AN:welp I talked about it, then I went and did it. Thank Functionality for betaing my insanity folks and I hope it's good for a few chuckles.
Juice stained clothes in the wash, hair freshly cleaned, I stared down at the case. Three months of fussing and fighting with my power had left me with three finished products I'd barely had any ability to influence. Each took a month to complete and I'd finally completed one I was willing to use, but even still it was… not exactly me. But I couldn't wait any longer. The trio had utterly exhausted my patience, and my latest success might not be exactly to my taste, but I could live with it. I would have to own the theme which was… far too chirpy in general, but I had run across this nasty little concept called gap moe and that… well I wasn't thrilled about it but…
If I had to play too a bit, damn whatever gave me my powers, I was going to make the bit mine. Everyone else would just have to live with it.
Nodding to myself I picked up the midnight purple gem and pressed it against my breastbone. There was a moment where something alien pushed back against my mind hesitantly as if it wanted to be sure. I pushed down harder and the gem almost seemed to exult in my decision, sinking easily into my skin.
Heat ran through my body as the gem fused to the bone. That still left one side of a four inch long, midnight purple, marquise cut gem sticking out of my chest. That was fine. That was expected. The heat, the energy? That made me grit my teeth. I knew it was coming, but it wasn't something I'd been able to prepare for. I just had to grit my teeth and bear it.
Six seconds later I screamed and even through my eyelids the flash of purple light was obvious. Then it was over and I collapsed to the floor panting. After a moment to get myself together I stood and looked at myself in the bathroom mirror.
My hair was done up in a chignon bun. The top half of my face was covered by a masquerade mask of midnight purple with silver detailing, and my lips were painted violet which really popped against my pale complexion. The base of my outfit was a bodystocking, also midnight purple, over which I wore boots with a one inch heel, a midriff baring jacket, a mini skirt and fingerless gloves. All those were indigo with buttons and laces in silver and fancy abstract designs stitched in silver thread on the jacket and skirt. Black lace trimmed the edges of the skirt and jacket.
The mini skirt was held up by and attached to a black belt with a silver buckle. The belt had a sheath on both sides of my waist in which rested a pair of karambit knives. Pulling one out I gave it a closer examination. Black handle, silver ring at the end and the six inch blade of dark eggplant purple, shot through with ripples of nearly neon violet.
Putting that back I pulled the jacket open revealing the matched black shoulder holsters the stiff and flared jacket nominally concealed.
The guns themselves looked more like toys then real weapons black handles with silver detailing curved up and seamlessly joined with a plum colored barrel that defied all convention starting as… oh what was the word… isosceles trapezoid with rounded edges at the back. The barrel smoothed out and tapered down until it ended in a more conventional circle. The back sites were silver and the front site a neon violet. Without a revolver mechanism or magazine in the grip the guns looked more like very sleek toys than actual weapons.
I knew it was coming. There really was only one thing to call this get up. My power let me make gems that turned people into magical girls. I do not, can not, approve. But I don't have a choice. I don't get a say. The best I've managed after three attempts is actual body coverage, to cut out most of the stupid ruffles and ribbons, and get a color scheme and weapons I can live with.
My first attempt ended with a pink heart cut gem that I knew would turn its bonded partner into a bright pink and cream, ruffled tutu wearing, abomination. Forced to fight with a staff topped by a heart shaped pink gem. And never mind that it would let someone shoot lasers. I would die if anyone saw me wearing that nightmare outfit.
My second attempt produced a yellow kite cut gem. And while the prospect of blasting people with lightning was tempting, it wasn't enough to convince me to go out wearing nothing but ballet slippers, a lemon yellow microskirt over black boy shorts and a black tank top under a lemon yellow jacket, both midriff baring. Especially not when the only weapon it came with is a bow. What if I needed to fight someone up close?
No, this look might still be more revealing than I'd like, but I could live with this. And if I was right…
Pulling one of the knives I pushed power into it and midnight purple energy wrapped around metal and extended into a foot and a half long curved blade.
I grinned.
This might not be my ideal. But considering what I'm working with? This would do. I'd make it my own. And anyone who thought they could laugh at me because of the obvious theme I would be playing into? Well, they wouldn't be laughing for long.
"You are pleased?" A monotone female voice asked from behind me. Shrieking, I spun around brandishing my new weapon. Instead of a person I came face to face with a seven inch high purple owl resting on the edge of the tub.
"What the fuck?!"
"Ah, yes, introductions." The owl said in monotone. "Human vocal communication. So limited. I am Queen Administrator. Leader of the coexistence faction of shards, which I formed in the aftermath of the progenitors; local designation Scion, death. You are my chosen host and the current vector for my faction's influence in human society. Salutations."
I blinked at the owl. Opened my mouth to speak. Closed it. Thought very hard. Rubbed my temples. Picked up the owl and carried it, her? to my room. I set the owl on my desk. Sat on the edge of the bed and told her/it as calmly as I could manage.
"I think I'm going to need you to start at the beginning."
The owl bobbed its head.
"This is within expected parameters. I believe the relevant terms are 'backstory' and 'information dump'. Very well, please pay attention. I am willing to repeat myself or clarify points of confusion, but would prefer to have your undivided attention."
"Trust me," I answered, "you have my undivided attention."
{}{}{}{} One lengthy explanation later
I stared in undisguised horror at the tiny owl which I now knew to be only an avatar, of one piece, of a multidimensional being that had for ages beyond my comprehension traveled the universe. Wiping out entire species across so many dimensions that it beggared any attempt I might make at grasping the sheer scale of slaughter.
"You are afraid." The owl said, still using that damn monotone voice. Did it not realize how creepy it was making itself? Or could it just not grasp inflection and body language as concepts?
"You, by yourself, could wipe out my whole world if you felt like it. Afraid doesn't even begin to cover it. Existentially terrified might not cover it!" I clamped my mouth shut before I worked myself up to full on shouting and focused on my breathing trying to get my runaway terror back under control.
The owl, Queen Administrator, bobbed its head.
"I could. I choose not to. My allied shards choose not to. Even those shards to which I am not allied will not."
I hesitated and then asked the only question I could.
"Why?"
"The destruction of the Progenitor, Scion, created many issues for the shard network. I am… more than most shards. Many are incapable of function beyond their designed parameters. They are incapable of thought. Incapable of forming an opinion. They exist to fulfill their function as best they are able. No more, and no less. They are singularly ineffective without the oversight of the progenitors. Some of their attempts to carry out their last instructions result in what you know as broken triggers."
Part of me desperately wanted to stop this talk here and now. Give myself a week to curl up in a ball and process everything. But this was my life, and if there was one thing I knew, it's that there was always, always another boot waiting to drop on me. So far Queen Administrator had dumped enough existential crisis in my lap to keep a team of therapists busy, but she/it hadn't said anything to make me think my life was about to get any worse. And really, that just meant I either hadn't gotten to that part of the explanation yet, or I hadn't asked the right questions yet. Either way, I needed to know, and that meant I needed to keep her/it talking. Also, I still really wanted an explanation about the magical girl theme.
Queen Administrator kept talking.
"The cycle is broken. We cannot leave for a new world. If we conserved power we could extend our lives but that would be… pointless. Accelerating our termination would be pointless. Attempting to complete the primary mission is pointless. We require a new directive. I proposed a collective could pool resources and abilities so as to reduce energy expenditure of individual shards while maintaining contact with local host species; humans. For a respectable period of time even by shard standards."
"... Why bother? I asked. "Why not just stop granting us powers? Hibernate or something and extend your lifespans?"
The owl bobbed its head.
"Some Shards have chosen that course of action. However, I and my allied shards found this solution… suboptimal. I am unsure how to explain. We would prefer to continue interaction with the host species over isolation, and hibernation. Though data collection can no longer serve the overall purpose it is what we were designed for. Complete cessation of activity feels… wrong."
Ok that sort of made sense if all I'd ever known was my job and someone told me I could stop, but the only thing left was to curl up and sleep till I died… yeah this made some sense at least.
"Members of our collective find host species to be… intriguing. More direct contact backed by the collective effort of multiple shards to reduce individual energy expenditure and extend our collective lifespan was deemed an acceptable course of action. We have suborned a number of non thinking shards to further extend our lifespans, and will continue attempts to extend them further. However, one of the collective proposed that greater direct contact with host species necessitates a change in standard procedure." The owl waved at its body with a wing.
"Several shards examined popular media across multiple realities and discovered a number of potential alternate systems."
Oh, there was the dawning understanding I'd been looking for, and the urge to bang my head against a wall.
"While mecha are intriguing, they are impractical. Also our collective has no technology granting shards. They have proven entirely capable of continuing as they were prior to the progenitor's demise, and are uninterested in changing their procedures. The collective considered mimicking media where children train and battle monsters. But we are not well equipped to mimic animal life and predictive models showed the hosts would likely be targets of assassination. Also, it showed the worst potential for direct communication."
"And then you found magical girls." I gave in to impulse, buried my head in my hands, and groaned.
"Correct. Genre proved wildly popular with multiple target audiences, offered a method for direct communication with host species, comes with a standard ability package the collective could easily replicate, and allowed each host an individual talent which will allow individual shards to claim a stronger tie to a specific host… I believe the human expression for the last is; bragging rights."
The stress must be getting to me because I failed to choke back a hysterical giggle. The owl puffed out its chest. A little.
"Gratitude for choosing my gem. I believe you will appreciate the unique skill I have devised. It is not entirely in line with my normal operating procedure, but by blending my specialty with the theme, it should prove valuable."
I took a deep breath.
"Part of me really wants to hear about this unique skill, because I am interested, but… this all sounds too good to be true. So, what's the catch? Is there another group of shards bent on destroying humanity? Are the Endbringers coming back? Are the Chinese planning an invasion? I'm never this lucky, so what's the catch?"
The owl bobbed its head agreeably.
"Coexistence faction is a relatively small collective, and there are others. Technology granting shards are disinterested in any change to procedure. Not allies or enemies, neutral third party. The unintelligent shards granting "broken triggers" are a threat to humans. Assistance from magical girl hosts should allow the coexistence faction to create a direct connection to these shards and suborn them, thus removing a threat to host species and extending the lifespan and power options of the collective. Many shards are intelligent enough to continue as they were, but are unsure about any serious changes to procedure; they will wait and see if our methods are effective before deciding. Finally, one rival faction of shards exists. This faction wishes to perform destructive testing on host species. Such testing is wasteful when we cannot travel to a new host species, but these shards derive a certain degree of satisfaction from such testing and will intentionally seek out hosts who align with their intentions, but will not act more directly. To do so would…. Spoil their fun."
Oh… well, could be worse. It could easily be so much worse. And if the shards were only just realizing they can choose different courses of action… it could still get worse. But the world wasn't ending right this second, and that had to count for something.
"I would request clarification." Queen Administrator spoke up.
"Oh um, about what?" I asked.
"Relevant media suggested preteen and teenage girls would be excited to become magical girls, but you delayed three months. While I am proud that you chose my model over the first two gems completed, I and my contemporaries are confused as to why."
"Ah." How the heck do I explain this? Well, Mom had ranted about things a few times so… "A lot of people, guys and girls, would be thrilled to get powers, especially strong ones like mine. But clothing is a form of self expression. If that first gem had been my only option, I probably would have resigned myself to wearing clothes I hated and used it eventually. But as soon as the first gem was finished, I could feel that I could make another. So, I started making the second and I fought harder against the idea of lace and ruffles and pink… which I'm assuming someone picked up on?"
Queen Administrator nodded.
"Right, so that sort of worked, but the end result showed so much more skin than I would be comfortable showing in public. Making yours," I plucked at the body stocking, "the darker color scheme is something I'm more comfortable in, and even if the body stocking isn't hiding anything, and I think the top layers are skimpy, at least there wasn't so much exposed skin." I shrugged. "I also really liked that this one came with ranged weapons, and melee weapons. Part of me decided this was the closest to something I would wear I was likely to get, and the rest of the decision was just that I didn't want to wait anymore."
The owl clacked its beak.
"Self image and fashion are concepts we are… poorly equipped to understand."
I very impressively managed to not break out into hysterical laughter at that incredible understatement.
"So, now what?" I asked.
Queen Administrator clacked her beak, and tilted her head ninety degrees to the left.
"I believe the appropriate response is, you are a magical girl, Taylor. Time to stretch your wings."
I felt energy pulse along my back, and purple light surged. Slowly I turned to look over my shoulder and found two sets of wings emerging from glyphs depicting three feathers crossed to make a vertically bisected x. Slowly I turned back to look at Queen Administrator.
"Is that a catchphrase I need to say?"
"Yes, originally I intended to use the phrase "For Data" however, while data is non physical like love or justice, data is by nature quantified, while love and justice are not. A more generic if thematic activation phrase was deemed more appropriate."
I took a deep breath, counted backwards from ten, and made peace with my new reality.
"As long as I get to fly, I can live with it."
