It does not, one sin is mandatory and adds nothing to charismata limit
Knight of Wessex (A Written World Quest)
- Thread starter Alectai
- Start date
- Original Fantasy Alt. History
- Pronouns
- He/Him
You're right. Missed one somehow.
As stated you have one more Charisma (the singular of Charismata) than you should.
- Pronouns
- Reader
also, for those wondering Desmond means "Gracious Defender"
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Going back through looking for errors, I found one. This plan is also one Charisma too many. Your Charismata should always equal your Flaws +1. This is 5 Charismata and only 3 Flaws.
One of the Deadly Sins must be selected as a flaw.
More can be taken, but one is the minimum.
Alright, I'll add in another flaw real quick
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Cool. People who have already voted, bear the new Enemy flaw in mind.
This is correct. Everyone has at least one Sin.
Wizards Rule, Fool already has the Superbia Flaw, which is one of the Seven Deadly Sins.
Alectai
Speaks Words of Wisdom... On occasion
Alectai's 2 Hour Vibe Check
Prozilof's Plan: Hope of those who know the hunger
This plan's redlining a lot of things to aim for high performance. Temperance leads to Hama Talent, which does give some neato tricks if properly explored, and takes the Charismata of Hope (Mystery Box You Don't Know What It Does), Diligence , Reason , Wisdom , Patience, and Charity. It pays for these with Outsider, Avaritia, Gula, Branch Family, and Enemy. This is... Uh, a bold plan to say the least, which maximizes the External Flaws and takes two Sins to boot in order to take a build that is absolutely well geared to building up one heck of an estate once you get up to that point. On the other hand, Branch Family means you're poor and sneered on, Outsider means you're looked down on further, and Enemy means Someone wants you ruined, with most of the things that would keep them from getting a clear shot at you being unable to have a say in the matter, and no real bonuses to actually surviving if they decide to just go "Fuck it, I'll just walk in and kill them". If you ever have to separate from your Master for a time.
Avaritia and Gula are also a pretty dangerous combination. You accumulate resources beyond what you need, and use them to buy things you don't need, it's a nasty vicious cycle that can cause huge problems. Of course, you also have the Charismata necessary to make enough money to endure any lapses, while the insight aspects of Hama are likely to let you pinpoint good opportunities to make more, but Branch Family means you have uncomfortably little slack to work with and a very poor starting position.
It's doable, but it Will be very challenging, bear that in mind.
Guest99's "Wizards Rule, Fool"
Let me be plain. I don't want to write this character.
It's not because I don't like wizards or anything, I love Weird Magic Shit, the problem is that this character is just Quirky Random Shit packed in one place with "Being a quirky rando" the main draw. Hope is a mystery box that you took, Temperance is for your insight and Hama proficienc,y which yeah, fair enough. You've got Reason to give yourself solid administration, Diligence to make you a good leader, Wisdom to have keen perception, and Joy to just be an optimistic person who just doesn't get down by things. It's fine so far, a little scatterbrained but viable.
Then we get to the flaws and Hoo boy, this is where it all falls apart. Superbia because... Reasons I guess? Outsider because apparently nobody likes him for some reason? And then Tongue-Tied of all things, which makes me go "Why did you have Diligence, Wisdom, and Joy when you're going to basically give yourself a crit-failure chance on anything you say?"
You portray this as a quirky master wizard, but from my perspective, I just get Random Shenanigans and a character who's built to achieve a specific mechanical goal rather than to be a character, and worse, takes a combination of traits that makes them nigh incapable of interacting with any other character while actively sabotaging their very real strengths.
It's also one Charisma overspent, so (Shrug)
I can't really say this would be fun for me to write, and so I'd kindly ask you to redo this into something that makes sense, or I'd be inclined to veto it even if it won. Consider this fair warning.
Ulvlar's Just Ice
It's perfectly fine, conservative, but Pure Talent is powerful in itself, and Wisdom and Being Upbeat in general are good traits to have. Hope remains A Mystery which you're not going to get an answer for. I still don't know why Superbia is so popular though.
OneArmedYeti's Plan
Needs to add Outsider and add their freebie, another Superbia option, other than that, it's mostly Just Ice again with Diligence instead of Wisdom.
Tygerbright's Driven Wulf
Thank Fuck, someone picked something that wasn't Superbia! That aside, Valor + Diligence leads to a solid battlefield commander, though not exceptional in any one field, they have enough talent for cultivation to just hoover up Zeal and be a solid forward all rounder. No particular talents in actually running their manor and territory, but no overwhelming flaws either, and it's actually properly spent. Solid setup, no issues here.
Constenato's Demon-like Angel
Temperance Talent, which is fair enough, Charity and Joy make you a very popular person. You might get a little worked up in a fight and can get nasty if provoked, but all in all, this is a solid, workable character that's properly spent up. No issues here.
Flotter's Riding on a White Horse
Similar to Constenato's setup, but with a focus more on force of personality and battle effectiveness--which are both solid setups! Not sure why we're going with Outsider here, but it's perfectly viable. Not complaints here.
Meianmaru's The Beautiful Knight (And The Monster Within)
This is what I want to see when I see someone going with a heavy Flaw build! Fortitude + Valor + Diligence + Joy makes a superb front line Knight who could lead an army to hell with a smile on their face and prayers in their hearts, with Chastity + Wisdom giving you the appearance, demeanor, and percepton needed to identify potential threats and enemies while deflecting any accusations of impropriety. Then we get into the Flaws and we get a nasty wombo-combo of Superbia and Ira, but the focus on being a capable champion and general looks and perception means you've got a chance at spinning any lapses to mitigate the hits you might otherwise take from Sinning. Enemy is dangerous, yeah, but you've taken a very sturdy build that can likely weather anything they can slip past your Master and your Household, because Fortitude makes you Tanky as hell even disregarding its more subtle benefits that you'll have to find out on your own.
All in all, this is what I want to see from a complex, high Flaw/High Charismata build. A setup that creates an interesting, flawed character who nonetheless has great strengths to go hand in hand with them, rather than simply trying to grab a laundry list of perks you want while trying to game your flaws to make them not so bad. It straight up doesn't work.
That's everything that was posted by the time I started my assessment, I hope this gives you some insight on what kinds of characters we'd like to see!
Prozilof's Plan: Hope of those who know the hunger
Temperance
Hope
Diligence
Reason
Wisdom
Patience
Charity
Avaritia
Gula
Branch Family
Enemy
Outsider
Hope
Diligence
Reason
Wisdom
Patience
Charity
Avaritia
Gula
Branch Family
Enemy
Outsider
Avaritia and Gula are also a pretty dangerous combination. You accumulate resources beyond what you need, and use them to buy things you don't need, it's a nasty vicious cycle that can cause huge problems. Of course, you also have the Charismata necessary to make enough money to endure any lapses, while the insight aspects of Hama are likely to let you pinpoint good opportunities to make more, but Branch Family means you have uncomfortably little slack to work with and a very poor starting position.
It's doable, but it Will be very challenging, bear that in mind.
Guest99's "Wizards Rule, Fool"
Cynric (Male)
Temperance
Hope
Reason
Diligence
Wisdom
Joy
Superbia
-Outsider
Tongue-Tied
Temperance
Hope
Reason
Diligence
Wisdom
Joy
Superbia
-Outsider
Tongue-Tied
It's not because I don't like wizards or anything, I love Weird Magic Shit, the problem is that this character is just Quirky Random Shit packed in one place with "Being a quirky rando" the main draw. Hope is a mystery box that you took, Temperance is for your insight and Hama proficienc,y which yeah, fair enough. You've got Reason to give yourself solid administration, Diligence to make you a good leader, Wisdom to have keen perception, and Joy to just be an optimistic person who just doesn't get down by things. It's fine so far, a little scatterbrained but viable.
Then we get to the flaws and Hoo boy, this is where it all falls apart. Superbia because... Reasons I guess? Outsider because apparently nobody likes him for some reason? And then Tongue-Tied of all things, which makes me go "Why did you have Diligence, Wisdom, and Joy when you're going to basically give yourself a crit-failure chance on anything you say?"
You portray this as a quirky master wizard, but from my perspective, I just get Random Shenanigans and a character who's built to achieve a specific mechanical goal rather than to be a character, and worse, takes a combination of traits that makes them nigh incapable of interacting with any other character while actively sabotaging their very real strengths.
It's also one Charisma overspent, so (Shrug)
I can't really say this would be fun for me to write, and so I'd kindly ask you to redo this into something that makes sense, or I'd be inclined to veto it even if it won. Consider this fair warning.
Ulvlar's Just Ice
Cynewyn (Female)
Justice
Wisdom
Joy
Hope
Superbia
Outsider
Justice
Wisdom
Joy
Hope
Superbia
Outsider
It's perfectly fine, conservative, but Pure Talent is powerful in itself, and Wisdom and Being Upbeat in general are good traits to have. Hope remains A Mystery which you're not going to get an answer for. I still don't know why Superbia is so popular though.
OneArmedYeti's Plan
Justice
Hope
Diligence
Superbia
Hope
Diligence
Superbia
Needs to add Outsider and add their freebie, another Superbia option, other than that, it's mostly Just Ice again with Diligence instead of Wisdom.
Tygerbright's Driven Wulf
Justice
Valor
Diligence
Hope
Invidia
Outsider
Valor
Diligence
Hope
Invidia
Outsider
Thank Fuck, someone picked something that wasn't Superbia! That aside, Valor + Diligence leads to a solid battlefield commander, though not exceptional in any one field, they have enough talent for cultivation to just hoover up Zeal and be a solid forward all rounder. No particular talents in actually running their manor and territory, but no overwhelming flaws either, and it's actually properly spent. Solid setup, no issues here.
Constenato's Demon-like Angel
Temperance
Charity
Hope
Joy
Ira
Outsider
Charity
Hope
Joy
Ira
Outsider
Temperance Talent, which is fair enough, Charity and Joy make you a very popular person. You might get a little worked up in a fight and can get nasty if provoked, but all in all, this is a solid, workable character that's properly spent up. No issues here.
Flotter's Riding on a White Horse
Justice
Valor
Chastity
Charity
Ira
Outsider
Valor
Chastity
Charity
Ira
Outsider
Similar to Constenato's setup, but with a focus more on force of personality and battle effectiveness--which are both solid setups! Not sure why we're going with Outsider here, but it's perfectly viable. Not complaints here.
Meianmaru's The Beautiful Knight (And The Monster Within)
Fortitude
Valor
Chastity
Wisdom
Diligence
Joy
Superbia
Ira
Enemy
Outsider
Valor
Chastity
Wisdom
Diligence
Joy
Superbia
Ira
Enemy
Outsider
This is what I want to see when I see someone going with a heavy Flaw build! Fortitude + Valor + Diligence + Joy makes a superb front line Knight who could lead an army to hell with a smile on their face and prayers in their hearts, with Chastity + Wisdom giving you the appearance, demeanor, and percepton needed to identify potential threats and enemies while deflecting any accusations of impropriety. Then we get into the Flaws and we get a nasty wombo-combo of Superbia and Ira, but the focus on being a capable champion and general looks and perception means you've got a chance at spinning any lapses to mitigate the hits you might otherwise take from Sinning. Enemy is dangerous, yeah, but you've taken a very sturdy build that can likely weather anything they can slip past your Master and your Household, because Fortitude makes you Tanky as hell even disregarding its more subtle benefits that you'll have to find out on your own.
All in all, this is what I want to see from a complex, high Flaw/High Charismata build. A setup that creates an interesting, flawed character who nonetheless has great strengths to go hand in hand with them, rather than simply trying to grab a laundry list of perks you want while trying to game your flaws to make them not so bad. It straight up doesn't work.
That's everything that was posted by the time I started my assessment, I hope this gives you some insight on what kinds of characters we'd like to see!
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- Pronouns
- Reader
fixed. thanks for pointing that out.
Theaxofwar
Definitely not a Bunny Cat in disguise.
- Location
- Standing right behind you
[X] Plan: The Beautiful Knight (And The Monster Within)
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- Pronouns
- He/Him
This plan isn't overspent. Otherwise mostly agreed with the analysis.
[X] Plan: Ruat Caelum
-[X] Aesc (Female)
-[X] Justice
-[X] Wisdom
-[X] Diligence
-[X] Hope
-[X] Patience
-[X] Ira
-[X] Outsider
-[X] Branch Family
Honestly, deadass, I was hoping for a "gender ambiguous" option, but with how things are I guess We'll See lol
Jokes aside, I think that taking more than one Deadly Sin is a very dangerous game. One is already rough and difficult to work with, but more than that? They can synergize pretty easily. Greed and Envy? I want your stuff, why do you have stuff when I don't, etc. Wrath and Pride? Goes without saying. And then stacking more than that...
So I'm sticking with one Sin.
To be honest, I'm tired of not-well-spoken characters, or funny miscommunication, or so on and so forth. If we fail, we fail on our own merits, but words are important in Knightly society or otherwise. Being able to speak clearly and firmly when needed is important in every narrative, but especially when working within military structure or when serving those above you. The saying's that loose lips sink ships, and that can really be expanded. Words matter, it's not a free flaw. Each and every one is rough.
I decided not to take Mortal Enemy for that matter -- it's already tough enough in a Cultivation World. I'd rather save the "Junior You Dare?!" for later, we're going to be making enough enemies on our own. That being said, I took Outsider and Branch Family because I felt that was decent enough -- Female grabs Outsider, natch, and Branch Family is something I think it's livable to deal with. Social consequences are rough, but merit can deal with it, same for Outsider, I think. Hand-me-down resources are decent enough especially when taking Cultivation Talent.
Virtue and Charismata...
I like Justice. I like Knights that are Just. The plain benefits aside, Justice is good to keep in mind, being able to differentiate Right from Wrong is just good to have narratively. Taking Ira with this is... kind of interesting, because Righteous Wrath is definitely something that can go very wrong very fast, but I like the idea of someone who knows what is Right and what is Wrong and is just very angry about it. In a cultivation world, I feel there's a great many things that are unjust, and it's okay to be angry about it. It's just important to know when to reign it in.
I intentionally picked Hope but not Joy. I think it's okay to not be happy all the time. That's life. Sometimes things are shit, and there are many things to be sad about. You don't need to be happy to do What Needs To Be Done, you just need the willingness to just stand up straight, the courage to protect, and to hold true to the oaths you've sworn to God.
And I think that's the difference between Joy and Hope. Having Hope means you won't fall into despair, that the world is unfixable, that nothing will ever be okay again. Hope and Joy together are certainly very powerful, but I like the narrative of not being a beacon of Joy but still holding Hope deep in your heart all the time.
Wisdom, Patience, and Diligence just feel like very natural combos, especially for an outsider from a poorer family. You won't be easily lead astray, and you can take things at your own pace rather than feeling strong external pressure. You have your internal compass, and you know what's up. You'll stick with it. And Diligence, I feel, is just a good thing to have. Hard workers are nice, and it's a good motivator. Sometimes shoveling shit sucks, but you'll shovel it anyways.
Altogether, I think it's a solid narrative of a morally upright underdog who knows what needs to be done, and the willingness to do it anyways. It's a classic narrative, but hey, it's a good one, and honestly, you guys definitely wanted a character who was willing to cut through bullshit and drama and willing to do the dirty work when needed when reading, idk, Arthuriana or the Song of Roland, lol
Can't wait for someone to be utterly based and make a Delita Heiral build though--
-[X] Aesc (Female)
-[X] Justice
-[X] Wisdom
-[X] Diligence
-[X] Hope
-[X] Patience
-[X] Ira
-[X] Outsider
-[X] Branch Family
Honestly, deadass, I was hoping for a "gender ambiguous" option, but with how things are I guess We'll See lol
Jokes aside, I think that taking more than one Deadly Sin is a very dangerous game. One is already rough and difficult to work with, but more than that? They can synergize pretty easily. Greed and Envy? I want your stuff, why do you have stuff when I don't, etc. Wrath and Pride? Goes without saying. And then stacking more than that...
So I'm sticking with one Sin.
To be honest, I'm tired of not-well-spoken characters, or funny miscommunication, or so on and so forth. If we fail, we fail on our own merits, but words are important in Knightly society or otherwise. Being able to speak clearly and firmly when needed is important in every narrative, but especially when working within military structure or when serving those above you. The saying's that loose lips sink ships, and that can really be expanded. Words matter, it's not a free flaw. Each and every one is rough.
I decided not to take Mortal Enemy for that matter -- it's already tough enough in a Cultivation World. I'd rather save the "Junior You Dare?!" for later, we're going to be making enough enemies on our own. That being said, I took Outsider and Branch Family because I felt that was decent enough -- Female grabs Outsider, natch, and Branch Family is something I think it's livable to deal with. Social consequences are rough, but merit can deal with it, same for Outsider, I think. Hand-me-down resources are decent enough especially when taking Cultivation Talent.
Virtue and Charismata...
I like Justice. I like Knights that are Just. The plain benefits aside, Justice is good to keep in mind, being able to differentiate Right from Wrong is just good to have narratively. Taking Ira with this is... kind of interesting, because Righteous Wrath is definitely something that can go very wrong very fast, but I like the idea of someone who knows what is Right and what is Wrong and is just very angry about it. In a cultivation world, I feel there's a great many things that are unjust, and it's okay to be angry about it. It's just important to know when to reign it in.
I intentionally picked Hope but not Joy. I think it's okay to not be happy all the time. That's life. Sometimes things are shit, and there are many things to be sad about. You don't need to be happy to do What Needs To Be Done, you just need the willingness to just stand up straight, the courage to protect, and to hold true to the oaths you've sworn to God.
And I think that's the difference between Joy and Hope. Having Hope means you won't fall into despair, that the world is unfixable, that nothing will ever be okay again. Hope and Joy together are certainly very powerful, but I like the narrative of not being a beacon of Joy but still holding Hope deep in your heart all the time.
Wisdom, Patience, and Diligence just feel like very natural combos, especially for an outsider from a poorer family. You won't be easily lead astray, and you can take things at your own pace rather than feeling strong external pressure. You have your internal compass, and you know what's up. You'll stick with it. And Diligence, I feel, is just a good thing to have. Hard workers are nice, and it's a good motivator. Sometimes shoveling shit sucks, but you'll shovel it anyways.
Altogether, I think it's a solid narrative of a morally upright underdog who knows what needs to be done, and the willingness to do it anyways. It's a classic narrative, but hey, it's a good one, and honestly, you guys definitely wanted a character who was willing to cut through bullshit and drama and willing to do the dirty work when needed when reading, idk, Arthuriana or the Song of Roland, lol
Can't wait for someone to be utterly based and make a Delita Heiral build though--
CedeTheBees
Probably high right now
- Location
- Somewhere
- Pronouns
- They/Them
[X] Plan: Haste Makes Waste
-[X] Cynewyn (Female)
-[X] Temperance
-[X] Reason
-[X] Patience
-[X] Diligence
-[X] Superbia
-[X] Outsider
Prideful, but not a snob about it. She knows she's the best, and the best don't need to rush into things. All will know their greatness in time.
-[X] Cynewyn (Female)
-[X] Temperance
-[X] Reason
-[X] Patience
-[X] Diligence
-[X] Superbia
-[X] Outsider
Prideful, but not a snob about it. She knows she's the best, and the best don't need to rush into things. All will know their greatness in time.
fair, I think I could replace it with [ ] Tongue-Tied it could work for the kind of character I want to make, but I am not sure.
Also, do you think Invidia would work better than Gula for the sake of interesting flaw, I think that with combination of Tongue-Tied being telling people what you really think about them could work well for someone who knew hunger and poverty. Who grew to slightly resent others who had what she lacked.
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- Pronouns
- He/Him
That has some anti-synergy, build wise, as the build is otherwise decently invested in being social and well-liked. You could do it, but there are some coherence issues.
Yeah, fair, I was mostly going for Virtues I wanted and didn't put too much thought into the flaws. Fair warning to everyone voting for my plan, I'll rework the flaws (with help from the QM in the Discord) to be something more palatable for them, though I will try to keep the vibe the same.
AeonIlluminate
The power of friendship and aggressive landscaping
- Pronouns
- They/Them
[X] Plan: The Beautiful Knight (And The Monster Within)
True, enough. I will think on if I should replace gluttony with envy. Both work for character I want to make, but sudden spending for glutonny is making me reconsider, envy though could make things worse, so much worse...
Alright, I've reworked the flaws in my plan to be more palatable to the QM, it now has Luxuria, Gula, Outsider, and Branch Family, Branch Family, basically ending up more of a "Kicked Puppy with Super Special Magical Powers" than a Wizard, but it's good enough to go through the Quest and get into magic with.
- Location
- Earth
[X] Plan: Ruat Caelum
Changing my vote. I had second thoughts on Superbia, since it's, you know, Lucifer's signature sin. I like Wrath as a Flaw, and Hope as a boon was my main other want.
Changing my vote. I had second thoughts on Superbia, since it's, you know, Lucifer's signature sin. I like Wrath as a Flaw, and Hope as a boon was my main other want.
Superbia got swapped out of plan Wizards Rule, Fool, it's now Luxuria and Gula for the Deadly Sins.