Remove ads

Dark Souls: Low Budget Quest [DROPPED]

[X] Not really - What does the Chainmail Man have to say about this fellow?

Guys! Super awesome idea!

We have this priest cast a healing miracle on the firekeeper!

No need for resurrection shenanigans to give her back her tongue!
 
[X] Nope - You gotta go. There's nothing to do here, time to head to the Undead Burg!
Gotta start getting some of that death and treasures
 
[X] Not really - What does the Chainmail Man have to say about this fellow?
​


Seeing as you had no business with Petrus, you and Oscar went away...

...Towards the Chainmail Man because you were curious about what he had to say about that Thorolund fellow for some reason.


He's seen many-a-shit.​

Chainmail Man: "You two still here? ...Well, whatever is it that you still need, hmm?"

Chosen Undead: "...Know anything about Petrus of Thorolund?"

Chainmail Man: "That rotund mushroom-head? Yes, I know of him. What of it?"

Chosen Undead: "...Just curious."

Chainmail Man: "Wonderful, another inquisitive soul... But, since you seem to want my opinion, I'll give it you... I wouldn't trust that man as far as I could roll him and I could roll him quite far."

Oscar: "Why not?"

Chainmail Man: "He had a companion. Another rotund-fellow, Clive, used to come over and annoy me with his chatter, said that he and Petrus were waiting for the rest of their little group to arrive... But I haven't seen that man as of late; not that I care, mind you... So a bit of riddle: why would a waiting-man suddenly disappear without a trace, hmm?"

Oscar: "...You suspect foul-play."

Chainmail Man: "The foulest from a man who claims piety. But, so long as he doesn't come near me, I don't care what that crook does with his freedom."


A Wandering Soul: "We should be advancing the quest very soon and heading into the Undead Burg. So pick wisely! Because you likely won't be coming back to the Firelink Shrine until a Bell Of Awakening has been rung!"


Do you have anything left to do here in Firelink Shrine?


[ ] Yes
-[ ] What thing...?

[ ] None - To the Undead Burg!
 
[X] Punch the Chainmail dude in the dick, until he agrees to help you two out. Yay for bullying!
 
[X] Punch the rotund dude in the dick, until he... I dunno, why would we stop again?
 
[X] Use the power the threat of a Dick Punch gives you to force this Petrus fellow to cast a healing miracle on the mute Firekeeper.
 
[X] Punch the rotund dude in the dick, until he... I dunno, why would we stop again?
 
Oh come on, thats just excessive. We don't even know that he pffffffffhahaahahahahahahahahahaha

[X] Punch the rotund dude in the dick, until he... I dunno, why would we stop again?
 
Playing Dark Souls lead me to believe that it is a game about learning. A game that harshly punishes the player with death, again and again, until the player learns to perform up to expectation, through repetition. A game of perseverance.

Apparently, it's a game about punching dicks.
 
Shintouyu said:
Chainmail Man: "Wonderful, another inquisitive soul... But, since you seem to want my opinion, I'll give it you... I wouldn't trust that man as far as I could roll him and I could roll him quite far."
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
Sooooooo, we should trust him an unspecified amount between a whole lot and bugger all? :V

[X] 'Nuff fucking around. Let's head to the undead burg.
 
Votes Locked:
##### 3.19
[X] Punch the Chainmail dude in the dick, until he agrees to help you two out. Yay for bullying!
No. of votes: 1
Vanathor

[X] Punch the rotund dude in the dick, until he... I dunno, why would we stop again?
No. of votes: 3
Nanimani, Bondo, Bladestar123

[X] Use the power the threat of a Dick Punch gives you to force this Petrus fellow to cast a healing miracle on the mute Firekeeper.
No. of votes: 1
NeverDies

[X] 'Nuff fucking around. Let's head to the undead burg.
No. of votes: 3
Skewfiend, Cornix Argentus, Tonaris


Well, it's technically a tie, but it's also technically 4 Votes for dick-punching Petrus, so... :V
 
[X] Punch the rotund dude in the dick, until he... I dunno, why would we stop again?
​

​

You strolled up to Petrus and started punching him in the groin.

Petrus: "Oh! Y-You what are you doing?!"

Punch. Punch. Punch. Punch. Punch.

It became a game of shove-and-punch.

Punch. Punch. Punch. Punch. Punch.

Petrus: "Oh, Knight of Astora, stop this madman!"

Oscar pulled you away.

Oscar: "Friend, restrain yourself. We cannot convict this man based on mere speculation."

Petrus: "Oh my! What have I done for this outrageous act to befall me?"

Oscar: "...We heard that your companion, a Sir Clive, had unfortunately disappear."

Petrus: "I see, I am under suspicions of wrong-doing. Who did you hear this from?"

Oscar: "The man by the bonfire."

Petrus: "...Oh yes, that Crestfallen Warrior who lazes about..." Petrus cleared his throat. "Do not trust that scoundrel's word or you'll end-up like Clive."

Oscar: "...Like Clive, you say?"

Petrus: "My companion Clive had often to went chat with that scoundrel... That scoundrel, you know, he's been here for quite the longest. It seems that he's always giving 'tips' and 'advices' to the people who pass through here. No doubt, that scoundrel's poisonous words have led many-a-men to their deaths! ...But I'm afraid that I might not stand a chance against such a scoundrel, so I have yet to drive him away... Ah, perhaps it was the fortune of the Way Of White that has led you two to me... Yes... If you would be so kind, the three of us together could safely force that man to retreat."


Side with...

[ ] Petrus - Drive away the Crestfallen Warrior.

[ ] Crestfallen Warrior - Petrus is a crook!
-[ ] However, Oscar doesn't seem to convinced, anything you can do to prove otherwise?

[ ] Neither - That's enough shenanigans. Time for the Undead Burg.

[ ] Dick Punch Simulator - The Punches Never End.

[ ] Write-In - What do?
 
[X] Have Petrus cast a Healing Miracle on the maimed Firekeeper as proof he doesn't deserve crotch punches.
 
[X] Have Petrus cast a Healing Miracle on the maimed Firekeeper as proof he doesn't deserve crotch punches.
 
[X] Have Petrus cast a Healing Miracle on the maimed Firekeeper as proof he doesn't deserve crotch punches.
 
You must login or register to reply here.
Remove ads
Back
Top