This honestly sounds like a conversation from one of Terry Pratchett's Discworld books.
Harry Potter and the Skittering Spouse
- Thread starter Fencer
- Start date
- Crossover Fantasy Superhero
- Status
- Location
- Painting, Peach's Castle
Ah yes, Rowling's blatant attempt at justifying the threat against Sirius's life without bringing up the then-recently outlawed Death Penalty is gone.
Was always kinda stupid. She tried to work them in later but... Never really worked.
Was always kinda stupid. She tried to work them in later but... Never really worked.
Death_Sheep
Cat Owned
- Location
- Wisconsin
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Put them in a sealed box and drop it in the Challenger Deep; they won't be coming back from that any time soon.
Windborne
Devourer of Stories
- Location
- Oregon
Oh that was an amazing chapter @Fencer, and I'm glad Taylor and Harry started showing a bit of their hand in order to be taken seriously. Moody was spot on as well so props on getting his character.
As always I hope we see more sooner rather than later, but I realize I'm very much a greedy and gluttonous reader so I'm very biased. Harry's likely to start really appreciating Taylor very soon if he hasn't already, having positive reinforcement from someone as seemingly self confident as Taylor is going to do wonders for him. Of course we as readers know she's just as insecure as him, but she really doesn't give off those vibes most of the time even with her breakdown a few chapters ago.
As always I hope we see more sooner rather than later, but I realize I'm very much a greedy and gluttonous reader so I'm very biased. Harry's likely to start really appreciating Taylor very soon if he hasn't already, having positive reinforcement from someone as seemingly self confident as Taylor is going to do wonders for him. Of course we as readers know she's just as insecure as him, but she really doesn't give off those vibes most of the time even with her breakdown a few chapters ago.
Neruz
Rogue Spiderbanana
- Location
- The Land of Fire and Poison
Pretty much. Their long-term presence in Azkaban means they don't have any significant corrosive effect on their environment, or the environment can be bewitched against any such effect, so just conjuring a stone and metal box around them and tossing it into the ocean should get you at least a few thousand years before there is a chance for any of them to get out.
Alternately you can punt the box into space and then it doesn't even matter if any get out because by the time they do they'll be long gone from Earth with no way back.
(Though the idea that ten thousand years from now people in the future discover a swarm of Dementors sloooowly floating through space back towards Earth is kind of hilarious now that I think about it.)
The real question remains..
How do they know the Magical Seals work against Water Pressure of that depth?
Neruz
Rogue Spiderbanana
- Location
- The Land of Fire and Poison
Who said anything about magical seals? Just seal the box physically.
Hell, just conjure the box as a solid seamless object around the Dementor in the first place; conjured objects are real and do not disappear over time, so while conjuring that much stone\metal might not be easy, it would work just fine.
And how do they know it'll not break once reaching down the sea?
Do they just steal a submarine and Mind Charm muggles to bring it to the botton of the Ocean unscheduled?
While the Dementors may be killed by Heavy Water Pressure..the question would be how the Operation would be handled: By Purebloods who sends wizards down there by only magic to see that it's done, a Muggleborn using Submarines to reach there to make sure it works, or attatching it to an anvil and hope it lands to the sea floor?
Ace Dreamer
Verified Reality User
- Location
- Between The Unknown & The Known
Also, do you care if the box leaks, and the Dementors get a bit wet? As long as there's no holes big enough for them to escape through, and the box isn't deteriorating, no problem?
Neruz
Rogue Spiderbanana
- Location
- The Land of Fire and Poison
As long as there is no air inside the box, or there's a small hole for air to escape and water to get in, and the box is made out of stone and metal, it shouldn't have any issue with water pressure.
If physical trauma was capable of killing Dementors, then they wouldn't be so notoriously unkillable.
The only reason to toss them into the ocean is because it makes it harder for someone like Voldemort to set them free, nothing more.
I personally found this section, specifically these sentences were the worst, didn't sound like Taylor at all. It sounds more like a military badass Taylor and not a Warlord Taylor. I'm not sure how you'd re-word this section without making it sound worse. Enjoyed the chapter but this one section definitely distracted me.
- Location
- Madison Wisconsin
Dumbles: "I must keep the knowledge of the Horcrux a secret at all costs! It's dark and evil magic that endangers the world just by people knowing its possible!"
Mrs. Potter: "You senile fuck, every muggle with a DnD book knows what a Litch is! You're not protecting shit by pretending its some kind of memetic hazard that's corruptive to even speak about!"
Mrs. Potter: "You senile fuck, every muggle with a DnD book knows what a Litch is! You're not protecting shit by pretending its some kind of memetic hazard that's corruptive to even speak about!"
Ace Dreamer
Verified Reality User
- Location
- Between The Unknown & The Known
The obvious answer is to ban ducks. Or, possibly, eggs.
His death is hidden in a needle, that is hidden inside an egg, the egg is in a duck, the duck is in a hare, the hare is in a chest, the chest is buried or chained up on a far island.
M. H. Fuzzball
Aperture Science-certified Horrible Person
- Location
- Sector 2814
Comparing Voldemort to Koschei the Deathless is a mortal insult to Koschei.
Ace Dreamer
Verified Reality User
- Location
- Between The Unknown & The Known
People wandering around, mumbling about Egyptian phylacteries, and DnD liches, may be neglecting that the 'separate soul'/'external heart' trick for immortality exists in a number of cultures...
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It's called Gunpowder.
Yep, Gunpowder was originally used to create an elixir for immortality.
At least we know the true reason why Voldemort is Serpantine than back his normal self.
Not to mention using Lead being used to also expand life and hopefully reach immortality.
- Location
- Russia
What, because he tried to snort some gunpowder and blew his nose off?
The Story in a few chapters (Established Time stamp at 13.36):
View: https://youtu.be/LNrY_IM2T8Q?si=x4PVJOTxhnn9NoIQ&t=816
A Victory Snort at the Potters's Home, of course.
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You've never seen that because your example is not great, because Napoleon wouldn't have any reason to have a magical vault, being obviously a muggle. I don't know who 'Marshals' is in the context of historical figures. But if they're famous enough their lineages would be tracked, and if they're muggles obviously they don't have vaults. And why would Harry be the closest living magical relative? You'd have to go out of your way to contrive a whole load of crap when you'd need less work to just use a bunch of OC families that died out or whatever, but if you're going to do that you should just have them be folded into the Potter vault anyways.
Hypothetically there's not anything wrong with Harry having random older vaults, which is why people often use Peverell Vaults (No good writer should use Hogwarts Founder vaults in Gringotts instead of Hogwarts itself, since the Founders are older than Gringott's founding and thus wouldn't be capable of having vaults there) or some other thing like saying Harry older used his trust vault instead of the main Potter vault.
Dementors can fly. They're not really trapped in Azkaban, as demonstrated when Voldemort shows up and is like 'you guys are lame, get with the program' and they follow him out. Your idea that Dementors can't cross water is dumb, and unsupported by... anything. Do you not remember them showing up in Year 3's Quidditch match from the clouds?
Neruz
Rogue Spiderbanana
- Location
- The Land of Fire and Poison
Nope.
That's entirely a movie invention, and I have no idea why the people doing the movie decided to make Dementors fly, but it is not canon.
In the books, Dementors glide, however they only ever glide a couple of feet above the ground and are never seen going higher. Furthermore when Harry finds himself facing off against the swarm with the Black Lake between them, the Dementors go around the lake, not over it, indicating that they cannot glide over bodies of water, only over land.
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I'm just saying they haven't done Napoleon/The Bonaparte Family or even Alexander The Great.
What books/scrolls would they even contain that'd be an addition to the "Potter Library > Hogwarts Library" Trope? The Secrets to the Library of Alexandria?
There was the other match in third year, against Hufflepuff, where Cedric won because Dementors invaded and cause Harry to fall.
The one where Draco and his guys pretended to be dementors was another match
The Odds were never in my Favour had Alexandra (fem!Harry) be a descendent of Alex the Pretty Alright, and Mordred and Morgana
Neruz
Rogue Spiderbanana
- Location
- The Land of Fire and Poison
Oh right, wrong chapter, my bad.
Here's the scene from the book, emphasis mine:
Prisoner of Azkaban: Chapter 9 said:
No flying, the Dementors are just standing on the pitch staring up at Harry.
e: The movies made a lot of creative changes for various purposes, usually to make things look more dramatic on screen.
Dementors in particular were changed a lot; in the books they are just humanoid figures in long black cloaks that glide along the ground and are surrounded by a cold mist and an aura of despair. In the movies they're skeletal undead monsters that fly and actively freeze the world around them, causing ice to visibly grow on everything.
Presumably the movie makers felt that "humanoids in long black cloaks that are always surrounded by mist" was insufficiently spooky.
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Fencer
Writer
- Location
- 2nd shift
- Pronouns
- He/Him
On the harry crazy ancestry debate. Make him a distant descendant of Attila the Hun. This is both plausible and for which he wins, no prizes, because he has way to many descendants.
More seriously I've always thought it was a stupid trope and overly contrived. You could just as easily say that the Potters are descended from one of king Arther's knights not named in song and story. Interesting, gives a reason for a more martial family tradition, lacks the numerous flaws in claiming distant ancestry to someone of greater historical significance. A more elegant plot point for a more civilized story.
More seriously I've always thought it was a stupid trope and overly contrived. You could just as easily say that the Potters are descended from one of king Arther's knights not named in song and story. Interesting, gives a reason for a more martial family tradition, lacks the numerous flaws in claiming distant ancestry to someone of greater historical significance. A more elegant plot point for a more civilized story.
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