TBH I think if we can get him in contact with an adult we know have terrible taste in porn but is otherwise a decent person it'd probably help more.
Getting him to the point where he's willing to talk about his issues to a teenage girl is going to look incredibly sus.
I always saw Subaru as the most pathetic character, but Rudeus is honesty at Subaru's level or maybe greater. It's like Superman vs Goku of cringe.
I can imagine that part of the social worker's inner monologue is the constant worry that his son will end up just like Rudy.
[X] Don Juan
The least bad choice, and probably one that won't be touched until we evolve the persona.
You don't know much about isekai then. The bar grows ever increasingly lower to justify losers' persecution complexes. Subaru's a gem for a lot of reasons one of which is that his writer is never afraid to call out his shit to the point where he wrote six separate bad ends showing how he could have gone wrong.
You don't know much about isekai then. The bar grows ever increasingly lower to justify losers' persecution complexes. Subaru's a gem for a lot of reasons one of which is that his writer is never afraid to call out his shit to the point where he wrote six separate bad ends showing how he could have gone wrong.
Any story that wants to explore this darker side of humanity must be willing to explore how doing horrible things affects the world and people around you, or it risks trivializing the true horrors of the darkness it depicts.
Yeah the Greyrats were...very problematic, especially in the WN(the scene is a webnovel exclusive that may be retgone).
Context was that Rudy's father's mistress basically raised her daughter to go for Rudy, Rudy at that point refused his half-sister on the basis that it'd disappoint Slyphy(first wife, childhood friend) and also his father might actually beat him to death.
Thats improvement, because start of story Rudy might have gone for it anyway, as he has nobody whose opinion mattered to him in his life.
So she went for his son instead, and while he was upset about it he never did stop it, since he was always terrible at denying either of them anything.
So she went for his son instead, and while he was upset about it he never did stop it, since he was always terrible at denying either of them anything.
So much for having fire coverage not dependent on Nephren-Ka...
This is the first time we've had an opportunity for it in what, 6 or 8 Personas (fusions included) and we're passing it up for a physical attacker. When we know we can get a physical attacker from the Priest link.
Please tell me there's going to be another opportunity to get fire coverage soon, @afreaknamedpete.
So much for having fire coverage not dependent on Nephren-Ka...
This is the first time we've had an opportunity for it in what, 6 or 8 Personas (fusions included) and we're passing it up for a physical attacker. When we know we can get a physical attacker from the Priest link.
Please tell me there's going to be another opportunity to get fire coverage soon, @afreaknamedpete.
You don't know much about isekai then. The bar grows ever increasingly lower to justify losers' persecution complexes. Subaru's a gem for a lot of reasons one of which is that his writer is never afraid to call out his shit to the point where he wrote six separate bad ends showing how he could have gone wrong.
I have become a veritable scholar of isekai. I have absorbed the isekai zeitgeist deep into my very being.
Which is to say that I have strong thoughts about Mushoku Tensei. I dislike a lot of what actually happens beat by beat with the plot, but there's one key fact for me about Mushoku Tensei that makes it stand out to me.
It has themes. Legitimate, actual fucking themes. Perhaps this was not intentional or I'm reading too much into it, but there's enough meat in Mushoku Tensei's character writing that it can actually be analyzed. There's this repeating, overarching circumstance where the first impression of a character ends up being wrong or misinformed— and this is done in many different characters in many different ways.
You have the basic stuff like Ruijerd being ostracized for something not his fault. But you also have subversive stuff like Paul which bounces back and forth between good and bad. Orsted is not who he seems. Soldat is not who he seems. Fucking Zenoba is not who he seems. For 99% of the story Mushoku Tensei doesn't even have a villain.
Mushoku Tensei also does something that I only kind of realized from watching the anime (never actually read it but I used to follow the manga). They use the Pre-Isekai inner voice when Rudeus is being introspective. It's such an interesting directing decision— when Rudeus is at his worst or even contemplating suicide or acting emotional you almost never hear his inner voice. Only when he's being introspective do you actually get his inner voice and it's not Rudeus' voice, it's the pre-isekai voice, and it's always detached like a spectator viewing his own life. Which is to say that I believe Rudeus as a character. I see why he does the things he does and the thread of logic that leads him to be what he is. I can watch and unironically be invested in an entire anime season about his erectile dysfunction.
Like most people I have objections with the content. But Mushoku Tensei has ambition which I cannot help but respect. It has a message about second chances, people not being who they seem... I believe these characters have inner worlds and inner thoughts.
I just want to emphasize how fucking rare this is.
Like, take... I dunno. I Got a Cheat Skill in Another World and Became Unrivaled in the Real World, Too.
It's very pretty. The protagonist is a nice stand up dude, humble, respectful, not mean nor vindictive. He does absolutely nothing irredeemable or worthy of critique. If I met him in real life I wouldn't have any problems with him. He is a turkey sandwich with no cheese. I watched the show but I still had to google his name.
I would not enjoy Rudeus in real life. I do not believe he is a good person nor would I wish to spend time with him. But I'd 1000% prefer to watch a story about Rudeus' life than dude from Cheat Skill anime.
So much for having fire coverage not dependent on Nephren-Ka...
This is the first time we've had an opportunity for it in what, 6 or 8 Personas (fusions included) and we're passing it up for a physical attacker. When we know we can get a physical attacker from the Priest link.
Please tell me there's going to be another opportunity to get fire coverage soon, @afreaknamedpete.
One thing I want to do at long term is to figure out what is the whole thing about Archetypes. We have a few Personas we're close to unlocking it, but I still want to get what is the whole deal about it. We know using Personas with Real Deal makes us very aggressive narratively, but...honestly, I feel we don't really see how that works in practice very much. Maybe in battle?
One thing I want to do at long term is to figure out what is the whole thing about Archetypes. We have a few Personas we're close to unlocking it, but I still want to get what is the whole deal about it. We know using Personas with Real Deal makes us very aggressive narratively, but...honestly, I feel we don't really see how that works in practice very much. Maybe in battle?
In the isekai world there is a curse on green hair to be hated. Rudy as an isekai isn't affected so he treats Sylphy(who is collateral damage by happening to be green) and Rujerd(who is actually of the cursed demon race and involved in earning the curse) decently.
Mushoku Tensei is a complex world even if a lot of the characters are...problematic. But they are problematic in ways that are then elaborated upon, coped with or mitigated over time.
Finally caught up with this quest after a few weeks, and great work, OP. I'm not familiar with almost all of the non-Persona source material, so I've been looking a lot of stuff up as I go, but it's never actually been jarring--the references come more as easter-eggs than vital knowledge, you basically get the gist of the characters again, as you go, and the two I do know from Adam (Subaru and Monkey Girl) seem pretty much on the money. On the thematic side of the crossover, everything dovetails very nicely as well--you've done what Cheat Slayer couldn't and managed to critique the isekai genre without also doing all the dumb shit the isekai genre usually does!--and I enjoy the way you've literalised the metaphor of the genre being evolutions/copycats of SAO. Ultimately, though, I think the most impressive feat of authorship is both managing to manage this thread's inexplicable desire to work 4 part-time jobs, and managing to make said jobs blend properly into the narrative. Voters really are monkeys. but sometimes enough of them get to Shakespeare with some editing.
(Part of me wonders where the P5 cast have got to, here--obviously most predecessor Wild Cards tend to be kept off the board by the two players, but I can think of at least 2 contacts who have pretty natural reasons to get involved with the brave new world of VR--but I recognise that the cast is stacked enough as it is.)
The endgame should be very interesting, given that 1) the technology is very much out there--even if SEEDs go down, Fluctlights are not going back in the box, especially with the general government tech rollout we're seeing--and would need drastic measures to reverse, 2) the government, who are our employers, are clearly up to something considering all the foreshadowing about the aformentioned digital rollout, and 3) we are, and I cannot stress this enough, working for the actual Satan the actual Devil, and the chances of him being our good pal forever are probably quite low--with the caveat that Philemon is worse for once. (Have developed a crack-theory here, but I think I'll sit on it for now.). I, for one, will very much enjoy the ride to wherever we end up.
Anyway, my votes:
[X] Ys
[X] Ximen Qing
Not a huge mechanics guy, so I'm picking the ones with the most thematic/character juice--Ys is literally a destroyed utopia that we can cause to crumble, and Ximen Qing's negative action effect seems the most amusing to read about.
Hmm, from what I recall... Yu worked as a daycare attendant, translator, tutor, janitor, and whatever that one job that had him folding all those paper cranes was.
Joker was a test subject, assistant at the gun store, florist, waiter, and convenience store clerk.
I think there might have been more, but those are the ones I can remember off of the top of my head.
Lieutenant Itami, undercover in his gaudy orange T-shirt, frowns at the insinuation. "Like I keep telling Kiks, I'm on vacation. Not on call for shady extralegal investigations."
When Kikuoka mentioned he had someone assigned to stake out the coin locker you presumed he'd put a police officer on the case. Not... this guy. "You should've skipped town while you had the chance."
"That's what I keep telling myself. But Kiks has a way with words. Plus, it comes with some perks." The grin he gives you immediately makes you want to hurl. "Boss is connected. He paying me with advance tickets to YUNA's live show. Front row seats! Dunno who he had to kill to get those tickets, but I ain't looking a gift horse in the mouth!"
You are still entirely unsure why Shigemura-sensei's master plan involves the dissemination of his weird Vocaloid daughter to the mass media, outside of making him fabulously wealthy. Guess even genius scientists have bills to pay.
"Isn't YUNA the cutest? You know they're finally releasing the figures? It's full of the VR plastic they use in Gunpla, so when you wear your Augma she dances around your room! Isn't technology wonderful?"
"Can we get on with it?" Before your opinion of the JSDF falls any further than it already has. "You found out who was picking up the NerveGears? Was it a customer or a distributor?"
Itami goes quiet, his joviality fading. A moment later, he silently slides a stack of camera stills over to you.
You sift through the pictures to behold one of the blandest-looking human beings you've ever seen. A brown-haired young man, no older than a high school student, shoves a NerveGear into an oversized duffel bag. He's wearing a black hoodie over a green tracksuit— the entire ensemble making him stand out like a sore thumb in the sweltering heat of Tokyo's rainy season.
"I don't suppose you recognize him?"
Lieutenant Itami shrugs, "Never seen him before. But I know the type— reminds me of the old Kaneshiro scams from a few years back. My guess is he's a middleman, or more likely a victim."
"Doesn't change the fact that he's my only real lead."
You check your smartphone and the Lockpick app you heard about from the handyman. With any luck the mark will have an electronic lock. You pocket your phone and head for the building.
"Hey, uh, you're not going to commit a crime, are you?" Itami calls, raising his eyebrows. "I'm not sure if Kiks is going to get you out of an arrest..."
"If you're so worried why don't you help me?"
"Eheheh, I'm officially off duty, you know? I'm not even police so I'll get in a boatload of trouble if I get caught snooping around like this, though I can't just let a crime happen in front of me..."
"Then go enjoy your vacation elsewhere, so you don't have to see what's about to happen." You growl through clenched teeth, storming off as briskly as you can towards the apartment building. To his credit the Lieutenant decides not to follow, slinking off to go buy anime figures or whatever he does when he's not being the world's least enthusiastic investigative assistant.
The apartment complex is, if anything, even shabbier than yours. There's a tinge of green and brown to the walls, and a dying plant dangles from a cracked window. The overhead lights flicker with each step you take and half the rooms look abandoned. The whole place feels like it's some gang hideout, the only thing missing was a delinquent with a cigarette.
"Hey! Anyone home?"
No answer. The apartment's door is locked tight— and you see no keyhole, exactly as expected. You open the app, and it's relatively straightforward to follow the commands. Hit the link for the address here, and connect to the locking system, while confirming that no living creatures are nearby...
Beep.
The door opens, and now you've become a real-life criminal. You thought there'd be more fanfare.
"Hello?" You call, softly. Still no answer. You take two steps in, close the door behind you, and quickly shine the flashlight on your smartphone around.
The apartment is more spacious than you expected. There's a computer screen with a trashy anime wallpaper on the main table in what you assume to be the bedroom, and figures of various cute girls lining the shelves— all of whom you don't recognize. The space is shockingly neat and well-maintained, and the sheer volume of the electronics must've cost a fortune. Whoever this person was it seems they lived in relative comfort.
There's an entirely unused kitchen— you weren't going in the bathroom even if Death Gun was hiding there— and then when you step into the storage closet you feel your heart skip out of your chest. Jackpot.
A NerveGear, loosely tossed in a pile in the corner of a storage closet. It's dangling awkwardly on its side as if it were a piece of trash rather than a piece of highly valuable contraband. And when you get close you finally see why.
Because right underneath the NerveGear is... another one.
And another.
And a dozen more.
A makeshift dumping ground of over two dozen NerveGears.
You take a picture with your phone. This has gone beyond merely 'shady' and risen straight into conspiracy territory. You just chanced onto what you're beginning to suspect could be Death Gun's entire base of operations. The derpy guy in the tracksuit could be Johnny Black, could even be XaXa and you just waltzed straight into the tiger's den.
A dull thump, footfalls upon metal steps. Your heart starts beating a mile a minute.
The sound echoes— and intensifies. The footsteps are getting closer by the second. Whoever lives here is returning home, and you have every reason to believe he's a murderer. Running outside's too late, he'll have you trapped in the doorway. Time seems to freeze and you clutch the model gun you've snuck in under your clothes. It's going to be a bluff but it's your only chance of getting out of here alive.
"Door's unlocked again... fucking assholes..." You hear a muttering sound coming from the front entrance. A door creaks open, followed by heavy footfalls. Death Gun has returned home.
"SORA! You better not have made Shiro break in again!" It's the annoying drawl of a male voice, barely even older than you. "If you need snacks then just order out like a regular fucking person instead of stealing mine!"
You stay dead silent, hiding in the closet.
"Of course, they're already gone. Probably gonna need to buy more ice cream now, it's always the ice cream..."
You peek out of your hiding place. The boy in question has flopped down on his chair without the slightest care in the world— pulling a video game disc out of a case and setting it on the table. "Finally... Shangri-La Frontier...! Quota's finally done, nothing in between us anymore, hehehe...!"
Now that've you gotten a closer look, he doesn't exactly strike you as... mass murderer material. If anything you'd peg him more as a NEET than someone who gets off on death games. But they say never to judge a book by its cover.
"Now where's that stupid headset..."
Your heart sinks as he slowly, ponderously, walks closer to your precise hiding location. Your hand wraps around the grip of your model pistol, just in case. He's right outside of the closet. The footsteps halt.
"Hmm? That's weird, must've been the wind..."
Click. The doorknob turns. The closet door slides open.
Gold eyes meet green, and the boy blinks.
"Shiro, what the hell are you doing in there? Get out of my closet."
Your mouth goes dry. Your hands tighten around the grip and you feel your nerves surge through your arms— it's time to act. The model pistol in your hand whips out as you rise out of your hiding place.
"Huh, when'd you get so tall? Did you start stuffing your chest too? What the fuck is Sora doing now... wait..."
His eyes go wide. His jaw hangs slack open, as if he was gaping at a ghost. You take the last step forward— "Don't move!"— the gun sights perfectly leveled at his forehead.
You expect him to laugh in your face, seize you, run away, or even fight back. You need to distract him long enough to make a break for the door with your evidence intact. You rear back, ready to lunge for the exit—
And he collapses onto his back, mouth locked in a rictus of sheer terror, foam frothing from his lips as he writhes helplessly on the floor. You wait a second, then two. He doesn't move. You testily kick him with your foot and all you get is an errant twitch in response. He looks dead.
...
Did you just kill him?
The only answer you get to your question is the acrid smell of urine pooling on the floor.
SATURDAY - June 7th, 2025
Evening
"WHO DOES THAT? WHO FUCKING DOES THAT!? I COULD'VE DIED FROM SHOCK!"
This is your life now. The fruits of your criminal activity laid apparent for all to see. It's become embarrassingly clear that whoever this guy was— Death Gun he was not. If this bozo was Death Gun you'd have caught him in a day, tops.
Thankfully for your burgeoning criminal career, the boy in front of you was, in fact, not dead. You dumped a pail of ice water on him and after wailing like a baby for the better half of five minutes he finally realized he was soaked in urine and ice water, and ran to the bathroom to recover the final dredges of his dignity.
You, of course, took a picture beforehand. Just for some leverage.
Now in a fresh tracksuit, his early terror has been replaced with anger and righteous indignation. "Who the hell are you!? Are you a stalker!?" He pauses, hemming and hawing. "If you were a stalker it wouldn't be that bad..."
"I'm not a stalker!" you quickly correct him. " You're the one with NerveGears in your apartment— who the hell are you?"
"I'm Kazuma— gah, I mean, I'm nobody! An innocent bystander!"
"Alright Kazuma. You've got two dozen NerveGears locked in your apartment. Do you want to explain that?"
"Why should I explain anything to a burglar, huh? I'm not the one who pulled out a gun!" He jabs his finger towards your chest. "Breaking and entering. Attempted murder! I'll never be safe in my own home ever again, you've traumatized me!"
You gesture at the pile of NerveGears spilled on the floor with your model gun. "Look, it's only a plastic model! Who do you think is going to have an easier time explaining things to the police?" Technically neither of you were within the law here, but mass distribution of a death trap was certainly a degree higher than pulling a model gun out in justified self-defense.
The boy leans a bit closer, studying it in greater detail. His eyes widen when he realizes that you are not, in fact, an armed and dangerous killer.
"Oh? Oho... I see, I see..." Kazuma has the audacity to look smug as he folds his arms with satisfaction. "So... your gun's just a model huh? Well I hope you're prepared... threatening someone with a model gun's still very illegal..."
"And having a half dozen NerveGears isn't!?"
"Illegal? Hahaha, you're serious? Hmm, what's the phrase I'm looking for... Oh! I know!"
He leers, suddenly certain of his victory, and your blood runs cold.
"It's only a model."
What?
A pause. A long, cold, horrible pause, that seems to drag on forever. You don't want to give the idiot the satisfaction of your horror, but he's not acting like you've caught him in a compromising situation. Your instincts make no indication he's trying to trick you. You stare at the pile of NerveGears you've expended no small amount of effort tracking down.
Models? They were... all...
Fakes?
"Ah, sweet justice. Go on, call the police. You know what, maybe I'll call them too! They can take the headsets into evidence, and find that they're just Amuspheres in a shell... nothing illegal about that. Not like a fake gun..."
"Slow down, why do you have a pile of fake NerveGears—"
"Nuh-uh-uh, you're not the one who gets to ask the questions!" Kazuma has a great big stupid grin on his face as he folds his arms in a self-righteous manner. "Ohoho, it feels great to be on the side of the law! Hehehe, I won't call the cops, but you're gonna owe me a few favors..."
You suppress the urge to punch him right in his stupid face.
"First off, I expect an apology. Kowtow to me, right now. Grovel! Weep and cry for forgiveness. You are to address me solely as Kazuma-sama the great and magnificent!"
"Like hell, I—"
"Whaaa!? Refusal?" He lifts his finger as if giving a lecture. "After you broke into my room and almost killed me you have the nerve to defy my orders!?" He hugs himself and dramatically swoons, "Oh, I felt my soul leaving my body! Cut down— in the prime of my life! The tragedy, the pain, ahh, the horror... and she won't even apologize..."
You grit your teeth. If you apologize now this asshole's going to milk this for all it's worth. And yet he's somehow come out victorious over the two of you because for some asinine reason, he's collecting Fake NerveGears. "Don't be so dramatic. The only thing leaving your body was your piss—"
Wait. You... you still have it. One more card to play. A final weapon. More powerful even than the gun you have in your pocket. You pull your smartphone out of your hand and you flip the picture of a certain person towards Kazuma, whose smile freezes when he lays eyes on the contents.
"You wouldn't."
You don't fight the smile. In fact, you let it consume your face in wicked glee. "It's a flattering picture Kazuma-sama. Very dignified."
"Waitwaitwait, you can't do this!" Kazuma looks uncertain, afraid of the direction you're taking him. "You wouldn't do that! You're not that trash of a human being! B-besides, it's just a single picture! I have you caught in a real crime! You'll get a record! I-I'll sue you!"
You revel in this perfect moment. Perhaps this is what victory tastes like.
"Really? Guess that means I have nothing to lose. Hmm, I happen to know a streamer... maybe she's interested in some new material~♪"
Kazuma gapes at you like a goldfish. "No. NO! I won't be reverse blackmailed by a criminal! It's just a picture. That's all! Just a picture!"
"Uh huh. Time for your worldwide debut, Kazuma-sama..."
"STOP!" He's seconds away from lunging at your phone, but even he must know everything's already backed up to a cloud. You see every manner of emotion contort his expression, culminating in a downcast sigh. And Kazuma falls to his knees, drearily collapsing into the floor as if he were already dead. "No more. Please."
"I'm glad we could reach an accord! Now spill. What the hell are you doing with a bunch of fake NerveGears? And who the hell is running your operation?" There's no way in hell this clown's doing this alone.
Kazuma casts his head down like a dog with his tail between his legs, suddenly and very meek looking. "Look. Let's let bygones be bygones alright? What's a little breaking and entering between friends, eh? How about we all forget this happened? You delete the picture, I never saw you, you never saw these NerveGears... live and let live, you know?"
Yeah right, you're not stopping when you've gotten this far. "In case you haven't noticed, people are dying in GGO. And what do I find but your piss-soaked ass running around distributing fake NerveGears. Do you think I can just walk away without an explanation? So spill, who are you working for?"
He hesitates. His face goes pale. "You don't want to know. Trust me."
"God, it doesn't have to be that complicated. Just tell me what I need to know. Then we part ways. It's as simple as that."
"No, I mean it. You want to get the hell out of here before they realize you're here. You're a weird gun-toting closet stalker, but even you don't deserve them! If you dig any further you'll end up in a hell so deep and inescapable you'll wish you had killed me."
You roll your eyes. "I've heard it all. Your boss doesn't scare me, and you have more to worry about right now than them," You flip your phone around, finger hovering over the share button of Kazuma's compromising position. Your phone feels warmer than it did a second ago. "Now talk or I start posting."
Kazuma's face melts away. His eyes, now empty, lock onto yours. And for the first time, you see true fear etched in his features. "I'm sorry. It's too late."
As in lockstep with that ominous warning, phone in your hand suddenly becomes uncomfortably warm. And before you can react, an annoying ringtone blasts out of your own phone, some dumb anime song that you don't recognize. You... didn't set that ringtone...
Unconsciously, your thumb presses the accept button.
<Kuro I take it? You work fast.>
It's a taunting voice going through a synthesizer, being broadcast on speaker. Kazuma's lack of surprise only cements this voice as the identity of his boss. You look him in the eyes and Kazuma sighs in resignation. Your phone, it's completely shut down. All your files, your images, locked except for the taunting blank screen of the anonymous caller ID.
"Who is this?" You just lost all your leverage, yet Kazuma seems more forlorn than triumphant.
<I'm nobody. No, I'm more curious about who you are, Kuro.>
"Who is Kuro?" you grit out. No way you're going to confirm it, this bastard's not getting any satisfaction out of you.
<No need to play coy. Who else could it be? There's only one person who's running around trying to ruin the fun.>
"Wait, you're Kuro!?" Kazuma's eyes suddenly bug out of his head. "Gah, should've been obvious. How many white-haired girls running around GGO? Man, do you know how rare your avatar is? If you were gonna do all this spy nonsense you should've sold it and rolled something less conspicuous!"
You stifle a groan. This whole situation's gone pear-shaped.
<Hey Kuzuma? Bring out some refreshments for your new co-worker. Oh, love the new pic! Very flattering! Gonna set that as my wallpaper for a few months...>
Kazuma gives you a grim stare. He hands you a soda from a mini fridge like a warden delivering an inmate's final meal. You wave him off and focus your attention on the stranger who just hacked your cellphone. "So who the hell are you supposed to be? Death Gun?"
<Hahaha, is that what you think? C'mon, you're not giving yourself enough credit! You know who I am.>
Do you? Someone deep enough in GGO to recognize you who's not explicitly part of Death Gun. A person running around with their own conspiracy of fake NerveGears. Nothing about it makes sense to you, who benefits from mass distribution like this? Knowing what you know about Incarnation, couldn't a fake NerveGear be just as effective as the real deal? It might not fry brains but putting people's minds into comas strikes you as a distinct possibility...
<Cat got your tongue? Need a hint? Hmm, I expected more of the person who defeated me...>
"Thanks for that by the way! Made millions betting on you!" Kazuma says as he opens a bag of chips. His sheer nonchalance fills you with more anxiety than his open hostility ever did.
But you've been given enough hints.
"『 』. I thought you quit GGO."
<Oh, that was the plan. But then things got interesting, didn't they? So I have a proposition for you Kuro. Well... less of a proposition. If you refuse... I'll leave the consequences to your imagination.>
He has complete access to your phone, and likely evidence of your breaking and entering stunt. You know what he's threatening you with, and unlike Kazuma you have nothing on this guy and everything to lose.
"What do you want?"
<For things to be interesting, of course! What else is the point of a video game?>
Was『 』's objective simply a twisted interest in screwing around? Or was he as crazy as Death Gun, and saw no harm in putting human lives at risk? "How about the specifics? What do you want from me?"
<Then I take it you've accepted? Excellent. I'll be in touch shortly with the details. Try to relax and enjoy yourself in the meantime, Kuro. After all... there's no point in any of this if you're not having fun.>
And with that, the line disconnects. Leaving you with a jarring sense of unease.
Kazuma lounges around the spread of junk food around him, drinking a juice box and working his way through an entire sleeve of cookies. His attitude towards you has taken a complete 180, and he treats you with the casual friendliness of a cellmate on death row.
"Can I say lucky I am you broke into my room? Do you know how busy I've been? No time to game, and farming in GGO does not count. Ah, but with you here I can feel my worries melt away..."
This is the low point of your life. Being consoled by a jackass who you were blackmailing 5 minutes ago. "You're what,『 』's gopher? What's their deal?"
"You'll find out soon enough, no point in me spoiling the surprise. You know what Kuro? You strike me as a hard worker. Who else would go as far as breaking into my house? You should relax, and take a load off. You're probably gonna need it... haha."
You squint at him. "Is『 』blackmailing you too?"
"Blackmail? Eh. Nah. Once upon a time I had a great life— a blessed life making no trouble and minding my own business! But those horrible misers called my parents kicked me out! Their own flesh and blood! Ah, homelessness was a terrible affliction for a young man such as myself. Then I hear about an opportunity, to make money playing video games...! Turns out, it was a trap all along."
Lovely. Your second NEET in a row. At least this one managed to get a job.
"Kuro, as your senpai in『 』's «Alts» let me give you some advice. You're working too hard. Hard workers like you, society will exploit you into the ground! It's better to coast through life just like me!" Kazuma closes his eyes and nods, looking quite pleased with himself. "Working for 『 』's not that bad when you get down to it! At least you aren't lining some CEO's pockets!"
"Hey, don't knock earning money until—"
Kazuma keeps tsk'ing at you like you're a slow student who can't grasp the simplest concepts. "You've drunk the kool-aid, Kuro. It's sad to see you go this way. A real shame. Once you start making your job into your hobby, you've failed in life... brings a tear to my just thinking about it..."
He takes a big sip of his drink and levels you with his beady little eyes.
"I saw you run around all over the BoB like a chicken with its head cut off. You can say goodbye to that life— one good thing about working for『 』is the outcome is never in question.『 』always wins. And now you're on the winning side!"
You can't share in Kazuma's philosophy, especially since there's so much more on the line than just one grudge match in GGO. But your options were limited— you just barged into the middle of『 』's plan like a bull in a China shop, and now they've got evidence of you committing a crime.
Kazuma sips his juice like it's some fine vintage, eyes glimmering with that annoying smugness of his. You can tell he will try to bum off all the work at the earliest opportunity.
"Anyways Kuro, let's let bygones be bygones! We're stuck in this together. Try to make the most of it!" Kazuma says this while thrusting out a chip-dusted hand towards you— with the intention of a handshake.
Your day couldn't get any worse. So against your better judgment, you take his hand. What else can you do? Might as well face the storm you summoned. And you feel it even within this character— the SEED of a new world, more potential power, more...
I AM THOU, THOU ART I.
THE... STRANGER SEEKS TO... CONFOUND YOU? BEWARE THE KNAVE'S... LAZINESS..?
...
Fuck this. I got nothing.
This is your subconscious signing off. There's no depths to be plumbed here.
He's just an asshole.
TO GRANT YOU POWER TO DESTROY THE HEAVENS.
The power of a new Persona settles into your mind. The force of the collective unconscious made manifest presents itself in myriad ways, drawing upon myths both ancient and modern. Personas had strengths and weaknesses, yet each was uniquely powerful in its own right.
But these Personas...
Why...
Why were they so useless!?
SATURDAY - June 7th, 2025
Velvet Room
Oh? Contractor, it pleases me to see you once more. Please, do not be surprised. My Master appears indisposed. He is currently vomiting into your coffin. It appears this World does not sit well with his stomach.
No matter, for it is with great pride and humility that I have accepted this grave responsibility in his stead.
...
...
It's... hmmm... oh dear... There's really not much to work with here... Is this the shape of the KNAVE's ideal world?
He wishes to spend all his time playing video games.
He wishes to be rich and live in luxury.
He wishes to be surrounded by beautiful women.
And he shall find what he seeks— power, status, money.
He will even have the harem of his dreams... only... ...Why are they all idiots?
Chaos is truly unfathomable.
...
I apologize, Contractor. These options fill me with nothing but shame. But the power of the Persona reflects the inner world of the holder.
And so I am forced to conclude that the KANVE OF WANDS' world is a very silly place. Perhaps it is best for all of us that we never speak to him again.
[ ] The Lady of the Lake
Look, strange women lying on their backs in ponds handing out swords ...that's no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony. You can't expect to wield supreme executive power just 'cause some watery tart threw a sword at you! I mean, if I went around saying I was an Emperor because some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me, people would put me away!
-From Monty Python and the Holy Grail
STR: Rank A (5 Dice)
MAG: Rank A (5 Dice)
AGI: Rank C (3 Dice)
VIT: Rank C (3 Dice)
CHT: Rank A (5 Dice)
PASSIVE:
This Persona's Blessing on This Wonderful World!: This Persona becomes more useless as it ranks up and cannot evolve, but may provide a passive benefit at higher ranks. Archetype [Drunk Tart]: You are drunk and prone to poorly interpreting plans and objectives. Any write-in plan will be interpreted through the lens of an individual of below average intelligence under the influence of copious amounts of alcohol.
SKILLS:
Aquadyne: Generate an AQUEOUS element and increase its «Main Visualizer» render priority. Calls forth a very impressive water fountain, flashy party trick or other non-damaging manifestation of water. [MAG/BLUNT/HARMLESS]
Cast Sword: Chuck the divine mandate of kings in the direction of a random person in your line of sight. Can target friends, enemies, bystanders and yourself. [STR/SLASH]
Imbibe Holy Water: Take a swig of the good stuff! Will roll CHT to inflict the SLEEP status effect on yourself or allied party member. Restore [1 SP] in the process.
Wait, I have Diarahan!?: Completely restore a willing target's HP to maximum, but you may only use this skill once— and only after first using every other skill on this Persona's skill list. [CHT/HEAL]
[ ] St. Attila of Antioch
And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying, 'O Lord, bless this thy hand grenade, that with it thou mayst blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy.' And the Lord did grin. And the people did feast upon the lambs, and sloths, and carp, and anchovies, and orangutans, and breakfast cereals, and fruit bats, and large chulapas...
-From Monty Python and the Holy Grail
STR: Rank F (0 Dice)
MAG: Rank SS (7 Dice)
AGI: Rank F (0 Dice)
VIT: Rank F (0 Dice)
CHT: Rank F (0 Dice)
PASSIVE:
This Persona's Blessing on This Wonderful World!: This Persona becomes more useless as it ranks up and cannot evolve, but may provide a passive benefit at higher ranks. Archetype [Explosion]: Your only goal in life is to show up and explode. Any deviation from this goal in a write-in plan will be summarily ignored in favor of detonating, or setting up a detonation.
SKILLS:
Explodidyne: Generate a massive THERMAL element and increase its «Main Visualizer» render priority. It can only manifest in the form of a massive, all-consuming explosion. [MAG/FIRE]
Inferno of God: Your FIRE attacks pierce resistances and nullification. [PASSIVE]
Crimson Sublation: Spend [10 SP] to grant your attack ADVANTAGE. If you lack the SP/Determination to activate this, you cannot attack at all. [PASSIVE]
The Third Number: You must spend two scenes charging before attacking with this Persona and you are HELPLESS and unable to defend yourself the scene after using this Persona. [PASSIVE]
[ ] The Black Knight
The Black Knight always triumphs. Have at you!
...
All right, we'll call it a draw.
...
Running away eh? You yellow bastard, Come back here and take what's coming to you. I'll bite your legs off!
-From Monty Python and the Holy Grail
STR: Rank SS (7 Dice)
MAG: Rank F (0 Dice)
AGI: Rank F (0 Dice)
VIT: Rank SS (7 Dice)
CHT: Rank F (0 Dice)
Resist: Everything
Weak: None
PASSIVE:
This Persona's Blessing on This Wonderful World!: This Persona becomes more useless as it ranks up and cannot evolve, but may provide a passive benefit at higher ranks. Archetype [Crusader]: You will take on all the world's suffering and pain! Never give up, even when you're hobbling about on your stumps! Any plan that involves not becoming the enemy's punching bag will be ignored.
SKILLS:
0-Accuracy Vertical Arc: Slam down your blade in two cleaving blows, bisecting all in your very slow, heavily telegraphed path of destruction. All Successful Dice rolls are forcibly rerolled up to three times when this skill is used. [STR/SLASH/MELEE]
Have At Thee!: Cast off your armor and have a fair fight! Recovers [1 SP] at the cost of reducing your VIT by 5 points for the scene. Regain an additional [1 SP] for every 2 points of DMG you receive this Scene. [DEBUFF]
Shield Hero: You will automatically intercept all attacks, provided you are in range to intercept them. That means all attacks from all parties, against all other possible targets. [PASSIVE]
Flesh Wound: When taking damage, take +1 from all sources. If you would take 0 DMG from an attack, take 1 DMG instead, provided you are above 1 HP. [PASSIVE]
Fire Persona added by popular demand.
Vote for KNAVE Persona choice.
Next update all Persona choices are finalized but they all remain open.
Current tally:
Ys: 17
Kalunga: 7
Cokaygne: 1 (Yay!)
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