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Loyalty or No SV you Are the Daedra

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[X] "what have you never seen anyone train before? Really, you people are so rude!"
-[X] go back to practicing our basic swing Start The swings slow and speed up once you've got the movement down.
--[X] once your sure that you've got the basics down, practice a combo attack against the Demon Tree.
 
Note to self: pay more fookin' attention!

[X] Please direct all enquiries to the facepalming elf.
 
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Demon Tree get's its Revenge!
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    • "Please direct any inquiries to the face-palming elf. And what? Have you never seen anyone train before? Really you people are so rude." You say in your best impersonation of a saccharine sweet, butter wouldn't melt in their mouth receptionist who would really like you to stop bothering them. It sounds surprisingly pleasant in the tones of your crystal grinding voice.

    "You ba-" you can guess what she was about to say but you never actually hear it over the sudden shouts of the inn's patrons. Humming to yourself, more eye of the tiger, you start back towards the tree that stole your sword. It deserves a beating for that and it'll help you with your skill with a blade. Yay!

    Your walk decapitates a couple of plants, you aren't sure what kind they are only that they have kinda pretty purple flowers. Finally the tree comes into view. It looks exactly like all the others, silver barked, tall with delicate little leaves. The only distinguishing feature is the deep gash leaking sap down the silver barked trunk. At last, you will have your revenge!

    The Eye of the Tiger intensifies in your head and you flourish your sword manfully at the tree. It shows no sign of fear or remorse. With a manly war cry, which is totally not the highest note of Eye of the Tiger, you slash your blade at it over and over again, getting used to the swing, the weight and speeding up until it feels like your blade is a mere crystalline blur in the air.

    You are the fastest, the most amazing, the....

    There's a sound of groaning wood and the trees starts to list dangerously. The trunk is barely more than a pale mess of wood chips and splinters. Maybe you should have thought this through a little more?

    You step smartly out of the way and someone behind you lets out an earsplitting scream. You turn just in time to see the elf who summoned you narrowly avoid being brained by a tree branch by falling on her arse. That wasn't a cool as your dodge but at least she's alright and....

    "You clumsy, impudent, failure of a daedra!" She shouts at you. "I told you to stop the Divines damned singing and you won't, now you try and drop a tree on me! You'd be more useful to me as a soul gem!"

    Well that's just rude.

    [ ] What do now?
     
  • Threadmarks
    • [X] Give me a task, fool summoner, Lest I continue to do random shit. My constituents grow restless.
     
    [X] "You want to risk summoning above your level again? Because I'm really not the worst you could get with a fucked up spell. At least I'm willing to listen and try to help. More likely you summon a very nasty unbound Deadra. And then you just become a pile of ash in the breeze."
     
    [X] Well unfortunately for you, I'm controlled by a hivemind of idiots, with my actions success depending on the values of literal dice.
    -[X] Sometimes I'll almost crush you with a tree. Other times I'll literally be able to get in a fist fight with a god and win.
    --[X] Or the simple version you could go with is that Sheogorath wishes he had my ability to cause chaos.
     
    [X] "Soooo, are we going to actualy kill some Dark Brotherhood tonight? Because I'm getting the feeling you misunderstood the whole concept of 'summon a daedra to killl your enemies for you', which is a pretty straightforward concept."
     
    [X] Well unfortunately for you, I'm controlled by a hivemind of idiots, with my actions success depending on the values of literal dice.
    -[X] Sometimes I'll almost crush you with a tree. Other times I'll literally be able to get in a fist fight with a god and win.
    [X] No seriously we fist fought a God It was as epic as it sounds
    --[X] Or the simple version you could go with is that Sheogorath wishes he had my ability to cause chaos.
    [X] Now do you have a general direction of the brother hood? If you don't I think i recall where their base is located If I recall correctly one of their main safe houses is in the basement of an abandoned house in Cheydinhal.
    [X]But I'm going to need to grind up a few levels first before i take on their entire stronghold by myself.
    ​
     
    [X] "You want to risk summoning above your level again? Because I'm really not the worst you could get with a fucked up spell. At least I'm willing to listen and try to help. More likely you summon a very nasty unbound Deadra. And then you just become a pile of ash in the breeze."
    -[X] "At least right now you have me, who's only disfunction is being controlled by a hivemind of idiots, with my actions success depending on the values of literal dice."
    --[X] "Sometimes I'll almost crush you with a tree. Other times I'll literally be able to get in a fist fight with a god and win."
    ---[X] "Or the simple version you could go with is that Sheogorath wishes he had my ability to cause chaos."
    ----[X] "And not to mention all this bonus knowledge we grace you with between bursts of insanity!"
     
    Omake: Unclad Daedra​

    "I told you to stop the Divines damned singing and you won't, now you try and drop a tree on me! You'd be more useful to me as a soul gem!"

    You shrug, to the sound of crystal grating on crystal, and reply "I can't really fathom how a soul gem could have saved you from the bandit sorceress earlier. Let's be frank here: I am anything but the worst you could have ended up summoning with a spell beyond your power and understanding."

    "Really?" Asks your summoner, outrage writ large on her features. "Because I am having trouble picturing anything worse than... whatever you are... right now!"

    You tilt your helmeted head. "Summoning above your mastery is a dangerous business. If you weren't lucky, you would have summoned an unbound daedra, or worse, you could have summoned an unclad daedra!"

    "What?" Asks your summoner, her anger suddenly transmuted into jncomprehension. "Is that... a thing that happens!?"

    "Oh yes!" You assure her. "You have no idea how lucky you are to have me! Imagine what would have happened if you had a cidentally summoned an unclad Xilivai! Picture it! A hulking figure in perfectly chiselled, muscular ebon flesh, piercing red eyes that look directly into your soul, every inch exposed and moving with a fluid feline grace- Does the image not fill you with dread?!"

    Coming out of your tirade and regarding her, you blink in surprise to see her blushing and looking dreamily off to one side, a faint smile about her lips.

    Frowning under your helmet, you repeat yourself a touch louder. "I said: Does that not fill you with dread?!"

    Snapping out of it, she turns back to you, saying "Oh, yes, sure. Totally. Completely and utterly filled... With dread, yes."

    "Are you sure?" You ask, in tones of confusion. "I didn't know that blushes were a sign of mortal dread."

    She blushes even harder at that, turning a deep crimson. "Shut up! Stupid daedra, what do you know about human emotions?"

    "Less than I thought, it seems." You admit. "So being asked about your blushes fills you with dread?"

    She starts to reply with something biting, but cuts herself off and thinks for a moment, before replying in a calmer voice. "Actually, yeah, it kinda does."

    "Ah, so that explains it." You say happily, and the two of you fall silent for a while.

    "So what were we doing again?

    ++++++++++++++++++
    I was suddenly struck by an amusing image of how things might go down if the Knight of Order had made the "unclad daedra" comment, and decided to run with it.
     
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    Imma get @Verminlord1 to stick that into an index in his reserved posts. Or something. Hey V, do we have anything to reward funny Omakes with?
     
    [X] Blame Sheograth, the tree belonged to him.
    -[X] In fact... remember that statue I was talking about earlier? If you complete the ritual I was talking about, not only will you help the Emperor, it will help you get back at Sheogorath as well!
    --[X] why wouldn't I know anti-Mad God rituals? I'm an Order Daedra.
     
    Xyzarach said:
    [X] Blame Sheograth, the tree belonged to him.
    -[X] In fact... remember that statue I was talking about earlier? If you complete the ritual I was talking about, not only will you help the Emperor, it will help you get back at Sheogorath as well!
    --[X] why wouldn't I know anti-Mad God rituals? I'm an Order Daedra.
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    Sheogorath would kill us as soon as he could.... Can we please stay away from his shrines? I mean we are in the body of his atheisis
     
    Actually, bugger it, changing my vote:

    [X] "Oh yeah? Would a soul gem be able to tell you that the Dark Brotherhood's actions are co-ordinated by the ghost of a long-dead witch called the Night Mother whose continued existence depends on the integrity of her mortal remains? Would a soul gem. Be able to tell you that said remains are currently interred beneath the statue of the Lucky Old Lady in Bravil?"
    -[X] You would be kicking the hornet's nest by doing so, but you would be doing the Dark Brotherhood irreparable damage, and preventing them from using their current business model, which relies on prayers of vengeance to the Night Mother being heard, and her passing that information on to the brotherhood."

    Since we are officially SV lodged in the head of this daedra, why not leverage that?


    There is no superpower like OOC knowledge. (Even if it isn't technically such here.)
     
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    Skewfiend said:
    Actually, bugger it, changing my vote:

    [X] "Oh yeah? Would a soul gem be able to tell you that the Dark Brotherhood's actions are co-ordinated by the ghost of a long-dead witch called the Night Mother whose continued existence depends on the integrity of her mortal remains? Would a soul gem. Be able to tell you that said remains are currently interred beneath the statue of the Lucky Old Lady in Bravil?"
    -[X] You would be kicking the hornet's nest by doing so, but you would be doing the Dark Brotherhood irreparable damage, and preventing them from using their current business model, which relies on prayers of vengeance to the Night Mother being heard, and her passing that information on to the brotherhood."

    Since we are officially SV lodged in the head of this daedra, why not leverage that?


    There is no superpower like OOC knowledge. (Even if it isn't technically such here.)
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    We would most likely not be able to get in and well if Lucien is around we are Screwed over. We need to power level before we take the fight to the night mother
     
    Cjdavis103 said:
    Sheogorath would kill us as soon as he could.... Can we please stay away from his shrines? I mean we are in the body of his atheisis
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    But we hold great madness within us! Truly, who but a Madman would pray to a God that is the antithesis of his very being! Come, let us bring this impressionable young women before Him, and drive her to madness in His name!
     
    Xyzarach said:
    But we hold great madness within us! Truly, who but a Madman would pray to a God that is the antithesis of his very being! Come, let us bring this impressionable young women before Him, and drive her to madness in His name!
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    Except for the fact that he might think we would spread order and thus would smite us. Lets wait untill after we have caused a bunch of madness and leveled up repeatedly before we aproch him
     
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