Soul Number 11270 (Piri): "Don't worry, my lady, I will take proper care of the young lady and teach her everything I know myself."
Aurelia: "My thanks to you." * This is weird ... I know she said it sincerely, but now for some reason, I'm even more worried. *

Seriously though, I hope to see more interaction with the young princess. Quarta and Piri can make a very funny duo considering how different they are.
 
I mean, it's actually possible there is a reward for Reincarnee of the Decade. It's just due to corruption no one thinks there is, as it gets diverted to someone else.

On other matters, there's also no guarantee that the Star of Heavenly Joy will end up getting that role anytime soon. I mean, with cutthroat politics, there might well be something that continues to delay that position being filled. Or someone else slide into place. Only to get removed because of other maneuvers.

Piri accidentally giving herself more time without even knowing it with the right phrasing in trying to save herself. I mean Aurelia doesn't seem to like the idea of having Cassius take that position. So incidental ideas/discussion while Piri tries not to reveal her identity might end up actually helping.

Haha! I love the idea of there being a reward for Reincarnee of the Decade that never goes to the actual Reincarnee of the Decade!

Yep, lots and lots of politics in the Heavenly bureaucracy. In this case, it helps Piri.

Piri hopes to keep her identity secret from Aurelia for as loooong as possible. Neither of them likes Cassius, so they'd be natural allies if Aurelia didn't hate Piri so much.

Pretty sure that's true of many Employee of the Month type things, so it's very appropriate. Empty honours are a very cheap and efficient way to stimulate desired behaviour.

Hm, presumably when Aurelia gets the full details of the incident in a month, she's also going to find out who Soul #11270 really is. Piri might want to have something good to say for herself when their proper reunion occurs. Better find lil'Quarta and try and help her survive a bit longer this time around, maybe.

Cassius is a very good villain. Very hatable. And, the fact that he received heavenly rewards for the same acts that Piri was tortured to death for, makes her much easier to root for, despite her frankly evil past actions. 'Tis good.

Well, how many details Aurelia can get about the incident depends on how benevolent Glitter feels. Right now, the answer is "not very." Glitter hates it when star gods and goddesses pull rank on her, since in the end, she's only a star sprite.

Glad you like Cassius as a villain! I'm trying to portray him as evil, but a human rather than demonic kind of evil.

Soul Number 11270 (Piri): "Don't worry, my lady, I will take proper care of the young lady and teach her everything I know myself."
Aurelia: "My thanks to you." * This is weird ... I know she said it sincerely, but now for some reason, I'm even more worried. *

Seriously though, I hope to see more interaction with the young princess. Quarta and Piri can make a very funny duo considering how different they are.

Haha! Aurelia's maternal instincts are screaming that something is very very wrong with this soul.

There will be Piri-Quarta interactions in the future!
 
Piri hopes to keep her identity secret from Aurelia for as loooong as possible. Neither of them likes Cassius, so they'd be natural allies if Aurelia didn't hate Piri so much.
Well, yeah, but I was imagining Piri accidentally, or at least not intentionally saying things that get Aurelia to go directly after Cassius. Due to being so focused on not revealing her own identity. Or end up saying something that gives inspiration.

Though I'm now imagining Piri, during one of her times in between lives ends up trying to help out, to get in a good favor exchange or something, and end up completely wrecking Cassius' day.

Or, Piri knocks over some arrangement of boxes, and ends up rearranging them in a different order. Cassius having sorted appropriate bribes gifts. And the new order has each one being either something the recipient hates, or is an thinly disguised insult. (He was using resources he'd have access to if/when he gets the position to help deliver them. Because of course he would. Thus why Piri would even have been able to knock into them. For this, they'd be in the hallway for a brief amount of time.)

It'd certainly set him back for a bit. And he'd probably end up hand delivering any future gifts, just to avoid the same mess from happening again. Further slowing him down.
 
Well, yeah, but I was imagining Piri accidentally, or at least not intentionally saying things that get Aurelia to go directly after Cassius. Due to being so focused on not revealing her own identity. Or end up saying something that gives inspiration.

Though I'm now imagining Piri, during one of her times in between lives ends up trying to help out, to get in a good favor exchange or something, and end up completely wrecking Cassius' day.

Or, Piri knocks over some arrangement of boxes, and ends up rearranging them in a different order. Cassius having sorted appropriate bribes gifts. And the new order has each one being either something the recipient hates, or is an thinly disguised insult. (He was using resources he'd have access to if/when he gets the position to help deliver them. Because of course he would. Thus why Piri would even have been able to knock into them. For this, they'd be in the hallway for a brief amount of time.)

It'd certainly set him back for a bit. And he'd probably end up hand delivering any future gifts, just to avoid the same mess from happening again. Further slowing him down.

Hmm, I can see Piri saying things on purpose and accidentally and accidentally-on-purpose to stir up Aurelia against Cassius!

The image of Piri completely wrecking Cassius' attempt to deliver bribes and ingratiate himself with people is hilarious! It would certainly set him back. He's not a nice person, so he has allies/collaborators/hangers-on but not really true friends.
 
Chapter 23: Softshell Turtle, Again
Chapter 23: Softshell Turtle, Again

This time, it was early spring when I hatched on the banks of Black Sand Creek. I knew because the willows overlooking the river had sprouted furry grey catkins, and the water temperature, while still cold, was not baby-turtle-killingly so.

The water spirits were more subdued, staying close to home as they waited for spring to begin in earnest. I didn't see nearly as many customers frequenting the pubs, and the Water Court gateway looked more woebegone and deserted than ever. (That sign really needed replacing before it rotted clean away. I was a little surprised Nagi hadn't noticed.)

As for the mortal fish, they were busy preparing nests and laying eggs. I glided back and forth along the river, devouring insects and whatever else was small enough for me to get my jaws around, and memorizing the locations of clutches. I was looking forward to this year's baby fish. The existing ones were too big to attack, and I was sick of eating bugs.

While I counted the days until my food hatched, I considered the Lord Silurus problem. Although I hadn't approached his stretch of river, I also hadn't heard any water spirits shrieking about his latest appearance, so presumably he was still wintering in his lair. At any rate, the river was too cold for human children to play in (or, more to the point, for human parents to allow human children to play in), so I didn't need to worry about another Maila-type fiasco yet. What in the world was I supposed to do about that overgrown catfish anyway? How did Flicker expect a turtle with a soft shell to kill a demon?

Worst advice ever.

But fine. I could work with this. For a start, I'd grow as big and strong as possible. Depending on my growth rate, it might take a few years, but compared to the centuries I'd already spent languishing in White and Green Tiers, what was a handful of years? I could afford some patience. And in the meantime, I'd save up positive karma in other ways – and stay far away from Lord Silurus so I couldn't see him eating any humans.

When the first batch of catfish eggs that I was monitoring hatched, I was ready.

Out of the hole poured a stream of thin, silvery fry about half my length, waggling their bodies clumsily. Hidden behind a clump of eelgrass, I watched them bumble into open water and form into a messy school. Somehow, they reached a consensus about direction and started moving, inhaling water bugs as they went.

By chance, it happened to be in my direction.

Creeping closer, I studied them. Already, there were noticeable size differences between the largest fry and their siblings. With my eyes, I marked several that would make a decent meal. My stomach rumbled. For how slowly this body grew, it was constantly hungry.

One of the fry I'd selected turned on its neighbor, which thrashed its tail but couldn't get out of the way fast enough. The large fry ripped off a chunk of flesh and lunged for a second bite. Click click click click click! The small fry were panicking and scattering, while the other large fry fought for their share of sibling.

In all the confusion, I glided out from my hiding spot, barreled into my closest target, and bit down on its back. My jaws crunched through its spine, filling my mouth with tender, juicy succulence. I gulped down a huge bite.

Mmmm. So fresh. So sweet. However much I enjoyed cooked meat, raw flesh had a silkiness that nothing could match.

The fry's mouth was opening and shutting, its front fins flailing. I ripped off a second hunk from its side and chewed happily, taking time to savor the flavors. With its spine severed, the fry wasn't going anywhere. Ahhhhh. So much tastier than bugs, which were mostly shell and barely had any insides to speak of. While the crunch was interesting, I'd really missed muscle and fat. Too bad this fry didn't have much of either. Once I was big enough, I'd have to try a full-grown catfish.

Sensing blood, the other large fry swarmed me, trying to steal my meal. I spun and snapped at one that was nibbling on the tail, forcing it to back off.

Stop it! That's mine!

Undeterred, a second one snuck up on the dead fry's other side.

Go away!

I whacked it with my flipper, but while I was distracted, a third tore off the dead fry's fin. After that, so many fish crashed into me that they knocked me aside, and then my meal vanished into the middle of a writhing, silver ball. Furious, I started tearing chunks out of whatever fry on the edges I could get. As soon as they started bleeding, their neighbors attacked them too.

One fry's fin started to click, followed by another's. Attracted by the frenzy, an adult catfish was approaching. In a flash, the fry reformed into a school and zipped downstream, leaving the water stained with blood and full of their floating, half-eaten siblings.

I certainly wasn't big enough to fight an adult catfish. Diving into the nearest hole, I fumed as it finished off the dying fry. After it had cleared the water, it swam on.

Well, even if I hadn't gotten to finish a single fish in peace, I'd gotten a decent meal for the first time in this life. That counted as an overall victory.

Right on cue, my stomach rumbled.

I sighed. Time to find more food.

Successive batches of catfish fry provided not only delicious meals but also useful hunting skills. I soon learned that if I barreled into a fry on the edge of the school, I could separate it from its siblings far enough to gulp the whole thing down. The warning fin-clicks were annoying, but I found that I could prowl after the school, observe my target, and determine which fin it favored. If I bit that one off at once, it couldn't warn its siblings, and the others were too dumb to notice that one had gone missing. Hence the school wouldn't flee.

Further experimentation showed that after silencing a fry, I could seize it by the tail, haul it to a secluded spot, and enjoy it at my leisure.

Even more testing revealed that I could herd catfish, even catfish larger than me. While I was small, I was vicious. This turtle body had a powerful bite. I'd swim at my target and nip at it and terrify it into going where I wanted it to go.

Hmmm. Interesting. Did that work on other types of fish?

As spring progressed, I discovered that indeed, as long as I wasn't overly ambitious, I could tug or chase fish around Black Sand Creek. Fish-steering. Now that presented fascinating possibilities.

No matter how hideous softshell turtles were, being able to crawl onto land periodically was much better than staying in the water all the time. When I wasn't eating or experimenting on fish, I was basking on a sandy stretch of riverbank, enjoying the sunlight while I surveyed the river and its surroundings. As spring progressed, wild geese and swallows flew back north, and shoots poked out of branches. Day by day they grew, until greenery was everywhere. I kept an eye out for human children, but either the water was too cold, or they were too busy with the spring planting, or both. Good.

When fishing began in earnest again, I tracked the boats to identify their patterns. Obviously, I wasn't planning to sacrifice myself to the fishing net this life – but nothing stopped me from sacrificing others. It was even good for their karma counts. See how what a good person I'm becoming, Flicker? Quake before my altruism!

I quickly became an expert at chasing fish into nets. A few times, I got swept up too, but I was so small that the fishermen just tossed me back.

Eel traps, which humans tied to branches and lowered into the water, provided another opportunity. After cautious inspection, I determined that they were long cones woven from willow twigs, with two layers and bait placed at the pointy end. Eels were really dumb and slithered into whatever small, dark hole they came across, and once they'd gotten into the space between the layers, they didn't have room to turn around. The humans would row along the river and check each trap in turn. If they'd caught anything, they'd open the pointy end, dump the eels out, and then reset the trap.

A shame that eels were too big for me to handle – an attempt to herd one ended with me fleeing – but as a boat's shadow approached, I shoved a catfish into the trap and lumbered onto land to observe. A weather-beaten human was manning the oars, while his daughter leaned out and hauled up their traps. When she got to the one with my offering, she called, "We caught something!"

She opened the pointy end – and a single catfish flopped onto the bottom of the boat. After a moment of shock, she scrambled to bash it over the head before it leaped over the side. Blinking, she asked her father, "How'd a catfish get in here, Da?"

I stuck out my neck, listening as hard as I could, expecting them to start comparing the habits of eels and catfish and speculating suspiciously on how a catfish got stuck in an eel trap – but the fisherman just grunted. "Better 'an nuthin'."

"Yep."

With a shrug, the girl tossed the catfish into a basket on top of a couple eels. Then she reset the trap and dropped it back into the river. They rowed on.

Well, that was a resounding success. They hadn't even complained that the fish was too small. Peasants' desire to fill their bellies really was one of their more endearing traits, the lack of intellectual curiosity being another.

Excellent.

And that was how I spent the next few years alternating between eating fish so I could grow bigger, and chasing them into nets and traps so my karma total could grow bigger.

One day, I was lying on the riverbed, digesting and grumbling to myself over how slowly this body grew, when a patrol of Yulus' shrimp guards tapped past. On instinct, my neck darted out and I snapped at the closest one, but he brought up his spear and smacked me across the snout with the flat of his blade.

I barely suppressed a yelp of pain. While I was whimpering inwardly and clamping my flippers over my face, the patrol continued on its way.

I considered chasing down the guard and ripping him and his partner into tiny shreds and then not eating them, but that wasn't how mortal turtles acted. And I couldn't afford to give myself away to Yulus and Nagi.

Burrowing into the sand, I stewed over how the guard had struck me casually, almost absently, as if I were some brainless, powerless, insignificant creature.

I hated it.

I hated him.

I hated how he was right, because no matter how smart I was, if I couldn't retaliate, then I couldn't inspire fear, and if I couldn't inspire fear, I couldn't inspire obedience, and if I couldn't inspire obedience, then, at the end of the day, I was no more than some poor, dumb beast. As one thought chased another, they spiraled down until they fixated on the guard's spear.

I wanted one.

Even if brute force had never been my modus operandi, even if a softshell turtle wielding a shrimp-sized spear didn't present any threat to Lord Silurus, I still wanted one. Possession of a weapon would give me the option of ambushing and stabbing that guard, and hence some measure of control. And at the very least, I could use it to prod eels into traps.

Yes. Getting my flippers on a spear was definitely a good idea.

Luckily, I knew where to find the barracks, because Nagi had complained about its location more than once. Through a historical agreement with a more competent captain who'd wrangled an even greater degree of independence, the barracks weren't inside the Black Sand Creek Water Court but a separate grotto a few yards downstream. The company of shrimp guards bunked there, and technically the captains too, although Captain Carpa spent as much time in the Water Court as possible and Captain Carpio practically lived in a round of his favorite pubs.

I spent two weeks observing the barracks until I'd memorized the guards' patterns. During the day, most went out to patrol the river, leaving behind two shrimp only: the senior one to drowse behind a desk, and the junior one to scuttle around taking care of odd jobs.

Perfect. Now all I had to do was sneak into the armory and steal myself a spear.

A/N 1: This one's for everyone who's been waiting eagerly for Piri to do a bit of aggressive karma winning. :)

A/N 2: Thanks to my awesome Patreon backers, BananaBobert, Celia, Charlotte, Hookshyu, Michael, Voligne, and Anonymous! And thanks to everyone for reading!
 
Hunh.
Well.
If it weren't for Piri being a turtle I'd think there would be something to her complaints about growing up taking too long.
As far as stealing that spear goes I imagine it'll work out, and Piri has plenty of time to get used to it before she outgrows it, but…
She has flippers right? And she's currently one of those turtles that extend their neck to catch stuff?…
How is she going to wield the thing?
 
Hunh.
Well.
If it weren't for Piri being a turtle I'd think there would be something to her complaints about growing up taking too long.
As far as stealing that spear goes I imagine it'll work out, and Piri has plenty of time to get used to it before she outgrows it, but…
She has flippers right? And she's currently one of those turtles that extend their neck to catch stuff?…
How is she going to wield the thing?

Yep, she has flippers and a mouth, and by Heaven, she will find a way to use them!
 
I wonder when that stolen spear will be noticed.

At the right time, that senior guard might end up getting in trouble. And hilariously it might end up improving security. With the hilarity that Piri literally stealing something was rewarded with more positive karma. Actually, maybe it ends up with a certain soul live longer than usual? Which, in turn ends up increasing the future average length of life for all future incarnations of that soul. Done completely by accident on Piri's part.
 
Hunh.
Well.
If it weren't for Piri being a turtle I'd think there would be something to her complaints about growing up taking too long.
As far as stealing that spear goes I imagine it'll work out, and Piri has plenty of time to get used to it before she outgrows it, but…
She has flippers right? And she's currently one of those turtles that extend their neck to catch stuff?…
How is she going to wield the thing?
Yep, she has flippers and a mouth, and by Heaven, she will find a way to use them!
Turtles can dig so perhaps she can make a punji trap or something similar.
 
I wonder when that stolen spear will be noticed.

At the right time, that senior guard might end up getting in trouble. And hilariously it might end up improving security. With the hilarity that Piri literally stealing something was rewarded with more positive karma. Actually, maybe it ends up with a certain soul live longer than usual? Which, in turn ends up increasing the future average length of life for all future incarnations of that soul. Done completely by accident on Piri's part.

Hmm, that's a good idea! I'll have to keep it in mind. :)

Turtles can dig so perhaps she can make a punji trap or something similar.

You'll see how she gets the spear! The method was inspired by a story from a friend's mandatory military service. I swear, sometimes real life is a lot weirder than anything you can make up. :p
 
Chapter 24: Lord Silurus, Take Two
Chapter 24: Lord Silurus, Take Two

Back when I was Prime Minister, I'd noticed that Sericans – especially Sericans who lacked power – often sighed, "Humans' plans can't compare to Heaven's plans" when something (or someone) scuttled their hopes.

Like that time Cassius' Grand Marshal tried to appoint his own son-in-law to lead an expedition against bandits, but I upset his meticulous scheming via dream interpretation. I'd had nothing against the Grand Marshal or his son-in-law, really – they were bland, unobjectionable courtiers – but I'd wanted to make the point that as Prime Minister, I controlled the military. Conveniently, Cassius happened to dream about a white-clad, halberd-wielding hero who fought off a demon and then leaped into a dragon's mouth. So I'd explained to a rapt court that the prophecy pointed to a different young general, one who wore white (albeit not more often than anyone else), fought with a halberd (albeit not better than anyone else), and hailed from Dragon's Gate in the east. That last point clinched my argument, the Grand Marshal conceded with a muttered, "Humans' plans…," and I reveled in my victory.

Now, however – now I was starting to understand the sentiment behind the saying. And I didn't like it one bit.

Because Captains Carpa and Carpio had chosen today to conduct an inspection of the barracks. Today – of all days! After weeks of inactivity! They just had to pick the one day that I'd already picked to raid their armory!

When I glided up to the barracks and glanced inside, expecting the usual still darkness and the lone shrimp drowsing at the duty desk, I saw a frenzy of antennae instead. Standing on his chair and waving his front legs, the shrimp sergeant was barking, "Make the bunks! Polish the armor! Sweep the floors!"

The smallest shrimp, perhaps a new recruit, scurried for a broom and starting whisking at the bits of eelgrass and reeds and other debris that the currents had scattered across the packed-earth floor. Other guards dashed deep into the grotto, presumably to straighten the dorms and polish the armor.

"Count the spears! Report the inventory to me!"

Nooooooo! I flapped all four flippers in distress. No no no! I needed a spear! Now how was I supposed to steal one? How long would the inspection take? How long would it take the guards to settle back into their lax routine? When would I have another chance to sneak in? I should have come yesterday! Even half a day ago would have been fine! Why, oh why, had I put it off until now?

And seriously – an inspection? Who needed inspections? And why did the captains have to run one on precisely the day I needed to get into the barracks? It was just not fair. Paddling with choppy, angry strokes, I started to storm off.

That was when I heard voices drifting out of a side tunnel, so small it hadn't rated a door. Slowing, I eavesdropped.

" – have two more spears than the last inventory. If we report that, Sarge will get mad at us for counting wrong last time." That sounded like an older guard, a veteran of past inspections.

"Did we order any new spears since the last count?" asked another.

"No. Someone counted wrong."

"I did not!" chittered an indignant, youthful voice. "I counted three times!"

A crack, like an antenna striking shell. A yelp.

"What do we do now?" asked the second guard.

A long, pondering silence.

"Can we, uh, hide them somewhere?" suggested the mathematically-challenged shrimp. "Like, under a bunk?"

"During an inspection? Are you crazy?"

"Well…."

Another long silence. The darkness inside the tunnel stirred, and out of the hole poked a shrimp's head, swiveling right and left. It vanished, to be replaced by a smaller one. This junior shrimp scurried out carrying two spears, which it tossed behind the garbage heap. Then it hurried back inside. Three sets of feet pattered away down the tunnel.

For a moment, I was too stunned to move. Had the guards just thrown away two perfectly good spears because they couldn't count? Not even under my rule had the military achieved such heights of incompetence! My first, mad instinct was to swim straight to the Water Court and report it to Yulus.

Insanity. Why would I do that? Here were two free spears! And I hadn't even had to burglarize the armory for them! Ah, truly the Heavens provided!

Gliding over to the garbage heap, I examined them. They looked identical, so I scooped them both up, curved a flipper around them, and swam off, buoyed by the memory of the guards' boundless ingenuity.

After that, I practiced using the spears. Flippers weren't meant for gripping, any more than spears were designed to be wielded by mouth, but I learned to hold the butt between my jaws, support the shaft with my front flippers, and flick my neck. That gave me enough control over the spearhead to prick and herd my targets. And when all else failed, I simply hurtled at the fish like a battering ram. Startled, they'd dart out of the way, and if I'd positioned both them and myself properly, they'd streak straight into a net.

Ahhhh. So satisfying.

Too bad I didn't dare try it on the shrimp guards, especially that big bully. If I failed to get them caught by humans, they'd report the incident to Yulus and Nagi, who'd open an investigation into this weapon-wielding, unawakened turtle. Even if I succeeded, Yulus and Nagi would still open an investigation into why their guards kept going missing, and eventually something would lead them to me.

Ah, well. Even if I couldn't get revenge, at least I could console myself with positive karma. That would have to do for now.

One day, as I maneuvered an eel into a trap, the long, narrow, almost throat-like basket gave me a flash of genius. It was true that the spearhead couldn't hurt Lord Silurus from the outside – but how about from the inside? I could let him swallow me and then either wedge myself in his throat until he choked to death, or swim around shredding his internal organs! Those were sure to be softer than his hide.

Yes. I liked this plan.

Since I couldn't afford to have any witnesses, I added surveying Lord Silurus' stretch of river to my daily routine. Luckily, the spirits were all giving the demon a wide berth, and the humans' pathetically short memories weren't so pathetically short that they'd started trickling back to his territory. Except for insignificant mortal creatures, I'd have the demon to myself.

Now it was time to confront Lord Silurus again.

After some thought, I wedged one of the spears into a crevice to hide it from casual inspection. Realistically, I wasn't getting out of the demon alive, but if Glitter reincarnated me in Black Sand Creek again, which seemed likely, I could come back for the weapon.

Flippers trembling, I picked up the other spear and approached the cave. It lay black and still and somehow expectant, as it had for all the days of my surveillance.

Edging up to the opening, I peeked around a stone. Lord Silurus? Lord Silurus –

"Ave, daemon, moritura te salutat" popped into my mind, and I smiled a little, remembering.

"Hail, demon, she who is about to die salutes you." It had been one of Aurelia's ladies-in-waiting who'd said that, right before the guards pushed her into a pit of vipers and scorpions. Like I'd said, Cassius and I had favored methods other than the Burning Pillar for executing women. (Sadly, I'd been pretending not to be a demon, so feeding them to me had not been an option.)

Still smiling, I called into the cave again, Lord Silurus? Are you home?

No answer.

Maybe he was sleeping. Should I swim in and brave whatever traps he might have set? Or come back and try again tomorrow? I waffled, batting my three free flippers and bobbing up and down.

No. No, she who was about to die did not want to put it off any longer.

Lord Silurus! I yelled. I need to talk to you!

One second, the hole gaped emptily. The next, waves burst out of it, battering me and tumbling me head over shell. Up rose a mountain with blood-red eyes and whip-like whiskers.

"WHO SPEAKS?"

Just like last time, the bellow vibrated my very bones.

Keeping a firm grip on my spear, I righted myself. I do, I declared, and swam up right in front of his face. His eyes crossed as he focused on me.

"IT'S YOU AGAIN! THAT SUICIDAL MIDGET! WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM LORD SILURUS THIS TIME?"

Well, I was about to die anyway. Couldn't hurt to tell him the truth. I want you to stop eating humans.

He exploded into laughter, waves blasting from his mouth. I flailed my flippers and fought to stay in place.

When he finally calmed down, he asked, "WHY WOULD LORD SILURUS DO THAT, LITTLE TURTLE?"

Because I'll kill you if you don't.

I expected more laughter, but he simply lunged, jaws wide. With one hard stroke of my flippers, I shot at his mouth, straining to make it past his teeth before he bit down. Swimming with only three flippers, I was off-balance and awkward, but I didn't have time to shift the spear to my mouth. His jaws were closing – gleaming steel points jutted down above me and rose up to meet me – the inside of his mouth was getting darker – and then I was through.

Behind me, his teeth slammed shut and ground against each other.

I took a moment to transfer the spear to my mouth before I swam forward. Although I couldn't see anything in the darkness, I kept the horrible metallic screeching behind me, and that worked well enough as an anti-compass. Soon enough, his jaws reopened, letting in murky light and a torrent of water. Hanging onto my spear, I let it carry me into a vast, cavernous space.

Funny, shouldn't his throat be narrower than this? Well, I guessed I wouldn't be jamming myself in and choking him to death.

Even more oddly, bars of light lit the cavern from both sides up ahead, falling between long rows of what looked like – shelves maybe? What was this, a warehouse? Why would a demon carry around a warehouse inside him?

As the current started to curve towards the shelves, I suddenly realized what they were. Gills! They were gills! Of course! Silly me – fish didn't have lungs or windpipes. Gills were how they breathed!

Should I attack them? Could I destroy them and suffocate him? That might not be a bad option.

But as the water pulled me closer, I saw the problem: The gills were spaced so far apart that I'd be swept right between them and end up outside the demon again! Clenching my jaws around the spear, I paddled furiously, straining to keep going straight. Even so, I was drifting sideways – I could tell I was drifting sideways – but if I could just stay far enough inside that I missed the last gill –

I bumped into it. The water swirled and tugged at my shell, but I braced my back flippers against the gill and kicked off as hard as I could. I shot away from it, cutting through the water, and then I was out of the current and gliding down his throat.

Whew! That was close. Gills in a fish – who'd have thought? Maybe studying natural philosophy did have its advantages.

But whatever. Now it was time for some stabbing. Using my mouth and flippers the way I did when I herded fish, I thrust the spear at his throat lining.

It bounced off. The demon didn't so much as twitch.

Hmmm. Backing up, I charged forward and rammed the spear into the lining. This time, the spearhead pierced it and stuck. Then it started to roil up and down, as if Lord Silurus were trying to swallow a fish bone. Better.

Backpedaling, I yanked the spear free and then drove it in again, trying to puncture his throat.

Everything moved from side to side, as if he were shaking his head.

Clamping the spear in my jaws, I gave a hard stroke of my flippers and shot down, dragging the point through the lining.

His throat convulsed harder, nearly shaking me loose. Then water roared in from his mouth and slammed me all the way into cavern full of acid.

Ow! Ow!

Stomach acid hurt! I could feel it eating away at me. I had to kill him before he digested me!

Stabbing the spearhead into his stomach, I raked the point along it. Although the lining parted, no tang of blood filled the liquids around me.

Not deep enough! Yanking the spear out, I rammed his stomach even harder, driving the point in as far as I could and then dragging it sideways. Still no blood.

Why wasn't this working? How thick was his stomach lining? Every bit of exposed flesh and shell was screaming in pain. I was running out of time. Desperate, I stabbed at the same spot over and over, trying to punch a hole through it.

But I was dissolving. My skin was gone. My shell was gone. My muscles were turning into goop.

Howling, I shoved the spear forward one final time before my consciousness melted into nothing.

A/N 1: Sooo, the beginning of this chapter was inspired by my friend's story from mandatory military service. It was a bunch of college-age guys who really didn't want to be there. There were periodic inspections, before which the soldiers had to count the guns. One time, they counted and found too many guns. Their solution? Take the extras and chuck them into a nearby lake. The next time inspection rolled around, they counted and realized they didn't have enough guns! So they made props and put them in the very back...and got away with it. Sometimes real life is weirder and funnier than anything I can make up.

A/N 2: Thanks to my awesome Patreon backers, BananaBobert, Celia, Charlotte, Hookshyu, Michael, Voligne, and Anonymous! Thanks to everyone for reading!
 
Okay-props to that maid, she sounds cool.
As for Piri...Well, good try but unfortunately I don't think you actually wounded Silurus all that much, unfortunately. Not enough to cause lasting damage, I imagine...
If she winds up a turtle again, she should try practicing with the spear, get her form back in shape, then try to join the Shrimp gaurd and get some real practice with the thing...
But I suspect what Piri should probably do is wait to grow bigger.
Like, practice with the stolen spear, but also grow up so she's not having to punch up so much in terms of her weight class, to say nothing of spiritual weight/power, which I suspect is a thing she CAN do, but the problem is she's not living long enough lives to really get that natural philsophy going to the point of developing a shell of steel that can resist acid, for example.
 
Okay-props to that maid, she sounds cool.

Yep, she was brave enough to stand up to Piri, which was why she had to go!

As for Piri...Well, good try but unfortunately I don't think you actually wounded Silurus all that much, unfortunately. Not enough to cause lasting damage, I imagine...

It's hard to hurt a catfish demon when you're a tiny turtle, unfortunately.

If she winds up a turtle again, she should try practicing with the spear, get her form back in shape, then try to join the Shrimp gaurd and get some real practice with the thing...
But I suspect what Piri should probably do is wait to grow bigger.
Like, practice with the stolen spear, but also grow up so she's not having to punch up so much in terms of her weight class, to say nothing of spiritual weight/power, which I suspect is a thing she CAN do, but the problem is she's not living long enough lives to really get that natural philsophy going to the point of developing a shell of steel that can resist acid, for example.

Yeah, if she had the patience to wait and survive for a hundred years, she could become a turtle spirit and start developing magical abilities. Unfortunately, she's determined to become a fox spirit, not a turtle spirit, so she has no intention of waiting.
 
Hmm, is it actually possible for a spirit to 'change' what type/animal spirit they are? Or is it locked into place until death/reincarnation once achieved? Because I can somewhat imagine Piri managing (by accident, or because she was distracted) reaching the age required and becoming a spirit. And she puts forth the effort into getting a human form, and then trying to get her fox form back from there. As for how she'd manage to miss reaching that hundred year survival mark, maybe she was working on a very involved project, and she's this close to getting the karma for being able to be a fox again. And well, if she went out in a blaze of glory her project might end up getting left undone and the karma she'd get wouldn't happen. Along with the possibility of actually losing karma because it was at a point where her dying and leaving it unfinished results in a lot of bad effects. Either from people stopping work wrongly, or just by looting the resources gathered/grifting. Like a plan to provide irrigation to fields ends up getting broken and instead the infrastructure needed to support it wasn't done. But the work to redirect the water was, so now the fields are flooded.

There's also the possibility of Piri overshooting the 'tier' for her becoming a fox again. Either by doing a big enough deed that her karma overshot it, or that she was just assigned different animals to be while she was in that tier. Although it would be kind of amusing if it turns out she ends up finding a form that she likes better than being a fox.
 
Hmm, is it actually possible for a spirit to 'change' what type/animal spirit they are? Or is it locked into place until death/reincarnation once achieved? Because I can somewhat imagine Piri managing (by accident, or because she was distracted) reaching the age required and becoming a spirit. And she puts forth the effort into getting a human form, and then trying to get her fox form back from there.

Hmm, I was picturing the spirits being locked into place until they die and get reincarnated. An animal would live to a hundred and awaken as a spirit. Then, as long as it doesn't get killed, it can develop magical abilities including the ability to modify its basic form (e.g. grow more tails or turn into a human).

As for how she'd manage to miss reaching that hundred year survival mark, maybe she was working on a very involved project, and she's this close to getting the karma for being able to be a fox again. And well, if she went out in a blaze of glory her project might end up getting left undone and the karma she'd get wouldn't happen. Along with the possibility of actually losing karma because it was at a point where her dying and leaving it unfinished results in a lot of bad effects. Either from people stopping work wrongly, or just by looting the resources gathered/grifting. Like a plan to provide irrigation to fields ends up getting broken and instead the infrastructure needed to support it wasn't done. But the work to redirect the water was, so now the fields are flooded.

Haha, I can see that happening too! She'd be so upset and probably debate whether it would be worth it to get herself killed so she can maybe reincarnate as a fox the next time.

There's also the possibility of Piri overshooting the 'tier' for her becoming a fox again. Either by doing a big enough deed that her karma overshot it, or that she was just assigned different animals to be while she was in that tier. Although it would be kind of amusing if it turns out she ends up finding a form that she likes better than being a fox.

Yeah, Glitter will certainly assign her to be a bunch of non-fox animals when she eventually reaches Black Tier. I can see her finding a form that she likes a lot and refusing to admit that she likes it better than being a fox!
 
Although Piri would certainly, if she found herself in such a situation as to becoming human before ever getting a fox incarnation, figure out a reverse of the 'human form' to turn back into a fox. Would be kind of funny if she kept attempting it, because she kept getting different alternate forms than 'fox'. (Whereas everyone else stopped due to having already obtained 'human form', or just wasn't that interested in either adding a different form, or just plain liked the sole form they got.)

And Piri ending up staying in human form most of the time because 'hands are useful'.

Well, it could be worse, if Piri finds out that there's a tier that lets her be multiple foxes at once. Probably limited by distance or somesuch, where they can't get too far from each other.

"Oh heavens, there's three of her now."
 
Although Piri would certainly, if she found herself in such a situation as to becoming human before ever getting a fox incarnation, figure out a reverse of the 'human form' to turn back into a fox. Would be kind of funny if she kept attempting it, because she kept getting different alternate forms than 'fox'. (Whereas everyone else stopped due to having already obtained 'human form', or just wasn't that interested in either adding a different form, or just plain liked the sole form they got.)

And Piri ending up staying in human form most of the time because 'hands are useful'.

Yeah, I can see Piri devoting her life to figuring out how to transform into a fox if she somehow reincarnated as a human. While all the other animal spirits are celebrating finally being to take human form!

Well, it could be worse, if Piri finds out that there's a tier that lets her be multiple foxes at once. Probably limited by distance or somesuch, where they can't get too far from each other.

"Oh heavens, there's three of her now."

That is definitely the right response to there being three Piris!
 
The Map of Serica According to Piri
It's time for a map of Serica! Piri has marked its most important features: where you can find fine foods and luxury goods. And, of course, the location of her beloved pagoda. What more could anyone want to know about a place?


View: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1KpNWft_0KgnDpg8mAo3bEyhK5TyOLJmA/view?usp=sharing

If the image doesn't show up, you can see it here.

Huh. I didn't expect it to be an island. What kind of scale are we talking about here? Australia-ish?
 
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