TreeQuest: Magitech (Riot Quest)

The wannabe lumber-thieves, dubbed "Lumburglars" by the Forest, marched south a day's journey, carefully staying well out of sight of the official path, despite the cost in travel-time and effort, to avoid any possible observation. They got up well before dawn, and came to the general vicinity of Newton Village in the midafternoon.

And the Forest answered… by not answering. By drawing up the strongest Empty Veil in its history, removing anything like tracks via Earth manipulation, and trying their dead-level best to prevent any of the intruders from finding them, the Forest did its utmost to simply avoid the looming confrontation altogether.

And at first, it was touch and go. The Lumburglars carefully scouted the area some miles away from Newton Village to the north and west - coming perilously close to the Forest itself at one point. Indeed, the Forest had to tell Marta Yarrow to duck down and stay low for over an hour.

They'd brought a small device to track continuous trails of Magic; the device seems a touch unreliable to the Forest, plus they don't appear to be more than passable at its use. With a little finagling, the Forest managed to disrupt the Magic traces that it was following, the few times it seemed likely to lead them in the right direction.

And the Lumburglars didn't, in practice, quite know what they were looking for. And the day drew on and night eventually fell - and then lack of sleep started to show. They attempted to continue scouting a circle around Newton Village, and thought they were on to something. Their device latched onto a trail, indeed, but it went the wrong way. Then the Forest realized: It's the trail of a Shadow-Spinner that passed through months ago, and they're following it straight to the main Shadow-Spinner nest!

During this time, while the Lumburglars had been at close range, the Forest had searched their minds - stealthily! - at some length. And seeing them likely to die if nobody intervened, the Forest reduced its mental stealth slightly, and acquired quite a bit more information, at the cost of several of them shaking off bouts of "why was I reminiscing about that? Ah, well - focus on the mission."

Most of your information, is summarized as follows:

• The Stealthy-gal has a limited ability to hide her thoughts from you, but it mostly broke down as they all got close.
  • "Hide her thoughts from you" - it seems like a general-purpose mind-block, and it seems to be part of her overall Stealth(?) element.
• Her plan for life is, in essence, to make a lot of money quickly then retire to the Larongo League.
• She's planning to do this by getting paid by anyone who will hire her - most specifically, she's currently being paid by the Woo Clan to cause problems locally (and this is part of that).
• She's also been approached by a shadowy unnamed organization that has "a fang crossed with an enchanted axe" as their symbol. They are offering payment for "whatever she learns" from this venture, but cash on delivery (of information). They seem interested in the enchanted lumber, and nothing else.
  • Naturally, this immediately drew the Forest's attention. She has a specific location to check for a note or contact. Expected passphrase "Balcony Direct" - which she thinks is probably just a standard nonsense phrase.
  • The contact she's talked with has always worn a concealing hooded cloak (with the logo attached), and has one of those voices that could be male or female. She hasn't followed them, though she was sorely tempted after the second meeting. She has been shown a bag of coins, so she's pretty sure they have the means to pay.
• Three of the others are mostly decent people, and have families that would miss them.
  • One of those really does need the money, due to a child with a rare hard-to-heal disease.
    • The Forest suspects this "disease" is really "I somehow ingested Voidshard Dust, and it stuck inside of me." The Lumburglar's plan is to buy a bunch of expensive powerful healing potions, and hope that they work at all - just enough to keep the boy stable on a journey to a certain Doctor Flinx, a theoretical expert in non-Magic Healing who lives far north in the Shining Concord Empire.
      • She is a PhD not really an MD - but if Magic won't work, well, Mundane Healing is her field of research…
  • One of those needs the money due to personal wastefulness, but might have learned his lesson.
  • One of those is bored (and despairing of purpose in life) to the point of taking a (low!) crime job just to pass the time. (This one is unwilling to do worse than theft.)
• One of the others is a rather terrible person, and has a family that might prefer he didn't come back. Brother and increasingly-unwell elderly mother, both of whom he has physically injured on many occasions. They live in Shieldhome.
• None of the others have (discernible) ties to conspiracies or other such things.
• Of the other two Mages, one signed up with the understanding that this was a "theft-only" job, and that he wasn't willing to be party to any harm done to a more-or-less innocent, and the other... would preferthings go that way but is quite a bit more jaded/ruthless.
  • The - nicer of the two, actually - has Ending (Journeyman) and some minors. He was in charge of, basically, walking forwards and hoping that the Wizard's hypothetical Magical defenses collapsed before he passed out.
    • Incidentally, in blatant defiance of narrative convention, his name is Gabriel despite him being neither particularly angelic nor demonic.
  • The less nice has Gravity, and was the party's planned means of getting "a large amount of Unusual Lumber a good distance away quickly" if it came down to it. They were hoping for more lucrative loot, but planning in case that fell through.

After some discussion, the Forest decided that they weren't necessarily comfortable sticking their necks out for wannabe-burglars, but they WOULD go ahead and plan an illusionary sign, glowing in its own light, describing the Lumburglars' peril:


The Forest considered putting in further effort to rescue them, and an argument would have ensued, save for what actually happened: The Lumburglars stopped, carefully checked their bearings, conferred about their location and directions, and decided to journey somewhat back towards the path to be safe.

They then made camp and waited out the night. In the morning, they checked their bearings again, and concluded with great certainty: They had been heading right towards a known (and extremely dangerous) Shadow-Spinner colony.

You caught a flicker of "well, this will make it impossible to rob him" from a few of the Lumburglars - but even those were also agreeing with the common opinion: "Thank goodness the Wizard was gracious enough to save us, his enemies - and let's make tracks out of here and never cause him(?) problems again."

The only dissenter from this opinion was Steve Robertson, the guy who was bored out of his mind, who instead insisted on hanging out for long enough to let everyone else get well on their way, then striding into Newton Village and saying, "Hello Newton Village! I'll happily work for cheap, for whoever can describe the way my life was saved - contingent on adventure, room, and board."

He also carried a few dozen days' wages as a "thank you so much for saving our lives" present, and a small set of notes. The notes contain several pages of musings that Gabriel, the Mage of Endings, was writing down about his Element - plus an appendex of sorts, containing a series of rapid scrawls that the Gravity Mage added on (to try to help out on the present).

(Note that, in several locations, the original author's name has been torn out from the corners of the pages. Not that it stops you from knowing, of course, but the Lumburglars didn't want to chance it.)

---

You have Connected to the Trees of Talanburg. The city is largely built on platforms on these massive Trees, and they pay close enough attention to their home that your presence is likely to be noticed sooner or later. A bit of careful looking around quickly shows the following additional information that might be relevant to your plans:

• They are very used to Magic, despite the fact that under half of the city can reliably wield it.
• Most are very fond of their home and of nature, though maybe a quarter are relatively indifferent.
• Their treasury is running low, due to the most recent few Mayors having spent profligately on the town and populace. Of course… who voted in the Mayors?
• They are aware that the Woo Clan is working to destabilize the region. In the last few years of elections, this has started becoming a major topic in political debates and rhetoric.
• A Vampire managed to break into the town, kill several guards and civilians, and run off before anyone could stop her, one to two decades ago. They hold a grudge - though less than they would have, as the Last Star fired mere hours later - and they're about 70% sure the Vampire died. They also have a greater-than-average appreciation for the Last Star, and would welcome further information on their heroes - if they believed you, I suppose.

---

A Mind made of Metal. Shining brightly, tempered and unyielding. Someone who would never quit halfway.

That is your first impression of Sara of Irn; well, Sara formerly of Irn, as her small village - marginally larger than Newton Village - had been driven from their homes just under a year ago. Not because they had done anything, but because they were in the Woo Clan's path, and the Clan wanted their stuff.

They had left when a small army showed up at their doorstep, and counted themselves lucky to keep whatever they could carry. Winter was upon them, but they had their lives - and a bit of food.

They found shelter in the first good spot they could, a small cave just east of the Battle Plains, and waited for a warm spell. Then, as quickly as they could, they moved across the Battle Plains, to the west and north. They stopped when they got to the river, and constructed basic shelter just ahead of oncoming storms.

They survived the winter by fishing - though it was touch and go more than once. But they slowly rebuilt and improved their shelters, and winter turned to spring. Spring turned to summer. Summer brought plenty - plenty to hunt and plenty to gather, and even success at the little farming they had been able to accomplish. They had few tools - and that was as grievous a loss as anything - but they persevered.

None of them lived in Irn because they loved civilization, and this was the life to them - building something out of nothing. Of course, the fact that they were nearly penniless and would struggle mightily to pay for their food - and were a large enough group to burden a local economy - and, worse yet, were known to be on bad terms with the Woo Clan - they might find a city willing to take them in… but they couldn't count on it, even if they begged.

Fall came, and they had just finished building the first proper house for their new location, when soldiers of the Woo Clan showed up again.

Their fields were quickly trampled. Their shelters shattered. Their one working house, burned.

It was halfway through fall. Which was, admittedly, a better time to travel than last time they'd been driven out. So they started heading downstream, to the southwest.

But the next night, in the wee hours of the morning, they were awakened by their lookout. As they awoke from their fitful (cold) sleep, they saw several of the Woo Clan's Mages surrounding them. The Mages all had weapons drawn. They were told one word: "Run."

They ran. Sara stayed in the rear, despite many of her elders urging her onwards. Not because the pursuers would hesitate to strike a woman - though maybe; even the troops of the Woo Clan were people (…perhaps only most of them, depending on what rumors you believed…), but rather because she had the second-keenest night-eyes in the group, and she knew the children would soon fall behind.

She was not wrong. Four times, a small child fell behind and their parents missed them in the dark. Four times, Sara saved the child, setting them on the right path forwards, protecting them from any blows.

Four times, she was struck for lagging. And four times, she called it worth it, taking the blow in a child's place.

When dawn rose, their pursuers fell away. They stumbled on another hundred feet, and fell asleep on the grass, exhausted beyond words. Half the day they rested, then they moved onwards again.

Nobody knew if the soldiers would show up again at nightfall, but they assumed the worst. The keenest night-vision among them was her older cousin Peter, and he offered to take the rear if she took the front. She accepted his offer.

And, indeed, the soldiers showed up a few hours into the night. She made it through with only the typical aches of long forced movement, and only the typical bruises of rapidly traversing wilderness. Peter was not so lucky - and, indeed, one blow towards the end of the night had left him breathing only gingerly.

"I'll take the rear today," she told him. And he didn't have the strength to contest it. Nobody in their group had any real supplies, but the local Herbalist (most villages had one) and his apprentice both did what they could. It was enough for him to make it through the day, if only just.

Their whole group crossed the river and headed due west, straight away from the Woo Clan. But that wasn't enough for the soldiers to stop following them.

The fourth day, he took over again. The fifth, she prepared to take the worst post for the third time. But near the end of the fourth day, even as the soldiers of the Woo Clan vanished before dawn once more - the Forest became aware of them all.

They were only a day's journey from the Forest, and heading in the right direction. At this rate and direction, they might meet Newton Village or just barely miss it, either in the wee hours of the morning or shortly into their day's journey.

---

You ask the inhabitants of Newton Village for their thoughts, before you'd even confirmed the identities of their pursuers, and more than half of them reply with something like, "They're coming from Woo Clan territory. Nobody wants to get mixed up in that. Not on their bad side, not if you have anything they could hurt or threaten."

Old Man Materson spends several hours fuming, actually, before retreating to his house to get drunk for the evening, away from everyone (this happens maybe once a month - but not usually as gloomy/dour).

The Speakers both point out "Well, whatever wants the Forest dead probably isn't less bad than these guys, right?" And the reply is, "Well, with that last attack... no... but at the same time, whatever wants the Forest dead hasn't actually won a fight yet… We've never known anyone to win against the Woo - on the rare occasions the Woo lose, they make sure you lose too."

---

The Unpredictable Tree is far from home, having found the distant Colony of Ants that it was seeking. This Ant colony has previously been compared to the Forest itself - sapient and mostly-friendly. The Ants of this place, the Unpredictable Tree can now verify, range in size from smaller-than-normal Ants straight up to the size of medium Dogs. Their Minds are… well, the Unpredictable Tree is hardly a Communication expert, but their Minds are weird - it's not like the Ants of the Forest, that work together to think but have only a single Mind; this is like… a bunch of part-Minds working together. Your Ants do specifically state that their pheromone communications are familiar but much more advanced; they react much like a very young math nerd who has only just finished Algebra but is now looking at a Calculus textbook.

The Unpredictable Tree tries to avoid being initially noticed by the Ants, hoping for backup in the negotiations. It also tries to open a Portal back home - and, towards this goal, meditates on its current location plus the location of its Home. It successfully memorizes the different feel to the winds here, and carefully catalogues the slight-but-noticeable changes to the stars… and that's it. No grand revelation; no profound insight or breakthrough. But you think, maybe, you have enough data to get close to this vicinity via Portal if you later unlock them. You still, after all, don't quite understand how they work - you've discussed your flickers of insight with Mr. Tavish, and heard something that he doesn't fully understand about "folded space" and "general relativity" and "quantum gravity" - you're pretty sure you're going to have to either experiment at length, put a ton of effort into boosting Space Magic (or equivalent), or (most likely of all) buy a book.

The Unpredictable Tree notices flickers of information from the Forest. The barest fraction of a fraction, but enough to know that something has changed. Perhaps the Forest has put a lot of effort into reaching it, or another Tree has headed its way to act as a relay? While the Forest, of course, knows that the second answer is correct, the Unpredictable Tree isn't sure yet. Still, even this faint contact is comforting.

And the comfort is good to have, because the Unpredictable Tree ultimately manages to hide for only roughly half of the turn before the Ant Colony finds it.

The Forest's Ants, that were with the Unpredictable Tree, give it a few days of warning that "they're searching for us." In the end, the Unpredictable Tree decides to give up on a doomed effort and show itself instead of trying to hide until the last possible moment - every day may count, but stealth couldn't have availed it more than another day.

The Tree walks out to the middle of a bunch of Ants, and has its own group of Ants try to signal, "I come in peace." That being a fairly unambiguous pheromone communication, and "take me to your leader" having occasionally been a precursor to assassination in the Ant world.

There isn't an immediate fight, and slowly you work out means of Communication. The Unpredictable Tree and your Ants work together with a will, and slowly learn the grammar of this more advanced pheromone language. Their Ants seem to be willingly teaching you, more curious than hostile at the moment. You eventually manage to puzzle out a message that they are expecting one or more friendly Two-Legs in the near future.

Then a horn blares in the distance, and all the Ants scatter. Several of the smaller ones stay long enough to erase the "friendly" bit from the prior message and replace it with… a dilute form of "hostile," you think? …So, "semi-hostile Two-Legs in the near future?"

(The Mad Scientist Tree is slightly over halfway to the Unpredictable Tree, having made better time (relative to capability for Movement or non-Research write-in) by following Phigment's notes on the first half of the path; this is almost good enough for a relay. Any messages that the Forest wants to send with the Mad Scientist Tree will show up during negotiations. The Seer Tree, @Jack727, could also retroactively decide to have passed along 1 cryptic message to Phigment before this adventure started, if desired. The Mad Scientist Tree should be able to easily meet up with the Unpredictable Tree and the Ants next turn if desired.)

(The Unpredictable Tree still has half of a normal write-in action left, and negotiations may progress swiftly… or not. Other players are welcome to chime in with advice, but cannot directly vote, and any advice will be interpreted as "oh I bet that Tree would think this" in-character. You are completely allowed to pretend to be a normal Tree - if you quickly pick an inconspicuous position in order to observe, this is likely to succeed against the newcomers.)

Phigment said:

So, when the unknown Two-Legs arrive, the Unpredictable Tree will introduce himself, act in a friendly, casual manner, and give them a cunning false identity to allay suspicions:

"Greetings, travelers! I am the wandering adventurer Ulmus Tamarisk, from distant lands. Perhaps you've heard of me? I travel the world, righting wrongs and helping those in need. Do any of you need any help? Or know of anyone nearby who does? Perhaps a princess kidnapped by vampires, or a dark wizard oppressing the land with his fell magics? Ancient evil artifacts that need to be disposed of? Deadly monsters running amok?"

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The Ancient Tall Communications Tree has been seeking the Unpredictable Tree, trying to Connect at this massive range, and by straining to the utmost it succeeds at this considerable task. It succeeds at, if not the best time, certainly a great time.

The Unpredictable Tree, always true to its name, wants to speak, in the tongues of Two-Legs. The Speaking Tree reaches out and shows it how to shape the winds about its branches to mirror speech. And as they approach, the Unpredictable Tree steps out and says its piece.

The group of Two-Legs stop, look around, and scratch their heads. Some pinch themselves. Some point weapons warily at the Unpredictable Tree. A few point weapons in the other direction, expecting some trap. Their - very loud - apparent spokesperson stays still for several long moments, before deciding to recite an obviously-prepared spiel: "We, of Citadel Taur and allies, of the Larongo League, are the sole true protectors and allies of the Thinking Ants. Any interaction with them is to go through us. All trespassers beware, for our arm is long and justice sure. … Umm…

"…I guess if you want our city to hire you, go check the Guild Postings? I don't think there's any requests quite that dramatic last I checked, but they'd be the ones to ask. Or maybe the Uzu family?"

(You have the impression that the Uzu family are in charge of one of Citadel Taur's larger allied city-states.)

(The Larongo League is composed of a bunch of allied city-states. They have various additional internal alliances, and are mostly looked upon favorably, save for two major downsides: the lack of tight Federal control means certain city-states have issues, and the League as a whole tends to be fairly expansionist.)

Walliseatscheese said:

Guild like Adventurer's Guild, or something else? Interesting implications all round anyway.

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Pretty much. I think they have an official title, but I haven't decided yet.
It might be a phrase that acronyms to "ADVENTURE" or similar. If someone thinks up a good and fitting phrase, I'll give them 1.5 auto-successes to distribute as they wish.
Edit: The Accredited Department of Valorous Endeavors, Noble Tribulations, and Untethered Representative Expeditions. Have a free 1.5 auto-successes, Box Lunch!

Walliseatscheese said:

I wonder what it says about the Uzu that this person defaults to sending Ulmus Tamarisk, Mysterious Wandering Do-Gooder!!! to their doorstep...

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That they're the only ones around competent and weird enough to handle you.

Also that - if you are hostile - you'll blow yourself up on their traps, Tree or no Tree, and be out of everyone's hair (metaphorically, not literally).

Walliseatscheese said:

They don't do Slavery, right?

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Joining the League requires a strict adherence to recognizing one (and a bit) basic Sapient Rights: The Right To Vote With Your Feet.

There are a lot of potential abuses, a lot, and quite a few practical ones, but most of the city-states that are majorly exploitative or allow that... tend to see their oppressed people disappear in short order.

Addendum: when I say strict adherence: I mean strict. Trying to get cute with "oh, they owe me a debt so they can't leave" gets you punished extra on top of the basic Rights Violation. Trying to declare "My city-state will be ignoring this law" sees the rest of the League getting together to pounce on you. And so on.

Addendum: brainwashing kids to stay in an abusive environment is considered an extended violation of the basic Sapient Right. Though a lot of people argue it's actually an extra Sapient Right, leading to the "one (and a bit) basic Sapient Rights" verbiage above.

Addendum: You also get a handful of practical Laws that the city-states have to adhere to:

• You mostly, sort-of, have to honor the laws and debts of other city-states and not allow people to flee their debts elsewhere to you. (Terms and conditions apply and are always up for renegotiation in the higher council and courts.)
• You must accept the general currency (and agreeing to stop all attempts at debasing it). (You are allowed to run your own currency on the side; you just have to accept the general currency too.)
• You must not attack fellow members and must support them if attacked (some conditions apply).
• You must suppress general banditry.
• You have to pay a small fee, typically based on your adult population though exceptions apply, to the League.
• You get to elect a delegation* to the League Laconics (which is humorously named as everyone debates endlessly).
  • Delegation: You may elect one or more delegates; there is a specific way to vote that allows you to split your diplomatic weight between multiple options.
• And a few others. (Minor stuff - or stuff I haven't thought of yet.)

A lot of the city-states also adhere to one or both of two common pacts: the Ketling Pact and the Risa Pact, which add a bunch of Basic Rights (and Guarantees) and a bunch of Economic Rights (and Guarantees), respectively. If you're traveling? Try to stick to ones that are part of both Pacts, since those have all of the extra rights and guarantees that mean you don't have to worry about the city-state in question doing anything insane like saying "well you're here so we're confiscating all of your stuff now. Bye; have a nice day."

In practice, their greatest virtue is generally considered the opportunity. If you are wealthy or broke, educated or not, no matter your skin or hair color, etc. - everyone has a good chance at building a good life in the Larongo League. Their second greatest virtue is generally considered the (related) fact that you can almost always find a city-state that fits you.

Nobody agrees about their third, but government theorists particularly like the fact that several city-states are known as "hotbeds of government innovation." One particularly-well-run one is actually financed by several larger city-states in exchange for "innovating - and sharing anything that actually works." Not a lot of the attempts work. But they're literally being paid to prove it, so... As a side-effect: If you've ever wanted to try rigging an election and getting paid for it - in a completely ethical White-Hat Hacker fashion? Go to Columbia Secundus, southwest Larongo League! The place where they'll try (almost) anything: once.

Their greatest vice is generally agreed to be their lack of cohesion, with a fair bit of additional grumbling about hundreds of other things - though many of the grumblers will disagree (and even directly contradict each other) about what.

There are, periodically, attempts to have outside voters move in and take over a given city-state. Some city-states are flat-out dictatorships or oligarchies and are functionally immune (to this takeover strategy). Some have laws like "you must have been born here" or "you must have lived here 5 years" in order to vote. Some people hate those laws. Some love them. Some city-states don't have them. Some people hate that, too.

Lettuce and Gentletrees, I give you: The Larongo League.

Phigment said:

"Wait, there are Thinking Ants? As in, literal ants that are capable of complex reasoning? That's amazing! Do they talk? Can you introduce me to them?
...
Where did they come from? Did your 'Citadel Taur' create them, or are they a naturally occurring species, or were they cursed by a sorceress at some point? What are you protecting them from, and do you need any help?
...
I have SO MANY questions! Let's go back to your camp, and we can discuss at length!"

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Their speaker seems to have regained his bearings, though he still repeats: "We, of Citadel Taur and allies, of the Larongo League, are the sole true protectors and allies of the Thinking Ants. Any interaction with them is to go through us. You are required to obtain permission from officials in Citadel Taur or one of our close allies in order to be permitted to speak with these wondrous beings.

"Though you are allowed to ask questions on their history. Professor Interrog would be the one to ask."

The named Professor steps forwards, and haltingly starts: "Well, I say, I must say, I've never, well. How do you do? The, um, that is, the Ants - they are quite fantastic creatures, aren't they? Possibly moreso than yourself - I have SO MANY QUESTIONS!!! But as far as anyone has ever heard, they claim that they were ordinary Ants until, one day, they saved the life of a Fairy and were blessed by her with Sapience. They claim that this event happened 'several hundred generations' ago, which we take to mean the event occurred shortly after the Cataclysm.

"They can communicate slowly by arranging themselves into written - when they feel like it, which is less often than I (for one) would prefer. Such fascinating perspectives they bring to the table! Oh: There! They've communicated a message now!"

Everyone looks. Written in the local common tongue is the phrase, "We'd happily work with you if you just stopped bugging our actual friends!" Professor Interrog appears to not actually care about the content of the message, lost in the fact that there is one; their leader appears to think that "obviously no Tree would question the Largogo League"; nearly all of the others have their eyes twitching and are clearly thinking something like 'oh, great - now the Tree is going to try fighting us. Great.'

Phigment said:

To the Ants:

"Why, that is remarkable! I think most humans would have a hard time writing a sentence like that. In fact, I can freely confess that you put my own spelling to shame. Is Professor Interrog as fluent in your communication methods as you are in his? I don't imagine that you speak to each other in your hive by spelling out words. Oh, but manners. Greetings, Six-Legged Ones. I am a humble wandering tree, but I am pleased to make your acquaintance."

To the soldiers:

"Oh, stop twitching about like that. You don't seem to be evil, and I'm not going to attack you just because you're pushy. Animals, always nervous. I think it comes from having nerves. And you don't look like you want to attack me, so instead of shuffling around like weasels, just take a nap or something. Practice marching and shouting, if that'll calm you down."

To the Professor:

"So, then, the ants have been members of your 'Larongo League' for hundreds of years? They must be one of the oldest cities in your group. Are they your leaders? Are most members of the League ants, or are there cities of bees and spiders and mice, too?"

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The Ants spell out "?" visually. Their pheromones take a minute for your Ants to pick up, but seem to be roughly: "You react-to shaking*-pheromones? Surprise and self-irritation." (The word interpreted as 'shaking' isn't quite right; the Forest thinks they mean 'vibration'.)

Some soldiers are relieved that you're not taking offense; others contrarily grip their weapons all the tighter.

The leader interjects: "Members? Hardly. They are a proud Protectorate of ours!"

Professor Interrog, meanwhile, has - as previously stated - SO MANY QUESTIONS: "How are you talking?!? Are you vibrating your leaves? How do you walk - do your roots not actually sink into the ground, or? How did you become a tree? Were you born like this?"

Phigment said:

If they ask why Ulmus Tamarisk is a tree, it's because some time ago he was cursed by a sorceress, as mysterious as she is beautiful, which lead to him taking up the life of mobile do-goodery.

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"I've never met a confirmed example of a Baleful Polymorph retaining their true intellect; how long have you been transformed? What do you eat? What Sorceress transformed you? Do you lose your leaves in the winter?"

Phigment said:

"Is that true, Ants? Are you proud to be their protectorate? Why haven't you joined this League of theirs? You seem much more sensible than them; I bet they could use your perspective.

...

"I apologize. I think I confused you there. Of course, I've always been a tree. The sorceress didn't curse me with being a tree; that would hardly be a curse, now would it? No, she cursed me into moving. There I was basking in the sunshine, having a lovely growing season, and this woman came walking up. Probably a human, like you; right number of arms and legs, at least. She said she was in a hurry, and told me to get out of her way. I said, 'I beg your pardon, ma'am, but I'm a tree, so I figure I'll just stay right here where I'm planted.' That made her angry, and she stamped her foot, and said, 'Since you didn't move when I gave you the choice, now you won't have any choice but to move!' After that, I was able to get out of her way, but I've had the wanderlust. I can't bear to stay in one place for more than a season or two. Very inconvenient. But I'm making the best of it.

I talk by magic, of course, and by moving my smaller twigs. Walking is just a matter of moving one root at a time, so I don't get off balance and fall. And I usually shed my leaves in the winter, when it gets cold and dark. Don't want leaf frost; I can tell you that's no fun! Although, maybe if I went somewhere warm in the winter I wouldn't. Have to try that some time.

How about you? Were you born a professor, or did you get cursed into it? Why do you wear things on your feet, anyhow? Don't they interfere with your ability to feel the dirt and absorb water?"

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At the sentence "Were you born a professor, or did you get cursed into it," one of the guards can't quite suppress a chuckle. He quickly stops at the glares of his fellows.

The Professor mutters, "Sorceress. Must be a Fairy." Then, yet quieter, he adds, "Or something weirder."

(To be continued.)

---

Votes:

Do you want to hire the former Lumburglar, Steve Robertson?
He's willing to be hired quite cheaply, as long as there is plenty of adventure.
[ ][Hire Former Lumburglar] Yes
[ ][Hire Former Lumburglar] No
[ ][Hire Former Lumburglar] Pretend Newton Village can't even contact the "Wizard"
(You are more than welcome to write-in your desired contact methodology - or a desired methodology for sending him elsewhere.)

(Investigating the sick kid counts as a Write-in on your upcoming turn. Or else as an action for the Speakers or someone else. If you phrase the Write-in as "send a note to the Lumburglar party," you could potentially offer deals to several of them at once, should you choose to do so. If the Consensus of the Forest is against such an Action, it may be fully or partially vetoed.)

Talanburg
[ ][Talanburg] Contact them immediately
[ ][Talanburg] Try to hold off as long as possible
[ ][Talanburg] Try to disconnect

Choices for if the first option is chosen. Vote by plan, and make sure to note what you're willing to offer in trade:
[ ][Talanburg Diplomacy] Vote by plan

Woo and Rin
[ ][Rin Refugees] Give them refuge
[ ][Rin Refugees] Move along

[ ][Woo Clan Soldiers] Divert them away from you
[ ][Woo Clan Soldiers] Negotiate
[ ][Woo Clan Soldiers] Mind-control them into compliance
[ ][Woo Clan Soldiers] Kill them too swiftly to easily be noticed
[ ][Woo Clan Soldiers] Make an example of them

Lumber and Goods
How do you want to handle the Unusual Lumber Sale and Receivable Goods? (This option is partially retroactive, since it wasn't definitively decided at the time.)
[ ][Lumber and Goods] Trust But Verify
-The Traders - whose leader has a well-earned reputation for honesty - will be acquiring things for you, and transporting them to you for you to buy when they show back up. They'll pick based on your brainstorming requests. You are allowed to refuse items if they don't match what you want, though please don't force them to transport too much back.
[ ][Lumber and Goods] Send a Representative
-You send someone to Andrewsburg to negotiate on your behalf. Saves transportation costs (everything is 7% cheaper), but requires you to send someone there. (Would save 15% if you could also transport it back yourself somehow.)
[ ][Lumber and Goods] Write-in