[X] One of the mountains in the Devil's Spine nearby has a large, deep cave in it. Bulma can take shelter in there while you and Goku guard the cave's mouth, beating back the bandits.
Getting there and stashing Bulma and the car in the cave is the work of only a few minutes. Luckily the cave has a few curves in it, so Bulma's able to hide where there's no risk of stray bullets; unless they start chucking bombs into the cave, she should be safe. The bandits, realizing that you've spotted them but thinking they've got you where they want you anyway, take their time closing in as you and Goku stand watch over the cave.
Each of you stands to one side of the cave mouth, arms crossed as you wait for their approach.
"Goku, when they approach, they'll likely bring their most powerful weapons to bear first. Your staff and cloud mean that you're the best suited to taking them out. I'll cover you while you do that, and when you're done, we'll protect this cave together."
"Got it!" Goku says, drawing the Nyoi-Bo and summoning the Flying Nimbus as the bandits make their way toward you.
More than a hundred bandits are bearing down on you and Goku, wielding weapons of all shapes and sizes, driving all manner of modified vehicles from what look like glorified go-karts to monster trucks and what you think might be a genuine military APC. All of the vehicles have some level of armor plates and spikes welded to them somewhere; many of the larger ones have at least one gun mounted on them; the APC is armed with what appears to be an actual working homemade mortar.
One hundred bandits equipped with pistols, shotguns and assault rifles, driving armor-plated vehicles mounted with even more guns, and the only ones standing in their way are you and Goku.
"Goku?"
"Yeah, Jin?"
"You've been a good student. I just thought you should know."
"Thanks!"
It's at that moment that your estimation for your chances of success grows greatly, as the vehicles start to break.
It happens in various ways: some of them literally start to fall apart at the seams, others simply stall out, more than one seems to spontaneously catch fire as the bandits frantically bail out, and the engine of one of the monster trucks actually explodes.
As you wonder what on Earth is going on, you hear the sound of a rocket whizzing by and striking the APC, turning the mortar mounted on it into a piece of twisted wreckage and causing some damage to the vehicle itself.
Turning in the direction it came from, you see a teenage boy about Bulma's age sitting in an open-top car discarding a smoking rocket launcher.
"Hey! You should attack now, while they're distracted!" he calls out to you and Goku.
"Who are you!?" you yell.
"I'm here to help! Why don't we figure out the rest later!?" the teenager calls back. Not waiting for your response, he puts his car in drive and charges into the bandits, pulling out a sword and slashing the tires of any vehicle that's still operational.
"Goku! Let's go!" you say, rushing to join the fray.
"Okay!"
---
Honestly, the fight was actually pretty boring after that. Deprived of their vehicles and best weapons, terrified and confused as to what had happened, the bandits dissolved into mass panic, rout and surrender just a few minutes in, after you, Goku and the stranger had already taken out about two thirds of them.
You don't want to be followed again, but killing dozens of people helpless to stop you really doesn't sound like your idea of a good time, so you decide to just strip them of their weapons (and break them all just to make sure), rip strips of cloth and leather from their clothes and tie them up with it. You'll dump them in the caves so they'll have shade from the sun, and they can chew through the bindings eventually. After all, their clothes are pretty ratty; shouldn't take more than a day for most of them to work their way free, which is all the time you need.
"So who are you?" you ask as you, he and Goku all take up the time-consuming task of tying up the ninety or so bandits that weren't able to flee. "And how did you do that to their vehicles?"
"Well, that last part was easy. They were so busy keeping their eyes on you, I was able to spend all last night rigging a lot of their vehicles," the mystery teen says. "Couldn't get all of them, of course, but it was enough to cause a panic.
"As for who I am…" he says, turning to face you. "My name is Yamcha. I was of the Wolf Fang clan of desert nomads that roamed this land."
"You mean you were a bandit," you retort, your stance guarded.
"I won't apologize for what my people were. But we had honor; we always left those we accosted enough supplies to make their way out of the desert, and directions to do so. If they were unfit to travel, we would escort them to the borders. We did what we had to do to survive, and we took only what lives we had to. We weren't like these jackals," he spits, gesturing at an unconscious bandit at your feet, "Roving around plundering and murdering any human being they can get their hands on, bragging about how many people they've killed as though it makes them some kind of warrior."
"You keep speaking of them in the past tense," you note. "So either they don't have whatever vestige of honor you claim for them anymore, or…"
"Or is right," Yamcha says with a bitter expression. "Two years ago, a man came to these deserts, a cruel and powerful man. He approached the chief of the Blood Drinkers and murdered him and his entire family line in front of the entire clan, declaring himself their new leader and leaving them too terrified to do anything but accept. He did the same thing to clan after clan – the Black Buzzards, the Desert Children, the Devil's Bastards – growing his power, speaking of the glory of conquest, of emerging from the desert as a conquering horde to rape and sack and pillage from the 'soft greenlanders' outside."
"And he did the same to the Wolf Fangs?" you guess.
"He tried. But the Wolf Fangs were real warriors, and refused to be cowed, refused to bow to him. So instead he slaughtered the entire clan, man, woman and child alike. I only survived because I was out hunting with my friend Puar.
When I found out what had happened, I threw myself into training for two grueling years, hoping to gain enough strength to kill the man who slaughtered my clan, and get revenge. One week ago, I finally felt ready. I strode into his fortress and declared my intent, and I challenged him in front of all his followers to a fight to the death."
His gaze drops to the cast his arm is in. "I think you can guess what happened next. I barely escaped with my life. If Puar hadn't managed to save me, I'd have been just another corpse left outside to rot and show everyone what happens when you challenge the 'Desert Lion.'"
"And that's why you helped us," you realize. "You want us to help you get revenge."
"That's right," Yamcha says solemnly. "On my own, I wasn't able to beat him. But you and your friend are just as strong as I am, maybe even stronger! Together, we might stand a chance!"
Yamcha bows his head low, falling to his hands and knees. "Please! If not for me, or the people he's killed, then at least for the people who will suffer when his war begins! I heard the bandits talking while I was sabotaging their vehicles; they plan to start their invasion within the week!"
"What!?" you cry out. "But that's insane! My father would never stand for it! He and the Dragon Warriors would hunt them down and tear them all to pieces if they did that!"
"Your father!?" Yamcha says, raising his eyes in mixed fear and awe. "You're the son of the Dragon King!?"
"Yamcha! Yamcha! I finished checking out the area, and we're all clear! There's no bandits on their way as reinforcements!" yells what appears to be a small, blue, flying cat.
"What-"
"Hey, you two! You're the ones who told me I gotta tie these guys up, so the least you could do is help out!" Goku yells, annoyed that he's the only one still working.
"Goku-"
"Hey, guys! The shooting's all gone, and I don't hear any bandits! Did you win!?" Bulma yells, poking her head out of the cave. "Oh wow, you guys wrecked them! I knew you could do it!"
"Bulma-"
Bulma runs towards you and Goku, making it halfway before she notices Yamcha. "Oh wow, who's he? He's pretty, I mean…" Bulma says as she comes to a stop, blushing and smiling as she looks at Yamcha out of the corner of her eye.
"I-"
"Grrlbkwmen," Yamcha chokes out as his eyes roll back in his head and he falls backward unconscious.
"Oh no, Yamcha!" the little flying cat screams as it flies toward the fallen bandit.
"Yamcha? That's a pretty cool na – Wait what am I thinking about at a time like this, is he hurt!?" Bulma yells, rushing towards Yamcha.
"… Jin, what's going on?" Goku asks as the two of you watch over Bulma and the cat going into hysterics over the unconscious bandit's body.
"Goku, for once I'm almost as lost as you are," you reply.
---
It takes a while, but you manage to get Bulma and the cat (who is apparently the friend named Puar that Yamcha mentioned) to calm down, check Yamcha's condition (injured but stable; nothing that should have knocked him out. You give him a dose of Ki Healing just to be safe), and finish tying up and throwing all the bandits in the cave (though you ran out of room after getting sixty in there and stuck the rest under some depressions in the rock).
Now the five of you (Yamcha now awake, but still flushed red and sweating, trying desperately not to make eye contact with Bulma for some reason) as Yamcha tells you the same story he told you earlier.
"And the worst part is that getting back to my father would be a ten day journey," you say as he finishes. "If they really do move within the week, they'll probably have begun their raids before we even reach my father, and that's not counting the time it'll take for him to marshal his warriors and make it there to fight them."
"So if we do this, we have to do it alone," Yamcha says.
"Is he really that strong?" Goku asks.
"Yes. He's not the fastest opponent I've fought, or the smartest, but he's cunning and he's skilled. And his strength… In terms of brute force, I don't think any of us could match him," Yamcha says, a haunted look in his eyes as he grips his arm, now healing much more quickly thanks to you. "My fight with him was over the moment I let him grab me. The bones of my arm were crushed just from a light squeeze."
"You called him the Desert Lion before. Is that his name?" It seems odd to you that someone so fearsome has been in the area for over two years and you've never heard of him.
"No, it's a title he goes by. His name is Raion."
That… sounds familiar to you, but you just can't place it.
"Well don't worry, Yamcha! We'll help you beat this jerk up!" Goku stands up and declares. "My grandpa always taught me that anyone who uses their strength to pick on other people needs to be put in his place!"
"I've been taught something similar," you remark. "It is the duty of a true martial artist to put a stop to those who would abuse their power and harm the innocent."
"Well, I'm not gonna fight this guy, but if you need my help, I'm definitely in!" Bulma says, moving to sit next to Yamcha. "We're in your corner all the way, Yamcha."
Yamcha, apparently overcome with emotion, starts shaking like a leaf and buries his head in his hands. "Tha-tha-that's g-g-great, you g-guys," he stutters.
"While we're on the subject, Yamcha," you say. "This Raion, does he by chance hoard treasures and items of value?" You have a theory as to where the Dragon Ball may be.
"Huh? Oh, y-yeah. H-he's got it all piled up in a b-big heap in his arena for everyone to see," Yamcha says, head still in his hands.
"Have you ever seen it? Particularly, do you know if he has an orange sphere with red stars on it?"
Yamcha raises his head from his hands, a puzzled look on his face. "An orange sphere with red stars? Why do you want to know about that?"
"Because it's what we came here looking for. Have you seen it?"
Intuition - 2 (1.5) vs. Wit (5) – Failure!
"… Yeah, now that you mention it, I think I saw something like that. Honestly, I wasn't really paying much attention at the time, but I think it was in that pile," Yamcha says.
"Then even if he hadn't planned to invade the lands outside this desert, we would have needed to fight this Raion anyway," you conclude, nodding your head.
"S-So why do you want it, anyway?" Yamcha asks.
You aren't really comfortable telling someone you've just met about your reasons for looking for the Dragon Balls (for obvious reasons), and are about to tell Yamcha so.
Goku, unfortunately, has no such problems. "Because they're the Dragon Balls! They're scattered all over the world, and if you get all seven of them, a giant dragon pops out and grants you any one wish!" he yells exuberantly.
"A wish? Any wish you want?" Yamcha asks, the flush gone from his face.
"… Supposedly. It's just a legend, though. Why? Is there something you want to wish for?" you ask carefully.
Intuition - 2 (1.5) vs. Wit (5) – Failure!
"Not really, to be honest," Yamcha says. "Besides killing Raion with my own bare hands, there really isn't anything I need or want that I'd have to go through the trouble of collecting a bunch of magic jewels and summoning a dragon to get. And I don't really have the time to scour the world to make that wish."
You nod at his logic; he makes a good point. You kind of feel the same way, though you suppose you might think of something later.
Yamcha will need another day of your Ki Healing to fully recover from his wounds, leaving you all with a day to make and prepare a plan.
Yamcha is a good source of information. Raion is holed up in an old abandoned fortress that he's remade into a coliseum, hosting blood sports to amuse himself and his followers, often forcing captives to fight each other or wild animals to the death, and sometimes stepping in himself to brutally execute those who displease him.
The coliseum (which he calls Lion's Pride) always has about a thousand bandits inhabiting it at any one time, the population in flux as bandits leave and return from raids and other business. There are a lot of anti-air and anti-ground defenses, always kept manned. A direct assault probably isn't the best idea.
And yet despite that, you could just walk in with ease. Raion is so confident of his strength that he's left a standing invitation for anyone to challenge him to a fight to the death at any time in his coliseum. Of course, after the first few were horribly dismembered, nobody until Yamcha dared to try, but even now anyone claiming they're here to challenge Raion, whether alone or as a team, is allowed in without question.
According to Yamcha, Raion only has a following due to the fear and awe his power conjures up, as well as his promises of wealth and easy plunder. If you can beat – or even better, kill – him, his followers will disperse and life in the Diablo Desert will become much like it always has been.
Not that it was anything pleasant before, but one problem at a time.
So, what plan do you eventually decide on?
[ ] Challenge Raion to a 3-vs-1
[ ] Screw it, assault the coliseum!
[ ] Hold on, let's be smart about this
-[ ] Write-In alternate plan
