Mordred so badly he lead a rebellion against you that lead to your death. So no, Saber. You might be worse than Lancer in that regard."
"I raised our Masters!"
And then the sky shatters. Ritsuka falls through first, followed shortly by Kana, who has her hand clasped around his face. They hit the ground heavily, smashing into the sand, before Kana lifts him up by the head and starts smashing him into the ground again.
"You mean those Masters?" Medea asks with a sarcastic smirk.
"Oh, God," Roman laments.
"Use your legs, Ritsuka!" Saber screams, standing on her chair. Ritsuka sputters and flails and is smashed into the sand again. "No, YOUR legs!"
----
Waver Velvet, the Lord El-Melloi II, Clocktower Lord and Pseudo-Servant of the legendary Zhuge Liang, sighs as he bites on an unlit cigar, hands in his pockets as he faces Romani Archaman. Behind him, both Ritsuka and Kana Tohsaka weep as they are locked up in the Stone Sentinel Maze, their battle finally inconclusively concluded in Kana's favour - but neither of their victory. Beside them, Mashu Kyrielight frets over the both of them, but is ultimately unable to help. "I take one smoke break and this happens," the legendary educator grumbles.
"It is nearly dinnertime," Medea of Colchis sniffs.
Wordlessly, Waver points at the idiots locked up behind him.
"...Well played, Professor," Medea chuckles, her voice melodious as she heads off to mend the hole in the sky-ceiling. "Well played indeed."
Ignoring her, Waver turns to Roman. "Anyways, you just need to give Miss Kyrielight some time. She is just acting out a bit of teenage rebellion. Nothing to worry about."
"She's never acted out teenage rebellion before!" Roman exclaims.
"She's never had a boy she liked that much either," Waver responds with an arched eyebrow.
"...Okay." Roman inhales sharply and nods. "Thank you, Professor." He frowns. "But what have you really been doing, this entire time?"
Waver lights his cigar and takes a puff, not once taking out his lighter. "Hunting."
Somehow, from that one word, Roman knows exactly what he means. "So Blackbeard's…"
"If you are going to enjoy japanese culture you should do so properly." He points back at Ritsuka and Kana with a thumb. "And as penance, the two of them can join him."
And it was at this moment that Romani Archaman knew he had a new father figure to look up to. But not in a weird way.
- End Chapter Thirteen -
----
Locked within a theatre in the depths of Chaldea - personally built by Leonardo Da Vinci as a dungeon and promptly converted into a cinema by her easily-inspired mind - three pairs of eyes gaze upon japanese perfection.
"I love Jojo," Ritsuka says, a single tear falling from his eye.
"Crazy Diamond is Unbreakable," Kana says, sniffling as she does so.
"I'm sorry I called you a thot."
"I'm sorry I saved Eromanga Sensei from annihilation."
The two of them hug, their divisions mended. And Edward Teach, the legendary pirate Blackbeard, once the terror of the seas and now the terror of Chaldea's hallways, weeps openly in his restraints. "I have seen the light," he whispers, and all who heard it could earnestly say that it was so.
And so the dark reign of Blackbeard's degeneracy ends, replaced by the more benevolent reign of manly, muscular, posing men.
----
----
Long after hours, when the rest of Chaldea sleeps, two old men sigh as they reminisce over drinks in the Director's office. Glasses of wine arrayed before them, a tall golden pitcher of the same in between, Romani Archaman and Gilgamesh of Uruk drink quietly, with little raucousness or energy between the two of them. Just two old men, with shared experiences.
"Did you have enough fun today?" Romani asks bitterly. He sups at his glass, feeling the smooth red wine burn in the back of his throat. "Was it worth it just to get a laugh? People got hurt today."
"Bah," the King of Uruk scoffs. "No one died, and no one hurt seriously. They are but emotional pains, to grow from. Learn from." He raises his chalice to the light. "To reminisce."
Roman shakes his head. "What would he think, that you would willfully set Chaldea on fire just to satisfy your boredom?"
Gilgamesh looks sharply at him, but not with murderous intent. Merely irritation, felt towards a friend reminding them of a painful or embarrassing moment. "And what would she think, that you are responsible for inciting the incineration of man with poor wording and unresolved frustrations?"
Roman sighs and looks into his glass. "The only thing we can do now is look forward."
"And yet, the solution lies in the past," remarks the King of Heroes. "Ironic isn't it, Solomon?"
Roman sighs. "That life is over, Gilgamesh. You know this."
"Hmm," grunts the King.
The two of them sit quietly, alone with their thoughts and company.
"...At least neither of us put a dick on a girl," Roman notes idly.
"Aye, neither of us," agrees Gilgamesh. "...Though, now I wonder…"
"Gilgamesh no."
"Gilgamesh… maybe."
and lo! It was good
sasuga AUO
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