Where the Hell Am I Now?! (Ranma 1/2 \ RWBY)

Y'know it occurs to me that Ranma and Jack may actually get along very well for all the wrong reasons.

They are both inventive, sadistic assholes. Who happen to have a few redeeming qualities.

I mean this collar thing? Yeah, pure dick move motivated by sadistic vengeance. On the other hand, does anyone doubt that Jack (this Jack and Handsome Jack) wouldn't give Ranma a standing ovation for beating the crap out of a certain someone with their own severed arm? Jack is probably all on board with that.

They also seem to both be total workaholics who would understand the need for trivial things like focus so deep you ignore trifling things like other people's feelings, conventional limitations, and morality. Because anything goes in the name of martial arts/business.

Seriously, no dirty trick is likely too low if it becomes necessary. Or particularly amusing.

I mean outside of inventive douchebag mode they can be nice people, well meaning even. It's when you get on their bad side, or they start seeing you as a good opportunity to hone their craft against, that you need to worry.

Scary. And entertaining.
 
...Actually, wait. Important question. When is this piece written?

Cause if this was written in the present, then that means it's been two weeks since the fight. That's a long time.

Was Ranma really so brutalized he was unconscious for two weeks? Cause by his standards, that is insane. If that had happened I'd expect his first sensation upon waking to be his stomach trying to devour the rest of him.

If this is just sometime in the future and we're just not gonna encounter Yang for a while, that's one thing. Although I wouldn't put it past Ranma to make something go boom so loudly it brought Yang out early.

Still. This explains why Jack Schnee never found Yang. She's the hottest shut-in on the face of the world.
 
Cut in half is just a scratch?

....Oh right, he had a recovery time after the Yang fight. I mean he had himself more or less in one piece pretty fast in the fight, but that's a good reason for a long recovery time.

I stand by my point of Ranma's stomach being shockingly quiet if it's really been that long though. If such long periods of time really have passed, Ranma really hasn't been able to tell. I mean I thought he was more or less on his feet the day after of the Yang fight, so nearly two weeks passing, or similar periods of time, is pretty surprising.
 
....Oh right, he had a recovery time after the Yang fight. I mean he had himself more or less in one piece pretty fast in the fight, but that's a good reason for a long recovery time.

I stand by my point of Ranma's stomach being shockingly quiet if it's really been that long though. If such long periods of time really have passed, Ranma really hasn't been able to tell. I mean I thought he was more or less on his feet the day after of the Yang fight, so nearly two weeks passing, or similar periods of time, is pretty surprising.
It's been three days since Ranma's arrival. The Yang interlude is in the future.
 
It's been three days since Ranma's arrival. The Yang interlude is in the future.
Hahaha, she is so screwed. That's enough prep-time for Ranma to have a dozen new techniques ready.

But Yang's got a massive overall super powerup...

Nahh Ranma's gonna have a BS counter ready. One of our training actions will give us one that'll counter her...

Or we could just talk it out.
...

Totally gonna be another giant dust tower in two weeks. Maybe even a forest.
 
But Yang's got a massive overall super powerup...

Nahh Ranma's gonna have a BS counter ready. One of our training actions will give us one that'll counter her...

Or we could just talk it out.
...

Totally gonna be another giant dust tower in two weeks. Maybe even a forest.
schnee will probably try to incite a bloody feud for as many fights as possible if thats the case.
 
Elaborate Machiavellian Plans to continue Yang and Ranma's fighting.
Plans are completely derailed, but Yang and Ranma still end up fighting because Ranma.

???
Schnee pretends to be Xantos level good.
Or he tries for fights and Yang somehow ends up as another Ranma fiance.
 
Given how her semblance seems to cause her hair- eyes- and occasionally skin to emit a shitload of light, I'm wondering if she hasn't at least been partially converting her own body into energy and back again. That might explain the 'punching stuff for two weeks while not eating' thing- if she's been running at a threshold where she's flipping back and forth between an energy state, then she'd only need a fraction of the nutrients and water a normal person would need.

Not sure where she's getting the aura for all of that though, since she doesn't have much of a chargeup time. Maybe she's tapped a leyline or something
 
Well, bored. Or more accurately, bored and with a pile of work I don't want to do, so I'm doing something else.

So, medical techniques. I didn't think that much of it at first because it's probably one of the hardest to pull off without instruction. And if we screw up, may have some of the greater consequences.

On the other hand, we get the shit kicked outta us a lot. Getting something we can use in combat may be pushing things too far, but it may not be impossible. It's probably going to take some time and effort, but it'd be nice if it happened.

Being able to treat ourselves would be awesome though. Ranma and pretty much everyone else mutilates themselves in the name of training and becoming stronger. Downtime healing is a pain. But if Ranma can work out how to accelerate his healing process, beyond his current ludicrous levels, then we can shorten that period of time. Obvious benefits are obvious.

But I'm mostly thinking it may let us cut down on Bakusai Tenketsu training even more. After Earthbender Ryoga I highly doubt we'll ever match him in earth manipulation, but that's not the main benefit of the training anyway. The absurd damage resistance and endurance is. And as they say, ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. Having both is even better. As a side bonus, some ability to interfere with Ryoga's new trick may be better than none.

Now mind you, I'm not in a rush to push Bakusai Tenketsu on its own because it takes a fair chunk of time, and for that time probably doesn't pay out compared to other options.

Healing others, usually a pretty good thing, and usually good and spreading goodwill. This is Ranma though, he's as likely to fix a person as he is to piss them off and goad them into hurting themselves even more. Still, being able to put people together is on the whole a good thing.

A healing coma may be entirely possible though. We have PSoI. We can, quite literally, throw as much Ki at our problems as we want. More does not always equal better, but sometimes it does. This certainly seems to hold true for Ranma's current self-healing. Moreover, if we can lower our body temperature far enough without actually suffering from the adverse effects of hypothermia, we may actually be able to slow down whatever is killing us. The main trick would be keeping the healing process going.

The navel gazing meditation may help us here. Tie in stuff like unlocking chakras or the meditation crap with the aiming of preserving our life and healing our body. A deeper understanding of his body lets him heal it better. It may be productive enough that Ranma doesn't blow it off, although he'd probably have to be significantly injured (like, perhaps, now) before he'd consider getting into it.

If the two aims synergize, fantastic. If not....well, they're alright on their own? It's pretty stiff competition for what to do here, especially with the Umi/Yamasenken and that awesome hair whip.

Really advanced would probably be putting someone else in a healing coma. Harder, but also a very nice trick, and if PSoI can be spammed to overpower problems with Ki, may even work very well. It depends how it works. I have not gotten the impression that throwing ki at problems is going to be what medical techniques are, certainly doesn't seem like Tofu's style. But even if it is Tofu's gig, Ranma may end up pretty good at anatomy given his background so it could still work out alright. Ranma certainly has experience in breaking a body, he can probably work out putting it back together.

Food for thought.

Although one last idea, this is pure speculation, but if the dragon's whisker being tied around Ranma's hair kept it from growing, I wonder if using Yang's hair as a hairtie, or thread, or something might have similar defensive/user directed qualities. Offense is awesome, don't get me wrong, but defense is nice, especially if it fire proofs us. Or if it means Ranma leaves his own heat trail, and enough spinning makes him the epicenter of his own personal cyclone, or just straight up fly.

That it means Ranma wears Yang's hair to the rematch is just a bonus. Really. It's not because I'm amused at the idea and misunderstandings that will result from Ranma running around wearing a lock of a woman's hair. Or because it's perfect irony and tragicomedy that Ranma protects himself from Yang's wrath by the very thing he took from her, and that it will drive Yang's :rage: to even greater heights.

Really.
 
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so. this is a good quest, even if I have next to no knowledge of ranma other than the gender thing and his being hilariously OP. I look forward to the next update, and humbly request that the yang training segment be added to the index at some point. bye now.
 
Part 15
[X] "Uh, hey; not to bother you or anything Jack, but why does your secretary have a collar on the platter she brought everything with? And why's it blinking? And why does it have Blake's name on i-oooh. Oh..." Maybe try to...um, you dunno, help Ms. Kitty out here?

Weiss wheeled herself out of the room, declining any attempt from you to help her saying, "I think I've had enough of your...special assistance Ranma, I can move myself." You shrugged in response, you didn't really care one way or another; it was her call, you were just offering a helping hand. You still helped with the door though, mainly because she couldn't properly work the handle from her chair. As you opened the door and were about to leave the room after Weiss, you noticed something from the corner of your eye; something that made you hesitate and pause for a moment.

Still midway through the door, you called out to Weiss, "Hey, I'll be there in a sec; just wanna talk some things over with your old man. Tell Winter I said to get well soon and hope she's ok." Weiss looks a little confused, but nods in agreement and heads off to meet with her older sister. You, meanwhile, go back inside the conference room to deal with the elephant in the room that was very well hidden. Slowly, you closed the door and walked back to your seat; carefully sitting down again and looking back and forth between what was on the silver platter that had refreshments from earlier and the man who ordered them delivered.

"So, Jack..." You pointed at the collar sitting innocently and harmlessly on the platter with everything else, "Mind explaining what that's all about?"

Everyone's eyes immediately turned to where you were pointing, finally seeing the collar that was innocuously hidden on the platter. Both Blake and General Ironwood turned towards Jack immediately and rose up, a look of fury and chagrin on their respective faces. Inadvertently in unison, they began to protest against Jack's apparent punishment. All the meanwhile, Jack was calmly sipping on a glass of water, completely nonchalant.

"You lying, conniving, racist son of a bitch! I should've known all that earlier talk was just-"

"Rau, you know this won't do you any favors. I thought you were trying to step away from the image of-"

Immediately the old CEO stood up and slammed his glass into the table, a loud thud and echoing shatter filling the room and silencing all protests. Etched in his eyes was a baleful rage and in his hand was the shards of shattered glass, digging deeper and deeper as his fist was clenched in anger. With a furious shout he killed any further protest, "ENOUGH!"

He turned vehemently towards Blake, and with barely restrained bile in his voice he uttered, "You do not get to speak; not after what you've done to my daughters. Because of you, Weiss was almost crippled for life and Winter almost died from the sheer shock and stress of it all! Stress that wasn't helped by seeing her younger sibling in a pool of her own blood looking half dead. So whatever petty protests and complaints you may have, you can just shove them right up your ass!"

"And as for you!" Jack turned right onto the general, his temper and enraged speech not losing any momentum for a second, "You should know me better than that James; it's not about race, it's never about race despite what all those bastards out there think. I don't care if it was Remnant's most pathetic Faunus pauper or the damn Wizard of Vale descended from his emerald spires himself; I'd still do to them what I'm doing to this girl if they were to blame! Because at the end of the day, my daughters almost died; and it was in part by this girl's hand!

Now I already know what you're going to say, and you're right: they didn't die and in the end the Faunus girl did change sides. But, all things considered, my daughters came real damn close to having their lives ruined or lost; and I'd say that each instance comes to around...half a life, don't you think? The trauma, the pain, the suffering; even with the lucky break and last minute save, I say it's still only fair that all of that still counts for something, right?

And last I checked; two halves equals one whole, meaning that my daughters are owed a life for the pain they've been through. An eye for an eye James; you know that's how I roll. That's what I learned from my father, and what he learned from his father before; and though I may not like the bastard, I'll admit that he wasn't completely full of shit and vitriol."

Wow, you...had no idea how to even begin to respond to that; and judging from General Ironwood's face, neither did he. And Blake; well, she just wilted and cringed with every word that came out of Old Man Schnee's mouth. She clearly wasn't taking the reminder of what happened well, especially with hearing just how bad it almost was. Hell, you didn't realize that things had gotten that bad; and hearing it from Jack only hammered it in. He was Winter's and Weiss's dad, and he had to sit back and watch as one daughter was almost crippled for life while the other was teetering on the brink of death; all the while incapable of doing anything but pray that the doctors could fix it.

And you could see it clear as day, even though you weren't exactly the best at reading the atmosphere; Jack's raw sorrow, rage, and feelings of complete helplessness and incompetence radiated off of him so blatantly that you'd have to be an unfeeling robot to miss it. The man was angry, and looking to do something to make things right again from his perspective.

"Now, this is how it's going to go down," Jack continued, after taking a moment to compose himself somewhat, "Miss Belladonna here is going to let me put that collar on her. Said collar has both a tracker to ensure that I and several other select individuals know where she is at all times. It was also hold a small, high-yield Dust explosive capable of vaporizing her completely the moment she is outside of the range of the tracker's receivers or is deemed necessary to do so by her handlers. Then, she will work for my daughters; whatever they ask of her, she will do without hesitation or complaint to the best of her abilities. She will continue to be my daughters' servant until it is deemed by them that she has done enough to atone for the suffering she caused them, or after a year and a day; whichever takes longer.

She will also protect them and put their lives above her's at any given moment, if it comes between them and her; she better damn well choose them or else she'll be dead regardless. It's only fair, given that she almost took their lives away by her own hand. As I see it, this part covers almost killing Winter, and the servant part covers almost crippling Weiss for life. She nearly killed Winter, so now she has to die for her when necessary. She almost robbed Weiss of her arm and leg, so now she gets to act as her arm and will manifest when commanded.

Now, if there aren't any other objections I beli-" Before he could finish, Jack was interrupted by a loud clamping sound. Turning to the source of it, everyone saw a teary-eyed Blake having just put on the collar herself, looking completely devastated, guilty, and miserable. In a guilt-ridden tone full of regret, she asked quietly, "Can...can I at least get a different design on the collar?"

Thrown off by her compliance, Old Man Schnee paused for a minute before responding. "Ah, I suppose that's fine; I'll...contact someone to change it, just...answer them when they call Ranma."

Well, that didn't seem too bad, all Blake had to do was pick up when someone called-wait a minute. Hold up.

You asked Jack in confusion, "Uhh, call me? Why me?"

To which he blithely replied back, "Why, because you're one of the people I've trusted to keep watch over our repentant prisoner, of course!"

What?!

Before you could even protest out loud, Jack continued, "There's a receiver for the collar tracker in your scroll; if she ventures so much as a single inch out of range the bomb triggers. You've proven yourself far more than trustworthy enough for this Ranma; besides, you were the one to reach out to the poor girl and make her change sides. It's probably for the best that you continue to keep an eye on her."

Well...shit, you couldn't exactly argue with that logic; you were the one spewing all those lines and speeches that got her to turn on the terrorists. Not to mention that you were unbiased and the only one of the whole group who wasn't affected by Ms. Kitty's actions as a whole, meaning that you were probably going to be the only possible friendly person around her. Obviously Jack made his stance clear, and you weren't going to bet of Weiss or Winter's reactions being much better.

So, with a heavy sigh, you tell Schnee, "Alright fine, I'll do it. Now, if there isn't anything else; I'm going to go now. And I guess I'm taking Blake with me."

"By all means, go right on ahead Ranma," Jack tells you, "And do call if you need anything, my people are at your service."

You just grunt and nod in affirmation, not exactly in the mood to talk anymore; then leave, with Blake tailing behind you, still guilt-ridden and like a wilting flower.

Well, that sure as hell didn't go as planned; you not only failed to talk Jack out of collaring Blake, but were now also her parole officer, so to speak. You felt like venting right about now, and fortunately you knew just how to do it.

[X] Training Time! (Pick 1~3)
-- [X] You just pulled the Splitting Cat Hairs out of your ass yesterday, now it's time to actually practice and master it
-- [X] You've fought a Saffron-level opponent and a terrorist organization in the span of two days, and you doubt it's going to be any better anytime soon. You hate to do this, but perhaps it's time to unseal the Umi- and Yamasenkens so you are prepared for fights of that caliber in the future.
-- [X] You got bisected; let's repeat that, you got bisected. Shit, that right there is some serious damage and you just barely lucked out of not dying. Unfortunately, you never really got the chance to bum any techniques from Tofu; but hey, how hard can it be to heal with ki right?
-- [X] It slices, it dices, it extends and hardens; and best of all it ignites on fire! Get your own Magical Flaming Hair for one easy payment of Ass-kicking from Blondie, tax and shipping excluded. Seriously though, the damn hair was a wonderful improvised weapon that's been pulling it's weight; maybe you should look into it a bit more?
-- [X] Neko-ken ahahahahahaa...no. Nope. Nuh-uh. Now way no how, not gonna happen.
-- [X] So, since everything in this world runs on ki...and you've started figuring out some serious ki manipulation...maybe you should try some stuff on the robots or something? Hey, maybe it'll lead to something; who knows?
-- [X] Dust. Crystallized ki used to empower people, blow stuff up, and overall do just about anything. Sounds legit; maybe you should experiment with the stuff.

[X] Go meet up with Weiss and Winter. Someone has to explain what the hell just happened and why they now have a catgirl maidservant on call.

[X] Fuck it, you feel like punching someone; so now you are gonna punch someone. Maybe even several someones. Repeatedly even. It'll be a grand ol' punchapalooza! There's gotta be someone around who's deserving of an ass-whuppin, right?


Author's Note: So, as probably every RWBY fan knows by now; RWBY's creator, Monty Oum, has passed away as of Febuary 1, 2015. The status of the series, his personal pet project that was practically a child to him, is uncertain; though it seems highly likely it'll continue on as that's what he would've wanted. Everyone at Roosterteeth thanked all the people who donated to him and his family when he was in intensive care, and who gave their well-wishes and eventual respect at his passing. They said that, for those who wanted to honor his passing, that they should do something creative; to pull from the recesses of our minds and make manifest our dreams and fantasies like Monty did, and to press on to see it through.

This one's for you Monty; for being an inspiration and a rekindling of creativity in myself and countless others. May your work carry on and continue to entertain, inspire, and ensnare many more to come. For it is in passing that we achieve immortality, through this we become a paragon of virtue and glory to rise above all. Infinite in distance and unbound by death, may your soul soar free, and in the heavenly raiment above us all; bring us inspiration and drive.
 
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RIP Monty

[X] Go meet up with Weiss and Winter. Someone has to explain what the hell just happened and why they now have a catgirl maidservant on call.

As I understand it.
Then, she will work for my daughters; whatever they ask of her, she will do without hesitation or complaint to the best of her abilities. She will continue to be my daughters' servant until it is deemed by them that she has done enough to atone for the suffering she caused them, or after a year and a day; whichever takes longer.

Probably should get on that.
 
You missed the 'whichever is longer' part of the arrangement; so even if you manage to get them to forgive Blake right off the bat, she's still stuck in servitude for a year and a day.
More thinking that we probably should get the arrangements sorted out so that Blake isn't in a living hell for longer.
Being a servant to non-abusive masters for a year and a day isn't so bad.
 
[X] Go meet up with Weiss and Winter.
Someone has to explain what the hell
just happened and why they now have
a catgirl maidservant on call.
 
[X] Go meet up with Weiss and Winter. Someone has to explain what the hell just happened and why they now have a catgirl maidservant on call.

...damn!

That. That was well written @EnderofWorlds . While his reasoning is a bit off Jack made a surprisingly strong case for Catgirl!Meido!Bodyguard!Blade. Even better is that it was presenting in such a way as to hit all of Blake's buttons.

It obviously hit Blake's guilt over what she has been doing up until now but more then that it hit on her desire for atonement. Blake, in my eyes at least, became Huntress not just because it could give her the power to change things but also because it gave her a chance to make up for the what she's done by saving lives.

Serving Weiss and Winter gives her a chance to make up for what she has done in a far more direct way.
 
[X] Go meet up with Weiss and Winter. Someone has to explain what the hell just happened and why they now have a catgirl maidservant on call.
 
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