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Belated Battleships (KanColle) [REHOST]

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I always thought pregnancy tests had either 1 line or 2 to signify pregnancy, not 'boat.'
I had to pause my Dragon Quest 8 3ds to reread that line, I hope you're hap with yourself.
 
Sir_Gaea said:
I always thought pregnancy tests had either 1 line or 2 to signify pregnancy, not 'boat.'
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It's sort of like how TheJMPer informed us that if you try to run a tape measure around Jersey's hips to get measurements for tailoring purposes, the tape measure reads "108 feet." Doesn't matter if the tape measure isn't that long to begin with, it just does. Because an Iowa-class has a beam of 108 feet, so that's what you get.

Pregnant, or not? The answer is 'dess.'
 
@theJMPer the threadmark for the chapter just says "Im"

Considering it's "Implying Implications" on SB, I'm assuming that's a mistake
 
Simon_Jester said:
It's sort of like how TheJMPer informed us that if you try to run a tape measure around Jersey's hips to get measurements for tailoring purposes, the tape measure reads "108 feet." Doesn't matter if the tape measure isn't that long to begin with, it just does. Because an Iowa-class has a beam of 108 feet, so that's what you get.

Pregnant, or not? The answer is 'dess.'
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Burning Baron said:
No, the answer is 'boat.' Have you not been paying attention? :p
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Sir_Braazmiir said:
Dess only applies to Kongō's pregnancy. All other shipgirls are probably either "boat" or "not boat" wherein boat means pregnant.
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In this thread, we learn that "dess" is the universal shipgirl-ese ur-language word for "boat." :D
 
theJMPer said:
"Jersey?"

"Whattup?"

Arizona glanced at her sister for an instant. Pennsy was positively smoldering, and her gaze kept flicking back to the cratered slagpile that'd once been China. Arizona wasn't sure if her sister was enraged by the destruction, or just mad that she'd been shown-upped. "Might I ask you for advice."

The massive fast battleship blinked. "Fucking why?"

"Because," Arizona struggled to keep an even face at the big Iowa's confusion. "Because I value your opinion."

Jersey's ego swelled until it threatened to burst the already-snug fabric of her tight-fitting vest. If it wasn't for the heavy steel reinforcement riding under her bust, it probably would have. "Heh," she giggled, "Shoot."

"I…" Arizona stopped to gather her words. "How should I deal with someone… with whom I can't relate." She cut herself of just before adding "anymore."

But if Jersey knew who she was talking about, she didn't show it. "Ari, you're a fucking battleship. A fucking standard battleship."

"Yes?" Arizona gave her a look. "and?"

"You… we… fucking…" Jersey sighed. "Battleships don't fucking back down. Ever. You find what's right, and you plunk your over-armored ass down on it and fucking dare everyone else to move you."

"Right," Arizona nodded. It was the answer she'd expected—more or less. She didn't consider her derriere to be over-anything. She had exactly the right level of plump in her aft, thank you very much. Unfortunately, it didn't exactly bode well when the subject of her query was another, equally stubborn battleship.

"And get some pie," added Jersey.

"Pardon?"

"Pie." Jersey waved her hands in a circle. "Get some pie in her fucking belly. Literally fucking no one can be that mad with a belly full of apple pie."

Arizona smiled. She wouldn't have thought of that. But she did happen to know of a certain Admiral's daughter who loved to bake. "Of course. Thank you, commander."
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Cut back on the donuts Arizona!

theJMPer said:
The moment Sarah Gale stepped into the base mess, she noticed something very strange. Vestal was staring at her.

At first, she thought it'd just been a coincidence. The old repair ship looked even more dead on her feet than usual, and since the only motion her wiry body exhibited was the gentle curl of smoke coming from her pipe, Gale had assumed she'd just fallen asleep with her eyes open. Or at least as open as they ever got.

It was a little weird, but Gale had woken up the other morning to find a fire base emplaced on her tummy. She'd seen Wash walk around with neither a bra nor the slightest hit of back pain, which should not be possible with a main battery like that. An exhausted shipgirl sleeping with her eyes half-open didn't even register.

But when Gale started loading up her tray—with a nice chicken salad this time. She'd murdered her waistline enough at her mother's—the repair ship's eyes followed. Gale never actually saw them move, of course. But every time she looked in Vestal's direction the repairship's lidded stare was focused squarely on her.

Gale tried to brush it off as nothing. But she felt Vestal's stare boring into the back of her head as she helped herself to a few cucumber slices and some orange juice. When she turned around, she realized Vestal wasn't staring at her.

Not quite.

She was staring at her belly.

Gale grumbled under her breath. She was perfectly aware that the trim and tone she'd been working so hard on had vanished under the unyielding might of her mother's southern-fried hospitality. So what, she wasn't fat, her fatigues were just fitting a bit snugger than they had been. She'd work it all off, just like she had before.

The sailor couldn't help but scowl as she walked over to the repair ship's table. If Vestal was going to… insinuate things with that wordless stare of hers, Gale was going to mount a defense of her own!

She refused to let herself go now that she'd won the love of the most beautiful woman to ever sail the seven seas. And she resented the unspoken implication that she was turning into a land going whale.

"Well?" Gale glared at Vestal and slammed her tray down with a huff.

Vestal's eyes lazily rolled up to meet Gale's and she let a single puff slip from her pipe.

"I was at my parents, alright!" said Gale.

Vestal shrugged.

"Over the holidays." Gale sat and took defiant bite of her breakfast. "Over Christmas."

"Mmm," Vestal couldn't have looked more bored if she tried. But she was back to staring at Gale's waist.

"It's perfectly normal to gain a little over the holidays!" Gale brandished her fork menacingly. "I'm not fat! This'll all work off."

"Never thought you were fat," Vestal glanced up at Gale. Then she winked.

"I…" Gale felt her train of thought derail in a most cinematic manner. "Then… what… why are you staring at my belly?"

Vestal just stared at the sailor and rolled her eyes.

Gale was confused for a moment. Then in a moment of horrified realization, she put the pieces together. "No," she said. "No no… this… I'm just fat. It's fat. I'm… we're…"

Vestal pointed to the sliced cucumber on Gale's plate. "Cravings?"

"No!" Gale grabbed her tray and cradled it protectively against her chest. "I eat this for breakfast every day!"

Vestal's response was an unconvinced smirk.

"I'm not pregnant!" thundered Gale.

The mess fell silent, and every head slowly pivoted to look at the brilliantly blushing sailor.

Vestal's smirk widened, and Gale sank low in her chair and tried to hide her crimson face in her blouse. "I hate you."

"Hmm," Vestal fished a notebook from her battered welding jacket and ticked a box. "That'd be the mood swings."

Gale took the angriest bite of chicken salad ever witnessed by mankind. Vestal just smirked.
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Vestal's enjoying herself a bit too much!! :D
 
Now suddenly why Wash's faeries had set up a fire base on Gale makes a whole lotta sense. :grin:
Though if Wash's pregnancy test result means what I think it means, then we have a new problem: How will they deal with the inevitable hole left behind now that they're down one battleship?
 
landcollector said:
Don't worry Ari, after you kick some ass in this operation you can have allll the donuts you want.
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Arizona: I suddenly find myself even more motivated than before.
Harry Leferts said:
You know... I wonder how Arizona would react to donut butter? As in, a spread made from donuts that you can out on cookies, crackers and the like...
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Jane: Ari-mama looks funny.
Hiei: What do you mean?
Jane: Her eyes are all blank and she has a funny smile on her face.
 
theJMPer said:
"Um…" Wash turned the test over. Inside the little window was a stylized drawing of a boat. "It says I'm a boat."
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That's one advanced pregnancy test!

And boy, Gale and Wash hooked up literally as Gale was about to head out on Christmas Leave. They've just gotten back. If Gale and/or Wash is pregnant, they moved fast. It's only been 2 weeks!
...Gale, get officially hitched to Washington pronto, so any kidlings/little botes are legally both of yours.
 
Abject Testament said:
Now suddenly why Wash's faeries had set up a fire base on Gale makes a whole lotta sense. :grin:
Though if Wash's pregnancy test result means what I think it means, then we have a new problem: How will they deal with the inevitable hole left behind now that they're down one battleship?
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Nah. It was a boat, not a dockyard. She's not pregnant.

Yet.
 
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