Mystical Mechanistics Of Outrageous Fortune [Mili-Moe Magical Mechagirl Yuri Quest]

[ColdGoldLazarus]

You decide to hurry up and finish eating fast, no distractions; the last thing you want is to be late on your first day. Devora finishes shortly before you do, and you wind up unwittingly trailing her as you head out. When you step outside again, the sun has risen; together with the slowly dissipating fog, it serves to bathe everything in a soothing golden shade as you make your way to the administrative building. Stepping inside, you find Smith (surprisingly awake) at his desk; he glances up from his paperwork just long enough to nod toward the side door by the stairs.

The meeting room is as you remember briefly seeing it the night previous, with a long oval table in the middle, a board at the far end, and a pair of large windows along the west wall, looking out over the hillside. The difference is that it's now populated with a variety of young women, thirteen seated around the table while Nasira and Victoria remain standing up by the board. The former looks impatient, while the latter seems like she would rather be anywhere else. No wonder Devora seemed more upbeat today.

As your group enters, Nasira's expression relaxes a touch. "There you five are. All five? Yes, good, please take a seat." You do so, and she glances about, tapping her thigh as she does a headcount. "Alright, Mandrivnyk should be down in the hangar preparing, but everyone else seems to be present. Excellent."

She lets out a deep breath, tension draining away, and then straightens back up with a more friendly smile. "Klementia, Luciole, Volkov, Desjardins, and Polinski, welcome." You suddenly realize everyone else at the table is staring at the five of you, and resist the urge to sink down in your seat. Nasira continues her speech.

"As members of the Advanced Service, you'll have a lot to keep track of compared to the rest. That's part of why we brought you out here early relative to the Ninth-Rank recruits, to give you the time to acclimatize to the basics before you're expected to carry the further responsibilities of your station." Victoria looks like she wants to interject something here, but thinks twice of it and keeps her head down. "For now, though, the main purpose of this meeting is to go over some rules and what to expect for the next few days." She pauses a moment, smile growing bigger. "And more immediately, this is also a chance to get to know everyone. With a few exceptions..."

She trails off for a split-second, her eyes flicking to the open door. You turn to look, and see silvery-white locks fluttering, vanishing past the opening and up the staircase. Your heart beats, and somehow you just know who that was.

The moment ends, and Nasira resumes as if nothing had happened. "Everyone else is here, so feel free to take a few minutes, stand up, talk a bit. At the half-hour mark, we'll get down to business." With that, everyone slowly gets out of their seats and moves around a bit, to mingle.

It Was Her
> Go After Her! Soon as you get the chance, slip out and head upstairs, see if you can talk to her.
> You're Not Ready! Stay here, meet some people, let yourself calm down.

 

[ColdGoldLazarus]

Your heart's racing, beating in your chest so fast you're afraid it might explode, and you're tensed up like a spring. You sit frozen in place, unable to breathe, and you realize you're not ready to face her, not like this.

So you focus on calming down; take deep breaths, relax your muscles, will your heart to slow. Your surroundings fade slightly, and soon enough you've almost managed to forget what it was you were so concerned about in the first place.

"Hey, you okay there?" You jump a bit, startled, and look up to see one of the women you haven't met yet is leaning over the table across from you. She's got light green hair in a shade not far off from Elaine's, and bright yellow eyes that make you think of a cat, paired with her strange expression of half-concern, half-mischief. She's wearing a long black jacket over a white pinstriped dress shirt, and a pleated skirt over thighhighs in the same colors, but despite the professional look it should be giving off, it somehow just feels untidy, even though you can't find anything directly amiss. She's a strange one, you can tell.

"Huh? Sorry, I kind of... spaced out there," you say, glancing fruitlessly back at the doorway. You missed this chance, but maybe that's for the best; hopefully you'll get the opportunity to try again soon. For now, you decide, you'll focus on the immediate situation. "So... what's up?"

The woman grins, taking a seat and offering a hand to shake. "Well, you looked a bit shy or something, so I thought I'd come say hello. What's your name?"

"Ah, Alexandra. Alexandra Polinski. And you?"

She nods at this. "That's a pretty name. And you can call me Leslie Severin. It's a pleasure to meet you! I'm a Third-rank; not quite on top, but been around long enough to tell what's what." She nods again, biting her lip, and adds "Here's the big tips: Don't bother Beatrice when she's holed herself up for a few days, don't get between Nasira and Victoria when they're fighting, and whatever you do, do not eve-"

"Ah, Leslie. Corrupting young minds again, I see." She's abruptly interrupted as another woman sits down beside her, smacking her lightly across the back of the head. "Bad Leslie, stay down." Despite the jocular tone, she's got the greenette fixed with a strangely intense gaze, making you wonder if it was as much a joke as it seemed at first.

"I didn't even say anything!" Leslie pouts, crossing her arms and looking away. "We literally just introduced ourselves."

"I somehow doubt that." The newcomer says coldly, before turning to you. "Chayka Lorelei, Third-rank. An additional tip to living well here: Don't trust a word this one says." Leslie huffs at this, expression half-irritated, half-resigned - she seems genuinely upset at the accusation, but says nothing to dispute it.

Chayka's expression softens a bit. "So you're Polinski? Always nice to have someone from the south. From what I understand you're a hard worker, so I look forward to seeing what you can do." Chayka is more... relaxing to look at, for lack of a better word. Her soft seafoam hair rests in a gracefully messy mop with long twin braids down her back, and she wears a very long, wispy white cardigan with aqua wave patterns stitched along the bottom, over a simple velvety grey dress and long boots. She's got her fingers steepled, and looks at you over them with a slight head tilt. "No need to be shy; if you have any questions, feel free to ask."

What To Say? (Can choose multiple)
> Ask about the people
-> Everyone in general
-> Someone in particular (Specify)
> Ask about the war
> Ask about the base
-> The ranks
-> The schedule
> Other/Write-In

---

Spent a day or two just agonizing over the choices here, but wound up not changing much. Hopefully this isn't too horrible, but it still felt too limiting somehow...
Also, added Leslie and Chayka to the character sheet. I'll be honest, there are a few others I've been looking forward to introducing almost as much as Anastasia, and these two are among them.

 

[ColdGoldLazarus]

Okay, update has wound up going really long, so I've got it saved in a google doc and have been working through it when I can. Things should go smoother now that finals are over, too.

But this post isn't about that.

That "I don't know what I'm doing" tag up top? That isn't there just for the memes, it's a genuine expression of my feelings as QM. Like, story-wise I'm fine; got notes on all the characters, some possible events later down the line, and a general sense of what's up in a way that isn't too open-ended or too restrictive, I would hope.

But regardless, I feel like I'm handling this quest really poorly on some level, and I've been trying to figure out why that is and how to fix it. Part of this is because of what was brought up in the "SV has an odd problem" thread, and part of it is because of the weirdly sexual tone I set early on with a particular option, when we were deciding on Alexandra's looks. You know the one. I brought this up in a discord chat, but I figured here might be a better place since... you know... this is the actual quest thread. One thing that was pointed out was that despite ostensibly being eighteen, Alexandra feels like more of a teenager than a young adult, and on rereading the threadmarks thus far, I'm getting that feeling as well. I'm not sure why that is, but it's definitely there, and definitely needs to be fixed.

So yeah, basically, I wanted to go ahead and open a discussion on some of the missteps this quest has had so far, particularly in terms of overall tone and treatment of the characters, (though if anyone has suggestions on other aspects, feel free to throw those in as well) and how I might go about fixing them.

 

[ColdGoldLazarus]

So, I have bad news and good news.

The bad news is that plans changed, and this quest is now officially cancelled. I'm sorry about that, but I just felt that trying to build off a foundation this shaky wasn't worth it.

The good news is that I'm rebooting it! You can find the new thread here. Enjoy!