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Puella Magi - Memento Mori (PMMM quest)

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Tamiko will probably realize it only when Kishi confesses to her.

[x] I... sort of have something personal to tell, something I found out recently. You probably noticed that I tend to be... invisible, to others. That is, they don't notice me at all. The reason for that is... someone, for some reason, put a spell on me, making it in such a way that people will not notice me... It was only when I made my wish, when I became a magical girl, that I was able to fight back against that curse, to finally find friends once more...
 
[x] Serious time. Explain the curse calmly and to the best of your ability. Don't leave anything out.
 
[X] UbeOne
DrZiztah said:
'Heh, I know. It's actually why I'm contacting you so quickly after class,' you explain, 'Can you come to the school roof on top of my classroom's wing as soon as possible? There's something… important I must tell you. Evelyn and I will wait for you.'

'I-I will be there immediately!' Kishi declares, though you can't help noticing the obviously concerned edge in her voice.
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I don't think Kishi will in any way think we're confessing to her here, given that we told her Evelyn would be there with us.
 
[x] Serious time. Explain the curse calmly and to the best of your ability. Don't leave anything out.

I don't want to hear any confession from Kishi until the other two on equal level. Got to raise support with Ariane and Evelyn!
 
Wow... My mind went into some rather dark and depressing places with this vote. I admit I had to step away from the computer a few times just to calm down. :(


[x] "Kishi, sorry... I know this is coming out of the blue. Something happened in class today and it scared Evelyn a bit. I need to explain what happened because 'what' happened. For me, that's not unusual.
[x] "Maybe you've noticed, or not. I don't know. Outside of our circle, I don't really talk to anyone. Haven't. My uncle noticed that too. And last night, he advised me to start talking to my class mates again, maybe make some new friends."
[x] "I needed Evelyn's help. I don't know if I could've even done it on my own. Evelyn introduced me to another girl in our class and well...

[x] Ask Evelyn to tell Kishi what happened. What she saw, while you both talked to Hana.

[x] When finished:
-[x] "Evelyn, what you saw with Hana, the exact same thing happened when I first talked to you. You were just like her. If I didn't talk to you that first day, you wouldn't have seen me. You wouldn't have noticed me. It would be as if I wasn't even there."
-[x] "I didn't know, for the longest time- That's how it's like for everyone else... Has been for years... If not for my wish I- "

[x] "I have a curse. I've had it for years and didn't even know it was a curse until Uncle and Miss Cathy showed it to me just a few days ago."
-[x] Evelyn, Kishi you can see me, you can hear me, you notice me. You're exempt. But my classmates? Almost everyone else? They don't see me. They don't talk to me. They don't notice me. They can't. And I didn't know it.
-[x] It's not hopeless. The curse isn't unbeatable. You two can see me right? So can Ariane and Mariko and My Uncle and Miss Cathy. And now Hana too. She should be able to see me now. It's not hopeless. I can fight back now. I will fight it. I'm not giving up.
 
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... I think I'll wait for QM reactions. That seems like... it's less running through a minefield, and more rolling around on the ground in one.
 
Always Late said:
... I think I'll wait for QM reactions. That seems like... it's less running through a minefield, and more rolling around on the ground in one.
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I don't see the point in sugar coating this one. This is going to be a hard talk. Was always going to be one, unless the intent was to mislead our friends into thinking Tamiko's situation isn't nearly as bad as it is.
 
Muramasa said:
I don't see the point in sugar coating this one. This is going to be a hard talk. Was always going to be one, unless the intent was to mislead our friends into thinking Tamiko's situation isn't nearly as bad as it is.
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It being a difficult subject is all the more reason to be tactful and choose what is said and how its said very carefully. That's not misleading, that's common sense.
 
Always Late said:
It being a difficult subject is all the more reason to be tactful and choose what is said and how its said very carefully. That's not misleading, that's common sense.
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You think I wasn't trying to be tactful? I've only been writing, reading and rereading this vote for the last two and a half hours or so. If I didn't feel it needed to be said, it wouldn't be in the vote.
 
Muramasa said:
You think I wasn't trying to be tactful? I've only been writing, reading and rereading this vote for the last two and a half hours or so. If I didn't feel it needed to be said, it wouldn't be in the vote.
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I don't doubt your sincerity, intent, and effort. But the product, I feel still needs some tuning.

Muramasa said:
[x] "I-I was scared. Would you believe Evelyn knows more about my class mates than I do? We've been in the same class for years and I couldn't even tell you their names."
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Muramasa said:
But Evelyn helped me, even though what I asked for was odd. And Evelyn introduced me to another girl in my class. Or at least she tried."
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These two remarks are unnecessary. They're distractions from the thesis of the issue. Removing these and just having:
[Y] "Maybe you've noticed, or not. I don't know. Outside of our circle, I don't really talk to anyone. Haven't. My uncle noticed that too. And last night, he advised me to start talking to my class mates again, maybe make some new friends."
[Y] "I needed Evelyn's help. I don't know if I could've even done it on my own."
communicates the entirety of the setup.
Muramasa said:
-[x] "Evelyn, what you saw with Hana, the exact same thing happened when I first talked to you. You were just like her. If I didn't talk to you that first day, you wouldn't have seen me. You wouldn't have noticed me. It would be as if I wasn't even there."
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Muramasa said:
-[x] "I didn't know, for the longest time- That's how it's like for everyone else... Has been for years... If not for my wish I- Evelyn, Kishi you can see me, you can hear me, you notice me. You're 'exempt' from the curse that was placed on me. But my classmates? Almost everyone else? They don't see me. They don't talk to me. They don't notice me. They can't.
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These, on the other hand, each need something added. For the top part, this is what will hit Evelyn the hardest as it's confirming her fears and suspicions, and then some. This is where blunting the blow and being comforting is needed. I'm afraid I don't have an example to offer, but something to end it on a positive, hopeful note would help. Maybe something along the lines of 'the important thing is that you're my friends, and this curse can be beaten'? That should make the two go from despairing to inspired. The second one quote I think just needs a mention of how long we think it's been on us, and how long we knew of the curse. Especially that second one, because they will ask why they weren't told.

Am I making sense here?
 
Made some edits, according to Always Late's critique.

[x] "Kishi, sorry... I know this is coming out of the blue. Something happened in class today and it scared Evelyn a bit. I need to explain what happened because 'what' happened. For me, that's not unusual.
[x] "Maybe you've noticed, or not. I don't know. Outside of our circle, I don't really talk to anyone. Haven't. My uncle noticed that too. And last night, he advised me to start talking to my class mates again, maybe make some new friends."
[x] "I needed Evelyn's help. I don't know if I could've even done it on my own. Evelyn introduced me to another girl in our class and well...

[x] Ask Evelyn to tell Kishi what happened. What she saw, while you both talked to Hana.

[x] When finished:
-[x] "Evelyn, what you saw with Hana, the exact same thing happened when I first talked to you. You were just like her. If I didn't talk to you that first day, you wouldn't have seen me. You wouldn't have noticed me. It would be as if I wasn't even there."
-[x] "I didn't know, for the longest time- That's how it's like for everyone else... Has been for years... If not for my wish I- "

[x] "I have a curse. I've had it for years and didn't even know it was a curse until Uncle and Miss Cathy showed it to me just a few days ago."
-[x] Evelyn, Kishi you can see me, you can hear me, you notice me. You're exempt. But my classmates? Almost everyone else? They don't see me. They don't talk to me. They don't notice me. They can't. And I didn't know it.
-[x] It's not hopeless. The curse isn't unbeatable. You two can see me right? So can Ariane and Mariko and My Uncle and Miss Cathy. And now Hana too. She should be able to see me now. It's not hopeless. I can fight back now. I will fight it. I'm not giving up.
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Honestly that last line feels like something to be said after they react. So basically, the following update.
 
[X] Muramasa

And yeah, don't worry, the shouting earlier was me joking about.

Seriously though, there's oblivious, and then there's Tamiko.
 
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